I'm 19 and Just Got Kicked Out Of My Parent's House, What Should I Do?
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- Опубликовано: 17 авг 2021
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Hi Dave
I hope he remembers to give a financial contribution to the guy he's staying with.
Does he have any other relatives that would take him in and he also contributes to bills, utilities, food.
🎉drskfbukharistudentforlife🎉mbbs🎉
Is it that bad to live in an RV if he lives alone and has a free place to park it?
I mean, if he can get a used one he likes for the cost of 6 months of rent and enjoys living there, after 6 months he would be living rent free.
Lucas gets kicked out his parent's house and immediately calls PAPA Dave! Smart kid.
🥺
Yeah but Dave’s advice to Lucas is not smart! Dave didn’t ask if he has health insurance if he doesn’t work as a lifeguard or if his mom still covers him. Continue working his landscaping biz and if he gets hurt or sick with no health insurance then he’s broke again!
@@JuancoPRoFlow lol
@@JuancoPRoFlow yeah ok so no 19yr ever gets sick or injured. Your thinking this way is why we have people crying they’re broke because they have no health insurance.
@@JuancoPRoFlow i don’t agree, you never know what can happen.
It takes about 20 seconds after listening to Lucas to realize this man is going to become big; not just financially.
Like obese?
how do you know how much food he eats
@@gvsniche7375big socially, more known
So he’s going to build a career in showbiz following an appearance on 600 lb life?
I felt the same.
As a single mum, this has brought tears to my eyes. This young man is working hard and graduated. These people who kick their kids out once they hit 18 just make me sick. My kids have a home with me until I die. I just wish I could take him in but I'm in Australia. I'm sorry this happened to you young fella.
Yes as long as a young person I am working and saving my money to buy my own place. Kids need to be independent
@@maryreyes368well you gotta look at a standpoint too, I just got into it with my stepmom(I’m 23 been around a little bit, but I’m also going in the right direction compared to a year ago). I live in Florida, I make $14.50 an hour. Even if I got rid of the truck payment, I can’t sustain myself when rent is is $1,000. I’m working on getting a better job that could be a career and doesn’t do overtime. She said “you can save for a down payment”, which I responded, even then, it would not be sustainable. So better job/career is my first, then paying off my truck, then place of my own. But she didn’t understand that I don’t make enough to sustain. She makes almost double what I make. That’s why the argument started
@@maryreyes368but at 18-21 I don’t think they need to be independent just yet, especially if they’re doing college, or trade school. I’d say give them time, teach them finances, and how to save, build credit, ect. But don’t kick them out, motivate them to get out on their own
@@maryreyes368this is such an weastern way if thinking, my parents still help me at 22 and I always know that house will always be my home. I think you can be independent and still take some help from them especially with the stupid wage that we have and the rent prices
Agree . 💯
Shout out to the dude that let him stay rent free.
Kudos to this kid for not spending a second trying to criticize his parents or trying to sound like a victim.
He is a victim with the price of rent / housing it’s impossible for a 19 year old to survive his mom is setting him up for failure
@ Jeremy Brown: I wouldn’t jump to conclusions. We don’t know all of the details of their situation or relationship.
Yep, too many manchilds staying at home. You're not a victim, you're an adult.
@@Rob-- an adult who is not even old enough to drink. I hope the kid remembers this when the mom gets too old to work and needs someone to care for her. Id take out a life insurance policy and wait to cash in.
@@rd24life even if you are a victim, it does no good thinking of yourself as a victim.
As a mother , I don’t know how a parent can sleep at night after kicking their child out….
Two sides to all stories
Some parents threaten to cut their kids off if they move out because it’s “abandoning the family”.
Those that shouldn't of ever produced a child
@@misshavisham1287 even that, no parents should do that to their kids, let alone a 19 uear old. If he did something criminally appalling then it could be understandable but if it's monetary issue then that's not okay.
A good parent wants their kid to grow up and become an adult. Unfortunately for society, A lot of mothers think like you do.
The fact that this kid is asking these questions at 19 is amazing.
@PREMiERE PARER lol okay^ Kylie Jenner that you
Well he kind of has too... poor kid
well he was forced to... USA culture of kicking your sons out of the nest first chance never fails to amaze me. Im portuguese and I know that even if I did the most atrocious fuck up I could do with my life the love and shelter that my parents give me would remain. They certainly wouldn't be nice with me but they would be here 100%
I’m 23 and when I was 19 I was Homeless living with a girl who is now my wife
@@bardockshinyikr. Id die if I got kicked out of my house. I have a mental illness so working would be different and hard to find a job because of it even tho I do have an MBA.
I was homeless at 19 also, for two weeks. I was very very scared. I worked and attended college, and left to escape physical abuse without planning it, so I had nowhere to go. I slept in my car, and a friend of mine would let me shower after her older brother would leave to work. After two weeks I found a very small apartment and sometimes I didn't eat because I didn't have money. I had the great idea to apply for food stamps and felt very certain I will quality; I will never forget the lady's face when she told me I didn't and that I needed to be a single mom to qualify. I was shocked, speechless, and crying, all at the same time. This called reminded me of all those years of struggle and loneliness.
Read your state's aid application on line & get an estimate of any benefits. Then call the school advisor (financial aid office) for help after the term has started. Then, armed with info, apply to another office than the first one in the same county. I dealt with officials who were located near my temp job, rather than my residence, but in the same county & their computers were the same.
Now illegal aliens get lots of free goodies
This is because of the extremely outdated laws with welfare. It’s utterly ridiculous and maddening. These laws were set a long time ago when all college kids had wealthy enough parents to send them to college and the parents still took 100% financial care of them. So the government still assumes that if you’re in college, your parents are fully supporting you which is ludicrous! I don’t understand why they haven’t changed these laws because they are making everyone suffer for no reason. There is an unprecedented amount of poor and homeless college students today and the government needs to step up and do something about it because it is 100% discriminatory! 😡
Sounds like he's a hard worker, and the fact that he thought to call Dave makes me think he can put his nose to the grindstone and work things out! Wishing him the best!
He sounds like a good kid and forward thinking. It appalls me parents kick their kids out when there is no criminal or highly immoral activity. With his work ethic and attitude he will do good.
@Christi A lol he’s living with his mentor
@@joshuajohnson9936 Well some parents feel once you reach a certain age it's time to leave. The issues are usually when they don't prepare or warn their kids.
@@spicyshizz2850 he's living with a friend from church.
@@joshuajohnson9936the paradox is that if the kid is a criminal or immoral person they should be looking after them even more as it is their fault they turned out that way in the first place and therefore their responsibility. Imagine your kid is aggressive and remorseless... You kick him out and make him desperate, he goes to rob people and ends up killing someone... What is the result? An innocent dies and the kid goes in prison for a good chunk of their life... The parent killed their kid and an innocent with one move because they didn't want to take responsability for their bad parenting.
I can't stand hearing stories about parents kicking good kids out of the house like that. If you want your kids to be successful, don't do it. This kid sounds like he's got his head on straight and is a real go getter. He's going to be fine I think.
Don't be quick to judge. All we know is he said they don't see eye to eye. It could be much than that.
@@erikhuisman2487 agreed we dont know the whole story
@@erikhuisman2487 exactly . His eye to eye could be not wanting to help out around the house or eating all the food and not contributing.
its pretty common outside of north America. Many of us grow up in small towns and have to move for university. Some parents believe after high school its out of the nest time. Don't just assume "theres more to the story".
@@kazzhulse Growing up in a small town and moving to go to university is VERY common in the US. In many cultures children live with their parents until after they are married. I'd say kids leaving at 17, 18 is MORE common in North America than other places.
I was told to leave my father's house at 17 after my mother died because he needed the room for his new bride. I really don't know how I survived, I worked and slept on alot of sofas. Years later I still don't feel "safe" without a paycheck or self reliance.
It’s so sad. How are you doing now?
Sorry to hear that but speaking from experience you are better off out of that home. My stepmother kicked my brother out at 17. I left at 18. Couldn't stand living with the witch. My father sided with her. That was 30 years ago. I still don't have a relationship with my father. He has been trying to reconcile but I have ZERO INTEREST. And neither will you. Live your best life and screw your pathetic asshole father. He will live to regret his decision.
My story is sadly similar but the Good news is Jesus Christ never left us and were not on the street right now....and we're here to tell the tale. Thank you Jesus ❤
@@KH-nt7ejjust forgive your father it’ll be better for u and him in the long run than keeping that guilt in you your whole life till they die
U can’t be safe or self reliant if u don’t have a job!
Unless u win a lottery
Same type of parents that will be sad when their children never visit them in the nursing home.
You'd be surprised. Sometimes it's the most poorly treated kids who remain loyal to the end.
@@RaisingMyWildflowerstrauma bonded
100 % true
@@RaisingMyWildflowersyeah it’s called Stockholm syndrome
He’s going to get ahead soon. Working hard, using his head to start a business. Ambition will carry the day.
Ambition, persistance, and discipline will pave the way
Or fail and become homeless
@@19erickpana Boomers ruined it for the children and now they're like "just get up at 4am and it will fix everything". You ruined the economy for the next generation.
@@realdragon fail how?
@@riner9 Did you know bossiness can fail and hard work doesn't mean you will always succeed?
This guy sounds very hard working and mature, he will be ok, once he gets his feet under him!
World doesn't works like that
yeah, just being able to speak well at that age means he can already get into a sales career.
"sounds". said he and his parents don't see eye-to-eye meaning a probable disciplinary problem
I've known a lot of incredible workers that can't help themselves to also be criminals.
But yeah, prove you're dependable and hard working. Bosses notice that, it goes a long way.
When you’re 19 you feel like the sky is falling. I’m 26 now and I laugh at how stressed I was for nothing everything works out as long as you have a good work ethics
Does it get better? Easier?
@@GroovySquiddo 35 here. I'm telling you it gets MUCH better....and MUCH easier.
Yes it does when ur parents kick u out and ur living in ur car
It's so nice of you to worry about this young man's place to live and food .
The mentality between your early 20s vs. late 20s is night & day. -sincerely, someone in his mid 20s too
To all the parents out there thinking booting your high school graduate out of the house cold is the best way to motivate them- you are so wrong. It’s a terrible example to set but many parents do it.
My parents was going to charge me rent at 16 becuz I had an after school job and made good money I moved out if I'm going to pay rent I'll pay for my own place with my own rules best thing ever happened to me an independent mind set keeps you independent I'm 56 and have never asked anyone for a DIME if I wanted something I WORKED FOR IT
And people wonder why nursing homes are so filled...
This!!!! 👏🏼👏🏼 Yes!! I will say in non-American cultures parents allow their children to stay home until they get married. This is why those parents typically live with them during their old age.
Please please dont kick ur children out of the jouse just help them stand on their feet us Europeans we keep them home till they want never ever will kick them out breaks my heart
Sad too many Americans have this mind set. I would never throw my child out or charge them rent. Americans and money. They say it's to teach the child responsibility. No, it's more about money more than anything else. Shameful.
This young man should give his friend rent money. Even if a few hundred dollars per month. He gets accustomed to paying rent and helps the friend. If the friend absolutely refuses rent money (they won’t), buy food and offer to pay a utility bill. Don’t ask, just do it. Pay your way if only in a small way.
Yes and do the dishes!!
@@suen5006 And clean up after yourself...
I totally agree with you
Definitely...there are no free rides in life...get used to that early so you dont turn to conning people. A certain bad road.
You are going to have to ask to pay a utility bill. I would state buying food is a better option.
Lucas, don’t forget to put money aside for taxes.
Retirement* 😂
@@CE-vd2px 'Beans & Rice'
He’s making cash…..
I noticed he only mentioned “after tax” for his lifeguard job 😂 so all his landscaping is cash under the table
Taxing = Stealing
Wow this 19 year old man goes to Church, saves money, has a job, and his mom kicks him out.
Probably who knows he could have a step father..
Nobody knows the story ,,, no point in speculation...
This is EXACTLY why America has so many nursing homes! People don't want to take care of their aged parents who practically threw them to the lion's den. Lucas sounds like he's trying his best. :(
I mean they work hard and they dont have time to do so
The next generation is too poor to even take care of themselves.
actually it is because we are keeping too many old people alive. Both my grandmothers were pretty much on life support for 10 years. Our family regrets this....if someone cannot bathe, eat, drink, or go to the bathroom on their own, they need to be released from their body. Not kept alive on minimal support.
I think the real reason is that most people aren't nurses.
@@darishopkins2573 It's deeper than that.
The parents were probably crazy - demanding high rent or being way too strict. Or maybe they were toxic in other ways. He sounds like a good kid. Regardless of the motive, down the road he will see this as a blessing and not a curse because as he mentioned it woke him up. People can move mountains when the alternative is being homeless.
Idk they parents could’ve just had rules and he didn’t follow them. I understand both sides.
Yes, but i think it was mainly because he opted not to go to College, and his parents forced him to pay high rent, which he may have refused? Sounds strange, because based on that conversation with Dave, sounds like he is very hard working and determined...Many parents would love a kid like that!
Or the parents understand that freedom begins at the end of the driveway. Its simple, you are living in their home, you follow the rules. If you cant do that, then its time to move on. Even he said that there were confrontations with his mom and he wanted to do different. OK, he is an adult, he can do different. Mom does NOT have to support his lifestyle.
There is a difference between parents setting some boundaries at 18 and completely cutting him off to the point where he would be homeless if it weren't for that friend.
We honestly don’t know. It sounds like he has somewhat of a toxic family. My parents would of never put me almost homeless at 19.
19 and he has a rough situation God bless him but he made 2k in a week doing landscaping that’s good
I got kicked out at 19 also. Living at home past a certain point stunts one's growth.
Don’t justify your parents not loving you lol. Must be a stinky Person!
Fully agree, but I think 21 is a better cap. That's when you're legally a FULL grown adult, as well as scientifically, knowing that the brain fully develops in your early 20s. During that time, between their late teens and leading up to 21 (18/19-21), give them a nice 2-3 years to land a solid job, save up enough money for an apartment/house down payment and/or a car and then let them finally fly away from the bird's nest and out into the great big world beyond. Or just send them to the military to straighten them out, depending on their behavior and attitude and that can also quickly put them on the right track to future success and proper discipline. :)
@@Vandicoup The brain is always developing dude
exactly... do what people have been doing since forever... stop sucking at the tit... grow up and strike out on your own.............
@@rjp2755no he means fundamentally the brain finishes developing around 25 years old. Look it up
Thirty years ago it was much easier to afford a studio apartment right out of high school. Today it's almost impossible. Rents are way too high and take almost all of your income. This country has become so greedy
A lot depends on where you're willing to live. I mean geographic location. A 19 year old can go anywhere his car will take him, and he has the strength and energy for some really rough but high paying jobs. The trick is to keep his nose clean.
I got a lot of respect for this young man he's really trying. I think he's going to be ok.
At 19 I was on deployment in the middle east, and a little bitter that I couldn't have been one of those trust fund babies, now I could not be more grateful for the experiences.
Thank you and may you be blessed going forward in your life.
Ditto
That’s true if things get bad and he qualifies he can join the armed forces
@@nicolevolcy3511 And be sent to another Vietnam, Iraq, or Afghanistan. Our leaders are so careless with what they break and then refuse to own.
@@nicolevolcy3511
That’s one of the things he should not do!
Kicking your kids out at 18 made sense back in 1958 when they could get a job at a gas station and afford a small single family home.
Now in 2022, even with a college degree making 50k a year, you can't even afford a 1 bedroom apartment without having to split the rent with someone.
That's why I live in my van
I wish we could get an update on this young man. I'm sad for his situation. Not sure HOW a parent can do this, but I believe in Lucas finding his way, since he knew enough to find Dave.
Bless him.
Something tells me this kid is going to do not just fine but really well. The hustle mentality is strong with him.
Sometimes learning to swim after getting shoved in the water is a great thing if you have the right mindset.
Yup.. all out ambition an laser focus is all he needs to succeed..😏
Absolutely agree Three Putt Bogeys that’s exactly what happened to me.
plus he's a lifeguard, so he should swim pretty well.
I think he has the potential to be the next billionaire.
Unless you drowned.
Good luck to this kid. Sounds very motivated.
He's going to end up in trash because he's not going to school
I honestly teared up I've been in his shoes and I was sleeping in my pickup and I was running a lawn care biz I was renting a hotel room for one night every week to get a shower it was a tough life to live for sure!
Jesus! This kid is only 19!!!! Listen to how adult he sounds!!!!
Wait! So he gets kicked out and first thing he thinks of is to call Papa Dave? Dang! Some of us might be working for this kid someday.
I don’t care what the situation is, I would never kick out my 19yr old kid! He’s still a child! I could never sleep at night knowing my kid is out there
Dave is like the dad I never had. I admire him so much.
I have basically done this for daughter. I told her she could stay at home (as long as she is working hard, which she does) as long as she wants to save money. She has done this for around 2 years and has managed to save $0. I told her the other day that she had to start giving me $300 a month in rent or she had to move out. She makes close to $45,000 a year so this is very reasonable. By the way, that $300 a month will be put into a saving to five back to her when she does move out.
You are an awesome parent
How come she saved 0 dollars in a year did you guys talk about this.
@@Dwight_most American kids are so spoiled the entire life that they don’t care about savings . They blame everyone around except themselves… parents are guilty, school is guilty, teachers are guilty, USA is guilty, democrats are guilty, republicans are guilty, the president is guilty 😂EVERYONE except themselves…. It’s called entitled and pretentious personality. I see it every day since I moved to the USA
If she is making that much, I'd be asking 25% with the same idea of giving it to her when she leaves. It's more realistic to what she would actually be spending in the real world. As it is, at 300 I'd never leave
Charge real life prices
Rent
Fire ins/renters ins
Utilities incl cable & internet
Water sewer garbage
Groc unless she buys her own, incl toiletries etc if u buy those
I hope she buys her own clothes already
I hope she has her own car and car ins and cell phn
I would love to hear the phone call in 20 years when your parents call you for help. I hope the best for you!
I agree with you. My parents wanted me out of the house when I was 19 and they both ended up needing me to pay their rent because they were too lazy to get a job and too proud to go on welfare (seriously). I helped them with a good heart and God blessed me abundantly. You know exactly what you are talking about. God bless you 🙏 and your family.
This young man has more together than he thinks.
I feel bad for this guy. But I know how he feels. I had a dysfunctional relationship with my mother and should've moved out when I was 17. If it wasn't for my dad, I'd be on the streets myself. In America, there's no safety net if you become homeless. Once you are homeless, it's hard to get back on your feet. I hope everything works out for him. I also hope his landscaping business will continue to flourish. His parents were probably unreasonable as to why they kicked him out. With some people, they feel they can be rough on their kids just because society was rough with them.
The truth is that the world doesn't owe you a safety net. It's tough out there. I do understand some parents don't prepare their children for that. Mine didn't either, I was on the streets from 15-17. Just try and teach your children how to live, and I'll do the same. Maybe we can avoid the whole problem through rebuilding our foundation. The kids will be too tough to fail 😎
That was why I should have bought a house in the 1980s while in the airforce. I should have bought a second one then a third i
One. I am now 57 and have zero assets and retirement.
@@SN00PICUS You can say "the world doesn't owe you a safety net" but you are living in one of if not the most dangerous developed countries in the world because of that mentality. Crime is financially motivated. Maybe if people didn't have to worry about their basic needs they wouldn't be robbing people and selling drugs to get by. You might have a lot of slackers in society who would do the bare minimum but at least they wouldn't be as incentivized to do crazy shit like kill another human being because all of their money is being spent surviving and they can't go buy a flatscreen.
Also "Just try and teach your children how to live, and I'll do the same. Maybe we can avoid the whole problem through rebuilding our foundation. The kids will be too tough to fail." is the dumbest fucking statement you could make. The people that need a safety net typically NEVER had these privileges. They didn't have parents who raised them well, taught them to succeed, and put them on a good pathway. Poverty breeds poverty. Your entire comment was a nothingburger. Just telling parents to do better like that's going to change the fact these teenagers are coming from broken families who will never heed your words.
If you have just one good friend who might be willing to help, I think you will be okay in this situation..
@@LK-pc4sq Joining the military would be a great option for someone like him. He will do well in whatever field he chooses. If I were in his shoes, I would definitely join the air force.
I got kicked out at 17, I’m over 30 now. Best thing that ever happened to me.
Lost my fsmily to death at 16 dropped out of hugh school got office jobs...was malnourished for several years but I survived and did nothing I ws ashamed of...stripping, hooking, "modeling". No drugs partying. I became a clinical psychologist working secetarial jons on camop...took a decade but then I had a profession and it was all up from there. I became a professor and admimistrator kmew the value of money saved, invested retired 15 yrs early at 50 and have had a great retirement. Had that NOT happemed to me, jad I been a pampered college girl with Daddy paying my way I would never have acheived what I did...God bless the child who has his(or her) own...Billie Holiday
does it ever get better
Sorry you had such an awful family.
Getting kicked out at 17 is definitely not the best thing that’s happened to you
I was 19 at the time my parents got a little tired of putting up with me and kicked me out of the house. I was working only part time I went out that day and got a full time job. Life will go on. God bless you.
Do you still talk to them?
Its a different world now
Boomer?
lazy and sponging off of your parents... wonder why they kicked you out... you were not man enough to strike out on your own................
What year/generation was this?
I lived in my Subaru hatchback for a year while working full time and save up to buy a Mercedes Sprinter bran new and paid cash for a custom conversion. Been living in a vehicle and now my van for 3.5 years and it's great once you get the hang of it! I now have a big savings which is amazing after having been homeless and penniless. Would not change that experience for anything!
wow where are you from aurora!?😍
@@kingslayer2553I'm from the west coast
@@AuroraBernadette thats amazingg im planning to move to California too and i plan on buying a campervan instead of wasting money on rent! but how do you manage water for bathing and cooking if i may ask?🥺 just worried about that!
I’m not a parent but I can’t even think about kicking out my kids especially this young man seems very nice. Some parents are unbelievable 😞
Anyone can sound nice for a few minutes. He could have anger issues for all we know.
You're only hearing one side of the story.
@@garymccarver5006 It doesn't change the fact that its solely an American thing and extremely prevalent. Maybe this case he might have been a problem child... but the other 80% of teenagers forced to leave their homes soon after highschool (entering into college) were definitely not all trouble children.
I want to know where this kid is in 10 years. My predication is that he’s gonna be a millionaire. Keep grinding Lucas!
Either millionaire or a n the streets asking for change
@@alia1824 yes
@@alia1824 I don't think so. He already has a lifeguard job, which means he has skills. He has his own landscaping business, so he's learned a lot from that, too. Also, he didn't talk badly about his family, despite the situation. I'm impressed by him.
I left home at 15 (I’m now 31) is not that bad as long as you got the right people by your side. The only difference vs the average person is that mathematically is harder to build wealth, but you mature faster in many branches of your life, and finances is one of them. Just don’t let yourself think like other people, I myself felt to think like the average Joe for some time and that costed my a little bit of debt. After I found Dave’s channel I found out I always had the right mindset and stopped doing what the people around me were doing. Good luck man! You will struggle, you will sometimes cry, you will grow and you will find that once you reached your goals you will set higher ones!
And my Cuban parents think it is humiliating to them if I even mention moving out.
Families can be stronger together. You seem like you have good parents.
That’s the old-school foreign mindset. Why move out when you can live with your parents?
Yeah my Cuban parents almost begged me to stay when I moved out at 23.
run don't walk
Atleast your parents care about you. Life for a lot of kids in America is really bad. Had to help a friend who was in a similar situation to the caller. He is now doing great and I think the caller will too.
This young man sounds like a very respectful, responsible and hard working person. It sounds like his mom was the problem. I wish this young man all the best for his future.
He is putting on his best face. The mother is not able to present her side of the story. If the mother is the problem and he is as good as he sounds then he should have voluntarily left before being kicked out.
Your parents for life notjust when its inconvenient
@@lindahathaway3519why would he voluntarily leave if he had no where to go since he went to a friend who offered it?
I'm rooting for you Lucas. Keep your head up high and carry on. You got this! One day you will look back at this time in your life and stand tall and be proud of that young 19 year old. You are a great example of someone with determination, hard work pays off. Fly High young man.
he said he and his parent "don't see eye-to-eye" and Dave didn't press him as to why. he may be a bit rebellious over trivial stuff - the facts aren't known.
That is so true, “Whenever someone stays in your home, you need to know when they are leaving”!!!!!
I wonder if that includes 19 year old children?
@@caitlincunningham8354 more like visitors, not your own children
@@caitlincunningham8354 19 is not a child that’s old enough to make any life changing decisions
From the title, I assumed this was a deadbeat kid, but he’s really trying. This is probably for the best for him. Hopefully he and his mom can mend their relationship. Great advice as usual, Papa Dave.
Word of the day is JOB
J. O. B.
@@scottp5262 bye Felicia
The myth of the deadbeat millennial/gen Z kid is perpetuated by boomers so they don't have to feel bad about screwing their grandchildren out of the American dream.
I don’t know if you can determine he’s a deadbeat or not from the conversation. His reasons for leaving weren’t disclosed and it sounds like he is following dreams not income.
Maybe some huge opposing ideology had them at odds, maybe he sees his parents doing something that he is vehemently against and they go to war about it. I pray they reconcile one day if possible
You can tell he’s only got himself. It’s gonna get good for you kid. You might feel weird rn, but I can tell what kind of person you are based on how much you want to accomplish quickly.
He is in the exact same situation that I am in, but I moved in with my grandmother. I’m proud of the kid and hope him all the best, great inspiration.
How are you doing now?
God bless you, hope you are having better days
So now your living off your grandmother. I love people that push their kids on someonel else and don't think twice about the position they put on that person
@@nedrawarwick3840 He or she may be paying rent, buying groceries, helping to care for grandma, and/or doing chores. Why take a swipe at the kid when you have no idea? The fact that the kid is watching Dave Ramsey videos tells me he or she has some idea of the cost of food and shelter.
I remember getting kicked out at 18, it was scary but the best thing to ever happen to me. Same thing with me... just wasn't seeing eye to eye with my parents, was working/going to school/just different life philosophies.
That’s what I’m dealing with rn too I’m 21
I'm dealing with it right now, I'm 20
Your myersbriggs personality is in conflict with theirs
So he's supposed to remain friends with his parents and let them know he cares about them but was kicked out with no savings or proper job and no notice? Unless he ran out himself I would tell the parents to take a hike.
Love suffers long.
@@rd24life that only hurts you
@@rd24life that only hurts you by making yourself the victim. The kid himself didnt throw his parents under the bus and admitted that they had differences...so There is likely a story behind that. Kudos to kid for not playing victim. He will be fine
Some parents are jerks but some kids are good at fibbing . I bet he burned some bridges. You never know.
He left himself. Didn't want to follow parents rules. Nothing wrong with that, and doesn't mean they hate each other.
I’m new here. I just want to remark what a great kid he sounds to be. Millions of people in their 20’s are living with a parent. Most parents these days would be over the moon if their son was hard working and truly grinding and creating a plan. If his parents do not see him in a positive light, they are missing out.
Man a 19 year old seems really focused on alot of important things.I wish him well.He's not playing the victim at all.Good for him.
Life will do that to you when things get real, like trying to survive.
I would never kick my child out…I would do whatever it takes to make our relationship work
He is not a 'child' anymore. He is 19 and is supposed to be beginning to fly on his own.
I am going through this right now...with my 19 year old son.
@@maryhumphrey2236 so that was 20 years ago? Do you have a better relationship today?
@@caitlincunningham8354 probably not to good since she never replied haha...if my parents kicked me out when I was 19 I would forgive them but I would still remember it!!!
@@UAkovalchuk I had been planning on moving out when I turned 18 when I was 16/17...I thought that was normal...20 years ago...
That assumes that both parties are mentally/emotionally able to do so. He said they’d tried counseling.
Rent a room in a house like a college student. Simple
I agree I pay 266$ splitting rent in a 3 bedroom house that is 800$ a month between two other people
Yep exactly
@@jjlempz5866 whoa, a room is 800 to 1000 around here.
@@suen5006 that's what I am saying
It’s hard to find reliable people
Do yourself a favor kid and DONT get anyone knocked up.. That will make it worse.
Wow, Ramsey is great at what he does -- the perfect blend between empathy and sound financial advice.
I have to be grateful that my parents let me to live at home age at 19 years old and I must use the opportunity to build my wealth journey.
My dad has let me and my siblings live (paying rent) at home bc if we lived anywhere by ourselves or with roommates, we'd be struggling and not moving forward even with good paying jobs. (F you California. Almost able to afford a house thanks to my father, can't think him enough for everything.
You are luckier than most!
Man my mom used to kick me out of the house every time she was angry from like I was 13yo
@ grace murrietta,
That's how it's done. People think that having a car or having a mortgage means wealth. Real wealth is being able to multiply cash and having cash flow. No child should start out where they parents did.
19 he’s got a good head on his shoulders 👍🏼
In listening to this poor kid's story about getting kicked out of his mom's house while still a teen I am reminded of the saying, "Be kind to your children. They will pick out your nursing home!"
And many wonder why nursing homes are jammed packed.
Truth is, even the pampered rich kids are quite cruel towards their parents, it is a trendy cool thing to treat elders like dodo on their shoes.
Kids who get kicked from their house... something I can't fathom. How? Why? What??? Not sure they deserve to be parents.
Not everyone is blessed with nonabusive parents.
Kicking out your kid to teach them how to survive is ruining their chance of retirement. It's the exact opposite of what you should do these days. These parents are whack
Yep. Nothing wrong with living with your parents, use that to your advantage to save up money and grow yourself. Kicking out your kids as soon as they turn 18 in 2024 isn't tough love, it's cruelty. It's not the 1970s where you could buy a house with a entry level job.
My 19yr olds son had to go for similar reason. He was having difficulty in his personal life and lashed out for the smallest thing. He however moved out with $15k already saved and a full time job paying $16hr. He finally admitted to us he was spiraling and being on his own opened his eyes. He's happy now and is saving to buy his first home.
Seeing the ground approaching fast get the parachute deployed.
I am having a hard time with my 19 year old son. He works full time and makes good money. He has not been able to save because he collects Legos and video games.
He has paid us a few months of rent but his room and the shared bathroom is a mess and it affects my other children. I have asked him so many times to clean up/keep it clean and he just ignores me. I don't care if he is unorganized as long as it doesn't affect anyone but himself. It is the trash and soda cans and the wet towels that he leaves lying around. And he doesn't eat at the dining table like I have asked so he has many of my plates, bowls, glasses, forks and spoons in his room and game room.
I really want to have my home a clean space that is calm and peaceful. It is a nice home (my dream home that we worked hard for) and he treats it like a garbage can.
My husband and I think it is time for him to have his own place.
@@caitlincunningham8354 Good idea. Give him a deadline. Say: by this time, this is how this place is going to permanently be like. If not, you will need to move by this other time. We love you, but we don't like how your living or effecting everyone around you, so you will need to move to a more private place that you are able to enjoy living as you wish, if you can't be apart of our family values.
@@caitlincunningham8354 it's definitely time. Older siblings can be abusive to the other kids and set a bad example for them too. He is continuing to make bad decisions because there are no consequences. Do what is best for your marriage as this can cause a negative impact.
@@deannatroy8113 yes...we have had the talk...just have not set a date. He seems to think we don't want him around though if we ask him to move out...which is not true. We love him. His siblings all love him and look up to him. They can not understand why he won't just do what we have asked. This has definitely been causing tension in our family.
Some of the most jacked up parental situations make some of the most diligent kids. We were/are determined to have a better life and a better family of our own.
Same thing happened to me at the same age in 1987, and it turned out extremely positive. Lived very cheap for 8 years, bought a house, and I have complete financial freedom today. This young man sounds very solid for his age.
Only problem is you can't buy a house for $35,000 like you probably did. He'll work for 20 years till he can afford 300k in cash
There is more to this story than he is saying. However, I don't think he is the issue, sounds like alcohol or drugs on his parents part. Sounds like he has a good head on his shoulders and I hope the best for him.
I do too! He’s employed, has youth, and is an entrepreneur. Sometimes the difficulties with natural developmental separation lie with the parent, not the kid.
Maybe mom or dad just remarried and new step parent wants him out.
He gave no indication of any drug or alcohol abuse. There's 10 million things it could be. Not all family drama is drugs and alcohol
So your such an expert that you can tell that a person is on Alcohol or drugs just from listening to him for less then 10 minutes
I was thinking more like that he was out of high school and thought it was no longer necessary to follow house rules, because he's an adult. This even happens to the best of kids, and it is the reason I prepare mine to leave by the time a college semester would start. As I told my oldest, I want you to go have fun and live your best life, but I don't care to run into your boyfriend in his towel on the way to the bathroom. They do just fine and they grow up wiser if you guide them into it.
THIS GUY IS A SOLDIER, THESE HARD TIMES WILL MAKE U STRONGER
HANG IN THERE BRO👏🏾👏🏾
First thing I would do is block their numbers.
I'm sure you would. You sound ungrateful.
@@_vakas you sound like your kids are a burden and you use them as leverage.
I was in this position. I got into a union apprenticeship with excellent earnings potential, but no money at the time. I was terrified! I took every side hustle I could find, and slept anywhere there was free or cheap rent for years until I finished the program and started making decent money. Never take having a place to sleep at night for granted.
I don't understand that mentality. How is it American culture is 'I die for my kids', 'battle over custody' and once they reach 19 they are kicked out of the house? And the same people would compliment how cute child or animal is but kick out their own kids. Where is this line between 'i die for you' and 'we have separate lives now you are on your own'?
its not just American, its a universal problem.. parents are the biggest hypocrites..
@@kingslayer2553 it is north american thing in general. in other countries such behavior is an exception
They didn’t catch on the fact that he was staying with a woman. He said it several times.
I didn't catch it too
??
Dave is not going to like that.
Within the first minute, I loved this kid. Lucas, keep up what you're doing. Keep both jobs until the landscaping picks up. There are 168 hours in a week. Use as many as possible, being productive (without burning out). If you have to sleep in your truck, so be it. Give your temporary landlord/friend a few bucks in good faith rent. Eventually, acquire a cheap place to live, such as single room in a house, a studio apartment, shack up with someone looking for a roommate, or even rent a garage and throw a mattress on the floor. Keep the mowers and gas outside (to avoid inhaling fumes). Join planet fitness for $10 a month, to use their shower. You may need a bank account or credit card for that. Do fall clean ups and leaf collection to extend your landscaping season. Line up a winter job to continue making money in the "off season". (Uber eats, pizza delivery, bus boy in a restaurant). Most importantly... DON'T GIVE UP!!! Good luck out there. You will succeed.
Being kicked out at 18 I get where he’s coming from. Shits tough at first and it’s easy to resent your parents after that. But looking back it’s one of the greatest things that has happened. You grow up much faster than all of your peers that went to college because of it. You get a true grasp on the real world
And this parents will complain when their son throws them in a nursing home.
What’s family for??? Support your kids until they are done with college.
Or once he starts making good money, they will welcome him back fast!
we're only hearing his side.
This young man probably needs to stay far away from his mother.
What is family for? I'm sure it's not for indentured slavery to parents!
@@alinatamashevich3354 Hope he runs in the opposite direction.
Just get a cap on the back of you truck and camp in that until you can save enough for a used camper.
That might work somewhere cooler but in Phoenix you can cook cookies in the middle of the night in your car. He would probably die doing that
I don’t see how people in Phoenix live in that heat good gawdddd
I wish I was that smart when I was 19. God bless this young man.
This kid sounds more mature than some 30 years olds I know... This kid is gonna go places
He sounds okay with the situation. But I personally just don't get kicking your kids out. I know he's an adult but transitioning to independence by discussing and planning for it is more my cup of tea than saying hey get out.
It's interesting how different the western world sounds like. From what I've heard and read in the US parents ask the kids to move out at age 18-19.
Us Asians don't really do that unless or until the Kid is well settled. We usually don't risk it at all.
I was out on my own at 18. I worked 66 hours a week and couldn't afford an apartment. Basically homeless.
My 20's were wage slave hell, I often thought of suicide at work. (Fast food). It destroyed my feet standing all day without any breaks (illegal but corporate America has no real laws they need follow).
I worked about 20 hours unpaid overtime, they charged for old uniforms I never received and took the money from my check.
Personally, I would completely ditch my parents if they did that to me. Obviously parents like that don’t care about you. And frankly you can meet some amazing people in your life that would be willing to help you. Hell, I’ve heard of people that are willing to let you stay with them if you’re willing to do work around the house.
Dave seems to have good morals! I respect that. I really liked how he advised the kid to still try to stay in touch with his parents even though they kicked him out.
6:57 I love how he hangs up or mutes the caller in the middle of the conversation. His way of saying, shut up and listen 🤣
Ooooh... sounds like somebody's parents is gonna be in the nursing home when they're old...🙃
Be good care takers?
Maybe parents are good people. Should give benifite of doubt to parents! Hour your father & mother. Irony out differences later. Children may not be best for care takers .
I've seen some pretty ritzy nursing homes...
Nah, not necessarily. Time can heal relationships as well. When he's older with kids of his own, he may understand his mothers perspective and make an effort to make amends. :)
Most people in nursing homes have kids
I'm now 19 going to be 20 this year. I've been homeless since 16 got my flat at 17.
I hear what dave is saying, but I have to disagree about the RV. I’ve done the RV life for a few years, it is definitely the most frugal, the most freeing life. It was a great way to save money I could even work part time I have enough money for everything.
When I was 19 I joined the USAF . I had not been kicked out of my parents home it was just time to go out on my own . It was the best thing I ever did . I became a man calling my own shots .
Thank you for your service
How many years did you live on base?
No, you became a man with a clear cut path to success or failure. Room and board taken care of. I wish I could join the military.
I lived out of my Van for two years while I went to College in California. I was in my mid twenties. Showered at the school gym. Ate at the school cafeteria. Great memories, but I wouldn't want to do it again.
Even Suze Orman started out living in her brother's van in California and look what she did with her life and for other people's lives just like Dave Ramsey
I got kicked out at 18 for literally no reason. At 17, I was told I either go to the college my dad wanted me to go to, or he was kicking me out. spent my time at 17 worried I was going to be homeless that very night. Then I went to that college and got kicked out the day college began. Has derailed my life since.
It's sad!!how is ur life now??
@@UAkovalchuk I mean, not fun, not living up to potential due to lack of support. Both Families hate my marraige, and my brother in Law committed suicide recently.
Wasn't kicked out of the house, but at 17 went away to college on a full-ride scholarship, commissioned in the Marine Corps at 21, bought my first house at 23 and on to my work life. I never felt compelled to leave home, and loved my family dearly. Just time to spread the wings and fly the coup ...
As a parent myself, no one except the parent and the child knows the whole story or the full truth. I wish the best for the young man and hope he, as Andy Griffith said to Opie, "Act like somebody."
I have a son that I'd never throw out no matter what. He wants to leave go ahead I'll help you .. but to throw your adult child out ?
I couldn't do it. That's really sad 😒
I am sure this is what his mom thought too.
@@clarifyingquestions what? How?
Agree.
The mom must be dealing with something.
Kicking a 19 year old kid out these days is practically a death sentence. Either he's hiding something terrible or she's a bad mother.
Sounds like a good kid. Hope he's doing well now.
He helps with budgets, right? What a fine man to help people with their troubles. Bless his heart. I wish I had known him when I was 19 and kicked out because my mother was jealous of my youth.
Same thing I'm going through. My mom is old and bitter
@@sweetestgirl7742 Wow!
This kid is going to go places. It’s hard for him now, but he will learn how to survive, and ultimately strive!!! Many of us have been there!
Im guessing there is more to the story.
Dude I left my parents place at 19 for the same reason and lifeguarded I slept in my car til I bought a camper the struggle is real I’ve been on the road for several years but it allowed me to save for a house