I understand, but in a way it’s attacking men. Which was the problem in the first place right?…. Attacking woman. And you made fun of men after saying men immaturely look at woman so isn’t that immature too making fun of men? Can we all get along :)
Also wasn’t there phots of her floating around in her tank top and everyone talking about her breasts. I remember seeing a photo taken, wasn’t she underaged? :/
The men in my office would always tell me “you’d look so much better with your hair down”. I would simply smile & reply that “my hair is not about you, you have a nice day.”
No, you see, guys can take compliments or suggestions without getting upset. I've had female co-workers telling me I look better with a shaved bald head, vs when I had hair. I didn't complain about it or cry in a corner.
@@HazZzel- it’s kind of a “damned if you do, damned if you don’t” situation. too many times i’ve seen girls advertising modest clothing be called “brainwashed”, but have girls who advertise less-modest clothing be called terrible names. it’s also about which audience receives your content (on socmed, ofc. i’ve never seen a real-life example of this but i’m sure i will sometime) because especially on socmed, a lot of people don’t realise that commenting on posts = being recommended the very things they hate. so the comments are almost always attracting the wrong enraged crowds
I think we forget about Turning Red. The movie itself received a lot of criticism, but i think it's a perfect representation of our teenage years. Usually girls are forced to grow up, to take a lot of responsibility at a young age (specially for people of colour, i have experienced), to stop thinking about 'childish' things, while boys are given more freedom to enjoyed boyish things; why is it bad or cringe for a girl to like boybands, or fanfics or romance books? Why is it bad to let young girls be kids? I loved the movie bcuz i related to it so much, that was me when i was 11-14 years old, it felt so good to have that kind of representation on media. Sorry if it doesn't make sense, english is not my main language.
I know right.. I almost always notice that society gets mad at women who are"Way too independent" not realizing that most girls before adult hood, are taught by their parents to be independent, to cook, to clean, to act a certain way, yet "a lot" of times, the boys are just raised to coexist, grow up, move out, and get a job. I know that both sides, women, and men, have their own problems. But when it does come to childhood, i notice that the girls are expected to live up to a certain lifestyle, and when they dont, their family is disappointed.
This!! As a Gen Z AFAB (Although I identify as bigender), I've always been expected to like certain things because my female peers liked it. I was expected to be this make-up obsessed Taylor Swift-listening that girl who dressed in all those aesthetic clothes you'd see on TikTok, when I'm like that at all. I'm a nerdy cutecore gamer who watches anime 24\7 and always has their nose on the books. But I'm always judged for liking what I like. My female classmates, while nice, would sort of infantilize me and not take me seriously most of the time. And my male classmates would straight up run away from me if I even dared to talk about video games with them. This happened in both my former and my current school. And my parents are heavily pressuring me to be like my classmates as well. I once cried because my mom baraded me for wanting to wear a Sonic hoodie instead of what my female classmates wore
@@melodi_bunniez I have had a similar experience to you in school. And i am telling you, that if they are making sly remarks about you, they weren't "nice"...but jealous. Most of the time when some girls hate you for liking what you like, and being how you are, it is because they want that for themselves, yet dont have it, so they degrade you for it.
That one threw me for a loop.... I did not watch it, BUT I do know of the story behind the entire project & what it was originally & how it was deadaxx already like 80% shot just for these 2 DUSTY XYs to do what they did. I did NOT need to watch it & I STILL saw wayyyy too much with people breaking down the hot over filled landfill poisoning the atmosphere straight GARBAGE that they felt so righteously entitled/justified to "make better" 💀🤮
Im pretty sure the weekend made sam levinson reshoot most of the show for his own idea/gaze (could be pulling this out of my ass but i know I heard this somewhere)
The “modesty gets shamed” part of the video is, in my personal experience, very real. I used to be deathly insecure about my body so I’d always go to school in sweatpants & a hoodie and people used to make these insane rumours about me being a “drug addict” all because I didn’t wear any form fitting clothes :/ I eventually started feeling insecure even while wearing baggy clothes
I’m sorry you had to go through that! But it’s just so weird because if you show skin you are going to b called “attention-seeking” then if you cover up people are going to ask why you’re doing that and make all sorts of rumours about you, it’s messed up!
Women complaining about men treating them horribly, is the same as women complaining about other women, for looking provocative and intimidating to men.
@NkirukasWrld I also feel that nudity isn't the issue its the sexulisation of bodies. It's the sexualisation of nudity. Eg. If breasts were less sexualised women would actually be able to be less modest and havw topless rights which would actually be better for women.
@@NkirukasWrldthis is where we need to learn to stop worrying about the judgment/what others think. If you are ashamed of it, they will shame you for it.
16:21 the “modesty gets shamed” is such an interesting topic, I have potential reasons to why that is! 1- it’s seen as a restriction 2- it’s seen as regressive and prudish 3- it’s seen as boring and uninteresting
@Barree1Religion, It’s a significant factor when it comes down to modesty because it’s associated with moralistic values that are ingrained into the the religion. Ex: A woman who covers herself up and doesn’t show her desirable traits is considered a woman with good qualities and morality, Opposite of that is considered immoral and lacking qualities even if the woman actually has good qualities. Cultural beliefs also play a role in modesty
@@lalaland2107 There’s nothing wrong with wearing modest clothes, I would assume the peers around you think immodesty is ‘fun’ and ‘trendy’ so they’d pressure you and shame you for not being like them. It does suck to be othered by people for what seems to be a very trivial reason such as not wearing the same clothing.
I always found it ridiculous that modesty could ever be seen as a bad thing in any way. The only time it's bad is when it's forced or unreasonable. My personal stance is, as long as an individual is covered enough to not be indecent ( showing privates, butt cheeks, boobs, etc ), it doesn't matter. And that's because of taking into account the comfort levels of the people around you, which I think people should be considerate of.
The worst thing about this topic it’s notice that even the perspective that we have upon ourselves it’s majority build on the male perspective, I remember being an adolescent and dress, eat, live wondering if I look attractive, even alone, judging myself for just being human
I agree... Yeah, sadly the patriarchal society has an influence on girl's and women's choices, so they compete based on looks, to get their "man prize" and have a good time with them.
@@shoobamocha as if it cant be a woman? I find it so weird that some women like you always find ways to hate on men lol. Like "oh? I got insecurity issues? Imma call it the shitty man in my head" Girls have literally given me so many more insecurities than guys did. I know my own experience doesnt mean sh1t but still. Its unfair to put everything wrong in our personal lives on men when it isnt so (Im going off topic now kinda but still fair warning) I was r worded when i was a kid for yearsss by 2 women who were maids in my house, and no one took it seriously enough like "its fine theyre women cant do much harm" its a weird way to think We angelize women. Even on pinterest till this day i see women saying "i will always support amber (heard), shes a woman and girls support girls" and its so weird to me. In a hetero relationship if theres abuse by the man only hes the abuser but if the woman is the abuser then the man must have been one too
@@Jia-po2uf Oh boy. I meant that women see and judge themselves through the male gaze, which is often true. Women are not angelized, that's actually a joke and hints you're one of those guys who thinks women have it easy?... Women are always judged more harshly and face worse consequence socially and legally, I've noticed it my whole life. Male privilege is blatant, so blatant that they take it for granted. Don't pretend like men don't always give other men passes and the benefit of the doubt over the most horrible things. Amber Heard was treated abhorrently in all media when she was a victim of abuse, of course some people want to support her because it's a sympathetic experience that a lot of us relate to. I don't mean to trigger you about personal trauma, your experiences have nothing to do with what I said and it's a separate issue. But it seems like you, like other men, have a bone to pick and lash out at these discussions about bigger picture issues. There's no need to take it personally. And yes I will continue "hating" m3n and they will continue dehumanizing, torturing, and killing us as they have been forever.
@@Jia-po2uf the discussion was about the male gaze and its effects.....maybe you missed that part ??because yes for this specific problem ,it has been majorly caused and influenced by men and it definitely has caused insecurities for women all over . No shit she called the voice a man ...cos it literally stems from that gaze ??? no one blamed men for ALL of women's problems lmao ??where did anyone mention or even insinuate that ... You're not forced to think of that voice as a man if it triggers this much anger in you lmao . Sorry about your unfortunate encounters with the women in your life , thats horrible and disgusting but it doesn't disprove this specific issue
The first movie that comes to my mind when I think about this topic is Lolita, a book about a perverse and creepy guy forcing his way into a child life, was transformed into a movie about a sexualized and matured adolescent that throws herself upon a poor adult man, trying desperately to make the audience believe that this could be love. It’s just terrifying to think how much manipulation Hollywood can do in the real life, without people noticing
I love how the lolita FASHION is actually about modesty while still being cute and fashionable. The fashion movement is proof that being modest doesn’t mean being ugly.
That movie is from the 60s or 50s, move tf on!!!, plus the original concept was something a lot of people back in the day wouldn't understand because 17 yo girls used to be withbolder guys , Elvis was dating Priscilla when she was like 15 and he was 20 something, in those days it wasn't seen as creepy
Female gaze can be worse sometimes...most women have so much internalised misogyny that they are constantly comparing themselves to other women. Women use less attractive women to boost thier ego's, the amount of times ive had women stare intensely at me and then smirk is disturbing, other people using your misfortune to get happiness is horrible. Ive had countless men stare at me and tell me im ugly which is obviously hurtful but there's something worse about someone gaining confidence using your misfortune
Yeah, despite the fact that honesty can be painfull (coming from men), the pain is worse when you know, that you get manipulated as an unfortunate victim and then get isolated for it (coming from women). Both sides are creepy, with the one being physical (male) and the other one being verbal (female).
@@zyyl1949Nope, that's internalised misogyny and it's more rampant, than you think.💀 These girlies and women, are dragging down each other, because all of them have been affected by the patriarchy and want to look good for the male gaze. Similarly to how guys and men fight competitively against each other, for female attention. We all are down bad.
Something that I noticed when I watched Barbie was the difference in outfits that Margot were in the begging and in the final. The yellow dress was so simple, soft and elegant showing a lot of the emotions of the characters, although all that I heard from people near me was how ugly was compared with others outfits, the moment were she was vulnerable and finding herself. Just something that I noticed. I loved the movie so much
that euphoria show, (as a girl who has v small boobs) destroyed my self esteem and gave so many young boys reason to harass and shame girls my age who didn’t have the “sydney” body. it’s literally triggering for me and we need to talk about how society grooms us girls less attractive, to hate those that are. and then we get called “haters” and “sensitive” when we were groomed to feel this envy and hate. so sad
Just know that you are not alone. Even women face not just misogyny by men, but also internalised misogyny by other random women. Society is just more horrible to you, if you are a female person, instead of male.
Its interesting that as a grown woman I've subconsciously learned how to dress and behave to get male attention and it really starts from back when you're a teen you do it without realizing that you're becoming a prisoner of a male gaze and your identity is reduced to being an object of satisfaction. I know that media and cinema plays a huge part in defining gender roles but really it starts from your parents, your siblings your peers and the just the society as a whole regardless of your geographical location it usually boils down to the exact same thing female objectification that we exist purely for the function of male objectification that includes child rearing, house chores and of course looking the fucking part while doing all of that modern woman has to also chip in with the bills its truly a mans world no matter where you are in the world and what you do they "men" aka the world doesn't care about what you want . I'm into filmmaking and story telling and for years I felt so inferior and so small I felt my story didn't matter in the grand scheme of things in other words "male" world and their perspective but f*ck them all (not all lol I'm sure they are good guys out there) I think unless a lot of female story tellers come into the scene and start telling their story and their perspective we'll all just be left in the mud, I believe cinema and media has a power to change perspective , I really believe that now that I'm a bit older and wiser. And Greta's work has been amazing I've watched most of her films except Barbie I know ironic, but I really wish more female storytellers would be courageous enough to fight for their voice.
Well yes because you ladies expect us to make the first move. Of course we are going to be influenced by how you look because we don't have any other information about you.
@@Navaniity using phrases like "prisoner of male gaze" "reduced to objects of satisfaction" seam a bit hyperbolic. In general, men and women want someone they are physically attracted to
Wow the way you explained the skirt scene👏🏼 the male gaze version seems like it wasn’t intended for the (entire) audience to feel the fear and discomfort for her character. The only thing the male audience will take away is how attractive she is by making her purposely look extra sexy as she gets pressured into it - thanks for talking about this! Love your videos🫶🏼
As a man I def understand you and her takes on the seen and I even like what she suggested they could have done instead, tho I disagree on the effect the scene had on men. I personally felt immediate fear, discomfort, and even disgust as I see the female character that just wants to be respected made to do such things. I feel a mans need and want to protect takes forefront of the mind in a scene like that instead of just going "now that's one hot lady." But I also understand that scene could be very triggering to watch for anyone that's been in a situation like that before.
Does anyone else feel like the phrase “men are visual creatures” is similar to the phrase “boys will be boys” in that they both excuse males for acting immature and gross?
Not even close to the same, there are scientific studies on this, it's proven to be within Men's psychology in much greater levels compared to Women who are more likely to need a connection first for their desire to turn into attraction. With that said immaturity and being gross isn't exclusive to anyone, the Men you're talking about just have no self control.
can u plz make a video on straight men being uncomfortable around gay men because they think theyre hitting on them the way they hit on women? and how simultaneously they secretly hookup with each other and do sexual hinting things that are deemed as platonic but could be a contribution to being closeted and fragile masculinity?
That’s very specific 😂 Got some stories? I always feel uncomfortable around gay men because majority that I’ve met act feminine and I’m not used to it. Like I don’t avoid anyone but, it is weird. I don’t think I can have one in my close friend group because they’d definitely feel out of place. I feel like not being around that environment also contributes. I have no gay friends that are men. I feel they hang out with women more, like the women troupe of always having a gay best friend. I don’t doubt there are masculine gay men, I just haven’t met one.
@@KingKissan No I haven’t why is that surprising? I’ve actually only met one gay man. They are minority on top of that I’m not gay, i am an introvert, and they usually don’t roll in my hobbies to my knowledge at least.
GIRLLLL, I am so happy I saw this vid because this conversation is what I needed! Please continue the video beyond Hollywood! I am very tired of the oversexualization & sad how it’ll effect younger kids at an early age :/ I always think.. imagine we were only balls of light all looking the same but had our personalities…would the popular ppl now still be popular? It’ll really be based on ur character so the focus needs to be learning self validation before the external. It’s hard to unlearn cuz I’m doing it now but never to late to start ✨✨✨🎉
This is super interesting and worth discussing. This reminds me of the Bechdel test. The test asks whether a work features at least two female characters who have a conversation about something other than a man. I wonder if movies with the female gaze have ever passed this test
As a young woman who grew up right outside D.C and went in and out of it all the time, you honestly can't look anyone in the eye or talk to someone even if it's a "hello" because it's seen as an open invitation to start harassing you. I used to be friendly to people trying to talk to me on the street and it was okay for a while, but it became a problem the more I aged up and became pretty. So, no matter who passes me (because you can be harassed by anyone) I will first scan in front of me to see what's going on, and then I'll look straight ahead as I pass a person. I will also watch the walls of buildings or fences to look out for shadows/people behind me. I also wear sunglasses a lot and I do NOT listen to music so I can be alert of my surroundings. I have bypassed hundreds of bad situations by doing those things since hitting puberty. Is that sad? Absolutely, but I just can't trust strangers to act appropriately. And I must add that it didn't matter how I dressed either regarding walking around D.C and the surrounding big cities of D,C, so the argument of wearing baggy clothes doesn't always work, but it sometimes can depending on the creep. Funnily enough, what does get people to turn away or cross the street are my Wicked Clothes shirts with demons on them 😂
The demons will do it, happened with Doja😂 I'm so sorry that you have to constantly be aware, it is a fudged up society, but the way you dress %100 has nothing to do with it. I do recommend some safety precautions, like a weapon or something small and handy, in case for harassment
@@doobydool I actually like the demon look Doja Cat is going for 😆 But I love the metal, punk, and rock vibe and Halloween aesthetic, so I am biased. I have a taser and pepper spray in my bag at all times. It definitely makes me feel better out alone even in crowded spaces.
Thank you!! I’m really interested in this topic and it applies to so much areas of our life so I definitely see myself making another video on it and expanding it beyond Hollywood! Thanks for watching!!🙏🏾💕
ahh i love watching your videos so much nk!! not only is your voice suuuper soothing, but you explain stuff so well, while also keeping things interesting. never stop making videos 🥹🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾
This is the sweetest comment ever omgg🥹🥹thank you so muchhhh!! It’s funny you say that about my voice because I used to get made fun of for having a “low” voice 😂 jokes on them I guess🤣but thank you truly I’m very glad you enjoyed this video!!💕💕
I think us women need to reject internally the concept of attracting or wanting anything to do with bad boys or alpha males by being shy or cool or wild or whatever i think thats when we will trully shine and be our true self :)
I hope we will stop caring so much what other people think of us, whether men or women. I don’t need to join a “movement”; I just need to let go of the pressure to please other people with my appearance and choose to focus on my own goals. It helps to have the support and approval of people around you, but you don’t NEED it. The phrase “boys will be boys” (though obnoxious to many of us) is true: we don’t have the power to change the male gaze, because men are less susceptible to societal pressure than women tend to be. Social independence (aka doing what you want no matter what others think) has historically been more valued by men than by women. The answer is not to try harder to control men; the answer is to set ourselves free and stop letting other people’s opinions dictate our choices.
Despite the phrase "boys will be boys" I have also heard that men and women can't be friends. In reality, I had a male childhood friend when I was in school for many years. So basically I broke one stereotype that tends to be said about boys and girls relationship lol.
this “social independence” you speak of is only possible because men are allowed to do what they want and still be treated with decency. we don’t live in a vacuum, how other people view you has an affect on your life. the male gaze is what causes a lot of women to be sexually harassed and assaulted. “stop caring so much about what other people think” is not a solution
I think we need more women directors in Hollywood. I was so shocked when my aunt told me she didn't like the 'Barbie' movie and found it stranger that my younger cousin who is male liked it, but yeah to each their own.
We all know about that disgusting, pedofile like male gaze, honestly I think it was made through time by subjective wishes of male directors and writers. AS FOR FEMALE GAZE, there are many different versions, depending on what we are discussing about. There is the one about abs and handsome face over talent, which some actors suffered yet gained popularity for it. It's also shifting trough time, in some cases I think it goes into a much healthier direction with portraying both female and male characters. But some industries, I'm familiar with kpop one so it's the best example, are objectifying both genders and the beauty standars are all going wild and toxic with face looks or the sexy body look. It's scary and very negative.
Ya, there's the popular version about the female gaze emphasizing femininity and what being "pretty" is. Then the one that's just not dressing for men, and instead wearing or appearing more or less neutral. Then the one that just sexualizes men instead of women and the one that you mentioned about KPop, which I think is just over sexualization. Could also be a nod to "purity culture"
viewing women from a place of human solidarity and friendship is the closest a man can get to female gaze, but it lacks the element of direct experience (being a woman) to inform the solidarity on a visceral level i came out as bi in middle school, so I've seen queer men when they were still boys, and they can definitely "play to" the male gaze (throw women/girls under the bus) to gain attention from misogynistic heterosexual men. maybe you could call that "secondhand" male gaze, but either way it objectifies the woman involved.
@@kerycktotebag8164 really? I’m gay and knew it since rather young. When I do look at girl it’s because she looks beautiful and that’s all, nothing more. I do not know how to phrase it to sound non offensive, but anything more it’s a unpleasant sight for me, sorry 😞
I think the problem is that people stigmatize the male gaze. There is a difference imo, between being toxic, and male gaze. Male gaze is simply the way men see the world, and women. I think toxic masculinity is when a man decides to use how he see the world and women, in a negative way, that harms others. Not only that, same thing for women, It is not a problem with how women see men or women, but when it causes them to act negatively, that is when it is a problem. Now what i mean by this, is that i believe there is a positive, and negative side to both gaze types. Like for instance, in positive male gaze, men will call you pretty, and leave, and negative, they probably will harass you. Idk, i think it is a bit hard trying to communicate what i think...but i think this is a good explanation of my opinion
I disagree, male gaze is objectifying, female gaze is personifying. Men are more unevolved, more animalistic, women are more angelic and mental. In my religion it is mens mission to fight their animal soul and be more intellectual and women naturally are closer to God. Most men objectify women like crazy rather than see them as friends or people. Whereas maost girls i know dont care if a guy is hot or physically attractive as long as he isnt ugly and has a good personality
@@kphoria1009 That us what i mean.. Like i was trying to explain a whole opinion in a few seconds. What im saying is that Male gaze, if used in a negative way like u said, i believe that would be toxic/negative masculinity
In my opinion, an easy distinction between the male and female gaze is one looks at the body not the clothes and the other looks at the clothes not so much the body
I know it's more complicated, but I thought male gaze meant men only seeing women for their physical appearance and the focus is for the man's pleasure. The female gaze is about viewing women as a 3-dimensional thinking feeling person. It's about her mind and talents she can show to the world. Also dressing in clothes that are comfortable for the women and not for male attention. Not just the exact opposite of the male gaze. By this way of thinking the female gaze is better. I'm just wondering how old are you? I just found your channel and your topics are interesting.
@@wrldvrapt6418 I don't know if there is a female gaze on men. Thats an interesting question. I just know the female gaze is not just the opposite of male gaze.
@@vibez2806 I believe there is a female gaze on men, but it might not be exactly the same as the purely physical admiring and wanting of women. I'm sure there's women out there that thirst after handsome men, but they might consider other good qualities in there thinking.
15:45 I think one of the greatest female rappers is little simz, if you want sth that challenges your way of thinking. English is not my first language so, I might have made a grammar mistake, but anyways, little simz is really good!
I think it’s really interesting that Yorgos Lanthinmos got nominated for best director for depicting a story about female pleasure and discovery in poor things. Yet, Greta Gerwig, a female director who told a story about the female experience was not given a nomination 🧐🧐
Sol Chyld is one of the only female rapper that isn’t sexualized, she’s immensely talented and extremely underrated (probably because she is more modest in the way she dresses) check her out.
My problem with the term male gaze is that it is often used as a derogatory term used to define something that is overtly sexual/sensual or just lacking in nuance and thought. Pandering to the lowest common denominator. This is why I'm always wary of feminist media because it has such a heavy handed bias against men. You made a point about the difficulty in defining a female gaze because it would be too broad or too narrow. It couldn't be too close to the male gaze because surely the female gaze is different and more understanding of a diverse selection of women. It's the same for men. By calling this "the male gaze" there is an artificial denigration of the male viewpoint. Male leads often have no character or substance either and are place holders for wish fulfillment. Like the shia leboeuf's character in transformers. He's not really interesting as a character he's just "the lead". But it isn't fair to say men only like sexual/sensual content. Many men like historical movies like Oppenheimer but no one would call that the male gaze. It's just a good movie. My point is that whenever male gaze is used to define media it used in a derogatory sense subconsciously making people think that men have low brow thinking in general and female gaze is more subtle and empowering because women are more" nuanced, sensitive and individual". The feminist scholar could have called this phenomena anything but why choose such a term? I don't think it was fair on her part or on general media's part to villianize a whole gender as male gaze centric purely on the basis of the presence of sensual content. P.s apologies for anyone who had to read this whole essay. I apologize if I wasted your time, but it was really beginning to bug me.
This is a great video and I loved every point you made but not all men, like myself, care about how you look until we put a ring on it or if we are together. You wear what you wear, I’ll wear what I wear but when it comes to us being together we need to look a certain way.
Tell them flatly you are disinterested and just walk away from them. Don’t be overly rude as it might set some crazy men off. If the guy is reeeaallyy persistent get loud and rowdy and don’t be afraid to do it ❤
And the way it’s a BIT harsher for women about beauty standards… I feel like it’s because society ingrains that into women’s heads when they’re young. I realized as a teen, (when I didn’t really have clothes to have the style I want so I thought I was ugly and my clothes an issue), the boys at my school were just able to dress the same as they did when they were kids or just comfortable and I was a little jealous of that since I got shamed for that or treated like I was weird. I think the media should talk about this more, because even in the modern ages there’s still a lot of lowkey misogyny from young teens and men in general… and this is just one example. 🤷♀️
There is no high beauty standard you could literally just hang around a guy and compliment him and have a 90 percent success rate in dating him even if you are slightly chubby it's an easy W
Women say this then completely ignore the height shaming done mostly by women against men which men have no control over and it affects how much they earn/promotions, literally just based on height alone
@@sjejsj7615 you’ve been replying on nearly half the comments under this vid. What point ru tryna prove?? That men’s beauty standards are worse??? This ain’t a competition. Both are equally bad and demeaning & I was stating my experience.
@@MJluvrr9220 I reply to anything that is objectively false, your comment included. You clearly made it a competition with the “it’s a BIT harsher for women about beauty standards”.
@@sjejsj7615 I said the beauty standards are a bit harsher BECAUSE of what is ingrained in women’s heads at a young age, speaking of internalized misogyny. As if this vid isn’t asking which one is worse… my comment wasn’t targeted towards you, buddy. 😂
Billie Eilish is a perfect example where you can clearly see that society is fundamentally broken. Why the hell were people asking a teen to dress "normal" when she already dressed normal? She just didn't show a lot of skin which I found admirable. And her style was great imo. But "normal", for a developing teen girl, would be to uncover more? That is beyond disturbing.
I don’t like that male gaze qualities are shamed cause if your hyperfeminine cause it’s automatically seen as not empowering or against female independence. It’s not . I find some iconic female characters are the ones who are feminine but are also independent like legally blonde. Don’t get me started on the “pick me” witch trials that happen among women. If your anything, you are put to trial.
When it’s all said and done, we need to acknowledge that, if indeed the male gaze theory is true, women have been participating in and supporting it. The notion that a male-centric industry caters to men using women in the process fails to go far enough to do justice to the complexity of the reality. In plain terms, if Halle Berry plays the role of James Bond girlfriend to Pierce Brosnan in “Die Another Day,” is it because she’s agreed to be objectified or is it because she’s been used against her will? With reference to this and other debates on gender biases, we must sort out responsibilities. Prostitution and procuring are two sides of a coin: but does the latter always exist in tandem with the former? Who is to blame? Is it the males who actively pursue the women to quench their lusts; or the females who have determined to use their sexual powers to earn a sometimes lavish living?
I think for the Euphoria thingy I think that the show was trying to make it unfiltered and the reality is that teen girls are sexualized especially in real life
@Idkwhatthisiz well I haven't rlly watched the show so I'm not the best say I just thought that might be a good explanation for why they showed it in the show
i wonder if most non‐binary ppl "learn" these gazes differently, or if it sinks into ppl based on sexuality (if you're attracted to women/fem ppl, it teaches you how to gaze a specific way regardless of gender), or both i guess your own gender and the gender(s) ur attracted to..?
I have a non-binary friend, and they say that they accidentally picked 2 or 3 stereotypes when the first came out. They say it’s somehow easier and more difficult to create yourself at the same time, because they chose from differing stereotypes, because any would work, but it’s hard to get out of the multiple learned gazes.
@@Thi-Seni relate. it's easier because i know that people can really only use direct physical manipulation to get me to "be a man" (i have no internal attachment to masculinity). -and i gotta give credit to braver lgbtq+ people (braver than me, i think) who paved the way for me. it's harder to anticipate how people might react to me, bc ***they*** can't rely on stereotypes to oversimplify my existence. well, they might think I'm a trans woman who refuses to shave (i don't know how they see me??), and they could stigmatize me in that way, but i don't fit into either of their two boxes, so even when they're mean to me, they're still reacting to my queerness. only really really cruel conservatives can get under my skin, if and only if they (1) see me as "failed" masculinity and (2) try to make me feel like less of an \adult\ bc of it. i rambled but hopefully that made sense. basically, the fact that people can't "pin me down" with stereotypes makes things easier sometimes and harder other times.
@@kerycktotebag8164 Yes, that sounds a lot like how my friend described how it is for them, too. I’m a trans man, but thankfully I had a good friend save me from the entire toxic masculinity pitfall. And it angers me how people try to put all queer people in a little box, but I understand that it comes from blatant hatred or fear. It’s easier for them to just say blanket statements about us and leave it at that, rather than to actually look within and realize that they’re being disrespectful, simply from a lack of understanding. It’s easier for them to bury it than to actually do some research. People always judge a book by its cover- more like, their interpretation of the book’s cover. Their loss, though, because they miss out on getting to know some really cool people. I grew up with super religious parents (they were straight up extremists), so I got numb to the constant barrage of insults and slurs thrown my way, but it’s the same with toxic people out in the world. There’s no convincing (I’ve tried), because they don’t want to learn or understand.
to return to the topic of the video, if anyone likes psychoanalysis (something the woman who coined "male gaze" studied), the male gaze is referred to as "fascinum" in French, and the female gaze is "fascinance", and English authors use those words too.
@@Thi-Seni feel similarly as what you expressed, about how society stereotypes me. so many of people's ideas about how to be a human & how to treat people (and relate to them) is tied up in gender stereotypes, so when your own existence makes ppl even \begin\ to wonder if they've been utilizing shallow stereotypes in their approach to ppl, they'd rather make queerness a bad thing so they don't have to admit to themselves that they could change their approach to ppl in general. that's my guess. They don't want to look back at all the people their lack of perspective has hurt, and how many experiences they cheapened with it.
Honestly women can wear what they want to wear...if a man wants to behave like a mad man then that's irrelevant of dressing. Same with lesbians.... irrelevant to the topic of the video tho
I find it interesting that some women, rappers, singers whoever... find it necessary to cater to the male gaze when their consumer base is mainly women. I mean, Billie ellish was successful for a reason. Same for Taylor swift
As a non-binary person who people tend to confuse as being either a woman or a man, I have been objectified, by men mostly. When they think I’m a woman they usually catcall me or attempt to say that I need to date them because I’m obligated to…? That always confuses me, I’ve hit people who go too far with a variety of items, my favourites being an electric guitar, a dictionary, and a skateboard. When I am seen as a man I usually get teased about being a ‘stud’, as an aroace person I can confidently say I am not a stud, however whilst I was hanging out with my friend who is a girl (also ironically the only friend of mine who is a girl), they thought we might have been doing certain stuff and gave me the protection thing for that stuff, the person next to them noticed I had a singular earring in my right ear and told the guy I was gay- and he told me to take it anyway so that I can stay safe and avoid getting AIDS, which whilst I appreciate the concern, I have zero use for that stuff… so I donated it to the free item box for specifically the item I was given by my local punk store. On the other hand a girl was trying to talk to me about something and I wanted her to leave me alone, she wouldn’t so I just sat and read my book, mostly ignoring her, but then she told me that “this is why I hate men- men never listen!” Which whilst I felt somewhat attacked ai also shrugged it off because I am not obligated to listen to a random person who will not leave me alone and let me read a book alone in a library in peace. Then another guy threatened me and said I had to date him or he’d get his whole gang together to do certain stuff and make me be his ‘hoe’, I told him I didn’t care and to leave me alone, he wouldn’t and I hit him with a nearby table made of stone. I have had zero problems with any gang, so I think he was bluffing, which I thought from the beginning but quite frankly even if he wasn’t bluffing whatever? Bro was gross.
As a fellow aroace person I feel you. Im a guy and my best friend is a lesbian but most people who only know me don't know that so one day my parents where like “are you and Lily dating/do you have a crush on her” and I just had to hit then with the she’s a Lesbian and Im aroace. Of course I don't “ Also maybe Im just lucky as a guy but I haven't actually ran into many issues with either gender. Which is also why I feel Im lucky being aroace cause holy crap this species’ dating scene is a mess. If you are a guy you have to pick up on cues and stuff for some reason nor can you be to pushy cause otherwise you come off as a creep but you can't be not pushy cause then they will feel like you dont want to date then apparently and I just don't wanna deal with all that stuff. Also people will apparently do TikTok tests to test your relationship if you are unlucky like no this ain't for me. I will be perfectly happy living with a roommate whose my best friend or living alone I don't need this drama in my life.
It's not though, why is it bad if your looks caught our attention, but who you are keeps us around? What's wrong with being physically attracted to someone???
@@molasorrosalom4846looks and a body part are two different things, her face didn’t matter to him. That is a way of thinking, rooted in porn. Take care.
I liked this video alot. It pointed out a lot of flaws in today's film industry. But in 18:23 there's a bit of a double standard. You say put the male gaze as a rigid and unchanging perspective. But when you describe the female gaze you say that it can't be simplified due to the vast amount of variety of experiences women live. I agree with that, but shouldn't that mean that there's also not a single male gaze? I can think of several great movies and books of the top of my head that where written by men, and yet have excellently written characters and where not overly sexualized and in some cases, not sexualized at all. Lord of The Rings, The Hobbit, Mundo Umbrio, How to Train your Dragon, the first movie of Pacific Rim, Godzilla 2014, Shin Gojira, etc etc. Its best to analize these things objectively. I'm not saying that the male gaze dosen't exist, but I don't think there's one male gaze, but rather, many.
I can explain the female gaze (the different one not the feminist version) cause tbh it does feel a bit hypocritical for me and I am a victim of this too. I have a guy friend who LIVES for the male gaze, I swear this guy has more hentai than music on his phone and all he comments on are about anime girls without ever watching the anime show itself. I always criticize him about this and actually beg him to stop blah blah blah. However, here I am on the other side talking about my own favorite male characters and their bodies and how hot they look and he has even called me out for this. I just feel like girls are just as guilty of this as boys are, HOWEVER, it's not viewed as a big deal and it's really.... not if you think about it. I saw this one youtuber who actually reviewed this and even said that when it comes to us seeing a guy without his shirt on, there's not shame in it, there's not emphasis on the guy who doesn't have his shirt on and it doesn't become his whole personality. On the other hand, you have women who's boobs are the first thing they show and how the men in the shows just keep looking at the boobs and even just a bikini shot is over emphasized and suddenly this character is just ALL about her body.
In my opinion, the worst gaze is the female one. Because the male gaze may be raw, but it's honest with the intentions. The female one is more degrading, because it's sneaky and makes you have more issues with your self esteem and makes your life uneccesarily more difficult than it already is. It gives you more baggage than what you already have.
Rubish the male gaze is more toxic as it is focused on a fantasy which is not doable at all. Unless you want to end up like Madonna with all the plastic surgery.
Yeah, it feels like it’s simplifying women. Like the amount hyperfeminine women are seen as not empowering. Only certain women are empowering. It’s the same issue I have with the fem fatale accused of anti feminist. Yes fem fatale women were used as devil fruit devices in the past but it opened opportunity for women to be sexual but owning it. You see this with Faye valentine or bayonetta. Very sexual but empowering. The problem I have with the female gaze is that it has this expectation that women have to perform certain way based on the trendiness of the general public. It’s not considerate how women are not a hive mind and women are different.
I'm a female who grew up watching barbie and I have own a few dolls, I think that men and women that don't like the movie because its about feminism and shows that a woman who is naturally dependent on a woman can actually do without when that is not true because there is limitations as to what women can do and men as well.
It's like it's been too long since I've watched films with hetero romance, where there would be a sexualization of women. Instead, I've been reading comics and stuff for a long time, where there are only men whose romantic stories are pretty well written and have good hot scenes. It doesn't have the money of a standard Hollywood movie, but should I worry about them releasing another movie so that a bunch of blockheads will give their money to watch the big bang against the background of a cool car with the main characters and a beauty under their arm
@@thatstockinglazed donuts are good but strawberry and cream donuts are even better. No that wasn't an innuendo. There is this donut shop in Georgia called Sublime Donuts and its has a Donut called the Strawberry and Cream donut. Its basically a donut topped with powered sugar cut open and filled with fresh cut strawberries and then filled with cream. It is the single handed best donut I've ever tried and will fight people on that.
Female gaze: Victoria Secret Male gaze : Por/n hub In conclusion both are wrong… but a lot of people are not ready for this conversation Another example Most beautiful woman in world Female gaze : Bella hadid Male gaze : Sidney Weeny FG: Anya Taylor MG: Ana de Armas
Happened to me I was 16 a guy won't stop bothering/following me to the point that I boarded a bus to the wrong direction and he followed me in the bus.. when i paid my fare it was clear that I'm not getting off and he didn't want to pay so he got off..
18:33 yeah, but the notion of a single male gaze also oversimplifies every man's experience and perspective, so why are people saying that all men objectify women? Why do people tend to overgeneralize what men experience but not what women experience? Also, when the Barbie movie came out, men decided to own the whole KENough thing because they didn't think it was right for women to be mocking men as a way to get back at men, so they decided to challenge that thinking through sarcasm/comedy.
I 100% agree with some other comments here mentioninf that sometimes if not most of the time, the female gaze is just as misogynistic as the male gaze and that. For a wonderful on-screen depiction of well written, diverse, nuanced female characters who are not over sexualised and are at the centre of all the action, watch the show 'Killing Eve'.
My only thing w the gazes is that if u have a low reaction (like a simple cool) if some1 asks u if the person is cute. People immediately slap you with a jealous label or weird Yesterday, I was otp w a male friend and he was like “ *DAMNNNN* ” He does this so much I literally know what just that reaction means. He shows me a instagram of a fit, muscular blonde girl. Callin her a bad b and what not. Dont get me wrong, she’s pretty. she really is but even as a hetero fem she just wouldn’t be someone I’d go crazy for. I like the dark ones ^^ (and im on the AA spectrum so that makes it really hard) but because I had this “negative” reaction he thought I was jealous which is weird because I never said that or hinted at that. And I get accused of being jealous a lot because someone had a big reaction At something and I’d just go “Nice-pretty-cool” because I do not care. But i dont want to pretend and seem snobbish (because im chub fem so its stereotypes and i have to watch what I say and do or id be labeled) its really hard fitting in w my age range w all this 😢
The female gaze is NOT hinged on any of this social justice warrior crap. It's solely about what traits women find ATTRACTIVE in man.. vs what men THINK women like ie. "Looking like Arnold Schwarzenegger"
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I understand, but in a way it’s attacking men. Which was the problem in the first place right?…. Attacking woman. And you made fun of men after saying men immaturely look at woman so isn’t that immature too making fun of men? Can we all get along :)
can yu link the hair
Keep in mind, Billie Eilish was only a minor when she blew up. I also remember creepy men counting the days til she turned 18 😬
A trend since forever :(
Also wasn’t there phots of her floating around in her tank top and everyone talking about her breasts. I remember seeing a photo taken, wasn’t she underaged? :/
..please tell me you’re kidding
Majority of her fans are women. You are looking at a minority of men.
Tf? Is that true?
The men in my office would always tell me “you’d look so much better with your hair down”. I would simply smile & reply that “my hair is not about you, you have a nice day.”
Exactly ❤🎉
“You think so? You’d look so much better with your mouth closed!”
@@des5305 precisely! He can shut it 😂😂😂
I told my coworker that he would look better without his beard. Was that something I shouldn't have done? It was an honest opinion.
No, you see, guys can take compliments or suggestions without getting upset.
I've had female co-workers telling me I look better with a shaved bald head, vs when I had hair.
I didn't complain about it or cry in a corner.
“I just feel like modesty is being shamed.” You’re a hundred percent right: modesty IS being shamed.
A man sexualization a women is wrong but when they do it them self is ok lol hypocrite
But it shouldn’t be.
Its a tricky question. People shame others for not having "modesty" but then shame modest ppl
@@HazZzel- it’s kind of a “damned if you do, damned if you don’t” situation. too many times i’ve seen girls advertising modest clothing be called “brainwashed”, but have girls who advertise less-modest clothing be called terrible names. it’s also about which audience receives your content (on socmed, ofc. i’ve never seen a real-life example of this but i’m sure i will sometime) because especially on socmed, a lot of people don’t realise that commenting on posts = being recommended the very things they hate. so the comments are almost always attracting the wrong enraged crowds
Yeah modesty is always shamed and seen as boring
I think we forget about Turning Red. The movie itself received a lot of criticism, but i think it's a perfect representation of our teenage years. Usually girls are forced to grow up, to take a lot of responsibility at a young age (specially for people of colour, i have experienced), to stop thinking about 'childish' things, while boys are given more freedom to enjoyed boyish things; why is it bad or cringe for a girl to like boybands, or fanfics or romance books? Why is it bad to let young girls be kids? I loved the movie bcuz i related to it so much, that was me when i was 11-14 years old, it felt so good to have that kind of representation on media.
Sorry if it doesn't make sense, english is not my main language.
Yeah people call every romantic thing for girls “wattpad” it’s kinda annoying
I will say it was a little too accurate at times. Like the way the girls acted had me rolling like, "nooooooo I did that!!" 🥲😬😳😳😳
I know right.. I almost always notice that society gets mad at women who are"Way too independent" not realizing that most girls before adult hood, are taught by their parents to be independent, to cook, to clean, to act a certain way, yet "a lot" of times, the boys are just raised to coexist, grow up, move out, and get a job. I know that both sides, women, and men, have their own problems. But when it does come to childhood, i notice that the girls are expected to live up to a certain lifestyle, and when they dont, their family is disappointed.
This!! As a Gen Z AFAB (Although I identify as bigender), I've always been expected to like certain things because my female peers liked it. I was expected to be this make-up obsessed Taylor Swift-listening that girl who dressed in all those aesthetic clothes you'd see on TikTok, when I'm like that at all. I'm a nerdy cutecore gamer who watches anime 24\7 and always has their nose on the books. But I'm always judged for liking what I like. My female classmates, while nice, would sort of infantilize me and not take me seriously most of the time. And my male classmates would straight up run away from me if I even dared to talk about video games with them. This happened in both my former and my current school. And my parents are heavily pressuring me to be like my classmates as well. I once cried because my mom baraded me for wanting to wear a Sonic hoodie instead of what my female classmates wore
@@melodi_bunniez I have had a similar experience to you in school. And i am telling you, that if they are making sly remarks about you, they weren't "nice"...but jealous. Most of the time when some girls hate you for liking what you like, and being how you are, it is because they want that for themselves, yet dont have it, so they degrade you for it.
Let's not forget Sam Levinson also directed (and ruined) The Idol, it shows where his head is
The main female actresses love him as a director tho.. why nobody talks when women back up pervs? They are just as bad as him
That one threw me for a loop.... I did not watch it, BUT I do know of the story behind the entire project & what it was originally & how it was deadaxx already like 80% shot just for these 2 DUSTY XYs to do what they did. I did NOT need to watch it & I STILL saw wayyyy too much with people breaking down the hot over filled landfill poisoning the atmosphere straight GARBAGE that they felt so righteously entitled/justified to "make better" 💀🤮
Yes highly disappointed
Im pretty sure the weekend made sam levinson reshoot most of the show for his own idea/gaze (could be pulling this out of my ass but i know I heard this somewhere)
Girl please do start being a director because the industry needs some milk chile
Not some milk😂😂🤣lol maybe on day I’ll direct something who knows 🤷🏾♀️😂
The “modesty gets shamed” part of the video is, in my personal experience, very real. I used to be deathly insecure about my body so I’d always go to school in sweatpants & a hoodie and people used to make these insane rumours about me being a “drug addict” all because I didn’t wear any form fitting clothes :/ I eventually started feeling insecure even while wearing baggy clothes
I’m sorry you had to go through that! But it’s just so weird because if you show skin you are going to b called “attention-seeking” then if you cover up people are going to ask why you’re doing that and make all sorts of rumours about you, it’s messed up!
Women complaining about men treating them horribly, is the same as women complaining about other women, for looking provocative and intimidating to men.
@NkirukasWrld I also feel that nudity isn't the issue its the sexulisation of bodies. It's the sexualisation of nudity. Eg. If breasts were less sexualised women would actually be able to be less modest and havw topless rights which would actually be better for women.
@@NkirukasWrldthis is where we need to learn to stop worrying about the judgment/what others think.
If you are ashamed of it, they will shame you for it.
@@user-bq2ko2tb2w You just missed the point
16:21 the “modesty gets shamed” is such an interesting topic, I have potential reasons to why that is!
1- it’s seen as a restriction
2- it’s seen as regressive and prudish
3- it’s seen as boring and uninteresting
@Barree1Religion, It’s a significant factor when it comes down to modesty because it’s associated with moralistic values that are ingrained into the the religion. Ex: A woman who covers herself up and doesn’t show her desirable traits is considered a woman with good qualities and morality, Opposite of that is considered immoral and lacking qualities even if the woman actually has good qualities. Cultural beliefs also play a role in modesty
That’s happened to me in the past… I hate it.
@@lalaland2107 There’s nothing wrong with wearing modest clothes, I would assume the peers around you think immodesty is ‘fun’ and ‘trendy’ so they’d pressure you and shame you for not being like them. It does suck to be othered by people for what seems to be a very trivial reason such as not wearing the same clothing.
I always found it ridiculous that modesty could ever be seen as a bad thing in any way. The only time it's bad is when it's forced or unreasonable. My personal stance is, as long as an individual is covered enough to not be indecent ( showing privates, butt cheeks, boobs, etc ), it doesn't matter. And that's because of taking into account the comfort levels of the people around you, which I think people should be considerate of.
Yes I got no attention when I dressed modestly
The worst thing about this topic it’s notice that even the perspective that we have upon ourselves it’s majority build on the male perspective, I remember being an adolescent and dress, eat, live wondering if I look attractive, even alone, judging myself for just being human
I agree... Yeah, sadly the patriarchal society has an influence on girl's and women's choices, so they compete based on looks, to get their "man prize" and have a good time with them.
I call it the voyeuristic man in your head, always worrying about whether you look good or not even when you're alone or doing something mundane.
@@shoobamocha as if it cant be a woman? I find it so weird that some women like you always find ways to hate on men lol. Like "oh? I got insecurity issues? Imma call it the shitty man in my head"
Girls have literally given me so many more insecurities than guys did. I know my own experience doesnt mean sh1t but still. Its unfair to put everything wrong in our personal lives on men when it isnt so
(Im going off topic now kinda but still fair warning) I was r worded when i was a kid for yearsss by 2 women who were maids in my house, and no one took it seriously enough like "its fine theyre women cant do much harm" its a weird way to think
We angelize women. Even on pinterest till this day i see women saying "i will always support amber (heard), shes a woman and girls support girls" and its so weird to me. In a hetero relationship if theres abuse by the man only hes the abuser but if the woman is the abuser then the man must have been one too
@@Jia-po2uf Oh boy. I meant that women see and judge themselves through the male gaze, which is often true. Women are not angelized, that's actually a joke and hints you're one of those guys who thinks women have it easy?... Women are always judged more harshly and face worse consequence socially and legally, I've noticed it my whole life. Male privilege is blatant, so blatant that they take it for granted. Don't pretend like men don't always give other men passes and the benefit of the doubt over the most horrible things. Amber Heard was treated abhorrently in all media when she was a victim of abuse, of course some people want to support her because it's a sympathetic experience that a lot of us relate to. I don't mean to trigger you about personal trauma, your experiences have nothing to do with what I said and it's a separate issue. But it seems like you, like other men, have a bone to pick and lash out at these discussions about bigger picture issues. There's no need to take it personally. And yes I will continue "hating" m3n and they will continue dehumanizing, torturing, and killing us as they have been forever.
@@Jia-po2uf the discussion was about the male gaze and its effects.....maybe you missed that part ??because yes for this specific problem ,it has been majorly caused and influenced by men and it definitely has caused insecurities for women all over . No shit she called the voice a man ...cos it literally stems from that gaze ???
no one blamed men for ALL of women's problems lmao ??where did anyone mention or even insinuate that ...
You're not forced to think of that voice as a man if it triggers this much anger in you lmao . Sorry about your unfortunate encounters with the women in your life , thats horrible and disgusting but it doesn't disprove this specific issue
The first movie that comes to my mind when I think about this topic is Lolita, a book about a perverse and creepy guy forcing his way into a child life, was transformed into a movie about a sexualized and matured adolescent that throws herself upon a poor adult man, trying desperately to make the audience believe that this could be love. It’s just terrifying to think how much manipulation Hollywood can do in the real life, without people noticing
Love Nabokov. The book is supposed to be a warning to society. The movie was exactly what he was warning society about
I love how the lolita FASHION is actually about modesty while still being cute and fashionable. The fashion movement is proof that being modest doesn’t mean being ugly.
That movie is from the 60s or 50s, move tf on!!!, plus the original concept was something a lot of people back in the day wouldn't understand because 17 yo girls used to be withbolder guys , Elvis was dating Priscilla when she was like 15 and he was 20 something, in those days it wasn't seen as creepy
@@kant.68just because it was normal back than doesn’t make it right
Female gaze can be worse sometimes...most women have so much internalised misogyny that they are constantly comparing themselves to other women. Women use less attractive women to boost thier ego's, the amount of times ive had women stare intensely at me and then smirk is disturbing, other people using your misfortune to get happiness is horrible. Ive had countless men stare at me and tell me im ugly which is obviously hurtful but there's something worse about someone gaining confidence using your misfortune
Damn that's crazy
Yeah, despite the fact that honesty can be painfull (coming from men), the pain is worse when you know, that you get manipulated as an unfortunate victim and then get isolated for it (coming from women).
Both sides are creepy, with the one being physical (male) and the other one being verbal (female).
That’s intrasexual competition, living organisms do this
@@zyyl1949Nope, that's internalised misogyny and it's more rampant, than you think.💀
These girlies and women, are dragging down each other, because all of them have been affected by the patriarchy and want to look good for the male gaze.
Similarly to how guys and men fight competitively against each other, for female attention.
We all are down bad.
@@zyyl1949 Nope that's toxic feminism and internalised misogyny.
Something that I noticed when I watched Barbie was the difference in outfits that Margot were in the begging and in the final. The yellow dress was so simple, soft and elegant showing a lot of the emotions of the characters, although all that I heard from people near me was how ugly was compared with others outfits, the moment were she was vulnerable and finding herself. Just something that I noticed. I loved the movie so much
that euphoria show, (as a girl who has v small boobs) destroyed my self esteem and gave so many young boys reason to harass and shame girls my age who didn’t have the “sydney” body. it’s literally triggering for me and we need to talk about how society grooms us girls less attractive, to hate those that are. and then we get called “haters” and “sensitive” when we were groomed to feel this envy and hate. so sad
Just know that you are not alone. Even women face not just misogyny by men, but also internalised misogyny by other random women.
Society is just more horrible to you, if you are a female person, instead of male.
I had the opposite experience bc of Maddy she was so attractive and pretty and womanly even tho she had a/b cups like me
@@missstranger7697I agree
I have really small bobbs (basically none at all) and I watched that show with my boyfriend 🙃
@@Lexi0626 😳💀
Its interesting that as a grown woman I've subconsciously learned how to dress and behave to get male attention and it really starts from back when you're a teen you do it without realizing that you're becoming a prisoner of a male gaze and your identity is reduced to being an object of satisfaction. I know that media and cinema plays a huge part in defining gender roles but really it starts from your parents, your siblings your peers and the just the society as a whole regardless of your geographical location it usually boils down to the exact same thing female objectification that we exist purely for the function of male objectification that includes child rearing, house chores and of course looking the fucking part while doing all of that modern woman has to also chip in with the bills its truly a mans world no matter where you are in the world and what you do they "men" aka the world doesn't care about what you want . I'm into filmmaking and story telling and for years I felt so inferior and so small I felt my story didn't matter in the grand scheme of things in other words "male" world and their perspective but f*ck them all (not all lol I'm sure they are good guys out there) I think unless a lot of female story tellers come into the scene and start telling their story and their perspective we'll all just be left in the mud, I believe cinema and media has a power to change perspective , I really believe that now that I'm a bit older and wiser. And Greta's work has been amazing I've watched most of her films except Barbie I know ironic, but I really wish more female storytellers would be courageous enough to fight for their voice.
Well yes because you ladies expect us to make the first move. Of course we are going to be influenced by how you look because we don't have any other information about you.
@@Sagefrakrobatik i think you missed the point
@@Navaniity using phrases like "prisoner of male gaze" "reduced to objects of satisfaction" seam a bit hyperbolic.
In general, men and women want someone they are physically attracted to
@@Sagefrakrobatiksexual attraction is not the same as objectification.
@@Navaniity there was a lot written perhaps you can summarize it for me?
Wow the way you explained the skirt scene👏🏼 the male gaze version seems like it wasn’t intended for the (entire) audience to feel the fear and discomfort for her character. The only thing the male audience will take away is how attractive she is by making her purposely look extra sexy as she gets pressured into it - thanks for talking about this! Love your videos🫶🏼
As a man I def understand you and her takes on the seen and I even like what she suggested they could have done instead, tho I disagree on the effect the scene had on men. I personally felt immediate fear, discomfort, and even disgust as I see the female character that just wants to be respected made to do such things. I feel a mans need and want to protect takes forefront of the mind in a scene like that instead of just going "now that's one hot lady." But I also understand that scene could be very triggering to watch for anyone that's been in a situation like that before.
@@Youngenius83i have to disagree with you on this, some men do feel protectiveness but a lot of men admitted that they just find that scene hot
Does anyone else feel like the phrase “men are visual creatures” is similar to the phrase “boys will be boys” in that they both excuse males for acting immature and gross?
Not even close to the same, there are scientific studies on this, it's proven to be within Men's psychology in much greater levels compared to Women who are more likely to need a connection first for their desire to turn into attraction. With that said immaturity and being gross isn't exclusive to anyone, the Men you're talking about just have no self control.
@@marcomarin1196 yes but the way the phrase is used, is the same.
this is why I loveee Studio ghibli movies: so many of them have a strong female characters !!
They're Spiritual Heroes not "JUST" Strong Female characters 😍🥺
can u plz make a video on straight men being uncomfortable around gay men because they think theyre hitting on them the way they hit on women? and how simultaneously they secretly hookup with each other and do sexual hinting things that are deemed as platonic but could be a contribution to being closeted and fragile masculinity?
That’s very specific 😂 Got some stories? I always feel uncomfortable around gay men because majority that I’ve met act feminine and I’m not used to it. Like I don’t avoid anyone but, it is weird. I don’t think I can have one in my close friend group because they’d definitely feel out of place. I feel like not being around that environment also contributes. I have no gay friends that are men. I feel they hang out with women more, like the women troupe of always having a gay best friend. I don’t doubt there are masculine gay men, I just haven’t met one.
@@paulbrown9328you’ve never met a masc gay dude before?? Lmaooo
You want to talk about it bc you dislike hetero men so much 😂
@@KingKissan No I haven’t why is that surprising? I’ve actually only met one gay man. They are minority on top of that I’m not gay, i am an introvert, and they usually don’t roll in my hobbies to my knowledge at least.
What
The quality of your video essays keeps getting better and better! You’re a natural at this!
GIRLLLL, I am so happy I saw this vid because this conversation is what I needed! Please continue the video beyond Hollywood! I am very tired of the oversexualization & sad how it’ll effect younger kids at an early age :/
I always think.. imagine we were only balls of light all looking the same but had our personalities…would the popular ppl now still be popular? It’ll really be based on ur character so the focus needs to be learning self validation before the external. It’s hard to unlearn cuz I’m doing it now but never to late to start ✨✨✨🎉
This is super interesting and worth discussing. This reminds me of the Bechdel test. The test asks whether a work features at least two female characters who have a conversation about something other than a man. I wonder if movies with the female gaze have ever passed this test
As a young woman who grew up right outside D.C and went in and out of it all the time, you honestly can't look anyone in the eye or talk to someone even if it's a "hello" because it's seen as an open invitation to start harassing you. I used to be friendly to people trying to talk to me on the street and it was okay for a while, but it became a problem the more I aged up and became pretty.
So, no matter who passes me (because you can be harassed by anyone) I will first scan in front of me to see what's going on, and then I'll look straight ahead as I pass a person. I will also watch the walls of buildings or fences to look out for shadows/people behind me. I also wear sunglasses a lot and I do NOT listen to music so I can be alert of my surroundings. I have bypassed hundreds of bad situations by doing those things since hitting puberty. Is that sad? Absolutely, but I just can't trust strangers to act appropriately.
And I must add that it didn't matter how I dressed either regarding walking around D.C and the surrounding big cities of D,C, so the argument of wearing baggy clothes doesn't always work, but it sometimes can depending on the creep. Funnily enough, what does get people to turn away or cross the street are my Wicked Clothes shirts with demons on them 😂
Hate to say it, but if you're attractive and still looking like a slob, you're still gonna get hit on by the male species.
We're just wired that way.
The demons will do it, happened with Doja😂 I'm so sorry that you have to constantly be aware, it is a fudged up society, but the way you dress %100 has nothing to do with it. I do recommend some safety precautions, like a weapon or something small and handy, in case for harassment
@@doobydool I actually like the demon look Doja Cat is going for 😆 But I love the metal, punk, and rock vibe and Halloween aesthetic, so I am biased.
I have a taser and pepper spray in my bag at all times. It definitely makes me feel better out alone even in crowded spaces.
As a swiss woman it's very confusing to hear about the huge problems women have in the US
They're over exaggerating, and there is one way to not be sexualized, you can always gain fifty lbs.
I would love to see another vid about the male vs female gaze,that would be really interesting.Love your videos ❤
Thank you!! I’m really interested in this topic and it applies to so much areas of our life so I definitely see myself making another video on it and expanding it beyond Hollywood! Thanks for watching!!🙏🏾💕
The first Harley Quin outfits are EXACTLY the same as in the comic books..he did a great job!
Side note: YOU LOOK AMAZING IN THAT DRESS YOU’RE SO PRETTY
Excellent work, NK. Yes, be an director! And yes to more on the male/female gaze. Love & respect from London UK 💙
I loved that u showed ur personality girl it’s lovely 🥰
Aw thank you your so sweet 🥰🥰🥹🥹🥹🥹I will do my best lol ! Lemme stop being shy
ahh i love watching your videos so much nk!! not only is your voice suuuper soothing, but you explain stuff so well, while also keeping things interesting. never stop making videos 🥹🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾
This is the sweetest comment ever omgg🥹🥹thank you so muchhhh!! It’s funny you say that about my voice because I used to get made fun of for having a “low” voice 😂 jokes on them I guess🤣but thank you truly I’m very glad you enjoyed this video!!💕💕
I think us women need to reject internally the concept of attracting or wanting anything to do with bad boys or alpha males by being shy or cool or wild or whatever i think thats when we will trully shine and be our true self :)
I hope we will stop caring so much what other people think of us, whether men or women. I don’t need to join a “movement”; I just need to let go of the pressure to please other people with my appearance and choose to focus on my own goals. It helps to have the support and approval of people around you, but you don’t NEED it.
The phrase “boys will be boys” (though obnoxious to many of us) is true: we don’t have the power to change the male gaze, because men are less susceptible to societal pressure than women tend to be. Social independence (aka doing what you want no matter what others think) has historically been more valued by men than by women.
The answer is not to try harder to control men; the answer is to set ourselves free and stop letting other people’s opinions dictate our choices.
Men are more pressured then women in many ways. We can't show emotion, we can't open up, we can't be victims apparently. The list goes on and on.
Omg yes. yes! Women should empower themselves to be the future they're trying to build. It's all about initiative 👏.
Despite the phrase "boys will be boys" I have also heard that men and women can't be friends.
In reality, I had a male childhood friend when I was in school for many years. So basically I broke one stereotype that tends to be said about boys and girls relationship lol.
The thing is.. if you want to just be, as a woman.... you automatically become a part of the movement
this “social independence” you speak of is only possible because men are allowed to do what they want and still be treated with decency. we don’t live in a vacuum, how other people view you has an affect on your life. the male gaze is what causes a lot of women to be sexually harassed and assaulted. “stop caring so much about what other people think” is not a solution
I think we need more women directors in Hollywood. I was so shocked when my aunt told me she didn't like the 'Barbie' movie and found it stranger that my younger cousin who is male liked it, but yeah to each their own.
The movie was booooring
The movie annoyingly skimmed through surface level feminism, felt ridiculously demeaning to me. Just a silly monologue and BAM!! That's it....
I absolutely love how your videos are so well-researched, and your opinions are clearly and effectively expressed.
We all know about that disgusting, pedofile like male gaze, honestly I think it was made through time by subjective wishes of male directors and writers. AS FOR FEMALE GAZE, there are many different versions, depending on what we are discussing about. There is the one about abs and handsome face over talent, which some actors suffered yet gained popularity for it. It's also shifting trough time, in some cases I think it goes into a much healthier direction with portraying both female and male characters. But some industries, I'm familiar with kpop one so it's the best example, are objectifying both genders and the beauty standars are all going wild and toxic with face looks or the sexy body look. It's scary and very negative.
That makes no sense
Ya, there's the popular version about the female gaze emphasizing femininity and what being "pretty" is. Then the one that's just not dressing for men, and instead wearing or appearing more or less neutral. Then the one that just sexualizes men instead of women and the one that you mentioned about KPop, which I think is just over sexualization. Could also be a nod to "purity culture"
@@sjejsj7615 Look at what doobydool commented and it will make more sense to you.
@@doobydool omg yes oversexualisation is kpop needs to STOP for both genders. Its disgusting, especially with minors
I wonder if a gay guy looking at a woman is considered male or female gaze? You look stunning with your hair to the side and that yellow dress.
viewing women from a place of human solidarity and friendship is the closest a man can get to female gaze, but it lacks the element of direct experience (being a woman) to inform the solidarity on a visceral level
i came out as bi in middle school, so I've seen queer men when they were still boys, and they can definitely "play to" the male gaze (throw women/girls under the bus) to gain attention from misogynistic heterosexual men.
maybe you could call that "secondhand" male gaze, but either way it objectifies the woman involved.
@@kerycktotebag8164 really? I’m gay and knew it since rather young. When I do look at girl it’s because she looks beautiful and that’s all, nothing more. I do not know how to phrase it to sound non offensive, but anything more it’s a unpleasant sight for me, sorry 😞
The gay male gaze?
you literally speak my mind. i cant say nothing but I LOVE YOU
You need to make a podcast!! I’m obsessed with your vids lmao
Your videos are very interesting and well made. We appreciate your work and content
I think the problem is that people stigmatize the male gaze. There is a difference imo, between being toxic, and male gaze. Male gaze is simply the way men see the world, and women. I think toxic masculinity is when a man decides to use how he see the world and women, in a negative way, that harms others. Not only that, same thing for women, It is not a problem with how women see men or women, but when it causes them to act negatively, that is when it is a problem. Now what i mean by this, is that i believe there is a positive, and negative side to both gaze types. Like for instance, in positive male gaze, men will call you pretty, and leave, and negative, they probably will harass you. Idk, i think it is a bit hard trying to communicate what i think...but i think this is a good explanation of my opinion
Honestly both gazes just help their own gender have a variety of attractive traits.
I disagree, male gaze is objectifying, female gaze is personifying. Men are more unevolved, more animalistic, women are more angelic and mental. In my religion it is mens mission to fight their animal soul and be more intellectual and women naturally are closer to God. Most men objectify women like crazy rather than see them as friends or people. Whereas maost girls i know dont care if a guy is hot or physically attractive as long as he isnt ugly and has a good personality
but the point is that the male gaze relies on objectification. thinking someone is pretty is not objectifying them, but staring at their boobs is
@@kphoria1009 That us what i mean.. Like i was trying to explain a whole opinion in a few seconds. What im saying is that Male gaze, if used in a negative way like u said, i believe that would be toxic/negative masculinity
@@KittenzHoarder there is no “positive” male gaze, as i said, the male gaze relies on objectification. nobody wants to be objectified.
In my opinion, an easy distinction between the male and female gaze is one looks at the body not the clothes and the other looks at the clothes not so much the body
So the female gaze, is basically not objectifying women
I know it's more complicated, but I thought male gaze meant men only seeing women for their physical appearance and the focus is for the man's pleasure. The female gaze is about viewing women as a 3-dimensional thinking feeling person. It's about her mind and talents she can show to the world. Also dressing in clothes that are comfortable for the women and not for male attention. Not just the exact opposite of the male gaze. By this way of thinking the female gaze is better. I'm just wondering how old are you? I just found your channel and your topics are interesting.
That's stupid. What about the female gaze on men??
@@wrldvrapt6418 I don't know if there is a female gaze on men. Thats an interesting question. I just know the female gaze is not just the opposite of male gaze.
@@Ginza92the female gaze is whatever you make it out to be it’s all a theory it’s not a set in stone definitive thing
@@Ginza92if there is a male gaze on women why would there not be a female gaze on men??
@@vibez2806 I believe there is a female gaze on men, but it might not be exactly the same as the purely physical admiring and wanting of women.
I'm sure there's women out there that thirst after handsome men, but they might consider other good qualities in there thinking.
33:28 your personality is one of my fav things about you! Please keep shining👑✨
15:45 I think one of the greatest female rappers is little simz, if you want sth that challenges your way of thinking. English is not my first language so, I might have made a grammar mistake, but anyways, little simz is really good!
I think it’s really interesting that Yorgos Lanthinmos got nominated for best director for depicting a story about female pleasure and discovery in poor things. Yet, Greta Gerwig, a female director who told a story about the female experience was not given a nomination 🧐🧐
Just got hooked to your channel
Well Margot Robbie was elected for the Oscar actually, for the production category
i got clowned in yr 5 for wearin bras by girls in my year. hated bein a "big tiddy girl" since.
Don't worry about it those girls were probably jeles and if they weren't there option is not worth our time
Sol Chyld is one of the only female rapper that isn’t sexualized, she’s immensely talented and extremely underrated (probably because she is more modest in the way she dresses) check her out.
I always wear flats…. To escape.
You can hardly escape though.
I thought you had atleast a 100k, your videos are so good ❤
My problem with the term male gaze is that it is often used as a derogatory term used to define something that is overtly sexual/sensual or just lacking in nuance and thought. Pandering to the lowest common denominator. This is why I'm always wary of feminist media because it has such a heavy handed bias against men. You made a point about the difficulty in defining a female gaze because it would be too broad or too narrow. It couldn't be too close to the male gaze because surely the female gaze is different and more understanding of a diverse selection of women. It's the same for men. By calling this "the male gaze" there is an artificial denigration of the male viewpoint. Male leads often have no character or substance either and are place holders for wish fulfillment. Like the shia leboeuf's character in transformers. He's not really interesting as a character he's just "the lead". But it isn't fair to say men only like sexual/sensual content. Many men like historical movies like Oppenheimer but no one would call that the male gaze. It's just a good movie. My point is that whenever male gaze is used to define media it used in a derogatory sense subconsciously making people think that men have low brow thinking in general and female gaze is more subtle and empowering because women are more" nuanced, sensitive and individual". The feminist scholar could have called this phenomena anything but why choose such a term?
I don't think it was fair on her part or on general media's part to villianize a whole gender as male gaze centric purely on the basis of the presence of sensual content.
P.s apologies for anyone who had to read this whole essay. I apologize if I wasted your time, but it was really beginning to bug me.
This is a great video and I loved every point you made but not all men, like myself, care about how you look until we put a ring on it or if we are together. You wear what you wear, I’ll wear what I wear but when it comes to us being together we need to look a certain way.
Anyone knows how to answer or how to react when a boy approaches you & won't go away no matter how kindly you tell?
I need some advice as a girl 😢😢
Tell them flatly you are disinterested and just walk away from them. Don’t be overly rude as it might set some crazy men off. If the guy is reeeaallyy persistent get loud and rowdy and don’t be afraid to do it ❤
Just know that many women have similar experiences with you.
My girlfriend gives guys fake numbers.
And the way it’s a BIT harsher for women about beauty standards… I feel like it’s because society ingrains that into women’s heads when they’re young. I realized as a teen, (when I didn’t really have clothes to have the style I want so I thought I was ugly and my clothes an issue), the boys at my school were just able to dress the same as they did when they were kids or just comfortable and I was a little jealous of that since I got shamed for that or treated like I was weird. I think the media should talk about this more, because even in the modern ages there’s still a lot of lowkey misogyny from young teens and men in general… and this is just one example. 🤷♀️
There is no high beauty standard you could literally just hang around a guy and compliment him and have a 90 percent success rate in dating him even if you are slightly chubby it's an easy W
Women say this then completely ignore the height shaming done mostly by women against men which men have no control over and it affects how much they earn/promotions, literally just based on height alone
@@sjejsj7615 you’ve been replying on nearly half the comments under this vid. What point ru tryna prove?? That men’s beauty standards are worse??? This ain’t a competition. Both are equally bad and demeaning & I was stating my experience.
@@MJluvrr9220 I reply to anything that is objectively false, your comment included. You clearly made it a competition with the “it’s a BIT harsher for women about beauty standards”.
@@sjejsj7615 I said the beauty standards are a bit harsher BECAUSE of what is ingrained in women’s heads at a young age, speaking of internalized misogyny. As if this vid isn’t asking which one is worse… my comment wasn’t targeted towards you, buddy. 😂
In kenya it's worse. They throw nasty words at you and even grope you without consent
Billie Eilish is a perfect example where you can clearly see that society is fundamentally broken. Why the hell were people asking a teen to dress "normal" when she already dressed normal? She just didn't show a lot of skin which I found admirable. And her style was great imo. But "normal", for a developing teen girl, would be to uncover more? That is beyond disturbing.
O.M.G you should totally watch Run, Sweetheart, Run!!! It is like THE Female Gaze movie.
I don’t like that male gaze qualities are shamed cause if your hyperfeminine cause it’s automatically seen as not empowering or against female independence. It’s not . I find some iconic female characters are the ones who are feminine but are also independent like legally blonde.
Don’t get me started on the “pick me” witch trials that happen among women. If your anything, you are put to trial.
Make a video on how modesty gets shamed though. Needs to go viral
The make gaze needs to be controlled. Its getting out of hand.
Controled? How?
Male gaze
@@missstranger7697How many many men sexualise underage girls
When it’s all said and done, we need to acknowledge that, if indeed the male gaze theory is true, women have been participating in and supporting it. The notion that a male-centric industry caters to men using women in the process fails to go far enough to do justice to the complexity of the reality. In plain terms, if Halle Berry plays the role of James Bond girlfriend to Pierce Brosnan in “Die Another Day,” is it because she’s agreed to be objectified or is it because she’s been used against her will?
With reference to this and other debates on gender biases, we must sort out responsibilities. Prostitution and procuring are two sides of a coin: but does the latter always exist in tandem with the former? Who is to blame? Is it the males who actively pursue the women to quench their lusts; or the females who have determined to use their sexual powers to earn a sometimes lavish living?
I think for the Euphoria thingy I think that the show was trying to make it unfiltered and the reality is that teen girls are sexualized especially in real life
Not really they’ve never addressed this and if they were to then it wouldn’t be done in this way and there’s really no need for it in the show
@Idkwhatthisiz well I haven't rlly watched the show so I'm not the best say I just thought that might be a good explanation for why they showed it in the show
The content you bring is fascinating. Congrats and thank you for this channel 😊💖
i wonder if most non‐binary ppl "learn" these gazes differently, or if it sinks into ppl based on sexuality (if you're attracted to women/fem ppl, it teaches you how to gaze a specific way regardless of gender), or both i guess your own gender and the gender(s) ur attracted to..?
I have a non-binary friend, and they say that they accidentally picked 2 or 3 stereotypes when the first came out. They say it’s somehow easier and more difficult to create yourself at the same time, because they chose from differing stereotypes, because any would work, but it’s hard to get out of the multiple learned gazes.
@@Thi-Seni relate.
it's easier because i know that people can really only use direct physical manipulation to get me to "be a man" (i have no internal attachment to masculinity).
-and i gotta give credit to braver lgbtq+ people (braver than me, i think) who paved the way for me.
it's harder to anticipate how people might react to me, bc ***they*** can't rely on stereotypes to oversimplify my existence.
well, they might think I'm a trans woman who refuses to shave (i don't know how they see me??), and they could stigmatize me in that way, but i don't fit into either of their two boxes, so even when they're mean to me, they're still reacting to my queerness.
only really really cruel conservatives can get under my skin, if and only if they (1) see me as "failed" masculinity and (2) try to make me feel like less of an \adult\ bc of it.
i rambled but hopefully that made sense.
basically, the fact that people can't "pin me down" with stereotypes makes things easier sometimes and harder other times.
@@kerycktotebag8164 Yes, that sounds a lot like how my friend described how it is for them, too. I’m a trans man, but thankfully I had a good friend save me from the entire toxic masculinity pitfall. And it angers me how people try to put all queer people in a little box, but I understand that it comes from blatant hatred or fear. It’s easier for them to just say blanket statements about us and leave it at that, rather than to actually look within and realize that they’re being disrespectful, simply from a lack of understanding. It’s easier for them to bury it than to actually do some research. People always judge a book by its cover- more like, their interpretation of the book’s cover. Their loss, though, because they miss out on getting to know some really cool people. I grew up with super religious parents (they were straight up extremists), so I got numb to the constant barrage of insults and slurs thrown my way, but it’s the same with toxic people out in the world. There’s no convincing (I’ve tried), because they don’t want to learn or understand.
to return to the topic of the video,
if anyone likes psychoanalysis (something the woman who coined "male gaze" studied), the male gaze is referred to as "fascinum" in French, and the female gaze is "fascinance", and English authors use those words too.
@@Thi-Seni feel similarly as what you expressed, about how society stereotypes me.
so many of people's ideas about how to be a human & how to treat people (and relate to them) is tied up in gender stereotypes, so when your own existence makes ppl even \begin\ to wonder if they've been utilizing shallow stereotypes in their approach to ppl, they'd rather make queerness a bad thing so they don't have to admit to themselves that they could change their approach to ppl in general.
that's my guess. They don't want to look back at all the people their lack of perspective has hurt, and how many experiences they cheapened with it.
I started watching your videos last week, and I feel like we are besties while watching your vids ! Keep going love💖
WOMAN = one
WOMEN = two or more; a group of🤗
Honestly women can wear what they want to wear...if a man wants to behave like a mad man then that's irrelevant of dressing. Same with lesbians.... irrelevant to the topic of the video tho
you look so pretty!
Not the Tia Tamera's 😂😂😂😂😂
That was smoothly inserted.
You look so beautiful in that dress!! 🥺
I find it interesting that some women, rappers, singers whoever... find it necessary to cater to the male gaze when their consumer base is mainly women. I mean, Billie ellish was successful for a reason. Same for Taylor swift
I don't believe so. I think their audiences are mostly men
THAT “WELL KEEP IT SIMPLE MEME WAS AMBER SCHOLL
Little Simz is a very talented rapper and I´ve never seen her butt. but sadly not as popular as ice spice etc.
Males love a diverse range of women regardless of skin color bodysize etc
As a non-binary person who people tend to confuse as being either a woman or a man, I have been objectified, by men mostly. When they think I’m a woman they usually catcall me or attempt to say that I need to date them because I’m obligated to…? That always confuses me, I’ve hit people who go too far with a variety of items, my favourites being an electric guitar, a dictionary, and a skateboard. When I am seen as a man I usually get teased about being a ‘stud’, as an aroace person I can confidently say I am not a stud, however whilst I was hanging out with my friend who is a girl (also ironically the only friend of mine who is a girl), they thought we might have been doing certain stuff and gave me the protection thing for that stuff, the person next to them noticed I had a singular earring in my right ear and told the guy I was gay- and he told me to take it anyway so that I can stay safe and avoid getting AIDS, which whilst I appreciate the concern, I have zero use for that stuff… so I donated it to the free item box for specifically the item I was given by my local punk store. On the other hand a girl was trying to talk to me about something and I wanted her to leave me alone, she wouldn’t so I just sat and read my book, mostly ignoring her, but then she told me that “this is why I hate men- men never listen!” Which whilst I felt somewhat attacked ai also shrugged it off because I am not obligated to listen to a random person who will not leave me alone and let me read a book alone in a library in peace. Then another guy threatened me and said I had to date him or he’d get his whole gang together to do certain stuff and make me be his ‘hoe’, I told him I didn’t care and to leave me alone, he wouldn’t and I hit him with a nearby table made of stone. I have had zero problems with any gang, so I think he was bluffing, which I thought from the beginning but quite frankly even if he wasn’t bluffing whatever? Bro was gross.
Idk if u know what a stud means nowadays lol
As a fellow aroace person I feel you. Im a guy and my best friend is a lesbian but most people who only know me don't know that so one day my parents where like “are you and Lily dating/do you have a crush on her” and I just had to hit then with the she’s a Lesbian and Im aroace. Of course I don't “
Also maybe Im just lucky as a guy but I haven't actually ran into many issues with either gender. Which is also why I feel Im lucky being aroace cause holy crap this species’ dating scene is a mess. If you are a guy you have to pick up on cues and stuff for some reason nor can you be to pushy cause otherwise you come off as a creep but you can't be not pushy cause then they will feel like you dont want to date then apparently and I just don't wanna deal with all that stuff. Also people will apparently do TikTok tests to test your relationship if you are unlucky like no this ain't for me. I will be perfectly happy living with a roommate whose my best friend or living alone I don't need this drama in my life.
Flashback to when i asked my then bf (now ex thank god) What made you want to ask me out? And his response was "Your boobs"
Okay??? It's called biology, it's how we're wired.
Looks may catch our attention, but who you are is what keeps us around.
@@molasorrosalom4846 it’s not wired it’s called corn addiction
It's not though, why is it bad if your looks caught our attention, but who you are keeps us around?
What's wrong with being physically attracted to someone???
@@JuniperGal-ek2puhow is that porn addiction? Sure it’s a little strange but he just found that feature attractive.
@@molasorrosalom4846looks and a body part are two different things, her face didn’t matter to him. That is a way of thinking, rooted in porn. Take care.
I liked this video alot. It pointed out a lot of flaws in today's film industry. But in 18:23 there's a bit of a double standard. You say put the male gaze as a rigid and unchanging perspective. But when you describe the female gaze you say that it can't be simplified due to the vast amount of variety of experiences women live. I agree with that, but shouldn't that mean that there's also not a single male gaze? I can think of several great movies and books of the top of my head that where written by men, and yet have excellently written characters and where not overly sexualized and in some cases, not sexualized at all. Lord of The Rings, The Hobbit, Mundo Umbrio, How to Train your Dragon, the first movie of Pacific Rim, Godzilla 2014, Shin Gojira, etc etc. Its best to analize these things objectively. I'm not saying that the male gaze dosen't exist, but I don't think there's one male gaze, but rather, many.
Thank you! I agree with this.
I wonder if Hayao Miyazaki films would fall under ‘female gaze’ films
I can explain the female gaze (the different one not the feminist version) cause tbh it does feel a bit hypocritical for me and I am a victim of this too. I have a guy friend who LIVES for the male gaze, I swear this guy has more hentai than music on his phone and all he comments on are about anime girls without ever watching the anime show itself. I always criticize him about this and actually beg him to stop blah blah blah. However, here I am on the other side talking about my own favorite male characters and their bodies and how hot they look and he has even called me out for this. I just feel like girls are just as guilty of this as boys are, HOWEVER, it's not viewed as a big deal and it's really.... not if you think about it. I saw this one youtuber who actually reviewed this and even said that when it comes to us seeing a guy without his shirt on, there's not shame in it, there's not emphasis on the guy who doesn't have his shirt on and it doesn't become his whole personality. On the other hand, you have women who's boobs are the first thing they show and how the men in the shows just keep looking at the boobs and even just a bikini shot is over emphasized and suddenly this character is just ALL about her body.
In my opinion, the worst gaze is the female one. Because the male gaze may be raw, but it's honest with the intentions.
The female one is more degrading, because it's sneaky and makes you have more issues with your self esteem and makes your life uneccesarily more difficult than it already is. It gives you more baggage than what you already have.
you know, i didn’t see it like that and you put it in good explanation. wow. just wow. you’re right!
The male gaze and female gaze are both healthy and we need more of it
Rubish the male gaze is more toxic as it is focused on a fantasy which is not doable at all.
Unless you want to end up like Madonna with all the plastic surgery.
@@sjejsj7615 You basically saying, men are so simple, not like the complicated sexual beings we call women.
Yeah, it feels like it’s simplifying women. Like the amount hyperfeminine women are seen as not empowering. Only certain women are empowering. It’s the same issue I have with the fem fatale accused of anti feminist. Yes fem fatale women were used as devil fruit devices in the past but it opened opportunity for women to be sexual but owning it. You see this with Faye valentine or bayonetta. Very sexual but empowering.
The problem I have with the female gaze is that it has this expectation that women have to perform certain way based on the trendiness of the general public. It’s not considerate how women are not a hive mind and women are different.
I'm a female who grew up watching barbie and I have own a few dolls, I think that men and women that don't like the movie because its about feminism and shows that a woman who is naturally dependent on a woman can actually do without when that is not true because there is limitations as to what women can do and men as well.
you should listen to the song called (forever by sa-roc). its so amazing and deserves so much more hype unbelievable how she went off
My female gaze is screaming „get naked!“ whenever Lucius Malfoy was on the screen!
NK you should definitely make a video about the shame attributed with modesty!!!!
It's like it's been too long since I've watched films with hetero romance, where there would be a sexualization of women. Instead, I've been reading comics and stuff for a long time, where there are only men whose romantic stories are pretty well written and have good hot scenes. It doesn't have the money of a standard Hollywood movie, but should I worry about them releasing another movie so that a bunch of blockheads will give their money to watch the big bang against the background of a cool car with the main characters and a beauty under their arm
I love your videos! Thank you so much for your hard work. Looking forward to your next videos :)
Lets talk about the donut glaze. Bahahahaha see what i did there??
ngl glazed donuts are high-tier
@@thatstockinglazed donuts are good but strawberry and cream donuts are even better.
No that wasn't an innuendo. There is this donut shop in Georgia called Sublime Donuts and its has a Donut called the Strawberry and Cream donut. Its basically a donut topped with powered sugar cut open and filled with fresh cut strawberries and then filled with cream. It is the single handed best donut I've ever tried and will fight people on that.
0:26 omg he looks just like me fr!!! 😎 (it doesn't)
Lmfaooo I hope not 😂😂😂
Ryan Gosling looked good in Barbie ❤
Huh? Can anyone explain why so many people hate The Barbie movie? Plz
Female gaze: Victoria Secret
Male gaze : Por/n hub
In conclusion both are wrong… but a lot of people are not ready for this conversation
Another example
Most beautiful woman in world
Female gaze : Bella hadid
Male gaze : Sidney Weeny
FG: Anya Taylor
MG: Ana de Armas
I think both are male gaze
Thank you. So interesting
Happened to me I was 16 a guy won't stop bothering/following me to the point that I boarded a bus to the wrong direction and he followed me in the bus.. when i paid my fare it was clear that I'm not getting off and he didn't want to pay so he got off..
18:33 yeah, but the notion of a single male gaze also oversimplifies every man's experience and perspective, so why are people saying that all men objectify women? Why do people tend to overgeneralize what men experience but not what women experience?
Also, when the Barbie movie came out, men decided to own the whole KENough thing because they didn't think it was right for women to be mocking men as a way to get back at men, so they decided to challenge that thinking through sarcasm/comedy.
I 100% agree with some other comments here mentioninf that sometimes if not most of the time, the female gaze is just as misogynistic as the male gaze and that.
For a wonderful on-screen depiction of well written, diverse, nuanced female characters who are not over sexualised and are at the centre of all the action, watch the show 'Killing Eve'.
My only thing w the gazes is that if u have a low reaction (like a simple cool) if some1 asks u if the person is cute. People immediately slap you with a jealous label or weird
Yesterday, I was otp w a male friend and he was like “ *DAMNNNN* ” He does this so much I literally know what just that reaction means. He shows me a instagram of a fit, muscular blonde girl. Callin her a bad b and what not. Dont get me wrong, she’s pretty. she really is but even as a hetero fem she just wouldn’t be someone I’d go crazy for. I like the dark ones ^^ (and im on the AA spectrum so that makes it really hard) but because I had this “negative” reaction he thought I was jealous which is weird because I never said that or hinted at that.
And I get accused of being jealous a lot because someone had a big reaction At something and I’d just go “Nice-pretty-cool” because I do not care. But i dont want to pretend and seem snobbish (because im chub fem so its stereotypes and i have to watch what I say and do or id be labeled) its really hard fitting in w my age range w all this 😢
The female gaze is NOT hinged on any of this social justice warrior crap. It's solely about what traits women find ATTRACTIVE in man.. vs what men THINK women like ie. "Looking like Arnold Schwarzenegger"
I love your videos queen Tysm for your amazing content ❤
I think Maddy Perez is my favourite