Discarded by a narcissist after doing everything for them. toxic people will use you & then
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- Опубликовано: 19 сен 2024
- DISCARDED BY A NARCISSIST AFTER DOING EVERYTHING FOR THEM. TOXIC PEOPLE WILL USE YOU & THEN DISCARD
Some people refer to narcissists as emotional t3rrorists and users. Building up a toxic person will typically result in them using you and your resources and then leaving you for someone else. The narcissistic discard can be brutal. #narcissistdiscard #narcissisticdiscard
Welcome my channel! If this is your first time seeing my face or hearing my voice, my name is Lee and I am a self aware narcissist. I have narcissistic personality disorder ( NPD ) and I've been in therapy for my personality disorder since 2017 and it has definitely changed my life because without it, I would have lost everything.
The point of these videos is to help bring awareness from the other side of the narcissistic *buse spectrum. All my videos give perspective on why many narcissists do what they do and the possible different reasons behind them. The victims and survivors get validation and the Narcissists (those that are willing) get to see that you can get help and that you are not alone.
1 on 1's and all my links - beacons.page/m...
You can find me on -
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Facebook - / mentalhealness85
Click the BEACON up top for direct links. Thank you so much and lets HEAL together
The discard phase is the best because the narcissistis show you their true colors! It hurts, but you can always look back and remember that discard
They make a mess of their life and need someone to blame. By dumping you, they think they’re getting rid of their problems.
Let that toxicity roll on and out.
yes they will. then theyre horribly mean to you afterwards for the things they did and got caught doing, but blame you instead.
🎯🎯🎯
Blame shifting. Dirty Bastards
It is the worst! For people that act like they "don't care" they sure do put a lot of energy into hating.
How triggering 🙈 when we meet I had graduated top of my class in college, successful, was involved in church, ran in races, beautiful inside and out meanwhile he had no job, no money, etc. He used me, abused me, resented me and cheated on me 🥺 even though I left him, I can see how he waited until I had built him up and he started making real money to then cheat on me and take her on trips, buy her things, etc. I hate how unfair it is and I wish I could go back… I’d never give him the time of day.
You are still all those beautiful, powerful things, and on top of that, you now have the wisdom to never give another narc your time or energy again. Focus on rebuilding yourself even bigger and better. Come on mama, YOU CAN DO IT!!!!
@@fruitypopwhickle6806 Thank you for the encouragement 🙏 Rebuilding has been extremely difficult 😣 Sometimes it feels impossible… but I keep pushing on hoping I can one day look at myself again and be proud.
Same. I lost so much.
@@SuckerPunch92 Sorry to hear that Tay ☹️ it sucks and is unfair but I have to believe God will use it to do amazing things. Stay strong 💪
@@crystalchavez6968 I believe so too! Happy you’re not in that situation anymore
“What are they doin besides clappin ya cheeks and making you laugh” 🤣🤣🤣 Boyyyy that is 4 years of therapy summed up in one sentence. I WISH my therapists said this shit to me when I first started this downhill path. Would have saved me years of fuxkery. Sir, THANK YOU for your service. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
No joke LMAO 😅😮
The first time i was discarded was also my first breakup. He discarded me for another woman. I didnt know who the woman was at the time but he made it obvious he was cheating. I attempted suicide. I called him while in the hospital and all he did was yell at me. He was so cold. I blocked him for 9 months. Then i stupidly allowed him back into my life. He discarded me AGAIN after i got pregnant. Hurt bad but not as much as the first time. Now i’m sitting here dumb and heartbroken. Narcissism is real. Thank you for these videos.
Wow, Bless your heart hun. Mine left me with 2 kids and one of them being a newborn. He Was cheating for months but I’m glad the dead weight is gone. The baby will bring you so much love and joy that you will have no need for that loser. Just make sure he stays gone or he will leave you in worse shape the next time.
@@marianamana5322 i’m sorry you’re going through that. They’re horrible people. But thank you for your kind words. It’s so refreshing to hear other’s stories because sometimes i feel very alone in all of this. But you’re right! Some days i don’t even feel anything cause my baby makes me so happy! I see the light at the end of the tunnel definitely
😞
@@Tumpard that’s sad. Sorry! how’s the baby doing?
While I realize my mistakes, it takes no accountability away from his tricks and games. I lived it not knowing anything I know now about NPD. Glad I know now. I regret the way I acted sometimes. He was literally setting me up. This is why not knowing hurts. Knowledge is power! Losing him even as a friend is best for me. He is a bad person that pretends to be good smh
stay empowered
The game never ends with them, they are horrible people
Same here
I did gotten nothing out of it in those 4 years but I helped him with everything , it's all so true what u saying without me he still would be walking
A woman in the toxic relationship usually spends her time and energy making him feel like he is the only man for her. While she's giving him everything that she possibly can, all he can think about is what he can say or do to take another little piece of her heart. (i guess the same goes for the non-narc male.)
🥺
The same does go for us. Me and my son have been discarded. His mom never sees him or calls for him. He is so heartbroken over it. It’s fucking painful
@@Coffeendonuts I’m sorry. My son’s childhood was ruined because of his father. He’s 20 and doesn’t want anything to do with him. I hope your son knows that he is not to blame. I really hope you are both able to heal.
Truly evil
@@tam-i-am2022 he’s only 4. I reassure him it’s not his fault but he gets sad often. Anytime he leaves visits from his grandparents or brother and sisters he gets sad and misses them but he says it’s because he thinks everyone is going to leave like his mom.
I wish I would have known about your channel a lot earlier. My ex really made me feel like I’m worth nothing, he discarded me 3 times within 9 months and I always begged him to take me back and he did. But he would say stuff like: if you quit with your demands and act nice and don’t discuss stuff with me anymore, we can be together. Like it’s Crazy that I was ok with that! He didn’t even hesitate to tell me all the time that if I behave wrong, he will just get himself another woman because it’s easy for him. I began to feel like I was crazy. He was cheating by texting other women and after his final discard he didn’t even apologize for it. He said: if I was worthy of his person, he wouldn’t have cheated..
I don’t wish this on my worst enemy.
I hope you find peace, healing and it will pass. Keep your head up and remember you are worthy and someone out there will love you the same way you pour out to others.
@@bigsisterology thank you so much for your kind words 🥰 looking forward
I was discarded in August 2020 and I am still struggling to come to terms with this. I met my ex in 2013, a few months after he had attempted suicide. I gave him a home, supported him financially for a while, helped him find a job, supported him with his mental health problems, pretty much built my entire life around him. I really thought that I had found my soul mate and that he loved me just as much I loved him. Turns out that I was wrong. He accused me of treating him like a second class citizen and said that he never asked for my help with anything. I feel so crushed 😞
That's terrible of him. Accept that he is an awful person and move on by doing things you like. Buy yourself your favorite desserts or anything you always wanted. You are better off without him bringing you down.
Hi @ Rose Lloyd,… sorry for what happened to you, but I’d like to share something with you. I am a Christian and I love God with all my heart. This happened to me last year after 3 years and I never saw it coming. My head was 😵💫 spinning. I was very to naive and had never heard of Narcissism. But Narcissism is actually spiritual. If People with NPD, not everyone does but if they are a true one you should be able to look into their past, family history, etc, and see cause and effect. It usually effects those who have either experienced extreme neglect or trauma as children or were raised in homes with Narcissistic parents that didn’t not love or raise them correctly. so this is going to sound strange but they are actually being controlled by a demonic spirit. Demons hate light and anything that is good. So if you ex is truly a Narcissist he’s under the influence of a demonic spirit that only knows evil. There are a lot of people on You Tube that explain the spiritual side . Try Pastor RC Blake’s he’s got about 8 videos that break it all the way down. Again God bless you and I’m sorry for the pain you went through, trust me the fog will pass. There was nothing you did wrong or could do to save him, he will continue to repeat the same cycle of destroying others and if he doesn’t get delivered he will end up destroying himself and that’s exactly what the devil wants, cause he hates him too . 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽
Great video, that is exactly what happened to me. I helped him get on his feet after a motorcycle accident when we met, but as soon as he got on his feet and started to work and make good money, he started making future plans that did not include me. Talking about HE was moving out of state and buying a house and HE was going to take trips etc.And we are married. Eventually HE took a job out of state and I WENT NO CONTACT.
stay empowered
I'm sorry you went through that awfulness. Get therapy, restore your self love and find someone who appreciates you.
@@PaperMario64 thank you 🙏🏽 I’m actually doing great. Getting him out of my life made me happy 💕
@@MentalHealness I really love how real you are & have a lot of respect for exposing these ppl but can you talk a little slower possibly? 🙏
Its so on point 💯would give this video 1000likes it describes all these ab. **
Got nothing but cptsd. He would cycle between admitting he was hurting me and it was wrong and denying and blaming me and making it seem like I was the one with the problem because I always had an issue with him FOR GOOD REASONS.
So real. When I said to him all the things I was trying in our relationship to keep him happy before discard." He said gone head with all that playing the victim we just didn't get each other say what u want " such nonchalant responses. Smh
Yep
Yasss indeed!! I know the feeling.
This was a life learning experience .. MR. Lee great job reenacting …I did that exact scenario .. then the discard was a forced one .. where I chose myself and went cold turkey no contact .. best decision .. I realized I did not need that “ trash” … I learned discernment .. self value .. and am not desperate nor alone .. got my grip ..
The way you re enact the 1st scenes lee I can't help but laugh😂😂😂 even though this is the hardest moment in life I have experienced... But thanks to you I am learning and getting stronger day by day ...
I really lost myself in it and didn't see it coming, and blamed me for everything saying it didn't work out from the start, (14 years) he led me on, walked off entitled. I didn't see it coming, it was such a shock. It's over now. He just walked off with another girl, who is just a friend. And yes, he looked at me blankly when I was crying and after a while he said, "are you done now?" Now I have nothing.
I have blocked him completely but there isn't any use. He doesn't care.. cos he got what he wanted. And he felt he was too good for me. His new girl said so too.. like she is wrong for you. He actually said that to my face and left citing that as a reason. Now both of them in different town, mirroring all my work and qualities and I'm sitting here exhausted trying to find a way out texting you. It already done. And you are right, he had nothing to offer but his presence. Also, everytime I asked him to do something for the company.. he and this girl would avoid it. Now I see that they do the same things ro promote themselves.
I mean I guess I thought I'm with him pushing him forward, and he will do the same that's what love is. And you are right, when I met him he wasn't that great.. now his ego and standards are high, and mine resources are depleted. Never compromise your self worth for anyone. They don't appreciate your contributions.
The video and all these comments resonate with me. I was taken by him financially in soo many ways. Emotional and psychological abuse daily. I could write a novel on what he did to me. It just got worse and worse everytime I accepted his disgusting behavior. I was trauma bonded and taken down to my knees. Just the last three years he demanded I pay him money for conversations. As far as I know nobody has experienced this one. He lived in my familys apartment rent free, I paid for pretty much everything when we went out, whenever he wanted anything I gave it to him etc etc. Nothing was ever enough. I was always blamed and told I needed to change. 7 years of doing everything humanly possible to be discarded like I'm nothing. I would never wish this on anyone. It is pure hell and torture.
Used me for a free place to live. Met some girl online. Left me for her. Didn't work out for them. Now he blames me for him being homeless. 😆😆😆
She told me that she never loved anybody before. Said she was abused blah blah blah. So i asked if it made sense abusing the only person that loved her for the past 15 yrs. No answer. All this came when she found out i was leaving her. She didn't realize that i allowed her to find out as a last ditched effort. I left. I survived. I am happy...
I told him one of my friends said I deserved better, and it sparked the discard.
People questioned him allllll the time. Asking him how he got me. He isn’t attractive. I thought he was cute. I didn’t care. Once, he discarded me, it hurt so bad. He used me. Told me himself that he thought I could change him because I’m a good person. That broke me. It’s so selfish. I don’t think he ever liked me. Let alone loved me. I’m in a much better place now but it was rough.
Wow same thing with me! Asked how he got me me too. He thought he couldn’t have better and settled with his ex wife (still married across the country) used me.. and begged for me back cried threatened suicide saying me leaving was revenge being crazy I feel for it and 10 months later we’re back here.. doesn’t love me anymore built him up.. used me .. lied cheat or tried too couldn’t look past anything anymore .. friends always made fun of him like how he got me I guess .. told me he wanted to change for me and be with me and do anything .. we tried therapy didn’t work just lied better and manipulated.. church I prayed with him all that .. he also convinced me later I was the abuser .. it just gets worse.. got thrown into a dresser had bruises choked shoved dragged away from the room cried devauled degraded they sure do turn.. worse after you go back .. for leaving them or whatever.. I called the wife the first time it seems they both played games with eachother couldn’t believe either of them. Had called us both crazy at once and he’ll find someone better he told me that within the first two years it’s crazy actually.
I feel he loved and hated me at the same time and I just caught on more this time and the withdraws I’ve had to go through hurt but I know I’m healing everyday and God is with me and they can’t take our light from us.. I know he used me as social status and gain and acting hot now.. he just moved here like 3 years ago .. going down a path it seems that is worse .. I called him out more this time and caught on. I guess he can’t play his own game anymore because we have the joy and light..
But this happened to me too.. I thought he was my bestfriend.. he said he never thought he was cute .. and he settled .. couldn’t find better then got her had me and now trash after he got his likes up.😩
@@VictoriaMeeker I am so sorry you experienced all that abuse. I pray that God gives you strength and that he be your anchor. ♥️
This is exactly my experience. I. Feel. Seen! Thanks, Lee! It is so painful to view but validating too.
YOU GOT IT!
Whoa, triggering is right. This brought back all of his toxic BS. 😫 I paid for the bulk of his divorce and expensive eye surgery. He dumps me and in June he sent me a text saying he had been using me. That was a HUGE mistake as I am now suing him for reimbursement of the loans. He is also keeping me from seeing his boys. He said he needed me in his life to get full custody from his ex. Now that the custody is settled, he discards me. So, I am filing for companionship with his sons as per Ohio visitation laws. They added a section to the grandparents rights allowing persons who have an interest in the child (do not have to be related) to request companionship. I'm trying to keep him accountable for his narc manipulation. I'll let you know how it turns out if you are interested. My benefit from the relationship was his sons ❤
Interested. stay safe and protected
THIS IS CRAZY TRUTHS!!! MY LORD Mr. Lee, it’s so ABSOLUTELY TRUE!!! I’m NOT in a relationship just a friendship & everything you’ve said I have done as a friend & his attitude is how dare you be better at life than him! WOW!!! 🤦🏽♀️ The saving grace is that I finally cut him off first but him near death 3-weeks ago, caused me to resurface & help out with a business deal. It’s done now but he seems to think I’m back to stay for the crazy treatment! NOT SO!!! I’m slowly backing up & if that doesn’t work, plan B is going straight ghost permanently. I will not allow him to use sympathy/empathy to manifest me again!!!
I let my narc ex move into my rental that I had lived in for over 6 years after we had been dating for 10 months, added her to my lease... After two years of abuse (including physical) we broke up and she moved into the guest room and then REFUSED to move out or sign off of the lease, told me she had proof that I was instable mentally and how she could prove to the landlord that she was able to pay the entire rent by herself and I wasn't, had become buddy buddies with the landlord and repeatedly threatened to have me removed from my home I let her in... Took a DV protection order to have her removed.... Be careful people!
At the discard I was in so much pain! I had to reach out for help due to the physical and mental pain! Turned out he had lined up the next one and I wasn't behaving the same way anymore. I had started to say 'No'... He said he left me before I eft him? And suddenly the things he had always got me to do for him were me trying to 'manipulate and control him'.... He said he never asked me to do those thing, and I had "offered"... I never did. He always made me feel like I had to help no matter how uncomfortable it made me. Apparently it was for 'us'... He guilted me into helping... He was so hurtful at the end I just wanted to die... But thanks to videos like this I can finally make sense of it all. I'm still 12k in debt for him but I'm free. Like you say... pick your hard. Its been hard staying away when he wants to meet for 'closure' but you've given me the strength to stick to my guns. Thank you Lee 😊
Yep it’s always “us” category make you think your the abuser or the victim.. stuff you want them to do because you want love and care but if they do it it’s with conditions .. when you cry they think your manipulating them because that’s what they do when you ask they think your taking advantage of them because that’s what they do when you say no they think your being mean because that’s what they do. It’s like a mirror accept the use and abuse and discard after your service is up next.. and we want love and don’t want a game but they think it’s a game because they play it like a fucking game 😩😩
I cried all the time it got worse and a mess.. they just don’t want broken no more. They mirror you to get you and then mirror back what they are afraid of and then mirror back your fears and insecurities and use that and leave.. your scared they’ll leave they will you think you deserve better they will test you and give that to you while having a replacement you start standing up for yourself well “no one ask you to be here you can leave” us “we want to be treated better we don’t deserve this no one should be talked to this way or tolerate this” “then leave find someone else than that will do that for you” like damn come on 😩✌🏼
And going back is worse .. I told him I felt like dying staying with him so with or without them it’s better to leave they will watch you cry and go insane because of them and they just love it .. and will get bored and discard you worse then he would start to say your so annoying “do you want me to die cause I literally wanna kill myslef you make me crazy” yeah then start doing that when I’m reality you’ve been feeling this way for years
On Point!!! It's like you watched my entire relationship play out. Continuing a friendship after breaking up really helped me realize unequivocally that I was being used. I told him I would be a fool to continue to share my body with him and was discarded(again). This time I was truly grateful!!! No turning back now EVER!
Spot on. I was with the woman for 7 months, who recently broke up with me last week after I fixed her car and help her enroll back in college and bought her new furniture for her house. Well last monday she broke up with me and smeared me on Facebook then she started using the same phrase " I never asked you to do it for me" you volunteered and I'm like " no, you asked me to do it and now after you got your car fixed & back in college " now you say you tired but we never fought much and you want to discard me and tell me you never loved me, yes it hurts but I swear ill never get in another relationship again because I'm mentally tired of being used and manipulated
🙏🏽🙏🏽
Whew! Watching your opening role play brought me right back! Juuuust finished divorcing the ex; took two years and tens of thousands of dollars to get absolutely nothing of the six figure debt the ex left me in. It was ridiculous. I am working on me, staying single and rebuilding myself. I’m learning to fall in love with me.
This nearly drove me over the edge it was a lot worse I was forced to discard after being so ill the abuse was horoundious at that time and I got on well with his family he could hardly tell them he was abuse and was cheating on me good luck to the new lady this narrissist is high on the spector scale physcopath threatened me physically he scared the hell out of me at the time now I am healing and doing so much better he came back but I just pacified him and told him I don't want to be in a relationship with anyone I said nothing about narrissists I was that scared of him hopfuly that the last of him but I won't hold my breath from feedback they always come back 💯
stay safe!
It’s so weird…how this happens. It starts with so many “us “ statements then once the unit is created and maintained ( house, cars, etc) they suddenly outgrow the environment and then will throw out “co-dependency” as an attack once they are ready to move on
I have been discarded. After five years of holding my husband down through a baby and three jobs now that I have no income and need him he just expressed that he will be doing the bare minimum which is actually an upgrade from what he has been doing for the past five years. When I say bare minimum like soap and toilet paper. No phone barely utilities barely rent barely food.
oh my goodness
Wow. This certainly hit home. Especially about the difference in social status. EXACTLY what I went through
😮😮
That's exactly what my ex-husband did to me he used me to help him get out of financial trouble then he told me he doesn't need me anymore 👎🏽
I’m so sorry that happen to you. My ex did the same thing. I helped him with a lot. I lost my job and there was no need for me anymore
@@SuckerPunch92I totally understand I am sorry that happened to you as well. I'm not trying to wish bad on anybody but the Bible does say you reap what you sow now he's dealing with a terminal illness. He remarried someone I knew not to long after that because she had more money. Anyway I am so glad I'm not in that situation no more he was a narcissist and a very mean person. It has made me stronger and God bought me through it and I'm sure he is doing or he has done the same thing for you. God-bless will keep you in my prayer. 🙏🏽❤
@@lillianwisdom8298 absolutely! I’m so happy God protected you! Thank you! 🥰♥️
@@SuckerPunch92thanks and you are welcome and God-bless🙏🏽
I've been there. In my case, I was ignored for months and was left wondering where I stood. I figured I'd been discarded and hadn't caught on so I walked away.
Me too. He discarded me after I left and came back and then once I was back the discard was way worse , silent treatment, acting funny... finally once my dad pass I said enough is enough decided he wanted to be single and I left .
I was discarded constantly but lived a long distance marriage due to him choosing to constantly travel for work and didn’t realize what was happening. He wasn’t sacrificing like I was. He was just putting himself in an easier position to live the single life while taking all the credit for my efforts in the marriage and successes and responsibilities. It was the loneliest time of my life.
Literally my story!! M divorced now n free of Narc, starting my life n career from Zero!!
This is so typical. My
Mom just did this to me after using me help for her surgery recovery. I thought she had changed but as soon as she was done needing my help and recovered she discarded me so heartlessly and returned to her previous behavior 😢😢😢😢 I told her how much time and money I spent on her and she said she didn't ask me to help ever because my dad was going to help her anyway. My dad would have injured her more 😢😢😢 anyway she discarded me like it was nothing all her love bombing when I was helping her meant nothing to her. If she wasn't my mother i would have cut all contacts with her long ago
Soooo kinda hilarious story. I’m currently dating someone new after dumping the ex narc twice! And yes I let him Hoover me as a friend. I wasn’t hip to that yet. Bleeping narcs always have a new con. Annnnyway new guy says I love you like a week in. Wants me to move in and meet his kids and blah blah blah. I’m immediately turned off. Told him no sane person behaves that way. He’s sweet admits when he’s wrong and claims to be just like me….hmmm. Ok so fast forward 3 months with me keeping an eye on him and matching his energy. Still can’t get over his narcalicious love bombing maneuvers early on. He doesn’t quite get it but knows I don’t trust him. Thinks I’m still recovering from the prior relationship. Which is facts BUT I’m actually performing an experiment. Watching him upclose. He has no idea what’s up and I have absolutely no illusion about him. We may not make it to Vday and that’s ok. I made him pay for the reservation in advance. I’m taking my son. He’ll know why even though I won’t have to say much. Coverts are idiots
Narcs never discard good supply, if they do its because their supply isn't supplying anymore.
LOL. You say 'good' as though he hasn't got side pieces. So what are the good ones doing ... all getting chlamydia together 😂
@@abdulc5726 side pieces are called side pieces because they are shelf supply. As far as the std thing goes, idk, why don't you tell us since you seem to know 🤣🤣🤣
Mine is on the way out 😢 we share a child. I am still in shock that this is him all the way and that I believed his bread crumbs:( burns 🔥
It seems like narcissists love to use people financially. Isnt that like the other person is giving them charity?
Whew 😅 we got the tough love comin in hot today
I remember standing in the bathroom trying to cheer him up, comfort him, or reassuring him during his pity party all while he was pooing 😂 damn shame could have saved myself so much
Yea, this is me tonight. Crying just to know I am just a damn used object. I told him to leave, let me go , leave, nothing works. He said he liked me and can't leave. I said 5% like and 95% hate, he laughed.
😞😞😞
were you in my house?! I went through that exact situation. when I no longer tolerate him and his shenignans
Unbelievably spot on. Thank you for everything
This is exactly what I’m going through at this time I game my all built him up and be cheated and left me for someone else and he did and said everything that u just stated we have done and been thru and yes I begged and yes he had me where he wanted me it’s sick that every thing u said and he actually did resent me for it he hates me for it almost and he was always mad at me for catching him cheating and leaving me it was crazy how he treated me I’m only two weeks into the discard when I caught him with her he left me and em ran to her
Thanks 😊 a little bit of knowledge daily goes a longggg way 👍 keeps a person moving forward consistently in the right direction no matter how long the situation in the past lasted.
I've just been discarded. It's agony.
stay empowered🙏🏽🙏🏽
Wow. Hearing it said and explained like this....
🙌🏾
I remember giving my all. I was exhausted but he left me. I was shocked 😳 crying and we were done. He told me to stop crying because it just wasn’t working anymore. I felt sick and looked horrible but within a couple of weeks he popped back up. We were right back into it. Then I broke up with him and he didn’t like it at all and stated “allow me to see you again and I’ll release you”. I’m like wth what in T.I. Tip Harris stuff is going on here. He discarded me all the time. Then come back and I would come running 🏃🏿 smh 🤦🏽♀️
Yep I kept running in and out more and crying panic attacks my head was spinning begged me cried at first threatened suicide could breath without me loved me so much wanted me promised forever then boom ten months inn started again couldn’t get over the past .. rage lies cheat wife abuse degrading devaluing all that I was broken trying to keep it together then kept calling him out again while he played me again realizing my worth calling him out lies and things he was doing wasn’t enough I was so exhausted and numb then he discarded me didn’t love me anymore then self deprecated and said I deserve better stay away and he’ll miss me so much etc and he’ll come back when he’s ready then said even if I love you once I’m done I’m done then same thing .. I’ll come back if I feel the way I use to feel it’s so crazy .. told him to block me wrote him off it’s always over text with them and or go back to his wife at least he blocked me and then unblocked on messenger now back to normal haven’t touched it it’s odd idk what the hell but throw one played Victim so much and cried and had other disorders and narc for sure rage lies abuse man it goes on and on then you start asking yourself what the hell and they think your crazy and the narc don’t take them to therapy just use that against you 😩 use them to fake treat you better for a bit
Mine said also set me free like I do with you like whaaaaaaaaaat 😩😩😩 do everything you can to stay away from me hate me get mad whatever like almost like pushing me away but don’t love me but come back maybe? I kept asking why and why and why he didn’t wanna hear it .. then said he got fed up tired of himself and me but didn’t make sense since he caused it and then said he can’t feel there’s no love in his heart can’t feel love toward me anymore he exhausted himself and I caught on and like almost like he caught up with himself 🥴
Push pull make you think they give you chances then you come back then you run and come back cause your scared and they know it and it just a cycle and you trying to get out and fight yourself with self love and that’s what it is
@@VictoriaMeeker exactly and it seems it won’t end. I actually stayed away for a good six months. The first month or two felt horrible but by the time the third month came around I felt this tremendous weight come off of me and I’m like omg this is how it feels not to have him in my life and it felt great!!! But silly me with a big heart saw a huge emergency that happened on TV and decided to give him a call because I knew it was going to involve an emergency with family and before you know it I was sucked back in again. That heaviness came back within a couple of days and I felt horrible again. I literally said I want off of this T.I. and Tiny ride 🎡 lol. Go get my power/life back.
I never went through that. I discarded my narcissist before he could discard me. He hoovered me for a year.
stay safe
Off topic but I can't believe that you got 6k views and only 466 likes wtf are all these people watching for if they dont like you . Just wondering because I think your amazing and I'm so happy that you are bettering yourself for your wife and family.
Thank you
Starting at 2: 15 Lee.... it never went as far as me helping him with anything, but people would say 'he's a male golddigger, gonna bleed you dry.' I liked him the way he was, but he doesn't like himself that way. I didn't want to get to the point that he was getting money or a borrowing car or whatever from me. Maybe on some level he knew that wasn't going to happen.
But he played me anyway! All I know about him now is that he works at a dive bar. As far as I know, he's never had his own car, and has always had a bunch of roommates, usually female. I've lived alone forever, own a house, etc, It's so hard to admit because we all want to be liked for ourselves, not what material things we can provide-- so when he ghosted me maybe it was because he saw he wasn't going to get anything in terms of material support from me . He's a grown man, pushing 40. If he hasn't figured it out yet he probably won't.
There's this saying---"There's nothing worse than being played by someone you lowered your standards to be with."
I think in a way discarding me/manipulating the relationship into being mainly sex was a power trip for him. He felt it was the only power he had.
And yes, they learn from you and take that knowledge into the next relationship. It's like an inexperienced guy/girl learning about sex from an older more experienced person lol. Dumps her/him and uses those tricks on the one she/he really wants. Don't be someone's teacher!! A sad story old as time.
I kind of relate to this but I didn’t really build him up. Though he did buy a house, because I already had my own. I also coached him and gave him insider information on how to negotiate a better job offer and promotion. Also taught him how to court a woman in terms of wining and dining culture and where the best spots are in our city, and the best wines, and the best music venues and scene - because I genuinely wanted to share those experiences with him and build a connection.
He spent the dinners at the end starting at girls young enough to be his daughter super obviously whilst ignoring and talking down to me. He also admitted he stole my music tastes and told all his friends HE found out about the music venues and gigs so they would think he’s “cool” and didn’t tell them that I was the one who showed him.
He then used his money from the promotions I backed him and coached him on to take out other women behind my back. Lucky me.
I literally got discarded because I asked him to sober up and get mental health before he moved in with me. I waited an entire year trying to fix our marriage. He moved someone in during a manic episode, promised to kick her out all week because he "made a mistake" . One day he will see that narcissist will love bomb anyone that can better their life. Narcissist do not care unless their needs are being met and it's sad that they have no regard how their actions affect other people
The reason some give there all is because in the love bomb makes you believe that this is your husband or wife a horrible trick
Yooooo if this wasn’t my ex she fit this narcissist description perfectly lol 😂
I appreciate your videos...this one especially.......Thank you 🙏🏾
10000% right on.
This was deep!!! Thanks 😊
Wow…. This is 100% true.
Jesus it was word for word
So hatred is fully warranted then. . . thank you.
The worst was last year. I had to run out of the house each morning before he got up. Ran to women's shelters several times. It was beyond horrible...I thought. Until the discard and I spun out. Here's the thing, my friend: I did not love him. I did not want him. That didn't matter. I purposely detached. But I'm still picking up the pieces 4 mths later. Why? I don't get it.
Spot on!
its not you its THEM !! they are evil, lying con artists!! God has better for you
🙏🏽
They are a lost cause. Your money and efforts are in the sewage so don't expect anything in return.
This is so true...
I glad u didn't wanna live without ur wife and child im glad that made u changed lee. U know ur wife is Not Replaceable
Amazing video 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
They all use the same play book I’m so glad they are being exposed!!! Ruining lives for nothing my god have mercy on their poor souls!
Ugh this is my ex😭
Ok it's gonna take alot for me to reach out on here .. I've been watching you for a while .. I watch a few others on here too. But I love how u put it black and white.. I've been in my relationship for almost 12 years.. and it's getting bad.. he doesn't cheat .. he's not like a bad guy but these things happen mind games that just aren't okay .. like I losing my fucking mind. I have 10000% lost myself .. everything I am or knew I don't know anymore.. it's so hard to get out of this funk let alone how do I ask for help when I have noone I've lost them all ... it's so hard to explain mentally what's going on. My kids are miserable I'm failng them.. I don't know I just need someone to talk to
follow me on instagram @mentalhealnesss . A lot survivors there going through similar situations
IF you do NOT give them ALL your time and efforts....they will cheat! Whether they say to your face they aren't, TRUST ME...THEY ARE!!!
My Son in the Marines. Disrespected, yelled at me, took former stepmom in consideration over his own mom
🥺😩😩
@@MentalHealness that’s just in a nutshell. My new Granddaughter will never get to know me😔
My ex covert Narcissist boyfriend discarded me for someone else he was cheating on me this whole time
So I’ve got a question now ….if I built him up for the next and for him to be better for the next then will he always be better for the next or is he love bombing her and will be later treat her bad also
Mine dropped dead
A Straight Villain bogust
Trueeee!!
Yeah my ex is a garbage human being who knows exactly what she is doing then plays the I am a POS feel bad for me
Could you do a video on maybe not to take things personal? The I don’t love you anymore personally even though they been in and out.. my situation was crazyyy😭
Yep accepted temper rage abuse marriage or whatever build them up where they fake being alone and fine and they know your scared to be alone they leave you .. like who can reject who first .. 😭
You're not supposed to be constantly wondering what's going to happen if you break up. It's called trust
right tho 💯
Discarded myself he could go back to his wife in the other country came back crying attempting suicide couldn’t breath without me then I told him I wasn’t gonna trust him and take me a while to get through it .. he helped for a bit but I kept crying and paranoid he still kept doing things and faked being this nice person and what I needed I was tough love when he came back. Loved me so much couldn’t see life without me then discarded me don’t love you anymore ..
So is that the same thing as last time? Don’t have to say it say it for it to be the same thing .. I’m noticing they always in and out pattern .. words I’m guessing don’t matter they can’t regulate there full emotion capacity anyway? Want one thing then too stressful your too broken they leave? I told him to block me or go go back to the wife which he said no he blocked me then unblocked me 2 weeks ago and haven’t touched anything but the anxiety is real. I just don’t want him to think I’m thinking of watching and waiting ..
Will they eventually have a down fall once they discard you?
Their whole life is a down fall. Most narcissists could have everything in the world and will still be unhappy and unfulfilled because there is something missing inside. The one thing you can be sure of is the next person they get with will also be discarded. Or worse, they will keep them around while cheating on them the whole time. A discard is a blessing for YOU. Its a chance for you to learn the red flags, learn why you overlooked them or didn't see them and improve your defenses and boundaries so that you don't attract another one.
Yes this !!
@@PaperMario64 learning this the hard way. Built this guy up social status had nothing coming here from another country has a wife in another country used me discarded me but first begged me back then built him up he thinks he’s good now 😭. Realized I was drained but he was drained from lying cheat rage abuse brainwashed thinks he slick 😭😭
@@VictoriaMeeker Dang. Sorry you got tied up with a user like that. But now you know better. A education about narcissists is priceless.
@@PaperMario64 yeah definitely hurts especially cause they walk around fine .. I got used abused rage degraded everything and he acts like he won .. it sucks .. choked strangulated thrown across the room like called so many names and yeah.. it got worse the second break .. like I built him up ..
Man isn't that the truth!!! 7 month apart trying to find my own way after, almost to the T of this skit!!!
I just want to move forward and not repeat the same situation ever again.
Might want to try a 1x1 if not to costly... how can I find out?
I just want to get out of thise haze.
Lee what about been married with them
How they treat there wife
Why they don't discard there parters
Hello. I want to know this...... what is this .... I have accomplished nothing at my age and I am tired of delay delay....I'm the problem, but I can't let go... what's my problem?
So coverts think this probably in there head but so it nicely out loud and okay victim for letting you go ? “Set me free like I do with you” “you deserve better I’m a piece of crap” “get mad hate me it won’t work rn” all over text of course so they want us to feel bad for them letting us go and not love us? “I’ll miss you so much” “I’ll come back if I feel the way I use too” huh😭
Accept I knew what I was dealing with
Yeah..I heard " I never loved you."
I got “I don’t think I cared for you as much as you cared for me. I cared as much as I could.”🙄
@@JJFoxiTwiHard97 that was a load of 💩.. I am sorry that happened
no benefit at all ❤
Left after 11 yrs with my money, that I invested for a Business. Scam
YEAHHH... NO....
My story. The end. Ugh..
Mine did that .. look and feel differently .. yep options .. but he still won’t change right 😩 such married asshole damn 😭 him..
My ex did use and discard and smear 🤣
😅