Hearing VOICES?! COMMUNICATING With ALTERS: Part 2 - INTERNAL | Dissociative Identity Disorder
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- Опубликовано: 7 сен 2024
- SEE PART 1 HERE: • COMMUNICATING With ALT...
Part 2 of our series on communicating with Alters in a DID or OSDD System! This video focuses on internal methods of communicating when you have Dissociative Identity Disorder
Filmed and edited by Chloe BEFORE integrating.
Disclaimer: we were taught the phrase used in this video "Chinese Whispers" in school by our teachers at a young age (yes, our teachers!) and therefore never thought about potentially problematic associations that arise from this term. We apologise for our insensitivity on this topic and wan to thank the commenters who have brought it to our attention. We now know that Americans use the phrase "Telephone", and going forward we have adopted this term instead.
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Disclaimer: This channel exists for educational purposes only and we make every effort to provide the most accurate and up-to-date information. However, we are not qualified professionals. DissociaDID acts as a hub for collating scientific resources, and we combine those with advice from our personal experiences of living with DID to create content that is accurate and easy to understand. While we hope it is helpful and provides access to essential resources, DissociaDID is in no way a replacement for the work and advice of practising professionals in the mental health sector.
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#DissociaDID #dissociativeidentitydisorder #mentalhealth
I just want to say thank you so much for providing these videos for the DID community as well as others that don’t have as much knowledge! I’ve recently met someone with DID who I’m slowly becoming friends with them (I’ve never met anyone with DID in real life before) and I’ve been watching your videos for a while and I’m so glad I have your channel to help me understand and help them while knowing the boundaries and not pushing them or making them feel uncomfortable. Thank you so much for spreading awareness and knowledge about DID, I honestly don’t know where I’d be without your system and your videos.
Same! I found out a buddy of mine at work is a system and it has been amazing to have some knowledge on the disorder so I can be a better friend to them.
the last “my name is chloe. i am the host of the system” 🥺 cant wait to meet nin later today 💗
Nope, one more video with Chloe! And live in 25 mins! Can't wait to see you!
Just made me so sad
I was away for a while and am confused. Is Chloe gone? D:
@@kittenbraden9800 chloe integrated (there's a video they made about integration in case you're confused) with nina so now there's a new alter, nin.
@@gracezhang1712 Thank you for the explanation! I was just catching up with the livestream but then that disappeared, too. It's a disorienting day for my autistic brain qq
Chloe: *goes shopping*
Everyone else in the system: ight, imma front
This mostly sound like Kyle
Although we will most likely never meet Chloe again, I want to thank her again for providing these educational videos for us. Cant wait to join the live stream later and meet Nin :)
Apparently theres still one more video with Chloe
I can’t wait to meet Nin later today!! Who’s with me? :D
I have it on my calendar so I don't forget!
I am!
yess :)
It’s 1 am for me so I won’t be able to watch it live 😭
What tine will it be at in the US ( new jersey) ..to be honest I'm very nervous .. I'm really gunna miss chloe
"All of a sudden, everybody wants something" big mom energy
god this is chloe’s last “hey guys it’s chloe!!” 😭 i can’t wait for nin but something inside me will miss chloe dearly. i’m actually crying thinking that chloe is gone but i’m happy of the progress in this system.
ッheale apparently there’s one more video with chloe
Wait what happened? this is my first time looking at a video from this channel
@@akira1086 the host of the system (Chloe) and one the sexual alter (Nina) integrated, forming Nin. she's now the host of the system :).
@@RemoveLola I see, so people miss Chloe as it's a lot to process that both aren't fully them anymore? but a mix of both and thus a new person?
@@akira1086 exactly! like 1+1=1, Nin has things from Chloe and Nina, but she's a different person 💜
It's a little bittersweet to hear Chloe say goodbye one last time. I thank her for all the information and enthusiasm she has provided and now welcome Nin on her new journey!
Thank you! There's one more video with Chloe coming next week!
That makeup is MAGNIFIQUE
I know isn't
"when you communicate with yourself... I'm assuming you can do that"
Personally I do communicate with myself though it's not often in words. It can be feelings and memories. When it does involve words it's a lot like "hm did I turn on the stove? Ok I did cool. Let's turn on some music... No that song is too loud .." it sounds a lot like a mundane conversation
Yeah, it's not really talking to yourself and then getting a response, it's more a way to organize your thoughts by putting things in order or deciding whether or not to do or say something.
Sometimes I just think these thoughts and sometimes I say them out loud (like: Boah, ich bin so blöd! - oh, I am so stupid!). It depends on the topic and whether I am alone. :)
I sometimes speak my thoughts and plans out loud because it helps me focus (i have adhd) and get my thoughts "in line"/"straightened out". I also sometimes talk out loud in a sort of conversation when the rational and the more emotional/impulsive parts of my brain don't agree. Or when I severely regret something (like: why did I do that?) I'll sometimes speak out loud to figure it out. Sometimes it's as easy as "I have poor impulse control" (this answer obviously doesn't help much but it sometimes helps to put aside the feeling of regret and/or guilt when I acknowledge that I f*ed up)but sometimes it's more complicated and again it helps to speak these thoughts out loud because I'll lose my train of thought otherwise.
It’s so funny hearing that because like Chloe, prior to diagnosis I’d always assumed everyone’s “inner monologues” were detailed back and forth conversations & arguments. Eg ‘that song is too loud’ might have 3 opinions including “Its not loud it’s just a crappy song” “no it’s not, you have no taste, I love it!” and “well turn it down a bit then dumbass”.
It’s odd finding out your ‘Normal’ is apparently vastly different from other people’s and yet you couldn’t imagine any other way.
I usually just use my inner dialogue to debate things or check that I’ve done things or remind myself stuff, or tell myself a story when I’m bored (I’m a writer, I’m always telling myself stories) but yeah, sometimes I create people when I need to discuss something in my mind, but they all are the same person that I control singularly and they all have my memories and ideas and they snap out of existence when I’m done
"Watch Hannibal"
"I'm trying to write in the system journal"
"Hannibal."
Lol 😂 someone on the council of Jazz is telling me to watch Hannibal lately, but I'm also feeling a bit vulnerable at the moment and I'm like no, we don't need that kind of psychological encouragement right now, but I agree it's a great show.
There's a few points I just want add to.
1. In the past someone didn't believe I really had alters because I told them I heard voices. I haven't mentioned that ever since then even when someone seemed opened to it because some people seem to think that's a totally different condition. This was really helpful for validating my experiences. Thank you.
2. I can't see inward while I'm fronting. As far as I know David Ace is the only one who is able to do that in our system. He also has the best communication with most of the system since everyone passes by him to get to the front most of the time. I mean he can't be there 24/7 but he is our primary gate keeper and takes shifts with other alters doing different jobs in the inner world. I usually just go to him any time I need to talk to anyone I don't have good communication with.
3. I would describe the difference between a normal inner monologue and hearing the voices of alters like this.
What's normal is when it's my own voice I have complete control over what's being said. Just like speaking out loud I have control over what I say.
When it's an alter I don't have control over what's being said, I might not even agree with what's being said. I will hear at least two or more distinct voices. I'll still hear my own voice as described above as well as a second voice I can't control, or a third, or fourth, and so on.
Often times when it's 3 or more alters at the same time then I can't understand what they're actually saying. It just becomes a bunch of noise as they all talk over each other like sitting in a crowded restaurant. The only people you can maybe hear clearly are the ones sitting at your own table.
I also some times hear a different set of voices that aren't alters. These kinda take on the form of people I know saying horrible things about me. This tends to only happen when I'm feeling social anxiety or I'm depressed and can't find anyone outside my own head to talk to about what's bothering me. This I can tell is different because these voices are more clear yet don't answer when I try talking to them. Alters, assuming I can clearly hear them, do respond when I talk to them.
So yeah I've had three different kinds of inner voices and learned to tell the difference between them because they all behave totally different from each other. I don't always hear the voices... In fact for a while I learned to drawn them out with music but that wasn't the best solution to the problem. Maybe why my communication is so bad is because of that. Anyway, hopefully this helps clearly define the different types of inner voices.
I completely forgot that there will also be a regular video today so this notification made me very happy.
Even though I don't have D.I.D I still enjoy these videos.
Informative as always, we will miss you Chloe...but Nin we cannot WAIT to meet you beautiful!!!!
When she said "telling you what they want for dinner" at 8:58 her face went SO KYLE you know he has come up from the back so many times to be like "Chineseeeee"
With a neurotypical mind, the inner monologue is less of "hearing" the thoughts, and more of just knowing the words that are trying to be communicated. It's kind of like subtitles, almost
I'm not neurotypical(but I do not have DID). My internal monologue is often like literal "hearing", it's just that I'm only hearing myself. It's like a podcast put on 2x.
@@nikiigreen Same. However, I sometimes also need to talk out loud to even know what I'm thinking or get my thoughts straightened out. I have adhd so I don't know if I'm considered neurotypical but it's quite common I think so...
@@cassandramuller7337 ADHD is probably just more recognized than actually more common (much like Autism). You'd be considered neurodivergent.
@@nikiigreen Thanks for the info. Wasn't really sure on it since I've experienced things that "normal" people experience differently but at the same time I know it's much less extreme than DID
@Noname Garofano kind of
I used to write poems and stuff. It’s been a while and I woke up at 2 am and thought I’d share what came to mind. I can’t share it with the people around me. They already look at me like I’ve stuffed puppies into a pillowcase and dropped it in a river. Anyway, I had to put it someplace and this is as good as it gets for me. So here it is. It isn’t finished but if I don’t put it someplace it could be lost to me forever.
LONELINESS.
Alone in a room full of people
Quiet in a sea full of sound
Screaming without opening my mouth.
So many things unsaid
Afraid to break the seal of silence
Living with so many voices in my head
They started so silent and small
But have grown to be many and loud
No words of wisdom or love
Just anger and hate
They burst out oozing from eyes as tears
Flooding my mouth with bile and pain
Alone in a room full of people
Quiet in a sea full of sound
Screaming without opening my mouth.
Very descriptive and raw. Thanks for sharing
I was in isolation most of my childhood. When I went through trauma our natural reaction was to go to someplace where we could be alone and talkso that's what our communication came through so I often talk to out loud to my alters and that's why our communication became better but now that I've grown up and being in isolation isn't as healthy for a person and at my age, it's gotten harder to communicate because I'm always worried about people hearing me talk to my altars and we never worked on the inwards talking so I'm having to learn how to communicate and different way so this video was very prevalent
itslyssam J if you’re worried about people in the outside world hearing you and thinking it’s strange you could get some AirPods, or fake ones because theirs pretty expensive. That way people will probably assume you are just on the phone
Understand more than you know..
Hey, have you watched part 1? Because Chole mentioned an app called Serif. Apparently originally meant for script writing and such.
But honestly it works like a texting app, or better yet... Instant messaging app. But works offline. You can make 'characters'. Thus create profiles for your Alters. And switching back and forth is so seamless with a button right next to typing.
entirely back the recommendation for that app, it's awesome.
And great for situations like yours as well, in my opinion :) (again, understand more than can really say even..)
It's like an instant messenger but works offline and is personal.
Best way to sort thoughts and communicate when a system cannot out loud and environment is otherwise distracting.
(Thank you Chloe, for the recommendation.)
@@Convoluted-and-Exiledso I don't have to wait for them to switch for them to reply?
@@itsembersreality That's.. Tricky to answer because not every system is the same after all. That's something gotta remember. Still learning a lot about all of this..
Sorry to confuse. Should have thought more first.. :(
All can really suggest is to try the app and see what works best for your system..
Don't want to tell anything wrong.
Truly sorry if already have.
Feeling like it depends on the connection a system has from switching to thoughts to communication. Thus not everything will work the same for everyone..
Greatly apologize for not taking that into account prior to this comment :(
Believe it's possible to use it as a transfer from within... As in, an alter is trying to communicate but within the head is just too busy and distracted by things outside it (environment like people being noisy at a park for example), so they channel into that platform.
Cannot speak for other systems connections, switching and communication..
Didn't mean to generalize in the previous comment.. Will be more careful how to word things in the future.
Hope DissociaDID responds or someone else with as much knowledge and experience to put this better.
Again, still learning overall.
And hoping no one attacks for not catching it till your question.
Again, can try it and see what works best for your system.
Was trying to say that the app allows changing profiles with ease, within a conversation setup with profiles added like a group chat, and that if there's a pull of Alters trying to communicate, it's a lot easier. More seamless then say...Separate accounts to log in and out of or anything like that.
But it's something that would have to be seen, tried, and worked with and utilizing best for each system of course..
This is the best it can be described it feels.
Hopefully this isn't juat proving RUclips namesake herr coming out just a Convoluted mess. Trying really hard to make more sense... But feel like foot in mouth now cause initial comment wasn't caught how that could come off as all systems work the same, and that was never intended..
Was trying to help, did so wrongly and that part backfired. Will think things through more first. Sorry again for unintentionally generalizing :(
@@itsembersreality That depends, if you're co-conscious or not for example, do you feel like an alter could communicate through texting/use the body without having to front? We can talk to each other in our head but only the ones who are close to the front and wants to communicate, but I really don't think that anyone of us could use the body to text without fronting. But that's just us, everyone is different.
"like when we go shopping, for example, suddenly everybody wants something" i'm CRYING this is so relatable i'm adhbnlaskdjs
i knowww, i actually laughed out loud at that bc god i feel that. even as a singlet i get that
The whole "looking in" part made me feel so validated. I used to think that it wasnt normal to be able to do that so this video has just made my day. aThank you DissociaDID for another great video
Another tip for external communication is to have letter boxes! I personally use envelopes taped to our fridge where every altar gets one. If you need a message across, write a letter and put it in their box/envelope. This however can take a long time because you have to wait until that person fronts, but I usually send messages like “dont forget to talk to this person” or to littles “write a Christmas wish list” and when you’re fronting you can just check for letters which is also pretty exciting
This is a lovely goodbye to Chloe before meeting Nin, I’m looking forward it x
I just want to say thank you, Chloe you have been such a bright light in my life and I am so glad I came across this channel and system. I’m going to (I already am) miss you and your wonderful personality. I look forward to meeting Nin and seeing how this intagration positively affects this system.
Goodbye Chloe, thank you.
love the fairy lights in the background, so cosy 💖
I’ll really miss you, Chloe. But also it was so exciting meeting Nin in the stream. I can see traits from Chloe and Nina and my nickname is Nim, so we’re almost twinning!!😂 sending all my love to your system. And to Nadia, keep soldiering on little dove. You’ve all got this xx
11:15 Well, I mean, it makes sense. Even as a single thinking out loud often makes it easier to organise your thoughts/concentrate.
Tell me about it. Especially when you have adhd. It's like your brain is a child that'll randomly find a single thought or association (out of the multitued going on during a thought process) shiny and get preoccupied by them instead of the matter at hand. Five minutes later you'll find yourself wondering what you were thinking about.
I don’t have DID, but I’ve got C-PTSD with strong dissociative episodes, and I’m so thankful that you’re so outspoken, and I wish you all luck and happiness going forward and learning how to live as Chloe is now ❤️❤️ you’re all amazing
i dissociated the entirety of this video and had to re-watch it lol.
I didn’t realize that alters literally approach a certain physical point inside the inner world to front to the external world.
so weird watching this after knowing nina and chloe integrated
definitely takes some getting used to but I really do like nin
she´s amazing
Y'alls background is so comforting and warm! It makes me feel at peace when watching your videos! Great video loves! - Matt/Aries ❤♥
0:11 the last time we'll hear that. I can't wait to meet Nin, but I will miss chole. Only 12 more minutes till we do me you Nin. I'm excited, I'm sure we all are.
Learning about DID really helps learning about myself and others around me, like I know for sure that I don’t have DID but hearing about things like talking out loud to communicate with alters helped me with making decisions myself
My single monologue (for me)
Me: do I want a sandwich today?
Me: eh not really I had one yesterday. Pasta sounds pretty good though.
Me: yeah pasta with Alfredo and garlic or maybe the red sauce?
Me nah Alfredo is so much better.
Me: makes pasta sits down to eat
Me: Yup this was a great choice 😍
Me I need to do dishes now...
Me: nevermind I can do it later
End of monologue 😬
amy Neu wow that sounds simple
@@kage2670 Well this is an everyday scenario with sorta a predetermined way it will go. It's like brushing you teeth: once you get used to it you'll probably do it the same way evrry time you do it. However, inner monologues involving an unforseen problem or just a surprise in generall will usually be much more complex. Add in all the images and other associations your brain makes/has during "normal" thought process will quickly turn your inner monologue into a mess. In my case (because i have adhd) that often means that i need to speak out loud to not lose my train of thought.
That's how my brain works too. I always narrate my life in my head
DID Monologue:
Me (Rogue): I'm gonna choose this spoon to eat breakfast with.
Axel: NO, NOT THAT ONE!
Viktor: Choose the other one!
Ikka: No, this one!
Nairobi: Take the other one and clean it first.
Hua: Take all of the spoons out and put them on the counter. Then decide which one to choose.
Lexei (Little): Why are we having this when we can have ice cream?
Finis.
Thank you Chloe for helping me to understand DID. Many hugs and love.
Its wierd coming back to this after the Nin situation has happened. Wow the difference in chole and Nin's voice and mannerisms are so big. Watching the live stream I dont see "chole" or "Nina" I actually see both combined.
That moment when you talked about assuming stuff because you don't know how other people actually think hit pretty deep. I have autism, I know my whole brain works differently than other people, but I have no grasp on how other people experience the world and how it differs, and I've been fascinated with letting people 'switch brains' for a while to truly offer that perspective.
I'm bummed I'll be missing the stream meeting Nin today because we have a family party to attend but I'm so glad you are going to share that with everyone. ♡ lots of love to you and your system!
Is it weird that we Dissociate more when we watch these videos or Pinata's videos? But seriously, i cant praise you guys enough for being so brave and for old Chloe/Nin for giving us and continuing to give us most of this content and the others for helping as well! We love watching you guys so much and it makes us feel a little less crazy
Chloe you explained innerthoughts wonderfully. I love your videos. I have learned so much by your videos, I love them so much
Ill miss Chloe a lot, but im excited for Nin. I know that Nin is Chloe and Nina, but i still miss them both. Chloe taught me almost all i know about DID, but im excited for Nin to teach me new things. I'll miss Chloe and Nina very much, but im excited to learn from Nin and learn what its like to have basically merged with someone
It’s insane how beautiful all of you are even though you’ve each been through so much. It shows how truly beautiful every human is.
Maybe an idea to show the difference between a singular inner monologue and alters reaching out would be a voice over type video where someone could "narrate" what a singular person would typically experience and then do a comparison to with what you've experienced. I think that would be so interesting! Lots of love, can't wait for the live stream later. First one I'll be able to actually catch live!
MultiplicityandMe did a video with actors in the place of her alters to give a demonstration of what a conversation with alters can look like
@@sarahhiggins1515I did see that, it was cool! I'm thinking more like being "interrupted" by an alter. If that makes sense. Let's say someone is washing dishes and then outta nowhere Kyle comes in like a wrecking ball, "I'M HUNGRY!"
To Dissociadid: in case you were still wondering, we singles can "talk to ourselves" in our head
Not everyone (:
We can talk to wash other outside of head with voice of course, both of them are hard but I feel like that’s worse at least to me because it’s scary knowing something just came out of your mouth but don’t have a single clue what you said who you were talking too let alone what about
It's like discovering that some people literally visualize pictures in their head and some people don't at all. Like, if you say "think of an apple," some people will see a detailed picture, some more of a general picture, and some will just think of the concept of an apple.
I came back to this after the livestream. Meeting Nin was lovely, but I truly hope Chloe could feel the love the community had and has for her even despite her struggles.
Since she mentioned them, how are Jade and Ruby? I know they're both a bit dubious about the channel but I hope they're coping well with the integration and maybe warming up a bit to this thing since it's been a while.
i came from anthony's video, and oh my goodness, this is so educational. i've binged so many of your videos. i don't have DID, but i definitely dissociate as a coping mechanism for anxiety. it's scary cause it's happened while driving, and there's giant chunks of my childhood that i don't remember. but yes, thank you for sharing your experiences. ❤️
ive always spoken out loud to my thoughts/voices because i always use to find my side of the conversation would be lost or muddled and id forget entirely of what was going on
I was years ago told it was Psychosis but then later diagnosed with DID now everything makes so much more sense.
My eyes move like that too when I dissociate!! That was so cool how you caught it on camera!! Thank you for your wonderful videos!! So glad I found your channel.
I'm going to miss you so much Chloe.
oof this is more bittersweet than I thought! I will miss Chloe so much, she taught me a lot about DID, a topic that I pretty much knew nothing about before finding this channel. I know she's not truly gone, she's just..."more", and I welcome Nin to this lovely system! But I did find myself tearing up hearing the intro for this video. I hope everyone in the system is doing ok, and if not, just know that better days are ahead! Thank you Chloe (and Nina) for everything.
“speaking out loud sound stupid and silly at first” *laughs in ADHD*
We almost completely communicate internally. I'm (host) still really new to this (started getting the symptoms less than 2 years) but I think we're pretty good at communicating. I can only talk to two alters, and kinda to another if he's very close to the front. But we are aware of who can talk to who so the message gets around. I'm also able to go into the inner world to the places where the alters hang out most, and there's a different place for each alter. They can block me out and one (maybe two) alter I've actually never met or seen but we know who can communicate with them if needed. Talking out loud is a super help, even just to yourself if your brain is a little crowded. Most of our commutation actually comes from bleeding emotions (when one of us starts to feel the emotion and it influences our own) or 'foreign' emotion (when we can feel an emotion but it's clear it's not ours and usually can tell straight away who it's from). And yes, shopping is very loud and busy! 😅
bye bye Chloe, thanks for everything, it was awesome knowing you and you did a great job with this channel, but life goes on and we look forward to new things
I recently found out I have DID and this is how it is for me. My communication is really bad with my alters right now, but since my switches seem pretty occasional I can't rely on the physical world communication as much. I tried talking to my main protector and whenever I try to do the inside the head speaking with him it's hard not to dissociate and become him ^^' It's like we're switching in the driver's seat.
thank you so much chloe for everything you’ve taught us, your fluency when educating people is admirable. im so excited to meet nin and give her a super warm welcome!!
We didn't really get a chance to talk in your most recent live streams, but I just want to say that I really love these videos you do. We are a very young system, and your videos have helped us learn the terminology to explain to our therapist and how to help improve our communication. From all of us here we love your videos, and we're always so excited to see your uploads. Love from the states
What I kinda got from the “buddy system” was that to me it kinda seems like playing telephone?
I’m so excited for the live stream and meeting Nin. Also this is very helpful for me, because our system members only internally communicate are with each other.
Whoa! Watching Nin’s intro and then coming back to this one, Nina voice is very different. Looking forward to the new videos to see Nin and the rest of the system as they navigate you all’s new normal. Lots of love.
About the inner voices!
I don't have DID, and I have only ever been aware of having ONE inner voice.
You've used the movie Inside Out as example before and I loved the "train of thought" that they used. I think that's the supconscious, and whenever I'm "thinking consciously" as, with purpose, the train stops, or like I'm aware that I'm driving the train. So there is only ONE train.
I would image from what Chloe said that having DID might be having multible trains running at once and even if you think consciously, the trains don't stop running, unless maybe if you improve your communication and don't speak over one another 😅
Anyway! Thank you for this amazing channel, Chloe and now to you Nin. It was nice to see you one last time Chloe, you will be missed. Welcome to the world Nin! Watched the live stream, not live, but it was nice to meet you.
Just thank you for all that you are doing. You help more than people with DID by just being an advocate for mental health ❤️
I’ve said it once and I’ll say it once more: YOUR EDITING!! Beautiful! I love the icons, they really help to understand what you’re explaining.
I am so proud of you! This must’ve been so much work ❤️
I'm really early, so I guess I could say some nice words.
I haven't been this interested in something for quite some time. Your 'disorder' is very interesting and really makes me think about if I know someone who has the same thing as you. I've known that this existed for a long time, but I never thought about stuff like an inner world and that all the alters a person has are called a system. It's fascinating and you teach me stuff with every video you make. Keep going Chloe, Nadia, Kyle and everyone else! We love you all!
If you dont follow the system on other platforms you may not have realized that Chloe and Nina have integrated. Chloe and nina no longer exist seperately but as one whole new person whose name is Nin!
@@jasmyng5494 Thank you for explaining that.
Jasmyn Gwatney oh, yes thank you for clearing that up. I haven’t watched recent video’s yet, I’m still watching older video’s (I like to watch in chronical order)
@@maansmokers It hasnt even been mentioned in videos yet! All the info we have is from dissociadids instagram account.
I kinda just zoned out during this video And personal mourned the loss of Chloe. However I just watched the live stream and I freaking LOVE Nin she is so amazing and I feel like I relate to her more than either Nina or Chloe.
Your hair is so gorgeous :000 I absolutely adore this channel, I think you do a great job at describing and informing people about DID
2 videos today??? I feel so loved!! 😍😍
I’ll miss chole but I’m so excited to meet Nin she seems really sweet
Im so excited to meet Nin! im also very impatient ahhh 40 minutes-L/Mika
When you were talking about protectors being useful I could hear Jake (One of our protectors) say "Oh hell ya I am"😂
Meeee tooooo
ahhhh one of ours did too
I'm not sure if i/we have did/OSSD 1b but I think I've got an alter called jake. I've also have lizzie who's the equivalent energy of nadia
I am a singular person that has suffered trauma as an adult and my cognitive skills like memory and organisation just fell apart after that. I actually use that white board thing with myself, only it´s black. I have (re)built up an inner world for myself and in it is a house, and when I close my eyes, and meditate essentially, I can open the door to my inner house and in the hallway there is a black board with chalk and an eraser and there I write what I need to do long term, like within a week, for example call someone back on wednesday. When it is done I go back in and erase the task. It is not 100% percent yet, I still "glitch" sometimes when the board is overflowing with tasks or if I am ill and don´t visit the board in a like a week. (So I still use a paper calender to mark important days and put code words in there). And I am still working on making it a part of my daily routine to check the board. Maybe 5-6 out of 7 days I do this, and I have set up an alarm system with a red light ont the doorstep, if something is near deadline I will see that red light. It will make me dissociate but in a "good way". I´ll be like "oh, I better check the board". Then I will close my eyes for a moment, take a few deep breaths and go inwards to check the board and then go back out again. So, I have made an effort to find ways to communicate with myself like you have with your alters. Thank you for this video, it provided some more ideas for me to communicate with myself. Much love to your whole system.
cant tell u how much i needed this... was struggling sm until this video 🙏🏻
I'm so excited to meet Nin! She seems so lovely
Yes!!!!! speaking out loud helps me SO SO much. thats one reason why i kinda need to live alone lol
This is such a great video! It's a lovely mix between explanation on how things feel and sound, personal experience and what's worked for you and practical easy-to-apply tips. Your channel is truly amazing
Cant wait to meet Nin soon ❤️ hope as is well with the system
I love watching all of your videos and learn about DID. I am diagnosed with cPTSD and/or BPD (different therapists have different diagnoses), so I'm generally interested in learning more about psychology in general. I find your voice really calming and I love the way you always make sure that everyone in your system is safe - it reminds me that I look after myself too and make sure that I am safe instead of just thinking about everybody else. It feels strange though..because I don't even know you, but as soon as I watch your videos I feel "accepted".. (oh, and I just purchased one of the hoodies with your logo on it and am so excited for it to arrive in Germany.. :D )..
You and the ppl like you that help destigmatize this, and like educate ppl (who may or may not have DID)... amazing work. Truly heroic!
I feel really weird watching this. I think I’ve never experienced something like this, that she’s gone but not really gone. I’m sad but still really happy to have met Nin. I wish you all love and happiness and I hope you’re safe and patient. I appreciate everyhting you all do !
Your editing has gotten so much better! It's so cute and bubbly looking, I love the little animations that pop up sometimes
Love how everyone from the stream is coming to this video. Love you Chloe and Nin. Great content as always :D
Was Kyle near the front in this video? At parts I thought I could hear his accent, but I might just be imagining things :)
Chloe also has a slight Essex accent its just not as strong as Kyles I think
Yeah sounds like Kyle was close
It's low because I was tired. I do have an Essex accent, always have, but Kyle's is stronger.
I always did this my entire life at home and now I'm starting to think how people would react to me randomly saying "oh yeah, you're right", "yes, we did", "no, we're not", "what do you mean?" "oh, thank you", "no, it's not" all the time, sometimes having long conversations.
I've been watching y'all since you started. I'll miss Chloe but I'll still support your channel and continue to watch your videos.
Lots of love, Chloe ❤️ miss you already but am so happy to have been able to meet Nin, it’s bittersweet to see aspects of Chloe and Nina in her and can’t wait to get to know her better
I communicate with myself all the time. It's usually in my head, but I prefer to talk to myself. I even address my conscience as Brobro when I talk to it because it makes the whole ordeal more casual. It's usually just mundane conversations, congratulating myself, or getting my thoughts in order. Thank you so much for providing these videos, I personally don't have DID but I enjoy learning about it and these videos are both pleasant and educational. You should do a video on DID in the workplace and if it ever interferes.
I have one identity and depression. Sometimes my inner monologue is a very intentional ongoing voice. This is usually when I need to remember something, like my grocery list. In the far background, almost like white noise or static, is what I consider the depression voice. It isn't always explicitly stating words, sometimes it's feelings. Some days it's quieter, some days it's louder, but it's always there.
Actually answering back my own inner thoughts usually takes intentional effort. So I might be trying to figure out a problem, or plotting a story I want to write, and I will answer myself on the ideas I come up with. I can respond to the depression voice, too, but on quiet days I don't like doing it because that means I need to make it louder and more in focus. It's kind of like trying to tune a radio. Turn the dial one way or the other, and you'll either get depression radio, or static over everything else going on.
about 2 weeks ago i came across one of these videos by accident. id never heard of DID before then. a week ago i was seen by a specialist whos been trying to narrow down the possibilities of whats been going on with me. thats when she said theres a chance i may be dissociating. although there are other things that it may be, ive been watching this systems videos nonstop since. its been an extremely assuring little journey and i feel much more comfortable/ less scared no matter which direction i end up. it was such a crazy coincidence to stumble upon this account at exactly the time i needed it. much love
Can’t wait for the livestream!
I hope this information you’ve provided helps a lot of systems and improves communication and relationships within systems.
Much love to the DissociaDID system and Nin especially. We love you so much and can’t wait to see you❤️❤️❤️
edit: does each alter have their own inner monologue? I would assume so but I wanted to be sure
What editing software do you use? Because this is gorgeous! Great video today! I’m excited for the livestream later too!
Thank you! I use imovie and filmora ♥️♥️♥️
Nin, do you know of hearing voices (internally, not external hallucinations) in other dissociative disorders (depers/dereal/osdd)? I feel like I experience this but because I don't have fully formed personalities it's really hard to communicate or listen to those voices. Thank you for the awesome video!
I have the same problem, if you have voices and amnesia but the personalities arent fully formed or distinct, try lookin in osdd-1a. There isnt much info about it as much as the other disorders tho
My heart is aching a bit over the integration news since I followed you from the start, I've grown so attached to Chloe! But I can't wait to meet Nin, I'm sure they are as amazing as every other part of the system and I will love them all them all the same 💖 hope it's for the best and you are all safe and comfortable!
Wonder how this will affect your relationship with the Piñata system 🤔 I'm trying to watch the livestream but it wasnt loading so I hope I can tune in at some point!
I love these videos, getting to know your system and more about this disorder. While it is kind of sad to know Chloe herself is gone in a way, I am so excited to meet Nin, I am already sure she is absolutely lovely :)
So weird to see this video of Chloe almost right after I watched the livestream from earlier ! Can’t wait to see videos with Nin though !
I bet is hard to find an aesthetic when you have DID
I have OSDD, ADHD and BPD and lemme tell you- it's IMPOSSIBLE. The nearest thing that pleases everyone is to dress very neutral and plain, mostly in gray.
YES! Im in therapy currently and believe I might have OSDD and let me tell you- If I have to go from ouji/lolita to emo to goth to soft to cottagecore etc etc one more time I am going to LOSE it.
Don't forget sexuality and gender too! The struggle ;;;
We all have are own!!
My gatekeeper is mute it’s very fun. It’s like “I feel you baby. You can come out.” But she is gone for days at a time. So fun😂
7:01 you must be looking into my brain too because I'm building in the sims right now! 🤣
My alters are able to communicate freely, which is often horrible. Considering I only have 2 (that i know of. Jesus I hope there aren't more I don't know about).
I do have a slightly harder time communicating with Oscar, he's very quiet and introverted. E is usually really close to the front, she's a protector/prosecutor. It's hard to describe. She's insanely rude to me but she's also the one who takes control when I'm in triggering situations. Oscar has started being more of a protector since he made himself known but he doesn't know much about the body and me (host). He's newer to my friends and he doesn't often communicate with what he's exactly here for you. He has shown to be defensive of me. He often times tries to correct E when she turns against me. Part of E's trauma was extreme hate against herself and self harm. So she's very damaging to the body and me. She dislikes me. Oscar has started to become a stronger protector than E was and I believe she's slowly allowing him to handle situations he's better to deal with.
Anyway I did not realize that this comment was so long, Oscar was kinda co operating with me and had me clarify some things because he didn't think people would understand.
Oof okay bye
I came from watching the integration video and wow, I didn’t realise just how much Nin and chloe are different. Hearing their voices side by side like that really put it into perspective.
Lovely last message from Chloe, loved your live, so nice to meet you Nin x
I miss her but I met Nin now in the stream and she is awesome. She will do such a good job with this channel
Hi. I' m new to the channel. I don' t have DID, but i' m interested of mental diseases and love learning things about them, especially about DID. And i learned too much things from you guys. Both about DID, both about myself. I' ve corrected my wrongs about DID with few videos and i' m going to watch every video in the channel as could as possible to learn and enjoy. All of you are very brave, good and fantastic, i love all of you. All of you are important for each other, for the community and for the people who doesn' t know too much things about DID. I hope you have a nice day/night :D
Badger, she/her