Get the Respect in Your Relationships You Deserve With This One Tip - Terri Cole
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- Опубликовано: 24 июл 2024
- Are there people in your life who don’t respect your boundaries?
People you can’t talk true around, who use your words against you later?
People who don’t support what is best for you?
People who take and take, leaving you drained?
If you are nodding your head, you might need more discernment when it comes to who has access to you, and how much.
In this episode, I am covering what discernment is, why being discerning with the people in our life is important, how to practice discernment, and how discernment can improve the quality of your life and your relationships.
Grab the guide for this episode here: www.terricole.com/get-the-res...
Time Stamps
0:00 - Introduction
2:05 - What is discernment?
3:35 - Differentiating preferences, limits, deal-breakers
5:40 - Example of a deal-breaker
7:40 - Judgment vs discernment
9:29 - Discerning what is healthy/unhealthy
11:34 - Discernment about how much we share
15:07 - 5 tips to become more discerning
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About Terri Cole
Terri Cole is a licensed psychotherapist, global relationship and empowerment expert, and the author of Boundary Boss-The Essential Guide to Talk True, Be Seen and (Finally) Live Free.
For over two decades, Terri has worked with a diverse group of clients that includes everyone from stay-at-home moms to celebrities and Fortune 500 CEOs.
She has a gift for making complex psychological concepts accessible and actionable so that clients and students achieve sustainable change. She inspires over 450,000 people weekly through her blog, social media platform, signature courses, and her popular podcast, The Terri Cole Show. For more, see www.terricole.com/
Connect With Me
Instagram: terricole.com/ig
Community: terricole.com/fbg
TC's VIPs: terricole.com/membership
Newsletter: terricole.com/newsletter
Resources
Boundary Boss Book: amzn.to/44DZID9
The Boundary Boss Workbook: amzn.to/3Ra7CRU
Insight Timer: insig.ht/cpKnbJB4KDb (I have a bunch of free meditations on here and love this app!)
BetterHelp: betterhelp.com/terricole
I’m not currently taking any new one-on-one therapy or coaching clients, but highly recommend using BetterHelp to find a therapist that fits your needs. As a team, we have fully vetted BetterHelp's resources.
www.terricole.com/gethelp/ -- If you are in a crisis or any other person may be in danger the resources on this page can provide you with immediate help.
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#terricoleshow #discernment #boundariesarehealthy
Let me know: do you need to be more discerning in any areas of your life? How might doing so uplevel your relationships? Or your relationship to yourself? I want to know your thoughts! Don't forget to download the guide here: www.terricole.com/get-the-respect-you-deserve-in-your-relationships-guide
I always set boundaries and stuck to them if someone doesn’t like it then bye bye 😊
Intimacy - into me you see....we have to know who we are and our deal breakers and boundaries as you say before we can let anyone else "see" who we are. And...if we have been abused, gaslit, etc.we need to know who we are first because people will try to tell us who we are. Thank you very much for all your work.
Thank you for sharing ❤️
“I don’t really give a shit” about approval ❤
I wish I had your book when I was a teenager...how different my life would have been..thank you Teri...I am truly grateful for you ❤️
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Ive been through relationship with a man who is also a long time friend where I dated the narcissist for many years where Im trying to heal, I loved him way too much, cared too much. He was unwilling to compromise and work on himself and get needed therapy.
Teri Cole, the information you are sharing on this channel is reaching me, so helpful and empowering.
I'm so glad my content has been helpful ❤️
Thanks Terri this means so much. For a chronic people pleaser with absolute no boundaries your guidance helps me so much. With boundaries i am noticing a lot of people i grew up with not happy with my distance. It almost seems they miss the control but my head feels lighter having to constantly rescue others mostly no one wants the advice.
I am so glad my videos have been helpful for you ❤️
@@gloriavis then why Ru on this channel?
Thanks so much Terri❤ I have just asked a man I have been getting to know about his opinion of male-female friendships as this has caused me pain in the past.
He has a female friend whom he calls almost every day and stays overnight at her place sometimes. For me it’s too much of an emotional closeness but I got more concerned about his response, ‘if it’s a dealbreaker for you, then end this. It’s your decision. My friends are important. You are jealous’. He is 50, am 43. Hm, my way or the high way thinking is not something I appreciate. I asked him about possible solutions/ setting new boundaries but he said it was my problem. In the past I would have stayed, now I feel both of us should be open to finding a solution, not just me. Again, thank you for your thoughts✨
You're so welcome ❤️ If you haven't watched this video I did on boundaries and control, you might want to as it sounds like it could help, too: ruclips.net/video/8sBKq8cRs78/видео.html
Thank yourself for dodging the bullet! Great job in knowing who you are and what are acceptable boundaries! 😍
Excellent video, Terri. Gratitude ❤
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the timing of this is spooky because it resonates so deeply with what im going through right now. thank you, i really needed to hear this
I am so glad it resonated for you ❤️
Discerning what is Normal
You absolutely got a balloon drop on the "if you don't respect somebody, who gives a shit what they think about you"! Bummer when it's your kid. Also devastating when you have to acknowledge that although you REALLY paid attention to how you raised your child, being conscious and really committed to doing it BETTER, showing up, and being there, (and no revolving door of replacement "fathers"), then they turn out to be a seemingly barely related, unconscious person that takes out ALL of their frustration about the parent that wasn't there, even when they are an adult. Wow, that's a very confusing kick in the gut that pretty much eviscerates.
I am witnessing you with so much compassion ❤️
I have witnessed this kind of behaviour to one other parent or both, and I must say is quite sad and disturbing~😔
Good on you for trying to be BETTER~💕
@@moen4645 thank you. That actually helps me feel seen. Not alone in the world with an adult child wolf.
@@flyingcheff...I reckon you are not alone on this~💜
“Not everybody has to be in your VIP section!”- Terri Cole…mic drop 🎤 😂❤ love you! From a random 36 year old recovering people-pleaser in California 😊 I appreciate your insight so much!! 🎉 🩷
You know it! And I am cheering you on 💕 Thanks for leaving this comment xo
Discernment can come as a gift as Christans believe. King David married Abigail because she was discerning. He loved the Abigail, also he understood he could get away better from his enemies with her as a wife.
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I Have formerly read and heard, “Not everyone deserves to be in your life.” I Have also heard people comment (something like) that the five people you spend most of your time with determine the kind of person you become. Your elaboration of the first comment makes this comment explicit. I also like that you made a distinction between judging another and exercising discernment. I will stop here and just say that you shared many insights in this video.
I am so glad it was helpful, Beverly 💕 Thanks for sharing your takeaways!
Hi I'm Wendi , I've gotten a lot from your content! Appreciate your authentic insight
Well hello there, Wendi! Thanks for taking the time to share that- so glad my content is helping you ❤️
My name is Richard, I appreciate your advice, I am soo glad that we have people that care about the quality of life.
Answer to the 1st 2nd 3rd question: neither
I appreciate this information
Wonderful video .. I love your ‘realness’ .. thank you for another great video 🙂
Thank you for being here!
Great Terri - thanks so much & I’m opening up your new Boundary Boss Wkbook! 🙌 PS- the Uncle Bob examples are helpful & kinda crack me up! No thx & Buh Bye Uncle Bob 😂
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Wonderfully helpful, Terri! Thank you so, so much!
So glad it was helpful! ❤️
This content is an eye opener
Perfect timing, I did the automatic yes - thought I had grown past that but I realise I hadn’t cultivate the internal space of late to respond rather than react. 🙏
It can be a challenge to overcome when you've been conditioned to say yes for so long. Good on you for noticing ❤️
Teri Cole, Im new to your channel, very insightful and empowering.
Thank you for creating this episode & learning Terri.
So interesting but trying to think through and understand everything in this content. 😊🌸
The download guide for revision is so
useful...thank you~thank you~
I'm so glad the guide is useful for you, and that you enjoyed this episode ❤️❤️
Terri!! Thank you for sharing the Good Friend or Frenemy Cheat Sheet. I downloaded it and it has help me realize who is not making me happy in the friendship. By the way, same here!! When i was 17, I did not know the meaning of frenemies, although I encountered one girl who is 7 years older than me. I kept wondering Oh my gosh, why does she keep looking jealous and pouchy lips when I dress with more stylish clothes or more accessories. I noticed she competing against me in Church the next Sunday. And I was wondering Uh why? That friend was happy when I was down and depressed but when I am happy and risen with a smile, she becomes unhappy and inferior to see me that way. After hearing your video and reading your downloads, now i know that person has a name-Frenemy. Take care. God bless!! Please continue uploading videos. It helps a lot!!🙂
I am so glad the cheat sheet helped you- thank you for taking the time to let me know. I appreciate you ❤️❤️
Hi Terri! Thanks for creating awareness in such important and complex topics. Hugs from Madeira island.
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ThankYou for raising that deal breaker of healthy life style for the partner.Important to me too.
Right on!
excellent info…Thanks Terri💜
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Empowerment shared on this channel🎉
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Thank you❤
You're so welcome ❤️
Thank you Terri. Your content is like a concentrated dose of wisdom. I loved your Boundary Boss book. I need to listen to it at least 2 more times so I can remember the content to put it into practice. Thank you.
Thank you for being here, Esther ❤️❤️
Great content ❤ Luv your Work 🎉
Thank you, I appreciate you being here ❤️
Extremely helpful, thanks so much!
So glad to hear it, Danielle! ❤️
ı wish you publish it as a turkish too.
yes, i do think that's gross. if a male partner told me i had to keep my body a certain way i would lose my shit at them.
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Thank you, great timing 🤍
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