no one asked for my opinion but i just want to say thank you for being so careful about labeling your twitching as tics. as someone with tourette’s it has been INFURIATING watching people say they have tics when it’s someone stimming or just getting a shiver or twitching. genuinely, i appreciate the transparency of being careful around calling symptoms as tics.
as a fellow ts'er I was thinking the same thing :) muscle spasms are so so different from the whole process of experiencing a tic! not better or worse just different haha
I explained brain zaps to my doctor when we lowered my dosage because at the time I didn't hear anyone talk about it and he said that it wasn't normal and just scared me even more.😭 It's so nice to hear people talk about these things, thank you!
That's really irresponsible of your doctor because brain zaps are a very very well known and common symptom of mental health medication use/withdrawal. 🫂 sorry you had to experience that invalidation.
Hi honeys! As someone that also struggled with medication issues having an honest talk like this made me feel so seen! Thank you guys once again! ALSO OH MY GOD I LOVE THE LAVENDER BOWS ON THE HAIR I MIGHT COPY THAT
I started getting brain zaps as an anxiety symptom over the last few years and they are so alarming to experience I honestly though I had a brain tumor! I’m SO SORRY you had such a rough experience but I’m so glad you were able to get through it and are on the up and up
Brain zaps are sooo scary I've experienced that before!! Especially tied together with unstable thoughts/emotions. I had to go cold turkey from zoloft and it was awful. Thank you for sharing your experience I'm sure you're helping many people out there feel seen and less alone :)) P.S. You're awesome!!
Pixie, I’m so glad your doing better mentally and physically. Don’t listen to the toxic people, you coming out about your DID and mental issues must feel so great and your so brave! 🩷🩷🩷
I really appreciate all your refreshing candor on the topic of meds /gen I remember going off Effexor and onto Wellbutrin and the brain zaps, nausea and intense *un-aliving* thoughts were so so so so hard, but I am glad I made that change!!! This makes me feel less alone in that experience!! Med changes suck, but I am glad yall seem to be past the bad and its working all right now xoxoxo
Been having such a difficult time in my life right now, struggling with change and moving on etc and videos like this always help ground me, thank you so much for always being a comfort for me 💖
as someone who’s experienced medicinal withdrawal multiple times off stuff like lexapro (fluctuating financial situations, etc) and has been hospitalized for it, watching you say all the stuff it felt like made me feel like i have been much less of a baby every time. it’s really not something you can explain well or understand fully until you go through it. thanks y’all. also wellbutrin buddies!!!
Sorry this isn't related to the video topic but I HAVE to say it, your eye makeup looks absolutely gorgeous in this video 🤩 I don't know what it is but your eyeliner is perfect and your eyelashes are gorgeous but that eyeshadow is so so pretty, that really soft purple is so beautiful and it's blended so nicely I literally could Not stop staring through the whole video🥹
I love watching your mental health videos, I feel like my entire life and personality revolve around how fucked up my brain is and how it affects other people, and idk- when you show your video diaries, it's like I'm looking in a mirror. Thanks for being there for us cluster b/did/ptsd baddies, bestie ✨️💗✨️
I really appreciate you and I look forward to all your videos. They really make my day and provide company in my time of loneliness. I have BPD and there are many moments I feel extremely lonely. However, watching your vlogs provide warmth in my moments of sadness. Thank you Pixie!
Psych meds are no joke. I have ADHD and anxiety and I started a non-stimulant med Strattera for it and it effed me up BAD. Talking SI, chest pain, tachycardia, derealization, panic attacks, sleeping all the time, it was terrible. Symptoms were even worse if I missed a dose. Some nights I'd call my parents at like 2am freaking out because I thought I was going to die because I felt my heart pounding and kept asking if I was dead bc I didn't feel like I was a real living person. I didn't last long on that med. Wellbutrin made me anxious all the time. Now I'm back on ole reliable Zoloft so I can at least not panic all the time. I'm a nurse so I know how psych meds work, idk why my doctor keeps taking me off something that works and trying something new because I can take two meds at the same time as long as they're compatible. I need the energy from an ADHD med but also not the panic attacks that come with it. I'm still hesitant to see psych because of bad experiences as a teenager, but I think I need my regular doc to stop managing it because nothing is giving me the feelings I need 😢
I still can't believe I was put on an EXTREMELY high dose of Seroquel at thirteen. I was suicidal and depressed, but I can't even begin to fathom how much that might have hurt me being so young on such a high high dosage. I'm on different medications now, but jeez. I wasn't experiencing psychosis, just CPTSD, suicidal ideation, depression, anxiety and dissociation. It's good to hear you went through something similar (though I'm sorry you did!!!) because sometimes I feel so alone since I don't know anyone else who was on Seroquel.
honestly taking long term and also acute emergency antipsychotics has saved my life many times (even as someone without any diagnoses of psychosis, but other diagnoses that can greatly disturb my mental health and behaviour) so it’s amazing for me but … I can’t even tell you how proud I am of you for getting through the withdrawal to figure out what’s best for you. there have been a couple times where they weren’t able to organise my seroquel in time so I withdrew for only three days, and that was already torture. so you are basically just an absolute soldier and I’m very proud of you
Personally never took anything other than Sertralin(e), and I have been immensely lucky that it's always worked for me ever since I started taking it. It's unfortunately common for people to think of meds as negative. And yeah, I can understand that antipsychotic medication can make you feel super weird about your perception and identity and a lot of drugs can be hit or miss. Thanks for talking about this, Pixie system/whoever was involved in the making of this video. It's such a vulnerable topic, and I have a lot of respect for y'all for talking about it.
i have a lot of similar mental health problems and im starting an antidepressant tomorrow, so this vid has me so psyched! (/pos) its wild how much our journeys are similar. you make me feel like i'm not alone! it annoys me when people who wouldnt criticize someone for taking medication for a broken bone will criticize you for taking medication for mental health. the brain is an organ just like your heart, stomach, etc and it deserves treatment just like every other illness. plus its true that the psychiatric industry has problems, but so does every other one! the food in the store is full of damaging and untested additives, but i still have to eat what's accessible to me. medical treatment is the same way. i will do the best with the flawed system instead of just sentencing myself to death, which is the alternative to seeking treatment.
At one point I was anti medication mostly out of fear and feeling a loss of control in my life When I did find the right med though my life got so much better I'm starting to feel happier and I'm growing out my hair again trying to find my new self and be the healthiest I can be
i’m so happy for y’all !! the right medication can really unlock so much in life. i’ve had a couple friends say i’m different on and off my meds, but the ones who really know me well say they can’t tell the difference, and that rly makes me happy. i’m still my fabulous self, just more functional and happy!
@@plushdragonteddy That's a great thing! I'm happy for you. In my case my identity has never really been able to find stability because of feeling unsafe, anxious, or depressed. So I'm still finding myself🙂
@@EthicalMyths i totally understand that. i hope you find the stability & safety you need 💖 neither of us may know who you are, but for what it’s worth, whoever you are seems really cool :)
The validation I feel about the "i must run away" feeling. It doesn't happens has much now that I'm older and medicated, but something if I'm really activated PTSD wise my brain goes into a small place and just keeps going "I want to go away" over and over. Or "I want to go home" b word YOU ARE HOME. I realize that, for me at least, It's my brain wanting out of it's state but that's not something you can magic away. Also I went from someone who never sweats TO SWEATY MCSWEATY ALWAYS THIRSTY FOR WATER WHYYYY? Thank you for being real about that, feel less alone. I'm glad it was worth the hard days, and I hope you keep finding things that make your life better!
i totally know what u mean when u say the side effects were worth it; i can’t imagine what it must b like to go thru all that, but i’m So Much more able to function & feel calm and happy and productive when i’m on my meds, and i have to imagine i’d be willing to endure a lot in order to get these benefits. like obviously not if it was permanent, but my ADHD literally gave me social anxiety, and my meds helped me almost entirely kick social anxiety’s ass to the curb !! the feeling of security i get in social situations alone (not to mention all the other benefits) is enough for me to b willing to go thru a lot, but i’m glad i didn’t have to. i’m excited for ur new life after this !!
I'm so happy that you fought through getting off of antipsychotics. I was put on antipsychotics when I was 15 and I ended up having to quit cold turkey, it was horrible, I couldn't even move my eyes without feeling motion sick, I had chills 24/7, could barely eat or drink, for a month. I lost so much weight but after I was off and it was completely out of me I felt so light and happy
This was such a reassuring video. I'm heading back to the doctors to try medication again soon and have been too nervous to go but this helped my confidence a lot. Hope you are all having a comfy cosy November!
Thank you for sharing your experience, and for talking about how evolving understanding of your own mental health can create changes in the medication you're prescribed. I've been up and down with meds for the past several years, but I can wholeheartedly say that the correct ones work really really well! Just...getting there can be a nightmare.
thank you for sharing this, it's going to help so many people feel less alone and feel hope that they will feel better eventually!! i went through similar side effects when trying to lower my dose of sertraline and i couldn't handle it so i went back up to my original dose. but i did add wellbutrin after that and i absolutely love wellbutrin.
Thank you you all for being here with us sharing your struggles because it has helped me feel less alone in similar struggles; needing constant distraction to avoid my dark thoughts. ❤️
I recently was hospitalized due to anti-psychotics and how bad they messed me up and coming off sucked so so bad. This made me feel less crazy because it is so hard
This video and the comments made me feel so seen! I'm currently on new meds for my anxiety and the symptoms you described (hot sweats, cold flashes, weird skin sensations) are all too familiar. Our brains just get grumpy when things are changing! I'm talking with my doc this week and probably going to try another medication instead, the side effects are just too intense for me, hah. I'm glad to see you doing so well Pixie :) It's very encouraging!!
I also had a hell of a time getting off seroquel nearly 2 years ago after being on it for 2 years. It was awful but I’m so glad that I got through it. Hugs!
Wait OMG Brain Zaps!! I've had them for years. Usually have them when I'm late on my meds. I call them "zoom zooms" or "buzzz buzzz". Thank you so much for this video. We used to take antipsychotics, and both on them and their withdrawal were horrible. I hope you feel better everyday now!
Thank you for making this video! I am so happy for you to have been able to get trough this change in meds. One thing I relate to you is the muscle twitches! omg when I had my allergic reaction to paroxetine I went from shaking uncontrollably to having weird muscle spasm in my fingers and legs for about two weeks. Even the brain zaps during the first few days I took it, such a weird reaction! I hope this new medication works well for you, your mental health journey is so intresting and at the same time so inspiring, thank you for sharing!
Hi! I'm 42 and love wearing pastel cute things. Just found your channel, and you look great. I have disassociative problems, including voices and hallucinations. Also, other mental health problems. Just come off anti psychotic meds. I also have autism etc. Well done, yes, meds really can work. I'm on anti depression and anti anxiety meds. Keep up the good work x
Med changes can be scary, figuring out what works to get your life together and "your head on straight" is a difficult process, and so individual, even without medication in the picture. I'm wishing the whole Pixie system well, and appreciate your candor and openness in how y'all are navigating your experience! 🌈 ✨ 💖
Proud of all of you working through the whole weaning and withdrawal phase, even if it sucks! I know that very well! I was on anti-psychotics for 8.5 years for C-PTSD, Seroquel and Wellbutrin included of the meds you mentioned. They said they put me on Seroquel for sleep to prevent nightmares (which did work, but yeah, my whole mood and affect were severely dampened.) I'm surprised I was still able to function to some degree. Throughout those years, I was on Seroquel all that time, but the other two meds swapped out off and on until they found something that worked. Funnily enough, Seroquel, I had no issue getting off of. The one I did have severe withdrawal symptoms from was Cymbalta. I was sick as a dog for a month straight, with every flu-like symptom under the sun, including teeth and jaw pain. It felt like I was dying! But, I am happy to have weaned off of everything completely in the end. The struggle was absolutely worth it! 😄
I know I'm late to the party but damn has this video given me a lot to think about. I'm currently on both Welbutrin and Seroquel (morning and night respectively). I was prescribed seroquel for short term use originally, to help with chronic insomnia and the near daily night terrors I was having when i eventually fell asleep for a couple hours, and my dr decided to keep it long term, so I've been on it for about 5 years now, with no plans to go off of it for a while yet, I still have plenty to work through in therapy before i consider it. But I'm surprised Ive never heard about these killer seroquel withdrawals before, and while it's a bit alarming I really appreciate you being open with your experience. I feel a bit more informed and prepared for that experience when it comes down the line. Thank you for always being so transparent with your audience, despite the negativity it sometimes brings to you. 💜💙
the way you describe brain zaps is SO REAL i got them coming off of viibryd and it IS like you’re falling but just for a second but it feels terrifying in that moment
This video made me feel less alone ❤ I’ve never been on antipsychotics, but I have BPD and recently went through a year of repeated highly traumatizing events due to an abusive partner. I’m starting to feel better more consistently now but I really know what it’s like to feel afraid of your own brain and your own thoughts. I couldn’t be alone. I struggle to shower. I can’t do anything in quiet. I’ve experienced being completely out of control of my emotions and hospitalized, a few months ago. And I also am obsessed with surrounding myself in cute stuff. I just try to keep going
Hi Pixie!!!! I’ve suffered with medication anxiety for pretty much my whole life so its so interesting to see such a bright and positive attitude towards it! I love that you’ve found something that works for you and i hope it continues to make your life more peaceful and enjoyable!! ❤️🖤❤️✨
I can relate to this with pain medication actually! I did stop mental health medications years ago cold turkey (I know that's not recommended) and found that easy and relieving. But pain medications was the first time I had empathy for withdrawals. It was utterly horrific.
Wowow! I relate, I’m currently weening off anti depressants becasue I finally realised I’ve lost like 5 years of my life to the horrible side effects - they just become a normalised part of your life. Also forgetting to take them for 4 days and experiencing thaaaat idiation was not cute fun or fresh. I wish you well on this journey pixie! ♡
wow i completely understand the medications you were taking. I was on zoloft for the longest time. i started when i was in 5th grade to almost 12th grade. i hated it. by the time i got in my early adulthood it was enough for me. i finally got on the right medication and i feel so much better. im glad your doing so much better.
This kinda videos make me feel seen and not crazy, I don't have the same issues but I'm having a bad time, and I feel like I need to change my pills, and I've been so down lately. Videos like this are a blessing. ❤
oh my god wellbutrin is the only thing that manages to keep me awake during the day, i tried so many medications and always just had TERRIBLE side effects and nothing did anything for me before that, i'm so glad i found it honestly
I can always tell I’m dealing with a lot of stress when I have the same stress dream over and over. It always involves me being in a performance and either I can remember my lines or the choreography, I can’t find my costume, I’m late to go on stage, or I missed warmups.
Pixie, I’m so sorry about everything you’ve been dealing with for the last couple years. I hope you find more peace and healing on the other side of each challenge you face & become more confident & comfortable with yourself. I can’t help but notice the difference in you before and after the “new face & new pronouns” video & I get the sense you’re really going through it. I keep going back & watching your old videos, like your Japan vlogs, & still love your bubbly & sweet personality. 💖 Also, your rainbow aesthetic has always given me a huge serotonin boost, so thank you for that.
Right medication its a relief. If you think your doctor dont listen to you , that dont pay attention to you, go to another one, dont give up on therapy. It saved my life. I'm getting better and doing all I can to get better. The process is slow but it s still process . I learn to have patience with my self
I’m too scared to get off my antidepressants, but my ass needs to stay medicated. I’m so glad you are mindful and open minded to different things to help yourself.
Hi Pixie System! Thank you for being so honest about this topic. Medication, especially antipsychotics, are still so widely criticized and misunderstood. You made something really useful here, I feel. Best wishes for continued progress on your health journey ❤️😄
I recently came off anti-depressants I’d been on for 6 years. I had brain zaps and a lot of the other symptoms you mentioned, it was a really difficult couple of months, but worth it in the end!
Thanks for sharing ♥️ Side note that while Citalopram is an anti-depressant (SSRI), it's usually prescribed for anxiety disorders because it's mostly effective for that!
Switching my antidepressants gave me a solid month of feeling like an absolutely monstrous person; so irritable, so angry, every feeling was Too Much. It was worth changing, the new meds work so much more, but god it was hard. I hope your switch is as kind to you all as it can be.
Omg I went off Lexapro one time and it was the WORST. I was seriously having flu symptoms for weeks. I also ran out of Trileptal for bipolar for a few days and just that alone was enough for me to have crying spells and flu symptoms for days. I definitely feel for you. Withdrawal is not a joke!
I take Quetiapine for non psychosis reasons for many years and lately I have been wondering if I should change my meds. Thank you for a realistic look into what that will be like 💖
It works for many people with different symptoms!! Just for me particularly we thought we were treating one thing when it was actually another 💗 Best of luck to u 🥺🌈💕
I’ve had many brain zaps happen to me if I forget to take my lexapro, or couldn’t get it refilled in time and damn are they gnarly oof. Also you kinda pushed me into going back to my clinic’s psychiatrist to talk about different meds bc the ones I’ve been on for years are uh, not working. Much love to you and your system!💖
Sooo, my doctor straight up said that Seroquel wouldn't be "dangerous" and wouldn't be too bad to get off of of I ever needed to, and I thought that sounded sus at the time, and now you've confirmed I was right. It may not be dangerous sure, but clearly it's not an easy time! Oof. I am curious how much your dosage was, as I'm only on 40mg, 2 years in. And I'm not planning on going off it anytime soon, but thank you so much for sharing this!! Now I know what to prepare my self for!❤
I came of antidepressants a month ago and I felt so physically ill. I got waves of nausea and my heart was pounding. I also cried a lot more, but I felt like I returned to the person I was before medication. So the medication really did something. But yeah so relieved it’s over and I have a new one which should have less withdrawal effects for someone who is forgetful with taking meds😅 Edit: The previours medication made me also so sweaty!
You look stunning, as usual! 🌺 I haven't seen your videos in a while, they haven't been coming up in my feed. I'm glad to see you again. Sending good energy and healing vibes through your medical journey 💕
I was on a lower dose of quetiapine for anxiety and sleep problems. I also had a feeling of like sudden realisation about how they made me feel after I came off of them. It was like "oh, I can string a full sentence of words back together again and I've stopped having all those weird side effects. Maybe I do feel much better when I'm not taking them" lol.
I don’t think I’ve gone without listening and watching something in years both for my thoughts and to distract so I don’t fall into depersonalization or derealization more than just a veil
I'm currently wanting to get off my seroquel but if I don't take it, I have intense insomnia. I also get nightmares while taking it as well. I really don't want to be dependent on it anymore, but I'm scared of not sleeping for a week.
Just went through the worst few weeks ever after a hard stop on Effexor. 😞 So many symptoms I've never had before. Wishing you all the best!! ⭐️ Having the guts to go through the medication change process is very kewl.
I didn’t know it made you more sweaty that would explain why I was sooooo sweaty at work this summer and when I started going back to the gym omg so much sweaty
I’m being weaned off Klonopin (it’s a stronger version of Ativan for anyone wondering and it’s such a great sedative like I knew going into it my sleep will never be the same) and I can’t stress enough how much of a PHYSICAL effect it has on a person. I’m just getting used to 1.5 mg because the brain zaps and brain fog were affecting my ability to focus/work. Luckily I 1. knew this was going to happen and 2. felt these side effects before and have a great support system, but it was agonizing even though I wasn’t nervous at all.
I know medication works for some people but not everyone and I am one who do not trust it after I was put on the wrong medications three different times and two of those times landed me in the emergency room twice. I do take some cheap anxiety and stress gummies and sometimes the pills from Walmart because I can not work clearly without it. The older I get the worse my anxiety and stress has been and I get depressed and have suicidal thoughts/tendencies so I just try to take it one day at a time. I have a lot of mental health issues so I’m scared of anything I can not control and people in general scares me to death. I feel like sometimes someone is talking about me or hates me because of different types of traumas I been through.
I understand you said that you respect people who don't like medication to be understanding of all people but I don't think I do respect people who think that medication isn't helpful. You can say you've found your own cure but there is so much evidence that medication has helped people that when people say "It won't work you need meditation instead" I feel like they must know that there's a high chance they're hurting the person they're advising and are probably doing it to feel in control of other people's lives.
Bruh to straight villianize others for having different opinions... lmfao but nah yeah they must be malicious for having different thoughts feelings and opinions 👍
I think it’s fine to believe medication isn’t the best choice for someone that you know very well. For example, my partner and I discuss medication choices with each other, and weigh the pros and cons together. I think it can helpful to have someone else (WHO KNOWS YOU WELL) to tell you they think a medication might not be helpful or might not be worth the side effects. But once you’ve made that choice or discussed it with them, I agree it’s not okay to keep badgering them about it or judging them for it. And I think it’s not okay to assume you know what’s best for someone unless you are intimately close with them.
@@eliontheinternet3298 @eliontheinternet3298 I think that's definitely fine if you've seen how someone reacts to something and are giving your experiences with them as evidence for them to think through on whether they continue taking meds. It's just when people speak outright like they KNOW meds won't work for anyone and especially if they say it to people they don't know online but even when they say it before someone's had a chance to try underneath a doctor's care.
I was on Effexor and Effexor only for YEARS. It made me feel like such a zombie, and it would make me so sick if I missed a single dose, migraines, nausea, etc. The first doctor I had after I moved out of my parents house took me off it cold turkey (why did she do that? No one knows.) and it caused withdrawal symptoms that were so bad that I missed a week of work. I am now on about 6 medications that help different parts of my mental illness makeup, and I feel so so much better. They don't have me feeling so sick if I miss a single dose either. It's just so funny to me how that one single pill made me feel so awful for years, but the amount I'm on today make me feel like an actual human being! I have been through so many different medicines, but I will always still be pro-medicine (even though I know it isn't for everyone!), and beyond grateful that I have the resources to get them, as well as help to adjust them if need be. Sorry if this was ramble-y lol!
19:55 yes I had mild ticks before going on Wellbutrin and they are still mild but occur daily now instead of weekly. Most people it goes away but it slightly (I DO MEAN SLIGHTLY) exasperated mine. I got face, limb, and neck/upper back spasms and after being off it for over a year now I just get the neck/upper back spasms a few times a day. I’ll take it because I’m alive 🎉 ☀️
Hello! You mentioned having to go to the ER if you don't have a primary care physician. I'm from the US, not CA, but over here when I was in that position I went to an urgent care. It was sort of in between an ER and a primary care. Lots of people with stuff that needed to be seen soon but that wasn't life threatening, and a few people like me waiting to have prescriptions filled or talk about concerns that they would normally discuss with a PCP.
I live in the same place as pixie, there’s no urgent care, just the ER. There are like two after hours clinics but they’re impossible to get in to, and even if you do, if it’s urgent care level they’ll send you to the ER
ive been thinking of getting off quetiapine but im so scared of touching my meds, it was a good idea to scroll through tiktoks of folks going through it, im stealing the idea if it ever comes up lol. i also took welbutrin at some point but idk when or why we got off that. brains are stupid. :')
Seroquel isn't only for psychosis, it's also used to treat bipolar disorder, specifically b2 (hypomania - not full mania). I'm on Seroquel and Lexapro (Citalopram) for bipolar going on 7 years now.
![Seungmin "그렇게, 천천히, 우리(As we are)" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/kAzmhLHePqU/mqdefault.jpg)
no one asked for my opinion but i just want to say thank you for being so careful about labeling your twitching as tics. as someone with tourette’s it has been INFURIATING watching people say they have tics when it’s someone stimming or just getting a shiver or twitching. genuinely, i appreciate the transparency of being careful around calling symptoms as tics.
A million percent!!! 😭💗
as a fellow ts'er I was thinking the same thing :) muscle spasms are so so different from the whole process of experiencing a tic! not better or worse just different haha
I explained brain zaps to my doctor when we lowered my dosage because at the time I didn't hear anyone talk about it and he said that it wasn't normal and just scared me even more.😭 It's so nice to hear people talk about these things, thank you!
That's really irresponsible of your doctor because brain zaps are a very very well known and common symptom of mental health medication use/withdrawal. 🫂 sorry you had to experience that invalidation.
As someone whose on seroquel for Bipolar I'm always so sad when I hear about it being misprescribed. I'm so glad you're on a better medication now!!
The thumbnail is a profound slay and the Ebony Dark'ness reference made my day hahahah
i find it so funny that when i was in psychosis i thought i had did and while you were having did they thought you had psychosis lol
@woooogie672you literally just repeated that comment
Hi honeys!
As someone that also struggled with medication issues having an honest talk like this made me feel so seen! Thank you guys once again!
ALSO OH MY GOD I LOVE THE LAVENDER BOWS ON THE HAIR I MIGHT COPY THAT
I started getting brain zaps as an anxiety symptom over the last few years and they are so alarming to experience I honestly though I had a brain tumor! I’m SO SORRY you had such a rough experience but I’m so glad you were able to get through it and are on the up and up
Brain zaps are sooo scary I've experienced that before!! Especially tied together with unstable thoughts/emotions. I had to go cold turkey from zoloft and it was awful. Thank you for sharing your experience I'm sure you're helping many people out there feel seen and less alone :)) P.S. You're awesome!!
Pixie, I’m so glad your doing better mentally and physically. Don’t listen to the toxic people, you coming out about your DID and mental issues must feel so great and your so brave! 🩷🩷🩷
I really appreciate all your refreshing candor on the topic of meds /gen I remember going off Effexor and onto Wellbutrin and the brain zaps, nausea and intense *un-aliving* thoughts were so so so so hard, but I am glad I made that change!!! This makes me feel less alone in that experience!! Med changes suck, but I am glad yall seem to be past the bad and its working all right now xoxoxo
I've been through worse but I loathed the feeling of brain zaps, so glad changed meds.
Been having such a difficult time in my life right now, struggling with change and moving on etc and videos like this always help ground me, thank you so much for always being a comfort for me 💖
Having a really difficult time with meds and doctors right now, that k you for being so open with things like this
as someone who’s experienced medicinal withdrawal multiple times off stuff like lexapro (fluctuating financial situations, etc) and has been hospitalized for it, watching you say all the stuff it felt like made me feel like i have been much less of a baby every time. it’s really not something you can explain well or understand fully until you go through it. thanks y’all. also wellbutrin buddies!!!
Sorry this isn't related to the video topic but I HAVE to say it, your eye makeup looks absolutely gorgeous in this video 🤩 I don't know what it is but your eyeliner is perfect and your eyelashes are gorgeous but that eyeshadow is so so pretty, that really soft purple is so beautiful and it's blended so nicely I literally could Not stop staring through the whole video🥹
i’m honestly so glad u pointed this out bc i was mostly listening to this video while working on other stuff, and UR RIGHT THOSE LASHES ARE FIRE !!
literally!!!
I love watching your mental health videos, I feel like my entire life and personality revolve around how fucked up my brain is and how it affects other people, and idk- when you show your video diaries, it's like I'm looking in a mirror. Thanks for being there for us cluster b/did/ptsd baddies, bestie ✨️💗✨️
I really appreciate you and I look forward to all your videos. They really make my day and provide company in my time of loneliness. I have BPD and there are many moments I feel extremely lonely. However, watching your vlogs provide warmth in my moments of sadness. Thank you Pixie!
Psych meds are no joke. I have ADHD and anxiety and I started a non-stimulant med Strattera for it and it effed me up BAD. Talking SI, chest pain, tachycardia, derealization, panic attacks, sleeping all the time, it was terrible. Symptoms were even worse if I missed a dose. Some nights I'd call my parents at like 2am freaking out because I thought I was going to die because I felt my heart pounding and kept asking if I was dead bc I didn't feel like I was a real living person. I didn't last long on that med. Wellbutrin made me anxious all the time. Now I'm back on ole reliable Zoloft so I can at least not panic all the time. I'm a nurse so I know how psych meds work, idk why my doctor keeps taking me off something that works and trying something new because I can take two meds at the same time as long as they're compatible. I need the energy from an ADHD med but also not the panic attacks that come with it. I'm still hesitant to see psych because of bad experiences as a teenager, but I think I need my regular doc to stop managing it because nothing is giving me the feelings I need 😢
I still can't believe I was put on an EXTREMELY high dose of Seroquel at thirteen. I was suicidal and depressed, but I can't even begin to fathom how much that might have hurt me being so young on such a high high dosage. I'm on different medications now, but jeez. I wasn't experiencing psychosis, just CPTSD, suicidal ideation, depression, anxiety and dissociation. It's good to hear you went through something similar (though I'm sorry you did!!!) because sometimes I feel so alone since I don't know anyone else who was on Seroquel.
honestly taking long term and also acute emergency antipsychotics has saved my life many times (even as someone without any diagnoses of psychosis, but other diagnoses that can greatly disturb my mental health and behaviour) so it’s amazing for me but … I can’t even tell you how proud I am of you for getting through the withdrawal to figure out what’s best for you. there have been a couple times where they weren’t able to organise my seroquel in time so I withdrew for only three days, and that was already torture. so you are basically just an absolute soldier and I’m very proud of you
Personally never took anything other than Sertralin(e), and I have been immensely lucky that it's always worked for me ever since I started taking it. It's unfortunately common for people to think of meds as negative. And yeah, I can understand that antipsychotic medication can make you feel super weird about your perception and identity and a lot of drugs can be hit or miss.
Thanks for talking about this, Pixie system/whoever was involved in the making of this video. It's such a vulnerable topic, and I have a lot of respect for y'all for talking about it.
i have a lot of similar mental health problems and im starting an antidepressant tomorrow, so this vid has me so psyched! (/pos) its wild how much our journeys are similar. you make me feel like i'm not alone!
it annoys me when people who wouldnt criticize someone for taking medication for a broken bone will criticize you for taking medication for mental health. the brain is an organ just like your heart, stomach, etc and it deserves treatment just like every other illness. plus its true that the psychiatric industry has problems, but so does every other one! the food in the store is full of damaging and untested additives, but i still have to eat what's accessible to me. medical treatment is the same way. i will do the best with the flawed system instead of just sentencing myself to death, which is the alternative to seeking treatment.
Pixie wanting to run away from their own house, is like me when I have the feeling of wanting to go home but I am home 😭
At one point I was anti medication mostly out of fear and feeling a loss of control in my life
When I did find the right med though my life got so much better I'm starting to feel happier and I'm growing out my hair again trying to find my new self and be the healthiest I can be
i’m so happy for y’all !! the right medication can really unlock so much in life. i’ve had a couple friends say i’m different on and off my meds, but the ones who really know me well say they can’t tell the difference, and that rly makes me happy. i’m still my fabulous self, just more functional and happy!
@@plushdragonteddy That's a great thing! I'm happy for you.
In my case my identity has never really been able to find stability because of feeling unsafe, anxious, or depressed. So I'm still finding myself🙂
@@EthicalMyths i totally understand that. i hope you find the stability & safety you need 💖 neither of us may know who you are, but for what it’s worth, whoever you are seems really cool :)
@plushdragonteddy Thank you, that is greatly appreciated! 😁
The validation I feel about the "i must run away" feeling. It doesn't happens has much now that I'm older and medicated, but something if I'm really activated PTSD wise my brain goes into a small place and just keeps going "I want to go away" over and over. Or "I want to go home" b word YOU ARE HOME. I realize that, for me at least, It's my brain wanting out of it's state but that's not something you can magic away. Also I went from someone who never sweats TO SWEATY MCSWEATY ALWAYS THIRSTY FOR WATER WHYYYY? Thank you for being real about that, feel less alone. I'm glad it was worth the hard days, and I hope you keep finding things that make your life better!
i totally know what u mean when u say the side effects were worth it; i can’t imagine what it must b like to go thru all that, but i’m So Much more able to function & feel calm and happy and productive when i’m on my meds, and i have to imagine i’d be willing to endure a lot in order to get these benefits. like obviously not if it was permanent, but my ADHD literally gave me social anxiety, and my meds helped me almost entirely kick social anxiety’s ass to the curb !! the feeling of security i get in social situations alone (not to mention all the other benefits) is enough for me to b willing to go thru a lot, but i’m glad i didn’t have to. i’m excited for ur new life after this !!
I'm so happy that you fought through getting off of antipsychotics.
I was put on antipsychotics when I was 15 and I ended up having to quit cold turkey, it was horrible, I couldn't even move my eyes without feeling motion sick, I had chills 24/7, could barely eat or drink, for a month. I lost so much weight but after I was off and it was completely out of me I felt so light and happy
Rly nice to be able to see that even if your meds aren't perfect at a point in time, there is still adjustments to be made that can help.
This was such a reassuring video. I'm heading back to the doctors to try medication again soon and have been too nervous to go but this helped my confidence a lot. Hope you are all having a comfy cosy November!
Thank you for sharing your experience, and for talking about how evolving understanding of your own mental health can create changes in the medication you're prescribed. I've been up and down with meds for the past several years, but I can wholeheartedly say that the correct ones work really really well! Just...getting there can be a nightmare.
thank you for sharing this, it's going to help so many people feel less alone and feel hope that they will feel better eventually!! i went through similar side effects when trying to lower my dose of sertraline and i couldn't handle it so i went back up to my original dose. but i did add wellbutrin after that and i absolutely love wellbutrin.
Just started very curious to see how I relate as someone who went off anti psychs years ago love ya
Thank you you all for being here with us sharing your struggles because it has helped me feel less alone in similar struggles; needing constant distraction to avoid my dark thoughts. ❤️
I recently was hospitalized due to anti-psychotics and how bad they messed me up and coming off sucked so so bad. This made me feel less crazy because it is so hard
This video and the comments made me feel so seen! I'm currently on new meds for my anxiety and the symptoms you described (hot sweats, cold flashes, weird skin sensations) are all too familiar. Our brains just get grumpy when things are changing! I'm talking with my doc this week and probably going to try another medication instead, the side effects are just too intense for me, hah. I'm glad to see you doing so well Pixie :) It's very encouraging!!
I also had a hell of a time getting off seroquel nearly 2 years ago after being on it for 2 years. It was awful but I’m so glad that I got through it. Hugs!
Wait OMG Brain Zaps!! I've had them for years. Usually have them when I'm late on my meds. I call them "zoom zooms" or "buzzz buzzz". Thank you so much for this video.
We used to take antipsychotics, and both on them and their withdrawal were horrible. I hope you feel better everyday now!
Thank you for making this video! I am so happy for you to have been able to get trough this change in meds.
One thing I relate to you is the muscle twitches! omg when I had my allergic reaction to paroxetine I went from shaking uncontrollably to having weird muscle spasm in my fingers and legs for about two weeks. Even the brain zaps during the first few days I took it, such a weird reaction!
I hope this new medication works well for you, your mental health journey is so intresting and at the same time so inspiring, thank you for sharing!
Hi! I'm 42 and love wearing pastel cute things. Just found your channel, and you look great. I have disassociative problems, including voices and hallucinations. Also, other mental health problems. Just come off anti psychotic meds. I also have autism etc. Well done, yes, meds really can work. I'm on anti depression and anti anxiety meds. Keep up the good work x
This was a really insightful video and I enjoyed the honest talk, wishing you guys well as always!
As someone with a tic disorder, tics suck. So very glad they were just a temporary side effect for your sake
Med changes can be scary, figuring out what works to get your life together and "your head on straight" is a difficult process, and so individual, even without medication in the picture. I'm wishing the whole Pixie system well, and appreciate your candor and openness in how y'all are navigating your experience! 🌈 ✨ 💖
Proud of all of you working through the whole weaning and withdrawal phase, even if it sucks! I know that very well! I was on anti-psychotics for 8.5 years for C-PTSD, Seroquel and Wellbutrin included of the meds you mentioned. They said they put me on Seroquel for sleep to prevent nightmares (which did work, but yeah, my whole mood and affect were severely dampened.) I'm surprised I was still able to function to some degree. Throughout those years, I was on Seroquel all that time, but the other two meds swapped out off and on until they found something that worked. Funnily enough, Seroquel, I had no issue getting off of. The one I did have severe withdrawal symptoms from was Cymbalta. I was sick as a dog for a month straight, with every flu-like symptom under the sun, including teeth and jaw pain. It felt like I was dying! But, I am happy to have weaned off of everything completely in the end. The struggle was absolutely worth it! 😄
I know I'm late to the party but damn has this video given me a lot to think about. I'm currently on both Welbutrin and Seroquel (morning and night respectively). I was prescribed seroquel for short term use originally, to help with chronic insomnia and the near daily night terrors I was having when i eventually fell asleep for a couple hours, and my dr decided to keep it long term, so I've been on it for about 5 years now, with no plans to go off of it for a while yet, I still have plenty to work through in therapy before i consider it. But I'm surprised Ive never heard about these killer seroquel withdrawals before, and while it's a bit alarming I really appreciate you being open with your experience. I feel a bit more informed and prepared for that experience when it comes down the line. Thank you for always being so transparent with your audience, despite the negativity it sometimes brings to you. 💜💙
the way you describe brain zaps is SO REAL
i got them coming off of viibryd and it IS like you’re falling
but just for a second
but it feels terrifying in that moment
This video made me feel less alone ❤ I’ve never been on antipsychotics, but I have BPD and recently went through a year of repeated highly traumatizing events due to an abusive partner. I’m starting to feel better more consistently now but I really know what it’s like to feel afraid of your own brain and your own thoughts. I couldn’t be alone. I struggle to shower. I can’t do anything in quiet. I’ve experienced being completely out of control of my emotions and hospitalized, a few months ago. And I also am obsessed with surrounding myself in cute stuff. I just try to keep going
i won’t go into much detail but this video is something i needed to see
Hi Pixie!!!! I’ve suffered with medication anxiety for pretty much my whole life so its so interesting to see such a bright and positive attitude towards it! I love that you’ve found something that works for you and i hope it continues to make your life more peaceful and enjoyable!! ❤️🖤❤️✨
I can relate to this with pain medication actually!
I did stop mental health medications years ago cold turkey (I know that's not recommended) and found that easy and relieving.
But pain medications was the first time I had empathy for withdrawals. It was utterly horrific.
i'm so happy for you!! and i just wanna say i loveee the way u did ur lips!! the whole look is so good
Wowow! I relate, I’m currently weening off anti depressants becasue I finally realised I’ve lost like 5 years of my life to the horrible side effects - they just become a normalised part of your life. Also forgetting to take them for 4 days and experiencing thaaaat idiation was not cute fun or fresh. I wish you well on this journey pixie! ♡
absolutely love your eye makeup omg
wow i completely understand the medications you were taking. I was on zoloft for the longest time. i started when i was in 5th grade to almost 12th grade. i hated it. by the time i got in my early adulthood it was enough for me. i finally got on the right medication and i feel so much better. im glad your doing so much better.
This kinda videos make me feel seen and not crazy, I don't have the same issues but I'm having a bad time, and I feel like I need to change my pills, and I've been so down lately. Videos like this are a blessing. ❤
oh my god wellbutrin is the only thing that manages to keep me awake during the day, i tried so many medications and always just had TERRIBLE side effects and nothing did anything for me before that, i'm so glad i found it honestly
I can always tell I’m dealing with a lot of stress when I have the same stress dream over and over. It always involves me being in a performance and either I can remember my lines or the choreography, I can’t find my costume, I’m late to go on stage, or I missed warmups.
Pixie u define a generation. Keep it up! Appreciate the videos!
Pixie, I’m so sorry about everything you’ve been dealing with for the last couple years. I hope you find more peace and healing on the other side of each challenge you face & become more confident & comfortable with yourself. I can’t help but notice the difference in you before and after the “new face & new pronouns” video & I get the sense you’re really going through it. I keep going back & watching your old videos, like your Japan vlogs, & still love your bubbly & sweet personality. 💖 Also, your rainbow aesthetic has always given me a huge serotonin boost, so thank you for that.
Right medication its a relief. If you think your doctor dont listen to you , that dont pay attention to you, go to another one, dont give up on therapy. It saved my life. I'm getting better and doing all I can to get better. The process is slow but it s still process . I learn to have patience with my self
I’m too scared to get off my antidepressants, but my ass needs to stay medicated. I’m so glad you are mindful and open minded to different things to help yourself.
Hi Pixie System! Thank you for being so honest about this topic. Medication, especially antipsychotics, are still so widely criticized and misunderstood. You made something really useful here, I feel. Best wishes for continued progress on your health journey
❤️😄
I recently came off anti-depressants I’d been on for 6 years. I had brain zaps and a lot of the other symptoms you mentioned, it was a really difficult couple of months, but worth it in the end!
Hello! I can definitely vouch for the heat sensitivity side-effect. Just be on the lookout for heatstroke, especially during the summer.
Me on my phone watching this because i cannot be alone with my thoughts ever 😂
Thanks for sharing ♥️
Side note that while Citalopram is an anti-depressant (SSRI), it's usually prescribed for anxiety disorders because it's mostly effective for that!
Switching my antidepressants gave me a solid month of feeling like an absolutely monstrous person; so irritable, so angry, every feeling was Too Much. It was worth changing, the new meds work so much more, but god it was hard. I hope your switch is as kind to you all as it can be.
Omg I went off Lexapro one time and it was the WORST. I was seriously having flu symptoms for weeks. I also ran out of Trileptal for bipolar for a few days and just that alone was enough for me to have crying spells and flu symptoms for days. I definitely feel for you. Withdrawal is not a joke!
I take Quetiapine for non psychosis reasons for many years and lately I have been wondering if I should change my meds. Thank you for a realistic look into what that will be like 💖
It works for many people with different symptoms!! Just for me particularly we thought we were treating one thing when it was actually another 💗 Best of luck to u 🥺🌈💕
I’ve had many brain zaps happen to me if I forget to take my lexapro, or couldn’t get it refilled in time and damn are they gnarly oof. Also you kinda pushed me into going back to my clinic’s psychiatrist to talk about different meds bc the ones I’ve been on for years are uh, not working. Much love to you and your system!💖
Sooo, my doctor straight up said that Seroquel wouldn't be "dangerous" and wouldn't be too bad to get off of of I ever needed to, and I thought that sounded sus at the time, and now you've confirmed I was right. It may not be dangerous sure, but clearly it's not an easy time! Oof. I am curious how much your dosage was, as I'm only on 40mg, 2 years in. And I'm not planning on going off it anytime soon, but thank you so much for sharing this!! Now I know what to prepare my self for!❤
Thank you so much for this pixie!! 💗 and for being you 😊
I came of antidepressants a month ago and I felt so physically ill. I got waves of nausea and my heart was pounding. I also cried a lot more, but I felt like I returned to the person I was before medication. So the medication really did something. But yeah so relieved it’s over and I have a new one which should have less withdrawal effects for someone who is forgetful with taking meds😅
Edit: The previours medication made me also so sweaty!
You look stunning, as usual! 🌺
I haven't seen your videos in a while, they haven't been coming up in my feed. I'm glad to see you again. Sending good energy and healing vibes through your medical journey 💕
Came to check if your new vid dropped today and it loaded in just as I refreshed, fuck yes! (If this is a heavy vid sorry) Glad to see a pixie vid!!
I was on a lower dose of quetiapine for anxiety and sleep problems. I also had a feeling of like sudden realisation about how they made me feel after I came off of them. It was like "oh, I can string a full sentence of words back together again and I've stopped having all those weird side effects. Maybe I do feel much better when I'm not taking them" lol.
Wellbutrin is the best medicine change ive made in my life 😭
I know exactly what this is like! Finding a new doctor too is SO hard right now.
I don’t think I’ve gone without listening and watching something in years both for my thoughts and to distract so I don’t fall into depersonalization or derealization more than just a veil
I'm currently wanting to get off my seroquel but if I don't take it, I have intense insomnia. I also get nightmares while taking it as well. I really don't want to be dependent on it anymore, but I'm scared of not sleeping for a week.
Oh hey, I need to refill my meds. Thanks for the reminder!
this outfit is EVERYTHING btw
Just went through the worst few weeks ever after a hard stop on Effexor. 😞 So many symptoms I've never had before.
Wishing you all the best!! ⭐️ Having the guts to go through the medication change process is very kewl.
Your outfit is so cute! Is that a jacket y'all made? It reminds me of the tassel jacket you made :D 💖
Thank youuuuu no but it’s similarish!! This one is from Romantic Standard in Harajuku hehe
I didn’t know it made you more sweaty that would explain why I was sooooo sweaty at work this summer and when I started going back to the gym omg so much sweaty
The fckn My Immortal edit oml
new pixie video!!! so excited to watch!!
i totally sympathise with the brain zaps oh my goddddd. worst thing ever you described it so well! hope ur having an amazing day pixie 🌸🌸💞💞💞
Hi 👋 I hope you are doing well 😊 and that everything is going well for you and that you're having a happy weekend and a happy Sunday 😊.
not me getting home from my pharamcy job and immediately throwing this on
I take Citalopram and Bupropion as well. I call the weaning and testing "guinea pigging" and it can be horrible.
I’m being weaned off Klonopin (it’s a stronger version of Ativan for anyone wondering and it’s such a great sedative like I knew going into it my sleep will never be the same) and I can’t stress enough how much of a PHYSICAL effect it has on a person. I’m just getting used to 1.5 mg because the brain zaps and brain fog were affecting my ability to focus/work. Luckily I 1. knew this was going to happen and 2. felt these side effects before and have a great support system, but it was agonizing even though I wasn’t nervous at all.
I know medication works for some people but not everyone and I am one who do not trust it after I was put on the wrong medications three different times and two of those times landed me in the emergency room twice. I do take some cheap anxiety and stress gummies and sometimes the pills from Walmart because I can not work clearly without it. The older I get the worse my anxiety and stress has been and I get depressed and have suicidal thoughts/tendencies so I just try to take it one day at a time. I have a lot of mental health issues so I’m scared of anything I can not control and people in general scares me to death. I feel like sometimes someone is talking about me or hates me because of different types of traumas I been through.
got an ad before this video that was about a drink that was "made to be straight" and asked me if I was "sick of woke advertising"
Early and just happy to be here! Hi pixie
Also the pink and lilac combo is so cute 🥺
I understand you said that you respect people who don't like medication to be understanding of all people but I don't think I do respect people who think that medication isn't helpful. You can say you've found your own cure but there is so much evidence that medication has helped people that when people say "It won't work you need meditation instead" I feel like they must know that there's a high chance they're hurting the person they're advising and are probably doing it to feel in control of other people's lives.
That’s a totally valid take 🤔🌈💕✨
Bruh to straight villianize others for having different opinions... lmfao but nah yeah they must be malicious for having different thoughts feelings and opinions 👍
I think it’s fine to believe medication isn’t the best choice for someone that you know very well. For example, my partner and I discuss medication choices with each other, and weigh the pros and cons together. I think it can helpful to have someone else (WHO KNOWS YOU WELL) to tell you they think a medication might not be helpful or might not be worth the side effects. But once you’ve made that choice or discussed it with them, I agree it’s not okay to keep badgering them about it or judging them for it. And I think it’s not okay to assume you know what’s best for someone unless you are intimately close with them.
@@eliontheinternet3298 @eliontheinternet3298 I think that's definitely fine if you've seen how someone reacts to something and are giving your experiences with them as evidence for them to think through on whether they continue taking meds. It's just when people speak outright like they KNOW meds won't work for anyone and especially if they say it to people they don't know online but even when they say it before someone's had a chance to try underneath a doctor's care.
Medication was horrible for me
I was on Effexor and Effexor only for YEARS. It made me feel like such a zombie, and it would make me so sick if I missed a single dose, migraines, nausea, etc. The first doctor I had after I moved out of my parents house took me off it cold turkey (why did she do that? No one knows.) and it caused withdrawal symptoms that were so bad that I missed a week of work. I am now on about 6 medications that help different parts of my mental illness makeup, and I feel so so much better. They don't have me feeling so sick if I miss a single dose either. It's just so funny to me how that one single pill made me feel so awful for years, but the amount I'm on today make me feel like an actual human being! I have been through so many different medicines, but I will always still be pro-medicine (even though I know it isn't for everyone!), and beyond grateful that I have the resources to get them, as well as help to adjust them if need be. Sorry if this was ramble-y lol!
19:55 yes I had mild ticks before going on Wellbutrin and they are still mild but occur daily now instead of weekly. Most people it goes away but it slightly (I DO MEAN SLIGHTLY) exasperated mine. I got face, limb, and neck/upper back spasms and after being off it for over a year now I just get the neck/upper back spasms a few times a day. I’ll take it because I’m alive 🎉 ☀️
Hello! You mentioned having to go to the ER if you don't have a primary care physician. I'm from the US, not CA, but over here when I was in that position I went to an urgent care. It was sort of in between an ER and a primary care. Lots of people with stuff that needed to be seen soon but that wasn't life threatening, and a few people like me waiting to have prescriptions filled or talk about concerns that they would normally discuss with a PCP.
I live in the same place as pixie, there’s no urgent care, just the ER. There are like two after hours clinics but they’re impossible to get in to, and even if you do, if it’s urgent care level they’ll send you to the ER
ive been thinking of getting off quetiapine but im so scared of touching my meds, it was a good idea to scroll through tiktoks of folks going through it, im stealing the idea if it ever comes up lol. i also took welbutrin at some point but idk when or why we got off that. brains are stupid. :')
Seroquel isn't only for psychosis, it's also used to treat bipolar disorder, specifically b2 (hypomania - not full mania). I'm on Seroquel and Lexapro (Citalopram) for bipolar going on 7 years now.