I read that book in my 20s, it’s a little outdated now. It was a good book for what it was but trust me your mindset in your 20’s is going to shift as soon as you’re approaching 30. If you think you’ll have life figured out in your 20s, is quite comical. Every single decade, you will enter a new phase and a shift. My only advice is that you save in your 20s, work smarter not harder (no hustle culture) because your body will not function the same as you get older. I’ve learn to read books and take what I can from them but absolutely no book can tell you how your life experiences will be. After all we are not God.
I completely agree that all books should be take as an information source from which to pick and chose what you take away. In fact I did a whole video on that last year. I’m always so curious as to when advice or trying to make decisions towards a goal is considered “having it all figured out”. That seems to be a common theme in some of the comments under this video. This video nor the book in my opinion is about having it all figured out. I took it as explore, enjoy but be empowered to make decisions. Do things that enrich you and will allow you to navigate through social and career spaces; be cautious of social media; and don’t be paralysed by the thought of forever. I like your addition of working smarter a lot though- it’s a major key! Thank you for your input 😊
You made some good points but when you get in your 30s, let’s see if your opinions change. I had similar opinions at 25. I’m 33 and your 30s are way better than your 20s. You don’t need to have your life together by 30 and starting your career after 25 isn’t “late”.
In all honesty I’m not sure it’s about either being “better” fundamentally. They’re different life stages with different opportunities and potential lows. The data suggest the 20s are a critical period for some outcomes. To think the quality of your 30s would not be influenced by the decisions in your 20s would be nonsensical. This video is not about having your life together but instead things to consider whilst navigating an interesting period of one’s life. I actually think a lot of this applies to any stage of life. Thank you for your input.
I turn 33 this year and I agree with you! There are great points made in this video ❤️ I definitely could have used this advice when I was younger but everything started flourishing in my 30’s. The mistakes and sacrifices I made in my 20’s set me up for success in my 30’s
Yeah starting your career after 25 is most definitely not late at ALL. Like if anything that’s when it makes the most sense to start a real career bc you have years of your 20’s left till your 30…. 25 26 & 27 for careers makes a lot of sense. Especially when there’s so many options out there now
I love this. I’m 27 and “wasted” my early twenties being married only to end up cheated on and now divorced with a child. I put school on hold trying to hold on to my marriage and family. I’m going to get my bachelors degree now. Even if you don’t make all the right moves, it’s never too late until your dead lol. Keep striving and if you can take advantage of this advice, please do so! Great content!
You did what you thought was best and it didn’t work as expected, that’s life! Completely agree and I hope the rest of your 20s and beyond is prosperous and full of opportunities ❤️
I’ll be 30 on Saturday😂 I could have been more selfish and focused. Took more chances. Waited to have my kids. As your disclaimer stated everyone has a different path. BUT if you can realize/ learn things sooner rather than later…that’s always better👍🏽
Happy birthday for Saturday! I appreciate your honesty and willingness to share. I agree we don’t always get it right but the sooner we can learn things the better ❤️
I embarrassingly failed everything I touched in my 20s. Going to university was a mistake for me. And then, when I finally got a degree to be a nurse at 25, my parent died and I've spent the last four years of my 20s depressed. Not to mention, the pandemic robbed us of at least 2 years. It's been a mess. I'll be 30 in November, and I'm really sad about it. Financially, I'm not prepared and I have no 5 year plan anymore. I haven't learned or succeeded enough for the amount of years I've spent on this Earth.
One thing that has greatly changed is the amount of time we spend in school. If you're not from a wealthy family for example, you finish uni between 22 and 24. You only gain full independence at around 25. During which time you're working in a starter career position. Ofcourse that's the time you're enjoying your independence and financial freedom- at last! Traveling, going out, and having fun with your friends- rightfully so especially if you worked hard in school, didn't have much growing up etc. Before you know it, you're 27 without saving or just enough to get you by and at this time you realize you have to go back to school to attain another degree or in order to progress in your career or find another job. Let's say all that is done by 28 then you start thinking about seriously dating but your finances aren't there yet....lol I can go on and on but it's tough and besides, most people in their 20s aren't mature enough to make the decisions or take on the responsibilities society expects us to automatically assume. We need our carefree 20s to experience life and try things to know what we like or don't, what we are good at etc. I wish the 20s were for 20 yrs not 10 though 🤣🤣🤣. Great video.
That's a good point about education being extended into our early 20s and having a knock-on effect! I'm not sure I completely agree with the timeline about only getting serious about finances or dating at 28. One of my favourite quotes that I mentioned from the book was about taking the time to explore in your 20s but having the nerve to make commitments and decisions. I don't think the 20s are about having it all figured out but I'm not team carefree until you hit 30, that has repercussions for both dating/reproduction and finances which we're just really seeing the effect of. Ultimately the book is really offering good life advice for people in their 20s such as doing things that enrich your character, networking, being cautious of the effects of social media and shoulds, etc. I'd hope anyone in their 20s (or any other period of their life) listening takes the things they feel may be useful away and leaves anything that doesn't resonate. Thank you so much for your feedback and contribution to the discussion ❤️
@@AdamaLorna the reason why the finances won't add up is because most people in their early 20s are in entry level positions that don't pay much. If you're from an African or black household, in addition to taking care of yourself in this extremely expensive landscape, you have family obligations too. Some early to mid 20 yr olds can be lucky enough to get well paying jobs but for most of those jobs, 5yr+ work experience is needed which most 20yr olds dont have. Then there's an assumption that everyone gets a job right away from school. Depending on where you live, it could take awhile. With the pandemic for example, some people had to search for almost 2yrs to find jobs in their field. Being connected to people who are or friends of gatekeepers in the job sector does help. Lets not even forget the barrier when you're black or an immigrant. Moving for work or school does set people back. When you move especially from low income to developed countries, your academic qualifications do not matter there. You literally start from the bottom with minimum wage jobs. Even after you graduate, there's a chance you won't get a good paying job before you get your residency status by that time, you're in your late 20s or 30s. It all depends though. People have different paths in life but the biggest factor that helps people bypass most of these hurdles is privilege. Race, beauty, class, citizenship, connections, intelligence etc. The average people don't have it easy. The economy has made it so much harder too.
@@AdamaLorna for women marrying early could negativity impact your career too since you may spend those early years having children and catering to them.
I resonate with this experience so much. I spent my 20’s discovering myself and who I am. I was poor but also came from a very abusive household so my 20’s were just for me to be able to live my life. I’m 29 this year going on 30 and doing a career changer and thinking about taking school as far as I can this time. And that’s with a previous bachelor’s degree already! But I think it’s so worth it. If I don’t do it now, I’ll be 30 or 40 anyways and not having anything to show for it. I feel like all the experiences of my 20’s let me live out my dreams and selfish wishes. It’s time to grow up. I don’t regret it at all. Maybe just wish I was a little more mature earlier lol.
This is interesting thanks for sharing awesome tips sis! I'm 32, financially free and currently growing a solid retirement plan. It takes a positive and consistency to learn new things, unlearn the old habits ms Important to get a mentor/coach to lead you all the way. It's great to start young too!
@@gracedaniels6172 personally I think 1m is the goal to overcome inflation and having them in an inv estment p ortfolio is a perfect plan. I'm half way to my goal 😊
@@louis-freddieceaser8811 yeah. Fees and commissions are factors to look at in search for financial advisers. There’s financial experts out there who do not look at their fees but the impact and intrinsic value they bring along to you no matter how little you want to start. I’m glad I had one guide me start my financial journey
I’m in my late 20’s and didn’t get a 20’s. I left my only abusive family (narcisstic mother dynamic) at 18 and ended up stuck in hostels and benefits system in the UK. If you work too many hours your rent becomes unreasonable so your caught in the poverty benefits trap. I didn’t get a 20’s due to my childhood trauma that I’ve only just got able a decent therapist now 😢 So I guess my 30’s hopefully will be my time to live. Thank God I’ve never wanted children otherwise I’d feel a lot worse about my current situation.
Same for me, left my family at 23 years old. Felt like the most alone at that point. But I got myself into therapy and found better people to support my healing. Turned 25 this august and ive been very lucky. I have a good job and a lot more freedom now more than ever.
A big part of making a lot of money and having a successful life is being an effective communicator which is something that you are. You and a lot of self help RUclipsrs have a good way with your words. Having a good command of words or ‘chat’ can get you into places.
I agree, communication is perhaps one of the most important tools one can have at their hand for life in general and specifically for career progression. Thank you!
I just turned 23 years old and with the past of the years I feel more stuck, I don't have a job, I don't have a career and everyday when I wake up I feel more depressed, sometimes I think I'm just I failure without any goals or dreams to achieve until the point where I ask myself what's the purpose of my life, I got married at 22 years old and I am in love with my husband however I am not happy with my own life. I wish I can get my stuff together in a few years and I pray to God to be in a better place later on ♥️ thank you so much for your advice.
You’re so young in the grand scheme and as long as you really WANT a different life then you can make it. Get your head in the game. I mean hell even if you decided this at 28 you’d still have 2 & a half years to change your path/life and still be on time if you worked hard enough. But all in all find balance in getting what you really want but also enjoying your 20’s. It’s possible
I just turned 30 and although I’m in a comfortable place in life, Im definitely not where I want to be. I wasted a lot of time from 19 -25 that I could of leveraged to be closer to my goals now. However, I recognize that Im still young so I’m going to go hard these next 5 years 💪🏼
Best attitude to have! We all live and learn but the arrow of time points forward so we gotta keep pushing towards our goals. Hope you have a great next 5 years ❤️
At the age of 21 I said I wanted to do my Masters before 30, at 28 I am in the application process with no financial support but just hope. Pray for me.
I like all the advice Adama gave but everyone's journey is different had my 1st child at 17 and 2nd child at 27 never went to college or Uni at 30 packed my things and moved to Ghana for a year and bought land and enjoyed also went from making 30k a year to 85k in one year.. my journey in life has been amazing don't think you have to do life the traditional way the sky is the limit and I'm an AA
Thank you Sylvia! You're right everyone's journey is different, no advice or recommendations will ever apply to every person and some people excel via very different paths. We do have to be realistic about generalities though. I don't think these points are about being 'traditional' but are just potentially useful things to consider if you want to accelerate your career growth and general life path. I appreciate you sharing your journey ❤️
I’m 22 and I just went out and bought this book today. I’ve started it and I’m enjoying it so far. I feel like it’s exactly what I need to hear right now.
You have a head start on a lot of people if you consider the points raised in the book! I'm glad you're enjoying it and I hope your 20s are prosperous and enjoyable!
Not sure about this video. I think in theory it makes sense but I also think it’s quite triggering for people in their 30’s who didn’t have their 20’s all figured out. Speaking as someone in the 30’s it’s not over at all. You can have fun in 20’s not have it all figured out as many of us haven’t and then focus in your 30’s. I’d love you to revisit this video when your 34 Adama to see your thoughts.
I appreciate your feedback on the video! I understand that the realisation of time passing can be triggering but I don't think thats reason enough to not have an open conversation with those who are in their 20s and still have the time to make the most out of it, elders have done this since the beginning of time. By no means do I think once you turn 30 life suddenly implodes, but time and age are a reality of the physical world. I don't agree that the 20s should just be for 'fun'. I think its a time to explore meaningfully and start to make intentional decisions for your future but that doesn't equal having it all figured out. Building identity capital, networking, being cautious of social media and building a customised life in your 20s seems like pretty solid things to consider but I appreciate that those in their 30s may disagree. Thank you for bringing your perspective to the conversation! ❤️
It's not about being triggering. It's about being disenpowering. Everytime someone associates enpowerment with leveraging their age in society, it makes it inherently disenpowering for someone else who is younger or old. I have no problem with it.....but as a part of my conscious deciding of I wanted to be in my 20s, I decided I didn't want to enable these ideas in the culture. :)
Hey Jean, thats an interesting take. I don't think triggered and disempowered are mutually exclusive. The emotion/feeling triggered may very well be disempowerment though, I agree with you. Age is an immutable fact. I'm not quite sure what ideas in the culture you're referring to. Would you not advise people in their 20s to consider some of the points made or is it more the fact that you believe one can do all of this in their 30s and achieve the same thing as someone who started doing these things in their 20s? Genuine question btw as I'm interested on what parts you reject/ are not keen on enabling 😊
@@AdamaLorna To be honest I didn't watch your video. So I'm not critiquing it. It may sound flippant or hypocritical, but I tend to judge base on title and some comments before I watch many youtube videos, and I knew from the title it'd probably be something I don't agree with. I replied to lalalou because I tend to empathize with people for whom the ageist equation isn't verry favourable. So I was just adding my two cents to what lalalou was talking about :) When I mentioned enabling, I meant ageism of any kind. For me the society of the future sees people for their soul first and age second (or not at all, for the most part)...and whether or not you succeed in leveraging your age in a positive way....is largely a function of how many blocks you have to your freedom and happiness at any one age. So someone who at 25 is turning around in bed with flashbacks of a traumatic experience, with no money or family support.........versus someone with a totally different experience at that age.........will obviously have a very different lifeplan. So it's really for me a broad thing. I'm the kind of guy that likes to address the root cause of these fears and ways of "enpowering" yourself. But I'm super aware of the fact it's done in a societal context....that is usually extremely biased. I don't like it. And I'm also first and foremost about validating people's experience ... like the trauma example I gave.....rather than help people succeed within the system. My point is....timesensitive advice or information is not something I feel is enpowering in most cases. I'm not dismissing your ideas (since I didn't watch the video :D) but on principle I'm pretty much against anything that draws on societal fears to move the individual's life forward..or even aknowledges age biases within societies as realiies one has to consider. And I speak as someone who is close to being 36 and who has missed many chances in terms of timing. But if I didn't....and I was now experiencing the benefit of having done it the "right" or "responsible" or "proactively sensible" way....I'd probably have less empathy for everyone else who did things in the "wrong timing". I'm here to destroy social BS....and wanna help people be MORE inclsuive...and pay LESS attention or respect to our social molds. OTHERWISE I am going to enable things I don't like. And most of these strategies are slightly fear-based at the subcosncious core....the fear of missing out etc. I don't want that timeline for planet Earth :)
It's near impossible for me to meaningfully engage in this discussion given I wouldn't be defending my position, as you haven't watched my video. I'd be instead debating what you assume I'm conveying based on my title/thumbnail (which is of course your right to do). Being aware of age and the passage of time is not inherently ageist. However, I stand by your right to your opinion even if I don't agree 😊
hey, just a quick disclaimer. I know I'm in my mid-20s and not trying to act like I've solved all the riddles of life but I found a lot of these points in the book reflected through both statistics and anecdotal evidence from my own life and those that I know. This path is of course not the case for everyone and we will always find exceptions to general statements. I'd love to hear your thoughts on the book summary and how that matches up with your reality ❤
To be honest the fact your helping people guiding them as best you can about their 20’s is brilliant I think I wish I had found you sooner and always remember that you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink Thank you for this channel as I wasted most of my twenties which I regret
I'll be 28 at the start of the year, and I fell guilty to wanting to see my life as an impressive outcome. I wasnt able to take pics of my graduation, so I felt like I missed my shine. My job is industry relevant but the pay is subpar. I have business ideas that are just on paper, and I felt like if I don't get it done by 30 it'll never happen. I'm letting go of those ideas that life has to stay this way. I'm learning not to let fear of failure hold me back and use my current position to network and align with my interests career goals of serving the community in financial education, of writing my own blog and candlemaking. Great video as always💖
Thank you for being so open! Its definitely not over, its just that every year is precious including your 20s, life doesn't stop at 30 though! All those things sound like really interesting pursuits and I wish you the best in your journey 💕
If you have a great connection to your family you should definitely spend a lot of time with them in your 20s. I grew up with my parents, grandparents and great grandma in the house and now only live 5 min away. My grandparents won’t live forever I wanna spend a lot of time with them and it’s so worth it! Building connections with your loved ones no matter if family or friends is the absolute most important thing to me. Create unforgettable memories, those are like a goldmine to happiness and will last you forever. A career will never fulfill you like your loved ones do! Loved your video tho, a career is also very important and can bring fulfillment but I think we shouldn’t rely on this so much cause in the end it’s just a way how our society works, human connection is ever lasting in all societal forms.
I'm in my early 20's and already feel so pressured of being "behind" based on what I see my friends and family accomplish on social media. I think I'll get this book because you've covered almost all my self doubts i've been having & this was refreshing to hear, thank you!
I felt that which is why I haven’t been on ig for months. Seeing people your age and maybe even younger appear to be living this amazing lifestyle when you’re not where you want to be can def affect your self esteem but then I always have to remember that there’s always a story behind a picture and a lot of people can fake it for the gram and comparing myself won’t do anything for me. Once you limit your usage of social media it really does bring a sense of peace of mind😌
@@chanela.7786 Yesss! I've slowly been doing this as well & although I sometimes get the "fear of missing out" (aka FOMO), it's been so helpful for me 👏 thank you for the kind words of advice 😊
Its so easy to feel like that, I have to be careful on social media and take breaks too! I'm glad the video may have eased some doubts and concerns you had! Completely agree with Chanel ❤️
You can set up your life at any age, it’s all about will power not age. Sure, it’s easier in your 20s, but let’s be honest here, many people use their 20s to experiment, many of us aren’t really sure of what we want at that age, as we get older, our priorities get clearer. Time has a big factor too, in the 60s, women were wives and mothers in their early 20s, and we all know how that worked out for the family relationships. You can’t rush experience, this obsession with success in the 20s is just a part of society’s infatuation with making everyone feel like life ends as soon as your 20s are over. Heck, successful marriages with healthy relationships occur when partners are older. I rest my case.
I turned 20 in January and I started to look at videos about being in your 20s. I did enjoy the video and I gave me a bit more insight in terms of career because that was mostly my main focus going into the new year. Thanks for that!!🤗🤗🌺
I’m 22 and I graduated college just a little 4 months ago and I felt so lost and sad cause I wasn’t where I wanted to be. Applied to multiple jobs only to barely hear back and now am working as a cashier at a grocery store after going through hundreds of job applications and in desperate need of money(the stress of this and having a degree amongst other things made me go through post grad depression . I want to have a career I’m passionate about but also one that pays well too
I completely resonate with that! The transition from university to the world of work is hard and for many of us not as smooth as we expected! Keep your head up and keep reaching for your goals whatever they are. I have a few videos discussing this as i went through something similar when i graduated, check them out if you want more info ❤️
I also felt very confused. Try to get experience elsewhere or a mentor, build skills on your freetime that will help your career. I didnt get a job so I became a freelancer until I could get a real job. Had no money at all! I believe in you🙏
@@maryhannah9685 your negativity wasn’t needed and you don’t know my situation so you shouldn’t speak on someone needing a job once they’re done with school. Not all people are the same
I agree. Your statement doesn’t negate any of the advice from the book though! The most important stage in anyone’s life is where you’re at now. For some of us that’s the 20s 😊
I read that book last year at 22 when I just graduated college and I hope everyone in college can read this book! You did a wonderful summary. You are gorgeous btw 💕
I had a conversation with friends a few days ago that really left me feeling..a bit shitty and lost. So I have entered my 25 years old and think I'm finally starting to feel like I'm just wasting time and potential regarding my career and not getting anywhere. I'm obviously a very creative person and so believe I would only feel satisfied and accomplished in a job that would allow for creativity. But finding any job is already hard, imagine a dream job. But now reaching the later part of my twenties and seeing I'm working towards..nothing? I have done manyyy things, but in the end I'm always feeling like I'm not good at anything
Just turned 20 last month and I feel so overwhelmed by the amount of work I want to put in / have to put in for my future. I'm willing to work hard while still enjoy my youth, hopefully all goes well. I'm going to purchase this book and really apply this advice in any way possible, I'm terrified, but this insight is exactly what I needed to get organized and start prioritizing my career and future! Thank you for this video!
It’s so scary I get you! 😭 I turned 20 2 months ago & I am feeling so so lost in life. I want to get a degree, but I don’t know what subject to study AAAAA. Do you have an ‘end goal’ in mind?
Hmmm this is interesting. I would hope that people listen to this and apply what is useful and leave the rest. The MOST important advice is to not limit yourself and please continue to dream and build your life, well after your 20s oh and remember that success is very subjective; no decade can define you.
When Adama talks I listen! Regarding what you said about salary my auntie who earns over £100k has always said that from what’s she’s observed, if you don’t earn in excess of £50K in your 20s then it’s unlikely that you ever will. Which is scary because I’m 27 and on £30K lol
Yeah, the 20s are a crucial period. In the book she speaks about how in your 30s more 'life stuff' like marriage and children may start to impact ones ability to input into your career alongside other factors. It's by no means over once one turns 30 but for those in their 20s I think it's important to get a head start if you can. Good that you have an aunt whom you can have open conversations about money with 😊
@@AdamaLorna that’s true, as women unfortunately having kids can impact our earning potential. I do count myself lucky to have a family member I can have money conversations with!
This book was the biggest wake up call I needed. I should go back and re-read the author makes alot of good points. I love it. Thankyou for this video.
It is crazy how I watched this video 8 months ago when it came out and now I’m rewatching it, seeing the value of these different points manifest in so many situations this year.
What a wonderful book. I definitely have to order it ! I absolutely love listening to your soothing voice. I am definitely glad that RUclips recommended this video 🤝🏼
Thank you so much for this. I have always felt a strong pull to her since elementary school, and the pictures at the end had me in tears. I am forever grateful for her. I wish we knew more about her descendants as well.
I’m 25 turning 26 very soon and feel like I’ve wasted such solid years of a lot of things. Granted, I’ve checked some things off that some people may never get in their life time but when it comes to career, certain financial independence, some experiences, or college… I’m behind. :( my friend and I are in the same boat (he’s 26 turning 27) and we feel like the best years of our 20’s have left us and that we’re just playing catch up.
I see some disagreements in the comments, but take it from your aunty, who is currently 44 years...Do not waste your 20s. It is not a time to chill. Yes have fun, but strike a balance with planning the rest of your life. If you fail to plan, you're planning to fail. We live in the digital age, where ignorance is no longer an excuse. I'm learning so much now via the internet. I didn't know that my 20s was a season of planting. I'm now having to be planting in my 40s when essentially this could have been my reaping season. We live and we learn....Ignorance isn't bliss. It's an abyss, because what you don't know will hurt you.
@@lillllyweasley3237 it's never too late to change the trajectory of your life. However, time is a commodity that you are lucky to have at 26. You can do a lot more with the next 40 years between now and retirement, as oppose to me with the next 20. START NOW.
I'm 24 and I haven't started on the path of my preferred career yet. I haven't gotten a degree and I haven't had a full time job before yet. Hearing that it'll be tougher for me to excell in my career seeing as I'd be starting later is a bit disheartening for me. But I guess that's my reality. Thanks for the video and tips though.
I'm 16, And right now, I am looking into time management and how to use my time efficiently , .I am planning on taking Software Engineering. I do have certain skills, I want to learn So, I am learning about side hustles, And how to have extra income, So I can save money (in case of any emergency in the future.) And Also take the classes that brings up my interest. I do plan on staying with my parents after high school, Hoping that the job or side hustles would add to have enough to move out. I also plan other things like (investing) But Right now, I'm just focusing on Healthy Habits/skills that will help me in life.
You sound way ahead of most people at 35! Lol everything you said is pretty damn solid. I’ll add that you shouldn’t force yourself to move out so quickly (if you have a good relationship w your parents) bc that’s a luxury a lot of people can’t afford. As long as you get out of your parents house in your 20’s (27 should be the max in my opinion) then you’re good!
Thank you so much for this, learned so much and gave me clarity on some undecided career paths 😊. It's my last year at Uni and I'm struggling to pick a single path to focus on since I have so much interests and hobbies I wanna do 😅
I see how important my twenties are, but ironically that makes me panic rn. I'm in my early twenties and have no idea what I want or maybe just how to get there in this current system. My current mental health is bad, it is genetical I think but obviously the lack of a vision or safety doesn't help. Actually I knew what I wanted and needed to do throughout my teens, but I overestimated my ADHD brain and laughed at something like mental health, so I guess me failing uni and having to give up my dream job is sort of karma? I don't know, I'm fine now not being in a job with a lot of nerds that are way more intelligent than me, the pressure would've crushed me anyway in the next years. In fact, you could say it did after not even a month. Now, I'm privileged enough to pursue another not so safe path, but that also adds to the guilt that I feel towards my parents who always support me (mentally and financially). I just want to be (financially) free but also do the right thing. I want to be a part of this society, an adult, but also not conform to the rules and just live a regular calm life without being bothered. I don't wanna come off as lazy but the thing is that I only feel one thing right now, and that is the time moving forward faster and faster, not being able to be stopped. And this leaves me paralysed. I lost a year to depression because I wasn't able to do anything. That's time I'll never get back, and I don't get younger obviously. I don't know, I just have a tiny existential crisis right now... Right now I feel like my whole life revolves around finding a job, but I don't seem to like anything or be good at something. But I can't just take a break and find myself because we're not like rich. We're fine but it's not easy, especially now. I can't just go on this kind of "spiritual journey" or take a look from the outside because in the end I have to try to build a career as long as I'm young and open to new things. I just don't know where to start.
The writer of this book has some archaic ideas and despite supporting young people, managed to insight dread and anxiety into some of her readers. The overall concepts you discuss make sense but chances are (if you are a motivated person in your 20’s) you are already doing this stuff and just never put a label on it. Like many development books, this one reeks of entitlement and skirts over a-lot of the reasons why these 20 somethings are the way they are. It’s giving… you have 24 hours in a day energy. P.S - 25 is NOT old to start your career. Especially in parts of Europe. This us-centric book misses the mark multiple times but wraps its problematic and just mid statements up in nice blankets that keep you from seeing what it really is.
Starting a career after 25 is late? Idk if I agree with that. All I have ever heard from people above 30 is that you can have career changes or start “late” (in your definition which is 25). People say 25 is young. It’s only a quarter of our full potential lifespan. I know people who get their first degrees at 25, then naturally have to go job searching after that. I’ll graduate at 23, probably get my masters at 25 and maybe then I’ll have an idea of what I want to do. It also sounds shit to have your rise in wage ONLY early on in your career. Does that mean everything gets stagnant later? What’s the point working in that field then unless you really love that field.
Thank you! I have lost quite a few subscribers as a result of this video (which is an interesting thing in itself) but ultimately I stand by this message. If a few people have a more directed or meaningful 20s as a result of this video I'm more than happy 😊
It's always a black content creator speaking absolute facts, not giving a fuck about someone's feelings, I love that from us. Thank you for calling this shit out, I'm 21 years old, and though I'd love to pretend my 30s will be my 20s because who wouldn't want to have youth extended, I know that it won't be. I've been waiting for someone to call this shit out, and just be realistic and open-minded. I sense an analytical brain from you, keep up the good work.
I think it just really depends on a lot of things and what you personally want because at the end of the day there IS youth in your 30’s. As long as you do things right and take care of yourself. It’s not so black and white. Butttttt if you want a certain level of success and security by like 32-35 then you need to absolutely use your 20’s wisely so by your 30’s you have the luxury to live the life YOU want. Whether that’s being rich, traveling, being a wife, being single and secure, owning a business, having a family, assets etc.
I'm twenty five now I've just started university I'll got my dregree at 30 ( architecture school) I lost 5 years because of a traumatic event that almost killed me. I feel like I am super late I want to start my own business while studying ;
Firstly, I’m glad you’re here and doing better than you were 5 years ago. I’m sorry you had to go through that experience! You’re not super late and you have direction. You’re taking action towards that direction and goal. I know architecture school is intense as I have a friend who studied it. If you manage your time I’m sure could work on another project but please don’t feel you HAVE to do everything at once to catch up. Do what makes sense at the time. Wishing you all the best in you’re degree and the New Year ❤️✨
Neurotisism is not a fixed state, try cutting out everyone who keeps putting you down/critisizing you and build up your selftrust/confidence. I‘ve got an angel by my side who will keep me in check or push me if I lack the motivation/trust. You got god on your side and he‘ll gladly help. (Don‘t go on meds.)
I read that book in my 20s, it’s a little outdated now. It was a good book for what it was but trust me your mindset in your 20’s is going to shift as soon as you’re approaching 30. If you think you’ll have life figured out in your 20s, is quite comical. Every single decade, you will enter a new phase and a shift. My only advice is that you save in your 20s, work smarter not harder (no hustle culture) because your body will not function the same as you get older. I’ve learn to read books and take what I can from them but absolutely no book can tell you how your life experiences will be. After all we are not God.
I completely agree that all books should be take as an information source from which to pick and chose what you take away. In fact I did a whole video on that last year. I’m always so curious as to when advice or trying to make decisions towards a goal is considered “having it all figured out”. That seems to be a common theme in some of the comments under this video. This video nor the book in my opinion is about having it all figured out. I took it as explore, enjoy but be empowered to make decisions. Do things that enrich you and will allow you to navigate through social and career spaces; be cautious of social media; and don’t be paralysed by the thought of forever. I like your addition of working smarter a lot though- it’s a major key! Thank you for your input 😊
You made some good points but when you get in your 30s, let’s see if your opinions change. I had similar opinions at 25. I’m 33 and your 30s are way better than your 20s. You don’t need to have your life together by 30 and starting your career after 25 isn’t “late”.
In all honesty I’m not sure it’s about either being “better” fundamentally. They’re different life stages with different opportunities and potential lows. The data suggest the 20s are a critical period for some outcomes. To think the quality of your 30s would not be influenced by the decisions in your 20s would be nonsensical. This video is not about having your life together but instead things to consider whilst navigating an interesting period of one’s life. I actually think a lot of this applies to any stage of life. Thank you for your input.
I turn 33 this year and I agree with you! There are great points made in this video ❤️ I definitely could have used this advice when I was younger but everything started flourishing in my 30’s. The mistakes and sacrifices I made in my 20’s set me up for success in my 30’s
Yeah starting your career after 25 is most definitely not late at ALL. Like if anything that’s when it makes the most sense to start a real career bc you have years of your 20’s left till your 30…. 25 26 & 27 for careers makes a lot of sense. Especially when there’s so many options out there now
I completely AGREE!
31 when I started a real career in Tech but I also know people who rocked at 22
I love this. I’m 27 and “wasted” my early twenties being married only to end up cheated on and now divorced with a child. I put school on hold trying to hold on to my marriage and family. I’m going to get my bachelors degree now. Even if you don’t make all the right moves, it’s never too late until your dead lol. Keep striving and if you can take advantage of this advice, please do so! Great content!
You did what you thought was best and it didn’t work as expected, that’s life! Completely agree and I hope the rest of your 20s and beyond is prosperous and full of opportunities ❤️
You’re only 27! You have years left of your 20’s to really get things done for YOU & nobody else. 3 years is more “20’s time” than a 37 year old has!
I’ll be 30 on Saturday😂 I could have been more selfish and focused. Took more chances. Waited to have my kids. As your disclaimer stated everyone has a different path. BUT if you can realize/ learn things sooner rather than later…that’s always better👍🏽
Happy birthday for Saturday! I appreciate your honesty and willingness to share. I agree we don’t always get it right but the sooner we can learn things the better ❤️
@@AdamaLorna thank you so much and I wish you all the best. Your videos help us more than you know.
Amen to that lol
I embarrassingly failed everything I touched in my 20s. Going to university was a mistake for me. And then, when I finally got a degree to be a nurse at 25, my parent died and I've spent the last four years of my 20s depressed. Not to mention, the pandemic robbed us of at least 2 years. It's been a mess. I'll be 30 in November, and I'm really sad about it. Financially, I'm not prepared and I have no 5 year plan anymore. I haven't learned or succeeded enough for the amount of years I've spent on this Earth.
@@blackheartcardigan I felt everything you said in this statement ❤you are not alone
One thing that has greatly changed is the amount of time we spend in school. If you're not from a wealthy family for example, you finish uni between 22 and 24. You only gain full independence at around 25. During which time you're working in a starter career position. Ofcourse that's the time you're enjoying your independence and financial freedom- at last! Traveling, going out, and having fun with your friends- rightfully so especially if you worked hard in school, didn't have much growing up etc. Before you know it, you're 27 without saving or just enough to get you by and at this time you realize you have to go back to school to attain another degree or in order to progress in your career or find another job. Let's say all that is done by 28 then you start thinking about seriously dating but your finances aren't there yet....lol I can go on and on but it's tough and besides, most people in their 20s aren't mature enough to make the decisions or take on the responsibilities society expects us to automatically assume. We need our carefree 20s to experience life and try things to know what we like or don't, what we are good at etc. I wish the 20s were for 20 yrs not 10 though 🤣🤣🤣. Great video.
That's a good point about education being extended into our early 20s and having a knock-on effect! I'm not sure I completely agree with the timeline about only getting serious about finances or dating at 28. One of my favourite quotes that I mentioned from the book was about taking the time to explore in your 20s but having the nerve to make commitments and decisions. I don't think the 20s are about having it all figured out but I'm not team carefree until you hit 30, that has repercussions for both dating/reproduction and finances which we're just really seeing the effect of. Ultimately the book is really offering good life advice for people in their 20s such as doing things that enrich your character, networking, being cautious of the effects of social media and shoulds, etc. I'd hope anyone in their 20s (or any other period of their life) listening takes the things they feel may be useful away and leaves anything that doesn't resonate. Thank you so much for your feedback and contribution to the discussion ❤️
@@AdamaLorna the reason why the finances won't add up is because most people in their early 20s are in entry level positions that don't pay much. If you're from an African or black household, in addition to taking care of yourself in this extremely expensive landscape, you have family obligations too. Some early to mid 20 yr olds can be lucky enough to get well paying jobs but for most of those jobs, 5yr+ work experience is needed which most 20yr olds dont have. Then there's an assumption that everyone gets a job right away from school. Depending on where you live, it could take awhile. With the pandemic for example, some people had to search for almost 2yrs to find jobs in their field. Being connected to people who are or friends of gatekeepers in the job sector does help. Lets not even forget the barrier when you're black or an immigrant. Moving for work or school does set people back. When you move especially from low income to developed countries, your academic qualifications do not matter there. You literally start from the bottom with minimum wage jobs. Even after you graduate, there's a chance you won't get a good paying job before you get your residency status by that time, you're in your late 20s or 30s. It all depends though. People have different paths in life but the biggest factor that helps people bypass most of these hurdles is privilege. Race, beauty, class, citizenship, connections, intelligence etc. The average people don't have it easy. The economy has made it so much harder too.
@@AdamaLorna for women marrying early could negativity impact your career too since you may spend those early years having children and catering to them.
I resonate with this experience so much. I spent my 20’s discovering myself and who I am.
I was poor but also came from a very abusive household so my 20’s were just for me to be able to live my life.
I’m 29 this year going on 30 and doing a career changer and thinking about taking school as far as I can this time.
And that’s with a previous bachelor’s degree already!
But I think it’s so worth it. If I don’t do it now, I’ll be 30 or 40 anyways and not having anything to show for it.
I feel like all the experiences of my 20’s let me live out my dreams and selfish wishes.
It’s time to grow up. I don’t regret it at all. Maybe just wish I was a little more mature earlier lol.
There just shouldn’t be certain ages things have to be done in your 20’s. As long as you’re going any of those things in your 20’s you’re set
This is interesting thanks for sharing awesome tips sis! I'm 32, financially free and currently growing a solid retirement plan. It takes a positive and consistency to learn new things, unlearn the old habits ms Important to get a mentor/coach to lead you all the way. It's great to start young too!
Hi, Sandra I'm 36 working on my retirement fund too. What do you think is the best target for retirement?
A lot of people find having a couch /financial advisor a luxury
@@gracedaniels6172 personally I think 1m is the goal to overcome inflation and having them in an inv estment p ortfolio is a perfect plan. I'm half way to my goal 😊
@@louis-freddieceaser8811 yeah. Fees and commissions are factors to look at in search for financial advisers. There’s financial experts out there who do not look at their fees but the impact and intrinsic value they bring along to you no matter how little you want to start. I’m glad I had one guide me start my financial journey
I'm trying to read books about finance, budgeting and saving. Looking at having a good financial advisor. Can you recommend
I’m in my late 20’s and didn’t get a 20’s. I left my only abusive family (narcisstic mother dynamic) at 18 and ended up stuck in hostels and benefits system in the UK. If you work too many hours your rent becomes unreasonable so your caught in the poverty benefits trap.
I didn’t get a 20’s due to my childhood trauma that I’ve only just got able a decent therapist now 😢
So I guess my 30’s hopefully will be my time to live. Thank God I’ve never wanted children otherwise I’d feel a lot worse about my current situation.
I'm so sorry to hear that. I'm glad you're on your way to recovery and I wish you all the best moving forward!
@@AdamaLorna Thank you x
Same for me, left my family at 23 years old. Felt like the most alone at that point. But I got myself into therapy and found better people to support my healing. Turned 25 this august and ive been very lucky. I have a good job and a lot more freedom now more than ever.
But you’re still in your 20’s….?
A big part of making a lot of money and having a successful life is being an effective communicator which is something that you are. You and a lot of self help RUclipsrs have a good way with your words. Having a good command of words or ‘chat’ can get you into places.
I agree, communication is perhaps one of the most important tools one can have at their hand for life in general and specifically for career progression. Thank you!
I just turned 23 years old and with the past of the years I feel more stuck, I don't have a job, I don't have a career and everyday when I wake up I feel more depressed, sometimes I think I'm just I failure without any goals or dreams to achieve until the point where I ask myself what's the purpose of my life, I got married at 22 years old and I am in love with my husband however I am not happy with my own life. I wish I can get my stuff together in a few years and I pray to God to be in a better place later on ♥️ thank you so much for your advice.
You’re so young in the grand scheme and as long as you really WANT a different life then you can make it. Get your head in the game. I mean hell even if you decided this at 28 you’d still have 2 & a half years to change your path/life and still be on time if you worked hard enough. But all in all find balance in getting what you really want but also enjoying your 20’s. It’s possible
I just turned 30 and although I’m in a comfortable place in life, Im definitely not where I want to be. I wasted a lot of time from 19 -25 that I could of leveraged to be closer to my goals now. However, I recognize that Im still young so I’m going to go hard these next 5 years 💪🏼
Best attitude to have! We all live and learn but the arrow of time points forward so we gotta keep pushing towards our goals. Hope you have a great next 5 years ❤️
@@AdamaLorna totally agree! We cant give up. Thank you for the encouragement 💜
At the age of 21 I said I wanted to do my Masters before 30, at 28 I am in the application process with no financial support but just hope. Pray for me.
Wishing you all the best with your application ❤️✨
I like all the advice Adama gave but everyone's journey is different had my 1st child at 17 and 2nd child at 27 never went to college or Uni at 30 packed my things and moved to Ghana for a year and bought land and enjoyed also went from making 30k a year to 85k in one year.. my journey in life has been amazing don't think you have to do life the traditional way the sky is the limit and I'm an AA
Thank you Sylvia! You're right everyone's journey is different, no advice or recommendations will ever apply to every person and some people excel via very different paths. We do have to be realistic about generalities though. I don't think these points are about being 'traditional' but are just potentially useful things to consider if you want to accelerate your career growth and general life path. I appreciate you sharing your journey ❤️
Ghanaian here
Welcome
I’m literally 15 and I’m so happy I can learn from people in the comments and from you about how to navigate my twenty’s 💕💖
I’m 22 and I just went out and bought this book today. I’ve started it and I’m enjoying it so far. I feel like it’s exactly what I need to hear right now.
You have a head start on a lot of people if you consider the points raised in the book! I'm glad you're enjoying it and I hope your 20s are prosperous and enjoyable!
Not sure about this video. I think in theory it makes sense but I also think it’s quite triggering for people in their 30’s who didn’t have their 20’s all figured out. Speaking as someone in the 30’s it’s not over at all. You can have fun in 20’s not have it all figured out as many of us haven’t and then focus in your 30’s. I’d love you to revisit this video when your 34 Adama to see your thoughts.
I appreciate your feedback on the video! I understand that the realisation of time passing can be triggering but I don't think thats reason enough to not have an open conversation with those who are in their 20s and still have the time to make the most out of it, elders have done this since the beginning of time. By no means do I think once you turn 30 life suddenly implodes, but time and age are a reality of the physical world. I don't agree that the 20s should just be for 'fun'. I think its a time to explore meaningfully and start to make intentional decisions for your future but that doesn't equal having it all figured out. Building identity capital, networking, being cautious of social media and building a customised life in your 20s seems like pretty solid things to consider but I appreciate that those in their 30s may disagree. Thank you for bringing your perspective to the conversation! ❤️
It's not about being triggering. It's about being disenpowering. Everytime someone associates enpowerment with leveraging their age in society, it makes it inherently disenpowering for someone else who is younger or old. I have no problem with it.....but as a part of my conscious deciding of I wanted to be in my 20s, I decided I didn't want to enable these ideas in the culture. :)
Hey Jean, thats an interesting take. I don't think triggered and disempowered are mutually exclusive. The emotion/feeling triggered may very well be disempowerment though, I agree with you. Age is an immutable fact. I'm not quite sure what ideas in the culture you're referring to. Would you not advise people in their 20s to consider some of the points made or is it more the fact that you believe one can do all of this in their 30s and achieve the same thing as someone who started doing these things in their 20s? Genuine question btw as I'm interested on what parts you reject/ are not keen on enabling 😊
@@AdamaLorna To be honest I didn't watch your video. So I'm not critiquing it. It may sound flippant or hypocritical, but I tend to judge base on title and some comments before I watch many youtube videos, and I knew from the title it'd probably be something I don't agree with. I replied to lalalou because I tend to empathize with people for whom the ageist equation isn't verry favourable. So I was just adding my two cents to what lalalou was talking about :)
When I mentioned enabling, I meant ageism of any kind. For me the society of the future sees people for their soul first and age second (or not at all, for the most part)...and whether or not you succeed in leveraging your age in a positive way....is largely a function of how many blocks you have to your freedom and happiness at any one age. So someone who at 25 is turning around in bed with flashbacks of a traumatic experience, with no money or family support.........versus someone with a totally different experience at that age.........will obviously have a very different lifeplan.
So it's really for me a broad thing. I'm the kind of guy that likes to address the root cause of these fears and ways of "enpowering" yourself. But I'm super aware of the fact it's done in a societal context....that is usually extremely biased. I don't like it. And I'm also first and foremost about validating people's experience ... like the trauma example I gave.....rather than help people succeed within the system.
My point is....timesensitive advice or information is not something I feel is enpowering in most cases. I'm not dismissing your ideas (since I didn't watch the video :D) but on principle I'm pretty much against anything that draws on societal fears to move the individual's life forward..or even aknowledges age biases within societies as realiies one has to consider. And I speak as someone who is close to being 36 and who has missed many chances in terms of timing. But if I didn't....and I was now experiencing the benefit of having done it the "right" or "responsible" or "proactively sensible" way....I'd probably have less empathy for everyone else who did things in the "wrong timing". I'm here to destroy social BS....and wanna help people be MORE inclsuive...and pay LESS attention or respect to our social molds. OTHERWISE I am going to enable things I don't like. And most of these strategies are slightly fear-based at the subcosncious core....the fear of missing out etc. I don't want that timeline for planet Earth :)
It's near impossible for me to meaningfully engage in this discussion given I wouldn't be defending my position, as you haven't watched my video. I'd be instead debating what you assume I'm conveying based on my title/thumbnail (which is of course your right to do). Being aware of age and the passage of time is not inherently ageist. However, I stand by your right to your opinion even if I don't agree 😊
hey, just a quick disclaimer. I know I'm in my mid-20s and not trying to act like I've solved all the riddles of life but I found a lot of these points in the book reflected through both statistics and anecdotal evidence from my own life and those that I know. This path is of course not the case for everyone and we will always find exceptions to general statements. I'd love to hear your thoughts on the book summary and how that matches up with your reality ❤
To be honest the fact your helping people guiding them as best you can about their 20’s is brilliant I think I wish I had found you sooner and always remember that you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make it drink
Thank you for this channel as I wasted most of my twenties which I regret
Please keep these coming! I’m 27 & feel so stuck🥹
Will do! Working on the next one 😊
I'll be 28 at the start of the year, and I fell guilty to wanting to see my life as an impressive outcome. I wasnt able to take pics of my graduation, so I felt like I missed my shine. My job is industry relevant but the pay is subpar. I have business ideas that are just on paper, and I felt like if I don't get it done by 30 it'll never happen. I'm letting go of those ideas that life has to stay this way. I'm learning not to let fear of failure hold me back and use my current position to network and align with my interests career goals of serving the community in financial education, of writing my own blog and candlemaking. Great video as always💖
Thank you for being so open! Its definitely not over, its just that every year is precious including your 20s, life doesn't stop at 30 though! All those things sound like really interesting pursuits and I wish you the best in your journey 💕
@@AdamaLorna Thank you so much!!
If you have a great connection to your family you should definitely spend a lot of time with them in your 20s. I grew up with my parents, grandparents and great grandma in the house and now only live 5 min away. My grandparents won’t live forever I wanna spend a lot of time with them and it’s so worth it! Building connections with your loved ones no matter if family or friends is the absolute most important thing to me. Create unforgettable memories, those are like a goldmine to happiness and will last you forever. A career will never fulfill you like your loved ones do! Loved your video tho, a career is also very important and can bring fulfillment but I think we shouldn’t rely on this so much cause in the end it’s just a way how our society works, human connection is ever lasting in all societal forms.
I'm in my early 20's and already feel so pressured of being "behind" based on what I see my friends and family accomplish on social media. I think I'll get this book because you've covered almost all my self doubts i've been having & this was refreshing to hear, thank you!
I felt that which is why I haven’t been on ig for months. Seeing people your age and maybe even younger appear to be living this amazing lifestyle when you’re not where you want to be can def affect your self esteem but then I always have to remember that there’s always a story behind a picture and a lot of people can fake it for the gram and comparing myself won’t do anything for me. Once you limit your usage of social media it really does bring a sense of peace of mind😌
@@chanela.7786 Yesss! I've slowly been doing this as well & although I sometimes get the "fear of missing out" (aka FOMO), it's been so helpful for me 👏 thank you for the kind words of advice 😊
Its so easy to feel like that, I have to be careful on social media and take breaks too! I'm glad the video may have eased some doubts and concerns you had! Completely agree with Chanel ❤️
You can set up your life at any age, it’s all about will power not age. Sure, it’s easier in your 20s, but let’s be honest here, many people use their 20s to experiment, many of us aren’t really sure of what we want at that age, as we get older, our priorities get clearer. Time has a big factor too, in the 60s, women were wives and mothers in their early 20s, and we all know how that worked out for the family relationships. You can’t rush experience, this obsession with success in the 20s is just a part of society’s infatuation with making everyone feel like life ends as soon as your 20s are over. Heck, successful marriages with healthy relationships occur when partners are older. I rest my case.
Sooo excited for this series!!! Just turned 23 and I’m honestly s excited for this era
I'm glad! You should be excited the 20s are a weird but beautiful period of exploration and growth ✨
Any actions you take or don’t take during any decade, will significantly affect the rest of your life
I turned 20 in January and I started to look at videos about being in your 20s. I did enjoy the video and I gave me a bit more insight in terms of career because that was mostly my main focus going into the new year. Thanks for that!!🤗🤗🌺
You’re welcome!!
I’m 22 and I graduated college just a little 4 months ago and I felt so lost and sad cause I wasn’t where I wanted to be. Applied to multiple jobs only to barely hear back and now am working as a cashier at a grocery store after going through hundreds of job applications and in desperate need of money(the stress of this and having a degree amongst other things made me go through post grad depression . I want to have a career I’m passionate about but also one that pays well too
I completely resonate with that! The transition from university to the world of work is hard and for many of us not as smooth as we expected! Keep your head up and keep reaching for your goals whatever they are. I have a few videos discussing this as i went through something similar when i graduated, check them out if you want more info ❤️
I also felt very confused. Try to get experience elsewhere or a mentor, build skills on your freetime that will help your career. I didnt get a job so I became a freelancer until I could get a real job. Had no money at all! I believe in you🙏
Uh..yeah get used to it. You shouldn't get a job as soon as you graduate tbh. Welcome to the real world.
@@maryhannah9685 your negativity wasn’t needed and you don’t know my situation so you shouldn’t speak on someone needing a job once they’re done with school. Not all people are the same
I needed this. I turn 28 in two weeks and I feel so complacent . Thank you for the encouraging words to keep me pushing!
Your attitude towards the video is so positive that I’m sure the last two years of your 20s and beyond will be great! Have a good birthday too ❤️
Life is never guaranteed. Just live life to the fullest and always be your best regardless of how old you are.
I agree. Your statement doesn’t negate any of the advice from the book though! The most important stage in anyone’s life is where you’re at now. For some of us that’s the 20s 😊
I read that book last year at 22 when I just graduated college and I hope everyone in college can read this book! You did a wonderful summary. You are gorgeous btw 💕
I only just found it but it makes great points! It's great you found it in your early 20s. Thank you Sacha! ❤️
I had a conversation with friends a few days ago that really left me feeling..a bit shitty and lost. So I have entered my 25 years old and think I'm finally starting to feel like I'm just wasting time and potential regarding my career and not getting anywhere. I'm obviously a very creative person and so believe I would only feel satisfied and accomplished in a job that would allow for creativity. But finding any job is already hard, imagine a dream job. But now reaching the later part of my twenties and seeing I'm working towards..nothing? I have done manyyy things, but in the end I'm always feeling like I'm not good at anything
Just turned 20 last month and I feel so overwhelmed by the amount of work I want to put in / have to put in for my future. I'm willing to work hard while still enjoy my youth, hopefully all goes well. I'm going to purchase this book and really apply this advice in any way possible, I'm terrified, but this insight is exactly what I needed to get organized and start prioritizing my career and future! Thank you for this video!
You have 9 years of real youth left… use them wisely! Bc 30-38 is adult youth lol
It’s so scary I get you! 😭 I turned 20 2 months ago & I am feeling so so lost in life. I want to get a degree, but I don’t know what subject to study AAAAA. Do you have an ‘end goal’ in mind?
Hmmm this is interesting. I would hope that people listen to this and apply what is useful and leave the rest. The MOST important advice is to not limit yourself and please continue to dream and build your life, well after your 20s oh and remember that success is very subjective; no decade can define you.
When Adama talks I listen! Regarding what you said about salary my auntie who earns over £100k has always said that from what’s she’s observed, if you don’t earn in excess of £50K in your 20s then it’s unlikely that you ever will. Which is scary because I’m 27 and on £30K lol
Yeah, the 20s are a crucial period. In the book she speaks about how in your 30s more 'life stuff' like marriage and children may start to impact ones ability to input into your career alongside other factors. It's by no means over once one turns 30 but for those in their 20s I think it's important to get a head start if you can. Good that you have an aunt whom you can have open conversations about money with 😊
@@AdamaLorna that’s true, as women unfortunately having kids can impact our earning potential. I do count myself lucky to have a family member I can have money conversations with!
@@robertah2353hey! Please may you tell me what career path your Aunty went down? I turned 20 last month & have never felt so lost in my life !!
This book was the biggest wake up call I needed. I should go back and re-read the author makes alot of good points. I love it. Thankyou for this video.
We all need a reminder from time to time! You're welcome ❤️
It is crazy how I watched this video 8 months ago when it came out and now I’m rewatching it, seeing the value of these different points manifest in so many situations this year.
What a wonderful book. I definitely have to order it ! I absolutely love listening to your soothing voice. I am definitely glad that RUclips recommended this video 🤝🏼
It is very interesting and worth the read! Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed the video! ✨
Thank you so much for this. I have always felt a strong pull to her since elementary school, and the pictures at the end had me in tears. I am forever grateful for her. I wish we knew more about her descendants as well.
Thank you so much for this Adama! This is so valuable and I can relate to everything you're saying here.
You're welcome! Thank you for listening with an open mind!
your communication skills are very good and you are very articulative. maybe you could do a video on that...
Thank you! I'll definitely think about it
As a fresh graduate, I loved this whole video. Definitely has me reflecting bc these twenties are flyinggg by!
Congratulations on graduating! I'm glad you found the video useful. the 20s honestly fly ✨
I’m 25 turning 26 very soon and feel like I’ve wasted such solid years of a lot of things. Granted, I’ve checked some things off that some people may never get in their life time but when it comes to career, certain financial independence, some experiences, or college… I’m behind. :( my friend and I are in the same boat (he’s 26 turning 27) and we feel like the best years of our 20’s have left us and that we’re just playing catch up.
I see some disagreements in the comments, but take it from your aunty, who is currently 44 years...Do not waste your 20s. It is not a time to chill. Yes have fun, but strike a balance with planning the rest of your life. If you fail to plan, you're planning to fail. We live in the digital age, where ignorance is no longer an excuse. I'm learning so much now via the internet. I didn't know that my 20s was a season of planting. I'm now having to be planting in my 40s when essentially this could have been my reaping season.
We live and we learn....Ignorance isn't bliss. It's an abyss, because what you don't know will hurt you.
What if your 26/27 just realizing this lol is it wasted already
@@lillllyweasley3237 it's never too late to change the trajectory of your life. However, time is a commodity that you are lucky to have at 26. You can do a lot more with the next 40 years between now and retirement, as oppose to me with the next 20. START NOW.
I really enjoyed this video. Turned 20 this year !
I’m glad you did! ❤️
REALLY loved this video! Looking forward to the rest of the series
Thank you! Editing the next one now 😊
Sister , you are absolutely beautiful and completely flourishing 💗 loving you 💗💗💗💗
Thank you! ❤️❤️
This was a very intelligent and insightful review of the book!
Thank you so much!
Very informational video, I'm 20 I understand everyday how important this period of my life is.
I'm 24 and I haven't started on the path of my preferred career yet. I haven't gotten a degree and I haven't had a full time job before yet. Hearing that it'll be tougher for me to excell in my career seeing as I'd be starting later is a bit disheartening for me. But I guess that's my reality. Thanks for the video and tips though.
Bingew watching your videos its so awesome
You and this video are remarkably congruent.
Thank you!
Love your hair 😍😍
So happy youtube suggested you. I love you already (5 minutes in)
Subscribed af ❤
im here for this series!! please keep giving us!!
Thank you Anthonia! ✨
The Defining Decade is the best book I’ve read so far!
It is a really good book!
So glad you did this topic so very crucial I will share this Thank you
Thank you! I’m glad you liked the topic 🥰
Omg I have to read this book now, because Ian is ME rn 😭😂 thank you for doing this breakdown it was so good & full of value
This was so good 🤌
Thank you!
Beautiful voice. You could be an audible reader or early morning radio host...type of voice id like to listen to as I start my day
Thank you Sandra!
Omg I’m about to binge all of your content
I'm 16, And right now, I am looking into time management and how to use my time efficiently , .I am planning on taking Software Engineering. I do have certain skills, I want to learn So, I am learning about side hustles, And how to have extra income, So I can save money (in case of any emergency in the future.) And Also take the classes that brings up my interest. I do plan on staying with my parents after high school, Hoping that the job or side hustles would add to have enough to move out.
I also plan other things like (investing) But Right now, I'm just focusing on Healthy Habits/skills that will help me in life.
You sound way ahead of most people at 35! Lol everything you said is pretty damn solid. I’ll add that you shouldn’t force yourself to move out so quickly (if you have a good relationship w your parents) bc that’s a luxury a lot of people can’t afford. As long as you get out of your parents house in your 20’s (27 should be the max in my opinion) then you’re good!
Weeb
Thank you so much for this, learned so much and gave me clarity on some undecided career paths 😊. It's my last year at Uni and I'm struggling to pick a single path to focus on since I have so much interests and hobbies I wanna do 😅
Really amazing insights, thank you so much 💘
I see how important my twenties are, but ironically that makes me panic rn. I'm in my early twenties and have no idea what I want or maybe just how to get there in this current system. My current mental health is bad, it is genetical I think but obviously the lack of a vision or safety doesn't help.
Actually I knew what I wanted and needed to do throughout my teens, but I overestimated my ADHD brain and laughed at something like mental health, so I guess me failing uni and having to give up my dream job is sort of karma? I don't know, I'm fine now not being in a job with a lot of nerds that are way more intelligent than me, the pressure would've crushed me anyway in the next years. In fact, you could say it did after not even a month. Now, I'm privileged enough to pursue another not so safe path, but that also adds to the guilt that I feel towards my parents who always support me (mentally and financially). I just want to be (financially) free but also do the right thing. I want to be a part of this society, an adult, but also not conform to the rules and just live a regular calm life without being bothered. I don't wanna come off as lazy but the thing is that I only feel one thing right now, and that is the time moving forward faster and faster, not being able to be stopped. And this leaves me paralysed. I lost a year to depression because I wasn't able to do anything. That's time I'll never get back, and I don't get younger obviously. I don't know, I just have a tiny existential crisis right now...
Right now I feel like my whole life revolves around finding a job, but I don't seem to like anything or be good at something. But I can't just take a break and find myself because we're not like rich. We're fine but it's not easy, especially now. I can't just go on this kind of "spiritual journey" or take a look from the outside because in the end I have to try to build a career as long as I'm young and open to new things. I just don't know where to start.
ARE THERE MORE IF THESE SUMMARIES?!? Fire!!
There’s three in the series ☺️🤍
this video is so useful, thank you so much
The writer of this book has some archaic ideas and despite supporting young people, managed to insight dread and anxiety into some of her readers. The overall concepts you discuss make sense but chances are (if you are a motivated person in your 20’s) you are already doing this stuff and just never put a label on it.
Like many development books, this one reeks of entitlement and skirts over a-lot of the reasons why these 20 somethings are the way they are. It’s giving… you have 24 hours in a day energy.
P.S - 25 is NOT old to start your career. Especially in parts of Europe. This us-centric book misses the mark multiple times but wraps its problematic and just mid statements up in nice blankets that keep you from seeing what it really is.
You have a LOVELY voice ,just wanted to say that . It's super cool🔥🔥🔥🔥from a young girl in South Africa looking to be intentional in her life 🔥
Starting a career after 25 is late? Idk if I agree with that. All I have ever heard from people above 30 is that you can have career changes or start “late” (in your definition which is 25). People say 25 is young. It’s only a quarter of our full potential lifespan. I know people who get their first degrees at 25, then naturally have to go job searching after that. I’ll graduate at 23, probably get my masters at 25 and maybe then I’ll have an idea of what I want to do. It also sounds shit to have your rise in wage ONLY early on in your career. Does that mean everything gets stagnant later? What’s the point working in that field then unless you really love that field.
such an inspiration
Thank you!
Good evaluation, I read the book but forgot some points so it’s good to remember
Thank you!
Can you create a podcast please?? This video taught me so much
This is a very helpful video. Thank you! Kudos to you, too. You're very smart!
I’m glad it was useful! Thank you 😊
I love your hair style! where did you get the extensions from? Could you send a link?
I had respectable identity capital, but had an accident that basically ‘wiped’ it off. Now I have to start all over again
Adama, thank you so much for posting your videos! I love your content 🫶🏾 and I would totally join a book club of yours! Lol.
You're so welcome Aria. Thank you, may have to consider that lol!
Thank you!..I'm glad someone said it!
Thank you! I have lost quite a few subscribers as a result of this video (which is an interesting thing in itself) but ultimately I stand by this message. If a few people have a more directed or meaningful 20s as a result of this video I'm more than happy 😊
Just came across your channel, thank you so much! 😭 New Subbie here 👌🏼
Loved this ❤
❤️
yes it is.
It's always a black content creator speaking absolute facts, not giving a fuck about someone's feelings, I love that from us. Thank you for calling this shit out, I'm 21 years old, and though I'd love to pretend my 30s will be my 20s because who wouldn't want to have youth extended, I know that it won't be. I've been waiting for someone to call this shit out, and just be realistic and open-minded. I sense an analytical brain from you, keep up the good work.
I think it just really depends on a lot of things and what you personally want because at the end of the day there IS youth in your 30’s. As long as you do things right and take care of yourself. It’s not so black and white. Butttttt if you want a certain level of success and security by like 32-35 then you need to absolutely use your 20’s wisely so by your 30’s you have the luxury to live the life YOU want. Whether that’s being rich, traveling, being a wife, being single and secure, owning a business, having a family, assets etc.
Time is always ticking
She right time lost is never gain who would have taught a 92 babe will be 30 so soon either ways life still continues
Time is flyingggg. You're right you gotta work with what you got regardless of your age
I'm twenty five now I've just started university I'll got my dregree at 30 ( architecture school) I lost 5 years because of a traumatic event that almost killed me. I feel like I am super late I want to start my own business while studying ;
Firstly, I’m glad you’re here and doing better than you were 5 years ago. I’m sorry you had to go through that experience! You’re not super late and you have direction. You’re taking action towards that direction and goal. I know architecture school is intense as I have a friend who studied it. If you manage your time I’m sure could work on another project but please don’t feel you HAVE to do everything at once to catch up. Do what makes sense at the time. Wishing you all the best in you’re degree and the New Year ❤️✨
Yes so true my entire 30s I was so focused on trying to get married and wasted so much time.
Thank you for being honest and sharing that!
Off topic! But, your hair! Please share details.
would be good if u did some little content on how u grew ur yotuube channel lol!! love this
I think there are a lot of channels that discuss that better than me, but thank you!
What’s the details on your hair please? X
I‘m 30 and - So glad. 🥵😂
How can I do anything when I have social anxiety and bpd
It’s not east. You need therapy and meds. Once you get that help you can start to flourish.
Neurotisism is not a fixed state, try cutting out everyone who keeps putting you down/critisizing you and build up your selftrust/confidence. I‘ve got an angel by my side who will keep me in check or push me if I lack the motivation/trust. You got god on your side and he‘ll gladly help. (Don‘t go on meds.)
I wish I had made multi millions in my 20s .
Mind you I’m not poor either
For men, 40 is the new 25.
Different story for women.
Omg the hair 😍 😭 😩
Thank you! ❤️