When I was in rehab I always talked to this old guy who was in there with me and he was so fun to talk to. He had been a heroin addict for over 40 years and it was his first time ever trying to get clean. Anyways all the guys were out smoking one day and Neil (that was his name) told us about this cartoon that was black and white that talked about doing heroin on Christmas and he always liked to watch it on Christmas when he was alone. We all laughed and thought he was crazy because of the way he explained it. He explained the entire plot to us and it just sounded so insane. That was 3 years ago and I finally found what he was talking about. I didn’t believe it was real... no one did... I hope Neil is doing alright.
Although keep on doing heroine when you get older is almost impossible ......it's possible though to self medicate with methadone or similar opioids, to keep surviving this madhouse called earth . If I had gone through rehab I probably wouldn't have been able to reach 70 . Although in some nations (like in the Netherlands) it's thankfully possible to get those medications through pharmacists , instead of having to go to some run down building to get your daily dose .
@@PAULLONDEN you've never tried to live without opiates? It's tough, but i do get enjoyment from other things (After the initial few months of withdrawal is over)...God I miss it though
Tommy-- I know this post is a year old but this is another Christma...That guy who scored for you reminds me of the character NICK iin JUNKY;...I quote from the novel---"Nick hoped that the people he scored for would give him at least the head off a cap. Most of the time all he got was a casual thanks, the person convincing himself that Nick had got his on the other end." I reckon we've all gone over the line...anything to avoid being dope sick. Have a Happy Christmas.
+Theevil6ify : Burroughs was clean back in the late 70's. He said he no longer had a need for heroin, and it didn't bother him at all. He told this to a group of people who attended a writer's workshop in Toronto.
+Ottee2 He also did methadone maintenance for decades afterwards and still had his personal assistant score him dope sometimes. He was bullshitting or at least minimizing at that workshop.
He may have occasionally indulged in extraordinary Smack, Dilaudid, morphine & other HP Opiates. He had a fondness for Eukodol, a wonderful German oxycodone•hcl sol for inj. & I think he deserved the occasional indulgence.
Yes he still indulged from time to time. As you get older it gets easier to not indulge all the time. Methadone helps to bring use down. I myself indulge occasionally also.
One of the most gritty yet heart warming Christmas stories ever. Anyone who has ever been down this road knows what I mean. And even if you haven you haven't it still has incredible significance.
@NASkeywest Spot on indeed. In my dark room, jimmy legs driving me mad, I'm at the 3-6-9-12 positions with no possibility of relief. To top it off, I can hear the Fish tank motor from the living room that, when well, I can't even hardly hear IN the living room. Oh, and the tiny green light on my cable box (before we went Fire stick) is now lighting up the WHOLE ROOM. Of course, I'd been here many times, I knew my senses were peeled and my eyes were so dilated that they actually saw more of the spectrum, I suppose. I do know that the divider between our world and other worlds is often opened slightly or, as I have experienced, dropped altogether. So kids? JUST SAY NO, yeah? Especially since everything is cut with this Xylazine...Tranq. H is, well, that's gone practically. Blow is also now cut with this shit. Just...Don't.
That part jumped out at me too .... that HYPER-sense of smell, ... especially of that toxic putrid cold sweet oozing from every pore, the feel of of breeze hurts, the world lit by a million watt lightbulb with every molecule of air YELLING at me ....
@@HonestJunkie you mfer had to remind me... that metallic smell... metallic stink coming out of every cell of your skin. But when I recall it 3 years in separation, the worst part was definitely mental. Especially with 10 years of experience under my belt. I'd have taken the physical effects ez pz if not the mental terror and horror of it. I genuinely have anxiety just thinking about it while writing this comment.
Feeling hot and cold at the same time. Literally tossing and turning, every 20 seconds. But, my experience, one of the worst parts about being dope sick is having a song stuck in your head all night/day while trying to sleep. Since you're hyper aware. For some reason random songs I don't even like just play on top of all of the physical sickness.
Its 6-1 today, been on the nod all month and the first of the month too, been awake all month seeing ghosts and having a crisis after my partner left for a while, but i like died 5 times and now im fine
Spectrescup no, i wasnt then, but i thought i was going to die, then as well. I am still here, although i dont know why, this time. I am really tired though, after staying up 30 straight days until i bombed out hard on myself and imploded my life i was building, i need a good nap, but i cant even get my 72 hours uninterrupted sleep, because of other reasons not listed here. I do have to ask, why did you ask me that? Do you actually give a shit, gut feeling, what? I appreciate that you did, because its nice to know someone cared enough to check in.
Survive. The wisest thing I've seen anyone say about addiction in a long time. The greater the survival instinct in the addict the worse they will be because a strong survival instinct is good for more than just staying alive once they have acquired the hunger. But it's also good for so much more. If the addict is still alive there is still hope for them.
Every Christmas day I share this beautiful tale written & narrated by the great William S. Burroughs. Take a moment & watch this short stop-motion film... Every Christmas there are hundreds of people living this story right now... beautifully sad & touching.
@@KatherineClairmont Exactly. When I got on methadone and started living a more stable life (i.e. An actual job) I noticed and found out about more functioning alcoholics and junkies than I originally thought existed. I’ve had so many co-workers ask me for advice about “friends” or “family” even though I knew the truth before they even asked.
My father was an addict. The book Junky helped me finally stop hating him. I realized that I wasn't mad at my father, but the drug that took him over. I was able to finally get past the hurt he caused me and start to forgive the man controlled by the drug. I love Burroughs.
+Daniel Maguire Whatever gets you through it. I just hate it when people blame the "dope" or "Alcohol" or "demons" that made them do ______. People need to take responsibility for their actions and pain they cause family and loved ones due to addiction. Glad your Dad is doing well. Take Care
@yeahSOwhat BRAVO!! Best comment on this thread!! It's like, there would be no cartel violence if the "War on Drugs" (read: war on freedom) had not been declared.
@@thepupils209 Would you blaim a cancer patient for the pain he caused his family? Would you blame the bi-polar person for not making the right decisions for their family? No, you wouldn't. And you can't put all the blame in the person who is addicted. Addiction is a physical and mental illness. These people physically cant' stop. They don't need hate, they need treatment and support.
I visited his grave not too long ago; it's located in a big beautiful old cemetery in St. Louis. Among the many items people left at his simple headstone were beer cans (some full, some empty), a burned CD in a jewel case, three or four little airplane-sized liquor bottles (vodka and Jack Daniels iirc), a sealed envelope with "for Bill" written on it, and a full pack of Marlboro reds enclosed in a Ziploc bag.
I'm here for a decade of Christmases... Been on both sides. This is a ritual for me, and it had been for my partner, who was killed in 2020 R.I.P- Chris ♥️ This always humbles me Hope this finds you all well this yr!!
I shudder when I remember how awful withdrawal was. I'm fifty in May and I came off methadone in 2014 after 21 years. I immediately and predictably feel back on alcohol but have stopped drinking in the last couple of weeks before it kills me. I'm just smoking weed now.
@@Lee.Carlson I'm 46 , I've been on methadone, and suboxone and now the Seblicate. I have been "opiate" free 7.5 yrs. Had the same thing, I went back to drinking, and then became homeless. I now live far from "home", but I take my anxiety meds and weed. I'm hoping you find some peace. In 2020, I lost my Dad, partner, cousin and 2 childhood friends in 18 days, I thought I'd relapse- but I made a promise to my Dad, not to move backwards... Best of luck in this New Year.... the 🌎 has gone crazy- buckle up, batten down the hatches!!♥️
@@savage9514 Hehehe. Nice sentiments and sorry for your losses. My only sibling which was my sister a year older than me died in 2016 and I've lost innumerable friends to it. As hard as it is, it's in our own hands to stay clean and alive. I managed to circumvent going to prison but I was hopelessly hooked from eighteen to thirty-seven. I was first offered heroin not long before my seventeenth birthday but didn't take the plunge until I was seventeen and a half...being addicted on a blood chemical level didn't arrive until just over a year later after first trying some. The idea of experimenting with it crept surreptitiously into my nascent teenage psyche over the course of the six months between first being offered it and smoking a few lines. Once you have tasted the sweet nectar of the poppy, you certainly become ensorcelled by its charms. But it leaves an indelible mark on your soul after seeing people at their worst many times. What a world we live in! But I intend to continue beating a path through the jungle that is life. As I fervently hope you do my friend.
@@Lee.Carlson I could not have put that any better. I did some time- for me, at 13, it started with drinking, acid, by 16, cocaine- and just that drug step ladder most of us climb. I still battle inside with cocaine, as it has been always in my life from 19, till the end of 2021. As my claim is "opiate free", and since I moved, cocaine free. It wasn't till 2029, Covid, all the loss, and the fact Trudeau stuck $4000 in my bank account the day of the mass shooting- we all have to own our own 💩- but I went a little off- no spikes, just smoking but, that was my relapse. Had 3 ozs of weed, a new phone and a carton of smokes, $8000 in the hole, and lessons learned. I don't beat myself up about it. I dealt with so much grief and loss, I could have done worse, or not return from it. I'm a lucky one. We just had 15 deaths in 9 days, new drug being put in everything. I'm sorry for your losses as well. I just keep saying, I must be here for a reason.... so must you. Best of luck in this New Year..... keep on smoking that green lol. Keeps me at bay lol
Amazing story but Jesus if you've ever been there no matter how long ago.. it stirs something up big time. Nonetheless Burroughs kills it as usual, no teacher like experience
@@vollsticks Wasn't it : "It's not a habit, it's a way of life" - or am I forgetting my lines? Oh no ! But I am rather in the mood to watch NL than read. Have to wait for a call - no, not THAT CALL , not anymore, just some agency.
i had a crew of dealers i called faithfully for 7 years. every year at xmas no matter what i'd get a call at 11am to come outside and get my free hit. always reminds me of this.
2nd Xmas watching this. 1rst sober. Cant say I miss being 'on the nod' and so grateful im not sick on this Xmas Eve. Anyone out there struggling please dont give up. Its never too late. You can get out of this life. The real Immaculate 'nod' comes from the freedom of not being a slave to a substance thats running your life. Merry Christmas everyone and stay safe
As a person in recovery, this really hit home. So grateful to have stumbled on this. I've lost so many friends in the past few years to this, I've almost lost count. My heart aches for those who have to spend Christmas this way. How beautifully and artfully presented. So raw, dark, frank, and gritty. The end scene just completely melted me.😢🥲
I've been in recovery for almost eleven years now. This vignette brought it all back- the sweaty twisted nightmare of looking and looking and scoring and looking and scoring and looking and aching and aching and aching and looking and aching....I do not miss the way I used to exist. I saw Burroughs there at the end with his friends and family having Christmas dinner away from all the terrible shit and it made me so grateful that I've been able to have a nice stretch of Christmases with my folks. Those of us in recovery need to be reminded from time to time how terrible it was and how terrible it can be if we're not doing what we're supposed to be doing. My heart goes out to everyone spending this time of year dopesick- I hope and pray they get help. 🙏☮❤🕉
That's the saddest I've ever heard. The junkie, regardless of how he's treated by society, still has good in his heart. All junkies have done shady stuff for junk. Most junkies hate doing what they must to function another day. The hustle wears a life thin. In the grip of a heavy junk addiction, given the options of death or another day of roaming alone and sick, only to be let down multiple times in few hours, death is the often the sought after of the two. The good deed done by the junkie got him right with the maker. No more heart ache brought on by ripping people off, no more lying and being deceitful. God granted him the ultimate nod.
@@robzilla730 you can’t trust the average tweaker far as you can throw ‘em. funnily enough though, the most honest and trustworthy dude i ever met in all my years of being a street urchin was a huuuge tweaker. i don’t think he’d ever burned anyone in his whole life. & it wasn’t like he was naïve or a pushover either. dude had street smarts. he just didn’t have the constitution for dishonesty. it really just depends on the person i guess. some would trade their own mother for a bag of dope, while some would rather be sick every single time rather than risk compromising their ideals. people like him are rare, but they exist
The Junk Equation: “Junk is not, like alcohol or weed, a means of increased enjoyment of life. Junk is not for kicks, it is a way of life.” - William Burroughs
Been clean several years now, addiction is strange. Even after all the sickness and misery and emptiness that comes with using, your brain finds a way to romanticize it and on occasion you find yourself looking back almost fondly on the time you spent as an addict.
First time I ever saw this, Back in 1997 I was at this guys apartment that was a shooting gallery shit hole just off of Sunset on Sanborn Ave. In LA.. "Good ol Jake the snake" NEways.. we just got off, I did my usual 3 balloon hit, 15 bucks each.... MAN ... I was sitting there.. juuust feeeeeling my dope lol and fucken Jake gets up & turns on the TV & VCR & pops in a cassette. Jake had told me about William S. Burroughs ... and what I watched next was this movie. You know what brought me here? the death of Prince...
Lol, The Queen's Message (Burroughs wasn't what would be called a "queen" these days, or a "swish" in his time... He knew that gay men weren't all camp, limp-wristed "fops"... He was THE MANLY GAY (which, don't get me wrong, is pretty problematic today... But he was trying to wake people up to the fact that there's no such thing as "gay behaviour".. 'You may be a f*g but you make love like a pimp"-Joan Vollmer to WSB in the late 1940's, I guess) . "This man was disturbing the peace while getting a piece"--that one sheriff who busted WSB and Joan for having sex on the side of the road in their car. Yeah, WSB didn't conform to ANY fucking box you tried to fit him in!
How many of you would really sacrifice their last piece of happiness on a lonely Christmas night? I for one would sacrifice my pleasure it would remind me too much of my son or daughter in pain... he basically turned into DAD mode and that overpowers anything even drug abuse! Fuck drugs when it comes to saving someone who is truly in pain.
I love the "goddamn alcoholic" line 10:17. These alcoholics really have it so easy, don't they? I mean - their medicine is cheap, legal, and available 24 hours a day. They suffer, too - but, c'mon man . . .
Fatty McFatso LOL---many junkies, including this one, begrudge alcoholics their no risk score of their drug of choice...fucking louts! Drunken shit bags. I know I'm being naughty...and that's just fine!! While we have to risk life and liberty to get our propers.
~Soon Come....It'll be available within the not too distant future. Just like any common Mareewanna-(HEAVY Mexicano Accent;)- dispensary.... ~$till have yet to remove the remaining goons in the high-dollah empty suits busily profiting from the human misery machine, elephant-spec social damage, violence, health issues, tax-dollah incinerating "War-On-Drugs/PEOPLE" prohibition of ANYTHING all too often accompanies.... ~Those suits being the exact same people greedily working the Black-Market-Back-Door that are heavily invested inducing the "Opiate Crisis" through legal pharma co's, corporate boards & consortiums, bought off doctors & let us not forget the revolving door of "Addiction Treatment Centers" 'jus salivating @ the pro$pect of a never-ending >F>L>O>W> of return cu$tomer$...... ~Shades of the Phillip K Dick novel & great rotoscope'd flick: "A Scanner Darkly" -ENJOY that Buzz & do some TIME TRAVELING/"Ride-Along" WITH US, as a day without a buzz, is a day that never was!....;) Be Well.....
Funny, Im listening to WSB 5/18/81 reading @ present moment. Naked lunch is one of my faves as well. One of my best friends uncles, -Mr. Nelson Lyons produced WSB's "Dead City Radio" album. Nelson had some great stories indeed.... Agreed. Opiates arent in the least bit neuro-toxic-(Aside from a few full synthetics-demerol/ect)- they can be taken over looong periods of time w/o any ill effects-(Lifetime user due to chronic pain conditions myself)- -Seems to slow aging process a bit... -Havent had a common cold in 10+ YEARS now!--And Im not a rabid hand washer @ all-(occurrence of occasional WD symptoms no doubt trick the body into thinking a flu/cold like virus has been introduced to the body?)- Its chiefly the prohibition angle that leads to all the "bad" things around such usage... Morphine/Papaver Somniferum poppies have been with mankind for eons now, so it has a proven, loooooong-term beneficial track record as far as a medicine goes.. Its not "bad" in & of itself, however such neutrally oriented drugs can be WEAPONIZED against a target populations as a means of distraction &/or CONTROL right? A common hammer can build gorgeous structures for people to occupy/live in, but that same hammer, used in anger/passion can also dash out the brains of an individual, so I suppose its what lies within the heart & intent of the user that matters yes? Its usage has saved FAR more people historically than any drug OD has taken-(95% of such OD's are POLY-drug overdoses, but the MSM seldom shares that fact)- Enjoy the book! ~Take care!
15 year heroin addixt. The way he writes about sickness is so dead on, the way he writes about the stealing n all the pantomime of pretend to forget something. It makes me feel not alone.
@@jeffryhammel3035 Hey Jeffry. I started popping pills in '98 but didn't get a real habit until October, 2002 when I started on Oxycontin and h...you don't forget that first time you wake up sick and you got nothing...have to start up my money maker, my cab, and three hours later I got enough for a bundle...then I got had a Florida pill mill guy for the Oxycontin a couple days later. We DO care here on this page, brother. Yeah, you get the occasional asshole who is feeding off people's hardships or trying to live vicariously something he/she doesn't have the guts to try themselves. It takes a lot to survive two decades plus, my friend.. We've all sacrificed varying chunks of ourselves to powder and pill, We care. I care.
One bad holiday,when I was still on dope I said to my junk buddy " I feel like fucking Danny"...I explained it like a lot of stories here and they didn't understand,at all.It's one of those things you truly have to see first hand.Every opiate addict I know always admits to crying at the end,myself included.Not out of shame,but that sense of joy and relief.
From what I've learned, Nick Donkin directed this film which he also did the music video of Alice In Chains "I stay away". You can definitely see the resemblance in the two as well.
I remember being dope sick and having no money to score only to have a junkie friend see me and hook me up with a fix only because I've helped them out when they were sick. This story always makes me think about those times.
Been clean for 22 years but I had PIC too . 3 of us sometimes on are own but one would help the other if we could. Cop together put money together to get a gram to get a better deal. Not proud but just how it was. Amazingly we all got clean and are still alive although we are still friends we don't hang as much anymore Dunkin donuts once in a while.
I can't stand to see anyone dope sick. I'm an Old J and we look out for one another that way... unless you're a narc, or asshole. That kinda Skaggard can lump it. That's KARMA, Jack.
@@fattymcfatso1083 Freewheeling Freddy sez, "Dope will get you through times of No Money better than Money will get you through times of No Dope". ~Old Doper Poster 1970's
Liked, (loved is more like it). I forgot just how good this story and its claymation adaption truly is. For those of you concerned about the plight of poor junkies like Danny the car wiper, it doesn't require a Christmas miracle, just sensible drug policy. Anyway, RIP Bill, you're sorely missed.
Came across this while watching something else. I really enjoyed it. Excellent story telling, loved the voice. Gonna be something I'm gonna want to watch every Christmas along with it's a wonderful Life & my prince song another lonely Christmas. Thank you for who ever posted it
I’ve been clean off heroin for three years now, but I used to always play this when I was dope sick, like REALLY SIC. I know it so well, lived this life for years. I only revisit in now because I’m once again in a position I thought I’d never be.. junk sick. Only this time from the doctors. Had heart surgery to replace my aortic valve damaged by heron use. Had to be on fentanyl for days, took me off last nite. It’s never fun coming off dope no matter what kind it is, all basically the same. Good luck to anyone dealing with addiction. It’s a bitch
"I've faked it so many times......." its just a trip to know this behavior stretches back to the great depression........wow.....I know this behavior because I must admit doing it myself
Bella Legosi If you want a great personal account of opiate addiction before the Great Depression (just a FYI--Burroughs started using a year or two after WWII ) check out You Can't Win by Jack Black (no, not that Jack Black!), the autobiographical book influenced Burroughs and shaped his writing. Indeed a common edition has a short foreword/introduction by WSB. Jack Black was a HUGELY interesting dude, look him up and try to read the book because I promise you won't be disappointed! If you liked Junkie you'll almost certainly get a kick out of You Can't Win!
As a heroin addict in recovery, I watch this every Christmas to remind me...This, and the 'novel' JUNKY, will help you realise...it's more than you can shoulder. The burden. In NA, they tell you to surrender to the higher power. It works. That's because God listens, and if you want out, he will carry you through hell...but you HAVE to wanna quit...God bless y'all - happy Christmas 2023 ❤🎄❤
Only a heroin addict active or no can truly understand what the car wiper was giving up his already pitiful amount to fix him when he administrator's over to the fella in pain. No self respected addict would give this background noise no thought and proceed to plunge it home so Danny gave up his home in essence. Great story greater writer a personal favourite
@@michaelg1060 yeah, i get it. I used drugs for one thing: to stay numb. I didnt want to feel anything. So when i did get sober i was TERRIFIED. But honestly, you either get sober or you dont, theres no in between. I hope you get there. God bless
As a former user myself, i can relate to the feelings etc in this piece. I found it a very moving, honest story. It shows that in a twisted way, even junkys are good folk, deep down.
Hell with all the dope! Opiods are poison. They turn grown men into pussies! I'll never go back to that shit, being a slave to some low life drug dealer. You can have that shit.
+HughieDixon I had them for the first time recently this year....I'd say the pain was second only to snapping my shin bone, then getting muscle spasms in the same leg, while in the hospital, before they could put the rod in. In other words... No sir, I did not enjoy them!
+HughieDixon I currently have one - my first one. Luckily my croakie Dr dident step on my pain script or be stingy--as he had a debilitating kidney stone about 40 years ago. Regardless, was just checking to make sure this classic was still up on Youtibe, as it's always a lonely Christmas for me.. and that times almost here..
This movie is a true xmas miracle! William Burroughs is my favorite author. My favorite part is seeing him sit down in his living room! I'm an old Speed freak who used from ages 14- 38. Been clean 25 years. It was possible to read W. Burroughs books as the words didn't jump off the pages when I was wired. There was alot of Dope around in NYC in the 70s. I chipped awhile, but it didn't float my boat. I can see the appeal, though! I was a stone methamphetamine freak, for sure. Alot of my friends were junkies. We all had drug habits. Regardless of what you use, a habit is a habit. It rules your whole life. You learn to function & are a slave to it, for sure. I don't miss the getting and using and finding the ways and means to get more. I'm content now, and old these days. I lived fast and didn't die young. But have been dead once, and almost dead other times. That life wasn't pretty, for sure. In the book, "Last Words" Burroughs is on his deathbed and still attacking The Man and the failed war on drugs. Pick up this book! He wrote it in longhand in notebooks. In bed. Cheers folks.
I lived in Brooklyn when 9'11 occurred. My wife, we were living in PA and she'd had enough of me driving hack so I could always have cash to get at least one bundle a day. Doc Hollidays (?) on Ave A was a great dive bar. The barmaid would take our dope orders collected the cash and left saying "I shall return bearing gifts!!" Heh, only in the GOLES. Right. A habit is a habit is a habit. I'm in a kind of recovery program...slow going. I dream of dope, wake up with the smell of dope and/or coke in my nostrils...I cry when I realize it's a dream. Opiates, no matter what kind, is a holy bitch to kick. But I would imagine meth is doubly hard. I wish you every happiness in this life. Peace.| PS-- Last Words a MUST for any Burroughs lover. When he is reminiscing about the Eukodol , the drug, a synthetic Opiate manufactured by the Germans. Quote from Last Words: I guess I used all up in Tangier-- but's it's still out there in Quevedo, Equador, on a dusty back shelf covered with mildew on a South seas island.Maybe up in some Swede town under the Northern Lights. "Any more of that?" "Well, yes--a consignment of twenty boxes, 20 in each box. Let you have it all for, well say $100 US dollars." "Done." In Last Words, as you know, Uncle Bill wakes up mildly junk sick...he has two other Eukodol fantasies in the book. Or, the night he wrote; "Chinese food took a heavy toll on my guts. Can hardly wait for dawn and Methadone Maybe a little Codeine. A pinkies packet left, so I think. No...well who can blame and addict's fingers?" One last Important NOTE: In "Last Words", Burroughs made an appeal to HIS PEOPLE, US, his fans, to carry on the War AGAINST the "Idiotic War on Drugs." Roughly paraphrased; "If you are my readers, you co-creators go out and punch a hole in the BIG LIE...punch a hole in it FOR ME. (emphasis mine) I have tried hard to do just that. Well, Happy Thanksgiving.
Thanks for posting. In a deep, deep, depression Master Burroughs cheered me up a bit...a crack to let the light in...resolved: in 2022 give the world a break and leave no comments on Y. T. Tis irresistible sometimes though isn't it?- to make, maybe A CONNECTION. is there anybody there, where is there and does anybody give a -hit. This was very delightful and it rhymed? and had rhythm...take the edge off...hmm. mother's little helper never grew up...Sincerely Lucy Jordan, Traveling
anonymous anonymous I know this is late, but I give a shit and I hope you are Ok. I'm going through it, too. You're not alone. Hold on. Keep your chin up, head down. Love and Peace.
Bought this on DVD my freshman year at Rollins College (2004). Been watching it every year since then. Thanks a lot, Uncle Bill. My Christmas tradition.
Classic... If anyone reads anymore, fiction author Thomas C. Stuhr writes some relevant books. Commotion in Mingertown and Man mission and appetite. Give em a read.on A .m a zon.
Merry Christmas... Ive been there... Im still a junky but been stable on methadone. I know someone out there is probably sick on Christmas like I was too many times. I wish I could help you, but know that time slows down but never stands still; you'll survive and get well again. So to other fellow junkies... Merry Christmas
This story at least the start, is similar to The Priest They Called Him. My friend had a vinyl LP of Burroughs reading the story with Kurt Cobain playing noise guitar over it. It was kick ass.
the truth of the streets, I was homeless and came across characters such like these. its amazing how life on the streets doesn't move. junkies aren't bad people they are hounded by a system that doesn't care. all systems are fascists in there own quirky way
I also lived the horror of having to get up each day, On Empty and that dread knowledge that you had to get up the money SOMEHOW for a bundle and if you were real careful, get you through the day. Every fellow junkie I've ever known wasn't the person they "used to be"; One owned a comic book store...another was a lawyer who hated being a lawyer...it came in handy, though! Me, I used to drive cement mixers and dump trucks and made great money. And every one of us, to the man/woman, SWORE there were lines we'd NEVER CROSS...then watched ourselves step over each one, careful not to erase the line so that we might find our way back, if we cared to. I never thought I'd enter a home and strong-arm a friend for money, but I did. The lucky ones who make it back with what's left of our persons, like me, make amends, live as good a life as we can, try as hard as we can NOT to relapse...and be thankful we are still alive, for our families, our friends, and as a cautionary tale.
1060michaelg I'll never forget that feeling of dread every morning. Waking up in an instant panic in a room without heat in Philly in February. Fucking hell! I'm still not out of the woods, chipping a few times a week. But it's starting to get a hold of me again.
@@1060michaelg Control! I think in many ways Burroughs was an anarchist... He strove through his writing to discredit and overthrow all systems of control... If that's not anarchism I don't know what is! Apparently he shared a townhouse in NYC with the anarchist writer (and, unfortunately, pederasty advocate) Hakim Bey. Burroughs would insist on a cup of Earl Grey tea to wash down his raw Chinese opium!
When I first did heroin I said to myself, I wanna feel this way for the rest of my life,, too stupid and in the moment to look into the future, what happens is, first off, you need it everyday, secondly, your system will adapt to it and the sensations will change, needing more and more, eventually it only takes away the sickness of withdrawal, that's when the misery cycle starts, and when your curled up in a ball on the floor with your stomach cramping, your legs doing some crazy stretch thing, your skin is crawling, your freezing and sweating at the same time, it's insidious and you just want it to stop.
Addiction. Root word, "addicus", Latin. Definition, slave. The human brain is hard wired to become addicted to something. It forces us to spend energy and problem solve to get whatever that goody is. It can't really be ignored. If you're lucky, maybe you will be addicted to something minor like caffein or at worst, nicotine. But sometimes it's crack. Great video!
Have been there, have done that...all familiar ....too familiar....Good Ol faithful. The Bull. Bill. Making a sandwich, taking his time cutting the edges.....it's like I knew him all his life..... Oh Bill.
@@luke125 Nurse: Perhaps the appendix is on the left side doctor, I saw a scar..."Stop looking over my shoulder, I'm coming to that...don't you think I know where an appendix is? I studied appendectomy in 1904 at Harvard!
@@1060michaelg “You squirts couldn’t lance a pimple without electric vibrating scalpel and suture. All the skill’s going outta surgery! All the know how and make due!”
LOL!! "Did I ever tell you about the time I performed an emergency appendectomy with a rusty sardine can? And once, I was caught without instrument ONE, and removed a uterine tumor with my TEETH. Well, that was in the Upper Effendi and besides...the wench is dead."
@joangordoneielo First, as a Jew, I support Israel of course, too. I have family in Eilat and they are under the gun...I pray Hashem protect Eretz Yisrael and Am Yisrael (CHAI!). Yes, just now crawling out from under a 22 year run, used every day...with only times of lack and junk sickness the only days I didn't. That makes about 45 days in 22 years. I might as well've been in suspended animation. I missed everything...things I can't get back from not being present with my family. But to your point; I COULD NOT leave another addict sick, even though I was left ill more than a couple times. That's on THEM. Yeah, as Burroughs said, "Junkies are a pretty sane lot." Happy Thanksgiving.
Every time I hear burroughs recite his work I remember exactly why I have his face depicted permanently on my fore-arm. Brilliant writing, it's the only thing christmas related that I can enjoy on June 1st as much as I do on December 24th. By far my favourite. I give this a leviathan sized nod of approval. Great post, cheers.
@Deadbeat Jeff Feel EXACTLY the same way, man! What source did you use for the Uncle Bill tattoo? Yeah, I go to this several times throughout the year and on Christmas Eve, while other folks are reading "Twas The Night Before Christmas", I am reading "The Junky's Christmas" aloud to my wife, who suffered seeing me in the most horrendous (and twice life threatening) withdrawals for many years. Seldom, well, never can I get to through the last paragraph without tears falling and voice trembling. On "maintenance" now (yawn) ...still, better than the life that robbed me of so many years of being emotionally present with my wife and daughter. So true what William wrote---(paraphrasing) "An addict's factual memory might be quite accurate...but his emotional memory is non-existent." This was precisely the case for me. When I "came back", I had to be TOLD so many things...it was no different than being in prison, separated from loved ones for years. Take care---great comment.
This story has always made me teary-eyed. Watching it with claymation dehumanizes it a bit... but, then, I suppose most people would think that about seeing someone in the throes of junk sickness.
Y'all getting too deep on this, just smoke thc. If you wanna be sad I recommend watching this and I haven't even watched it yet. I'm not even high I quit weed
@@billepperson2662 Hey, B.E. Yes, I used from the early 70's to the very late 90's. We still had a family atmosphere thru it all, and remained human. The last 24 years have been great.
stevearle--- It sure is...Only, I wish the picture of the addict giving his last bit of comfort in the world to a sick poor boy in a flop house room would become the new paradigm for sacrifice. An addict can dream...
It was so hard to get heroin on Christmas. I’d have to cop a day b4 and make sure that I didn’t touch my Christmas Day fix. This cartoon always reminds me of that. Clean since 2009
Ty for sharing. I had to kick my son out exactly a year ago because of the choices he was making. I'm thinking of him now and praying that he is okay. I will never forget how proud and happy I was 27 years ago when I put his little new born body in Santa 's hands.
I’m sorry about your son. I’m not saying what you did was the wrong thing. He may have chose those first experimental doses, but I assure you no addict chooses to live the way they do. It’s the definition of addiction, the absence of choice. It’s not easy but they should be pitied and deserve help.
@@tonypellock5326 there is no such thing as addiction, only things you like doing more than life. The so called addict will experience the pain of going without and withdrawal many times but will always choose to give in to their base nature and use, over and over again. Until one day they choose not to. End of story. I should add that heroin withdrawal will not kill them , its the lack of willpower to go through it that only LOOKS like they have no control. The rehab industry thrives on such misinformation and those who don't know first hand buy it hook line and sinker.
Throwing someone out on the street like a dog, especially one who is dependent, always improves ones situation.... except people don't even do that to dogs.....
Tried both hammer and morph and absolutely spewed my guts up to the point of having sore ribs for days afterwards. Didn’t like the effect whatsoever and never had the urge to go looking for it afterwards. A tiny bit of morph in a one ml sharp felt ok but certainly didn’t want to have it the next day. I have trouble picturing myself getting hooked on it first go
This christmas was my first not listening to this, my dealer gave me a bag i didn't ask for, just as a christmas gift because im a loyal client, and i cried after because i needed it that day. It has been bad, it doesnt stop being bad, of course, but thats junk. Fentanyl is a harder game with even more moot rewards. At least you can stay well on methadone. Hoping the new year brings you new habits. Stash somethin for once. Today i found a foil i stashed a month ago and,forgot about entirely, which i couldnt manage to do the entire 8 years ive been strung out. Best wishes
![Pull My Daisy - 1959 (Sub Ita) [Jack Kerouac, Allen Ginsberg, Gregory Corso]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/_12rctV5Z84/mqdefault.jpg)
When I was in rehab I always talked to this old guy who was in there with me and he was so fun to talk to. He had been a heroin addict for over 40 years and it was his first time ever trying to get clean. Anyways all the guys were out smoking one day and Neil (that was his name) told us about this cartoon that was black and white that talked about doing heroin on Christmas and he always liked to watch it on Christmas when he was alone.
We all laughed and thought he was crazy because of the way he explained it.
He explained the entire plot to us and it just sounded so insane.
That was 3 years ago and I finally found what he was talking about.
I didn’t believe it was real... no one did...
I hope Neil is doing alright.
There are a lot of guys I still think about.
Although keep on doing heroine when you get older is almost impossible ......it's possible though to self medicate with methadone or similar opioids, to keep surviving this madhouse called earth .
If I had gone through rehab I probably wouldn't have been able to reach 70 . Although in some nations (like in the Netherlands) it's thankfully possible to get those medications through pharmacists , instead of having to go to some run down building to get your daily dose .
I think he is probably in the same place with Danny from the cartoon.
Never an addict donate his fix you know it better
@@PAULLONDEN you've never tried to live without opiates? It's tough, but i do get enjoyment from other things (After the initial few months of withdrawal is over)...God I miss it though
A very moving tale. Brings tears to this old (ex) junkie's eyes. Blessings on the poor and suffering addicts in the grip of active addiction.
Danny the car wiper was a far more generous junky than I. (was) I watch this every year and it makes me feel equal parts good and bad...
The Void yeah me too
Tommy Oneill Sounds like you met the real Danny the car wiper!
Tommy Oneill Meh, he prolly took his cut off the top. I know I would have...figured his connect was enough better than yours that you'd never notice.
Tommy-- I know this post is a year old but this is another Christma...That guy who scored for you reminds me of the character NICK iin JUNKY;...I quote from the novel---"Nick hoped that the people he scored for would give him at least the head off a cap. Most of the time all he got was a casual thanks, the person convincing himself that Nick had got his on the other end." I reckon we've all gone over the line...anything to avoid being dope sick. Have a Happy Christmas.
The Void a beautiful holiday tradition.
Happy 100th, Bill.
Hope you're on the nod in...whatever dimension you're in now.
+Theevil6ify :
Burroughs was clean back in the late 70's. He said he no longer had a need for heroin, and it didn't bother him at all. He told this to a group of people who attended a writer's workshop in Toronto.
+Ottee2 He also did methadone maintenance for decades afterwards and still had his personal assistant score him dope sometimes. He was bullshitting or at least minimizing at that workshop.
schwarzblatt :
It's entirely possible. I'm just reporting what he said. His assistant was with him, by the way, at the workshop.
He may have occasionally indulged in extraordinary Smack, Dilaudid, morphine & other HP Opiates. He had a fondness for Eukodol, a wonderful German oxycodone•hcl sol for inj. & I think he deserved the occasional indulgence.
Yes he still indulged from time to time. As you get older it gets easier to not indulge all the time. Methadone helps to bring use down. I myself indulge occasionally also.
One of the most gritty yet heart warming Christmas stories ever. Anyone who has ever been down this road knows what I mean. And even if you haven you haven't it still has incredible significance.
+WitchidWitchid You are absolutely spot on my friend. If you've been there....you know...
+tacman1974 Yep, been there myself more than once.
I know what an achievement it is. A great achievement. Well done my friend. I wish you all the best. Total and ever lasting.....non opiate use!!!
+WitchidWitchid the immaculate fix
That's it!! The immaculate fix...
The description of being dope sick and everything being “crisp and clear with a painful edge.” Is spot on.
@NASkeywest Spot on indeed. In my dark room, jimmy legs driving me mad, I'm at the 3-6-9-12 positions with no possibility of relief. To top it off, I can hear the Fish tank motor from the living room that, when well, I can't even hardly hear IN the living room. Oh, and the tiny green light on my cable box (before we went Fire stick) is now lighting up the WHOLE ROOM. Of course, I'd been here many times, I knew my senses were peeled and my eyes were so dilated that they actually saw more of the spectrum, I suppose. I do know that the divider between our world and other worlds is often opened slightly or, as I have experienced, dropped altogether.
So kids? JUST SAY NO, yeah? Especially since everything is cut with this Xylazine...Tranq. H is, well, that's gone practically. Blow is also now cut with this shit. Just...Don't.
That part jumped out at me too .... that HYPER-sense of smell, ... especially of that toxic putrid cold sweet oozing from every pore, the feel of of breeze hurts, the world lit by a million watt lightbulb with every molecule of air YELLING at me ....
It is a LIVING death.
@@HonestJunkie you mfer had to remind me... that metallic smell... metallic stink coming out of every cell of your skin.
But when I recall it 3 years in separation, the worst part was definitely mental. Especially with 10 years of experience under my belt. I'd have taken the physical effects ez pz if not the mental terror and horror of it. I genuinely have anxiety just thinking about it while writing this comment.
Feeling hot and cold at the same time. Literally tossing and turning, every 20 seconds. But, my experience, one of the worst parts about being dope sick is having a song stuck in your head all night/day while trying to sleep. Since you're hyper aware. For some reason random songs I don't even like just play on top of all of the physical sickness.
Hello fellas. It's Christmas Eve. Hope none of you are dope sick and broke. I'll see you all on the nod.
Its 6-1 today, been on the nod all month and the first of the month too, been awake all month seeing ghosts and having a crisis after my partner left for a while, but i like died 5 times and now im fine
@@stella-vu8vh you sure, Stella?
Spectrescup no, i wasnt then, but i thought i was going to die, then as well. I am still here, although i dont know why, this time. I am really tired though, after staying up 30 straight days until i bombed out hard on myself and imploded my life i was building, i need a good nap, but i cant even get my 72 hours uninterrupted sleep, because of other reasons not listed here. I do have to ask, why did you ask me that? Do you actually give a shit, gut feeling, what? I appreciate that you did, because its nice to know someone cared enough to check in.
Spectrescup simply put, no, im not sure, i am never sure, unless im certain, in which case i am sure, but im rarely certain and mostly sure.
@@stella-vu8vh How are you doing now?
We are never born bad, we are taught these behaviors or learn them to survive. No one is beyond goodness, especially addicts. I love this film short.
Thank you for the "nobody is beyond goodness" comment. It so describes my heroin junkie family.
Survive. The wisest thing I've seen anyone say about addiction in a long time. The greater the survival instinct in the addict the worse they will be because a strong survival instinct is good for more than just staying alive once they have acquired the hunger. But it's also good for so much more. If the addict is still alive there is still hope for them.
Addictions are short-term survival and long-term suicide.
Every Christmas day I share this beautiful tale written & narrated by the great William S. Burroughs.
Take a moment & watch this short stop-motion film...
Every Christmas there are hundreds of people living this story right now... beautifully sad & touching.
You are one lucky dude, I also met Kurt and Burroughs back in the early 90's!
Hundreds of people within your whole life, and many just maintain a stable dependence and hide it, cuz you never see them when they aren't well.
@@KatherineClairmont
Exactly. When I got on methadone and started living a more stable life (i.e. An actual job) I noticed and found out about more functioning alcoholics and junkies than I originally thought existed. I’ve had so many co-workers ask me for advice about “friends” or “family” even though I knew the truth before they even asked.
Everybody who hasn’t been hooked is an expert on how to treat people who are.
Im hooked on not taking drugs....
"You have to stop".
a single shot to the head is effective, ask Burrough's ex-wife.
I'm not ready to treat other people who are, yet. I'm still treating myself. (10yrs clean) "One step, one day at a time..."
?
My father was an addict. The book Junky helped me finally stop hating him. I realized that I wasn't mad at my father, but the drug that took him over. I was able to finally get past the hurt he caused me and start to forgive the man controlled by the drug. I love Burroughs.
+Daniel Maguire Whatever gets you through it. I just hate it when people blame the "dope" or "Alcohol" or "demons" that made them do ______. People need to take responsibility for their actions and pain they cause family and loved ones due to addiction. Glad your Dad is doing well. Take Care
@@thepupils209 My motto has always been "Pick up the tab".
@yeahSOwhat BRAVO!! Best comment on this thread!! It's like, there would be no cartel violence if the "War on Drugs" (read: war on freedom) had not been declared.
@@thepupils209 Would you blaim a cancer patient for the pain he caused his family? Would you blame the bi-polar person for not making the right decisions for their family? No, you wouldn't. And you can't put all the blame in the person who is addicted. Addiction is a physical and mental illness. These people physically cant' stop. They don't need hate, they need treatment and support.
Wow! The power of books are crazy! I'm glad it helped you!
I visited his grave not too long ago; it's located in a big beautiful old cemetery in St. Louis. Among the many items people left at his simple headstone were beer cans (some full, some empty), a burned CD in a jewel case, three or four little airplane-sized liquor bottles (vodka and Jack Daniels iirc), a sealed envelope with "for Bill" written on it, and a full pack of Marlboro reds enclosed in a Ziploc bag.
I'm here for a decade of Christmases...
Been on both sides.
This is a ritual for me, and it had been for my partner, who was killed in 2020
R.I.P- Chris ♥️
This always humbles me
Hope this finds you all well this yr!!
I shudder when I remember how awful withdrawal was. I'm fifty in May and I came off methadone in 2014 after 21 years. I immediately and predictably feel back on alcohol but have stopped drinking in the last couple of weeks before it kills me. I'm just smoking weed now.
@@Lee.Carlson I'm 46 , I've been on methadone, and suboxone and now the Seblicate. I have been "opiate" free 7.5 yrs.
Had the same thing, I went back to drinking, and then became homeless.
I now live far from "home", but I take my anxiety meds and weed.
I'm hoping you find some peace. In 2020, I lost my Dad, partner, cousin and 2 childhood friends in 18 days, I thought I'd relapse- but I made a promise to my Dad, not to move backwards...
Best of luck in this New Year.... the 🌎 has gone crazy- buckle up, batten down the hatches!!♥️
@@savage9514 Hehehe. Nice sentiments and sorry for your losses. My only sibling which was my sister a year older than me died in 2016 and I've lost innumerable friends to it. As hard as it is, it's in our own hands to stay clean and alive. I managed to circumvent going to prison but I was hopelessly hooked from eighteen to thirty-seven. I was first offered heroin not long before my seventeenth birthday but didn't take the plunge until I was seventeen and a half...being addicted on a blood chemical level didn't arrive until just over a year later after first trying some. The idea of experimenting with it crept surreptitiously into my nascent teenage psyche over the course of the six months between first being offered it and smoking a few lines. Once you have tasted the sweet nectar of the poppy, you certainly become ensorcelled by its charms. But it leaves an indelible mark on your soul after seeing people at their worst many times. What a world we live in! But I intend to continue beating a path through the jungle that is life. As I fervently hope you do my friend.
@@Lee.Carlson I could not have put that any better. I did some time- for me, at 13, it started with drinking, acid, by 16, cocaine- and just that drug step ladder most of us climb.
I still battle inside with cocaine, as it has been always in my life from 19, till the end of 2021. As my claim is "opiate free", and since I moved, cocaine free. It wasn't till 2029, Covid, all the loss, and the fact Trudeau stuck $4000 in my bank account the day of the mass shooting- we all have to own our own 💩- but I went a little off- no spikes, just smoking but, that was my relapse. Had 3 ozs of weed, a new phone and a carton of smokes, $8000 in the hole, and lessons learned. I don't beat myself up about it. I dealt with so much grief and loss, I could have done worse, or not return from it. I'm a lucky one. We just had 15 deaths in 9 days, new drug being put in everything.
I'm sorry for your losses as well. I just keep saying, I must be here for a reason.... so must you.
Best of luck in this New Year..... keep on smoking that green lol. Keeps me at bay lol
Peace Be with you!!
Amazing story but Jesus if you've ever been there no matter how long ago.. it stirs something up big time. Nonetheless Burroughs kills it as usual, no teacher like experience
Absolutely... the description cuts through you like a knife. Glad not to be there now. Merry Christmas!!
Oh
“Junk is not a kick, it is a way of life.”
- William S Burroughs
@@luke125 Yup, that's what he wrote...
@@vollsticks Wasn't it :
"It's not a habit, it's a way of life" - or am I forgetting my lines? Oh no ! But I am rather in the mood to watch NL than read.
Have to wait for a call - no, not THAT CALL , not anymore, just some agency.
i had a crew of dealers i called faithfully for 7 years. every year at xmas no matter what i'd get a call at 11am to come outside and get my free hit. always reminds me of this.
DougglesMagnificent Drug dealers are people to. Look at George the Greek. No short counts.
never hadda free hit never ever
I never risked it! I knew when Christmas came I saved up a bit of money to last me till a few days.
sold it and bought it, gave some free hits, took some free hits, long gone (subutex now) This Burroughs Story is my dearest Christmas Tale
@@Bonesph Exactly. George the Greek was a right guy.
2nd Xmas watching this. 1rst sober. Cant say I miss being 'on the nod' and so grateful im not sick on this Xmas Eve. Anyone out there struggling please dont give up. Its never too late. You can get out of this life. The real Immaculate 'nod' comes from the freedom of not being a slave to a substance thats running your life. Merry Christmas everyone and stay safe
As a person in recovery, this really hit home. So grateful to have stumbled on this. I've lost so many friends in the past few years to this, I've almost lost count. My heart aches for those who have to spend Christmas this way. How beautifully and artfully presented. So raw, dark, frank, and gritty. The end scene just completely melted me.😢🥲
I've been in recovery for almost eleven years now. This vignette brought it all back- the sweaty twisted nightmare of looking and looking and scoring and looking and scoring and looking and aching and aching and aching and looking and aching....I do not miss the way I used to exist. I saw Burroughs there at the end with his friends and family having Christmas dinner away from all the terrible shit and it made me so grateful that I've been able to have a nice stretch of Christmases with my folks. Those of us in recovery need to be reminded from time to time how terrible it was and how terrible it can be if we're not doing what we're supposed to be doing. My heart goes out to everyone spending this time of year dopesick- I hope and pray they get help. 🙏☮❤🕉
That's the saddest I've ever heard. The junkie, regardless of how he's treated by society, still has good in his heart. All junkies have done shady stuff for junk. Most junkies hate doing what they must to function another day. The hustle wears a life thin. In the grip of a heavy junk addiction, given the options of death or another day of roaming alone and sick, only to be let down multiple times in few hours, death is the often the sought after of the two. The good deed done by the junkie got him right with the maker. No more heart ache brought on by ripping people off, no more lying and being deceitful. God granted him the ultimate nod.
Exactly
I had a friend who was a hardcore tweaker for about 2 yrs. I don't think there was anybody he wouldn't have screwed over to get his fix, unlike Danny.
@@robzilla730 you can’t trust the average tweaker far as you can throw ‘em. funnily enough though, the most honest and trustworthy dude i ever met in all my years of being a street urchin was a huuuge tweaker. i don’t think he’d ever burned anyone in his whole life. & it wasn’t like he was naïve or a pushover either. dude had street smarts. he just didn’t have the constitution for dishonesty.
it really just depends on the person i guess. some would trade their own mother for a bag of dope, while some would rather be sick every single time rather than risk compromising their ideals. people like him are rare, but they exist
Been off of opiates for a year. Reading your comment gave me chills.
Keeping it honest day in night in
“Junk is not a kick, it is a way of life.”
- William S Burroughs
So is selling it all to keep honest right
The Junk Equation: “Junk is not, like alcohol or weed, a means of increased enjoyment of life. Junk is not for kicks, it is a way of life.” - William Burroughs
my new Christmas tradition Is to watch this every year on Christmas
Been a Burroughs fan for a while but just came across this little gem a few months ago
+johnette kelly Welcome to the fold and merry christmas :)
You too thanks
Been clean several years now, addiction is strange.
Even after all the sickness and misery and emptiness that comes with using, your brain finds a way to romanticize it and on occasion you find yourself looking back almost fondly on the time you spent as an addict.
First time I ever saw this, Back in 1997 I was at this guys apartment that was a shooting gallery shit hole just off of Sunset on Sanborn Ave. In LA.. "Good ol Jake the snake" NEways.. we just got off, I did my usual 3 balloon hit, 15 bucks each.... MAN ... I was sitting there.. juuust feeeeeling my dope lol and fucken Jake gets up & turns on the TV & VCR & pops in a cassette. Jake had told me about William S. Burroughs ... and what I watched next was this movie.
You know what brought me here? the death of Prince...
Should show that every year on TV at Christmas instead of the queen's message!
I post it every Christmas eve, as a reminder to those with plenty......so many are much less fortunate
Exactly
Lol, The Queen's Message
(Burroughs wasn't what would be called a "queen" these days, or a "swish" in his time... He knew that gay men weren't all camp, limp-wristed "fops"... He was THE MANLY GAY (which, don't get me wrong, is pretty problematic today... But he was trying to wake people up to the fact that there's no such thing as "gay behaviour".. 'You may be a f*g but you make love like a pimp"-Joan Vollmer to WSB in the late 1940's, I guess) . "This man was disturbing the peace while getting a piece"--that one sheriff who busted WSB and Joan for having sex on the side of the road in their car.
Yeah, WSB didn't conform to ANY fucking box you tried to fit him in!
How many of you would really sacrifice their last piece of happiness on a lonely Christmas night? I for one would sacrifice my pleasure it would remind me too much of my son or daughter in pain... he basically turned into DAD mode and that overpowers anything even drug abuse! Fuck drugs when it comes to saving someone who is truly in pain.
I love the "goddamn alcoholic" line 10:17.
These alcoholics really have it so easy, don't they?
I mean - their medicine is cheap, legal, and available 24 hours a day.
They suffer, too - but, c'mon man . . .
Fatty McFatso LOL---many junkies, including this one, begrudge alcoholics their no risk score of their drug of choice...fucking louts! Drunken shit bags. I know I'm being naughty...and that's just fine!! While we have to risk life and liberty to get our propers.
~Soon Come....It'll be available within the not too distant future. Just like any common Mareewanna-(HEAVY Mexicano Accent;)- dispensary....
~$till have yet to remove the remaining goons in the high-dollah empty suits busily profiting from the human misery machine, elephant-spec social damage, violence, health issues, tax-dollah incinerating "War-On-Drugs/PEOPLE" prohibition of ANYTHING all too often accompanies....
~Those suits being the exact same people greedily working the Black-Market-Back-Door that are heavily invested inducing the "Opiate Crisis" through legal pharma co's, corporate boards & consortiums, bought off doctors & let us not forget the revolving door of "Addiction Treatment Centers" 'jus salivating @ the pro$pect of a never-ending >F>L>O>W> of return cu$tomer$......
~Shades of the Phillip K Dick novel & great rotoscope'd flick: "A Scanner Darkly"
-ENJOY that Buzz & do some TIME TRAVELING/"Ride-Along" WITH US, as a day without a buzz, is a day that never was!....;)
Be Well.....
@@1060michaelg Hey my friend.
@@creightonleerose582 I am a fan of Philip k Dick. You'd enjoy Uncle Bill's Naked Lunch which I am re-reading for the umpteenth time.
Funny, Im listening to WSB 5/18/81 reading @ present moment. Naked lunch is one of my faves as well. One of my best friends uncles, -Mr. Nelson Lyons produced WSB's "Dead City Radio" album. Nelson had some great stories indeed....
Agreed. Opiates arent in the least bit neuro-toxic-(Aside from a few full synthetics-demerol/ect)- they can be taken over looong periods of time w/o any ill effects-(Lifetime user due to chronic pain conditions myself)-
-Seems to slow aging process a bit...
-Havent had a common cold in 10+ YEARS now!--And Im not a rabid hand washer @ all-(occurrence of occasional WD symptoms no doubt trick the body into thinking a flu/cold like virus has been introduced to the body?)-
Its chiefly the prohibition angle that leads to all the "bad" things around such usage...
Morphine/Papaver Somniferum poppies have been with mankind for eons now, so it has a proven, loooooong-term beneficial track record as far as a medicine goes..
Its not "bad" in & of itself, however such neutrally oriented drugs can be WEAPONIZED against a target populations as a means of distraction &/or CONTROL right?
A common hammer can build gorgeous structures for people to occupy/live in, but that same hammer, used in anger/passion can also dash out the brains of an individual, so I suppose its what lies within the heart & intent of the user that matters yes?
Its usage has saved FAR more people historically than any drug OD has taken-(95% of such OD's are POLY-drug overdoses, but the MSM seldom shares that fact)-
Enjoy the book!
~Take care!
15 year heroin addixt. The way he writes about sickness is so dead on, the way he writes about the stealing n all the pantomime of pretend to forget something. It makes me feel not alone.
Yeah. I'm 25 years an addict. Nobody cares except for some good writers like Burroughs, who shows that we still care.
You are not alone❤
@@jeffryhammel3035 there are plenty of people who care. You know where to find these people. They are not out in the streets though
@@jeffryhammel3035 Hey Jeffry. I started popping pills in '98 but didn't get a real habit until October, 2002 when I started on Oxycontin and h...you don't forget that first time you wake up sick and you got nothing...have to start up my money maker, my cab, and three hours later I got enough for a bundle...then I got had a Florida pill mill guy for the Oxycontin a couple days later.
We DO care here on this page, brother. Yeah, you get the occasional asshole who is feeding off people's hardships or trying to live vicariously something he/she doesn't have the guts to try themselves. It takes a lot to survive two decades plus, my friend.. We've all sacrificed varying chunks of ourselves to powder and pill,
We care. I care.
One of my favorite Christmas specials! I watch it every December.
One bad holiday,when I was still on dope I said to my junk buddy " I feel like fucking Danny"...I explained it like a lot of stories here and they didn't understand,at all.It's one of those things you truly have to see first hand.Every opiate addict I know always admits to crying at the end,myself included.Not out of shame,but that sense of joy and relief.
From what I've learned, Nick Donkin directed this film which he also did the music video of Alice In Chains "I stay away". You can definitely see the resemblance in the two as well.
I remember being dope sick and having no money to score only to have a junkie friend see me and hook me up with a fix only because I've helped them out when they were sick. This story always makes me think about those times.
honestly money has never been an issue for me - it's keeping the connections going
@@fattymcfatso1083 The connections… always the connections.
Been clean for 22 years but I had PIC too . 3 of us sometimes on are own but one would help the other if we could. Cop together put money together to get a gram to get a better deal. Not proud but just how it was. Amazingly we all got clean and are still alive although we are still friends we don't hang as much anymore Dunkin donuts once in a while.
I can't stand to see anyone dope sick. I'm an Old J and we look out for one another that way... unless you're a narc, or asshole. That kinda Skaggard can lump it. That's KARMA, Jack.
@@fattymcfatso1083 Freewheeling Freddy sez, "Dope will get you through times of No Money better than Money will get you through times of No Dope". ~Old Doper Poster 1970's
This is the best! It has become a tradition for me every year now, too. It never gets old! Merry Christmas to all. Redemption can be found anywhere.
José Belmar Suck ass poem.
+Lori Crockett I agree.
+José Belmar please adjust your medication.
For me too, Lori. I read it aloud every year for my wife in my best Burroughs voice. Nice message, Lori...All the Best!
Liked, (loved is more like it). I forgot just how good this story and its claymation adaption truly is. For those of you concerned about the plight of poor junkies like Danny the car wiper, it doesn't require a Christmas miracle, just sensible drug policy. Anyway, RIP Bill, you're sorely missed.
merry christmas my junkies and bropiates
This is getting to be a Christmas tradition of mine
Came across this while watching something else. I really enjoyed it. Excellent story telling, loved the voice. Gonna be something I'm gonna want to watch every Christmas along with it's a wonderful Life & my prince song another lonely Christmas. Thank you for who ever posted it
I’ve been clean off heroin for three years now, but I used to always play this when I was dope sick, like REALLY SIC. I know it so well, lived this life for years. I only revisit in now because I’m once again in a position I thought I’d never be.. junk sick. Only this time from the doctors. Had heart surgery to replace my aortic valve damaged by heron use. Had to be on fentanyl for days, took me off last nite. It’s never fun coming off dope no matter what kind it is, all basically the same. Good luck to anyone dealing with addiction. It’s a bitch
God bless you. Stay strong and safe 💪
"I've faked it so many times......." its just a trip to know this behavior stretches back to the great depression........wow.....I know this behavior because I must admit doing it myself
Bella Legosi If you want a great personal account of opiate addiction before the Great Depression (just a FYI--Burroughs started using a year or two after WWII ) check out You Can't Win by Jack Black (no, not that Jack Black!), the autobiographical book influenced Burroughs and shaped his writing. Indeed a common edition has a short foreword/introduction by WSB. Jack Black was a HUGELY interesting dude, look him up and try to read the book because I promise you won't be disappointed! If you liked Junkie you'll almost certainly get a kick out of You Can't Win!
It's that time of year again... Here I am. Every year for the past 9 years.
If you see this godbless you and hope your next Christmas is better then the last 🙏 ✨️
Dropping in for my annual watch. Merry Christmas and happy nods to all of you out there
I've listened to the audio of this nearly every Christmas since 1989, and never knew there was a film.
And I thought my ~2010-2023 streak was long
Junkie life is unique. Gotta have unique traditions.
@@fritzfxx Heh, same here!
As a heroin addict in recovery, I watch this every Christmas to remind me...This, and the 'novel' JUNKY, will help you realise...it's more than you can shoulder. The burden. In NA, they tell you to surrender to the higher power. It works. That's because God listens, and if you want out, he will carry you through hell...but you HAVE to wanna quit...God bless y'all - happy Christmas 2023 ❤🎄❤
Stay strong mate. God be with you.
Hope you still in good health and shape.
Only a heroin addict active or no can truly understand what the car wiper was giving up his already pitiful amount to fix him when he administrator's over to the fella in pain. No self respected addict would give this background noise no thought and proceed to plunge it home so Danny gave up his home in essence. Great story greater writer a personal favourite
Going on 9 years clean. Thank God I don't have to live like that anymore
@@michaelg1060 yeah, i get it. I used drugs for one thing: to stay numb.
I didnt want to feel anything. So when i did get sober i was TERRIFIED.
But honestly, you either get sober or you dont, theres no in between. I hope you get there. God bless
@@christianmendozatapia295 I really appreciate that, Christian.
The shots of them eating dinner at the end always hit me so hard.
6 years clean!
4 years this time 18 last time... Let's do this shit!💪🤨
One of the best Christmas specials.
It actually has a wholesome message at the end.
It really is.
Sorta
But Danny is widely considered to have died at the end
Christmas 2019 you know the drill
Yep.
gotta shop early b/c no one cares about a sick junkie on christmas day
AvE didn't say shit.
Joona Knuutinen did he claim to have?
nope.. happy holidays!
As a former user myself, i can relate to the feelings etc in this piece. I found it a very moving, honest story. It shows that in a twisted way, even junkys are good folk, deep down.
Every year of the the 24 clean ,I have shared this in some way shape or form.
I'll tell folk that , when they tell me their house / car / shed has been robbed. It will warm their hearts 😂
Well it's that time again I watch this on here every Christmas day for the last 8 years. While smoking my Afghany brown.... It's become a ritual.
Hell with all the dope! Opiods are poison. They turn grown men into pussies! I'll never go back to that shit, being a slave to some low life drug dealer. You can have that shit.
I've had kidney stones twice. Absolute killer. Worst pain ever.
+HughieDixon I had them for the first time recently this year....I'd say the pain was second only to snapping my shin bone, then getting muscle spasms in the same leg, while in the hospital, before they could put the rod in. In other words... No sir, I did not enjoy them!
+frankensteinmoneymac A nurse speaking from experience of both told me it was worse pain than giving birth.
+HughieDixon I currently have one - my first one. Luckily my croakie Dr dident step on my pain script or be stingy--as he had a debilitating kidney stone about 40 years ago. Regardless, was just checking to make sure this classic was still up on Youtibe, as it's always a lonely Christmas for me.. and that times almost here..
+ivorytower99 If U live or can be in New Cumberland, PA-- U are welcome in our place for Xmas...Be well.
+1060michaelg ...That has to be the most generous offer I've seen on the internet. Maybe the ballsiest, as well.
I hope everybody here is warm this Christmas.
May you find what comforts you, and brings you peace.
This movie is a true xmas miracle! William Burroughs is my favorite author. My favorite part is seeing him sit down in his living room!
I'm an old Speed freak who used from ages 14- 38. Been clean 25 years. It was possible to read W. Burroughs books as the words didn't jump off the pages when I was wired. There was alot of Dope around in NYC in the 70s. I chipped awhile, but it didn't float my boat. I can see the appeal, though! I was a stone methamphetamine freak, for sure.
Alot of my friends were junkies. We all had drug habits. Regardless of what you use, a habit is a habit. It rules your whole life. You learn to function & are a slave to it, for sure. I don't miss the getting and using and finding the ways and means to get more. I'm content now, and old these days.
I lived fast and didn't die young. But have been dead once, and almost dead other times. That life wasn't pretty, for sure.
In the book, "Last Words" Burroughs is on his deathbed and still attacking The Man and the failed war on drugs. Pick up this book! He wrote it in longhand in notebooks. In bed. Cheers folks.
I lived in Brooklyn when 9'11 occurred. My wife, we were living in PA and she'd had enough of me driving hack so I could always have cash to get at least one bundle a day. Doc Hollidays (?) on Ave A was a great dive bar. The barmaid would take our dope orders collected the cash and left saying "I shall return bearing gifts!!" Heh, only in the GOLES.
Right. A habit is a habit is a habit. I'm in a kind of recovery program...slow going. I dream of dope, wake up with the smell of dope and/or coke in my nostrils...I cry when I realize it's a dream. Opiates, no matter what kind, is a holy bitch to kick. But I would imagine meth is doubly hard. I wish you every happiness in this life. Peace.|
PS-- Last Words a MUST for any Burroughs lover. When he is reminiscing about the Eukodol , the drug, a synthetic Opiate manufactured by the Germans. Quote from Last Words: I guess I used all up in Tangier-- but's it's still out there in Quevedo, Equador, on a dusty back shelf covered with mildew on a South seas island.Maybe up in some Swede town under the Northern Lights.
"Any more of that?"
"Well, yes--a consignment of twenty boxes, 20 in each box. Let you have it all for, well say $100 US dollars."
"Done."
In Last Words, as you know, Uncle Bill wakes up mildly junk sick...he has two other Eukodol fantasies in the book.
Or, the night he wrote; "Chinese food took a heavy toll on my guts. Can hardly wait for dawn and Methadone Maybe a little Codeine. A pinkies packet left, so I think. No...well who can blame and addict's fingers?"
One last Important NOTE: In "Last Words", Burroughs made an appeal to HIS PEOPLE, US, his fans, to carry on the War AGAINST the "Idiotic War on Drugs."
Roughly paraphrased; "If you are my readers, you co-creators go out and punch a hole in the BIG LIE...punch a hole in it
FOR ME. (emphasis mine)
I have tried hard to do just that. Well, Happy Thanksgiving.
Burroughs knows whose naughty and nice. If your nice on Christmas you go on the nod!
Danny walked more than 100 blocks for that hit
Thanks for posting. In a deep, deep, depression Master Burroughs cheered me up a bit...a crack to let the light in...resolved: in 2022 give the world a break and leave no comments on Y. T. Tis irresistible sometimes though isn't it?- to make, maybe A CONNECTION. is there anybody there, where is there and does anybody give a -hit. This was very delightful and it rhymed? and had rhythm...take the edge off...hmm. mother's little helper never grew up...Sincerely Lucy Jordan, Traveling
anonymous anonymous I know this is late, but I give a shit and I hope you are Ok. I'm going through it, too. You're not alone. Hold on. Keep your chin up, head down. Love and Peace.
I watch this every year.. it makes me remember the good times and the bad times..
I share this every Christmas.
The perfect Christmas tale.
God what an amazing story.Burroughs was so talented i love listening to him read.RIP Wiliam Burroughs and i hope when i die perhaps we will meet
Bought this on DVD my freshman year at Rollins College (2004). Been watching it every year since then. Thanks a lot, Uncle Bill. My Christmas tradition.
Classic... If anyone reads anymore, fiction author Thomas C. Stuhr writes some relevant books. Commotion in Mingertown and Man mission and appetite. Give em a read.on A .m a zon.
Merry Christmas... Ive been there... Im still a junky but been stable on methadone. I know someone out there is probably sick on Christmas like I was too many times. I wish I could help you, but know that time slows down but never stands still; you'll survive and get well again.
So to other fellow junkies... Merry Christmas
This story at least the start, is similar to The Priest They Called Him. My friend had a vinyl LP of Burroughs reading the story with Kurt Cobain playing noise guitar over it. It was kick ass.
the truth of the streets, I was homeless and came across characters such like these. its amazing how life on the streets doesn't move. junkies aren't bad people they are hounded by a system that doesn't care. all systems are fascists in there own quirky way
I also lived the horror of having to get up each day, On Empty and that dread knowledge that you had to get up the money SOMEHOW for a bundle and if you were real careful, get you through the day. Every fellow junkie I've ever known wasn't the person they "used to be"; One owned a comic book store...another was a lawyer who hated being a lawyer...it came in handy, though! Me, I used to drive cement mixers and dump trucks and made great money. And every one of us, to the man/woman, SWORE there were lines we'd NEVER CROSS...then watched ourselves step over each one, careful not to erase the line so that we might find our way back, if we cared to. I never thought I'd enter a home and strong-arm a friend for money, but I did. The lucky ones who make it back with what's left of our persons, like me, make amends, live as good a life as we can, try as hard as we can NOT to relapse...and be thankful we are still alive, for our families, our friends, and as a cautionary tale.
So true, gman, all systems ARE fascists in their own way!
1060michaelg I'll never forget that feeling of dread every morning. Waking up in an instant panic in a room without heat in Philly in February. Fucking hell!
I'm still not out of the woods, chipping a few times a week. But it's starting to get a hold of me again.
@@1060michaelg Control! I think in many ways Burroughs was an anarchist... He strove through his writing to discredit and overthrow all systems of control... If that's not anarchism I don't know what is! Apparently he shared a townhouse in NYC with the anarchist writer (and, unfortunately, pederasty advocate) Hakim Bey. Burroughs would insist on a cup of Earl Grey tea to wash down his raw Chinese opium!
@@soulCracka1 How you holding up, brother?
When I first did heroin I said to myself, I wanna feel this way for the rest of my life,, too stupid and in the moment to look into the future, what happens is, first off, you need it everyday, secondly, your system will adapt to it and the sensations will change, needing more and more, eventually it only takes away the sickness of withdrawal, that's when the misery cycle starts, and when your curled up in a ball on the floor with your stomach cramping, your legs doing some crazy stretch thing, your skin is crawling, your freezing and sweating at the same time, it's insidious and you just want it to stop.
As a junkie, Christmas blows!
Watching this has been a Christmas tradition for well over a decade for me. Merry Christmas to all. And to all, an immaculate night. Christmas 2021.
The junkie with a heart of gold🖤
The emaculate high
every junkie knows this , without a fix theres no dignity left . american honesty by Burroughs ,inspired others .
Watch this every Christmas and I listen to his thanksgiving prayer every thanksgiving
Me too
Addiction. Root word, "addicus", Latin. Definition, slave. The human brain is hard wired to become addicted to something. It forces us to spend energy and problem solve to get whatever that goody is. It can't really be ignored. If you're lucky, maybe you will be addicted to something minor like caffein or at worst, nicotine. But sometimes it's crack. Great video!
i discoverd this about 6 years ago, i watched it with a buddy and we were both blown away by it's brutal honesty, shows there is beauty in us all
Have been there, have done that...all familiar ....too familiar....Good Ol faithful. The Bull. Bill. Making a sandwich, taking his time cutting the edges.....it's like I knew him all his life.....
Oh Bill.
Good ol' Danny, he got by giving,,,,,,,, Instant Karma, Peace.
Christmas 2021 you know the drill
This is one of the best Xmas stories ever ... made even better with the background music by The Disposable Heroes of Hiphoprisy
Spare Ass Annie is a fucking great album!
@@vollsticks I fucking love that album. “Dr. Benway Operates” is my favorite track. Sinister.
@@luke125 Nurse: Perhaps the appendix is on the left side doctor, I saw a scar..."Stop looking over my shoulder, I'm coming to that...don't you think I know where an appendix is? I studied appendectomy in 1904 at Harvard!
@@1060michaelg “You squirts couldn’t lance a pimple without electric vibrating scalpel and suture. All the skill’s going outta surgery! All the know how and make due!”
LOL!!
"Did I ever tell you about the time I performed an emergency appendectomy with a rusty sardine can? And once, I was caught without instrument ONE, and removed a uterine tumor with my TEETH. Well, that was in the Upper Effendi and besides...the wench is dead."
Goodhearted junkies are more common then folks think.
@joangordoneielo First, as a Jew, I support Israel of course, too. I have family in Eilat and they are under the gun...I pray Hashem protect Eretz Yisrael and Am Yisrael (CHAI!).
Yes, just now crawling out from under a 22 year run, used every day...with only times of lack and junk sickness the only days I didn't. That makes about 45 days in 22 years. I might as well've been in suspended animation. I missed everything...things I can't get back from not being present with my family.
But to your point; I COULD NOT leave another addict sick, even though I was left ill more than a couple times. That's on THEM.
Yeah, as Burroughs said, "Junkies are a pretty sane lot." Happy Thanksgiving.
merry fuckin christmas everybody
Every time I hear burroughs recite his work I remember exactly why I have his face depicted permanently on my fore-arm. Brilliant writing, it's the only thing christmas related that I can enjoy on June 1st as much as I do on December 24th. By far my favourite. I give this a leviathan sized nod of approval. Great post, cheers.
@Deadbeat Jeff Feel EXACTLY the same way, man! What source did you use for the Uncle Bill tattoo? Yeah, I go to this several times throughout the year and on Christmas Eve, while other folks are reading "Twas The Night Before Christmas", I am reading "The Junky's Christmas" aloud to my wife, who suffered seeing me in the most horrendous (and twice life threatening) withdrawals for many years. Seldom, well, never can I get to through the last paragraph without tears falling and voice trembling. On "maintenance" now (yawn) ...still, better than the life that robbed me of so many years of being emotionally present with my wife and daughter. So true what William wrote---(paraphrasing) "An addict's factual memory might be quite accurate...but his emotional memory is non-existent." This was precisely the case for me. When I "came back", I had to be TOLD so many things...it was no different than being in prison, separated from loved ones for years. Take care---great comment.
Merry Christmas to all, and to all an immaculate night! Christmas afternoon, 2023.
Checking in on Christmas 2020. Merry Christmas, my little flesh-beasts.
And again in 2021.
Cya in 2022
Once again in 2022.
2023 checking in. May you all score for the immaculate fix.
I’m six years and a month free of heroin. No meetings.
This story has always made me teary-eyed. Watching it with claymation dehumanizes it a bit... but, then, I suppose most people would think that about seeing someone in the throes of junk sickness.
Y'all getting too deep on this, just smoke thc. If you wanna be sad I recommend watching this and I haven't even watched it yet. I'm not even high I quit weed
Best Christmas short story ever . Stop motion is really atmospheric . Brilliant .
Merry Christmas to all, and to all an immaculate night! Christmas morning, 2022.
Watching this the day after missing my family Christmas cause my car broke down. Really put things in perspective. Thanks William! Your remembered
Like a thousand golden speedballs hahahaha
This is one of my all time favorites of Burroughs.
“Danny the Car Wiper was on the nod...”
It's almost like an angel whispering it.
The struggle ended.
God Bless all the Junkie's everywhere, peace be with you, and be safe, and may you always find a vein
As someone who's shivering with cold sweats waiting on morphine i can certainly relate. Brilliantly written, truly takes the edge off.
Deadbeat Jeff How are you doing now brother?
I have listened to this many times while waiting to cop. Burroughs' wisened rough yet smooth reading voice is always a tonic
Best for you. I'm a 30 year user. We all care.
@@jeffryhammel3035 30 years & your still going now?!
@@billepperson2662 Hey, B.E. Yes, I used from the early 70's to the very late 90's. We still had a family atmosphere thru it all, and remained human. The last 24 years have been great.
You know now always score before Christmas, the dealer has a family life, us junkies do not.
gotta do your Christmas shopping early. No one cares about a sick junky on Christmas.
I've shared this every Christmas for years.
THE alternative Xmas fable if there ever was one!
stevearle and beautifully real 🌹cheers, all 🍸
stevearle--- It sure is...Only, I wish the picture of the addict giving his last bit of comfort in the world to a sick poor boy in a flop house room would become the new paradigm for sacrifice. An addict can dream...
Exactly
It was so hard to get heroin on Christmas. I’d have to cop a day b4 and make sure that I didn’t touch my Christmas Day fix. This cartoon always reminds me of that. Clean since 2009
Ty for sharing. I had to kick my son out exactly a year ago because of the choices he was making. I'm thinking of him now and praying that he is okay. I will never forget how proud and happy I was 27 years ago when I put his little new born body in Santa 's hands.
Kickin him out, is the worst thing you could do .
Well, I'm praying for you both! May you be reunited in happier circumstances
I’m sorry about your son. I’m not saying what you did was the wrong thing. He may have chose those first experimental doses, but I assure you no addict chooses to live the way they do. It’s the definition of addiction, the absence of choice. It’s not easy but they should be pitied and deserve help.
@@tonypellock5326 there is no such thing as addiction, only things you like doing more than life. The so called addict will experience the pain of going without and withdrawal many times but will always choose to give in to their base nature and use, over and over again. Until one day they choose not to. End of story.
I should add that heroin withdrawal will not kill them , its the lack of willpower to go through it that only LOOKS like they have no control. The rehab industry thrives on such misinformation and those who don't know first hand buy it hook line and sinker.
Throwing someone out on the street like a dog, especially one who is dependent, always improves ones situation.... except people don't even do that to dogs.....
Tried both hammer and morph and absolutely spewed my guts up to the point of having sore ribs for days afterwards. Didn’t like the effect whatsoever and never had the urge to go looking for it afterwards. A tiny bit of morph in a one ml sharp felt ok but certainly didn’t want to have it the next day. I have trouble picturing myself getting hooked on it first go
I watch this every Christmas :)
This christmas was my first not listening to this, my dealer gave me a bag i didn't ask for, just as a christmas gift because im a loyal client, and i cried after because i needed it that day. It has been bad, it doesnt stop being bad, of course, but thats junk. Fentanyl is a harder game with even more moot rewards. At least you can stay well on methadone.
Hoping the new year brings you new habits. Stash somethin for once. Today i found a foil i stashed a month ago and,forgot about entirely, which i couldnt manage to do the entire 8 years ive been strung out.
Best wishes