What Is Scientology?
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- Опубликовано: 11 июн 2008
- James Spader explains Scientology in an episode of Boston Legal.
Show: Boston Legal
Season: 3
Disc: 2
Episode: 5 - Who's God is it Anyway?
www.xenu.net
www.whyaretheydead.net/
www.lisamcpherson.org/
www.youfoundthecard.com/
www.whyweprotest.net/
www.exscientologykids.com
www.cs.cmu.edu/~dst/Library/in...
www.cs.cmu.edu/~dst/Secrets/in...
stop-narconon.org/
www.factnet.org/
www.lermanet.com/
news.com.com/2100-1023-959236....
www.rickross.com/groups/scient...
www.scientology-lies.com/
www.scientology-kills.org/
www.chillingeffects.org/ 
Приколы
Scientology for Dummies in less than 2 minutes and 40 seconds!
Thank you Boston Legal.
I prefer the south park version but not bad.
Yes, thank you. It took me a while researching the same information about these people. I wish I'd seen this first. I could have saved myself a lot of time.
@@Jeremiahservant THey did Mormon better. And made MILLIONS doing it. It is called "Book of Mormon".
@@Iansco1 yeah that was pretty badass dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
@@Iansco1, the Mormons don't get violent when they're mocked. There's a reason there'll never be a musical called "The Book of Scientology"...and it isn't because there are many, all of which are unreasonably priced.
My son was a scientologist. I am glad to say he has left that cult. Scientology almost destroyed him.
Scientology is a cult
Mormonism is a cult
Jehovah's Witnesses is a cult
Hmm... I'm starting to see a pattern, here.
What do scientologists do to him?
@@jaeger9654 They stripped him of his kids. His father did not speak to him for 15 years because he left scientology. They brainwash. Scientology did eventually destroy my son. He is dead.
Christianity is a cult
@@jaeger9654 They brainwashed him for start. They took his father and children away from him. In scientology, if you leave it your family leaves you.
"Here's where I can almost taste the maple syrup." refers to a bet made between the two lawyers earlier in the episode.
A sexy bet :)
What was the bet ?
@@saikat93ify The loser slathers the winner in maple syrup then has to lick it off, or something like that :)
@@OneWithManyThings Hmmm. In that case, wouldn't SHE be the one tasting the maple syrup?
(I LOVE maple syrup! But not sure I'd enjoy it so much under those circumstances.)
@@RUclipsallowedmynametobestolen If I were Alan Shore, fine either way 😎
James Spader is one of the coolest actors ever.He is just plain awesome.
He is the Lizard King after all.
Yup,...old Alan Shore
Slicker than owl s..t on a doorknob!!
Add AMAZING . HE CAPTURES YOUR ATTENTION
James Spader is one of those 80's and 90's actors that sucked in everything they did during that time (except maybe for Stargate), but surprisingly and thankfully, either learnt how to act or found his inner actor once he matured. Now you see him here or in the Blacklist and you can really tell that he is a fantastic actor.
The final score
Alan Shore : 10
Scientology : 0
Although it's not reality that the Scientologist would admit it. They are told to lie and deny the Xenu stuff. They're told if someone not "prepared" learns it they'll die or something. They deny the Xenu stuff even to other Scientologists that haven't reached OT3.
"Are they all nuts?"
"Most!"
Gah that line is priceless!
I'm a Christian, and I honestly thought that was hilarious.
@@Warrior1Spartan Same
Sad
Well he's not fuckin' wrong!
@@kingy002 sad
How did scientology not prevent this with their army of lawyers?
Thank god Boston Legal was able to do it. Scientology is way more than just quirky or weird. It's absolutely scary.
Same way Matt and Trey keep making fun of them. Just have to be willing to defend. Another great Alan Shore line "truth is am complete defense".
Was wondering the same thing. But I’m so glad it was able to air!
Because they would get shut down immediately. Freedom of Speech is in the show's favor.
Didn't Shore simply recite off "facts" that Scientologists believe? Forgetting for a second about freedom of speech, exactly what basis do you think their lawyers would have to shut this down?
@@sharkracer That's the thing, even if they know they don't have a case with a solid foundation, they can scare people away just based on how much they'd have to pay in legal fees to try to defend themselves in court. That's like their main tactic.
The best part of this is that Alan Shore knocked that whole speech out, while holding in a fart for the perfect moment hahahahaha
Think of it as punctuation.
Special effects. Not Spader.
James spader. The only man who can make a fart joke legitimately, deeply funny.
Oh come on now. All farts are funny. 🤣😂✌️
@@louskunt9798why is that,exactly?
"So basically every time you piss, puke or crap, you're a step closer to immortality" - "Getting closer as I speak"
Probably the best line in the history of film making!
Technically true, since aging brings us closer to death, & you can't die twice. Once you die, you can't die again, & are therefore immortal. This is a point referred to in the first scene of the movie "Evita", when Eva Peron's death is announced "she became immortal at...", etc.
Bit of a stretch lol
Only a provincial might think that. Bravo.
I almost took a step closer myself when I nearly pissed myself laughing at that last little squeak.
you left the fart
The fact is, Scientology is not just a silly religion, it's a dangerous cult.
amen !
all religions are. Jevovah's want all your belongings to prep for the End of Days, Christians want your money to repair the church all the damn time, Scientologists are just crazy and also demand all your money. In fact, every religious cult demand you pay them.
wish more shows had the guts to take on this creepy cult.
Kudos to Leah Remini!
"getting closer as i speak" that was hillarious
Funny thing is that the “if a man really wanted to make a million dollars they’d start a religion” quote was said by Hubbard, George Orwell said “there might be a lot of cash in starting a religion” and Hubbard was nearby but that’s as close as it gets
Whether Orwell or Hubbard said it is irrelevant; it's pretty flippin obvious. It is well known that religions rank among some of the wealthiest organizations on the planet. And isn't if funny how they are almost all tax-exempt....
@@xaenon something to do with taking funds from a religious organization, separation of church and state.
@@TwistedPixelGamer You have to remember something - in THIS country at least, 'separation of Church and State are a thing - at least, it's supposed to be,.
Unfortunately, that isn't the case. Religion is manipulating legislation, policy, education, etc. CONSTANTLY. They're adamant about pushing their doctrines into our PUBLIC education. They've bypassed accreditation for having their shit thrown at our children. Ever been in a 'dry' county? RELIGION. There are laws on the books, even to this very day, that disallow those in public office if they aren't Crisss Chinnnnnnnnnnnn
Who did Donald Trump claim he was the best friend of? RELIGION. And look at how all the religions threw in right behind him. And look at how batshit nuts they've become since. Oh, they've always been weird, but lately? Just off-the-hook, get the sedative, wide-open-throttle and a shot of nitrous *NUTS.*
Hubbard was probably plagiarizing. I read one of his sci-fi books. Dreck.
@@666toysoldier _Dreck_ . How very complementary? A friend once told me that L. Ron Hubbard wasn't a science-fiction writer's arse-hole... but I stood up for him and insisted that he was.
“Are they all NUTS?”
“Most”
Christians like to think about themselves as the poor victim in the gladiator arena but 99% of them is the audience in the gladiator arena.
One of the best written monologues in recent TV history ... absolutely class and amazingly its true :-)
This one and the one about gay conversion were priceless.
This had me rolling🤣🤣🤣. James spader's delivery is hilarious and genius.
I'm sure this is exactly what the writer had in mind.
Alan is simply the best. Is there is a living person who comes a little close to this character I would relay like to meet him. Why can't people be more like this guy?
I was just about to say, this is why they created The Blacklist, because there was a large market of people who wanted more James spader rants and wit, but then I realized this was 11 years ago and you wouldn't have known that yet. :]
Best way to discredit religion (any religion, but scientology in particular) is to let the believer explain it.
Boston Legal lost its way a little in later seasons, but early on Alan's courtroom rants were as funny as they were vicious. Amazing show.
Replace two words in your comment!! Funny = Accurate, and Vicious = Truthful.
If court was actually like that I would never try to get excused from jury duty.
He did a good job of describing Scientology.
"Christians believe jesus will come again, are they nuts!?"
"Most!"
rofl
Yes, we are peculiar people😇
@@snbforever not peculiar, just nuts.
@@ZoeSummers1701A, you say potato...
Give us a break. I think its only 2 out 3. Yeah ok that's most.
But i think the reason for that is because only 1/3 actually read their own bible that all claim to believe and actually know what they believe in. Claiming you believe in something without actually knowing that that is, is I admit NUTS. just as nuts as claiming not to believe in something you never read
Then by that comment. I’m nuts. Come on in, the water is fine. Jesus is Lord, God and Savior.
scientology ain't a joke though. they got field agents stalking you, and their strategy for expansion is absolutely scary. seen it firsthand happening at my campus. thankfully most people just don't care that much.
Maybe thats why its illegal in some countries as a criminal enterprise
@@Jeremiahservant The FBI's (!!!) attempts to surveil the cult were abandoned, due to scientology's hiring of private investigators to find dirt yo smear members of the FBI. They had serious dirt on both individual agents and senior staff in the agency that caused then to back off. How fucking astounding is that boys and girls? They successfully imtimidated the godddamned FBI. Ruthless and dangerous doesn't begin to cover it.
Xenu approves this message.
Sorry I missed this one. Who says TV is the ignorance box? Those who don’t watch this type of well-written dialogue are missing out on the very best education ever. Life experience!
With a belief system like that and they seriously wonder why they get ridiculed.
This clip is ABSOLUTELY PERFECT! It says so much truth about Scientology in less than 3 minutes. And we didn't have to pay anyone our entire earnings to find out the truth! I think I am CLEAR! aaaahhhhhhh...
"...and here's where I can almost taste the maple syrup..."
hehehe
This is the most amazing episode. Everytime i watch it, i detect a new detail.
Alan Shore farts at the end, fucking killed me 🤣🤣🤣😂
"And christians believe 'jesus' will come again. Are they all nuts?" *_"Most."_*
I would have said, *_Yes, every god damn one of them._*
"So, everytime you piss, puke, or crap, you're a step closer to immortality."
"Objection!"
*Farts*...
..."Getting closer as I speak."
Hahaha.
a powerful closing argument!
James Spader is such an excellent actor.
Watched this episode last night and i was cracking up despite seeing it about 50 times before
Thank you for saving us approximately $100,000.
Oh, man...the CoS must not have been happy about this.
The list of things the CoS is unhappy about doesn't bear thinking about.
@@richarda29 Most con artists DO get a bit perturbed when skeptical people call them out on their bullshit.
@@xaenon, yes, but very few of them are con artists. That would require them to be aware Scientology is a con. The witness did make a salient point different than the one he intended: he asked rhetorically whether Christians were crazy, implying that Scientology was valid because Christianity was. As the lawyers say, he was assuming facts not in evidence. Logically, deflecting away from a religion being a sham by asking whether a different religion is a sham is a weak argument. There are two possibilities the witness isn’t considering that would each counter his position: first, that Christianity is more valid than Scientology; second, that all religions are frauds.
That is absolutely hilarious, I love you James Spader. I'm quite surprised they got away with filming and airing this with the whole Xenu story. Though, slightly unrealistic. I don't think the "church" would let anyone on the stand answer things so straight forward. There's not a bit of obfuscation in sight. But then, I don't know the premise of this episode.
A lot was revealed, but as I've been deep diving Scientology for a few years, I do know that Scientologists categorically deny the Operating Theta's info and the Menu story, because those who aren't in the know are unprepared, and could die from hearing the story.
"If attacked on some vulnerable point by anyone or anything or any organization, always find or manufacture enough threat against them to cause them to sue for peace. Peace is bought with an exchange of advantage, so make the advantage and then settle. Don't ever defend. Always attack. Don't ever do nothing. Unexpected attacks in the rear of the enemy's front ranks work best." - L. Ron Hubbard, Hubbard Communications Office Policy Letter, "Department of Governmental Affairs", 15 Aug 1960
I really need to watch this program just for these scenes 🤣🤣
"Christians believe Jesus will come again, are THEY all nuts?"
"Most"
:D Classic :D
Why
Because a mortal becomes an immortal and is to return, I use to believe the same thing. 👍
@@55Quirll im not sure what u mean. We are all immortal just inside of mortal bodies
@@chile_en_nogada2090 For me, immortality is our being remembered by people, when we are no longer remembered, we loose our immortality 👍
@@55Quirll Doesn't that idea go back to the ancient pagans of old?
wow, I never thought it would take a show like boston legal to explain scientology.
Scientology is such a rich source of satire - all you have to do is just state their beliefs accurately.
Ditto Xianity/Judaism/Islam/YouNameIt. You think talking snakes and donkeys and burning bushes and stories of "thou shalt not kill" from a skydaddy that kills tens of millions just in what's written in a nonsensical holy book are really that different?
A cross-examination with flatulence. I never dreamed it would happen.
That's simply wonderful!!
Great post! Thank you!!!!
And, reportedly, he said it at a cocktail party in the 50s held by fellow SF author L. Sprague DeCamp, and attended by Robert Heinlein and Arthur C Clarke, if recall the story correctly.
It's really a fantastic show. I just got season 1 for my birthday and it rocks.
At the end, “getting closer as I speak” LMFAO 😂😂😂
@videonaj P.S. Here some more Hubbard quotes to mull over: "Make money. Make more money. Make others produce as to make more money." (Principles of Money Management 9 Mar 1972).
"The only way to control people is to lie to them." Lecture: "Off the Time Track" (June 1952) as quoted in Journal of Scientology issue 18-G, reprinted in Technical Volumes of Dianetics & Scientology Vol. 1, p. 418
One of my favorite Episodes
The writers of this drama are the best. Thank you.
Revoke Scientology's tax exemptions
Alan you are just perfect , love you
"And here's where I can almost taste the maple syrup"
Is enough to send me to the hospital dying
Denny Craine. My favorite law show. Boston Legal was my second favorite.
This show is insanely good.
They have a policy called "fair game", which basically says that critics have no rights, can be deprived of property or injured and may be "tricked, sued or lied to or destroyed." (google "Paulette Cooper")
They have their own prison camps where they send anyone who does not follow the rules precisely. (google "rehabilitation project force")
They have their own court, which is an extremely biased system in which anyone who opposes the cult is severly punished. (google "committee of evidence")
"Objection" *fart* "getting closer as I speak" LOL
The man can flat out act!
" .... and here is where I can
almost taste the maple syrup".
😎😎😎😎😎
awesome!!...james spader is automatically cool in my book
Alan Shore for president!
But well, on second thought...
Delightfully outrageous show!
This series is on Hulu 🤗🤗🤗🤗. Time to start watching again.
I love the way they've filmed it.. just like the Shield on FX :D Better television quality today is hard to find;)
aw man I frickin love this show!
LOL @ "...are they all nuts?" >"most..."and the last part is funny
Best show everrr
Boston Legal
educational show. I love it.
"Basically every time you piss puke or crap you're one step closer to immortality"
ROFL!!!!
Brilliant.
I just decided to give this show a chance, even though it doesn't seem like my type of show.
Scientology not only tolerates lying but actually presents formal training in the subject:
"Purpose: To train the student to give a false statement with good TR-1. To train the student to outflow false data effectively. The student should be coached on a gradient until he/she can lie facilely."
-L. Ron Hubbard, Intelligence Specialist Training RoutineLying (TR-L)
Love this lawyer funny as hell
...my crush on Alan Shore just exploded into full-fledged love.
hilarious! I never saw that before, great stuff wahey!
One of the best shows ever.
Brillant! James Spader deserves an Oscar for that!
Well, Maybe an "Emmy"!!
I love the *sqqquueell* Getting closer as I speak hahahah CLASSIC funny!!!
And you as well.
Nice to have a civil conversation.
Hey, it's Robert California!
"Here's where I can almost taste the maple syrup" LOL
Thanks, but really my answer barely scratches the surface. There is a lot more to it. Keep reading and you'll see just how dangerous this cult is.
Oh I forgot to mention Lisa McPherson, one of the most tragic deaths in Scientology. Locked in a room for 17 days in an attempt to "cure" a psychotic break brought on by a head injury with a quack therapy invented by Hubbard called the "Introspection Rundown". She died of starvation and dehydration.
So basically everytime you piss, puke or crap your a step closer to immortality.
I love it. Love James Spader and love Boston Legal.
The end....I'm dying 🤣
getting closer as I speak wow that guys a genius xD
Many of the cult's "therapies" have lead to mental and physical breakdown, bankruptcy, broken families and death.
On top of all that, they make everyone sign a contract when they join. Anyone who signs it is unable to take legal action against the cult. Of course, this contract is NOT legally binding, but many people believe it is.
This show was ahead of its time
Thanks man, I needed this!
So, you agree that scientology is a corrupt religion?
"charging money so it can grow"??!! That is not ethical behaviour. Charging money for bullshit is fraud. Even if other religions do it, it doesn't make it right.
Most, if not all, are. Religion is both a way to give life meaning, and to control a populace, while making money off of that population in the process
They are all bollocks
Any religion that charges money in order to obtain salvation is crap
Bono said " The God I believe in isn't short of cash , mister"
Religions are all refined industrial-grade bovine byproduct, shipped express and delivered in bulk.
They get away with this by effectively convincing their followers to tie their very identity into the schtick.
What's the difference between a cult and a religion?
Tax exempt status
Perfect finish to the clip!lol
Right on the money. Good clip.
still like the south park version better :-)
It's all in the rolling disclaimer!
“And Christians believe Jesus will. Are they all nuts?!”
“Most.”
Magfuckinificent
BEST SPEECH EVER!!!!!
When you have a teacher who can't explain student me like. "I want my lawyer"
Best quote:
Alan Shore: "Well, in fact, most scientologists believe Brother Hubbard will return?"
Defendant: "And Christians believe Jesus will come again, are they all nuts?"
Alan Shore: (nodding) "Most..."
I am very happy for your son, others are not so lucky with this cult. To leave this cult takes bravery and courage as scientologists are morally blind manipulitave thugs.
I salute your son.
Owned in so many different levels.
Well done