"I thought you didnt love me anymore" is what my spouse said. I would love for you to address the "I made a mistake" comment the cheating spouse often gives. At times it infuriates me. Mistake? It was a deliberate choice!
My now ex-wife said so many things that you put in this video. "I told you I wasn't happy." "I found someone who treated me well, someone who gave me attention." She even convinced her family to justify her actions by telling the story as "he tried controlling her so that's why they got divorced." Leaving out that SMALL detail of her affair with a married man who's almost a decade older with 3 kids and a wife of his own. It's sad the tangled web she's weaved and now even brought her family into the lies. One day the entire truth will come out and I will people will see the true colors of what's been going on. To everyone going through this mess, DO NOT try and fight them with truth because all of it will fall upon deaf ears! They might say some horrible things about you that aren't true to try and justify their actions but you need to stay strong and let them say what they want!
My husband justifies it by saying it was just sex since it was with prostitutes, multiple prostitutes. He believes it's less offensive because it wasn't with a single person he had developed an attachment to. I remind him that the effects of the infidelity are equalling traumatizing no matter which route of betrayl was taken.
In our home country, prostitution is - unfortunately - recognized and legalized as "sexual service". It was therefore very easy for my husband to view and label his visits to prostitutes (the more exclusive ones from the higher price segment) simply as a "business transaction", as using a "service". From his point of view, none of this had anything to do with our relationship or with me or with cheating. He didn't want to be romantically involved with another woman, didn't want to be courting another woman at the risk of being rejected anyway, he didn't want to risk losing our relationship, he wanted to make sure he had sex with other women on certain occasions , and not with any but with those who optically turned him on. In fact, I'm even a little bit grateful to him for deciding against going romantically with other women and instead "just wanting sex." It's still deeply hurtful, of course, and we're working hard. But it could have been a lot worse. He always chose me and our relationship, was always there for me and by my side. I love him very much and now I feel his love for me very intensely again.
Just a couple of his responses ... “lots of people have affairs” “it was just sex” “I didn’t want to do it” (but did it for 2 years) “the things I told her were lies. I only said them to get a response from her” “she was just a friend” “all I wanted was just friendship from her” ......
My husband said, “it’s just sex, nothing else.” But he promised his mistress to divorce me, that he wants to he with her, she’s the love of her life, blah blah blah.
"I thought you had lost interest in me". " it just happened" "she came on to me". " we were friends with similar music interests ". "I should never have given her a hug".
Now divorced for 6 months but previously married for 36 years. He was having affairs starting back 32 years. Claims ‘we got married too young’, ‘we had good times, bad times, and this is where we ended up’, or ‘I never felt like a grown up.’ All a bunch of nonsense.
After a 9 month affair my husband says he was being childish and immature. It’s is an extremely sad example of how he isn’t ready to take full responsibility for how harmful his actions have been.
My wife and I had a good marriage for many years. Unfortunately, the villification actually started many years ago with hidden resentment, so add limerence and the moral justifications are very strong indeed. Equally unfortunately, as a betrayed husband who has a good relationship with God and an unblurred memory, I have a decent sense of self worth. I tend to overcorrect the euphemisms in the moment so much as to be unfair.
I'm in the exact same boat with my husband. I thought we had a great marriage and had no idea he was building resentment towards me over the last couple years, then add the limerince withbhis affair partner and his justifications and I seriously don't know who he is anymore or how he got to this point...
After 38 years of marriage, my ex-husband said he was surprised that I was “ taking it so hard “ that he wanted a divorce so he could marry his AP. He just didn’t think it should bother me that much!
My husband doesn’t call it sex addiction, he uses the term unwanted behavior, because he didn’t ask for the childhood trauma that led him into unwanted behaviors.
"I did it because it was expected of me", "it was only one kiss and one hug", "I did because I felt bad about myself", "I didn't tell you about it for 15 years because I knew it would hurt you", " I was going to tell you". "I always have deleted my texts"
In the beginnings of dealing with this affair. My wife has been giving me all the gaslight reasons: I didn't mean for it to happen, I love but I'm not in love with you, and more to this topic the pain I caused her the last few years of our marriage. Completely negating the fact I was so angry because I would catch her in other lies before this and she kept promising not to do it again.
My husband justified his emotional affair with our former nanny in a number of ways; he made me out to be a non supportive wife all of a sudden (prior to the affair he often commented on what a wonderful partner I was), he claimed he had to sneak around with his affair partner because I gave him no other choice, said I forbid him to see her (I did that after all but one of their secret rendezvous). It's been just over a year since it ended. Although he admits it was wrong to lie to me, he still claims he was never attracted to her.
My husband continues to contact his AP even though we are 6 months from dday and he has been pretending to try to work on our marriage. When I ask him about it, he'll say, "it was nothing" "I'm just trying to be friendly" etc. When I say there is absolutely no reason other than trying to continue the relationship he says, "it was a mistake" Too much double talk and BS. I've tried really hard but I don't think I should have to be his choice because she won't get involved again. Im width more than that. It crushes my soul knowing that my 23 year serial cheating husband chooses me last every time. Im completely broken right now.
LJRZ Bunny I am sorry that your heart is broken. Remember that God heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3). He is also near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). May you feel His love and peace in the days ahead.
Been there far too long... all infidelity is horrific, but the one that is active after it is discovered, no matter how they minimize or justify, is indescribable. You don't deserve it. I am praying for you to get the best help for your own healing. He may or may not get on board and that hurts too. I am so sorry. You are in my heart.
My husband refuses to admit he's having an affair. They are "just friends." Even though he takes her out every Thursday. They park at a park then "car pool" together to the bar or restaurant or whatever they're doing. They buy each gifts. He sends her flowers because her own husband doesn't & my husband feels bad for her. She says she has to remain his friend because he's going through marrital problems. Well we weren't having major problems till she came along. She told my husband that if I loved him I would let him do whatever he wanted. WHAT?!?!?! I am now known as the Warden among his new friends that they hang with. I am not aloud to interfere with his "alone time" which is his time with her or I'm being controlling.
“We had been friends for a long time” “ we would argue all the time and she would tell what I wanted to here “ “We were just talking at first” I didn’t know that you meant to stop talking to her for good” “I just wanted to see how she was doing” He justifies everything with us going through a hard time when he wouldn’t make time for me because he was tired from work and didn’t have time for us, but all along he had time for the other women... multiple women.....
My husband likes to use the term "stepped out" rather than cheating or betrayal. He also constantly calls it a "mistake" falling "in love" with another woman and going back and forth for months isn't a mistake. I am starting to think he will never take true accountability for his actions, he thinks admitting what he did to me is accountability and he should just be able to tell me what he is doing or where he is going and I should just believe him, he shouldn't have to show me anything cuz that's controlling... well you're right you don't have to show me anything but don't expect me to trust you either
My favorite, YOU WERE ALWAYS BUSY WITH THE KIDS & DIDN'T HAVE TIME FOR ME. While he lost sight of the fact his minimal education allowed him jobs providing only minimal hourly rates, keeping us at poverty level income. I had to work full time while raising both kids. He did nothing to further his education. None of his statement is true. We had a very ACTIVE sex life, until he damaged our wedding vows by cheating with a hooker at as bachelor party AFTER married 3 yrs. He's been lying about this & drip feeding me partial truths since Feb 2022 D-day. We hired a LMFT for counseling. She knew we were seeing her bcuz of his LUST addiction, & she had the AUDACITY (more like indecency) to wear a lower cut blouse revealing more cleavage with each successive appointment. He could not focus on any topics while focusing on her. Big mistake. We're DONE. 36 yr marriage is ending.
She is just a friend. She is known as the frat brother. She is our sorority sister so to him it is the frat brother to defuse the situation. He is with the frat brother now. She is continued to be know as the frat brother to others that do not know what I know. We divorced in March 2019.
I heard, "well you went to a guy's house to do his job resume for him." I told my husband I was going to a guy's house to do his resume in order to get a job with my husband. And they ended up working and carpooling together. I don't know why that gets thrown in my face in order to justify an emotional affair he had with someone but internet.
First it was because I filed for divorce, then needing attention he wasn't getting and now it's because he feels I cheated on him years ago. Which I did not. I wouldn't have had time if I wanted to but I'm now being taught that if I bring it to, he'll shoot me down with anything to keep my quiet about it. There is some excuse everytime I bring it up when he asks what's wrong with me if I'm having a hard say or these unrelenting triggers.
I caught my wife of 24 years (3 kids) kissing another man in Aug 2019. She told me she was already divorced from me, even though neither of us had obtained lawyers and were still living together (I thought we were on the road to reconciliation). She later admitted to (2) more men, all physical, in earlier 2019. Final straw, shared that she was intimate with another man (2) years into our marriage, 1997. EXCUSES: We married so young - What did you expect, I was lonely - It was just sex - It was only three times (with each man) - We are already divorced - I planned on divorcing you for at least four years - I was going to divorce you this year anyway - We are better off as friends - I am more confident and mature now. We should be divorced by this March...
Because my partner's 18 month affair was an emotional affair (she lives in another state, and is our teenage son's best friends Mom...a former friend of mine, too), I frequently have friends and even he will say, "well, at least he didn't have sex with her." There days I wonder if that would be better. Knowing that he emotionally left me, and wanted to be with her has been devastating. He has "justifcations" for this, of course. Thank you for these videos! They have helped me process the state of my marriage in many ways.
My long term relationship of 14 years said to me he didnt cheat, because I left him 2 years prior. I did leave him, because I wasnt happy. After I left, he stop smoking marijuana, drinking and began to look for work after not working for 5 yrs. showed me he wanted our family together, so we got back together. But he thinks using that was relevant to his cheating while I was pregnant. Yet alone hes on drugs again. Breaks my heart I'm a single mom of a 6 yr old and 2 month old. Oh yea, he said "were just friends" and "I wasnt looking it just happened " excuses
"I wasn't looking for it. We were just swept off our feet! We looked into each other's eyes and just got each other. And we both like music." My 63 year old husband married 38 years having an affair with a 30 year old he just met...
1)"Our marriage was as bad as it could get I thought it was over". 2) I have never had "sex" with another person.I caught him having "cyber sex" on a dating site.
My wife said that by revealing she was having an affair to our kids, I was unforgivable. She said that it would’ve been easier to forgive if I had a physical affair(which she did). She said I involved them in adult matters. They already knew & she involved us all by committing adultery & deciding to rip our family apart.
My husband also wanted a lifetime commitment from the prostitute that he put in my house and in my bed. He told her he had been looking for her all his life and that he would love her forever. To me he said he never had sex with her. It was only s&m and it relaxed her; she did it for sport. He neglected to say how many thousands of dollars a month he paid her...
I didn’t think you were on my team. I thought our marriage might be over. I thought you hated me. I thought I was her friend. I thought I was helping her. I thought it would be ok if I kept it hidden. It was just porn and not real sex
My husband initially tried to white wash his two year emotional and physical Affair by calling it an ‘Incident’, a ‘relationship’. He filed for Divorce this last summer after promising her they would have a future. Thankfully, he has been back for 4 months and we are successfully working on our marriage. He now uses the terms Affair and cheated.
I am still hurting so much, after I found out that my ex fiance cheated on me. D day was on October last year. She was having multiple affairs with multiple guys over a period of months. She broke up with me since then, because I reacted angrily and aggressively. I chased her away because I said many horrible things to her. She wants nothing to do with me anymore. After 11 years together. Engaged no more. When the clouds of resentment, hate, anger clear, I see that all I want is to be with her, hold her, love her again. But it will never happen again.
Hard to see from your space at the moment... Did you want to spend the rest of your life with someone who can’t keep their engagement vow.? You have a large investment of time in your relationship that is tough for sure. I see the word aggression, I don’t quite know what that means. When you can see the light again or even before...😊, give yourself a gift of some therapy and become the best version of your self for your next relationship. Invest in yourself.
Warren Beetar - she has many issues that need to be addressed BEFORE she commit to a serious relationship. First, she need to admit she has a problem. I think you should not remain stuck waiting for her. Just my opinion. God bless you
"I thought you didnt love me anymore" is what my spouse said.
I would love for you to address the "I made a mistake" comment the cheating spouse often gives. At times it infuriates me. Mistake? It was a deliberate choice!
No matter how much you understand, you'll never avoid the pain.
“I didn’t think you loved me anymore”
My now ex-wife said so many things that you put in this video. "I told you I wasn't happy." "I found someone who treated me well, someone who gave me attention." She even convinced her family to justify her actions by telling the story as "he tried controlling her so that's why they got divorced." Leaving out that SMALL detail of her affair with a married man who's almost a decade older with 3 kids and a wife of his own.
It's sad the tangled web she's weaved and now even brought her family into the lies. One day the entire truth will come out and I will people will see the true colors of what's been going on.
To everyone going through this mess, DO NOT try and fight them with truth because all of it will fall upon deaf ears! They might say some horrible things about you that aren't true to try and justify their actions but you need to stay strong and let them say what they want!
My husband justifies it by saying it was just sex since it was with prostitutes, multiple prostitutes. He believes it's less offensive because it wasn't with a single person he had developed an attachment to. I remind him that the effects of the infidelity are equalling traumatizing no matter which route of betrayl was taken.
In our home country, prostitution is - unfortunately - recognized and legalized as "sexual service".
It was therefore very easy for my husband to view and label his visits to prostitutes (the more exclusive ones from the higher price segment) simply as a "business transaction", as using a "service".
From his point of view, none of this had anything to do with our relationship or with me or with cheating. He didn't want to be romantically involved with another woman, didn't want to be courting another woman at the risk of being rejected anyway, he didn't want to risk losing our relationship, he wanted to make sure he had sex with other women on certain occasions , and not with any but with those who optically turned him on.
In fact, I'm even a little bit grateful to him for deciding against going romantically with other women and instead "just wanting sex."
It's still deeply hurtful, of course, and we're working hard. But it could have been a lot worse. He always chose me and our relationship, was always there for me and by my side. I love him very much and now I feel his love for me very intensely again.
Just a couple of his responses ... “lots of people have affairs” “it was just sex” “I didn’t want to do it” (but did it for 2 years) “the things I told her were lies. I only said them to get a response from her” “she was just a friend” “all I wanted was just friendship from her” ......
"I thought it was okay to text her again, because you and I have been doing so well lately!" which is why he erased all of the texts? I'm about out
My husband said, “it’s just sex, nothing else.” But he promised his mistress to divorce me, that he wants to he with her, she’s the love of her life, blah blah blah.
30 years out. It still hurts that husband was unfaithful. I'm told to just get over it. Hard to do. Counseling individually and couples helped some.
My unfaithful husband keeps saying "I didn't go looking for these affairs, ALL of them approached me"
Peonies and Fros it sounds like he’s still in the fog. Can I ask how far from d-day you are?
Mine says “ I made you the way you were” meaning I was angry all the time because of the way he treated me. That’s how he justified what he did. Nice.
"It was the touch, the attention"
I gave plenty of attention but it wasn't the right kind.
"I thought you had lost interest in me". " it just happened" "she came on to me". " we were friends with similar music interests ". "I should never have given her a hug".
"Just friends." "Just talking" "Just and app everyone uses " in reguards to emotional affairs, and inappropriate interactions on social medi.
Now divorced for 6 months but previously married for 36 years. He was having affairs starting back 32 years. Claims ‘we got married too young’, ‘we had good times, bad times, and this is where we ended up’, or ‘I never felt like a grown up.’ All a bunch of nonsense.
After a 9 month affair my husband says he was being childish and immature. It’s is an extremely sad example of how he isn’t ready to take full responsibility for how harmful his actions have been.
"I love him. Why can't you see that people can love more than one thing?", "It was FUN. FUN EVERYTIME. IT WAS JUST SOME FUN!!" -J, 2022
My wife and I had a good marriage for many years. Unfortunately, the villification actually started many years ago with hidden resentment, so add limerence and the moral justifications are very strong indeed.
Equally unfortunately, as a betrayed husband who has a good relationship with God and an unblurred memory, I have a decent sense of self worth. I tend to overcorrect the euphemisms in the moment so much as to be unfair.
I'm in the exact same boat with my husband. I thought we had a great marriage and had no idea he was building resentment towards me over the last couple years, then add the limerince withbhis affair partner and his justifications and I seriously don't know who he is anymore or how he got to this point...
Me too. Your comments mirror my situation exactly. At least it’s comforting to know others have and are surviving this pain
The one that drives me crazy is "sex is just an act"
Now that's BS!
After 38 years of marriage, my ex-husband said he was surprised that I was “ taking it so hard “ that he wanted a divorce so he could marry his AP. He just didn’t think it should bother me that much!
This was the response I got twice. Hurt like hell
Clear message, clear structure, easy to understand, thank you
My husband doesn’t call it sex addiction, he uses the term unwanted behavior, because he didn’t ask for the childhood trauma that led him into unwanted behaviors.
"I did it because it was expected of me", "it was only one kiss and one hug", "I did because I felt bad about myself", "I didn't tell you about it for 15 years because I knew it would hurt you", " I was going to tell you". "I always have deleted my texts"
In the beginnings of dealing with this affair. My wife has been giving me all the gaslight reasons: I didn't mean for it to happen, I love but I'm not in love with you, and more to this topic the pain I caused her the last few years of our marriage. Completely negating the fact I was so angry because I would catch her in other lies before this and she kept promising not to do it again.
My husband justified his emotional affair with our former nanny in a number of ways; he made me out to be a non supportive wife all of a sudden (prior to the affair he often commented on what a wonderful partner I was), he claimed he had to sneak around with his affair partner because I gave him no other choice, said I forbid him to see her (I did that after all but one of their secret rendezvous). It's been just over a year since it ended. Although he admits it was wrong to lie to me, he still claims he was never attracted to her.
Moral justification: I didnt set out to hurt you
My husband continues to contact his AP even though we are 6 months from dday and he has been pretending to try to work on our marriage. When I ask him about it, he'll say, "it was nothing" "I'm just trying to be friendly" etc. When I say there is absolutely no reason other than trying to continue the relationship he says, "it was a mistake" Too much double talk and BS. I've tried really hard but I don't think I should have to be his choice because she won't get involved again. Im width more than that. It crushes my soul knowing that my 23 year serial cheating husband chooses me last every time. Im completely broken right now.
LJRZ Bunny I know that feeling and I’m so sorry you’re going through this.
LJRZ Bunny I am sorry that your heart is broken. Remember that God heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3). He is also near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). May you feel His love and peace in the days ahead.
Been there far too long...
all infidelity is horrific, but the one that is active after it is discovered, no matter how they minimize or justify, is indescribable. You don't deserve it. I am praying for you to get the best help for your own healing. He may or may not get on board and that hurts too. I am so sorry. You are in my heart.
My husband refuses to admit he's having an affair. They are "just friends." Even though he takes her out every Thursday. They park at a park then "car pool" together to the bar or restaurant or whatever they're doing. They buy each gifts. He sends her flowers because her own husband doesn't & my husband feels bad for her. She says she has to remain his friend because he's going through marrital problems. Well we weren't having major problems till she came along. She told my husband that if I loved him I would let him do whatever he wanted. WHAT?!?!?! I am now known as the Warden among his new friends that they hang with. I am not aloud to interfere with his "alone time" which is his time with her or I'm being controlling.
“We had been friends for a long time” “ we would argue all the time and she would tell what I wanted to here “
“We were just talking at first”
I didn’t know that you meant to stop talking to her for good”
“I just wanted to see how she was doing”
He justifies everything with us going through a hard time when he wouldn’t make time for me because he was tired from work and didn’t have time for us, but all along he had time for the other women... multiple women.....
My husband likes to use the term "stepped out" rather than cheating or betrayal. He also constantly calls it a "mistake" falling "in love" with another woman and going back and forth for months isn't a mistake. I am starting to think he will never take true accountability for his actions, he thinks admitting what he did to me is accountability and he should just be able to tell me what he is doing or where he is going and I should just believe him, he shouldn't have to show me anything cuz that's controlling... well you're right you don't have to show me anything but don't expect me to trust you either
My favorite, YOU WERE ALWAYS BUSY WITH THE KIDS & DIDN'T HAVE TIME FOR ME. While he lost sight of the fact his minimal education allowed him jobs providing only minimal hourly rates, keeping us at poverty level income. I had to work full time while raising both kids. He did nothing to further his education.
None of his statement is true. We had a very ACTIVE sex life, until he damaged our wedding vows by cheating with a hooker at as bachelor party AFTER married 3 yrs.
He's been lying about this & drip feeding me partial truths since Feb 2022 D-day.
We hired a LMFT for counseling. She knew we were seeing her bcuz of his LUST addiction, & she had the AUDACITY (more like indecency) to wear a lower cut blouse revealing more cleavage with each successive appointment. He could not focus on any topics while focusing on her. Big mistake. We're DONE.
36 yr marriage is ending.
She is just a friend. She is known as the frat brother. She is our sorority sister so to him it is the frat brother to defuse the situation. He is with the frat brother now. She is continued to be know as the frat brother to others that do not know what I know. We divorced in March 2019.
I heard, "well you went to a guy's house to do his job resume for him." I told my husband I was going to a guy's house to do his resume in order to get a job with my husband. And they ended up working and carpooling together. I don't know why that gets thrown in my face in order to justify an emotional affair he had with someone but internet.
First it was because I filed for divorce, then needing attention he wasn't getting and now it's because he feels I cheated on him years ago. Which I did not. I wouldn't have had time if I wanted to but I'm now being taught that if I bring it to, he'll shoot me down with anything to keep my quiet about it. There is some excuse everytime I bring it up when he asks what's wrong with me if I'm having a hard say or these unrelenting triggers.
My husband said that didn’t give him enough tenderness during the recent confinement:)) I think it’s the worst excuse ever one can give
Mostly Peaceful
I caught my wife of 24 years (3 kids) kissing another man in Aug 2019. She told me she was already divorced from me, even though neither of us had obtained lawyers and were still living together (I thought we were on the road to reconciliation). She later admitted to (2) more men, all physical, in earlier 2019. Final straw, shared that she was intimate with another man (2) years into our marriage, 1997. EXCUSES: We married so young - What did you expect, I was lonely - It was just sex - It was only three times (with each man) - We are already divorced - I planned on divorcing you for at least four years - I was going to divorce you this year anyway - We are better off as friends - I am more confident and mature now. We should be divorced by this March...
Because my partner's 18 month affair was an emotional affair (she lives in another state, and is our teenage son's best friends Mom...a former friend of mine, too), I frequently have friends and even he will say, "well, at least he didn't have sex with her." There days I wonder if that would be better. Knowing that he emotionally left me, and wanted to be with her has been devastating. He has "justifcations" for this, of course.
Thank you for these videos! They have helped me process the state of my marriage in many ways.
My long term relationship of 14 years said to me he didnt cheat, because I left him 2 years prior. I did leave him, because I wasnt happy. After I left, he stop smoking marijuana, drinking and began to look for work after not working for 5 yrs. showed me he wanted our family together, so we got back together. But he thinks using that was relevant to his cheating while I was pregnant. Yet alone hes on drugs again. Breaks my heart I'm a single mom of a 6 yr old and 2 month old. Oh yea, he said "were just friends" and "I wasnt looking it just happened " excuses
"I wasn't looking for it. We were just swept off our feet! We looked into each other's eyes and just got each other. And we both like music." My 63 year old husband married 38 years having an affair with a 30 year old he just met...
" he treated me like me, not as a mom and not like a wife"
1)"Our marriage was as bad as it could get I thought it was over".
2) I have never had "sex" with another person.I caught him having "cyber sex" on a dating site.
My wife said I work to much (mandatory overtime) and I don't give enough attention to her!
Oh and she went to high school together (just friends)
My wife said that by revealing she was having an affair to our kids, I was unforgivable. She said that it would’ve been easier to forgive if I had a physical affair(which she did). She said I involved them in adult matters. They already knew & she involved us all by committing adultery & deciding to rip our family apart.
It was my fault he cheated because I didn't make my adult son with severe Crohn's who lives with us "do things around the house".
She blamed it on her bipolar.
My husband also wanted a lifetime commitment from the prostitute that he put in my house and in my bed. He told her he had been looking for her all his life and that he would love her forever. To me he said he never had sex with her. It was only s&m and it relaxed her; she did it for sport. He neglected to say how many thousands of dollars a month he paid her...
He said it was bipolar mania’s fault
She's just a friend. I'We didn't have sex. I'm not divorcing my wife to marry you.
I didn’t think you were on my team.
I thought our marriage might be over.
I thought you hated me.
I thought I was her friend.
I thought I was helping her.
I thought it would be ok if I kept it hidden.
It was just porn and not real sex
My husband initially tried to white wash his two year emotional and physical Affair by calling it an ‘Incident’, a ‘relationship’. He filed for Divorce this last summer after promising her they would have a future. Thankfully, he has been back for 4 months and we are successfully working on our marriage. He now uses the terms Affair and cheated.
I am still hurting so much, after I found out that my ex fiance cheated on me. D day was on October last year. She was having multiple affairs with multiple guys over a period of months. She broke up with me since then, because I reacted angrily and aggressively. I chased her away because I said many horrible things to her. She wants nothing to do with me anymore. After 11 years together. Engaged no more. When the clouds of resentment, hate, anger clear, I see that all I want is to be with her, hold her, love her again. But it will never happen again.
Hard to see from your space at the moment... Did you want to spend the rest of your life with someone who can’t keep their engagement vow.? You have a large investment of time in your relationship that is tough for sure. I see the word aggression, I don’t quite know what that means. When you can see the light again or even before...😊, give yourself a gift of some therapy and become the best version of your self for your next relationship. Invest in yourself.
Warren Beetar - she has many issues that need to be addressed BEFORE she commit to a serious relationship. First, she need to admit she has a problem. I think you should not remain stuck waiting for her. Just my opinion. God bless you