Says the guy who’s overweight...everybody’s got to make a buck though. Naaman’s leprosy spread to who? The irony of telling women to get self control. Oh if the household of God would just flee from all that make merchandise of you and just open your Bible yourself!
I’m a psychological therapist working in a secular environment in the uk health service and have become exhausted with the you need more self love and know yourself better approach that is so pervasive in therapy right now. Read your book recently Rachel and it was a breath of fresh air and has encouraged me as a Christian therapist to move into Christian counselling where I can promote the idea of people counselling themselves ‘ in the Lord’ more and helping bring self-control into our emotional lives. Many thanks, Steve in 🇬🇧
Great video, y’all! I turned to my husband and said “babe, they’re talking about me!”. Can’t tell you enough how helpful this was for me, our marriage, and my mothering. Praising God for your ministry.
She's right. 'We are born with enough love for ourselves, we don't need to learn how to better do that.' The narcissistic cultural messaging has certainly been embraced by many 'churches.'
Exactly. We have dopamine which is entirely wired to ensure love of self and self preservation. Unfortunately society has developed ways to short circuit that and creates destructive ways to get a dopamine release. But it’s still self loving to engage in those destructive measures. It’s not altruism that leads people to drugs. A far better message than self love is self discipline. Self discipline would mean feeding your body what is good for it, exercising, etc.
One way to kill the dominance of emotions is to always focus on hearing truth, and even hearing truth, no matter what sex it is coming from. If it lines up with the Scriptures, then just listen.
@@ethanrayment8157 when the word of God and the hearing of truth and trying to focus on what is, is what you desire to see things with, then, you have emotions, but you beat your body. I had a lividly offended mom and her kids screaming me "b***ch, I'll slap you", because I expressed how I felt bad that the kids were listening to degrading and demeaning music, and I just stood right there, and talked directly to them, and as a result, it's like it spilled the wind from their sails.
Yet, America is a land where image and presentation matters. That sanitized image is usually at odds with our soul and personality. Most of us live a lie - several of them. If you want to "focus on the truth" then you have to ditch materialism and status in most cases. Most people wouldn't make that sacrifice, so a word of lies is what we get. A world that doesn't sit right with our soul. And emotions is just our soul crying out for help. Asking and begging us to live in alignment with truth. Truth is a very high order.
@@patrickmcmanus1360 I must decrease and He must increase. The closer you renew your mind in Jesus, the more you will lack reputation and popularity with the secular and secular religious system. Sadly, this had been brought into Christianity, no matter what the denomination. This is why you hear, "those evangelicals___" but yet you don't hear, "those protestants___", even though both dishonor Sola Scriptura just as much as the other in amount, although the areas may be different. The reformed dishonor it in how they don't see a need to repent because of their doctrines or systematic theology that goes against what the Scriptures truly say, and the evangelicals, who are more prone to promote their emotions and feelings before the Scriptures.
Oh my yes! My women’s church group turned into venting and commiserating victimization alternating with self glorification sessions. No help at all. Even harm.
I watched this on CanonPlus and am so glad it is available to all here as it is such a powerful learning tool to see such good Christians (yes I know it is father & daughter) as great examples to learn about such important topics! Thank You Both 🙏
I have been so convicted lately about my inability to make an orderly home where my children are enjoyable to be around. I came from a quite rigid often joyless home and have overcorrected to the point where my home is chaotic loud messy and stressful to the point where I start yelling to get a grip on what's going on. I have to see the difference between sterile rigidity and calm self control. Because the constant chaos and overwhelm in my home can be just as joyless as the frigid micromanaged home of my childhood
@Provoked Brittany I had a father in the home. And I am married to the father of my children. But he came from a chaotic fatherless gypsy existence. We are believers but I want both of us to grow in how we parent and run our home
@@AdrienneJung.M Boy I bet your husband the fun dad ? You need your mother to come and visit for a couple weeks , she'd whip them into shape . ( kind of like Marry Poppins ?)
Start with small changes like meal times and then bed times and work your way from there. Make those times fun so the children will look forward to them. This way it’s not a total shock to the household.
Yes, I have found that if I tell women to "calm down" and "stop being so emotional" it works wonders 😆 But seriously, I completely agree that people learning control over their emotions sets them free. People are afraid to accept the concept of emotional self-control, but if we don't, it is everything and everyone else that will control us.
In response to the notion that I need to love myself before/so that I can love others: why? Why is loving one's self the first or key step to knowing how to love others? Scripture tells us that the example we need has already been given; God first loved us and by this we know love. We can know how to love others by the (more than sufficient) example of God's love toward us (as revealed through Christ and His word). We don't need to create our own template based off of our self love.
This self love and self awareness/inventory is really goin over everyones heads here. If you cant love yourself and you dont work on self, then you can't fully help others in a healthy way. This is extremely important. Its not putting yourself on a pedestal. It's the reality of we have to live inside ourself at all times. Don't put self down. You're very important and thats the truth.
You guys are really on to something, great talk. One thing you didn’t really go into to is the ‘how’ part of the equation. Just to say we need more control isn’t enough, we could do with practical instruction on how to maintain control over emotion, what exactly do we need to do. As a quick example: while driving we have all experienced other drivers cutting in and doing things that can potentially be quite annoying, which can get us frustrated or upset. How does one prepare and deal with situations like that in a Christ like way. I think we also have to be careful about *pretending* we are dealing with it too, or as you both said bottling things up only to face an explosion down the road.
Keeping our eyes on the mission and sprinkling grace on everything helps. Because the only thing any of us deserve is damnation. That's a very difficult idea to embrace for us in America. Also, don't camp out in the left lane and leave some room for folks to merge. That practically solves 99.9% of driving stress.
I thought the same thing. I do think there's good in just pointing out that the message heard from the world on the topic is not biblical like you would think. It's a good starting point.
All humans need emotional control. We were created with the capacity to think and reason, for a purpose. Balance is needed between emotion and reason. Poor outcomes when one or the other dominates actions.
Great content to add to the cultural conversations 👏🏻👏🏻 just hearing this is a course correction for me. We constantly need to be reminded of truth and what we believe and how we should live 😂 we’re so forgetful!
My son and I are really close! He’s easy to get along with, but I can hardly ever have a conversation with my husband that doesn’t turn into an argument. Because everything has to be his way. He never admits he’s wrong and he can be very sarcastic, which drives me crazy! I hope I can apply your advice and not let my emotions control me. It would be great to have peace in our marriage.
Highly recommend the book "created to be his helpmeet". Remember WHY you married him. Focus on that rather than his sin. You aren't his holy spirit. Treat him with respect, love, and win him without a word!!!
Thank you for the talk show! You and your father are doing a great job! I've been through this whole thing for at least 20 years. How could I get help? Can I fix the mess I made? I have never been instructed in this subject specifically. I feel like God has been punishing us for our self being. Please, help me as I go through the way back.
Males being human beings also must control their emotions also, to not become controlled by the total shut-down of real spiritually, emotional involvement, or to become obsessively consumed with the egotistical “controlling” rage-full anger. and floundering sex in relationships. And this is a primary reason in character development in worldly relationships for family, why the AllMightY hates war(s)
I don’t understand why I get angry when I see this. It must be my pride. I just don’t understand why it upsets me. Maybe because my greatest struggle is managing my emotions 🤷🏻♀️
Everyone struggle with Emotions not just women , the culture now days kids aren't disciplined enough ( not saying physically ) a lot of times they run the house or run rough shot over it, this going cause enormous amount of stress in the family. When I grew up I had respect ,and fear of my father , he was great dad but you knew where the boundary's where. 100 years ago in the more patriarchy family dynamic , the father complained and the wife kept her mouth shut, and if the kids acted up, there was always the trip behind the woodshed with dad.
I don't think it's wise to suppress emotions, they are there for a reason, they are not a problem, they are a symptom. If we get in the habit of asking God where is the root of that overwhelming or uncomfortable emotion He will show us a heart issue that need to be dealt with weather it is a change in perspective or healing of an emotional wound. The people who have gone thru the most pain are often the most difficult to deal with because of how broken their heart is, unfortunately often in church people who have never gone thru a lot of hurt don't understand and don't know how to help but Jesus does. Don't suppress your emotions to please others, seek to heal deeply to free yourself and become more stable and peaceful. ❤
The scripture doesn't say to have emotional control but "self" control. The greatest commandment is to love with "all one's heart." Not that scripture if for unbridled emotion, but everything get Calvinized is beyond me.
@@justanotherbaptistjew5659 Hey there BJ. If I may elaborate, because these legalists fly under the radar, much like JWs do with their endless hooks and strawmen--"What? Don't you want peace?" Our problem is said to be sin. Under that umbrella we may place death, sickness and every carnal weakness, whether of the mind (the Greek go to) or the heart (the Judaic metonymn). We are enjoined to weep with those who weep, mourn with those who mourn, despite the many Calvinistic warnings against "empathy." Now, should we: 1. Get angry with those who are angry 2. Get resentful with those who are resentful 3. Seeth, fume and burn with those who do so, and a zillion other human foibles of the passions? No. But as a Jew, you ought to know the Shema by "heart."
@@justanotherbaptistjew5659 Silly me, "heart" is a synecdoche, not a metonymn. An example of metonomy would be calling Calvinists "cuffllinks." Of course, brother Wilson prefers a sweater vest.
@@duncescotus2342 I don’t think that this video is calling for all emotions to be ignored and suppressed. They even used the example of being chaste and being repressed. I believe you might just be looking for something to attack.
@@justanotherbaptistjew5659 Well, you know what they say--the best defense is a good offense. But that's good isn't it, the appeal to a healthy libido. What a bunch of wankers, these Calvinists. Anything becomes a "principle," not a law, no, heaven forbid. Be like us, imitate us, if you can, if you're called. They tire me so, BJ.
Our alone time with God is an appropriate time to let it all hangout. Our goal is to give the best example how to live a stable life to our children. Some emotions are good to show our children and some are only appropriate for alone time.
The flip side of always expressing your emotions....it never dealing with your emotions at all because you never learned to express them in a healthy manner... causing you to act out and sin in very selfish ways that takes you from one superficial short term relationship to another... or only hyperfocus on positive emotions and not address the guilt, shame, sorrow, fear, anxiety... Repent and Believe...
I hope you know that religion and emotion go hand in hand. Religion attracts people who want to feel that ecstasy of belief and union. America is a very religious country and not unrelatedly a country that values emotion and artistic enterprise above all else.
@ShenanigansOfMannanan, Yes, that is the other ditch. Rachel is advocating for staying in the middle of the road. I like the metaphor she uses-not bulimia or anorexia, enjoying food (or in this case your emotions) with self-control.
@@patrickmcmanus1360 the Bible specifically instructs us to objectively test our emotions and thoughts to validate them or prove them to be false. Religion aside, emotions are apart of our human existence as Yahweh designed, however they are adversities that we are to overcome for His glory. People will always seek out an identity in external things.....at which point that focus becomes your religion.... your idol...your god...everything is ritual and ceremony....Self-righteousness and unwarranted piety are not exclusive to those who attend Churches or Synagogues.... it can be found in the heart of every "good person" .....
@@shenanigansofmannanan “the Bible instructs us to....” That’s just dishonest. You can’t just put this on “religion” and interpretation and practice. There’s no way a sincere believer can come out of reading either the Old or New Testament and not feel the emotional chaos of an urgent mission. You can point to a passage but that can’t outweigh everything else.
I understand some of this, but am confused with how to practice this when I have clinical depression which has a huge impact on my emotions and mood. Any ideas for this situation? Ty.
Keep reading God's Word, praying and attending a bible believing church. I suffered with depression for over 30 years it was not until I surrendered all to God that I was loosed of it. We can only have renewed minds in Christ. It may sound harsh but you should repent for not believing Jesus IS enough. He IS enough put all of your trust in Him alone not so called "experts", family, friends etc. I love this story of redemption. Luke 8:26- 39 26 And they arrived at the country of the Gadarenes, which is over against Galilee. 27 And when he went forth to land, there met him out of the city a certain man, which had devils long time, and ware no clothes, neither abode in any house, but in the tombs. 28 When he saw Jesus, he cried out, and fell down before him, and with a loud voice said, What have I to do with thee, Jesus, thou Son of God most high? I beseech thee, torment me not. 29 (For he had commanded the unclean spirit to come out of the man. For oftentimes it had caught him: and he was kept bound with chains and in fetters; and he brake the bands, and was driven of the devil into the wilderness.) 30 And Jesus asked him, saying, What is thy name? And he said, Legion: because many devils were entered into him. 31 And they besought him that he would not command them to go out into the deep. 32 And there was there an herd of many swine feeding on the mountain: and they besought him that he would suffer them to enter into them. And he suffered them. 33 Then went the devils out of the man, and entered into the swine: and the herd ran violently down a steep place into the lake, and were choked. 34 When they that fed them saw what was done, they fled, and went and told it in the city and in the country. 35 Then they went out to see what was done; and came to Jesus, and found the man, out of whom the devils were departed, sitting at the feet of Jesus, clothed, and in his right mind: and they were afraid. 36 They also which saw it told them by what means he that was possessed of the devils was healed. 37 Then the whole multitude of the country of the Gadarenes round about besought him to depart from them; for they were taken with great fear: and he went up into the ship, and returned back again. 38 Now the man out of whom the devils were departed besought him that he might be with him: but Jesus sent him away, saying, 39 Return to thine own house, and shew how great things God hath done unto thee. And he went his way, and published throughout the whole city how great things Jesus had done unto him.
@@GodsgalMN When I was battling very deep depression, the "quick relief" I got was in reciting the first answer of the Heidelberg Catechism, which answers the first question: What is your only comfort in life and in death? Answer: "That I am not my own, but belong-body and soul, in life and in death- to my faithful Savior, Jesus Christ. He has fully paid for all my sins with his precious blood, and has set me free from the tyranny of the devil. He also watches over me in such a way that not a hair can fall from my head without the will of my Father in heaven; in fact, all things must work together for my salvation. Because I belong to him, Christ, by his Holy Spirit, assures me of eternal life and makes me wholeheartedly willing and ready from now on to live for him." God chose us before the foundation of the world to be conformed to the image of His Son; and at the right time the Holy Spirit brought us to faith and repentance, and keeps us in the faith to the very end; and we are given absolute forgiveness of sins, and can never be separated from God no matter what happens, and no matter how badly we blow it; and we are recipients of everlasting life. We will see God and live ... forever. How utterly incomprehensibly wonderful. Thinking on this and contemplating its depth always got me out of the pit that I felt like I was in. I had to keep reminding myself of these things periodically, but that's how it is with all things pertaining to ultimate truths.
Hi Lori, there may not be any quick answer or solution immediately, but just know I struggle with my emotions too. One thing she said that i appreciated is it takes practice and it can be a process. If you are in Christ, then you are in the sanctification process and God will be faithful to get you through it. Just know that some of the "heroes" in the faith, such as Charles Spurgeon, suffered from pretty severe depression, and Christ was faithful to preserve them. Please don't just "try harder" not to be depressed. It will only make you more depressed. Continually look to Christ, who promises to be faithful to preserve you blameless until He returns. Blessings on you in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Non-military individuals know not the pain placed upon all the individuals in military families. In the evil ones splitting them of their God-given rights to getting to know each other in family in expressing intimate closeness in true self-awareness between them
Emotional control is a great skill for everyone. Why emphasize emotional control only for women? Have you ever met a man that lost control of his emotions or anger?
Bam light bulb moment, love God with all your heart, we love him because he first loved us... Ugh how can I be so slow on the up take... It's basically saying Love God as he loved us... Or give up your life as Christ gave up his because that's what it means to love. Totally even unto death. (Sharing this for my own notes as I don't have pen and paper with me.)
Three observations: 1: Wilson goes straight to “So it’s like sexual frigidity versus repression.” Lots of focus on that “sexual availability” thing from him. 2. If women are gullible, why are we listening to Rachel Jankovic? 3. Rachel is saying women are easy to control next to the man who has been controlling her for decades.
It's odd she used eating disorders as an example because eating disorders aren't about food at their root, but are actually a way to control your emotions. Doug then used sexual repression...which is often at it's root caused when a woman is repressing a lot of trauma and subsequent emotions. I agree with this topic and she had a lot of really good stuff to say, but these examples were odd.
I agree. I struggled for years with emotions, when really, I had been through a lot of unprocessed trauma. Learning to deal with my feelings saved my life. So did learning to live myself.
This is what happens when you let women teach each other theology in so called “women Bible studies”. They should instead be teaching each other to be self controlled and a good wife to their husband.
I think this is very unproductive. For most people their emotions are a symptom of some frustration in their lives. Teaching people merely control and not analysis is reinforcing the bad life choices that make people so emotional. Whether that is self respect, respecting your personal boundaries, or other general life choices that are incompatible with these things. Living in harmony with God is living a life of dignity and self respect. I don't think Christians teach this enough. When you force yourself into a situation or a relationship that isn't harmonious with your soul, God sends you a message and that is your emotions. You're teaching people essentially to ignore this message. I mean why?
Would you agree that bringing the emotions to God is a much better approach than simply expressing them out and asking the world to process them for you? God has given us our emotions as a gift, and when we don’t properly receive gifts, all manner of unrighteousness can ensue.
@@duffy3214 I certainly agree we have a responsibility to at least make an effort to thoughtfully process our emotion. Life is complicated and many of us aren’t aware of what’s actually bothering us. A lot of it happens subconsciously, so some of it will be processed out loud with other people. We have patterns that were taught to us as children and some of it is beyond our control. Of course relationships are an opportunity for learning about ourselves and growing and sometimes it involves heated emotions. Making a habit of forcing others to process your emotions for you is definitely not ideal - at some point it’s abusive, yes. I’m personally not very emotional, and I do think we have prized “emotionality” over “communicating” well. If we bring emotions AND good communication skills to our relationships that I would say is ideal. Bringing our emotions to God I don’t think is what He intended - He intended them to be used down here on earth to communicate with our fellow humans. They do tell us something important though....
@@duffy3214 I think sometimes people confuse “emotions” and “communication”. Emotions don’t help us much if we can’t properly process and identify them and communicate. Being “in touch” with your emotions kind of doesn’t help you or others in the long run if you can’t communicate to others what you’re going through. If it just comes out all raw nothing gets resolved - it just breeds conflict and frustration.
Seems to me the church as and very little to say about families health Dynamics ( work and family , spousal relationship, etc..) there more worried about outcomes then being proactive, such as for most part looking the other way on family issues , and being most pastors are ill fitted to give any family therapy or advice or Just Don't care? If your in a happy marriage or not, its just that you and spouse avoid divorce at all costs then being proactive
I have a 2-year-old, and he was pretty good until he got exposed to another kid that rubbed off onto him. This kid (who is just a couple months older) would make these really loud fit-throwing noises. And now our son does that when he doesn't get what he wants. We've been spanking him when he throws those kinds of fits. But we've found it challenging to undo what's been done. Any tips?
Good discussion but I would have liked it to be more nuanced. Many people in the past had huge issues of stuffing down their emotions and not talking at all about the shameful things. That was bad also. Also it is not only emotions but are thinking can be wrong. So it is not just our thinking vs, gospel truth but outlet thoughts that can change often slso. Finally , yes the reason or a reason one is mean could be that my parents were mean. It is not an excuse but just an acknowledgment of a psychological reason behind why I do what I do. Surely my parents could have their own reasons like they were also raised by mean parents. We can go beyond these reasons and be nicer parents but our families of origin do create strong drives good and bad in us.
This is all wrong, we don’t “control” emotions. We however can learn how to process our emotions in a healthy and appropriate way. We should learn how to do this from our parents but if our parents repress or “control” emotions, they end up shaming us for even having emotions which in turn creates emotionally dysregulated people. People really need to learn how to listen to their emotions and align their feelings with God’s word. The worst thing you can teach a child is to be ashamed of having negative emotions.
@@stegokitty yes I believe it is because the core issue of all addictions, personality disorders and even suicidal thinking comes from the inability to handle negative emotions in a healthy way. Shaming a child that they are bad for having negative emotions teaches them that their core self is bad and wrong. This sets the stage for immense suffering and dysfunction in life.
@@happycamper3561 I see, so not warning them of the dangers of sin, and of the judgement of God against it is less important than giving them a balanced view of their emotions?
Oh and we do need to get our emotions out. That is true. But in proper ways and places. Not to everyone and everywhere. And it is okay to talk about us in Christ which as they said not what this world does. The world is interested talking about us as we made. Sins are okay etc. oh and we need empathy and sympathy. I am a chaplain and have studied these things. Empathy and sympathy are right in different ways and situations.
Do you notice the absence of the JOY OF THE LORD? There is no light of life in her eyes, nor in the messages she puts out. Ever. For years now. Straight out of the gate, odd exchanges and lack of eye contact between father & daughter. Rejection and pain there. God created us, including our emotions, and saw that it was good! It's normal and ok for a mother to acknowledge that she has experienced a frustrating day raising children, and then to be plastering them with a thousand kisses the next day! I pray for her to get out from under this condemnation and quit riding someone else's roller coaster. "Radical self-indulgence" is clearly wrong, and so is "tell your emotions to choke themselves."
Okay one more Paul usually does not use flesh to equal me as a whole person. In short yes I do need to know what true self love is but that means obeying Christ and humbly serving God and others. I think if we just take Paul use of flesh in Ephesians 5 and just say we do not need to learn how to self love then we are saying that what I am doing is always loving to myself even if what I am doing is sin. I do not think that is what Paul would argue.
@Genesis 12:3 = Matthew 25:31-46 Abraham God's Friend Jesus the Christ goats sheep Matthew 6:20-21. (20. But lay up for yourselves treasures in Heaven...(21. For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. God bless you!!!
The initial step in moving from believing in Gods word to actually attempting to do it, is remembering the gospel, trusting in Jesus, and repenting from your sin. Acknowledging and denying yourself and Admitting that Jesus is THE way, THE truth, and THE life. God calls himself “I AM” for a reason. It’s because He IS truth. He determines the very fabric of reality. And His word IS true. That first initial step involves DENYING yourself, putting your flesh and evil desires to death, and picking up your cross to follow Jesus. If you are listening to Worldly people(reminder, who are living in sin and darkness and in rebellion from God naturally) and their messages, they will tell you the same **subtly deceitful** message Satan told Eve in the Garden: “Did God really say?” And basically “you won’t die” calling God a liar. But Satan is the father of lies and anyone living in sin who has not trusted In Christ and repented of their sins, is also a liar. Those people are children of the devil and do not know God so they do not know Truth. But we believe them and refuse to come to God because we have pride. We think we know better because we love our sin but the truth is we are believing a lie when we listen to the messages of worldly people. The truth is we love our sin more than we love truth and the truth is we worship ourselves and our feelings more than we worship God and truth in His word. These people breathing out lies don’t have to be deliberately lying to be saying something that is completely opposite of the truth. But who are you going to trust? Your flesh and the children of Satan or are you going to deny yourself and worship the God who created you? We must decrease so Jesus can increase. Humble yourself and repent from your sin. You’re not a good person. Your FEELINGS are NOT truth. Make every man a liar and God be true. That includes yourself. You are a liar who is self deceived if you really live the worlds message so much. Wake up and trust in Jesus. Repent from your sin. For his burden and yolk is light. The truth will set you free. Jesus is the truth and so is every word He speaks. That means the Bible and the commands in it are true.
Spontaneous AllMightY YesUS Christ love is not a sin, unless heard in misunderstanding, or stolen of by a sinner, for their misplaced self-defining revenge usuages
Hm. If women are the ones with the problems “controlling their emotions,” please explain why the majority of domestic abuse victims are women and the majority of domestic abuse perpetrators are men. Also, why are all the explosive wars carried out by mostly men? What about the rape thing and women having to walk on eggshells and be careful not to ever tell their husbands “no” to sex so that they wont cheat on them? Or is all this behavior from men actually premeditated and actually not their emotional issues? 🤔
Eh-hem...men need emotional control as well. Paul specifically tackles men and their anger. All believers need mature self-control - you could say that is the mark of an elder as mentioned in Titus 2.
The lie of Christ and or any God for that matter has and will always make the world less than. The truth is that we only get this one life. All the eons before your birth will be exactly like all the eons after your death. So forcing someone to give birth, or dictate who they can love and marry or who they want to be while here makes no sense. The only heaven we humans will ever get is if we work together to create it and the cults of religions will always stand in the way. Because the world will always be hopeless and less than with the belief in Christ or any other God! Why take responsibility to make the world better when a magically invisible being is going to solve all your problems? Why focus on making this world better when you believe something better awaits after death?
Christ says there isn't just this life, there is another, and we either spend it eternally separated from God or with Him. Because you have only lived in this short period of time in all history, how do you know you only have this one life? Why do you not believe Christ's words? He claims He existed before the world began. We can know this is true because the Bible is full of prophecies and predictions that took place hundreds of years after they were spoken, including those about Christ. The Bible never says Christians are to not be responsible anymore because we are looking to something better. And it certainly doesn't promise that God will deliver us from all our problems. On the contrary, the Bible promises that those who believe in Christ WILL suffer, but to love and serve God and those around us anyway, because that's what Jesus did. I know that a lot of Christians don't do that and so put a bad name to Christianity. But the Bible doesn't teach what you said it does. It teaches the opposite.
@@3ate4 So why would you believe a God would be incompetent? There are 2.3 billion Christians in the world which has a total population of 7.7 billion. According to the bible that means way over 5 billion people will burn in hell forever! That's not even counting those that claim to be Christians who miss the mark! Do they believe God is incompetent? The bible literally does such a poor job...I can't fathom why anyone would believe a God created it. Christians cry about abortion but 5 billion people burning in hell forever is a much more evil thought experiment!
I mean this all goes back to instilling traditional virtue. Temperance is one of the key elements and applies to emotions. Its okay to feel feelings, its not okay to let them conquer you. Same with knowledge and wisdom being a pillar of virtue. Learning techniques to empower temperance over your emotions like meditating, prayer, philosophical structured thought, rational structured thought, ect is also a virtue. It also works in reverse where conquering all emotional judgement is wrong too because you should have temperance and techniques to live authentically in the moment. All that is just mumbo jumbo to say temperance is a good thing and pretty much always has been considered so. It applies to emotions for guys and gals
The Gospel: Plain and Simple “But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent beguiled Eve through his subtilty, so your minds should be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ.” - 2 Corithians 11:3 Ask someone today if they are saved and you will most likely hear responses like these: “I have accepted Jesus into my heart.” Or “I have made him Lord of my life.” “I’ve been baptized.” “I said a prayer.” Sounds all good and churchy don’t it; but it is difficult to de-termine whether or not a person actually knows the gospel that saves them. These useless phrases don’t describe a thing about what the gospel is and has left a devastating effect of people not knowing what it is that they are saved from nor how they are saved; which leaves a more serious effect of people questioning their salvation. Let’s not muddy the simplicity of salvation that is in Christ with vague church sounding phrases that do not communicate anything. But rather present God’s word with clarity and assuredness. So here is the gospel: plain and simple. Sin was passed upon all men by one man Adam, and death is a consequence of this sin (Rom 5:12). Mankind has an eternal destiny of condemnation and wrath - Hell - because of this sin (Rom 6:23). No matter what good works one might do we are still found sinners in the sight of our Creator God. And all unrighteousness and those who follow get indignation and wrath. We cannot be found righteous for by God’s law we are found sinners (Rom 3:19-20). If we have broken even one law we are found guilty. It is for this reason of not being able to create our own righteousness and being born in a sinful flesh that we need a savior (Titus 3:5). Christ is that Savior, God manifested in the flesh, sinless, died in our place on a cross 2000 years ago. Taking upon him the wrath and judgement that was intended for us sinners. And it is through his bloodshed, burial, and resurrection on our behalf that we are able to have peace with God and forgiveness of our sins (1 Cor 15:1-4, Col 3:14). This good news is unto all but only those that believe in it are made righteous in Christ (Romans 3:22). It is then after we have heard this good news of Christ’s righteousness available to us freely, that we are sealed with the Holy Spirit and we are now part of Christ’s body the church (Eph 1:13) There is nothing that we need to do, no good works that are required, and no bad works that can separate us from our new position in Christ (Romans 8:35-39). Faith and belief in this information from God’s word is the gospel. The gospel is not accepting Jesus into your heart. The gospel is not making him lord of your life, it is not saying a prayer and it is not being baptized with water. So next time someone asks you if you are saved. Give them the clear assured answer “Yes! And let me tell you why Find more free resources at: www.graceambassadors.com
These are good, true things, but how to live it is still vacant. We are supposed to learn how to apply these things from family or discipleship, but without that present, I have had to learn how to apply these Biblical truths elsewhere. I have found practical ways to apply these truths in Joy Starts Here by Warner. Journey Groups through Deeper Walk Ministries, Empowered Wives book and podcast by Laura Doyle
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Sign up for Rachel's webinar "Get a Grip: Emotional Self-Control in an Age of Radical Self-Indulgence."
canonpress.com/self/
On empathy, how would Doug answer “cry with those who cry, mourn with those who mourn” Romans 12:15?
You can do that in sympathy with the mourner/rejoicer without being swallowed up by the emotion completely.
Says the guy who’s overweight...everybody’s got to make a buck though. Naaman’s leprosy spread to who?
The irony of telling women to get self control. Oh if the household of God would just flee from all that make merchandise of you and just open your Bible yourself!
I’m a psychological therapist working in a secular environment in the uk health service and have become exhausted with the you need more self love and know yourself better approach that is so pervasive in therapy right now. Read your book recently Rachel and it was a breath of fresh air and has encouraged me as a Christian therapist to move into Christian counselling where I can promote the idea of people counselling themselves ‘ in the Lord’ more and helping bring self-control into our emotional lives. Many thanks,
Steve in 🇬🇧
Amen
Great video, y’all! I turned to my husband and said “babe, they’re talking about me!”. Can’t tell you enough how helpful this was for me, our marriage, and my mothering. Praising God for your ministry.
She's right. 'We are born with enough love for ourselves, we don't need to learn how to better do that.' The narcissistic cultural messaging has certainly been embraced by many 'churches.'
Wait, what??? What exactly are you saying here? As in just ignore trying to be loving and kind to self?
Exactly. We have dopamine which is entirely wired to ensure love of self and self preservation. Unfortunately society has developed ways to short circuit that and creates destructive ways to get a dopamine release. But it’s still self loving to engage in those destructive measures. It’s not altruism that leads people to drugs.
A far better message than self love is self discipline. Self discipline would mean feeding your body what is good for it, exercising, etc.
Went into this thinking, "I know some people I should share this with." Left here thinking, "I need to get a grip myself."
Same! 👏🏻
I like when you have her on here. She’s a good addition to your program.
Thank you
Well, Doug helped raise her, so it's no shock that his daughter thinks clearly!
Very refreshing to hear a woman speak honestly about the sins of women!
Without mentioning any ministries I am looking for a woman's ministry that does not focus on the sins of men.
@Wildernessvoice58 I'm confused.
One way to kill the dominance of emotions is to always focus on hearing truth, and even hearing truth, no matter what sex it is coming from. If it lines up with the Scriptures, then just listen.
Amen.
@@ethanrayment8157 when the word of God and the hearing of truth and trying to focus on what is, is what you desire to see things with, then, you have emotions, but you beat your body. I had a lividly offended mom and her kids screaming me "b***ch, I'll slap you", because I expressed how I felt bad that the kids were listening to degrading and demeaning music, and I just stood right there, and talked directly to them, and as a result, it's like it spilled the wind from their sails.
Amen 🙏
Yet, America is a land where image and presentation matters. That sanitized image is usually at odds with our soul and personality. Most of us live a lie - several of them. If you want to "focus on the truth" then you have to ditch materialism and status in most cases. Most people wouldn't make that sacrifice, so a word of lies is what we get. A world that doesn't sit right with our soul. And emotions is just our soul crying out for help. Asking and begging us to live in alignment with truth. Truth is a very high order.
@@patrickmcmanus1360 I must decrease and He must increase. The closer you renew your mind in Jesus, the more you will lack reputation and popularity with the secular and secular religious system. Sadly, this had been brought into Christianity, no matter what the denomination. This is why you hear, "those evangelicals___" but yet you don't hear, "those protestants___", even though both dishonor Sola Scriptura just as much as the other in amount, although the areas may be different. The reformed dishonor it in how they don't see a need to repent because of their doctrines or systematic theology that goes against what the Scriptures truly say, and the evangelicals, who are more prone to promote their emotions and feelings before the Scriptures.
Oh my yes! My women’s church group turned into venting and commiserating victimization alternating with self glorification sessions. No help at all. Even harm.
I watched this on CanonPlus and am so glad it is available to all here as it is such a powerful learning tool to see such good Christians (yes I know it is father & daughter) as great examples to learn about such important topics!
Thank You Both 🙏
I love listening to her. It is always so convicting and sends me to prayer. We need more of this!
It's good to hear a biblical principle from a lady.
I have been so convicted lately about my inability to make an orderly home where my children are enjoyable to be around. I came from a quite rigid often joyless home and have overcorrected to the point where my home is chaotic loud messy and stressful to the point where I start yelling to get a grip on what's going on. I have to see the difference between sterile rigidity and calm self control. Because the constant chaos and overwhelm in my home can be just as joyless as the frigid micromanaged home of my childhood
@Provoked Brittany I had a father in the home. And I am married to the father of my children. But he came from a chaotic fatherless gypsy existence. We are believers but I want both of us to grow in how we parent and run our home
@@AdrienneJung.M Boy I bet your husband the fun dad ? You need your mother to come and visit for a couple weeks , she'd whip them into shape . ( kind of like Marry Poppins ?)
You are not alone momma. ❤
Start with small changes like meal times and then bed times and work your way from there. Make those times fun so the children will look forward to them. This way it’s not a total shock to the household.
@@404momii she said her home is micromanaged.
This is an issue my fiance and I are working through. I'm thrilled you're taking about it. Many women need to hear this.
Yes, I have found that if I tell women to "calm down" and "stop being so emotional" it works wonders 😆 But seriously, I completely agree that people learning control over their emotions sets them free. People are afraid to accept the concept of emotional self-control, but if we don't, it is everything and everyone else that will control us.
Great video! This was very convicting for me😮💨
In response to the notion that I need to love myself before/so that I can love others: why? Why is loving one's self the first or key step to knowing how to love others? Scripture tells us that the example we need has already been given; God first loved us and by this we know love. We can know how to love others by the (more than sufficient) example of God's love toward us (as revealed through Christ and His word). We don't need to create our own template based off of our self love.
This self love and self awareness/inventory is really goin over everyones heads here. If you cant love yourself and you dont work on self, then you can't fully help others in a healthy way. This is extremely important. Its not putting yourself on a pedestal. It's the reality of we have to live inside ourself at all times. Don't put self down. You're very important and thats the truth.
I’m struggling so much in this area, Thankyou for this video it has helped a lot
Great video! American culture and humanistic self-actualization is a big factor with emotional immaturity.
I'm in Moscow today as part of a road trip!
So good and necessary for everyone to hear!! 🙌🏻
You guys are really on to something, great talk. One thing you didn’t really go into to is the ‘how’ part of the equation. Just to say we need more control isn’t enough, we could do with practical instruction on how to maintain control over emotion, what exactly do we need to do. As a quick example: while driving we have all experienced other drivers cutting in and doing things that can potentially be quite annoying, which can get us frustrated or upset. How does one prepare and deal with situations like that in a Christ like way. I think we also have to be careful about *pretending* we are dealing with it too, or as you both said bottling things up only to face an explosion down the road.
Good question. That’s what the webinar is for! 😁This is just a teaser.
Keeping our eyes on the mission and sprinkling grace on everything helps. Because the only thing any of us deserve is damnation. That's a very difficult idea to embrace for us in America.
Also, don't camp out in the left lane and leave some room for folks to merge. That practically solves 99.9% of driving stress.
I thought the same thing. I do think there's good in just pointing out that the message heard from the world on the topic is not biblical like you would think. It's a good starting point.
I continuously reenforce these truths with our kids bc I wasn’t given any tools growing up and I suffered horrendous consequences.
Modern American women will haaaaaaate hearing this.
So many excellent points and reminders of my own shortcomings, and how I need to ask God to help me be less so that He can be more.
All humans need emotional control. We were created with the capacity to think and reason, for a purpose.
Balance is needed between emotion and reason.
Poor outcomes when one or the other dominates actions.
Great content to add to the cultural conversations 👏🏻👏🏻 just hearing this is a course correction for me. We constantly need to be reminded of truth and what we believe and how we should live 😂 we’re so forgetful!
My son and I are really close! He’s easy to get along with, but I can hardly ever have a conversation with my husband that doesn’t turn into an argument. Because everything has to be his way. He never admits he’s wrong and he can be very sarcastic, which drives me crazy! I hope I can apply your advice and not let my emotions control me. It would be great to have peace in our marriage.
Highly recommend the book "created to be his helpmeet". Remember WHY you married him. Focus on that rather than his sin. You aren't his holy spirit. Treat him with respect, love, and win him without a word!!!
@Bearthowlemew Thank you! You sound like a very wise person! God bless you!!
@ChristinewithaC just a sinner ma'am, not wise at all! Elisabeth elliots writings also might be helpful too ❤️❤️ be well my sister!
I’m so glad I found this! Thank you!
"Elijah was a man subject to passions as we are, and yet when he prayed, it didn't rain for a terrifyingly long time." Dunce Paraphrase Version
Not sure exactly what you’re driving at, but I enjoyed your paraphrase. 😄
@@kaylar3197 Thanks, sister Kayla! Just being a jackass for the kingdom. Cause someone has to do it.
Another topic I’d like to understand more of is so many women find meaning in victim hood, even imaginary or contrived.
What sort of imaginary or contrived victimhood do you mean??
Interpreting innocent situations in such a way as to be a victim. Intentionally misunderstanding someone’s comments.
@@ictkanzin5314 Oh right, what sort of comments did you make??
Sheologians has a good episode on Intersectionality
All humans love victimhood. Any opportunity to avoid responsibility and place the blame on others is appealing to all people.
psychologizing is very much the spirit of the age.
Thank you for the talk show! You and your father are doing a great job!
I've been through this whole thing for at least 20 years. How could I get help? Can I fix the mess I made? I have never been instructed in this subject specifically. I feel like God has been punishing us for our self being. Please, help me as I go through the way back.
I feel like Doug had a proud papa moment at the very end.
Males being human beings also must control their emotions also, to not become controlled by the total shut-down of real spiritually, emotional involvement, or to become obsessively consumed with the egotistical “controlling” rage-full anger. and floundering sex in relationships. And this is a primary reason in character development in worldly relationships for family, why the AllMightY hates war(s)
Wow! Great info. Now to put it into practice..... and more practice...!
I'm bewildered at all the Jezebel's complaining that their husband's don't respect them....
I don’t understand why I get angry when I see this. It must be my pride. I just don’t understand why it upsets me. Maybe because my greatest struggle is managing my emotions 🤷🏻♀️
Everyone struggle with Emotions not just women , the culture now days kids aren't disciplined enough ( not saying physically ) a lot of times they run the house or run rough shot over it, this going cause enormous amount of stress in the family.
When I grew up I had respect ,and fear of my father , he was great dad but you knew where the boundary's where.
100 years ago in the more patriarchy family dynamic , the father complained and the wife kept her mouth shut, and if the kids acted up, there was always the trip behind the woodshed with dad.
I don't think it's wise to suppress emotions, they are there for a reason, they are not a problem, they are a symptom. If we get in the habit of asking God where is the root of that overwhelming or uncomfortable emotion He will show us a heart issue that need to be dealt with weather it is a change in perspective or healing of an emotional wound. The people who have gone thru the most pain are often the most difficult to deal with because of how broken their heart is, unfortunately often in church people who have never gone thru a lot of hurt don't understand and don't know how to help but Jesus does. Don't suppress your emotions to please others, seek to heal deeply to free yourself and become more stable and peaceful. ❤
@@deliciouscolours Well said. Lots of wisdom that you wrote. However, emotional self control is something that we all need. Feelings aren't facts.
The scripture doesn't say to have emotional control but "self" control. The greatest commandment is to love with "all one's heart." Not that scripture if for unbridled emotion, but everything get Calvinized is beyond me.
Hello again, it’s been a while! I’m not sure if I understand your point here. Emotion is good, but it shouldn’t be what leads you.
@@justanotherbaptistjew5659 Hey there BJ. If I may elaborate, because these legalists fly under the radar, much like JWs do with their endless hooks and strawmen--"What? Don't you want peace?"
Our problem is said to be sin. Under that umbrella we may place death, sickness and every carnal weakness, whether of the mind (the Greek go to) or the heart (the Judaic metonymn).
We are enjoined to weep with those who weep, mourn with those who mourn, despite the many Calvinistic warnings against "empathy."
Now, should we:
1. Get angry with those who are angry
2. Get resentful with those who are resentful
3. Seeth, fume and burn with those who do so, and a zillion other human foibles of the passions?
No. But as a Jew, you ought to know the Shema by "heart."
@@justanotherbaptistjew5659 Silly me, "heart" is a synecdoche, not a metonymn. An example of metonomy would be calling Calvinists "cuffllinks." Of course, brother Wilson prefers a sweater vest.
@@duncescotus2342
I don’t think that this video is calling for all emotions to be ignored and suppressed. They even used the example of being chaste and being repressed.
I believe you might just be looking for something to attack.
@@justanotherbaptistjew5659 Well, you know what they say--the best defense is a good offense. But that's good isn't it, the appeal to a healthy libido. What a bunch of wankers, these Calvinists. Anything becomes a "principle," not a law, no, heaven forbid. Be like us, imitate us, if you can, if you're called. They tire me so, BJ.
Our alone time with God is an appropriate time to let it all hangout. Our goal is to give the best example how to live a stable life to our children. Some emotions are good to show our children and some are only appropriate for alone time.
The flip side of always expressing your emotions....it never dealing with your emotions at all because you never learned to express them in a healthy manner... causing you to act out and sin in very selfish ways that takes you from one superficial short term relationship to another... or only hyperfocus on positive emotions and not address the guilt, shame, sorrow, fear, anxiety... Repent and Believe...
I hope you know that religion and emotion go hand in hand. Religion attracts people who want to feel that ecstasy of belief and union. America is a very religious country and not unrelatedly a country that values emotion and artistic enterprise above all else.
@ShenanigansOfMannanan, Yes, that is the other ditch. Rachel is advocating for staying in the middle of the road. I like the metaphor she uses-not bulimia or anorexia, enjoying food (or in this case your emotions) with self-control.
@@patrickmcmanus1360 the Bible specifically instructs us to objectively test our emotions and thoughts to validate them or prove them to be false. Religion aside, emotions are apart of our human existence as Yahweh designed, however they are adversities that we are to overcome for His glory. People will always seek out an identity in external things.....at which point that focus becomes your religion.... your idol...your god...everything is ritual and ceremony....Self-righteousness and unwarranted piety are not exclusive to those who attend Churches or Synagogues.... it can be found in the heart of every "good person" .....
@@kaylar3197 I'm well aware of what Rachael was advocating for... but thanks for chiming in....
@@shenanigansofmannanan “the Bible instructs us to....” That’s just dishonest. You can’t just put this on “religion” and interpretation and practice. There’s no way a sincere believer can come out of reading either the Old or New Testament and not feel the emotional chaos of an urgent mission. You can point to a passage but that can’t outweigh everything else.
You love yourself more then we know - no need to pursue self love
I recommended this video to my wife... we are no longer speaking.
She should do Rachel's Bible reading challenge....
I understand some of this, but am confused with how to practice this when I have clinical depression which has a huge impact on my emotions and mood. Any ideas for this situation? Ty.
Keep reading God's Word, praying and attending a bible believing church. I suffered with depression for over 30 years it was not until I surrendered all to God that I was loosed of it. We can only have renewed minds in Christ. It may sound harsh but you should repent for not believing Jesus IS enough. He IS enough put all of your trust in Him alone not so called "experts", family, friends etc. I love this story of redemption.
Luke 8:26- 39
26 And they arrived at the country of the Gadarenes, which is over against Galilee.
27 And when he went forth to land, there met him out of the city a certain man, which had devils long time, and ware no clothes, neither abode in any house, but in the tombs.
28 When he saw Jesus, he cried out, and fell down before him, and with a loud voice said, What have I to do with thee, Jesus, thou Son of God most high? I beseech thee, torment me not.
29 (For he had commanded the unclean spirit to come out of the man. For oftentimes it had caught him: and he was kept bound with chains and in fetters; and he brake the bands, and was driven of the devil into the wilderness.)
30 And Jesus asked him, saying, What is thy name? And he said, Legion: because many devils were entered into him.
31 And they besought him that he would not command them to go out into the deep.
32 And there was there an herd of many swine feeding on the mountain: and they besought him that he would suffer them to enter into them. And he suffered them.
33 Then went the devils out of the man, and entered into the swine: and the herd ran violently down a steep place into the lake, and were choked.
34 When they that fed them saw what was done, they fled, and went and told it in the city and in the country.
35 Then they went out to see what was done; and came to Jesus, and found the man, out of whom the devils were departed, sitting at the feet of Jesus, clothed, and in his right mind: and they were afraid.
36 They also which saw it told them by what means he that was possessed of the devils was healed.
37 Then the whole multitude of the country of the Gadarenes round about besought him to depart from them; for they were taken with great fear: and he went up into the ship, and returned back again.
38 Now the man out of whom the devils were departed besought him that he might be with him: but Jesus sent him away, saying,
39 Return to thine own house, and shew how great things God hath done unto thee. And he went his way, and published throughout the whole city how great things Jesus had done unto him.
@@gbappling2405 Thank you sir. I understand. 🙏🏼
@@GodsgalMN When I was battling very deep depression, the "quick relief" I got was in reciting the first answer of the Heidelberg Catechism, which answers the first question: What is your only comfort in life and in death?
Answer: "That I am not my own, but belong-body and soul, in life and in death-
to my faithful Savior, Jesus Christ.
He has fully paid for all my sins with his precious blood,
and has set me free from the tyranny of the devil.
He also watches over me in such a way
that not a hair can fall from my head without the will of my Father in heaven;
in fact, all things must work together for my salvation.
Because I belong to him, Christ, by his Holy Spirit, assures me of eternal life
and makes me wholeheartedly willing and ready from now on to live for him."
God chose us before the foundation of the world to be conformed to the image of His Son; and at the right time the Holy Spirit brought us to faith and repentance, and keeps us in the faith to the very end; and we are given absolute forgiveness of sins, and can never be separated from God no matter what happens, and no matter how badly we blow it; and we are recipients of everlasting life. We will see God and live ... forever.
How utterly incomprehensibly wonderful.
Thinking on this and contemplating its depth always got me out of the pit that I felt like I was in.
I had to keep reminding myself of these things periodically, but that's how it is with all things pertaining to ultimate truths.
Hi Lori, there may not be any quick answer or solution immediately, but just know I struggle with my emotions too. One thing she said that i appreciated is it takes practice and it can be a process. If you are in Christ, then you are in the sanctification process and God will be faithful to get you through it. Just know that some of the "heroes" in the faith, such as Charles Spurgeon, suffered from pretty severe depression, and Christ was faithful to preserve them. Please don't just "try harder" not to be depressed. It will only make you more depressed. Continually look to Christ, who promises to be faithful to preserve you blameless until He returns. Blessings on you in Christ Jesus our Lord.
@@3ate4 Yes, I fully agree. Jesus continues to uphold me and I cling tightly to Him alone. 🙏🏼 Thank you.
Non-military individuals know not the pain placed upon all the individuals in military families. In the evil ones splitting them of their God-given rights to getting to know each other in family in expressing intimate closeness in true self-awareness between them
Men need the same self-control. I have beheld a variety of bad examples, especially from men who are "serving."
Sign me up!
Thats right us men are big and strong. The women need the emotional help.
Emotional control is a great skill for everyone. Why emphasize emotional control only for women? Have you ever met a man that lost control of his emotions or anger?
Bam light bulb moment, love
God with all your heart, we love him because he first loved us... Ugh how can I be so slow on the up take... It's basically saying Love God as he loved us... Or give up your life as Christ gave up his because that's what it means to love. Totally even unto death. (Sharing this for my own notes as I don't have pen and paper with me.)
Three observations:
1: Wilson goes straight to “So it’s like sexual frigidity versus repression.” Lots of focus on that “sexual availability” thing from him.
2. If women are gullible, why are we listening to Rachel Jankovic?
3. Rachel is saying women are easy to control next to the man who has been controlling her for decades.
Way to prove the point
2. Titus 2 requires the older women to teach the younger women to obey their husbands
It's odd she used eating disorders as an example because eating disorders aren't about food at their root, but are actually a way to control your emotions.
Doug then used sexual repression...which is often at it's root caused when a woman is repressing a lot of trauma and subsequent emotions.
I agree with this topic and she had a lot of really good stuff to say, but these examples were odd.
Maybe because they aren’t actually educated in how to deal with the issues they are discussing.
@@brentives4688
Food is also necessary for survival.
I agree. I struggled for years with emotions, when really, I had been through a lot of unprocessed trauma. Learning to deal with my feelings saved my life. So did learning to live myself.
@@brentives4688 yes, there's a difference between biblical, or healthy self control, and repression.
This is what happens when you let women teach each other theology in so called “women Bible studies”. They should instead be teaching each other to be self controlled and a good wife to their husband.
@@1Whipperin pretty much the whole of what their meetings are about
I think this is very unproductive. For most people their emotions are a symptom of some frustration in their lives. Teaching people merely control and not analysis is reinforcing the bad life choices that make people so emotional. Whether that is self respect, respecting your personal boundaries, or other general life choices that are incompatible with these things. Living in harmony with God is living a life of dignity and self respect. I don't think Christians teach this enough. When you force yourself into a situation or a relationship that isn't harmonious with your soul, God sends you a message and that is your emotions. You're teaching people essentially to ignore this message. I mean why?
Very good post. Emotions provide information. What are they telling you?
Would you agree that bringing the emotions to God is a much better approach than simply expressing them out and asking the world to process them for you? God has given us our emotions as a gift, and when we don’t properly receive gifts, all manner of unrighteousness can ensue.
@@toomuchinformation TY!
@@duffy3214 I certainly agree we have a responsibility to at least make an effort to thoughtfully process our emotion. Life is complicated and many of us aren’t aware of what’s actually bothering us. A lot of it happens subconsciously, so some of it will be processed out loud with other people. We have patterns that were taught to us as children and some of it is beyond our control. Of course relationships are an opportunity for learning about ourselves and growing and sometimes it involves heated emotions. Making a habit of forcing others to process your emotions for you is definitely not ideal - at some point it’s abusive, yes. I’m personally not very emotional, and I do think we have prized “emotionality” over “communicating” well. If we bring emotions AND good communication skills to our relationships that I would say is ideal. Bringing our emotions to God I don’t think is what He intended - He intended them to be used down here on earth to communicate with our fellow humans. They do tell us something important though....
@@duffy3214 I think sometimes people confuse “emotions” and “communication”. Emotions don’t help us much if we can’t properly process and identify them and communicate. Being “in touch” with your emotions kind of doesn’t help you or others in the long run if you can’t communicate to others what you’re going through. If it just comes out all raw nothing gets resolved - it just breeds conflict and frustration.
What translation of the bible is the most accurate and less usurped?
F in the chat for all our fallen brothers who showed this to their girlfriends and wives
Yes, husbands that are new to the role...DO NOT RECOMMEND OR SHOW THIS YOUR YOUR BRIDE!!
F
Why not? Women sin too
Seems to me the church as and very little to say about families health Dynamics ( work and family , spousal relationship, etc..) there more worried about outcomes then being proactive, such as for most part looking the other way on family issues , and being most pastors are ill fitted to give any family therapy or advice or Just Don't care?
If your in a happy marriage or not, its just that you and spouse avoid divorce at all costs then being proactive
3:29-3:30 It’s a horrible place to be a husband as well!!
I have a 2-year-old, and he was pretty good until he got exposed to another kid that rubbed off onto him. This kid (who is just a couple months older) would make these really loud fit-throwing noises. And now our son does that when he doesn't get what he wants. We've been spanking him when he throws those kinds of fits. But we've found it challenging to undo what's been done. Any tips?
Throw fits back at him? It beats spanking, and he'll learn an important life lesson early--parents be crazy.
Anyone have any Biblical advice?
@@chrisctlr "Sing psalms." Or "hymns."
I am not qualified to be giving advice, but Doug and his wife have some excellent parenting books you could check out.
@@kaylar3197 I've read them. Might have to reread them. I don't recall if they mentioned my specific situation.
Good discussion but I would have liked it to be more nuanced. Many people in the past had huge issues of stuffing down their emotions and not talking at all about the shameful things. That was bad also. Also it is not only emotions but are thinking can be wrong. So it is not just our thinking vs, gospel truth but outlet thoughts that can change often slso. Finally , yes the reason or a reason one is mean could be that my parents were mean. It is not an excuse but just an acknowledgment of a psychological reason behind why I do what I do. Surely my parents could have their own reasons like they were also raised by mean parents. We can go beyond these reasons and be nicer parents but our families of origin do create strong drives good and bad in us.
This is all wrong, we don’t “control” emotions. We however can learn how to process our emotions in a healthy and appropriate way. We should learn how to do this from our parents but if our parents repress or “control” emotions, they end up shaming us for even having emotions which in turn creates emotionally dysregulated people. People really need to learn how to listen to their emotions and align their feelings with God’s word. The worst thing you can teach a child is to be ashamed of having negative emotions.
Didn’t James tell us to be slow to anger. Also do not let the sun set on your anger. That is controlling your angry emotions.
//The worst thing you can teach a child is to be ashamed of having negative emotions.//
Really? That's the worst thing you can teach your child?
Wow.
@@stegokitty yes I believe it is because the core issue of all addictions, personality disorders and even suicidal thinking comes from the inability to handle negative emotions in a healthy way. Shaming a child that they are bad for having negative emotions teaches them that their core self is bad and wrong. This sets the stage for immense suffering and dysfunction in life.
@@happycamper3561 I see, so not warning them of the dangers of sin, and of the judgement of God against it is less important than giving them a balanced view of their emotions?
@@happycamper3561 Thank you for this comment. I despair of the others in this thread.
Oh and we do need to get our emotions out. That is true. But in proper ways and places. Not to everyone and everywhere. And it is okay to talk about us in Christ which as they said not what this world does. The world is interested talking about us as we made. Sins are okay etc. oh and we need empathy and sympathy. I am a chaplain and have studied these things. Empathy and sympathy are right in different ways and situations.
Do you notice the absence of the JOY OF THE LORD? There is no light of life in her eyes, nor in the messages she puts out. Ever. For years now.
Straight out of the gate, odd exchanges and lack of eye contact between father & daughter. Rejection and pain there.
God created us, including our emotions, and saw that it was good! It's normal and ok for a mother to acknowledge that she has experienced a frustrating day raising children, and then to be plastering them with a thousand kisses the next day! I pray for her to get out from under this condemnation and quit riding someone else's roller coaster. "Radical self-indulgence" is clearly wrong, and so is "tell your emotions to choke themselves."
Doug is the same way when he does videos with his wife
let’s go woug dilson!
Okay one more Paul usually does not use flesh to equal me as a whole person. In short yes I do need to know what true self love is but that means obeying Christ and humbly serving God and others. I think if we just take Paul use of flesh in Ephesians 5 and just say we do not need to learn how to self love then we are saying that what I am doing is always loving to myself even if what I am doing is sin. I do not think that is what Paul would argue.
@Genesis 12:3 = Matthew 25:31-46
Abraham God's Friend
Jesus the Christ
goats sheep
Matthew 6:20-21. (20. But lay up for
yourselves treasures in Heaven...(21.
For where your treasure is, there will
your heart be also. God bless you!!!
The initial step in moving from believing in Gods word to actually attempting to do it, is remembering the gospel, trusting in Jesus, and repenting from your sin. Acknowledging and denying yourself and Admitting that Jesus is THE way, THE truth, and THE life. God calls himself “I AM” for a reason. It’s because He IS truth. He determines the very fabric of reality. And His word IS true.
That first initial step involves DENYING yourself, putting your flesh and evil desires to death, and picking up your cross to follow Jesus. If you are listening to Worldly people(reminder, who are living in sin and darkness and in rebellion from God naturally) and their messages, they will tell you the same **subtly deceitful** message Satan told Eve in the Garden: “Did God really say?” And basically “you won’t die” calling God a liar. But Satan is the father of lies and anyone living in sin who has not trusted In Christ and repented of their sins, is also a liar. Those people are children of the devil and do not know God so they do not know Truth. But we believe them and refuse to come to God because we have pride. We think we know better because we love our sin but the truth is we are believing a lie when we listen to the messages of worldly people. The truth is we love our sin more than we love truth and the truth is we worship ourselves and our feelings more than we worship God and truth in His word. These people breathing out lies don’t have to be deliberately lying to be saying something that is completely opposite of the truth. But who are you going to trust? Your flesh and the children of Satan or are you going to deny yourself and worship the God who created you? We must decrease so Jesus can increase. Humble yourself and repent from your sin. You’re not a good person. Your FEELINGS are NOT truth. Make every man a liar and God be true. That includes yourself. You are a liar who is self deceived if you really live the worlds message so much. Wake up and trust in Jesus. Repent from your sin. For his burden and yolk is light. The truth will set you free. Jesus is the truth and so is every word He speaks. That means the Bible and the commands in it are true.
The snake in Genesis is not Satan
Spontaneous AllMightY YesUS Christ love is not a sin, unless heard in misunderstanding, or stolen of by a sinner, for their misplaced self-defining revenge usuages
I DID IT IM FIST. HI MR.WILSON!
Hm. If women are the ones with the problems “controlling their emotions,” please explain why the majority of domestic abuse victims are women and the majority of domestic abuse perpetrators are men.
Also, why are all the explosive wars carried out by mostly men?
What about the rape thing and women having to walk on eggshells and be careful not to ever tell their husbands “no” to sex so that they wont cheat on them?
Or is all this behavior from men actually premeditated and actually not their emotional issues? 🤔
The majority of victims are in fact men
Self love vs selfless love, they can't both be biblical.
❤️
Hysteria comes from the Greek word for uterus. Just like vent your spleen or don't get your liver in an uproar. 😅
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
In a sense, should Christians have a bit of Stocism? Channel your inner Spock.
Eh-hem...men need emotional control as well. Paul specifically tackles men and their anger. All believers need mature self-control - you could say that is the mark of an elder as mentioned in Titus 2.
Mr. Wilson is so f*cking based!!!
It's just terrible you even have to say these things......but thanks.....🙄
😀😀😀😀
comment for algorithm
As the scriptures say “the best woman is still worse than the worst man”
The lie of Christ and or any God for that matter has and will always make the world less than. The truth is that we only get this one life. All the eons before your birth will be exactly like all the eons after your death. So forcing someone to give birth, or dictate who they can love and marry or who they want to be while here makes no sense. The only heaven we humans will ever get is if we work together to create it and the cults of religions will always stand in the way. Because the world will always be hopeless and less than with the belief in Christ or any other God! Why take responsibility to make the world better when a magically invisible being is going to solve all your problems? Why focus on making this world better when you believe something better awaits after death?
Christ says there isn't just this life, there is another, and we either spend it eternally separated from God or with Him. Because you have only lived in this short period of time in all history, how do you know you only have this one life? Why do you not believe Christ's words? He claims He existed before the world began. We can know this is true because the Bible is full of prophecies and predictions that took place hundreds of years after they were spoken, including those about Christ. The Bible never says Christians are to not be responsible anymore because we are looking to something better. And it certainly doesn't promise that God will deliver us from all our problems. On the contrary, the Bible promises that those who believe in Christ WILL suffer, but to love and serve God and those around us anyway, because that's what Jesus did. I know that a lot of Christians don't do that and so put a bad name to Christianity. But the Bible doesn't teach what you said it does. It teaches the opposite.
@@3ate4 What do you believe the ultimate purpose of the Bible is?
@@royhiggins7270 to reveal God's truth, the absolute truth, to all of us.
@@3ate4 So why would you believe a God would be incompetent? There are 2.3 billion Christians in the world which has a total population of 7.7 billion. According to the bible that means way over 5 billion people will burn in hell forever! That's not even counting those that claim to be Christians who miss the mark! Do they believe God is incompetent? The bible literally does such a poor job...I can't fathom why anyone would believe a God created it. Christians cry about abortion but 5 billion people burning in hell forever is a much more evil thought experiment!
Yeah...I have never got any feedback from that one. I wonder why?
I mean this all goes back to instilling traditional virtue. Temperance is one of the key elements and applies to emotions. Its okay to feel feelings, its not okay to let them conquer you. Same with knowledge and wisdom being a pillar of virtue. Learning techniques to empower temperance over your emotions like meditating, prayer, philosophical structured thought, rational structured thought, ect is also a virtue. It also works in reverse where conquering all emotional judgement is wrong too because you should have temperance and techniques to live authentically in the moment.
All that is just mumbo jumbo to say temperance is a good thing and pretty much always has been considered so. It applies to emotions for guys and gals
The Gospel:
Plain and
Simple
“But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent
beguiled Eve through his subtilty, so your
minds should be corrupted from the simplicity
that is in Christ.” - 2 Corithians 11:3
Ask someone today if they are saved and
you will most likely hear responses like these:
“I have accepted Jesus into my heart.” Or “I
have made him Lord of my life.” “I’ve been
baptized.” “I said a prayer.” Sounds all good
and churchy don’t it; but it is difficult to de-termine whether or not a person actually
knows the gospel that saves them. These useless phrases don’t describe a thing about what
the gospel is and has left a devastating effect
of people not knowing what it is that they are
saved from nor how they are saved; which
leaves a more serious effect of people questioning their salvation.
Let’s not muddy the simplicity of salvation that is in Christ with vague church
sounding phrases that do not communicate
anything. But rather present God’s word with
clarity and assuredness. So here is the gospel:
plain and simple.
Sin was passed upon all men by one man
Adam, and death is a consequence of this sin
(Rom 5:12). Mankind has an eternal destiny of
condemnation and wrath - Hell - because of
this sin (Rom 6:23). No matter what good
works one might do we are still found sinners
in the sight of our Creator God. And all unrighteousness and those who follow get indignation and wrath. We cannot be found
righteous for by God’s law we are found sinners (Rom 3:19-20). If we have broken even
one law we are found guilty.
It is for this reason of not being able to
create our own righteousness and being born
in a sinful flesh that we need a savior (Titus
3:5). Christ is that Savior, God manifested in
the flesh, sinless, died in our place on a cross
2000 years ago. Taking upon him the wrath
and judgement that was intended for us sinners. And it is through his bloodshed, burial,
and resurrection on our behalf that we are
able to have peace with God and forgiveness
of our sins (1 Cor 15:1-4, Col 3:14). This good
news is unto all but only those that believe in
it are made righteous in Christ (Romans
3:22).
It is then after we have heard this good
news of Christ’s righteousness available to us freely, that we are sealed with the Holy Spirit
and we are now part of Christ’s body the
church (Eph 1:13)
There is nothing that we need to do, no
good works that are required, and no bad
works that can separate us from our new position in Christ (Romans 8:35-39).
Faith and belief in this information from
God’s word is the gospel.
The gospel is not accepting Jesus into your
heart. The gospel is not making him lord of
your life, it is not saying a prayer and it is not
being baptized with water.
So next time someone asks you if you are
saved. Give them the clear assured answer
“Yes! And let me tell you why
Find more free resources at:
www.graceambassadors.com
These are good, true things, but how to live it is still vacant. We are supposed to learn how to apply these things from family or discipleship, but without that present, I have had to learn how to apply these Biblical truths elsewhere. I have found practical ways to apply these truths in Joy Starts Here by Warner. Journey Groups through Deeper Walk Ministries, Empowered Wives book and podcast by Laura Doyle
Laura Doyle is great! I agree a lot of Christian resources don’t actually walk you through how to apply the principles.