ONE OF THE SADDEST THINGS IS THAT EVERY EMPATH I'VE MET HAS BEEN FORCED TO ENDURED UNIMAGINABLE CRUELTY AND SUFFERING THROUGHOUT MOST OF THEIR LIVES AT THE HANDS OF THOSE WHO CLAIMED TO LOVE THEM. ❤❤❤❤
It makes me realize what the Bible explains about Jesus. Never lied,never committed one sin and he helped many people in his 33years of life”But he carried his cross and died for the bad of all sinners. We must guard our hearts and not let the evil from others to change us. Vengeance belongs to God. His punishment is way worse than we could give. We good people couldn’t live with the guilt of doing wrong “ Truly give it in prayer and watch God work!! It really really does work ONCE YOU truly let it go and trust Gods got this!!
My narc shot himself in the foot. He discarded me 2 weeks ago by ending our 7 year marriage. He sat me down to talk to me and simply said 'i'm sorry to say this but let's go our separate ways' and his reasons were very vague, nothing sensible....I told him I respect his decision. The next day I started packing my stuff and he panicked and asked me not to make quick decisions 😂😂😂 I'm still packing away slowly planning my way out. UPDATE > Hi everyone thank you for your kind comments. I just wanted to update everyone on my progress. I FINALLY MOVED OUT!!! I moved to a different city. I've levelled down in a big way in terms of standard of living/lifestyle. I've found my own little place, i'm job hunting and this past week has been the happiest I've been in a very, very long time so I say it's a big LEVEL UP!! Thanks again to all you kind hearts.
Call the cops and go… the first and only time my ex husband ever hit me was when we separated and I asked him to leave my new apartment I woke up 4 days later in the icu ….
I gave my ex probably the most effort I’ve given anyone I’ve ever dated in my 32 years on this planet. She discarded me 72hrs after the best night we had in our entire relationship, gaslighting ME saying that I was making things too serious and moving too fast and such when I know for a fact it was mutual and her avoidant ass started to catch feelings and got scared so she ran for the hills. Or so I thought…. Come to find out that like a week into no contact, my sister creeped her Instagram (for the record, I actually did NOT ask my sister to do this and even voiced my displeasure in her doing so and sending me screen shots), and not only had she taken down any evidence that I existed in her life at any point in time, but put back up (or unarchived) all of her pics she had with her ex before me. She used me as a rebound and caught feelings that she didn’t plan to catch, then blamed me and said I was the problem for “moving too fast” when I was just reciprocating the same energy she gave to me, only for her to start hitting up her ex again less than 2 weeks after dumping me. Truly shameful, emotionally immature, and frankly narcissistic behavior. I initially thought she was an avoidant, but now I’m starting to think she’s just a narcissist, posting all these things on her stories and such (again, my sister told me) about “freedom” and “growth” and all those cool buzz words, as if she dumped Jeffrey Dahmer when I can guarantee that no man has, or even will treat her as well as I did. She even told me that, again, like 3 days before she dumped me via text.
They’ll use an old excuse over and over. Ask you something and quickly accuse you of snapping at them your mad and they like to do this when they see you with a beer or around another female they’ll say your drunk or your being rude because of the other person
They want to be in control. No contact. Silence. No reaction. It's crazy driving to them because, although they will not admit it, it's reality showing them they're not in control at all.
Thank you so much he has devastated my whole life it’s been a whole year I left him June 12 of 23 and just four days ago he started his crap found me on TikTok and started commenting on mine and my new boyfriend’s pictures
So true. Cut off a narcissist, going on two months now. I know they want me to run to them, but my heels are firmly planted in the ground. Let them stew in their toxic juices. Mind games be damned....
They basically want and need people to chase them...NOT!!!Not only does it give them an ego boost but it gives them a fuel hit too... He can get it elsewhere from the ones he did me dirty with behind my back....This well has run dry, dismantled and removed over 5 yrs ago ✌️
She divorced me after 20 years together. As soon as I moved I blocked her everywhere. Its now been 10 months and I haven't said a word to her and she will never hear this voice ever! She has tried hoovering many times and I ignored them all, she; is disgusting to me and she belongs to the streets.
It's been 10 months for me too. 13 years of hell he tackled me down a staircase and broke my foot and tore my rotator cuff. I am now finally walking and have tons of physical therapy still to go. Just this past week he had been trying to contact me! The audacity! I lost my job, failed my school semester and fell behind on everything I worked my tail off for. So much physical pain I've been going through for almost a year, that's besides the emotional and financial pain. Even though I have so much to say! So much to scream to that monster! He will Never hear my voice again!!
They hate losing control. And get very insecure because they think they’re better than you. ‘Why aren’t you fawning over me? Don’t you know how better I am than you?’ Truly sick people.
Let's face it. Both the narcissist and sensitive person (empath) are both damaged, and looking outside of themselves for validation. The narcissist is in your life for one reason. For you to learn to heal from them, and their shenanigans. To learn to love yourself more than seeking their love and validation that you may not have gotten as a child. The difference between them and us, is we don't take advantage of them, but we can not ever find love and validation through them, as it not within them. The truth is they can never give it because those are the very things that they lack, but seek to control you, and feed off of your resources, such as time, money, property, making them look good, feeding off of the emotional pain that they cause, etc.) 😊❤😊 The journey to healing is an inward journey of self love and validation, and cutting the cancer of the brokeness they create. You don't have to hate them, you have to understand the principles of how they operate so you don't get bamboozled again, or you'll have to repeat the lesson either with them, or someone just like them.😊
Watching them spring their own trap is kinda rewarding. I know my ex is feeling the loss. It makes me feel good to know that I have created freedom through no contact. knowing that they need to get out of the trap is truly the turning of tables in their own game.
Don’t be happy if they feel sad even if they abused. They are miserable and you can really love they will suffer for ever. The more I learn about them the more I’m sad for them they are empty and constant have voices in their heads destroying their egos
@@jenj3299 i didn’t have the same experience. I’m a sigma empath so since the beginning I destroyed the girl without knowing so I now I feel bad knowing she will be miserable forever. I’m also catholic so I’m trying to love everyone. But I understand and respect your hate for them they are monsters
@@AgernonTheUnfair this ie where forgiveness works both ways meaning forgive yourself.. no you can not possibly ever make them happy or remove their suffering, it's not your fault and nothing you can do about it so no need for any guilt or blame instead forgive them out of pity and forgive yourself enough to forget their fake persona they made to connect with you and abuse you so that you can be free truly without guilt or pain and knowing you did nothing. The old saying goes if you truly love them let them go. If you truly love you then don't blame a disorder or trail of others onto yourself you can not help or fix everyone or their disorder or abuse or be accountable for any sins another commits. You still need to heal friend. Once you truly heal you will forgive them but also forgive yourself enough not to feel any guilt, remorse, bad feelings for their pain as it is not in your power nor are you a God. Only a God or they themselves can fix this not you. You need to focus on healing, self love and self care.
No contact also creates this whole landslide effect with the new partner- all of their crap that was directed on you now has nowhere to go except to the new supply. It’s a beautiful thing. They just don’t ever get it. My ex has a string of women who absolutely hate him.
I said this the other day. The new supply often times forgets that once they’re involved with a narcissist and you’ve been discarded, there old position opens up and needs to be filled. Played both sides to get fcuked in the middle 😂😂😂
They lack self control, they are co dependent i believe. Being a person who can cut ties and disappear infuriates them and it shows who the stronger person is. 💪 and whos really in control when shi hits the fan
I'm definitely not a weak person and I got duped. I even wondered why I put up w the push pull from her; something I would have never put up w before. However, the love bombing and infatuation phases are so strong. I've NEVER chased women, and even I did a but of chasing during the push stages. They're good at what they do. I was done before the final discard, so jokes on her lol
There‘s no bigger satisfaction than knowing I didn‘t fall into the final trap: Blocking me after the discard and me not contacting him/giving him a reaction to that. 3 months into no contact and he‘s 99% out of my system.
I am very grateful for the education that I am getting , answers to what was going on in my so called relationship that I was in. I had to learn all the terms of narcissistic behavior and abuse.
This only works if they haven't found sufficient supply elsewhere, which for women especially, is easy. But, you must tell them goodbye and no contact regardless. As hard as it is, you have to let go of the delusion that they still care and will come back. They don't, and they won't - they've already erased it or replaced it. Probably long before they left. You have to accept this.
@@danielj233 Just to see if they can get you back (control) any time they want or if their current supply runs out. You and all of their other past connections are their backup supply.
Absolutely he thought he was the most clever person on the planet, often bragging about his high IQ and comparing himself to myself & others while his personal life was a disaster.. trying to convince me that all my many flaws were to blame for the sudden and abrupt breakup ( discard) , which occurred a week after his bday when I surprised him with a plane ticket to finally visit his family , we held hands kissed and he told me many times he loved me and that it was such a big deal that I’d done that . I told him that after 5 years together I was ready to move towards us being married as we’d been discussing before our planned trip to meet his family together , this all happened two weeks before my birthday. I’ve since learned that narcissist like to devastate people who love them by blowing up important events. My ex got a three in one 😣 I got up quietly picked up my coffee cup, thanked him for the coffee and left the cafe with my head held high and not a single tear. He looked confused and stared at a spot on the floor as I walked away. ( not the response he expected from me) 😌
If i took my attention away from the narcissist and talked to other people the narcissist would always come over and take over. Then act surprised when i was leaving.
I isolated myself due to my CPTSD and then the narc and his friends gang stalked me. All while smearing my name to my friends. No one ever asked me about my point of view on the subject, just watched me like a freak, like it was my fault- even though his behavior was like psychotic torture.
I have come to the conclusion that I will never get closure. After a while you just kind of stop asking and give up hope that you will ever know. I don’t think questioning what you supposedly did ever really goes away. Even knowing about NPD doesn’t really answer the lingering questions. It’s normal to wonder and to question what happened.
they turn everybody against you (behind your back) but they have been having affairs etc.they make up stories to justify their actions.but when you dont bother or talk , they try to make you jelouse or get others to ask questions etc.they love gossip and creatiing it
Very powerful stuff Joe, thank you so much for such deep and accurate insight. This is very timely for me and believe me your work is saving lives. God bless you brother. Much love from Sydney, Australia ✝️🙏
I always see really negative comments towards narcissists. I've just recently discovered that I am a vulnerable/covert narcissist. I severely damaged an ex-partner due to drug addiction, which I blamed on everyone else and the addiction itself rather than taking accountability. I was incapable of feeling empathy towards anyone who was affected by my addiction, like I feel like I honestly can't put myself in other people's shoes. I didn't even realise it at the time, but I'd use silent treatment when things angered or offended my weak sense of self. I basically just tick all the boxes of covert-narcissism, and honestly, it's pretty painful to realise what I was doing to people while simultaneously realising that at the time I had zero idea what i was doing, it was all subconscious. I feel like a damaged person. I haven't dated since that ex in 2018 out of fear of doing the same thing to somebody else. I've always been highly introverted. I thought I was very introspective but I obviously wasn't because my behaviour went unchecked for years. I just want people to know that there are some self-aware narcissists who understand how poisonous they are. I feel a lot of guilt about the way I've acted.
I really needed this right now, thank you Joe, your videos help people immensely. After 1 month of NC, he appeared back saying he was worried for my health (he also has a new supply). I answered him very cold and brief. He is relieved and keeps being kind and considerate, but it triggers me that confusion and anxiety that I no longer want. I stop and keep with my healing journey.
I disagree , i am an empath & i am not dependant on any one , the narcissist are the ones that are codependents on others , they are the ones that jumps from one relationship to the other , without ending the last , so i disagree with what you say about empaths , empaths dont depend on others for they security blankets , thats a lie , i left 12 years ago & never went back , neither looked back after my divorce from him , he's the one that wanted to come back to me , he went as far as sending one of his flying monkeys to " Collect Me Up !! " , i didnt go & never returned to him , he was the weak one , not me
What do you do when you just can’t leave because of illness an financial dependence? I moved from Europe to the US to advance his career. We lived in 5 different states and 15 different houses and/or apartments to advance his career. I took care off EVERYTHING! I didn’t work outside the home and catered to his every need so he could advance his career. Now that he is retired he just ignores me. He is so cruel!!
You are so on point in your explanation. I'm dealing with someone like this. He was so confused when I no longer cared for his attention, and I moved on.
I told mine I felt like a 7/11…always there for your convenience. Never there when I needed them. Sad how stupidly I got duped. Fantastic play of events going back taking everything you said as experience. Big’ole thank you.
The narc thinks you'll never leave because of their inflated ego and sense of self. They are delusional and feel they know just what to do to trick ppl into staying with them because it's what's worked for them so many times. And when they see you've moved on that ego still tells them they can get you back. Like a whole game. As long as they can keep you believing in the confidant inflated mask, the ego is safe. But if you can see through that, they know you'll discover that they're really pieces of 💩 and hate themselves. And they do not want that at all costs. They want you to believe in them. The hoover is to check and see if you still believe in the mask. They'll check from time to time to see if you still believe in their false self. But once you realize 100 percent without a shadow of a doubt who that real person actually is, you'll no longer want them near you and they'll know it.
Yes, this completely describes my familys experience with my husband's adoptive father. There was this cycle of abuse and pretend reconciliation. When we cut him off he went completely off the deep end and caused his own desstruction. Very sad and disturbing.
Yep. Unblocked after I went no contact.😅 I sent a message recently of acceptnce of it all thinking I was still blocked (he blocked when I tried to get confession/closure) So I deleted fast. I blocked him & all traces. Unless he hoovers me physically. Then its done for me... forever. ✌
I wrote a super long message recently getting out all of my feelings then I blocked them. I also did that to who turned out to be his gf and not just a friend like I thought because she's married. It was all online. I can't do the letter writing cathartic release stuff unless I can send it to the person. I feel so much better after doing that. I'm getting back to paying attention to things I enjoy and finding joy again. I miss him every so often. The relief I felt unexpectedly knowing I wouldn't have to talk to him again though was a good surprise because it made me feel like I really did make the right decision. I realized he was a serious energy vampire. I think the gf who I thought was a friend is a narcist and maybe projecting onto him. It's not my circus anymore so I try not to waste my time thinking about who could be what.
10 yrs I've wasted, had to finally walk away, 9 weeks and counting, no contact, but I'm still on edge, as she may show up at my house, and walk straight in, she's done it before , she ticked every box of a slimey covert Narsisist !
God bless you! It will be hard, but you’re doing the right thing and the only thing that will ever bring you peace and self-respect. ❤. You’re in my prayers!
I am 8 plus months no contact. I texted kind words texts twice, they ignored them. Now months later he started driving by with the radio blaring but no response from this girl.😂
They go after everybody but if they sense they cannot manipulate that particular person THEY want then they will move on to someone else who is easier to convince
Yes you express this very well! Also if your sensitive to other people's energy and you've been away from them for a whilst then somehow or other you communicate with them again you realise how toxic their energy is! Especially if you've been around good l loving people who's e nergy feels peaceful and makes you feel good. I stay well clear their energy makes you feel not peaceful and dogs up your mind ! They're so chaotic and I feel the hate coming from them quite easily now ! I can spot them a mile off ! Stay well clear !Don't be fooled by their being nice act trying to win you back. God Bless !✨💗✨🙏
Joe your work is amazing. I say it again and again. It would be super to get some life examples of such behaviour just at times to understand how to recognise various motivations or actions. You videos are lovely and poetic - wonderful as they are - don’t get me wrong. Just thinking it could be great to hear actual small gestures that shows narcissistic personality. Love and respect❤
Great content, can you do a video on when you dump the narc and they moves on to someone else but still wants to keep you in theìr lives, so they go back and forth between you and their new supply.
@rashidarowe7882 Why are you allowing this though? It should be a straight block and NO Contact. You staying in this shows the Narc you are okay with being used . He does not care for either of you, it’s the SUPPLY and CONTROL he is after, unfortunately you are letting him do it ❤
When I think about growing up and our family dynamics, I realize mental illness is real... I've been no contact for 20 years now... It's the best thing I've ever done for myself... Stay safe...🙏
Magnificent gratitude beautiful SOUL 🎉❤🎉❤🎉❤🎉❤I don't miss ANYTHING ABOUT THE CREAP, MOSTLY NOT BEING CRITIZED DAILY IS MY FAVORITE, BUT RECENTLY FOUND TURNING OFF THE PHONE FEELS VERY IMPOWERING 💖🌟😘GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE GOING THRU THIS ABUSIVE SITUATION 🎉❤🎉 I'M 42 YEARS SURVIVOR, U CAN BE FREE IN LOVE 2❤❤❤
This is our 3rd round. I did loads of research and been planning my revenge for months. Shes at ready to go phase now and every time i tell her i dont care, leave sooner than later, shes injured. its destroying her. meanwhile im working out, getting stuff done. she cant leave because i wont care.
I've been spoiled with gifts, massage, haircuts, love, affection and attention many times in the past. I'm very picky and love to spoil one special guy.
![NoCap - Maliboo [Official Music Video]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/FUV7E0QyniU/mqdefault.jpg)
ONE OF THE SADDEST THINGS IS THAT EVERY EMPATH I'VE MET HAS BEEN FORCED TO ENDURED UNIMAGINABLE CRUELTY AND SUFFERING THROUGHOUT MOST OF THEIR LIVES AT THE HANDS OF THOSE WHO CLAIMED TO LOVE THEM.
❤❤❤❤
Knock it off weirdo. Most people are shitty & it's not uncommon for others to have horror stories of meeting shitty people empath or not. Get a life
🥹🥹🥹
It makes me realize what the Bible explains about Jesus. Never lied,never committed one sin and he helped many people in his 33years of life”But he carried his cross and died for the bad of all sinners. We must guard our hearts and not let the evil from others to change us. Vengeance belongs to God. His punishment is way worse than we could give. We good people couldn’t live with the guilt of doing wrong “ Truly give it in prayer and watch God work!! It really really does work ONCE YOU truly let it go and trust Gods got this!!
I think alot of people use the word "I love you" to manipulate you at this point. We are called to discern fruit 🍓🍉 so I be lookin now 🧐
Very true
My narc shot himself in the foot. He discarded me 2 weeks ago by ending our 7 year marriage. He sat me down to talk to me and simply said 'i'm sorry to say this but let's go our separate ways' and his reasons were very vague, nothing sensible....I told him I respect his decision. The next day I started packing my stuff and he panicked and asked me not to make quick decisions 😂😂😂 I'm still packing away slowly planning my way out.
UPDATE > Hi everyone thank you for your kind comments. I just wanted to update everyone on my progress. I FINALLY MOVED OUT!!! I moved to a different city. I've levelled down in a big way in terms of standard of living/lifestyle. I've found my own little place, i'm job hunting and this past week has been the happiest I've been in a very, very long time so I say it's a big LEVEL UP!! Thanks again to all you kind hearts.
Be very careful! Any signs of physical abuse or even repressed anger get out fast! ❤
Call the cops and go… the first and only time my ex husband ever hit me was when we separated and I asked him to leave my new apartment I woke up 4 days later in the icu ….
@@shannonluck5066 thank you
It's me😂😮😊
Get the hell out!!
They always want the other person to feel like they did something wrong!! BINGO!!!!
Narc I know f'd up and wanted me to apologise
I gave my ex probably the most effort I’ve given anyone I’ve ever dated in my 32 years on this planet. She discarded me 72hrs after the best night we had in our entire relationship, gaslighting ME saying that I was making things too serious and moving too fast and such when I know for a fact it was mutual and her avoidant ass started to catch feelings and got scared so she ran for the hills. Or so I thought….
Come to find out that like a week into no contact, my sister creeped her Instagram (for the record, I actually did NOT ask my sister to do this and even voiced my displeasure in her doing so and sending me screen shots), and not only had she taken down any evidence that I existed in her life at any point in time, but put back up (or unarchived) all of her pics she had with her ex before me.
She used me as a rebound and caught feelings that she didn’t plan to catch, then blamed me and said I was the problem for “moving too fast” when I was just reciprocating the same energy she gave to me, only for her to start hitting up her ex again less than 2 weeks after dumping me. Truly shameful, emotionally immature, and frankly narcissistic behavior. I initially thought she was an avoidant, but now I’m starting to think she’s just a narcissist, posting all these things on her stories and such (again, my sister told me) about “freedom” and “growth” and all those cool buzz words, as if she dumped Jeffrey Dahmer when I can guarantee that no man has, or even will treat her as well as I did. She even told me that, again, like 3 days before she dumped me via text.
They’ll use an old excuse over and over. Ask you something and quickly accuse you of snapping at them your mad and they like to do this when they see you with a beer or around another female they’ll say your drunk or your being rude because of the other person
They want to be in control. No contact. Silence. No reaction. It's crazy driving to them because, although they will not admit it, it's reality showing them they're not in control at all.
1000 agree
Thank you so much he has devastated my whole life it’s been a whole year I left him June 12 of 23 and just four days ago he started his crap found me on TikTok and started commenting on mine and my new boyfriend’s pictures
@@lucindafalcon483 they're going to lurk.
They don't feel nothing! They don't care
Sometimes you don’t need closure 🎯
The best closure is closing the door and turning the page.
Best closure is living a life filled with happiness and peace. Don’t give the narcissist a thought. They don’t even deserve that.
So true. Cut off a narcissist, going on two months now. I know they want me to run to them, but my heels are firmly planted in the ground. Let them stew in their toxic juices. Mind games be damned....
Very well said.. firmly planted..
They basically want and need people to chase them...NOT!!!Not only does it give them an ego boost but it gives them a fuel hit too... He can get it elsewhere from the ones he did me dirty with behind my back....This well has run dry, dismantled and removed over 5 yrs ago ✌️
Once we close the door they are never getting back in 😊
Digging a hole for someone else but falling into it yourself is straight from the Bible!
Amen 🙏
Take the Bible outta school wham, chaos.
Ecclesiasticus 27:26 KJV: Whoso diggeth a pit shall fall therein: and he that setteth a trap shall be taken therein. 🙏📿
great memory you know your bible 💪
Very well said sir. Ecc. 27:26.
She divorced me after 20 years together. As soon as I moved I blocked her everywhere. Its now been 10 months and I haven't said a word to her and she will never hear this voice ever! She has tried hoovering many times and I ignored them all, she; is disgusting to me and she belongs to the streets.
Same here brother
They’re gross.
It’s hard to keep them from reaching me through all their flying monkeys
Same here. Stay gone it’s the only way
It's been 10 months for me too. 13 years of hell he tackled me down a staircase and broke my foot and tore my rotator cuff.
I am now finally walking and have tons of physical therapy still to go. Just this past week he had been trying to contact me! The audacity! I lost my job, failed my school semester and fell behind on everything I worked my tail off for.
So much physical pain I've been going through for almost a year, that's besides the emotional and financial pain. Even though I have so much to say! So much to scream to that monster! He will Never hear my voice again!!
They hate losing control. And get very insecure because they think they’re better than you. ‘Why aren’t you fawning over me? Don’t you know how better I am than you?’
Truly sick people.
Let's face it. Both the narcissist and sensitive person (empath) are both damaged, and looking outside of themselves for validation.
The narcissist is in your life for one reason. For you to learn to heal from them, and their shenanigans. To learn to love yourself more than seeking their love and validation that you may not have gotten as a child.
The difference between them and us, is we don't take advantage of them, but we can not ever find love and validation through them, as it not within them. The truth is they can never give it because those are the very things that they lack, but seek to control you, and feed off of your resources, such as time, money, property, making them look good, feeding off of the emotional pain that they cause, etc.) 😊❤😊
The journey to healing is an inward journey of self love and validation, and cutting the cancer of the brokeness they create. You don't have to hate them, you have to understand the principles of how they operate so you don't get bamboozled again, or you'll have to repeat the lesson either with them, or someone just like them.😊
100 % truth
🎯
An empath is just a codependent person
@@reneegardner2286 I'm an empath and I'm not codependant. I've been single for years!
@@reneegardner2286 I believe you mean narcissists which is why they are known for having multiple supplies.
Watching them spring their own trap is kinda rewarding. I know my ex is feeling the loss. It makes me feel good to know that I have created freedom through no contact. knowing that they need to get out of the trap is truly the turning of tables in their own game.
Don’t be happy if they feel sad even if they abused. They are miserable and you can really love they will suffer for ever. The more I learn about them the more I’m sad for them they are empty and constant have voices in their heads destroying their egos
Forgiveness sets you free. Forgive them to forget them to move on.
@@AgernonTheUnfair
Not our problem
@@jenj3299 i didn’t have the same experience. I’m a sigma empath so since the beginning I destroyed the girl without knowing so I now I feel bad knowing she will be miserable forever. I’m also catholic so I’m trying to love everyone. But I understand and respect your hate for them they are monsters
@@AgernonTheUnfair this ie where forgiveness works both ways meaning forgive yourself.. no you can not possibly ever make them happy or remove their suffering, it's not your fault and nothing you can do about it so no need for any guilt or blame instead forgive them out of pity and forgive yourself enough to forget their fake persona they made to connect with you and abuse you so that you can be free truly without guilt or pain and knowing you did nothing. The old saying goes if you truly love them let them go. If you truly love you then don't blame a disorder or trail of others onto yourself you can not help or fix everyone or their disorder or abuse or be accountable for any sins another commits. You still need to heal friend. Once you truly heal you will forgive them but also forgive yourself enough not to feel any guilt, remorse, bad feelings for their pain as it is not in your power nor are you a God. Only a God or they themselves can fix this not you. You need to focus on healing, self love and self care.
I blocked him, changed my number and moved across the country. Guess i’ll never know what he thinks lol!
Exactly like and old house,I don't live there anymore so what the new tenants do is not my business.
I did this too lol. I had to change numbers
Blocked and shut down my social media.
It irrelevant what he thinks
These creatures so destructive and pitiful. Thank you.
The cycle changes the runner becomes the chaser and the chaser becomes the runner it's a universal law
No contact also creates this whole landslide effect with the new partner- all of their crap that was directed on you now has nowhere to go except to the new supply. It’s a beautiful thing. They just don’t ever get it. My ex has a string of women who absolutely hate him.
I think this is one of the best reasons, especially if they have third partied you and are feeding off the increased supply of triangulation drama.
Spot on! Exactly 💯
I said this the other day. The new supply often times forgets that once they’re involved with a narcissist and you’ve been discarded, there old position opens up and needs to be filled. Played both sides to get fcuked in the middle 😂😂😂
My dad told me narcissists are similar to robots. No emotions , can’t converse , me Mr me it’s all about me not you. 😂❤hope this helps !
They lack self control, they are co dependent i believe. Being a person who can cut ties and disappear infuriates them and it shows who the stronger person is. 💪 and whos really in control when shi hits the fan
I couldn't give 2 effs about what they're feeling. What father abandon his child? I'll never forgive them and their karma are their children
Or what mother prevents the father from seeing them whilst poisoning them.
I'm definitely not a weak person and I got duped. I even wondered why I put up w the push pull from her; something I would have never put up w before. However, the love bombing and infatuation phases are so strong. I've NEVER chased women, and even I did a but of chasing during the push stages. They're good at what they do. I was done before the final discard, so jokes on her lol
No contact no feed back.
Only way to go !!!
There‘s no bigger satisfaction than knowing I didn‘t fall into the final trap: Blocking me after the discard and me not contacting him/giving him a reaction to that. 3 months into no contact and he‘s 99% out of my system.
Time heals, and every day is a win if you don't get sucked back in. Over the emotional rollercoaster. Way over it
I am very grateful for the education that I am getting , answers to what was going on in my so called relationship that I was in. I had to learn all the terms of narcissistic behavior and abuse.
This only works if they haven't found sufficient supply elsewhere, which for women especially, is easy. But, you must tell them goodbye and no contact regardless. As hard as it is, you have to let go of the delusion that they still care and will come back. They don't, and they won't - they've already erased it or replaced it. Probably long before they left. You have to accept this.
Then why do they still hoover if they replaced or erased. Let's be real. "Greed"
@@danielj233 Just to see if they can get you back (control) any time they want or if their current supply runs out. You and all of their other past connections are their backup supply.
This can also be a time when you need to be extra alert. Especially if they're married. Be Alert!! and watch for any triangulation.
Absolutely he thought he was the most clever person on the planet, often bragging about his high IQ and comparing himself to myself & others while his personal life was a disaster.. trying to convince me that all my many flaws were to blame for the sudden and abrupt breakup ( discard) , which occurred a week after his bday when I surprised him with a plane ticket to finally visit his family , we held hands kissed and he told me many times he loved me and that it was such a big deal that I’d done that . I told him that after 5 years together I was ready to move towards us being married as we’d been discussing before our planned trip to meet his family together , this all happened two weeks before my birthday. I’ve since learned that narcissist like to devastate people who love them by blowing up important events. My ex got a three in one 😣
I got up quietly picked up my coffee cup, thanked him for the coffee and left the cafe with my head held high and not a single tear. He looked confused and stared at a spot on the floor as I walked away. ( not the response he expected from me) 😌
I moved 3 states away, well over 600 miles, just to avoid
that very thing....Done..never
Look back, its how one Heals.
👁️
They do move on with us as a distance memory
I wish he would leave me alone… fool me once… Never again…😡💪🏽💃🏽❤️
All they’re doing is creating enemies with every whole that they keep digging for themselves. 🤷🏽♀️
I ran for my life over40 years ago and never looked back. I ALWAYS knew where he was. He died and now I can finally breathe.
So grateful to be out of that situation and have clarity Again within my life!!! 🙏
If i took my attention away from the narcissist and talked to other people the narcissist would always come over and take over. Then act surprised when i was leaving.
I isolated myself due to my CPTSD and then the narc and his friends gang stalked me. All while smearing my name to my friends. No one ever asked me about my point of view on the subject, just watched me like a freak, like it was my fault- even though his behavior was like psychotic torture.
I’m so sorry. Rebuild in silence and take as much time as you need ❤
They call you crazy when you finally see behind the mask
Timing is everything, I am at a crossroads with my aging narcissistic mother. I needed to hear these words exactly when I did. Thank you.
They are people users and will cut you loose when they don’t need you anymore.
💯
I have come to the conclusion that I will never get closure. After a while you just kind of stop asking and give up hope that you will ever know. I don’t think questioning what you supposedly did ever really goes away. Even knowing about NPD doesn’t really answer the lingering questions. It’s normal to wonder and to question what happened.
they turn everybody against you (behind your back) but they have been having affairs etc.they make up stories to justify their actions.but when you dont bother or talk , they try to make you jelouse or get others to ask questions etc.they love gossip and creatiing it
Very powerful stuff Joe, thank you so much for such deep and accurate insight. This is very timely for me and believe me your work is saving lives. God bless you brother. Much love from Sydney, Australia ✝️🙏
I always see really negative comments towards narcissists. I've just recently discovered that I am a vulnerable/covert narcissist. I severely damaged an ex-partner due to drug addiction, which I blamed on everyone else and the addiction itself rather than taking accountability. I was incapable of feeling empathy towards anyone who was affected by my addiction, like I feel like I honestly can't put myself in other people's shoes. I didn't even realise it at the time, but I'd use silent treatment when things angered or offended my weak sense of self. I basically just tick all the boxes of covert-narcissism, and honestly, it's pretty painful to realise what I was doing to people while simultaneously realising that at the time I had zero idea what i was doing, it was all subconscious.
I feel like a damaged person. I haven't dated since that ex in 2018 out of fear of doing the same thing to somebody else.
I've always been highly introverted. I thought I was very introspective but I obviously wasn't because my behaviour went unchecked for years. I just want people to know that there are some self-aware narcissists who understand how poisonous they are. I feel a lot of guilt about the way I've acted.
Go for therapy, learn a better way, forgive yourself & hold yourself to a higher standard
@@TJ_775 Great advice and that is what I try to do each day. Thank you.
I really needed this right now, thank you Joe, your videos help people immensely. After 1 month of NC, he appeared back saying he was worried for my health (he also has a new supply). I answered him very cold and brief. He is relieved and keeps being kind and considerate, but it triggers me that confusion and anxiety that I no longer want. I stop and keep with my healing journey.
I disagree , i am an empath & i am not dependant on any one , the narcissist are the ones that are codependents on others , they are the ones that jumps from one relationship to the other , without ending the last , so i disagree with what you say about empaths , empaths dont depend on others for they security blankets , thats a lie , i left 12 years ago & never went back , neither looked back after my divorce from him , he's the one that wanted to come back to me , he went as far as sending one of his flying monkeys to " Collect Me Up !! " , i didnt go & never returned to him , he was the weak one , not me
Agree 💯
The dog-cartoon is very cute!
They will ruin your reputation to save their own.
💯
You don’t need to explain anymore…Your absence is closure enough… for you not them
Even when they have a new supply!
What do you do when you just can’t leave because of illness an financial dependence? I moved from Europe to the US to advance his career. We lived in 5 different states and 15 different houses and/or apartments to advance his career. I took care off EVERYTHING! I didn’t work outside the home and catered to his every need so he could advance his career. Now that he is retired he just ignores me. He is so cruel!!
You are so on point in your explanation. I'm dealing with someone like this. He was so confused when I no longer cared for his attention, and I moved on.
when there isn't anyone left to hunt they have to bait you
Good morning Joe 🌞 thank you 🤗❤️ btw, the ones that you do outside are really good, i miss the birds 😆. Thank you 🤗
I had to get a restraining order
Just love all these videos Joe….keep em coming 😂….always a delight listening to you ❤️…..Thankyou ! 🙏🏻❤️
I told mine I felt like a 7/11…always there for your convenience. Never there when I needed them. Sad how stupidly I got duped. Fantastic play of events going back taking everything you said as experience. Big’ole thank you.
Can you do a video on why the narc thinks you will never leave them? And also one on what happens when the narc sees you moved on to someone else?
Adding to this, please do more on the narc always devaluing their main supply no matter how great the supply is: money, status, gullible, useful.
That's the whole reason why they treat you bad, because they don't think you'll leave. You get stuck in their cycle.
The narc thinks you'll never leave because of their inflated ego and sense of self. They are delusional and feel they know just what to do to trick ppl into staying with them because it's what's worked for them so many times. And when they see you've moved on that ego still tells them they can get you back. Like a whole game. As long as they can keep you believing in the confidant inflated mask, the ego is safe. But if you can see through that, they know you'll discover that they're really pieces of 💩 and hate themselves. And they do not want that at all costs. They want you to believe in them. The hoover is to check and see if you still believe in the mask. They'll check from time to time to see if you still believe in their false self. But once you realize 100 percent without a shadow of a doubt who that real person actually is, you'll no longer want them near you and they'll know it.
Good morning ! 🌞 New video and a cup of Joe with Joe !☕☕ Life is good ! 🤗❤
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂cute
Yes, this completely describes my familys experience with my husband's adoptive father. There was this cycle of abuse and pretend reconciliation. When we cut him off he went completely off the deep end and caused his own desstruction. Very sad and disturbing.
They sure do because they are never satisfied ❤
Your insight & voice are very comforting.
Thank you for this. I really needed to hear it and it actually brings me some peace.
Your words and the imagery were soothing. Thank you.
Yep. Unblocked after I went no contact.😅
I sent a message recently of acceptnce of it all thinking I was still blocked (he blocked when I tried to get confession/closure)
So I deleted fast.
I blocked him & all traces.
Unless he hoovers me physically.
Then its done for me... forever. ✌
ur videos somehow align with my real-life timeline...
I wrote a super long message recently getting out all of my feelings then I blocked them. I also did that to who turned out to be his gf and not just a friend like I thought because she's married. It was all online. I can't do the letter writing cathartic release stuff unless I can send it to the person. I feel so much better after doing that. I'm getting back to paying attention to things I enjoy and finding joy again. I miss him every so often.
The relief I felt unexpectedly knowing I wouldn't have to talk to him again though was a good surprise because it made me feel like I really did make the right decision. I realized he was a serious energy vampire. I think the gf who I thought was a friend is a narcist and maybe projecting onto him. It's not my circus anymore so I try not to waste my time thinking about who could be what.
Great morning @joebhouse Are you reading my mind? LoL This mornings message is perfect. I appreciate you 👨🏾🙏🏾
10 yrs I've wasted, had to finally walk away, 9 weeks and counting, no contact, but I'm still on edge, as she may show up at my house, and walk straight in, she's done it before , she ticked every box of a slimey covert Narsisist !
Another GREAT video Joe.
One thumbs up wasn't enough for this output. But two!! 🎉 Thank u.
God bless you! It will be hard, but you’re doing the right thing and the only thing that will ever bring you peace and self-respect. ❤. You’re in my prayers!
I just found Your channel and I love ❤You ! You are exactly right ! They will go Nuts when they lose control over You ! Thx so much !
I am 8 plus months no contact. I texted kind words texts twice, they ignored them. Now months later he started driving by with the radio blaring but no response from this girl.😂
They go after everybody but if they sense they cannot manipulate that particular person THEY want then they will move on to someone else who is easier to convince
Yes you express this very well! Also if your sensitive to other people's energy and you've been away from them for a whilst then somehow or other you communicate with them again you realise how toxic their energy is!
Especially if you've been around good l loving people who's e nergy feels peaceful and makes you feel good.
I stay well clear their energy makes you feel not peaceful and dogs up your mind !
They're so chaotic and I feel the hate coming from them quite easily now !
I can spot them a mile off ! Stay well clear !Don't be fooled by their being nice act trying to win you back. God Bless !✨💗✨🙏
What a lovely video. Thank you.
Joe your work is amazing. I say it again and again. It would be super to get some life examples of such behaviour just at times to understand how to recognise various motivations or actions. You videos are lovely and poetic - wonderful as they are - don’t get me wrong. Just thinking it could be great to hear actual small gestures that shows narcissistic personality. Love and respect❤
Good stuff. Thank you.
Excellent video! 👌🏻
Here we go again. My narcissist wants to leave town again but can’t financially without my help. Not gonna happen ever again!
I appreciate you for this video
Ex narcissist is in the poor house with his new supply. He brought her here from Cuba. She’s probably going through worse hell with him than I did.
Great content, can you do a video on when you dump the narc and they moves on to someone else but still wants to keep you in theìr lives, so they go back and forth between you and their new supply.
@rashidarowe7882 Why are you allowing this though? It should be a straight block and NO Contact. You staying in this shows the Narc you are okay with being used . He does not care for either of you, it’s the SUPPLY and CONTROL he is after, unfortunately you are letting him do it ❤
Ty 🕊️✨🙏🪽🫶
When I think about growing up and our family dynamics, I realize mental illness is real... I've been no contact for 20 years now... It's the best thing I've ever done for myself... Stay safe...🙏
I told him We're not compatible and he run away and get his own place😂
His 16-year-old new girlfriend tried to attack me.
He is a 50-year-old man....going after underage girls!
Magnificent gratitude beautiful SOUL 🎉❤🎉❤🎉❤🎉❤I don't miss ANYTHING ABOUT THE CREAP, MOSTLY NOT BEING CRITIZED DAILY IS MY FAVORITE, BUT RECENTLY FOUND TURNING OFF THE PHONE FEELS VERY IMPOWERING 💖🌟😘GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE GOING THRU THIS ABUSIVE SITUATION 🎉❤🎉 I'M 42 YEARS SURVIVOR, U CAN BE FREE IN LOVE 2❤❤❤
Ask them what they want and its guarenteed to be the oppsite to what you want.they force you to hate them.
Sometimes I think myself a doormat rather than an empath.
Me too 😢
Keep your head on a swivel and always follow Gods teachings above all and you will never go wrong.
Amen 🙏🏼
Your 💯 % correct
Great comment 🙏🏼✝️🕊️
Worst is when you cant go no contact because you have kids with them. I would love to go no contact
Great video! I told narc your hot and cold behavior AGAIN! I KNOW YOU. BLOCKED N DELETED. NO CONTACT
Thank you. I quit playing my part when i hung up from a 3 way shouting match
Walking on broken Glass ! 🙏
Ive been silent since sept 28 2023 and hes still blocked.
Mine told me, you used to be a nice person.
This is our 3rd round. I did loads of research and been planning my revenge for months. Shes at ready to go phase now and every time i tell her i dont care, leave sooner than later, shes injured. its destroying her. meanwhile im working out, getting stuff done. she cant leave because i wont care.
There is research that shows that those of us in this are not weak. We tend to have parents who had npd bpd and our inner child resonates
I've been spoiled with gifts, massage, haircuts, love, affection and attention many times in the past. I'm very picky and love to spoil one special guy.
The narrator sounds like Edward Norton. If so, good for a Hollywood actor becoming self aware.
I'm not a weak person I should never let it go on so long but ide never chase someone who wanted someone else instead of me