TAKE NOTES: When Struggle LOVE and WEIGHT are RELATED!

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  • Опубликовано: 1 фев 2025

Комментарии • 452

  • @ShekaGolden
    @ShekaGolden Месяц назад +200

    LIFE in general sucks, even for skinny people, so it should be understood that trying to compete in the dating market for a high value man is going to come with some difficulty. I’m not saying ppl should be ashamed of themselves, but like any other goal, I think woman should do as much as they can to succeed, and that includes losing weight if necessary.

    • @amumhlaba4331
      @amumhlaba4331 Месяц назад +9

      Exactly.

    • @PrettyGirlDiscernment
      @PrettyGirlDiscernment Месяц назад +1

      Working out and healthy eating should be a must. There are tons of videos that girls can watch and work out at home,
      no need for fancy gyms. And tons of videos on how to eat healthy on a budget. All it takes is determination 💪🏽

  • @AndthefuturelookedBlack-hq7hy
    @AndthefuturelookedBlack-hq7hy Месяц назад +682

    "Health & Fitness" are NOT "European" beauty standards. They are Universal standards.

    • @lalamega1146
      @lalamega1146 Месяц назад +25

      Thank you this!! So tired of people lying to themselves!! And not to be mean, but sometimes women go after men who are not attracted to them for various reasons(i.e weight, height, personality, etc.) instead of listening and focusing on themselves, many just want to be lied to and pandered to.

    • @bre9612
      @bre9612 Месяц назад

      @@HausOfAdonispoorer nations want their women to have ‘more meat on their bones’, because being overweight and/or obese means that you have more resources feed yourself. It has nothing to do with beauty, but survival and self preservation. The point is is that being a healthy weight for your height and genetic predisposition is the universal ideal beauty standard for women, regardless of culture.

    • @victoriabeckfinat225
      @victoriabeckfinat225 Месяц назад +19

      Say it again! Vast majority of black women icons have slim body types or were at least slim in their youth. Slim thick is something that was promoted in the black community but eventually became perverted by overweight women who knew they didn’t fit the standard.

    • @YasheeLee.
      @YasheeLee. Месяц назад +3

      ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

    • @RJames-uy2mt
      @RJames-uy2mt Месяц назад +3

      Nah, it’s European. The lady speaking on this channel was giving yall a lot of reality and accountability. I know most of yall aren’t used to that.

  • @kokoalaska9888
    @kokoalaska9888 Месяц назад +780

    In my youth, I didnt want to listen. After losing over 100lbs, DATING HAS BEEN NIGHT AND DAY.

    • @hainleysimpson1507
      @hainleysimpson1507 Месяц назад

      People are attracted to health. Obesity is not healthy.

    • @glowupwithwonderwoman
      @glowupwithwonderwoman Месяц назад

      Period!!!! On a date right now with someone who would not have texted me back 50 pounds ago. He went to the bathroom and I was like …👀new drop from Chloe_ 🥂

    • @itzyogurlEleanor
      @itzyogurlEleanor Месяц назад +18

      I was a good weight when I was younger and heavier as I am older. I am losing weight now

    • @jessicahitchens6926
      @jessicahitchens6926 Месяц назад +4

      Its good for your well being.

    • @Shay-rx4xu
      @Shay-rx4xu Месяц назад +5

      Congrats hun

  • @cocomocha
    @cocomocha Месяц назад +615

    I heard someone say that being overweight as a woman is like choosing to live life on hard mode.

    • @Hersheychocolate12
      @Hersheychocolate12 Месяц назад

      It’s just funny how this all said.
      But even current generation rising rates of autoimmune diseases and pcos.
      Not just from ultra processed foods but so many environmental/physical/pollutants/modern human living catching up with our bodies.
      Being a woman esp woman of color or black women your already on hard mode.
      Weight also ties into historical context of assimilation, white supremacy, and class.
      Of course do what you want with your body, like ppl trying to be better. But idk I think there is a lot think about with this conversation and what external factors beyond individuals where some of this derives esp this wave (I know there’s been talks of it before) but seems like it’s finally back.

    • @glowupwithwonderwoman
      @glowupwithwonderwoman Месяц назад +26

      Facts

    • @Lisette121
      @Lisette121 Месяц назад +23

      Ouch

    • @octbaby88
      @octbaby88 Месяц назад +10

      Wow...

    • @kathyberal5623
      @kathyberal5623 Месяц назад +8

      No lie told!

  • @JupitersKiss79
    @JupitersKiss79 Месяц назад +537

    Being fat is easy! Being slim requires intention and discipline.
    We all know the truth. When you look good, especially as a woman, regardless of color, the world is yours! People like beautiful things ❤
    #GetFit

    • @wendym3654
      @wendym3654 Месяц назад +21

      So true

    • @kammyr4082
      @kammyr4082 Месяц назад

      ​​@@pinkangel444 just like being black. But is that some social standard we should uphold?
      Some ppl think no matter what being black makes you unattractive.
      Skinny isn't synonymous with pretty...... at all. 😂😂
      Yall are clueless & delusional af

    • @mariabrown6926
      @mariabrown6926 Месяц назад

      ​@@honeywest39j95 True, but most men would prefer a slim/toned woman with a mid face than an overweight woman with a beautiful face...

    • @jksmith9161
      @jksmith9161 Месяц назад +3

      🎯

    • @Trini190
      @Trini190 Месяц назад +2

      Not true

  • @DorothyPrince1
    @DorothyPrince1 Месяц назад +256

    I have gone from 280 lbs to 177 lbs (for context I am 5'9 - so the fact that I am overweight fortunately isn't as obvious) however, what slim kim said is true. The sad truth is that we as black ladies need to be skinny (see: fit) if we want to be "bitchy" about our standards. Honestly, my goal weight is 145 lbs and what I can say is that being skinny, losing the weight is so so so worth it.

  • @bernitarandolph1645
    @bernitarandolph1645 Месяц назад +268

    I think many overweight women myself included know this deep down inside. I personally have stopped dating until I can get my physical, mental, and emotional health under control. Self love will make you check yourself long before anyone else can. It is hard to love someone when you don’t love yourself.

    • @briana14333
      @briana14333 Месяц назад +18

      So true. Good for you & good luck❣️

    • @glowupwithwonderwoman
      @glowupwithwonderwoman Месяц назад +6

      Yes!

    • @shaunaboo961
      @shaunaboo961 Месяц назад +7

      Well said

    • @YasheeLee.
      @YasheeLee. Месяц назад +7

      Me too sis! ❤

    • @froyokid
      @froyokid Месяц назад

      Terrible. Men aren’t that great and certainly don’t bother working on themselves this much. You are beautiful inside and out and as long as you know your worth there is no reason to pause on your dating life cause you think you’re not enough. I’m saying all this as a slim girl. They are not worth this much effort.

  • @patrice6139
    @patrice6139 Месяц назад +120

    I'm dating outside my race and am currently engaged to an Asian man. Over the course of our relationship, I put on a lot of weight due to working a sedentary job, poor diet and constant snacking, and lack of exercise. My fiancée sat me down to voice his concerns about my weight gain, and it gave me the wake-up call I needed to change my habits. He was willing to put on muscle because I told him I liked a guy with muscles. So it was only fair if I put forth the effort and lose some weight.

    • @desdior1207
      @desdior1207 Месяц назад +27

      Yes that’s how a healthy relationship is supposed to be like. Communicate the issue. Not cheat and pillow talk about your partners weight gain behind their back. Happy for you choosing a healthy path

    • @Lozie82
      @Lozie82 Месяц назад +15

      I feel you. I married an Italian and he will comment on my eating habits if I start visibly gaining more weight. That’s his “nicer” way of saying I’m getting too big. I appreciate and encourage the constructive criticism though because I’m an emotional eater. Also, his diet has naturally changed my diet for the better over our 13 years together. Less fried foods and processed snacks… I don’t even remember the last time I fried some chicken lol.

  • @beedabee1221
    @beedabee1221 Месяц назад +94

    “Keep yourself competitive “

  • @islandgirl8067
    @islandgirl8067 Месяц назад +156

    As a former skinny woman who is struggling to lose weight, I liked myself better when I was smaller. I felt healthier and more energetic. Gaining weight has brought health problems, and aches and pains. I can't wait to get back to my former size. Slimkim has the right to like being slim, it gives her some advantages outside of the blk community.

  • @jazzisojazzy2642
    @jazzisojazzy2642 Месяц назад +203

    Being thick/curvy, I feel I’m over-sexualized; it leads to a lot of struggle love men. People always compliment my body in a sexual way; I rather be skinny😭 I kind of see why Ice Spice lost sooo much🤦🏾‍♀️ I don’t want to be walking down the street hearing “Dang you thick!”💀 I got to get skinny🤞🏾

    • @ImaniBelle-tu5nu
      @ImaniBelle-tu5nu Месяц назад +36

      It can be tiring being curvy . The men are more likely to sexualize you more but I don’t want to be skinny either because I don’t want to be too shapeless

    • @KJ-gz2vi
      @KJ-gz2vi Месяц назад

      @@jazzisojazzy2642 THISSSSS…I did not like having a IG model, video vixxen body. You attract guys who are very lust driven, immature, and lost. If you notice a lot of the famous video vixxens from the 2000s are very single. Men DON’T take super curvy, voluptuous women serious-- they’re like blow up dolls to them.

    • @daniella8400
      @daniella8400 Месяц назад +51

      @@ImaniBelle-tu5nuif you lift weights and actually workout you won’t be shapeless

    • @shanarobinson7672
      @shanarobinson7672 Месяц назад

      @@daniella8400THIS!!!

    • @TTSantiago821
      @TTSantiago821 Месяц назад

      She also dressed like a whore and carried herself like one, ice is a bad example lol. But I completely see your point!

  • @analea6531
    @analea6531 Месяц назад +64

    7:28 I hate how the first comparative argument when it comes to women’s weight is skin tone. Being dark skin is not on the same level as being fat. It’s not the same someone doesn’t get to pick and choose how light or dark they come to this world but your weight is your responsibility

    • @slixameth
      @slixameth Месяц назад +2

      But BOTH get called “preferences” when people are just parroting societal norms, & thinness alone is not virtuous & isn’t as simple as “just going to the gym”

  • @ninawestlake5005
    @ninawestlake5005 Месяц назад +392

    I love being slim and fit. It looks and feels better and ages better as well. Plus, the attention from men doesn't hurt at all. People should stop being so invested in their feelings and start taking action .

    • @DoveLady
      @DoveLady Месяц назад +28

      and i love being fat, i am happier and more confident in myself than i ever was when i was younger. men can tell, too, they treat insecure women a lot differently than ones comfortable in their skin.

    • @ImaniBelle-tu5nu
      @ImaniBelle-tu5nu Месяц назад +34

      Not just that but health is the biggest factor

    • @foxyboop4164
      @foxyboop4164 Месяц назад +29

      ​@@DoveLadyDo you love the ailments that will more than likely come with the weight, especially as you age?

    • @daniella8400
      @daniella8400 Месяц назад +10

      @@foxyboop4164she absolutely does

    • @pinkangel444
      @pinkangel444 Месяц назад +14

      @@foxyboop4164 People like her don't think about what happens when they hit their 40s and they ''suddenly'' start getting sick, they just pretend they don't know the consequences of their bad choices.🤷‍♀

  • @East_African_american
    @East_African_american Месяц назад +80

    I’ve been a size 16 and always been chubby my whole life. Currently I’m a size 6 and life has never been better! I feel better mentally, physically, and spiritually. I get treated better and get paid more. I LOVE it here🥰

    • @elallen4399
      @elallen4399 Месяц назад +2

      That treatment is fake asf

    • @Blaquebarbgamer
      @Blaquebarbgamer Месяц назад +6

      @@elallen4399That’s her life, don’t hate the player, hate the game.

    • @elallen4399
      @elallen4399 Месяц назад +2

      @@Blaquebarbgamer i wasn't hating at all learn to read she went from a 16 to a 6 and she feels like she gets treated better but to me it's not better treatment because she is still the same person at 250lb and 120lbs but ppl treating her better? But how much better cuz those PPl are just literally shells her personality didn't magically change and the fact that ppl move like that is fake asf

    • @Blaquebarbgamer
      @Blaquebarbgamer Месяц назад +4

      @@elallen4399 Like I said…don’t hate the player, hate the game, you’re proving my point. 😂😂😂

    • @elallen4399
      @elallen4399 Месяц назад

      @Blaquebarbgamer girl shut up and get a Brain

  • @UnpretentiousNae
    @UnpretentiousNae Месяц назад +42

    As someone who had dated while being slim and bigger, I can say there is a HUGE difference in the way men treat you. When I was bigger men would try to breadcrumb me and do the bare minimum. Now that I'm slim these same men go all out trying to impress me. I know a lot of women don't want to admit that weight is a factor....but it is.

    • @honeywest39j95
      @honeywest39j95 Месяц назад +10

      If that’s the case, then why do women who are not fat get mistreated and dogged out by men? If all it takes is to not be fat or overweight, then skinny and “in-shape” women would not have men problems as well. Let’s be honest here 🤷🏾‍♀️.

    • @jessicahitchens6926
      @jessicahitchens6926 Месяц назад +6

      Its confidence and not putting up with nonsense. Healthy and fit always wins out in the end.

  • @HigherEdBarbie
    @HigherEdBarbie Месяц назад +63

    I wish I’d listened to my Mom and the people who actually loved me when I was younger. At 5’10 I was 125 in my 20s and got up to 145 in my 30s. Perfect. I could’ve stayed either end. But I listened to the Black folks who criticized me for being tall and skinny and I begin to purposefully trying to gain weight. Worried about a big butt and things that didn’t matter. Now in my early 40s I’m working to lose 50 pounds 😩🤦🏽‍♀️ Thank God I’m tall because it doesn’t look like what it is 😂 but I know losing this extra weight will be life changing in many ways. I tell younger Black girls I meet who are thin and tall or petite to not let anyone try to convince them that they need to gain unnecessary weight or go get a BBL to fit in our community.

  • @Prettie1
    @Prettie1 Месяц назад +175

    No lies told Chloe - skinny will always be in.

    • @Mimi-ng9jn
      @Mimi-ng9jn Месяц назад +6

      Having a curvy body will always be in as well

    • @kujiwoo
      @kujiwoo 19 дней назад

      Skinny or healthy??

  • @kloves3910
    @kloves3910 Месяц назад +26

    Kate Moss said "theres nothing that taste as good as how skinny feels" i was a kid when i first heard that. I definitely believe her as a full grown women.

    • @DancingDeity
      @DancingDeity Месяц назад +4

      That quote has been in my head since I was a teenager and it’s probably the reason I never let myself get fat. It’s something I say to myself when craving bread/pastries. Being slim in chic clothing is a great feeling.

  • @Bernicemaboko
    @Bernicemaboko Месяц назад +58

    Hi Chloe! Been watching your channel forever, I am 24 years old and considered skinny and currently dating an older CEO . He keeps up to shape! He keeps up to shape! And I can tell you that ever since I got skinny skinny, i have only been attracting CEOs, directors, board members... you name it. Get in shape ladies. it pays off

    • @mabxo9727
      @mabxo9727 Месяц назад +17

      You aren’t lying! Talking this COO we start dating. I’m 4’11, 114 lbs, size 2, 27 no kids and a black woman. White men prefer petite tiny women.

    • @heyheytherethere
      @heyheytherethere Месяц назад

      @@mabxo9727facts! I’ve noticed this since I was little😅that’s why I’ve accepted I’ll probs marry a successful Latino man, so I can keep my thickness😭

  • @GildedMirr0r
    @GildedMirr0r Месяц назад +81

    As a health coach, what the med student said at the end is FACTS. Naturally reverse insulin resistance. ❤

    • @pamelasbutterflylife1312
      @pamelasbutterflylife1312 Месяц назад +12

      @GildedMirr0r Yes Yes and yes🌸! Thank you for your comment🌹! I, too, am a health and life coach! At my heaviest, I weighed 310 lbs, and I'm only 5'2. In 2019, I weighed 275 lbs, and I was miserable and was just sick and tired of being sick and tired🥴! I lost 140 lbs naturally in less than two years without exercise, shots, shakes, pills, surgeries, or strange foods♥️! I don't gate keep!
      I changed my nutrition and released all of the junk, Ultra processed food, sugar, grains (bread, potatoes, rice, quinoa, pasta) drank a gallon of water, and sleep 7-9 hours a night, and intermittent fast🥰! Most of us are not in the space where it hurts enough🥺!

    • @HarrisPilton789
      @HarrisPilton789 Месяц назад +1

      This!

  • @crystalhill7663
    @crystalhill7663 Месяц назад +375

    In this age of "political correctness" and "body positivity" I think people can lose sight of what's actually healthy. Many women would rather fight for people to accept them as they are, than to do the work and level up. Bottom line is, I don't know anyone who has lost a lot of weight and said they had regrets about it, and that includes those that bark the loudest about body positivity!😊

    • @KevonnieElaine
      @KevonnieElaine Месяц назад +13

      👏🏽

    • @2cut32handle
      @2cut32handle Месяц назад +47

      Period! As a former big girl, I am treated much better with more respect now that I am slimmer. I will do everything in my power to never go back

    • @mskittyjones
      @mskittyjones Месяц назад +12

      You are absolutely 100% right!!

    • @robinmahan101
      @robinmahan101 Месяц назад +2

      🎯🎯🎯

  • @malikawilson7071
    @malikawilson7071 Месяц назад +172

    In society your weight matters. People look at you, view you and treat you differently. Kim spoke on what brings her joy. Why that’s so bothersome to others is beyond me. I’m 120 lbs and I’ve always been the slim black girl compared to the black community being known to like curvier shapes. But now at 34 I love my size and staying healthy and fit is important!

  • @jamillawebb3567
    @jamillawebb3567 Месяц назад +116

    While all people deserve love and respect, obesity is a huge issue in the Black community. I struggle myself to keep myself fit. Physical attraction matters to all of us. I will say this, I’ve been a nurse for almost 20 years and one of my most difficult days in the hospital was caring for a pregnant mama who was 400lbs. I literally could not get out of the bed the next day. My body was in so pain. Holding her legs, keeping her comfortable, helping her labor, keeping the monitors on her belly to asses the baby’s heart rate it was alot. Unhealthy and rich foods are abundant and comforting and they have alot of us in a chokehold. I want to see black women live well, thrive, and be here to raise our babies. Maternal mortality is tied to our health and while racism and faulty healthcare systems are to blame, we also need to do our part when it comes to caring for ourselves. we deserve our best. Let’s invest in our health and be honest regarding obesity. 💕💕💕💕💕

  • @beeha8133
    @beeha8133 Месяц назад +72

    Men like well proportioned women. As a 5’10 girl at my smallest in my adult years I was a 9/10 and still 195-200 because muscle and legs lol.. It’s a lot about how well you are built. I will never be very skinny because it would take starvation to achieve, I go for toned and stacked. It’s a lot about being healthy and looking good naked. And that Kim girl wanted to go viral so she put the one on the two. Some have it easy because of genes, others have to work harder. I promise, as long as you aren’t sloppy, men gonna holla.

    • @Thrivegrl24
      @Thrivegrl24 Месяц назад +19

      This right here 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾. Because the one time I got skinny I was accused of taking crack also people have to understand your proportions and that includes your head size. No bobble head over here .

    • @briana14333
      @briana14333 Месяц назад +5

      Hey height twin👋🏾

    • @beeha8133
      @beeha8133 Месяц назад

      @ Hey😁

  • @cj8537
    @cj8537 Месяц назад +57

    This message is literally meant for me. I’ve been walking and dieting for about 10 weeks now, because I realized this years ago. I just thought about giving up because I didn’t see any progress, then I get this video notification…this video is confirmation that I should keep going❤️

    • @pamelasbutterflylife1312
      @pamelasbutterflylife1312 Месяц назад +11

      Oh my word🥺! Please keep going❤! You got this! The future you is just one decision away from continuing to put yourself first. At my heaviest, I weighed 310 lbs. In 2019, I weighed 275 lbs, and I'm only 5'2. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired😭! I lost 140 lbs NATURALLY in less than 2 years without exercise, shots, shakes, surgeries, pills, and starvation🌸🩷!
      You are beautiful and DESERVE to be in a healthy mind, body, and spirit🧠💃🎇!

    • @chilechi1846
      @chilechi1846 Месяц назад +9

      You've started, and you will succeed. Quitting is not even an option. All the best!!!

    • @juanitamitchell8340
      @juanitamitchell8340 Месяц назад

      But how did you do it!​@pamelasbutterflylife1312

    • @kloves3910
      @kloves3910 Месяц назад +2

      Keep going dont give up, u will see results gotta stay consistent

  • @cosmicbeauty5682
    @cosmicbeauty5682 Месяц назад +102

    I cringe when i see women going to these panel conventions, just to ask questions that should be obvious to many. You all know the answers to your questions, but you're hoping these men that you're more than likely attracted to will give you a different answer 😒😒

    • @PureJoyJoyPure
      @PureJoyJoyPure Месяц назад +3

      Nothing wrong with coming together to talk issues out.

    • @bbgirl800
      @bbgirl800 Месяц назад +2

      ​@@PureJoyJoyPure yes there is if you are asking stupid pandering questions

    • @2cut32handle
      @2cut32handle Месяц назад +1

      ​@@PureJoyJoyPure No point in debating on issues when u already know the solution but are too delusional to accept it for what it is 😂

    • @kathiaserrano7740
      @kathiaserrano7740 Месяц назад +9

      And these are GROWN adults at these panels, right could understand young adults. Some of these topics should be common sense.

  • @gigif169
    @gigif169 Месяц назад +39

    A moment of vulnerability, i hate being invisible. When i was in school, my intelligence hid the fact i garnered no other attention. Now that im out competing in the real world. I AM INVISIBLE!! And i HATE IT!!!
    YALL im tired. I hate feeling like I dont belong. I know its because of my weight.
    Im going to the gym daily and therapy monthly
    Something gotta change

    • @briana14333
      @briana14333 Месяц назад +8

      Wishing you the best💗

    • @pamelasbutterflylife1312
      @pamelasbutterflylife1312 Месяц назад +6

      I am sending you love and healing energy! Once you become sick and tired of being sick and tired, your life and health will flourish and you will fly. In 2019, I weighed 275 lbs and I'm only 5'2. I lost 140 lbs naturally in less than 2 years without pills, shots, surgeries, shakes, and starvation♥️!
      I am a Health Coach and passionate about health and wellness, especially for black women🌸!
      When you are ready, release the sugar (cookies, pies, ice cream, cake etc, grains(rice, potatoes, bread, pasta, quinoa, oats, drink a gallon of water, and sleep 7-9 hours a night! Intermittent fast, and eat 5 hours a part and no snacking in between meals. Try not to eat past 6 p.m.
      Changed nutrition, water, and sleep is the secret Sauce to my natural weight loss🩷! Was it hard? Absolutely! Am I worthy of feeling so gorgeous from the inside on out and having boundless energy😭? Absolutely 🌸! Am I worthy of dating and will marry a kind and wealthy man? Yes🌸🩷! My entire world became so much richer and abundant! It all started with finally putting myself and health first❤!
      I pray that this advice will help you!
      You are beautiful and DESERVE to be in a healthy mind, body and spirit🧠💃🎇!

    • @kloves3910
      @kloves3910 Месяц назад +2

      Hang in there ❤

    • @BredotDon
      @BredotDon Месяц назад +3

      I’m rooting for you ❤

  • @SoutherbBelle
    @SoutherbBelle Месяц назад +110

    I am a gay man (i apologies for stepping into a woman only space), and unfortunately, being fit and in shape is also important in the Rainbow community. It is not everyone with a thiness mindset, but everyone is not brave enough to be scene with someone bigger.

    • @ThePinkPantha21
      @ThePinkPantha21 Месяц назад +23

      Honey, I was at the cafe last week and this guy was sitting behind me with a female friend. They were gossiping and a couple of times they brought up a couple of women and the main words out of his mouth was "what does she know, she's fat" 😂😂😂😂
      Weight matters to everyone. And people that say it's not important are ok with abuse.

    • @pettybetty1791
      @pettybetty1791 Месяц назад +7

      Weight matters to all human beings from a biological perspective. A healthy body weight signals you are a good potential mate who will most likely bear healthy babies.

    • @Lozie82
      @Lozie82 Месяц назад

      I used to deliver mail in the gay neighborhoods of Palm Springs and all of the men were fit. It seems like gay men are more into being fit than lesbians. Maybe because men are more superficial? Seems like I see more fat lesbians in relationships than fat, gay males.

  • @VirgosGroove3
    @VirgosGroove3 Месяц назад +191

    At this point, I’m trying to distance myself from the black community because the goal post is forever moving. I remember when I was smaller and in high school I got called “chicken legs”. Now everyone is on Ozempic 😵‍💫😵‍💫. I didn’t like how I looked thick so I make sure to keep myself in the gym, but there’s no sympathy when we bully skinny women.

    • @Sparkle-ey7iw
      @Sparkle-ey7iw Месяц назад +29

      Your body shouldn’t be a trend just like BBLs are a trend. Just be you and do what makes you feel comfortable

    • @rosesarered2285
      @rosesarered2285 Месяц назад +20

      Just go with what feels best for you and is healthy. If you notice, even when a woman does what’s in , someone will still find something else to pick over.

    • @katiepop3442
      @katiepop3442 Месяц назад

      Girl I was just having this convo about the goal post constently moving..At this point people gonna have to just kiss my fat azz❤

    • @wineinmysparetime1919
      @wineinmysparetime1919 Месяц назад

      Girl screw them! I was skinny too and still am slim for the most part. And yes, In our community we were considered the chickens, olive oils lol whatever. I used to ask my mom to buy me ENSURE which she wouldn’t lol, and I would go into GNC looking for weight gain powder. SMDH one day I said F it! I’m fine. There is NOTHING wrong with my slim frame. I embraced it toward the end of high school, throughout college and beyond. It’s crazy how many of the females who gloated in the past about being thick etc now resort to gastric sleeve surgery or now Ozempic. 🙄

    • @brandimclellan3247
      @brandimclellan3247 Месяц назад +6

      Distance yourself from nonsense, not a whole group of people. Especially if they are YOUR people! It's ridiculous to lump an entire race of people in the same group. Level up

  • @Mscocoapuffz
    @Mscocoapuffz Месяц назад +74

    The harsh ugly reality you will always get better treatment when you’re skinny. You will get treated better when you are considered pretty. I don’t care how many times people tell you to love your imperfections some of them. Yeah you can get away with like arm hair but others such as weight. It is a universal role, especially in western societies. Because a woman’s youth doesn’t last as long you have to be strategic with who you associate yourself and how you play this game in the long run. Also, please have a charming personality. You can look as good as you want, but if you really wanna get into some rooms, you need to have a good personality.

  • @RiseeRee
    @RiseeRee Месяц назад +58

    I literally hate the idea that fatness and obesity is the opposite of Eurocentric beauty standards. Fatness and obesity does NOT belong to us as POC! There’s a narrative that relates fatphobia to misogynoir/racism as if obesity is natural for Black women. It’s not! That notion just makes it easier for Black women to rationalize being okay with being overweight.

    • @victoriasewell8933
      @victoriasewell8933 Месяц назад +16

      THIS RIGHT HERE!!! Was literally going to comment the exact same thing. As if there wasn't a CLEAR rise in Black obesity rates that coincided with the rise of fast food, high fructose corn sugar, etc. Black women prior to ~70s were all small, slim, and in shape - this equation of black and fatness is so modern. Also "Eurocentric" like wtf, as if Asian women, hell even latina women don't celebrate fatness like this - East African women!?! The ignorance is wild.

    • @KevonnieElaine
      @KevonnieElaine Месяц назад +1

      Hmm this is good, I never thought about it that way!

    • @briana14333
      @briana14333 Месяц назад +7

      Yes, sis! It’s often cultural, not racial.

    • @smith6777
      @smith6777 9 часов назад

      Being overweight is seen as normal in America..

  • @mistresskoala
    @mistresskoala Месяц назад +109

    They're not gonna like this one sis lol. Accountability is too hard for some people. I had a coworker 5 3" and 300 lbs, told me she would never date a fat man said he needs to be fit to date her😂

    • @KevonnieElaine
      @KevonnieElaine Месяц назад +39

      Listen! It’s the delusion for me! My boss is the same way, big as hell but has the nerve to turn her nose up at big men.

    • @Maggs3
      @Maggs3 Месяц назад +8

      Lol ​@@KevonnieElaine

    • @pamelasbutterflylife1312
      @pamelasbutterflylife1312 Месяц назад +8

      @kovarcoley Chile....at my heaviest, I was 310 lbs, and I'm only 5'2. I preferred tall lean men🥴! My rationality was, "I'm already really big. Two huge people were way too much🥴." My ex-husband was 5'9" and lean! Preferences are a trip!

    • @omphilemoerane2569
      @omphilemoerane2569 Месяц назад +4

      Yup they want to be left alone to stay fat but refuse to date fat men. In college there was a girl like that trying to go after my boyfriend who was in great shape. While me and the other girls would be on our way to the gym she was outside waiting for her pizza to be delivered. My boyfriend was very much into gym as well. I never could understand how she thought it would have worked out between them when they were so incompatible both physically and socially😂

    • @joannwilson9097
      @joannwilson9097 Месяц назад +1

      No fit man would check for her sorry

  • @alyssiagonzalez
    @alyssiagonzalez Месяц назад +10

    I lost lbs and I went from 1st dates to Applebee's to 1st dates on yachts❤🤸🏾‍♀️🤌🏾✨️🧘🏾‍♀️

  • @MissBubblesNOLA
    @MissBubblesNOLA Месяц назад +34

    As an overweight woman on a health journey. I understand the commodity of looks in this society. I don't focus on what's fair, I focus on what it is. I'm 85 pounds down on my journey by running, changing my eating habits, addressing negative patterns and pathologies. Once I reach the 100 pounds mark, I will get a personal trainer to help me tone up as I lose my weight. I'm falling in love with my self more and more everyday. Yes, we should love ourselves and find the beauty in what's reflected back to us in the mirror. While being brutally honest with ourselves putting in the hard work. I'm a overweight woman who is not attracted to overweight men. All of my suitors have been skinny or in shape, but lack character and spiritual foundation that is necessary for me. I approve everything Chole says, the fat positivity movement is a scam and hurtful to any woman, especially black woman. We have enough to deal with on good day. Let's not add our weight to that list.

  • @woryenehbenson4702
    @woryenehbenson4702 Месяц назад +68

    Thank you Chloe it’s getting weird out here 😂

  • @RJames-uy2mt
    @RJames-uy2mt Месяц назад +9

    I love hearing a woman not pandering to emotions and actually holding other woman accountable. I salute the woman who made this.

  • @LexaLite
    @LexaLite Месяц назад +32

    Thanks to honest feminine content I saw the light and lost 90lbs in the past year. For me it was personally about money as people pay fat women less for equitable skills and work. Being thin as a woman is what having money is to a man.
    We dont like it when broke men feel entitled to more than they can provide for... and Ive heard the chats on the other side. The average man low key hates fat women in dating, they get seriously offended if a woman they matched and met with is overweight and they felt that wasnt properly disclosed.
    I neither agree nor disagree, but know I strongly dislike when a man suggests 50/50.
    So I just see it the same way.

  • @shavonne5057
    @shavonne5057 Месяц назад +19

    I have PCOS. I have to work really hard to maintain a smaller size. My Insulin Resistance is now finally under control

  • @Sparkle-ey7iw
    @Sparkle-ey7iw Месяц назад +27

    I’ve always been thick and curvy with a naturally big butt but I also have a pretty face and carry myself well. Men have always spoiled me and I’ve been proposed to several times. I think body proportions and a beautiful face matters as well. Not every man likes a super thin woman either but at the end of the day your body isn’t a trend whether you’re curvy or thin…women went from risking their lives for BBLs to risking their health taking Ozempic at the end of the day it’s about loving yourself

  • @ABGwithSass2
    @ABGwithSass2 Месяц назад +29

    At the end of the day. I’m just going to be me. Bigger or smaller. I am already a tall woman, 6ft. Losing weight is and has always benefitted me. Not my dating pool.

  • @LisaS483
    @LisaS483 Месяц назад +61

    Black women, the bottom line is that your weight is keeping you at the bottom of the dating market. It’s not racism, it’s not colorism. It’s the lack of self esteem and discipline that prevents you from taking care of your bodies. We can do better and we must do better, now! A fit and attractive black woman is always the most beautiful woman in the room and you deserve to be celebrated for your beauty.

    • @JupitersKiss79
      @JupitersKiss79 Месяц назад +2

      This!❤

    • @KayHunter-i8f
      @KayHunter-i8f Месяц назад +17

      Very true!
      I am tall, dark (I pass and pretend to be from West Africa :) curvy…. Proportionally curvy, and live in the suburds, so predominantly white ppl in the gym.
      When I walk in and begin to “train” necks BREAK! WW compliment and their counterparts stare in awe.
      Fit, feminine, black and beautiful will always win!

    • @acaciagirl
      @acaciagirl Месяц назад +4

      This is statistically inaccurate but I get you

    • @robinmahan101
      @robinmahan101 Месяц назад +1

      🎯🎯🎯

    • @exoticchocolatecaribbean_q5624
      @exoticchocolatecaribbean_q5624 Месяц назад

      ​@@KayHunter-i8fWhy are you pretending to be from West Africa?

  • @2011troya
    @2011troya 21 день назад +1

    Chloe_ i rate you for having an honest conversation on this. And the sabotage bit on him “accepting her fluffy” so he doesn’t have to compete against other, better quality men that might now suddenly find her attractive…spot on.
    Lets hope the message doesn’t fall on deaf ears.
    Lord knows having a healthy community going forward can only be for our benefit

  • @stellabellafontay9366
    @stellabellafontay9366 Месяц назад +56

    This is a tough one for me Chloé. My weight has been my lifelong struggle. I had a long stretch in the mid 2000s where I had gotten wildly skinny...on purpose. I had a severe eating disorder but I was getting so many compliments and receiving gifts and attention from men that I had never gotten before. Eventually I lost my "skinny" and things went downhill socially and romantically. It's true, being thin does attract lots of male attention but the difficult part is doing it healthy and sticking to it. It's doubly hard if your thin frame isn't naturally yours and you have to fight to be that way. 😮‍💨

    • @TheNewFeminine
      @TheNewFeminine  Месяц назад +35

      Thank you for sharing that. It's not about forcing yourself to be something that your'e not. It's really boils down to having that self love and being committed to being FIT for you. XO, Chloe

    • @pamelasbutterflylife1312
      @pamelasbutterflylife1312 Месяц назад +8

      I'm praying for you🩷! Losing weight is really a mindset shift and starts from the inside on out🌸! You got this! Fly🦋!
      You are beautiful and DESERVE to be in a healthy mind, body, and spirit💃🧠🎇!

    • @ZZealot-y3u
      @ZZealot-y3u Месяц назад +5

      So whatever y'all gotta do to lose that damn weight. It is ruining your lives. GET on the weight loss shot don't give AF what anyone thinks. Your lives are passing you right on by. F everyone get yo shi

  • @marig9236
    @marig9236 Месяц назад +90

    I live in a community where 80% are overweight. they struggle to walk, fit in their clothes, do not look or act happy at all. I'm sure if they do have health issues being overweight does not help. ---with that stated, they also do not eat in healthy food establishments here.
    Myself, I'm thin. I love not being overweight or chunky. My parents died young with 0 caution to their own health, I'm undoing that cycle. I don't want to live the fat arm lifestyle. Being thin has kept me employed with a nice salary, and kept high value mens' eyes on me. Being overweight isn't and shouldn't be the goal. --- but this is just my opinion.

    • @britneyt9253
      @britneyt9253 Месяц назад +11

      No, this is facts 💯💯

    • @user-fm7vg4dv1k
      @user-fm7vg4dv1k Месяц назад +14

      Not the fat arm lifestyle 😂😂😂

    • @KevonnieElaine
      @KevonnieElaine Месяц назад +5

      This!!

    • @rosesarered2285
      @rosesarered2285 Месяц назад +8

      Yes! I’ll still never forget losing family members as young as 5 from diabetes and heart disease I saw it as a huge monster. Most people thinks it’s just something everyone catches but when I realized you can actually fight back I make it my mission to always lose any extra pounds I gain before it ruins my health

    • @las8883
      @las8883 Месяц назад

      A lot of people do not want to accept that obesity is linked to so many health problems

  • @MillenialKay
    @MillenialKay Месяц назад +4

    This is motivation to be more consistent in self care next year

  • @Cococuts12
    @Cococuts12 Месяц назад +21

    All facts! I was at the gym today and overheard a yt woman saying how unhealthy someone looked bc her stomach was hanging over. At first I was offended for that lady but she has a slight point.(Although we all at the gym for a reason) This reaffirmed the beauty standard but moreover it shows how perception is reality. To her that is unhealthy although others who are considered slim can be in poor health too. Regardless we all judge based on what we SEE first. So why not have an amazing spirit wrapped inside a banging body? Social politics are unfair to those who it doesn’t favor. Weight loss is such a controllable aspect of life for most. This video just reaffirmed why I’m doing what I’m doing. To gain ALL the confidence in my daily decision making such as eating healthy and exercising. Thank you per usual for your video ❤

  • @therelaxationpalace3223
    @therelaxationpalace3223 Месяц назад +18

    I’m currently on my weight loss journey and everything she said is right.

  • @MysticButterfly22
    @MysticButterfly22 Месяц назад +36

    She always comes back and hits us with more amazing content. This conversation needs to be spoken out loud amongst black women and even obese women today. Ladies ignorance isn’t bliss; but knowledge is always power.
    ❤️💪🏽

  • @KevonnieElaine
    @KevonnieElaine Месяц назад +98

    I went to a concert a few months back and saw so many bw overweight. I’m not talking a few lbs here and there (10-30lbs) I’m talking about 80-100lbs!! If you want men to accept you the way you are then accept his wallet the way it is😭.

    • @ThePinkPantha21
      @ThePinkPantha21 Месяц назад +31

      Not even just the wallet. Protection all together. Men don't feel the need to protect a big woman. They unconsciously expect her to protect them.

    • @KevonnieElaine
      @KevonnieElaine Месяц назад +13

      @@ThePinkPantha21 Oop!!

    • @glowwithsandra
      @glowwithsandra Месяц назад +5

      @@ThePinkPantha21😂

    • @Lisette121
      @Lisette121 Месяц назад +3

      ​@@ThePinkPantha21👀

    • @alexlove31
      @alexlove31 Месяц назад +2

      @@ThePinkPantha21damn!

  • @amichel1873
    @amichel1873 Месяц назад +25

    I am a BW who went to PWI from primary to college & have worked in corporate America my entire career. WM have no mercy when it comes to weight & age. Most want a size four under 25. This is why their community struggles with bulimia & anorexia. They only relax the standards after they have been divorced & are showing signs of aging.

  • @kieshaarielle
    @kieshaarielle Месяц назад +9

    I absolutely *LOVED* that message from the first woman you played at the end of your video. She is hitting on facts. About 3 years ago (I was overweight) and all I did was eliminate processed foods and ate plant-based wholefoods and when I tell you I lost 11lbs in 11 weeks - pretty much 1lb per week. I was loving how my body looked and felt so much more confident in and outside of my clothes. Before I uses to hold in my tummy - but no more.

  • @9darshana
    @9darshana Месяц назад +63

    As a skinny person myself, I do indeed like being skinny. Do I go announcing it, nope but if she wants to, then more power to her. The only thing that was silly was when she said, "Skinny is her favorite thing to be". There are simply more important things to be that she could be favoriting. Does that make sense....ok. Lol!

    • @Geneicee8697
      @Geneicee8697 Месяц назад +11

      @@9darshana It was definitely a condescending tone for whatever reason 😬 Maybe she’s been facing comments about her weight loss who knows

    • @9darshana
      @9darshana Месяц назад +16

      @Geneicee8697 Yeah, it's just weird. No thin person says, "Skinny is my favorite thing to be". Maybe it is her favorite thing to be and I can't judge that it's just odd. My favorite thing to be is alive and healthy. My favorite thing to be is loved and adored...but I don't know, maybe that's just me. Lol!

    • @Geneicee8697
      @Geneicee8697 Месяц назад +7

      @@9darshana 😂 exactly maybe she meant her shape is her favorite thing about her appearance. It was definitely something going on there with how she said it but kudos to her! lol

    • @cherrytracy
      @cherrytracy Месяц назад +7

      Don’t take it that serious it’s TikTok and people where attacking her for being skinny and luxurious, the whole video isn’t response to some freak comments she received

  • @newdawn7586
    @newdawn7586 Месяц назад +28

    I'm a recently retired fitness professional and a BW. After 22 years in the business and many hours of continuing education and certs, I want to transition to RUclips because I have so much to offer BW. I've talked myself out of it because this is a sensitive subject and I've witnessed BW get so offended and shoot the messenger. It doesn't matter if you're coming from a good place and have knowledge of the subject. You can't help people who don't want your help themselves.

    • @Coachkryshondatorres
      @Coachkryshondatorres Месяц назад +5

      I say the same thing as a Licensed Health & Wealth Educator. We are here to help the willing.

    • @briana14333
      @briana14333 Месяц назад +8

      Please create your channel. The right audience will find you and appreciate you❣️

    • @bluphirre
      @bluphirre Месяц назад +5

      I completely agree. I have been into fitness for 20 years (weight lifting, competitions, half-marathon etc) and a cycling instructor for 4 years. I can count on one hand how many black women have attended my all my cycling classes combined. My classes are full of white women and men and I am so grateful for them. It’s sad not more black women take getting or staying fit as seriously as other women. It is a life style for me. Glad to see more fitness girlies out there. Love it! ❤

  • @auty888
    @auty888 Месяц назад +14

    Yes Chloe it’s true. I make way more money effortlessly in business too. When i was 70lbs heavier, it was a struggle in all areas.

  • @f3042
    @f3042 Месяц назад +36

    SlimmKim is fab. Girl is gorgeous and spoke the truth. 🤷🏾‍♀️

  • @tanishafreeman7098
    @tanishafreeman7098 Месяц назад +43

    Slim,thick or obese we all get done wrong... if the situation ain't for us

    • @2cut32handle
      @2cut32handle Месяц назад +22

      That doesn't negate the fact that women at a healthy weight will definitely be treated better by society & given more opportunities than those who are on the obese spectrum.

    • @J.R.noexcuses2013
      @J.R.noexcuses2013 Месяц назад

      ​@@2cut32handlePERIODT

    • @tanishafreeman7098
      @tanishafreeman7098 Месяц назад +1

      ​@@2cut32handleif you say so

    • @ZZealot-y3u
      @ZZealot-y3u Месяц назад +6

      Slim don't get done wrong NEARLY as much as chubby or obese. Just face the facts

    • @Jade-om5lz
      @Jade-om5lz Месяц назад +8

      @@ZZealot-y3u as somebody who’s been pretty small her entire life, this is simply not true 😂😂 yall need to be fr

  • @slandynoel99
    @slandynoel99 Месяц назад +6

    I’m not sure why we’re trying to cuddle folks. The truth is the truth. Being skinny and nicely fit are a must.

  • @F3f3333
    @F3f3333 Месяц назад +63

    To compare dark skin to weight smh

    • @DoveLady
      @DoveLady Месяц назад +20

      theyre both superficial qualifiers when choosing a mate.

    • @marig9236
      @marig9236 Месяц назад +28

      i noticed that too. there are fat in all races and skin colors.

    • @VirgosGroove3
      @VirgosGroove3 Месяц назад +14

      Right, he made it seem like dark skin just became cool, idk about that.

    • @caressaclark1042
      @caressaclark1042 Месяц назад +1

      Both can be a strike against you... whether dealing with black men, or white men. Being skinny has, and continues to help me, as I grow older. Being dark... not so much. Being dark does help my skin to age slower, but it also comes with negative stereotypes.❤

    • @shelliupshaw3405
      @shelliupshaw3405 Месяц назад +15

      The dark skin you don't have control over but you have control over you weight

  • @cookiesandpie4837
    @cookiesandpie4837 Месяц назад +21

    I have been on my weight loss journey for awhile now. Met a guy a few years back and he asked me to gain 200-300 more lbs cause he likes his women 500-600lbs! I said GTFOH and bounced

  • @truthhurtsohwell05
    @truthhurtsohwell05 Месяц назад +70

    I don’t date when I’m overweight! I am not going to put myself in a relationship where I know I won’t get the best.
    When I’m smaller, I’m prettier. It’s no lie. My perfect size(told to me by men of all races) is a5/6.
    I want to wear the hottest clothes. I don’t want to feel heavy. Fitness is my biggest struggle. It’s hard af to keep that weight off

    • @ThePinkPantha21
      @ThePinkPantha21 Месяц назад +9

      Love that you are honest with yourself! The best treatment is all I care about.

    • @janschild
      @janschild Месяц назад

      Exactly!

    • @gbrieannful
      @gbrieannful Месяц назад

      Yeah loosing weight and keeping it off is hard af I definitely agree with that statement.

  • @kaialabi7622
    @kaialabi7622 Месяц назад +3

    Excellent video! I love the first woman at the very end of the video who spoke about insulin resistance and reversin it.. She's spot on. I would just add that another effective way to reverse insulin resistance naturally is to do intermittent fasting. I mean long fasts 20+ hrs.. Movement, overhauling your diet, allowing your body to get into fat burning mode is essential. Try one meal a day and foods with healthy fats. Best

  • @TrialAndErrorCrafting
    @TrialAndErrorCrafting 18 дней назад +2

    I overheard my coworker who was a very conventionally attractive and charismatic man who also happened to be a personal trainer, give dating advice to a much younger male co-worker. They were commenting on clients' body shapes and types and my older coworker said, "Curvier woman thicker woman are meant to be smashed, not wifed. You may prefer thicker women in the sheets but, you should never walk them down the aisle. Your wife should be fit and a compliment to you. I was so appalled but, also not surprised. I do think most men believe this, if not all.

  • @shy_donut8307
    @shy_donut8307 Месяц назад +12

    I think it depends on where you’re at too. Like in the south men tend to prefer thicker women. I have more curves and a bigger bust than my friends so I’ve always fitted into the regional beauty standard. To my surprise they were insecure about being skinny even though that’s the universal standard but because of where we are it’s different.

  • @pamelasbutterflylife1312
    @pamelasbutterflylife1312 Месяц назад +10

    Chloe, thank you so much for this much needed topic on the state of our health as black women🌸!
    I lost 140 lbs naturally, totally for me. I was sick and tired of being sick and tired😭! I wanted to get off of my cane at 40 years old and be released from the pain in my left knee with arthritis! Weighing 275 lbs almost destroyed me!
    Now that I'm fit, healthy, and have energy, financially, well men from all different ethnicities want to date me❤! A whole new world opened up for me that I didn't have access to when I weighed 275 lbs.
    Typically when I walk into the store, "Jamal" will walk right by me. However, "Chad" is smiling and wants to engage with me! Caucasian men love lean dark-skinned black women🤎!
    Heal the broken little girl inside of you and know that your body doesn't have to be your prison🥺!
    Always remember that you are beautiful and DESERVE to be in a healthy mind, body, and spirit🧠💃🎇!

  • @butterscotch2086
    @butterscotch2086 Месяц назад +14

    Struggle love don’t discriminate tbh

    • @PrettyZ-qu6ws
      @PrettyZ-qu6ws Месяц назад +2

      I 100% disagree with her point

  • @TheEpiDoc
    @TheEpiDoc Месяц назад +13

    Yes, Chloe, I completely agree‼️

  • @rhondahopkins4366
    @rhondahopkins4366 Месяц назад +9

    I don't know why people always talking about weight. Now you have ladies talk about men weight. I always been thick never had a problem getting a man or keeping a man. You can be skinny beautiful and still don't have a man and still miserable.

    • @NebulaTide-z9h
      @NebulaTide-z9h 28 дней назад +1

      Exactly! It is like body weight narcissism.

  • @autumnc5888
    @autumnc5888 Месяц назад +5

    Great question. Thanks for continuing to spread your knowledge and feminine insight, Chloe!

  • @rosecheeks12
    @rosecheeks12 Месяц назад +28

    I agree with Chloe here. But let’s be real, how many skinny women are skinny because of diet and exercise alone? Genetics 🧬 plays a HUGE role!! Bigger girls with bad metabolisms have to work super hard, it’s mental gymnastics eating clean and exercising while not losing weight 😭😭 It’s not impossible but important to point out and get the help you need to heal your body ♥️

    • @jessicahitchens6926
      @jessicahitchens6926 Месяц назад +1

      No it's not genetics. That's 10%... Its lifestyle and your environmental factors. Your discipline your work ethic. Also your intellect. Knowledge is power.

    • @rosecheeks12
      @rosecheeks12 Месяц назад +1

      @ that’s true for heavier women. But for thinner women that’s not always the case. Many simply don’t have a desire to eat foods or don’t gain weight eating normal foods (ie not in a calorie deficit) I see this at work with a few of the ladies who are significantly smaller than average but do not diet nor exercise. I believe they are hurting themselves. Ultimately those bad choices catch up with them.

  • @Michaeleism
    @Michaeleism Месяц назад +8

    It's an incredible struggle to loose weight when you have hormonal imbalances and gland illness. I've been battling my weight due to thyroid issues etc..since I was 11 years old. I had friend who started randomly gaining weight. She had a tumor in her pineal gland that was causing issues with cushings, weight gain and sleep. Once the tumor was gone, the weight came OFF! Now nearing 40, it's become even harder for me personally to loose weight as well... Chloe, people don't want to admit but sometimes you DO have to push yourself to loose weight. And sometimes it may feel like you ARE dying when trying to loose weight. That's the simple truth..Obesity like you said IS a health liability!

    • @pamelasbutterflylife1312
      @pamelasbutterflylife1312 Месяц назад

      I am so sorry that you are struggling with your weight🥺! What do you think is the least that you can do that will help you reach your weight loss goals? I don't know what your diet looks like! Hmmmmm.....Have you tried to release the sugar and ultra processed foods for just a week to see if it changes your mood, brain fog, and energy level🤔? How are you sleeping at night? A lack of quality sleep can trigger raised cortisol levels, which signals stress in the body, which will cause you to hold on to unwanted weight! How is your water intake?

  • @kathyberal5623
    @kathyberal5623 Месяц назад +5

    “Loose the wait”…. And then come back and watch this video again.

  • @BlueRoveer
    @BlueRoveer Месяц назад +6

    The world needs more chloes you are truly a magical gem ❤❤❤❤

  • @newmooninlibra
    @newmooninlibra Месяц назад +11

    As someone who was 342lbs before my fitness journey,(Currently 265) i will say it's been a difference ,just in that comparison alone.I have a ways to go,but i will say,i do get approached more than usual now.Oddly enough by younger guys,29,30,31 (Too young for me)😂 I'm a youthful 40 and they always assume I'm closer to their age or a little older,can't wait to reach goal.I've prioritize my gym 90 mins 5 days a week.eating better,taking Collagen,pampering myself,skin care,fragrances,make up,facials,pedicures,really investing in me,for me.
    I'm definitely putting my best self forward ❤ and will only accept whats meant for me

    • @pamelasbutterflylife1312
      @pamelasbutterflylife1312 Месяц назад +2

      Oh wow🥰! A million and one congratulations 🌹♥️! That is awesome! I know that you look amazing, but more importantly, you feel good in your body🌸! I'm so happy for you🦋!

    • @Geneicee8697
      @Geneicee8697 Месяц назад

      @@newmooninlibra ♥️♥️♥️🫶🏾

    • @newmooninlibra
      @newmooninlibra Месяц назад +1

      @@pamelasbutterflylife1312 😊 Thank you so very much🥰

  • @WomanlyWise1
    @WomanlyWise1 Месяц назад +9

    Excellent Commentary ❤️.

  • @Beautybyiasia
    @Beautybyiasia Месяц назад +14

    Skinny has always been in. That will never change. Being curvy was only in because white women were trying to go that route. Now they are back to wanting to be slim. I just keep with my own body and health. We’ve been having this same conversation for decades.

  • @Pretty_confident
    @Pretty_confident Месяц назад +1

    Thank you Chloe for continuously telling the hard truth.

  • @shec9686
    @shec9686 Месяц назад +20

    I think it can also depend on how overweight a woman is, the weight distribution, the beauty of the face and the personality…bc I have a friend that is extremely beautiful in the face. she has a nice shape and she has a great personality. She’s like 300 at least and she gets a plethora of men of all races with resources. But I do agree that overall skinnier women are top pick for more well todo men.

  • @megan7767
    @megan7767 Месяц назад +2

    one of my main concerns about us black women is the fear of getting our hair ‘messed up’ by exercising, sweating in the sauna etc. the lace fronts with the glue makes you nottt want to workout & i can speak from past experience. all i’m saying is braid your hair or please get the wigs you can take on and off at night. this is a game changer. do not be afraid to step away from vanity & focus on your fitness. i lost 67 lbs within the last two years. this is not coming from someone who did not do it. i still have goals but my hair is no longer my biggest issue. the reward is greater than a lace front hair style. i promise you.

  • @Andrianicoledaily
    @Andrianicoledaily Месяц назад +18

    The cheap lash close up is killing me 😅 idk why it’s making me chuckle

  • @Lovejoyful606
    @Lovejoyful606 Месяц назад +16

    I rebuke bread in the name of Green leafy vegetables!❤

  • @tyilliasmw4796
    @tyilliasmw4796 Месяц назад +7

    80 % what we eat 20 % pilates or yoga

  • @nataliaonaire
    @nataliaonaire Месяц назад +1

    Adrenal body is a thing 🤐
    This is an interesting topic. I think a lot of women minimize the impact of stress/anxiety on weight accumulation.
    Stress impacts sleep, which also impacts metabolism... Leading to unnecessary weight accumulation.
    Struggle induces stress... Struggle 'love'... Hmm

  • @alwaysaccurate8725
    @alwaysaccurate8725 Месяц назад +3

    Thank You for the glucose informational clip.

  • @deboraha4908
    @deboraha4908 Месяц назад +2

    Thank you . This conversation helped me.

  • @Headnotthetail2
    @Headnotthetail2 Месяц назад +6

    I’m on a mission to lose 100 pounds.These videos are so informative

  • @29_Other_things
    @29_Other_things Месяц назад +2

    What i will say is a high value man will also see you beyond your weight. From my experience when i first my husband i was 51 kgs . Im 5'2 so i was small. 2 years ago i got pregnant and that pregnancy ended in a miscarriage. I was very much depressed i gained 20kgs . Only 8 months ago i started ro focus on myself again and have lost 12kgs of the 20kgs so far . My Husband has been so supportive the whole time

  • @jamfabulous1235
    @jamfabulous1235 Месяц назад +3

    We do have to take accountability and make time to prioritize eating healthier and working out

  • @s.e.9091
    @s.e.9091 Месяц назад +22

    This girl slim Kim said being skinny is all she thinks about. I’m no expert but that sounds unhealthy for the mind 🙏🏽

    • @2cut32handle
      @2cut32handle Месяц назад +2

      Calm down, I'm sure she was being sarcastic

  • @colleenmariet
    @colleenmariet Месяц назад +14

    My petty why is to be a menace to these men 😊

  • @joanneclaire1045
    @joanneclaire1045 Месяц назад +11

    If a man cant love you as you are then thats not real love

  • @signedlolablue
    @signedlolablue Месяц назад

    Thank you for the Content at the end from the medical student. Very enlightening for me. ❤❤❤❤👍🏾

  • @kloves3910
    @kloves3910 Месяц назад +3

    Im thin and i prefer to be. The narrative for bw is...we r loud argumentative, sassy, and hella thick. Thats not my narrative. I despise living in a world where a narrative proceeds me. However i arrive slim, well spoken, and soft. B/c i deserve to be in the same spaces as any1 else. To achieve that u must do the work!!! Even working out!! Im usually the only brown girl at the gym, yoga class spin class. We need to encourage one another to elevate our lives with working out a moderate to clean diet indulging here and there. B/c life will come thru for ya...just look at Eve the rapper. Classy, has stayed in shape not problematic...look who she snagged...her hubby is a billionaire. I would rather indulge in life than indulge in plate after plate of food

  • @wendym3654
    @wendym3654 Месяц назад +13

    I’m a uk size 8 wouldn’t have it any other way … I work hard at the gym , eat clean and intermittent fast

  • @forevermoss4007
    @forevermoss4007 Месяц назад +1

    The last statement made is harsh reality....and can be applied in all aspects in this life. Perspective is everything.

  • @Divamuseicon
    @Divamuseicon Месяц назад +19

    If we are being honest, the truth about skinny is that, a lot of people are not skinny. Especially in America, with the average person in US overweight.
    So if more women were to become skinny, and skinny became the average the privileges women are getting for not being “average” would disappear. As well as, constantly shifting beauty standards make this a thing anyway.
    Example: all these “I love being skinny” and “be skinny for skinny privilege” videos were NOT existing at the same time as the BBL movement. I recall many skinny women drinking that weight gain drink and overeating for the surgery. Why? Because Those were the women getting preferential treatment.
    I wouldn’t advocate any woman attempt to be skinny for privilege cause the truth is, it’s FLEETING. Lose weight for yourself. Because men aren’t treating women better because they are skinny, they treat women better because the women feel better. These feelings make women make men meet their standards, not their figures.

  • @25mahoro
    @25mahoro Месяц назад

    Merry Christmas Chloe 🥰 Please do share more about weight in the hypergamous journey

    • @TheNewFeminine
      @TheNewFeminine  Месяц назад +1

      Already did. Weight loss videos are behind a paywall.💄

  • @geegeesofly2000
    @geegeesofly2000 Месяц назад +13

    The one's encouraging to stay over weight either want company or a reminder of what they never want to look like. Loosing weight and keeping as fit as possible is soooo worth it not just for your self confidence but also your health and livelyhood.

  • @taryswilson1227
    @taryswilson1227 Месяц назад +14

    Well i lost weight getting rid of a man i had no reason dating

  • @xbunnies769
    @xbunnies769 Месяц назад +22

    As a woman who is slim, I wouldn’t change it for the world. Especially considering that I prefer dating Chads.

  • @claricelyles8398
    @claricelyles8398 Месяц назад +47

    The young woman at 2:15 gives anorexia. She says her favourite thing to be is skinny and it's her fav protect fear to not be. She says it's all she thinks about. It's important to be healthy, not to have an obsession with skinny. Skinny is not necessarily, fit. Fit and toned is not necessarily skinny. It's important, the words we use and the things we say and "obsess" about.

    • @F3f3333
      @F3f3333 Месяц назад

      99% of bigger are more unhealthy they pass away at higher rates from cardiovascular diseases! A mass amount of skinny people aren't dying from being skinny!! Y'all will say anything vs stop eating and working out

    • @J.R.noexcuses2013
      @J.R.noexcuses2013 Месяц назад +13

      But that's her choice to feel that way. I like being slim as well.... Yall are upset with her because she said it OUT LOUD AND PROUD!!! And PLENTY OF SLIM/SKINNY WOMEN AGREE WITH HER!!

    • @allMinabe
      @allMinabe Месяц назад +4

      True she used the same terms young girls that I know used that had eating disorders. Obesity on the rise doesn't mean anorexia disappeared.

    • @SaffariRose
      @SaffariRose Месяц назад

      It sounds like a sad life. So there really isn't anything else outside of a body that WILL change with age for you to hold on to, be obsessed with, be proud of? Wouldn't be me.