At this point I have decided to basically just self-diagnose as AuDHD, because the more I look into it, and see media and videos relating to it. The more it makes sense for my brain. Also love the 4 R's. A thought for rampaging could be to play like heavy metal music or just a very punchy rap song or an aggressive song you know to help with it. If you like to sing (like I do) then you could just sing super loud and aggressive to help release the energy!
Oh my gosh your lantern and flashlight metaphor just blew my mind, in addition to the levels of autism ADHD and AuDHD!! that is the most helpful metaphor I've heard yet, and will be so useful explaining to neurotypical folks. I know I can't speak for everyone, but I feel my combination of HSPADHD feels like somewhere in between where I can be very happy spending most of my time in an ADHD version of polytropic mode, but I have some Jedi mind tricks to shift into calm focus monotropism when something is really urgent. i'm not saying it's easy to shift between mono and polytropic states... and there are specific environments like shopping alone in the grocery store or bad traffic or being around jerks or apathetic people , etc that overstimulate and exhaust me to the point where my executive functioning decreases even more. and definitely experience the inertia of monotropism , but I feel like the HSP part of me is a voice that sends me warnings that i need to shift back into polytrooic mode, which I can do but usually with great difficulty. I'm still learning to control/improve the transitions which I can do well sometimes. I just haven't figured out all the tricks yet
Since I was about 11, I've used very heavy metal to calm myself down, it always soothed the rage. The older I've got, the heavier the metal became. So now when I'm triggered, I blast some deathcore for an hour or so, then I feel angelic again!
I realize I've been doing this but the current hyperfixation is my incredibly fragile and struggling romantic relationship. I've been struggling to pull myself out of the vortex (and I've been using meditating, therapy, journaling, distractions, etc.). I'm grateful for a reminder that this what my brain does to everything of importance and I need to use other methods to switch or simply ride the wave in a more compassionate way.
I've been mostly stuck for 3 weeks after a huge crash into the dark abyss but I'm out of the abyss and I'm still kind of stuck. My first huge meltdown since unmasking and it was most likely due to cutting and polishing 32 stone cabochons in 1 day, it was exilerating and way too much. This is my longest hobby in 58 years cutting gems for 5 years!! Yay!! Your analogy makes total sense to me my beam is mostly scattered and only in order when I'm at work because I have to try and be efficient to make it easier. My home routine is not routine at all but I love it and hate it sometimes. Unorganized as all hell with my hobby and I love it and hate it. Half likes the chaos and even when it is organized it's still not really organized🤔 if that makes sense and sometimes feel it's less organized because I forget how I organized things or forget what's where!! Although the things I am selling are numbered and somewhat organized and that is a task that's hard to get through. My God I sound like a train wreck!!🤔🤔🤪🌶🤣🤣👻🌶 ♾️
The flashlight metaphor definitely made sense. Also, when you talked about stimming and the hair twirling, I was like, yea I do that all the time. Then you mentioned the fingernail thing and it made me realize I do that too and didn’t realize it until now lol ALSO the out of order organization lmao I know it’s better to mow the law first bc I live in the South and will 100% get sweaty, but sometimes my brain is like if you don’t shower first, you’re not gonna shower at all! Lame! lmao
Yay! I’m pausing it here because I REALLYYYYYYY wanted to share my interpretation of your analogy at the 3:25 mark or so. So super quick TLDR; as I understand mono/poly tropism (based solely on your vids and maybe like 2 other videos by ASD youtubers- haven’t been able to do more in depth searching yet!!) Anyway, with my hubby, I started wondering about “central” and “linear” thinkers like in Calculus- basically I did get a little lost in the full flashlight analogy, BUT English is also not my native language, so that could have been the cause of it. Based on what I UNDERSTOOD though and to sort of give a picture, what I imagine with the “flashlight” analogy is basically centripetal force- so with polytropism it’s like you’re the flashlight on the edge of a roundabout, you point in the direction you want to go and keep going indefinitely. But for me it feels like I’m the flashlight in the MIDDLE of the roundabout, bound to every direction and I don’t want to get off either, because moving from the middle risks getting thrown off or losing control. 😂 Is that what you were also implying??
Hmm…Rampage. I hit my pillow and kick my mattress with my feet when I’m lying in bed but having trouble actually getting up in the morning. I think it sometimes helps. I also sometimes tell myself to get up, firmly, a bunch of times in a row, but I don’t think that is very effective. I couldn’t yell though because I find yelling too loud, and difficult to do physically, or maybe psychologically.
At this point I have decided to basically just self-diagnose as AuDHD, because the more I look into it, and see media and videos relating to it. The more it makes sense for my brain.
Also love the 4 R's. A thought for rampaging could be to play like heavy metal music or just a very punchy rap song or an aggressive song you know to help with it. If you like to sing (like I do) then you could just sing super loud and aggressive to help release the energy!
@@EmotionalSupportChaosDemon loooove that idea for rampage!!!
And when something suddenly interferes with the flashlight beam, it is so disruptive/disregulating 🥹.
Oh my gosh your lantern and flashlight metaphor just blew my mind, in addition to the levels of autism ADHD and AuDHD!! that is the most helpful metaphor I've heard yet, and will be so useful explaining to neurotypical folks.
I know I can't speak for everyone, but I feel my combination of HSPADHD feels like somewhere in between where I can be very happy spending most of my time in an ADHD version of polytropic mode, but I have some Jedi mind tricks to shift into calm focus monotropism when something is really urgent. i'm not saying it's easy to shift between mono and polytropic states... and there are specific environments like shopping alone in the grocery store or bad traffic or being around jerks or apathetic people , etc that overstimulate and exhaust me to the point where my executive functioning decreases even more.
and definitely experience the inertia of monotropism , but I feel like the HSP part of me is a voice that sends me warnings that i need to shift back into polytrooic mode, which I can do but usually with great difficulty. I'm still learning to control/improve the transitions which I can do well sometimes. I just haven't figured out all the tricks yet
Pt. 4 of 3 is just perfect😅
@@meggieigge lololol
Since I was about 11, I've used very heavy metal to calm myself down, it always soothed the rage. The older I've got, the heavier the metal became. So now when I'm triggered, I blast some deathcore for an hour or so, then I feel angelic again!
@@Anna36936 I loooove this coping mechanism!!!
The flashlight metaphor made all the sense in the WORLD. Thank you for that.
@@papi_manny Thank you! I'm so glad it made sense!!!
second this. prioritising and keeping track of tasks is such a struggle, this explains that really well.
If I hear one more person say "flow state" 😑
whewwww that was soo spot on.
Loved the flashlight description ❤ i was nodding and smiling this end. So accurate and im glad im not alone
This makes perfect sense to me
I realize I've been doing this but the current hyperfixation is my incredibly fragile and struggling romantic relationship. I've been struggling to pull myself out of the vortex (and I've been using meditating, therapy, journaling, distractions, etc.). I'm grateful for a reminder that this what my brain does to everything of importance and I need to use other methods to switch or simply ride the wave in a more compassionate way.
I've been mostly stuck for 3 weeks after a huge crash into the dark abyss but I'm out of the abyss and I'm still kind of stuck. My first huge meltdown since unmasking and it was most likely due to cutting and polishing 32 stone cabochons in 1 day, it was exilerating and way too much. This is my longest hobby in 58 years cutting gems for 5 years!! Yay!! Your analogy makes total sense to me my beam is mostly scattered and only in order when I'm at work because I have to try and be efficient to make it easier. My home routine is not routine at all but I love it and hate it sometimes. Unorganized as all hell with my hobby and I love it and hate it. Half likes the chaos and even when it is organized it's still not really organized🤔 if that makes sense and sometimes feel it's less organized because I forget how I organized things or forget what's where!! Although the things I am selling are numbered and somewhat organized and that is a task that's hard to get through. My God I sound like a train wreck!!🤔🤔🤪🌶🤣🤣👻🌶 ♾️
The flashlight metaphor definitely made sense. Also, when you talked about stimming and the hair twirling, I was like, yea I do that all the time. Then you mentioned the fingernail thing and it made me realize I do that too and didn’t realize it until now lol ALSO the out of order organization lmao I know it’s better to mow the law first bc I live in the South and will 100% get sweaty, but sometimes my brain is like if you don’t shower first, you’re not gonna shower at all! Lame! lmao
I am on a waiting list to see if I have autism but I have been diagnosed with ADHD, this video hit hard with how I am...
Perfect sense!
Yay! I’m pausing it here because I REALLYYYYYYY wanted to share my interpretation of your analogy at the 3:25 mark or so. So super quick TLDR; as I understand mono/poly tropism (based solely on your vids and maybe like 2 other videos by ASD youtubers- haven’t been able to do more in depth searching yet!!) Anyway, with my hubby, I started wondering about “central” and “linear” thinkers like in Calculus- basically I did get a little lost in the full flashlight analogy, BUT English is also not my native language, so that could have been the cause of it.
Based on what I UNDERSTOOD though and to sort of give a picture, what I imagine with the “flashlight” analogy is basically centripetal force- so with polytropism it’s like you’re the flashlight on the edge of a roundabout, you point in the direction you want to go and keep going indefinitely. But for me it feels like I’m the flashlight in the MIDDLE of the roundabout, bound to every direction and I don’t want to get off either, because moving from the middle risks getting thrown off or losing control. 😂
Is that what you were also implying??
Very glad I found you. I just realized I’m effed.
I am monotropistic 🙂
Hmm…Rampage. I hit my pillow and kick my mattress with my feet when I’m lying in bed but having trouble actually getting up in the morning. I think it sometimes helps.
I also sometimes tell myself to get up, firmly, a bunch of times in a row, but I don’t think that is very effective. I couldn’t yell though because I find yelling too loud, and difficult to do physically, or maybe psychologically.
Rampage! 🏋
💖
I’m seen