I married into a family with a lot of type 9’s….after a lot of years wondering why I (type 7w6) am left doing all the talking at family gatherings I realized they actually do have a lot to say if I mentally count to 30 before I open my mouth to keep the conversation going…they are not generally fast conversationalists unless they’re being witty or joking around. If you want to know what a type 9 thinks, you’ve got to give them time to formulate their ideas…even to the point of letting them get back to you several hours or days later.
That’s awesome that you count to 30 before you say anything! Thank you for giving your family a chance to talk! I seldom get a chance to say much because I don’t want to interrupt and I want to see if anyone else has something to contribute to the conversation before I do. I end up telling myself I’m not very interesting anyway, so why even try to enter the conversation. So, thank you again for giving your 9’s a chance to feel included! 😊
@ as a type 7 I leave too many conversations thinking that I talked too much🫤…Type 9’s are so good at saying the wise or insightful thing at just the right moment, in the most concise way. I’m really kind of jealous, it’s a gift that other chattier types admire.
@MicheleHaan I love 7s and 8s and any chatty ppl because I'm not too comfortable doing the talking myself. I do get talked over, but overall I prefer chatty ppl so I don't have to talk. :)
20:18 “tell me when you like how I look” All your points are great, but it’s also because we like to feel seen. It’s almost like - oh wow they noticed that I’m here 😅.
As a nine, I think we just thrive when we feel seen and recognized...because we may feel we are not quite "worthy" of attention. The compliment thing on appearance is so true...and I tend to often compliment others on their appearance as well...
The best video about 9 you have ever done is the one about the seven mile forest. That one almost made me cry. I think the flattery thing is about seeing the one who thinks no one sees them. The best thing you can do to a nine I think is to slow down and give them time to speak.
Yeah I definitely thought it would be funny if you got to "How to Get Along with Type 9s" and it was just like a 10 second video with no tips needed lol.
Hey, I am 9w1, sx and definitely agree with affectionate and hug me perspective. A way to show affection is coming from physical as well as emotional! 22:28
My #9 hubby hates to hear a rant from anyone, even when it is not concerning him at all. He hates hearing about big emotions of anger with big gestures and big voices such as Italians are "pictured" as doing on TV, etc. I have to never raise my voice or rant about an incident that happened to me because that riles him up and he just shuts down and doesn't listen, doesn't respond or validate in any way.
Thank you for sharing your experience! It’s always insightful to hear how different personalities interact. I appreciate you bringing this perspective to light!
9w8 here and I'm not super affectionate. I prefer not to hug, but if someone goes in for a hug I kinda hug back...ish.. mainly to avoid it getting awkward.
I'm an ENTP sexual 8w7, and with an INTP sexual 9w1. I have really been working on being softer for him, and trying not to be controlling or overbearing. We really do mesh well together and I always remind him to stand up for himself and say no to other people. We do have trouble with communication sometimes because I want him to be more straightforward and he has a hard time with that 🥴 Like just have the balls to say it out loud please 😂
It sounds like you're putting in a lot of effort to understand each other! Communication can be tricky, but your willingness to adapt is a great step forward. Keep encouraging him to express himself!
My boyfriend, who I also call Mr. Perfect ;) is a type 9. I’m super lucky, he’s the best ever! I love giving him attention and making sure he feels special ❤
People talk over me all the time! I hate that. Yes! Tell me I look good, yes, hug me, yes, talk to me about life, philosophy, yes, affirmation tell me you like my work, creations. Yes, enjoy things with me. Acknowledge my willingness to be there for you. Yes, respect my opinion, be ok with it.
Yesssss 🤪 no stories for / with me either ..but remenber all introverts do the opposit of their endings..ergo intj have merely the perrceiving form but feel disgusted by being forced to listen too much of storytellings ...😅😵💫🤓
I appreciate your insight! It’s interesting how different personality types interact. Understanding these dynamics can really help us connect better with each other.
NEVER tell me you like how I look! It’s so embarrassing. Don’t hug me either. 😳 I disagree totally. I’d want to run and hide. 🫣 If you like something I did, a compliment is appreciated but make it quick. 😅 One of the best compliments I’ve ever gotten is “she never asks for anything!” Not sure if that’s good or bad. 😄
I married into a family with a lot of type 9’s….after a lot of years wondering why I (type 7w6) am left doing all the talking at family gatherings I realized they actually do have a lot to say if I mentally count to 30 before I open my mouth to keep the conversation going…they are not generally fast conversationalists unless they’re being witty or joking around. If you want to know what a type 9 thinks, you’ve got to give them time to formulate their ideas…even to the point of letting them get back to you several hours or days later.
That’s awesome that you count to 30 before you say anything! Thank you for giving your family a chance to talk! I seldom get a chance to say much because I don’t want to interrupt and I want to see if anyone else has something to contribute to the conversation before I do. I end up telling myself I’m not very interesting anyway, so why even try to enter the conversation. So, thank you again for giving your 9’s a chance to feel included! 😊
@ as a type 7 I leave too many conversations thinking that I talked too much🫤…Type 9’s are so good at saying the wise or insightful thing at just the right moment, in the most concise way. I’m really kind of jealous, it’s a gift that other chattier types admire.
@@MicheleHaan I don’t think I’m that way. I usually go home and think about what I should have said, lol. 😆
That’s such a great way to put it.
@MicheleHaan I love 7s and 8s and any chatty ppl because I'm not too comfortable doing the talking myself. I do get talked over, but overall I prefer chatty ppl so I don't have to talk. :)
I’m a Type 9, and I have been looking forward to this one! Thanks for sharing.♥️💛💙
Same! It was a long weekend😅
You're welcome! 😊
I’m a Type 9w1 and I’ve been dreading this 😂😂😂🥰🥰🥰
@@jelsmommy bless your heart.. imma 9w8 thank God🙏🏻
20:18 “tell me when you like how I look”
All your points are great, but it’s also because we like to feel seen. It’s almost like - oh wow they noticed that I’m here 😅.
Oh, and it's about beauty. I love beautiful things in general and how uplifting is it to be beautiful myself with people noticing ❤
WOW, that makes sense....thanks!
As a nine, I think we just thrive when we feel seen and recognized...because we may feel we are not quite "worthy" of attention. The compliment thing on appearance is so true...and I tend to often compliment others on their appearance as well...
That makes sense! If people at least see me is better than having to work so hard yo be heard
Thanks
The best video about 9 you have ever done is the one about the seven mile forest. That one almost made me cry.
I think the flattery thing is about seeing the one who thinks no one sees them. The best thing you can do to a nine I think is to slow down and give them time to speak.
Thanks
19:43 "out collecting butterflies in the forest. I float above the ground" 😂
True...
@twlahue accurate for sure 😂
Tell me you like how I look means "I see you." When I go out of my comfort zone it feels good to know that effort was worth it to someone else.
You are not wrong!! You are exactly right coming from a type nine wing one!!!!
I'm glad you agree! Type 9s bring such a unique perspective to the table, don't they?
Yeah I definitely thought it would be funny if you got to "How to Get Along with Type 9s" and it was just like a 10 second video with no tips needed lol.
That sounds right to me.
Yes, people sure do like talking over me. Favorite line: “excuse me for talking while you’re interrupting!”
WOW
@@twlahuebeing interrupted and talked over is a pet peeve.
“I’m a rambling man - I ramble” 😂 cheers to self awareness and acceptance 😅
The Struggle Is Real!
Hey, I am 9w1, sx and definitely agree with affectionate and hug me perspective. A way to show affection is coming from physical as well as emotional! 22:28
Totally get you! A good hug can make everything feel better, right? Just keep spreading that love!
@ exactly!
I’ll check out your book! Thanks for the 9 videos. It’s been a trip
I’m glad you found them helpful! 😊
Yes, very affectionate and enjoying words of affirmation/appreciation and laughing 😊
That sounds about right!
My 9 wing 8 son loves hugs and even introduces himself at collrge as a hugger.
Wow... That is cool!
My #9 hubby hates to hear a rant from anyone, even when it is not concerning him at all. He hates hearing about big emotions of anger with big gestures and big voices such as Italians are "pictured" as doing on TV, etc. I have to never raise my voice or rant about an incident that happened to me because that riles him up and he just shuts down and doesn't listen, doesn't respond or validate in any way.
Thank you for sharing your experience! It’s always insightful to hear how different personalities interact. I appreciate you bringing this perspective to light!
9w8 here and I'm not super affectionate. I prefer not to hug, but if someone goes in for a hug I kinda hug back...ish.. mainly to avoid it getting awkward.
Love some time to meander 😅 🐢
Wouldn't It Be Nice!
I'm an ENTP sexual 8w7, and with an INTP sexual 9w1. I have really been working on being softer for him, and trying not to be controlling or overbearing. We really do mesh well together and I always remind him to stand up for himself and say no to other people. We do have trouble with communication sometimes because I want him to be more straightforward and he has a hard time with that 🥴 Like just have the balls to say it out loud please 😂
It sounds like you're putting in a lot of effort to understand each other! Communication can be tricky, but your willingness to adapt is a great step forward. Keep encouraging him to express himself!
All true! Tell me you like how I look...... We dress to please others and for me,it's my art form, along with music and architect.ure
My boyfriend, who I also call Mr. Perfect ;) is a type 9. I’m super lucky, he’s the best ever! I love giving him attention and making sure he feels special ❤
It sounds like you know him well!
People talk over me all the time! I hate that. Yes! Tell me I look good, yes, hug me, yes, talk to me about life, philosophy, yes, affirmation tell me you like my work, creations. Yes, enjoy things with me. Acknowledge my willingness to be there for you. Yes, respect my opinion, be ok with it.
9w1 and I'm very affectionate
I'm very much a 9, but I'm super healthy right now. I HATE anything other than actual reality.
Interesting.
Yesssss 🤪 no stories for / with me either ..but remenber all introverts do the opposit of their endings..ergo intj have merely the perrceiving form but feel disgusted by being forced to listen too much of storytellings ...😅😵💫🤓
I appreciate your insight! It’s interesting how different personality types interact. Understanding these dynamics can really help us connect better with each other.
NEVER tell me you like how I look! It’s so embarrassing. Don’t hug me either. 😳 I disagree totally. I’d want to run and hide. 🫣 If you like something I did, a compliment is appreciated but make it quick. 😅 One of the best compliments I’ve ever gotten is “she never asks for anything!” Not sure if that’s good or bad. 😄