The 10 Worst Rulers in Crusader Kings 2
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- Опубликовано: 13 июл 2024
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#ck2, #alzabohd, #crusaderkings 
Игры
CK2 is free on steam! The "Old Gods" DLC is also free if you subscribe the CK2 mailing list: www.crusaderkings.com/#subscribe . More EU4 coming soon!
thank you for this!
Can you install mods such as Elder Kings and A Game of Thrones if you have the Steam version of the game?
Serge Lévesque yes ive seen people do it idk how but you can
The Sword of Islam DLC was also free for a few days last week.
Thx,already signed it just need to draw the code and put it on the steam code thing
The worst ruler in CK2 is me when I accidentally click surrender instead of enforce demands >:D
*Northernlion Reconquista flashbacks intensifies
Me in eu4 when i beat ottomans with byzantion and i accidentally clicked accept capitulation XD :/ ;(
I was like that until I started HOI4 it's only kill or get killed
fail koifish fail.
@@Urlocallordandsavior god that hurt to watch
"Nobody conquers the Tamil Kings"
Amazing Bill Wurtz reference.
TBF historically only people who managed it was the British
except for me. *proceeds to conquer the tamil kings.*
@@TheManofthecross most of the tamil kings
@@marcus4046 right you should had put that bit in the statement or that caviate in there somewhere. lul
@@TheManofthecross gonna do it they way bill would say it...
"there is no way you can conquer me!" says the tamil kings while being conquered
"I thought this was a video of ISP" comments are coming
I thought this was a video of ISP
And again i thought the same thing
And again again i thought the same thing
To be honest, that was a first thing I thought about that intro
I thought this was a video of ISP
Now you have to play a campaign as that ancient woman
I tried 6 times to get her to leader of satanic cult for demon impregnation but she dies so quickly, a campaign would be very short lived lol
just savescum ez
Hunting focus, dog/cat (dog is more likely with hunting) rerolling to get gluttonous (and hopefully fat eventually, feasts should help), does dark familiar clash with pet, and if not then can it give health?
I know there are some artefacts that give health but I doubt you can get them that quick.
Technically a very good physician and a mild illness on something that already doesn't take much health would actually increase your health but it's undependable.
If you start with military education you get +0.5 health.
you technically can get rowdy/strong (not sure which) from an event in martial focus but you can't afford to risk 5 years on that for an EXTREMELY rare event
Can a vassalized countess get the seeking immortality event, because I remember the martial one giving you robust
BUT you need AT LEAST 9 years to get rank 4 since joining
This is a very informative post thank you!
@@AlzaboHD your welcome
Iceland is actually extremely strong. You're immune to the black death, meaning if you set it to frequent you have very easy conquest. Also, merchant republic = OP
The only issue is that you sometimes have too many troops for your boats and so can't raid, but once you can, the world is your Hákarl
(Plague inc. flasbacks)
Also prepared invasions and warrior lodge
@@Dmitrisnikioff until the british isles etc retaliates and ends you.
@@TheManofthecross Usually they're not a huge issue, especially if they aren't united. It's not like if you foolishly try and settle on the mainland
“Phineas of Semen“
I would like this bc it's funny but on the other hand your GI profile picture is too cringy
@@e.a.forrest1388 Ok /leftypol/
Penis of Semen
*FERB,I KNOW WHAT WERE GOING TO DO TODAY*
@@e.a.forrest1388 your profile picture is cringy my friend
Once formed the HRE starting as the count of western Iceland in 769. Im a sucker for pain
You sick sick masochist
Christian Iceland makes me sick
Weirdest pronunciation of archipelago I have ever heard.
Still though, great video as always.
And the most sexy pronunciation of semien too
1:31 Archipelago
4:07 Israelites
Enjoy!
You should go watch Shut up & Sit Down's review of the game called Archipelago, they couldn't settle on a right pronunciation so they went for all of them
@@ajrobbins368 Not forgetting 4:26 Giacopo
Mujahidin and Shaykhah
phineas of WHAT
How does one pronounce Semien
@@AlzaboHD I think it's Sem-yen
Lol right
@@AlzaboHD say-me-an?
As soon as I heard it, I came looking for a comment like this haha
It's genuinely amazing and impressive just how many words you fail to correctly pronounce.
Welcome to the channel : - )
I fucking lost it at "King Phineas of Semen"
Giocopo is worst lol
Rude
He is american so he is excused
This thunbnail reminds me of the Ancap flag
Complete with the Frenchman from monty python noless!
With a silly person on top of yet another silly idea.
I guess you guys prefer good old slavery.
@@CakeRocketProduction Being a type of anarchism already implies that xD
"No one conquers the Tamil kings" Ah, I see you are a man of culture aswell
Who are the Tamil Kings?
@@divine2962 Merchants, probably
@João Aurélio who would like to buy the spices?
@João Aurélio Swiftly buying them and redistributing it to europe.
Who else ships Mu’unis & Adelgundis?
As ISP sinks deeper into Depression and gets closer to ending it all, we have a new maplad connoisseur in the form of AlzaboHD. Although you need a cooler nickname for your second channel/ Adversary. ALHD sounds nice.
King Eadmund of east Anglia was a real dude and pretty metal. The story goes that he didn’t want to convert so the Vikings tied him to a tree and made him into a pin cushion with arrows. They knew that Christians believed in very specific burial rights and if the whole body wasn’t present to be buried, the person couldn’t go to heaven. So, they cut of eadmunds head and hid it in the woods. Eadmund was pretty chill about the whole ordeal, and played a Viking age game of Marco Polo with the east Anglians, guiding them to his head with his disembodied voice. When they found his head, it was being guarded by a fox, so animals wouldn’t eat it. They buried him and now he’s a catholic saint.
@The Nova renaissance it was Aella from northumbria
You could also try to get insanely lucky with the Babushka by having the following unlikely events happen:
1) Have the Immortality quest chain fire.
2) Survive long enough for the entire quest chain to play out.
3) Turn out to have had a real immortal, not a charlatan, as your mentor.
4) Succeed in the correct mentor's correct test by picking the correct answer... and then getting quite lucky.
Yeah. It certainly ain't moving her any higher in this list.
Late reply, but when female reaches ~45 years in this game, her fertility is set to 0% and you get -6(?) modifier " is past child-bearing age"
Iceland is actually pretty easy honestly, mainly because you can raid
I had an interesting experience playing Iceland campaign. I played it even before the Holy Fury dlc came out.
>Started as opm chief of Iceland.
>conquered my neighbor (with event troops because of steward "build a legend" activity).
>married the sister of Ragnarr, created an alliance with him.
>used it to conquer Gothland (wasted my Subjugation cb on it).
>raised an army a bit with 500 prestige, used it to coquer Føroyar and most of it's de-jure duchy.
>changed religion to catholic, took a loan, expelled jews, invited some rich landless persons to court. They were soon spied, slandered, imprisoned and expelled for the reason unknown (but their gold wasn't expelled, lol)
>created the duchies of Iceland, Føroyar and Gothland, used a desicion to create a custom kingdom, so I am no longer de-jure part of Norway.
>Converted to merchant republic.
>After 200 years, my Great republic of Iceland didn't expand any borders, but instead it developed in depth. Now it is an abolutly centralized state with 10 well-developed holdings, that is colonizing the whole Britain with it's trade posts. Some kingdoms try to break free, but they don't stay a chance against the brave 10k troops of my holings' levy, retinues and custom mercenary company. My ruler has 100 monthly income, my capital is the richest county in the world.
Yeah, IMHO, that wasn't difficult country to play.
@@anobstinatecephalopod4605 i tried playing in iceland, but then i got bored and delleted my save LOL
I’ve actually played the Sawdan Emirate and managed to work my way up to Sultan of Italy.
This is like the only Paradox youtuber that doesnt rely on shitty memes or clickbait. i love this channel
I would like a CK2 guide on murchant republics in the 762 start date. I’ve been having some trouble and it would be nice to know a general strategy
Murchant
Its been a while since Ive laughed this hard.
Something about these lords in their...enviable positions.
Its the definition of a Greek Comedy.
Hey, sometimes people are just born to suffer...
"Oswaldo take me"
-Said no one ever
man, your commentary is hilarious... keep up the good work
"Visigothic babushka"
Subbed.
"The bosom of this vizigothic babushka" XD XD This is one mf-ing SsethTzentach level line right there.
Love your channel and content Alzabo!
You should do more silly videos !
Your voice is so soothing it is amazing ! Subscribed.
That "Sabbat Shalom" sounded real unnatural there.
After "Israilly-ites" and "Is Rail" what were you expecting?
Yay new AlzaboHD video!
Love the CK2 content
CK2 is amazing fun!
I started as Count Giacopo and within one generation I was the king of Eygpt, most starting places are easy if you just betroth your children to strong realms. If you fabricate a claim to the land to the right of the Pope you can semi easily become a Duke and expand more from there.
Loving the CK2 content. Great stuff
I remember playing Crusader Kings 2,
I had a very powerful nation,
but one day i was at war with 2 other kingdoms and winning,
But then i got declared war on by another,
They were no king but a mere adventurer,
I laughed at the adventurer at first,
But this i looked at their profile only to see that they had over 53k troops and were destined.
Oh god, everytime I see King Phineas of Semien it triggers my PTSD. I have tried to make a successful jewish campaign far too many times and I never managed to do it.
Same
#oyvey
I managed to pull off the Kingdom of David achievement starting as him. Granted it took about a week of playing and I failed on my first try due to being burned at the stake as a heretic after pledging allegiance to the Muslim emperor. Pro tip on that never become a counselor if you are still openly Jewish. Because if you do you will be in their court and they can execute you. Also focus on getting the silk road trade post's around the horn of Africa in internal wars and moving your capital. Things get easier after that.
it's so hard to be jewish in this game, I feel u
It's easier nowadays - secret religion, China interactions... I did this as a nearby tribal ruler, whom became Jewish after holywarring Semien and reforming as MR (Jewish MR - for more narrative, ya know - all those Radhanite quarters...everywhere). Suck Pooh milk for years (tributary and/or marriage) and ask him to shatter Abba, easy from there :)
I kept thinking that every single ruler was the absolute worst, until you got to the next one. Also, LOVE that reference to bill wurtz ;) Also, jesus christ this writing, "busting his nut on #3" goddamn pure genius.
Lmao!
I swore that the ruler of the Canary Islands would appear, I played with the ruler of these and ended up being emperor of Maghreb.
Dude this was a really awesome video. I knew there were duds out there, but it's fun to see them on blast. 😸
Finally another person besides ISP with a cursed Ironside intro!
You deserve more love Alzabo
1:47 Someone watched the history of everything
Thinking to myself* CK2 looks really fun, maybe I should buy it. Alzabo: CK2 is free to play now. Me: God is real now lets deus vult.
You can get one of the best DLC's "old gods" for free by signing up for Crusader Kings mailing list: www.crusaderkings.com/#subscribe . Definitely worth checking out
Sword of Allah is also free right now on steam.
@@Mac-po1sr WAS free, until Monday... :(
Thanks everyone. I missed out on sword of Islam but at least I got to finally play last night. Also the word play actually means hover off the ui and read tool tips and just click on everything to try and figure out what it does.
Time to one-up your Iceland, I started as Iceland in 769 prior to the Monks, became Marathi, Hindu, and got the British Raj achievement in the process.
Still one of the funnest games I've ever played of CK2.
I've achived the number 7 and gotten Kingdom of David!💪
#5 Nordland is my favorite state to play as. It's not bad at all compared to the others you mentioned. I think the set up for the start date can be fixed easily by just switching your capital to Austisland.
Please do more CK2, absolutely love it.
I see this "dotted" province demesne province borders in nearly all your videos - could you please advise which mod does that? It looks really good and I'd like to use it too :-)
"Put the Christ back in Christmas" LMAO
Nice list of games worth playing Thanks, I would never found them myself
*debates wether trying to get the immortal event for the 69 year old countess is worth it for the meme*
I love a challenge. So glad to have all these options. Too bad CK3 won’t let you change times besides the specific start dates.
Seeing the Ironside intro always makes me do a double take because I’m so used to seeing it on ISP videos lmao
pretty cool that you started with count luitfredo. i just played a campaign with him where i became king of galicia as a catholic INSIDE the ummayad caliphate
What all these side icons near ruler when you select him? Is this a mod? Or i simply didn't noticed it in a main game?
"Noone conquers the tamil kings" i see what you did there (btw: Iceland exists in CK2? Wow)
the canary islands also exist
@@valonyaver600 Fucked up writing iceland sorry
@@valonyaver600 yep but I don't know why Paradox believes that in Canary Island we were moors previous to the conquest... maybe because they were lazy to design a new model for natives...
@@mariano98ify Or perhaps the Canary Islands are really unimportant for that game.
@@mariano98ify why would they need to design a model for such an irrelevant minority
Say it with me now How-Carl (Hákarl)
Its a difficult one! Are you from Iceland?
@@AlzaboHD yep and I know it's hard do say lol
High Chief Zistisbor of Sorbia in the 867 bookmark is pretty bad, you can't really invade it's neighbours, which are Greater Poland, a tributary of Greater Moravia and East Francia. In the north, however, is the Chiefdom of Dymin, which is worth like nothing. You start with a trash army and only 2 martial. And most of the time, you get invaded by Greater Poland, which you'll probably not survive.
I'm currently playing Maldives. It's the year 923 and my grandson just inheired Raj of Vengi from his mother who was married to my son. Then he actually conquered Andhara so he is Maharaja right now and he is also my successor. Yes, I have primogeniture succesion law because my spy studied legalism technology in Byzantium. So as you see, playing as Thakur of Maldives is not that boring and pointless as you may think.
"blot out the sun with arrows and jihad"
Thats new
"then we will fight in the shade."
Alzabo I know this isn’t related to this video, but I run quite a lot of Ai only games in eu4 and I’ve just seen “city of shekty” is this rare?
"Eager to put their Chirst back in christmas" :D
Praise *S A N T A* of Armies !!
Your pronunciation is something special....
Iceland is fun as. They are not bad if you know what you are doing. In my playthrough I focused on ship building, made my way from Iceland to Ireland and began my conquest to conquer to the UK. It was really fun.
Iceland 867 is a really fun, and absolutely doable start. Ever heard of viking raids? (plenty of ships) OP Pagan prestige retinues? Just pick 'Become king' ambition and you get free subjugation CB's on everyone in your kingdom. You can blob like crazy as ANY Pagan Norseman with decent martial in 867.
Iceland 1066, Now that's hard!
you forgot to mention aldgisl of ostfriesland in 769, a single county in between francia and saxony, that campaign is beyond pain
We need MOAR CK2 vids
More are on the way!
Could we get a top 10 CK2 mods video?
OMG you are very funny dude! :D Visigothic babushka! LMAO
I don't even play this game but I can't stop watching these
High quality Bill Wurtz reference
I actually had a pretty good came of Giocopo; I was able to take over most of Italy while remaining a vassal to the Pope. If I remember correctly, I conquered the counties of Southern Italy and took advantage of HRE civil wars. By the end I was a Duke, the Pope's ONLY vassal, and very wealthy.
The Ssethtzeentach is strong with this one ) I like it ))
i had to check if its an ISP video when i saw that intro
I usually do the 769 start so for some of these guys I can play it in non iron man mode and use wemod and some cheese to get these guys up there real fast and see what happens.
#5 is Iceland
We Do Not Sow flashbacks intensify
8:30 France is involved it's "menage a trois" automatically! ;)
I actually had an Eadmund of East Anglia campaign....let's just say the Vikings didn't last 20 years and I formed Brittany within 50 years. Fun campaign that one was....would recommend a Brittany campaign any day.
I once formed a merchant empire, starting in Iceland ended up conquering france, scotland, england, wales, ireland, scandinavia, muscovy, jerusalem, castille, part of morocco, arabia, ethiopia, some land in the caspians sea and the holy roman empire. Sometimes you just got to go full merchant.
"Papa Supreme himself" I FUCKING DIED HAHAHAHHAHAHAHSGHSHSJAJAJ
Nice thumbnail. Fucking love Monty Python and the holy grail 😍
So, isorrowproductions what hoi4 mod is this?
What happened with ISP`s voice?
I think that will be a Isorrowproductions videos.
Like that Bill Wurtz reference
funny how you mention giacopo of orvieto as i am just playing a game with him. married mathilda, made secret shia cult. as i had 3 sons and tuscany has gavelkind my prefered heir needed to kill his older brothers, which made me quit my secret cult and join the assassins. after i killed both of them he died as well and my heir was still 10 yo and i had obviously lost track of my secret cult until... my liege, the holy roman emperor flipped the whole HRE to shia. lol
Plz do Ck2 achievement lists of hardest
Its possible to play as the shaykah. You just have to get the matters of life and death event. Either reincarnate as a baby or become immortal.
You neglect to mention Sawdan also has to deal with the fact that his lands are De Jure Byzantine Empire territory, so there is literally a looming threat that they or their vassals might declare war on him at any moment.
I was actually able to unite Iceland and form the Kingdom of Norway from Sudorland, it's all about hitting people while they're down and gathering a fortune from raiding.
First one and I'm already getting flashbacks of my many failed attempts at a Suebi Spain :(
Ally france, kill the ummayad. In emergencies take a loan and hire mercs.
for a moment i thought i was watching an isorrowproduction video its because of that intro
I find Iceland very easy I was just trying to get Res Publica as I have recently learnt the joy of achievements, I had built a merchant Republic with my second character, I was planning on converting to Catholic to reform but the king of norway reformed the faith for me
I'm a relatively new player and I rolled over the entire north and formed the Empire of Scandinavia with relative ease from Iceland. It's not a hard start at all.
The worst ruler is that one bastard you accidentally legitimized when assigning guardian
I watched this video mostly for the jokes... and I wasn't disappointed. x)
ISP and Brightsides unholy child
Now this is what I wanted!
9:07 I see what you did there.
The #Stivale Easter Egg
Honestly the iceland starts aren't even that bad as long as your martial is good. Just raid until you have the prestige to prepare an invasion someplace, and no nation can really siege you down either. Really, the situation isn't much worse than any other small norse count in norway.
jeez this guy should teach a class on alliteration and puns