When you ignore the narcissist's hoover, causing the narcissist an internal breakdown

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  • Опубликовано: 26 окт 2024

Комментарии • 160

  • @joebhouse
    @joebhouse  9 месяцев назад

    Don't forget to check out my other Channel -
    m.ruclips.net/user/results?sp=mAEA&search_query=chillin+with+joe

  • @tauzerm
    @tauzerm Год назад +134

    Because they have mental issues it is better not to have anything to do with them

    • @emmamonroe3311
      @emmamonroe3311 Год назад +26

      💯 agreed! And this illness never ever goes away. So stay away infinity.👈🏻

    • @fionahawkes1758
      @fionahawkes1758 Год назад +24

      It's spiritual issues also I reckon... The rabbit hole with those cluster B's runs deep 😮

    • @12BY6
      @12BY6 Год назад +15

      So true... You have to refrain from seeing them as a healthy person and treat them according to how you would've sny strangers who behaved that way.. because that's what they are

    • @12BY6
      @12BY6 Год назад +4

      @@emmamonroe3311 so true

    • @emmamonroe3311
      @emmamonroe3311 Год назад +1

      @@12BY6 they will take you down with them if you don’t listen to your gut instinct. They are the human version of a natural disaster almost like they are their own tornadoes.

  • @enigmariddle8222
    @enigmariddle8222 Год назад +91

    THE BEST REVENGE FOR NARCISSIST,,,!!!! SILENCE IS THE BEST FOR NARCISSIST WHO DOESN'T VALUE YOUR WORDS 😂😂😂

  • @josephhale9198
    @josephhale9198 10 месяцев назад +40

    It's fun to shutdown the HOOVER

  • @tjfSIM
    @tjfSIM Год назад +123

    I did feel bad for her, and I let her back in. I already have that sick, panicky feeling and I feel like I’ve given my power back to her again.

    • @hannahassan2574
      @hannahassan2574 Год назад +46

      You need to get away from her as far as possible !

    • @terridillon3053
      @terridillon3053 Год назад +29

      I want back once, never again!
      It was 10x worse
      She nearly killed me

    • @tjfSIM
      @tjfSIM Год назад +16

      @@terridillon3053 Yeh it always seems to get worse each time doesn't it? It seems like they become more cruel and heartless each time we go back to them. Hope you are doing better, and on a happier path.

    • @tjfSIM
      @tjfSIM Год назад +3

      @@hannahassan2574 Yep. I know, I only wish it was as easy as that. Thank you for your comment though :)

    • @wayneelliott1180
      @wayneelliott1180 Год назад +14

      Don't beat yourself up about it. It's a learning process. The job now is to get out. Construct a safe way to leave - that's if you can't just go No Contact, which is the best and most effective method. Be prepared for the victimhood scenario and the smear campaign. Try not to react to any of it. Remember we are only things to them, narcissistic supply, and they will throw us away as soon as it pleases them to do so. They will never change.

  • @ct00001
    @ct00001 9 месяцев назад +31

    As hard as it is to accept initially, just remember that your relationship with them was merely incidental. You're not special to them. Literally any source of supply will do. Let them scrounge around and find what they're looking for somewhere else.

  • @stylist62
    @stylist62 Год назад +45

    They don’t recognize or appreciate anything you give and do
    They are so up and down day to day don’t think, so quick to backstab.
    A kind nice person is enough to trigger abuse on you
    They are completely lost🙏🥵💔They deserve feeling the pain, they are pure evil

  • @TIMP-g2k
    @TIMP-g2k 9 месяцев назад +13

    Burnt their bridges and we have moved on. Thus the Hoover is transparent and we aren't affected.

  • @philphil4042
    @philphil4042 Месяц назад +2

    My ex gf went full psychotic, she began to hear voices and saw ghosts everywhere. These evil monsters refuse to accept help.

  • @ruready705
    @ruready705 Год назад +41

    It really sucks when it's your parent

    • @constancemiller4279
      @constancemiller4279 Год назад +6

      He been tracking my car since 2017 when I stopped being his friend. Restraining order didn’t stop him from staking me. It’s been nearly six yrs since I left him after a brief
      9 month relationship and yet every three weeks he’s playing with my car locks. Trying to get me to reach out. I just ignore him. He’s an abusive man. Never again will I speak with him. Hope some day he’ll move on….

    • @emmamonroe3311
      @emmamonroe3311 Год назад +2

      @@constancemiller4279 wow that’s nuts. Are you sure he doesn’t have ASPD also.

    • @constancemiller4279
      @constancemiller4279 Год назад +5

      @@emmamonroe3311 hey may. He just won’t go away. He’s married and he still keep coming. He used to break into my apt but I have wired camera that can catch him so if he’s doing it , he’s not moving items around anymore. Just a nut.

    • @Angie-r9c
      @Angie-r9c Год назад +2

      Wow 😮

    • @emmamonroe3311
      @emmamonroe3311 Год назад +2

      @@constancemiller4279 what a psycho! Was he married when you met him or did he lie to you about being single?

  • @jjones4314
    @jjones4314 Год назад +42

    My exN has made several attempts to contact me over the past 3 yrs. since we split up even though he's with someone else & now has a child with her. I don't respond in any way & never will!

    • @Ladyjojo695
      @Ladyjojo695 Год назад +10

      Exactly the same as mine. They are all the same. Unbelievable. No contact indeed.

    • @mostHigh23
      @mostHigh23 Год назад +3

      Your a smart woman 😜.

    • @miamiflorida6965
      @miamiflorida6965 Год назад

      🙏🩷🙏

  • @BeTheLight624
    @BeTheLight624 2 месяца назад +5

    Never accept a hoover
    They will tell you some romantic lie the use as sucker bait, then slam you down worse than before making you pay for doing it to them first. You are putting yourself in great peril and some of us may not survive going another round with them. They are emotionally imbalanced.

  • @gracesanity6314
    @gracesanity6314 8 месяцев назад +8

    No energy given....indifference.

  • @ShannonBlaikie
    @ShannonBlaikie 5 месяцев назад +11

    I disagree that the narcissist is in pain, more that they are empty and need to be refueled from your supply! The narc. gets his/her kicks inflicting intentional pain on their victim! 14 months of silence and out of the blue the narc. shows up at my house unannounced! I ignored him, he obviously only wanted a quick fix of supply just to feed his ego! Nope no supply from me! Iam onto his game! Sadly it's the victim that's been emotionally damaged and has a journey of lengthy healing to endure!

  • @ashleyh5101
    @ashleyh5101 Год назад +47

    I could listen to you all day long. Not only is your content some of the best on the subject, but your voice is so incredibly healing. It’s like soothing salve for my narcissistically abused broken heart. Thank you so much for what you’re doing. You are such a gift and a blessing to more than you’ll ever know🙏🏼

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      Me too. This is the best I’ve felt in years😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @alykat-101
    @alykat-101 9 месяцев назад +7

    you’re so right… cant respond to him. whats the point, only going to give myself false hope and bring back horrible memories. he took advantage of me and he can go be with all the other girls who make him feel whole. i know no one will ever love him like i did. he’s also stalking me and he has a whole fiancee and baby and he’s still hoovering me after he chose to discard me. i swear these people have zero remorse, zero emotions, zero feelings, its all about them. 🙄🙄🙄🙄

  • @ShaiMarlin
    @ShaiMarlin 9 месяцев назад +6

    Recently got destroyed by my ex narcissist and stumbled across your videos to try and heal. Thank you so much for all the kind and reassuring words. You just know what to say and it really resonated with me. Again appreciate your videos. Thank you ❤

  • @OneWhoKnowz
    @OneWhoKnowz 11 месяцев назад +14

    I let my ex come back in for a bit to see if she actually had something of value to say of course she wanted small talk. We broke up on bad terms and I walked out and blocked you lmao 😂 what might that be! I don’t want u so I told her the small talk was uncomfortable and unless we addressing what happen I’m not open for small talk she blocked me; this I know she had a need to one up me and make me feel bad by blocking me 😂it doesn’t Idgaf cause soon as she contacted me I had anxiety and my body went into fight or flight. I don’t trust her and I don’t like her. I finally am victorious and that means I have healed because I’m not interested in reconnecting when someone disrespects you let your absence and silence speak Louder than your words

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      This was brilliant. It made my day. It took me like 20 minutes to actually read it bcuZ I could NOT stop laughing omfggg!!! I am literally in tears. Laughed so hard I peed on myself😂😂😂😂
      So glad I found this Chanel 🙌🏽

  • @Gwendeline
    @Gwendeline 4 месяца назад +6

    He a coward n my energy will come back long before him

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      Reading these comments gave me life. I was married to my narc for 22 years, together for 26. 4 grown children , 4 grandchildren (1 deceased) The mental and emotional abuse is crazy. I couldn’t understand why I was so depressed. But honeyyyy a week ago today he had the audacity to stay out all night. I woke up around 5am and realized he wasn’t home. I IMMEDIATELY BLOCKED HIM FROM EVERYTHING, including the damn apple iCloud 😂. I jumped up so fast and packed all his things, literally EVERYTHING and had it waiting by the door with a respectful note on the table stating “take ur clothes, fishing rods, ALL THE DOGS and leave the keys”., then went back to bed. Around 10am I heard the door slam. I didn’t move, I laid there expecting to hear to removing his things. But nothing. 20 minutes later I went downstairs pretending to get coffee and he had left the house WITHOUT his things and still had the keys. 3 days later I texted his best friend to tell him to get his stuff or it’s going out for trash. He finally came to get it, but trying to start an argument. I completely IGNORED him. HE WAS PISSED!! Haven’t talked to him since. My birthday is tomorrow, needless to say he’s NOT invited. It’s driving his crazy bcuZ I’ve NEVER been strong enough to stand in my power. Yesterday my daughter called saying her dad wanted to come bring me his check. I handled all the finances (of course) I told her to tell him I left for the weekend to celebrate my birthday and to keep his money bcuZ he’s gonna need it. Needless to say, I AM COMPLETELY DONE WITH HIM AND I FEEL AMAZING!! He on the other hand is loosing his mind bcuZ he can’t comprehend how I beat him at the game he’s so good at. Oh well!!! I’m going to have him served with papers on the day of our anniversary with a note saying “GOOD LUCK” with a CRISPY 1.00 bill😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @scotttully8572
    @scotttully8572 3 месяца назад +2

    In light of our children, I responded to their hoover with a list of necessary changes:
    - Moving away from their mom
    - Therapy
    - Sharing.
    Never got an answer.

  • @lindagodwin3680
    @lindagodwin3680 5 месяцев назад +5

    The new supply wasn't working out so great for him. He began hoovering me. Ofcourse I had no idea during this time anything about narcissistic cycle and behavior. He wanted me back but deep down in my heart ❤️ I knew that he had problems. So I decided that we could only be friends. He eventually became very ill with stage 4 prostate cancer and renal failure. He gave up on me and found someone from his past to be his supply and she became his caregiver, servant, taxi driver and mommy. She started spending less time with him and he fell asleep in death by himself in his own house. After that I realized that he was a narcissist and I came across your channel and other channels that helped me to understand what I went through all these years! Thank you.

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад +1

      Wowwww. I am a Christian, however this was very funny/not funny bc he passed. U ALWAYS reap wut u sow. His Karma came swiftly/deadly at the same time. Glad ur on ur healing journey. Sad to say, but at least u won’t have to worry about him hovering anymore!! The part about her becoming his caregiver, taxi, mommy etc was hilarious. Omg I have to go pray ASAP🙏🏾

  • @markh4926
    @markh4926 Год назад +21

    I guess this was a hover. She dumped me so I accepted and began to ignore her. Three weeks later she ambushed me while I was relaxing outdoors. She came up to me and started yelling at me. I listened to her and then waved her off with a backhand move and told her to go away. She hasn't gone away for a year.

    • @TheGripHindi
      @TheGripHindi Год назад +2

      😂😂😂😂

    • @HarryHeath-pb6rv
      @HarryHeath-pb6rv Год назад +1

      Because maybe you have broken boundaries the weakness of our flesh right we know

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @sheilamurry9875
    @sheilamurry9875 Год назад +23

    Everytime ,I mean everytime you let them back in your life, it can be years,I guarantee you that there will be more havoc.
    Stay in your safe haven ✨️

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @Meera-vu6fu
    @Meera-vu6fu 5 месяцев назад +3

    Even a normal person would hurt if the partner left them !

  • @wintergoddess8210
    @wintergoddess8210 Год назад +14

    I was with a malignant Narcissist for 34 years and 6 children he and his whole family planned my death so i sent him twice to jail once for Domestic Battery by strangulation and the 2nd for stalking me still after 2 years of divorce he won’t stop were going in and out of court because all his family is involved in the stalking there all fighting to take my permanent restraining order against him off but the judge understands there all schizophrenics and he keeps extending it they lose every-time its Karma😂😂

  • @TurinTurumba
    @TurinTurumba Год назад +7

    Great video bro, very helpful

  • @lioubovgrant1935
    @lioubovgrant1935 Год назад +14

    One video in the morning ☕☕ and one afternoon🍷🍷makes perfect Sunday 🌺🌹🌻. Thank you for great work, Joe !!! 🤗❤

    • @joebhouse
      @joebhouse  Год назад +5

      Thanks for your message, take care 🤗❤💫

    • @lioubovgrant1935
      @lioubovgrant1935 Год назад +2

      Thank you for magic of Joe B. House !!!

  • @skulpzilla2051
    @skulpzilla2051 10 месяцев назад +4

    I'm so glad I found your channel. Thank you.

  • @HEWholoves-w1d
    @HEWholoves-w1d Год назад +6

    Your pictures are good.

  • @user-cy9in5ry9c
    @user-cy9in5ry9c Год назад +10

    I went gray rock 1 year ago. He made failed Hoovers for 8 months , before he stopped trying - at least for now

    • @ceyciemateo9411
      @ceyciemateo9411 9 месяцев назад +1

      How much time would pass in between each hoover attempt

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @toshy5758
    @toshy5758 Год назад +10

    Thank you.. love your knowledge

  • @nishantkoshti2617
    @nishantkoshti2617 Год назад +8

    My nex was cheating on me for supply and was dating another guy behind my back for 2 months. Later she got engaged to that guy in next 2 months. They have planned marriage next year. I highly doubt it will go till that stage

    • @NSpireYouTV
      @NSpireYouTV Год назад +2

      No contact...
      They did you a favor not take this time and run 🏃‍♂️🏃‍♀️🏃

    • @fainitesbarley2245
      @fainitesbarley2245 11 месяцев назад +3

      Their ‘cycle’ seems to speed up as time goes on.

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @burymeinbaldwin5896
    @burymeinbaldwin5896 8 месяцев назад +6

    GOSO Get out and stay out!

  • @bvad7884
    @bvad7884 8 месяцев назад +2

    He hoovered me a month after discard and he has new supply. But I've been healing and going out lately and one of his flying monkeys follows me on social media, so i guess they told him and it made him hoover me quickly? The new supply is a total trash smut though so I knew he'd realize the grass isn't greener. I ignored the hoover though.

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢

  • @penibeni1085
    @penibeni1085 2 месяца назад +1

    My sons wife sent her flying monkey to troll me on a narc recovery support group on Facebook. I cant believe how far she'll go to turn my son against me.

  • @angellove-i2z
    @angellove-i2z Год назад +4

    I enjoy ur topics, there is one topic the conditioning process everyone heard and knows it’s part of the steps the Marc must take , but not a lot r explaining how the narcissist conditioning processes take place it’s something he keeps using as long u r with him or have some kind of relationship, romantic, business, friendship…..
    Will be great if you have some knowledge to share, thank u❤

  • @robertwhitehead9831
    @robertwhitehead9831 Год назад +11

    She has hovered several times after testing the waters with a coworker causing me to move out after five years and an engagement. I answered the phone calls but did not offer a reconciliation. I have recovered and moved on. I am just too empathetic to completely ignore when she hoovers bc I genuinely believe she would totally self destruct and I would be forced to help her out of my empathetic nature. I know who she is now and would never go back.

  • @Joy-pj2tw
    @Joy-pj2tw 11 месяцев назад +5

    You don t go out with someone for fun, take up a hobby instead like drawing, swimming, walking, running, etc 😂

  • @sscot720
    @sscot720 10 месяцев назад +9

    Do not respond AT ALL

  • @irisjasmincook6918
    @irisjasmincook6918 2 месяца назад +1

    He tried over ❌. Even took ma cover pic and plastered it it on his profile
    I must have angered him because I fooled him by ignoring him and playing stupid when he thought he could squeeze me like a lemon 🍋
    No, i felt straight away that something had been wrong in that perspective and answered with a big red question ❓

  • @jessicakilby1678
    @jessicakilby1678 5 месяцев назад +1

    Funny thing is, I don’t even think I was main supply. We were not even that good friends. After a series of red flags I cottoned on and inched away slowly without creating a fuss. She felt the shift and invited me out. I said no thank you. I sat in complete blank faced silence during her trantrum and a guilt trip & she stormed off. She thankfully ignored me for 9 straight months. I was convinced it was over. Then out of the blue she write me a letter ( blocked on all other platforms) which she posted in the middle of the night & turned up at my house with flowers randomly!! I didn’t read the letter or answer the door. But I’m wondering why….. ??? Why all this effort…., supply must be short on the ground!

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @foxerrr7864
    @foxerrr7864 10 месяцев назад +6

    I can’t believe how similar all of them are. How almost all of these apply to every narcissist. You are once again hitting very familiar buttons.

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      I thought I was the only person on this planet to ever deal with this. I starting gaining weight, loosing my hair, unable to eat or sleep for days. They psychopaths are nuts. Karma is a B!!! Reading this makes me feel so much better. EVERY STORY SOUNDS LIKE U ARE DESCRIBING MY HUSBAND!!! I’m literally realizing I am NOT insane. Thank u🙌🏽🙏🏾😂

  • @ST-vw7gu
    @ST-vw7gu Год назад +5

    INSIGHTFUL

  • @koffee3336
    @koffee3336 Год назад +1

    thank you!

  • @mostHigh23
    @mostHigh23 Год назад +8

    Do narcissists commit suicide?

    • @irielion3748
      @irielion3748 Год назад +15

      Some do, yes. Sadly, their grandiosity often protects them from seeing how sad and terrible they are.

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @Mjones4949
    @Mjones4949 Год назад +9

    My ex got engaged after 3 months. Guess she got lucky with a grade A supply again?

    • @nishantkoshti2617
      @nishantkoshti2617 Год назад +11

      She is a narcissist. How long will it last? That's the question 😅

    • @fionahawkes1758
      @fionahawkes1758 Год назад +14

      Lol be thankful that she'll be his migraine & problem in general instead of yours 👍 breathe a sigh of relief 😊

    • @Mjones4949
      @Mjones4949 Год назад +5

      @nishantkoshti2617 No doubt she's a covert narcissist. She checks every box, during and after discard.

    • @goldilocks3593
      @goldilocks3593 Год назад +8

      You’re supposed to be insanely jealous - FYI 🤦‍♀️

    • @wmhhealth2018
      @wmhhealth2018 Год назад +13

      My ex got engaged after 8 months. I waited a year to pop the question. We were engaged for 2 years leading up to the discard. He proposed on her birthday and at a restaurant she and I used to frequent regularly, to another male widower just like me. Her MO is totally predictable and laughable. Their play book doesn't change just the supply. She's his problem now 😂😂😂

  • @griffinhines7012
    @griffinhines7012 4 месяца назад

    thank you ❤

  • @Gwendeline
    @Gwendeline 4 месяца назад +1

    Suffering for him isn’t even close enough for his dept to his son his friends n exes nor me he can’t go on much further before he wears everyone around him out n he will never ever think or miss me because he goes beyond a coward for the deaths he has knowingly n admitted he was behind! I don’t need to go to the authorities he’ll be caught by his own hands

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 День назад

      OMFGGGG THIS IS A GROUP I NEVER KNEW EXISTED BUT DEFINITELY NEEDED!!!! I HAVENT FELT THIS GOOD IN YEARSSSSS😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @goboudou
    @goboudou 9 месяцев назад +2

    This lasr time he discarded me he did not hoover at all

  • @ellencaroline2065
    @ellencaroline2065 10 месяцев назад +3

    I think they Are Godless but not [godless]

    • @azariyahsmith6439
      @azariyahsmith6439 23 часа назад

      Wow I could never get my narc to pray with me, let alone go to church. I was so stressed I went and got Baptized again for the 3rd time. Only to find this group to understand the problem was never me😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @azariyahsmith6439
    @azariyahsmith6439 23 часа назад

    😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @Shirley-t9b
    @Shirley-t9b Месяц назад +1

    Stop please stop telling people the narc misses there ex they don't miss the people they miss using them that's all it's what you gave them. Nothing els.

  • @onlyonce1707
    @onlyonce1707 Год назад +2

    Are you sure about this?

  • @Thatsbannanas-d8c
    @Thatsbannanas-d8c 10 месяцев назад +1

    That hurt.