Amy Schumer Isn’t Shallow | CONAN on TBS

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  • Опубликовано: 18 фев 2016
  • Amy Schumer doesn’t date men for their looks, she dates them for their money.
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    ABOUT CONAN ON TBS
    Airing weeknights since 2010, CONAN on TBS is home to topical monologues, remote segments, celebrity interviews, musical performances and stand-up from the top comedians in the world. Watch highlights, outtakes and behind the scenes footage of Conan palling around with sidekick Andy Richter, tormenting Associate Producer Jordan Schlansky and playing the latest video games on Clueless Gamer.
    ABOUT TEAM COCO
    Team Coco is the RUclips home for all things Conan O’Brien and the Team Coco Podcast Network. Team Coco features over 25 years of comedy sketches, celebrity interviews and stand-up comedy sets from CONAN on TBS and Late Night with Conan O’Brien, as well as exclusive videos from podcasts like Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend, Literally! with Rob Lowe, Why Won’t You Date Me? with Nicole Byer, The Three Questions with Andy Richter, May I Elaborate? with JB Smoove and Scam Goddess with Laci Mosley.
    Amy Schumer Stand-Up 10/20/11 | CONAN on TBS
    / teamcoco
  • ПриколыПриколы

Комментарии • 3,6 тыс.

  • @Will-gq6gn
    @Will-gq6gn 4 года назад +5979

    Amy, you don’t know me but I just wanted to thank you. Decades ago my grandpa had a terrible accident. He was in a coma for six weeks and when he finally woke up the doctor told him he’d never be able to walk again. He’s been in a wheel chair for 53 years. Today he stood up and walked across the room to shut off your comedy special thank you so much you will always hold a special place in my heart 🙏🙏🙏

    • @johnsneaker4356
      @johnsneaker4356 4 года назад +507

      I am so happy for your grandpa, have a beautiful day

    • @johnsneaker4356
      @johnsneaker4356 4 года назад +246

      I know, just carrying with the joke

    • @Noobmasterdp
      @Noobmasterdp 4 года назад +121

      I'm crying tears of joy

    • @-__9767
      @-__9767 4 года назад +39

      Sulaiman Samatar and you’re apparently thick-headed.

    • @dlai5702
      @dlai5702 4 года назад +4

      HAHAHAHA

  • @brennanfield4427
    @brennanfield4427 5 лет назад +4455

    Straight Face Gang

    • @Santi-Ae
      @Santi-Ae 5 лет назад +62

      Xaliosis well i looked kinda worried when she was talking about banging a high schooler

    • @boohoo334
      @boohoo334 5 лет назад +15

      Xaliosis I was smiling at how bad it was tbh nothing more

    • @viceflores691
      @viceflores691 4 года назад +3

      😐

    • @za88y
      @za88y 4 года назад +2

      -.-

    • @reyisagem5398
      @reyisagem5398 4 года назад +2

      👁👄👁

  • @mcphilly4825
    @mcphilly4825 4 года назад +2748

    The people in the comments actually made me laugh.

  • @ardnas994
    @ardnas994 4 года назад +3626

    I laughed more at some funerals.

    • @bzbxyo9606
      @bzbxyo9606 4 года назад +62

      Sandra R r/cursedcomments

    • @chickenwaffle8845
      @chickenwaffle8845 4 года назад +108

      I lowkey laughed harder at this than i did when watching this

    • @rosie5348
      @rosie5348 4 года назад +6

      R/holup

    • @fabiogaming9299
      @fabiogaming9299 4 года назад +8

      Damn you're cruel

    • @oogieboogie5857
      @oogieboogie5857 4 года назад +3

      xx scorpion xx you do realise one of Amy Schumer’s punchlines was “you’re friend died and I’m sorry... SIKE it should’ve been you hahahaha”

  • @hildegardkompton5878
    @hildegardkompton5878 7 лет назад +2651

    5:07 omg fav part 😂😂👌👌

    • @pimarv
      @pimarv 3 года назад +86

      Hildegard Kompton you got me there

    • @myk1172
      @myk1172 3 года назад +7

      Bliss

    • @rk2p556
      @rk2p556 3 года назад +48

      I started watching to see if it was really that bad, and this is the only thing I laughed at

    • @JuanCarlos-dz4tz
      @JuanCarlos-dz4tz 3 года назад +5

      Hahahahahh

    • @user-up8vy6le9y
      @user-up8vy6le9y 3 года назад +3

      saaame

  • @whawhawhawhaaaa
    @whawhawhawhaaaa 4 года назад +2499

    When the first joke is about her sleeping with a 14 year old, you know you're in for the long haul.

    • @elcruzer5514
      @elcruzer5514 4 года назад +24

      Some people just don't get it.Don't try. It's over your head. This is hilarious to me.

    • @elonlusk104
      @elonlusk104 4 года назад +115

      soon to be Cruzer55 what?

    • @mconline7089
      @mconline7089 4 года назад +152

      @@elcruzer5514 You alright my dude?

    • @petergriffin6223
      @petergriffin6223 4 года назад +3

      @@mconline7089 you missed the joke, but its fine coz most people did

    • @MiniGaffer.
      @MiniGaffer. 4 года назад +64

      @@elcruzer5514 because she said highschool crush but meant a child in highschool and shes a adult so funny makes me go haha

  • @teacub5986
    @teacub5986 4 года назад +4448

    Omg I’m dying lmao. 😂 I don’t think I’ve ever laughed soooo much
    Edit: sorry wrong video

    • @jambob7259
      @jambob7259 4 года назад +274

      Had us in the first half

    • @kewltony
      @kewltony 4 года назад +164

      Not gonna lie

    • @ariog.5287
      @ariog.5287 4 года назад +1

      realy? are you a robotß fake profile?

    • @reedplaysgames
      @reedplaysgames 4 года назад +14

      When she said “pregnant” I lol’d so hard omg wow such funny

    • @legitchadda1913
      @legitchadda1913 4 года назад

      shes a women u

  • @stimcc9890
    @stimcc9890 4 года назад +1975

    This is clearly a laugh track

    • @dogface2407
      @dogface2407 4 года назад +125

      True. If it wasnt, camera would be also pointing at the audiences, but no. She's not funny.

    • @MarkyMark2177
      @MarkyMark2177 4 года назад +9

      YES

    • @ChesterTheGod
      @ChesterTheGod 4 года назад +3

      Cherry

    • @PorQpine09
      @PorQpine09 3 года назад

      No its not

    • @Idk-fj9xh
      @Idk-fj9xh 3 года назад +5

      Divine Parker he probably is with that ugly ass hair 😂

  • @Neogenesisdiablo
    @Neogenesisdiablo 3 года назад +1239

    "When she was a kid, she said she wanted to be a comedian, everyone laughed. No one is laughing now."

  • @Kyzerii
    @Kyzerii 3 года назад +801

    2 Carnivorous Animals: *eats her*
    Carnivore 1: "Does this taste funny to you?"
    Carnivore 2: "No. Not at all."

  • @davidgere9989
    @davidgere9989 4 года назад +678

    Only time I laughed is when the crowd didnt clap for "her mom's birthday" joke..

    • @aeop
      @aeop 4 года назад +33

      It's a laugh track, the crowd is a lie

    • @smoothjas8
      @smoothjas8 3 года назад +3

      @Plasticide it’s because she said “all my black friend” as in she only has one black friend. It wasn’t funny but that’s what the joke was supposed to be

    • @smoothjas8
      @smoothjas8 3 года назад +1

      @Plasticide lol I don’t blame you I barely got it at first either

    • @User-rz7de
      @User-rz7de 3 года назад +1

      I got embarrassed lmao💀💀

  • @aristes1880
    @aristes1880 3 года назад +654

    Jesus christ, i didn’t think I would ever find a comedian this unfunny.

    • @wellifailed392
      @wellifailed392 3 года назад +8

      Look up "biceps comedian" and click the first one

    • @jamiemcclymont6745
      @jamiemcclymont6745 3 года назад +6

      Lily Singh

    • @Tsutsu5
      @Tsutsu5 3 года назад +6

      @@jamiemcclymont6745 no no, yu got a point, these two are basically identical

    • @udayjeetsingh1235
      @udayjeetsingh1235 3 года назад +1

      The worst part is they cut the video to show the best clips
      These were the best clips !??

    • @ryanyeo7768
      @ryanyeo7768 3 года назад +1

      Wait she’s a comedian? Oh.

  • @lilxan2303
    @lilxan2303 5 лет назад +1571

    take a shot for every funny joke she makes.
    you'll be sober

    • @MarioCorleone
      @MarioCorleone 4 года назад +3

      @@guntherdunyardphd3623 You'll still be alive

    • @extremegalactic4248
      @extremegalactic4248 4 года назад +9

      Sir it seems you have a negative alcohol level

    • @Belial21319
      @Belial21319 4 года назад +5

      You're comment is funnier then her.

    • @TheSilentWalkerz
      @TheSilentWalkerz 4 года назад +2

      It's the trick they use at AA meetings to get people to quit drinking.

    • @ranijannati7487
      @ranijannati7487 4 года назад +1

      I'll get drunk by the comment section.

  • @simpatiko6392
    @simpatiko6392 3 года назад +465

    Amy is the type of mother who tells her relatives an embarassing moment of you so she could make them laugh

  • @aburakuma4600
    @aburakuma4600 3 года назад +171

    She's actually a pretty funny person since she's a joke

  • @dalubuhlemagagula4944
    @dalubuhlemagagula4944 3 года назад +452

    “Try to laugh 99% fail god level impossible”

    • @abhinavraj3650
      @abhinavraj3650 3 года назад +5

      😂😭

    • @kxarmic
      @kxarmic 2 года назад +11

      i failed
      those comments are too funny

  • @SpaRtanl33tz
    @SpaRtanl33tz 8 лет назад +2175

    Is that a laugh track tape?

    • @alanamcconnell2977
      @alanamcconnell2977 8 лет назад +23

      Nope, live audience

    • @RonanJ218
      @RonanJ218 8 лет назад +238

      +Alana McConnell must be a disabled audience

    • @alanamcconnell2977
      @alanamcconnell2977 8 лет назад +26

      Ronan McCann lol keep in mind that basically no one knew of her or about her bad reputation as a "stealer of jokes"

    • @theluscioussound
      @theluscioussound 8 лет назад +63

      +Alana McConnell If these are stolen jokes she fucked up, because none of them are funny.

    • @marcosbandini
      @marcosbandini 8 лет назад +6

      +Spartan K It's to remind us to laugh.

  • @coolfool2100
    @coolfool2100 5 лет назад +703

    Comment section is 1000000x funnier than this video

    • @ianyoung5245
      @ianyoung5245 4 года назад +1

      This made me laugh more than the clip >_

    • @ice_cold467
      @ice_cold467 4 года назад +7

      1000000 x 0 is still zero lmao

    • @Miniom56785
      @Miniom56785 3 года назад +1

      That's not a hard feat to accomplish

    • @adamtheprop6959
      @adamtheprop6959 3 года назад +1

      The comment section is +1x100000000000000

  • @pepes5889
    @pepes5889 4 года назад +750

    I typed "unfunniest women stand up'' and this came up.

    • @knightrohan1
      @knightrohan1 4 года назад +32

      Same, but I did "terrible feminist comedy". Strange indeed.

    • @BillyBob-wt6tt
      @BillyBob-wt6tt 4 года назад

      That made me laugh lol

    • @eeee7815
      @eeee7815 4 года назад +1

      Same but I looked up bad female stand up comedy

    • @Chuck-zf7sl
      @Chuck-zf7sl 4 года назад

      Eric Ryan that weird. I’m the only person I’n this comment section under 12 inches.

    • @engagedfungus6777
      @engagedfungus6777 4 года назад +1

      I typed "female comedians cringe" and this popped up

  • @indickarma
    @indickarma 4 года назад +312

    1. Pedophilia
    2. Body shaming
    3. Narcissistic
    4. Yep, the beauty shaming joke
    Can't believe people laugh at this. I felt like dragging my face in the sand.
    And yes, that's racism.

    • @kaalajamun3741
      @kaalajamun3741 4 года назад +24

      Jokes have no boundaries, you can joke about anything... I don’t laugh at her jokes but she should have the freedom to joke about anything... in the scary movie, they have a scene where brenda is killed by other people in the hall trying to watch movies but she kept disturbing... so a black actor doesn’t have a problem with a similar joke... a joke is a joke, it’s not a statement or fact or opinion.

    • @kaalajamun3741
      @kaalajamun3741 4 года назад +5

      2. She was body shaming her imaginary boyfriend, not a real person...

    • @kaalajamun3741
      @kaalajamun3741 4 года назад +1

      Every one on the internet is a narcissist, you and me both

    • @indickarma
      @indickarma 4 года назад +5

      @@kaalajamun3741 I agree with you, jokes really doesn't have boundaries. But imagine a man doing this, and then imagine the backlash

    • @kaalajamun3741
      @kaalajamun3741 3 года назад +6

      @@threzzy comedy is relative my dude, maybe her audience is only rich immature girls... and they like to see a girl doing it, we don't have to watch her but people who bought tickets to her show want to see her so...

  • @rustyspygoat4089
    @rustyspygoat4089 5 лет назад +976

    0:29
    'tomorrow is my moms birthday.... No no don't clap, you don't know know her'
    But... nobody clapped?!

    • @chrismac1507
      @chrismac1507 5 лет назад +47

      That was the joke 💀

    • @valdenji
      @valdenji 5 лет назад +4

      R/wooosh

    • @halimahshehata8697
      @halimahshehata8697 5 лет назад +1

      Ur so dumb bro

    • @soop8665
      @soop8665 5 лет назад +1

      a person lol just as dumb as her jokes

    • @stonechaisson8156
      @stonechaisson8156 5 лет назад +25

      Chris Mac hahaha so funny get it because she said dont clap but no one clapped 😳😳😳😳 hahaha 😳

  • @ThoughtfulThug
    @ThoughtfulThug 8 лет назад +448

    5:06 The best part!

    • @not..A..channel
      @not..A..channel 4 года назад +19

      hey, but its the end of the vi.... ight; yeah best part...

    • @ridwan_z
      @ridwan_z 4 года назад +6

      That is funny as hell

    • @nbayoungboy765
      @nbayoungboy765 4 года назад +10

      The only part where I laughed

    • @lilsai8962
      @lilsai8962 4 года назад +1

      True

    • @ridwan_z
      @ridwan_z 4 года назад +2

      you watched the whole video!
      I only clicked on this video to read cmnts

  • @burniklover4705
    @burniklover4705 4 года назад +395

    0:17 “That’s not a joke, that’s a felony”
    - Orangepeanut

    • @jackingofftoraelilblack2342
      @jackingofftoraelilblack2342 3 года назад +4

      Her jokes alone are equal to 3rd degree murder she should be in jail by now

    • @derpfaceonigiri4950
      @derpfaceonigiri4950 3 года назад

      Hey garou

    • @philippweisang
      @philippweisang 3 года назад

      What a douchey, SJW thing to say

    • @jawg0
      @jawg0 3 года назад +3

      @@philippweisang it kinda is a felony tho

    • @philippweisang
      @philippweisang 3 года назад +1

      @@jawg0 Oh yeah? Didn't know they got rid of the first. Thanks for letting me know judge Judy

  • @moffe5241
    @moffe5241 4 года назад +108

    The only time I laughed is when I looked down and saw the dislike to like ratio.

  • @mullergui13
    @mullergui13 8 лет назад +684

    Her delivery is so bad dear god.

    • @Pontif11
      @Pontif11 8 лет назад +78

      +Guilherme Müller I actually like her delivery :/

    • @PuerRidcully
      @PuerRidcully 8 лет назад +4

      +Bryan Minaya
      Yeah, delivery is good, jokes are bad.

    • @dertythegrower
      @dertythegrower 8 лет назад +11

      +Guilherme Müller *All the people know she only got these roles because her uncle or someone in her family is Chuck Schumer, major politician in the New York CIty area... without him doing some kind of favors, she would not be on this clip right now* ... there's dozens and dozens of better woman comedians, and ones that don't steal jokes either.

    • @perskarva123
      @perskarva123 8 лет назад +27

      +Guilherme Müller OK comedy expert.

    • @capatheist
      @capatheist 8 лет назад

      +Guilherme Müller HEY it takes time to develop a routine ;-P

  • @vivares765
    @vivares765 5 лет назад +607

    The only Conan O'Brien video that has laugh tracks

    • @jasminehouston-burns1691
      @jasminehouston-burns1691 4 года назад +13

      Right ....because they made some extra special exception for one person after 20 years of having a live audience

    • @discogaming6549
      @discogaming6549 4 года назад +9

      Jasmine Houston-Burns real crowd with a laugh sign. Amy Schumer could never get real laughs

    • @miosohnebars8250
      @miosohnebars8250 4 года назад

      How do you know these are tracks?

    • @TheAngelaDaniel
      @TheAngelaDaniel 4 года назад +9

      Mios ohne Bars
      It’s Amy Schumer, they can’t be real genuine laughs at minimum

    • @user-fy7uu1zd9q
      @user-fy7uu1zd9q 4 года назад +7

      @@miosohnebars8250 because everyone is so synchronized

  • @ricoamordavila7496
    @ricoamordavila7496 3 года назад +392

    If I'm ever in a laughable mood and start giggling, I know where to go when I want it to stop. Thanks Amy for always making me realize that not everything is funny.

    • @Codettex
      @Codettex Год назад +2

      It will not work if I see the comment section though lol

    • @d.n.3652
      @d.n.3652 Год назад

      This comment is funnier than the whole video

  • @uza1rx078
    @uza1rx078 4 года назад +458

    Oh god, that felt far too long to watch.
    Best part tbh 5:07

  • @phoenixx5313
    @phoenixx5313 5 лет назад +81

    1:31 she legit stole that from reddit lol

    • @Coffeexcake05
      @Coffeexcake05 3 года назад +1

      💀💀💀💀💀 but why?

    • @kiwie6247
      @kiwie6247 3 года назад +5

      damn imagine being so unfunny you have to steal jokes from reddit

  • @gabbyparkercapes
    @gabbyparkercapes 7 лет назад +1940

    Her joke about wearing a bonnet on the subway.... That was some good Amish Humor ..... get it? .... Amy Schumer). I'll show myself the door.

    • @lucid622
      @lucid622 7 лет назад +171

      Gabrielle Capes that joke was better than her stand up

    • @thorhowatson3278
      @thorhowatson3278 7 лет назад +42

      Wish she'd used that joke, better than all her material put together

    • @samaraisnt
      @samaraisnt 7 лет назад +15

      took me like 80 seconds dude im so slow

    • @Kire667
      @Kire667 7 лет назад +7

      yes Amy Schumer sounds like Amish Humor. we get it

    • @orissol9056
      @orissol9056 7 лет назад +23

      Took me a second, but I got it
      Clever joke, better than any jokes made by amy schumer

  • @yeahyehoi1456
    @yeahyehoi1456 4 года назад +137

    4:25 “Racism is an issue”
    “I was hanging out with all my black friend”
    *que pre-recorded laugh track*

    • @kamikazekalamari
      @kamikazekalamari 3 года назад +17

      *proceeds to make jokes using black stereotypes*

    • @birdy4life32
      @birdy4life32 3 года назад +1

      That was a terrible joke your right i must admit

    • @philippweisang
      @philippweisang 3 года назад

      SJW much?

    • @sinuslebastian6366
      @sinuslebastian6366 3 года назад

      Philipp Weisang talking about yourself?

    • @goead
      @goead 3 года назад +1

      Wow that was actually terrible

  • @Someone89a
    @Someone89a 3 года назад +55

    The concepts behind the jokes aren’t too bad - but the execution is godawful

  • @BinhNguyen-ld6bi
    @BinhNguyen-ld6bi 7 лет назад +442

    "tomorrow is my mother's birthday"
    *silent*
    "no don't laugh you don't know her!"
    *crowd cheering*
    what?

  • @Plague_Doc22
    @Plague_Doc22 8 лет назад +645

    I guarantee shes going to mention something about being a woman and/or overweight.

    • @Plague_Doc22
      @Plague_Doc22 8 лет назад +61

      Oh wow no woman or overweight jokes...her writers must've copied something else.

    • @Babytronians
      @Babytronians 8 лет назад +11

      +Caitlyn Kimberly Other comedians don't get offended when their jokes are used against them.

    • @infogirl314
      @infogirl314 8 лет назад +6

      Yup the victim card as usual.

    • @xxczerxx
      @xxczerxx 8 лет назад

      SlothGiraffe Comedian + getting offended is a recipe for disaster, it's like anti-comedy.

    • @Stephensofceea
      @Stephensofceea 8 лет назад +14

      +Plague Doc She is a women, what should she talk about aliens????

  • @gama5942
    @gama5942 3 года назад +28

    I think the audience is real, not to laugh at her jokes, but to laugh at her.

  • @adrianbuesomarti9449
    @adrianbuesomarti9449 3 года назад +28

    A friend wrote me saying "water be like: wett" and it was funnier than this

  • @ToiletClogger1945
    @ToiletClogger1945 8 лет назад +256

    and here come the joke-thief jokes

    • @Qurisx
      @Qurisx 8 лет назад +1

      you should research before you accuse

    • @ChaseStopera
      @ChaseStopera 8 лет назад +23

      +Christopher Borelli he didn't accuse anyone did you even read his comment

    • @PlutoMute
      @PlutoMute 8 лет назад

      +ToiletClogger1945 Lol, it isn't a joke. It's just true.

    • @potheadkennewick
      @potheadkennewick 8 лет назад

      I think joke thieves should pay.... For sex

    • @jacobhugo6081
      @jacobhugo6081 8 лет назад +7

      Because she did and it's not a joke and if there was a joke thief joke she would have stole it.

  • @cheekycody
    @cheekycody 4 года назад +77

    If I was there I’d just shout “you’re not funny”

    • @oneguy694
      @oneguy694 4 года назад +19

      I dont think anybodys there, the laughs have to be pre recorded

    • @yourfriend895
      @yourfriend895 3 года назад +4

      I mean, you are right, but that's still rude.

    • @cheekycody
      @cheekycody 3 года назад +4

      ALVARO SAIZ SERRA shut up

    • @yourfriend895
      @yourfriend895 3 года назад +2

      @@cheekycody ok...

    • @oneguy694
      @oneguy694 3 года назад +2

      @@yourfriend895 good

  • @benkenobi3964
    @benkenobi3964 3 года назад +53

    Her comedy is literally just "I'm drunk now laugh haha"

  • @haileystarlight8376
    @haileystarlight8376 3 года назад +103

    When this comment section is funnier than all her stand-ups combined

  • @AdamPFarnsworth
    @AdamPFarnsworth 8 лет назад +68

    I think she might have a future in comedy.

    • @AntonPursiainen
      @AntonPursiainen 8 лет назад +1

      +Marc Lemieux wtf?

    • @ericmichaud1273
      @ericmichaud1273 8 лет назад +14

      Anton Pursiainen She had sex with a drunk man. According to the logic of her very own ideology (feminism) that's considered rape. Also she made fun of him for it.

    • @Pizza_Rat
      @Pizza_Rat 8 лет назад +6

      +Adam Farnsworth yeah, most famous people live off of stealing things now, so she might have a chance

    • @inhaledexhaled5460
      @inhaledexhaled5460 8 лет назад

      Its been common since comedy starting becoming popular. gtfoi

  • @dr.triceps
    @dr.triceps 8 лет назад +1099

    how much of that did she steal?

    • @Qurisx
      @Qurisx 8 лет назад +22

      you should research before you accuse

    • @deathtoallbuttmetal8148
      @deathtoallbuttmetal8148 8 лет назад +164

      +Christopher Borelli you should research before you comment

    • @KimDyouza
      @KimDyouza 8 лет назад +5

      +Tucker K proof?

    • @LightRoll789
      @LightRoll789 8 лет назад +33

      +Kim Salvagni G to the O to the O to the G to the L to the E
      What's that spell? Google.
      Google it.

    • @xxx0ox0
      @xxx0ox0 8 лет назад +1

      +Abbe Tube all of it cuz someone else wrote it i think

  • @andrewptob
    @andrewptob 3 года назад +62

    Definitely a laugh track. Wow. Must be nice to have a powerful connections

  • @Bin-yy6wo
    @Bin-yy6wo 4 года назад +31

    "how about another joke MURRAY"

  • @Gillerz100
    @Gillerz100 8 лет назад +347

    "Why did you unsubscribe?"
    Amy Schumer

    • @DNotzz
      @DNotzz 8 лет назад +14

      Lol what a brat. Grow up

    • @Gillerz100
      @Gillerz100 8 лет назад

      DubstepinWithSmoke I love you.

    • @andquester
      @andquester 8 лет назад +1

      +Gillerz100 Then you are an idiot.

    • @DNotzz
      @DNotzz 8 лет назад

      Lol he would follow GradeA.
      Hope things get better for you man. Cheer up ! :)

    • @JoefromNJ1
      @JoefromNJ1 8 лет назад +1

      +Gillerz100 she gets her material from peeps like you. so keep helping her act.

  • @snyparaustralis540
    @snyparaustralis540 3 года назад +73

    Damn.... this has more cuts than the emo kid in high school...

    • @Miniom56785
      @Miniom56785 3 года назад

      This is funny

    • @crimson62
      @crimson62 3 года назад +1

      i laughed at this more then the video

    • @hearthebellsring3990
      @hearthebellsring3990 3 года назад +2

      This actually made me sad. I know a ton of people who cut themselves.

    • @noobLOL77
      @noobLOL77 3 года назад

      BWAAA😂😂😂😂😂

    • @user-gh5jc9tx5r
      @user-gh5jc9tx5r 3 года назад

      @@hearthebellsring3990
      Gonna cry?
      Cope harder

  • @aegg9915
    @aegg9915 4 года назад +57

    When the “professional comedian” is less funny than the host. What’s the point?

    • @A-FELIX
      @A-FELIX 2 года назад

      In conan's defense, he's pretty effing hilarious.

  • @maze5417
    @maze5417 3 года назад +74

    Everyone: "Keep digging men, we have to find the joke."
    The fake audience: "Ha Ha, Amy make funny"

    • @cedba5033
      @cedba5033 3 года назад +2

      🤣🤣🤣

    • @vukvolkov
      @vukvolkov 2 года назад

      Who keeps digging men?

  • @MrJgreenwell2000
    @MrJgreenwell2000 7 лет назад +648

    The "audience" sounds like a pre-recorded laugh track. So cringey..

  • @hypermetalsonic
    @hypermetalsonic 8 лет назад +725

    Nothing she said was even funny... is this just a laugh track or something?

    • @tyler0896
      @tyler0896 8 лет назад +26

      +hypermetalsonic The only ones laughing are the ones who think she's some kind of hero for social change or whatever. "Ha ha ha" literally translates to "you go girl!"

    • @HerrDurkslag
      @HerrDurkslag 8 лет назад +17

      Well, her delivery was pretty bad. But I thought the paedophile, the abortion and the black friend joke was pretty solid.
      Eh, humor is subjective I guess.

    • @Pizza_Rat
      @Pizza_Rat 8 лет назад +17

      Sgt Chickenwing its STOLEN

    • @HerrDurkslag
      @HerrDurkslag 8 лет назад +5

      OG Jatt Probably. But let's be honest, most comedians at least reuse jokes. If you really only want original material, you're basically limiting yourself to the greatest ones, like George Carlin, Andy Kaufman, Richard Pryor etc. And they're all dead.
      But where were they taken from? Someone famous?

    • @Pizza_Rat
      @Pizza_Rat 8 лет назад +13

      Sgt Chickenwing she made jokes about a recently passed person when the his best friend was in the audience (a really bad joke may i add) and she has stolen a lot of jokes, you should look it up she is really disgusting

  • @BALAJIMSV
    @BALAJIMSV 3 года назад +11

    The biggest joke would be calling her a "Comedian"

  • @poojamblik528
    @poojamblik528 3 года назад +4

    The 'F' in Amy Schumer stands for funny

  • @Josh-
    @Josh- 8 лет назад +178

    She was skinnier then.

    • @carltonhanks6679
      @carltonhanks6679 8 лет назад +24

      +Josh Yeah, she actually used to be kind of attractive

    • @Rize_Inn
      @Rize_Inn 8 лет назад

      +Josh And more tan.

    • @DoctorPretorious616
      @DoctorPretorious616 8 лет назад +5

      +Josh I think Amy looks cuter with a little more cushion for the pushin'...

    • @joseserrato9774
      @joseserrato9774 8 лет назад +1

      +DoctorPretorious616 agree

    • @Jolandatommy
      @Jolandatommy 8 лет назад

      +Josh And you are still a nobody like most of us

  • @muktadirminex7492
    @muktadirminex7492 8 лет назад +43

    Wonder who's jokes she stole this time

  • @demedooley9235
    @demedooley9235 3 года назад +9

    “Don’t clap “
    *literally nobody clapped Lmao* 💀

    • @replti3742
      @replti3742 3 года назад +3

      They didn’t have a clap track 💀

  • @quinntilating
    @quinntilating 3 года назад +61

    sometimes when my jaw hurts from laughing too much at the mirror
    i kickback and watch an amy schumer video so that my jaw can rest and heal.

  • @TeamCoco
    @TeamCoco  8 лет назад +407

    Before writing and starring in "Inside Amy Schumer" and "Trainwreck," Amy Schumer performed stand-up on CONAN - now on RUclips!

    • @fargotua13
      @fargotua13 8 лет назад +10

      why now?

    • @osskeet
      @osskeet 8 лет назад +2

      +Israel Pulido hahahaha yup.

    • @Qurisx
      @Qurisx 8 лет назад +3

      +Bobby Lemon you should research before you accuse.

    • @Qurisx
      @Qurisx 8 лет назад +2

      +Israel Pulido you should research before you accuse

    • @Reviresco
      @Reviresco 8 лет назад +18

      +Christopher Borelli Are you the general of the CopyPaste Army?

  • @TheMysteriousBook
    @TheMysteriousBook 8 лет назад +24

    just because she is succesful now, everyone is hating.? also that was 5 years ago.. read the title, and calm down.

    • @Skeevee
      @Skeevee 8 лет назад +22

      the hate is cause she steals jokes, dude. not cause she's famous. lol

    • @powerhouse884
      @powerhouse884 8 лет назад +2

      +SlimxWorm THATS COMEDY!!!! They all steal jokes.

    • @Joyboy0101
      @Joyboy0101 8 лет назад +9

      +PowerHouse_ PR No they dont.

    • @willt.9654
      @willt.9654 8 лет назад

      Exactly!

  • @lilfam4882
    @lilfam4882 3 года назад +17

    0:01 yea, it starts with "i slept"

  • @xxpumpkinseedsxx1850
    @xxpumpkinseedsxx1850 2 года назад +3

    Kids are always told that they can be anything they want when they grow up, Amy Schumer is living disproof

  • @forestmullens6177
    @forestmullens6177 8 лет назад +147

    REST IN PEACE RYAN DUNN.

    • @purplenurps
      @purplenurps 8 лет назад +1

      +Bobby Lemon o neal****

    • @emantabrizi
      @emantabrizi 8 лет назад +6

      +Wesley Mullens
      More like "rest in pieces." Dude was going 160 mph.

    • @intergalacticspacecanoe4659
      @intergalacticspacecanoe4659 8 лет назад

      +Michael Leibowitz yea. drunk. rest in feces, more likely

    • @intergalacticspacecanoe4659
      @intergalacticspacecanoe4659 8 лет назад

      ***** dunno, but laughing at a dead Ryann Dunn is funnier than anything Amy Schumer has ever done.

    • @janybasile2173
      @janybasile2173 8 лет назад

      +Michael Leibowitz wow did you come up with that on the spot! you are a funny guy! look at yourself in the mirror tonight and tell yourself how much talent you have! the sky is the limit with you my friend

  • @5kastubh5
    @5kastubh5 8 лет назад +262

    internet is scary place..rabid pack of wolves..

    • @Anniemax1
      @Anniemax1 8 лет назад +5

      +kaustubh awewwwwwwwwww

    • @KW-vs3cw
      @KW-vs3cw 8 лет назад +4

      KASKKSKWKSKZNAKAXJNSKALWNSNSNA SCJSND S RAWERRWE RARATATWAER (rabid wolf noises)

    • @Jordan-jp6nc
      @Jordan-jp6nc 8 лет назад

      Kakaknaashahahah kashiwa kashdhshsbsaaaanana (more rabid wolf noises)

    • @adl1578
      @adl1578 8 лет назад +4

      +kaustubh for real though. I think she's pretty funny ahaha

    • @johnnythreefour2902
      @johnnythreefour2902 8 лет назад +3

      +kaustubh Are you going to cry? I feel like you're going to cry a little bit. Almost like a little baby.

  • @everythingonyt5294
    @everythingonyt5294 3 года назад +10

    Just imagine when she said “I’m pretty drunk right now”, somebody from the audience yelled “OH THAAAT’S WHY”

  • @urboimiguel1066
    @urboimiguel1066 3 года назад +15

    Nobody:
    Amy Schumer: LoL Sex Jokes lmao

  • @SpacemanXC
    @SpacemanXC 8 лет назад +541

    Damn you people hold a grudge. lol. This set wasn't _that_ horrid.
    Most likely because someone else wrote it. But still...

    • @ao_qd
      @ao_qd 8 лет назад +2

      +SavannahDarlink I mean...she started this off with a statutory rape joke. Wouldn't put it past her to take advantage of a drunk guy.

    • @Mossfaerie
      @Mossfaerie 8 лет назад +1

      +Quan Dang well I don't think making jokes about offensive things means you would do those things but in this case It doesn't help her case after she openly admitted to doing it.

    • @ao_qd
      @ao_qd 8 лет назад

      SavannahDarlink Was this stand-up before or after she admitted it? Because if it was after the fact, then joking about rape shows no remorse...

    • @Mossfaerie
      @Mossfaerie 8 лет назад +1

      Quan Dang This is from before she admitted it but after she did it to him.

    • @fede018
      @fede018 8 лет назад +4

      People only hate because the title mentioned "Amy Schumer" That's it. It's cool to hate on her these days

  • @get6149
    @get6149 6 лет назад +20

    Lol I just laughed when she said we think she's so perfect

  • @kaye_go_moo9790
    @kaye_go_moo9790 3 года назад +21

    10 out of 10 comedy gold.
    That's what I rate the comment section as.

  • @bruhtistic
    @bruhtistic 3 года назад +3

    Seeing a horse on a balcony is funnier than Amy Schumer

  • @paul1s1
    @paul1s1 8 лет назад +292

    IM WATCHING THIS UNDER THE SHEETS AT NIGHT AND THE BRIGHT FLASHES HURT MY EYES

    • @druiz77
      @druiz77 7 лет назад +4

      Walrus Paul ok good.. I thought it was lighting from outside

    • @lucystankus
      @lucystankus 6 лет назад

      Omg same

    • @lmao.3661
      @lmao.3661 6 лет назад +5

      Oh I thought I was going blind form cringing too hard

    • @akotofiq8394
      @akotofiq8394 5 лет назад

      james Corduroy you nailed it

    • @nsnkungfu2108
      @nsnkungfu2108 4 года назад

      The bad jokes are hurting my ears

  • @Lunathicc312
    @Lunathicc312 Год назад +6

    The one thing about this that made me laugh is the fact that she came up with those jokes and decided they’re not only good enough to write down, but also to present to an audience

  • @RealJoeBidenn
    @RealJoeBidenn 3 года назад +3

    The Audience: 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣
    Me The Entire video: 😐

  • @sandavijithminirathnayake7033
    @sandavijithminirathnayake7033 3 года назад +11

    That " high school crush " joke was clearly stolen from a stand up of young Bob Saget in 1984 . The video is available on RUclips.
    " I'm a happy man , I just got married to my girlfriend of seven years . Thank you , thank you ....that's her age , I'm going to jail ."

    • @kristen3715
      @kristen3715 3 года назад +2

      thats nowhere near to the joke she made. his joke was about him marrying a 7 year old and her joke was about sleeping with a highschool boy. but yeah neither are really that funny just saying she didnt really copy that one just cuz its an underage joke :/

    • @donaldbiden5755
      @donaldbiden5755 3 года назад +1

      @@kristen3715 maybe maybe not.
      There 27 minutes video on RUclips her joke stealing and materials

    • @ember-brandt
      @ember-brandt 2 года назад

      @@kristen3715 - knowing her, it's still just a recycled Bob Saget joke - but yeah, you're right, she usually steals her jokes verbatim. Weird :/

  • @NO1wantsWORLDWAR3
    @NO1wantsWORLDWAR3 8 лет назад +116

    Amy "Carlos Mencia" Schumer

    • @Skeevee
      @Skeevee 8 лет назад +1

      savage. 😂

    • @willyoutube17
      @willyoutube17 8 лет назад

      Who's that?

    • @brockmobile
      @brockmobile 8 лет назад +2

      +Whiskey Tango Foxtrot The Schumo-wrestler

    • @rocc9
      @rocc9 8 лет назад

      +Willear Glimniene the fish sticks guy

    • @sneekizzle7127
      @sneekizzle7127 8 лет назад +2

      Amy "Carlos MenStealer" Schumer

  • @atllex
    @atllex 8 лет назад +135

    "It's my mom's birthday" *no claps* "Stop clapping you dont know her".... Comic gold

  • @sirsalad3772
    @sirsalad3772 3 года назад +8

    I’m pretty sure she’s the only comedian that needs a laugh track

  • @PonchiOFFICIAL
    @PonchiOFFICIAL 3 года назад +5

    Amy: tomorrow is my mom’s birthday
    *no applause*
    Amy: *No don’t clap you don’t know her*

  • @TheNewFlesh
    @TheNewFlesh 8 лет назад +166

    I knew this comment section would be a cesspool, but damn.

  • @lamyshamy5167
    @lamyshamy5167 5 лет назад +58

    Try not to laugh easy mode

  • @nouscow4727
    @nouscow4727 4 года назад +7

    Surprising they shot a laugh track for the background, even a sex tape playing in the background would suit this better.

  • @noot3778
    @noot3778 Год назад +1

    "tomorrow's my mums birthday"
    * silence *
    "no don't clap"

  • @ChrisKoelsch
    @ChrisKoelsch 8 лет назад +6

    Bad move Coco, internet is out on Amy.

  • @Gregapher
    @Gregapher 8 лет назад +9

    Not saying she cant use her own jokes over and over, but this is literally the set she did in one of her specials. I guess she didnt have time to come up with a new 5 minutes? I guess that's what fame does to comics.

    • @epic3924
      @epic3924 8 лет назад +5

      This was in 2011 so it might have been before that special but either way a lot of comedians reuse bits, its not until they're ready for a new special that they toss the old ones

    • @jennythorson8912
      @jennythorson8912 8 лет назад +6

      +Gregapher Look at the date. This was from 2011...

    • @Gregapher
      @Gregapher 8 лет назад

      +Jenny Thorson You're right, I didnt notice that this was from an earlier date. And I think the special these jokes are from was in 2012, so that's my bad.

  • @AdamAdam-uf5hu
    @AdamAdam-uf5hu 3 года назад +5

    I laughed more when my dog died

  • @_c3a3m_88
    @_c3a3m_88 3 года назад +4

    *nobody claps* “no don’t clap”

  • @lineoarlow5120
    @lineoarlow5120 8 лет назад +6

    "I'll get us a cab" lmao

  • @kaylaslack9276
    @kaylaslack9276 7 лет назад +4

    Teen Mom, or if you're from the south, Mom.
    I AM D E C E A S E D

  • @dougsam6341
    @dougsam6341 4 года назад +7

    She knows how to kill the mood.

  • @cici-dvajsdvojka
    @cici-dvajsdvojka 3 года назад +6

    I havent cried in years, and this made me cry in the first minute.
    I really want to end this misery.
    Kill me.

    • @xaviotesharris891
      @xaviotesharris891 2 года назад

      Please tell me someone has granted your request.

    • @davidshave439
      @davidshave439 2 года назад

      Be happy to help you with that !! Im sure your hate will kill u soon enough ...or sadly ....not...

  • @TheDebbyG
    @TheDebbyG 8 лет назад +373

    Jesus, can everybody just take a goddamn chill pill?

    • @miggidymark
      @miggidymark 8 лет назад +20

      A chill pill, are you serious?? Gadaffi was just killed and Obama needs to find his birth certificate. ...it's 2011 and you want to relax, ahhhhhh!!!

    • @johnwilson1679
      @johnwilson1679 8 лет назад

      +Hadi Mahmood LMAO

    • @birdmanbob05
      @birdmanbob05 8 лет назад +3

      +theweirdguy124 And a joke thief

    • @mikerowsdower9896
      @mikerowsdower9896 8 лет назад +3

      +TheDebbyG Take a chill pill, that's a good one...Amy should use it!

    • @infogirl314
      @infogirl314 8 лет назад

      No one is angry to take a pill chill, it's all opinion expression. And not all feedback will be positive.

  • @AIOUCH01
    @AIOUCH01 8 лет назад +63

    He looks like the guys from the hills....have eyes.
    Lmaooo

  • @fresh4434
    @fresh4434 3 года назад

    0:00-0:00 is the best joke lmaoooooooo 😂

  • @vickynoneya4091
    @vickynoneya4091 4 года назад

    Stop yelling we're not at the movies...yes she did lol 🤣🤣🤣

  • @meowc2973
    @meowc2973 7 лет назад +139

    "i'm not racist" ah well

    • @marie-lynnissa656
      @marie-lynnissa656 7 лет назад +32

      Caterina Gullone she purposely said that. You obviously didn't get her sarcasm.

    • @lmao.3661
      @lmao.3661 6 лет назад +4

      Marie-Lynn Issa
      But she's legitimately racist

    • @hirvale
      @hirvale 6 лет назад +4

      Marie-Lynn Issa except nothing indicated it was sarcasm. She just said racist stuff and we're supposed to laugh. Her delivery is just terrible

    • @raykwunhunter1344
      @raykwunhunter1344 6 лет назад +11

      Omg shut up im black and didnt get offended i though it was actually funny it a joke calm down

    • @lmao.3661
      @lmao.3661 6 лет назад +5

      Raykwun Hunter
      It doesn't matter if it was offensive it was still considered racist

  • @jazminvalle6491
    @jazminvalle6491 6 лет назад +3

    "Temembe" 😂 lmao

  • @leonzwei8020
    @leonzwei8020 Год назад +2

    6:02 best part hahaha

  • @anthonyfranco3854
    @anthonyfranco3854 3 года назад +14

    Jesus I’ve never heard a “comedian” that was so unfunny

  • @taxidrivernwo
    @taxidrivernwo 8 лет назад +19

    I'm soooo excited! I love hearing Patrice O'Neal jokes!

  • @core-hacked
    @core-hacked 2 года назад +5

    I have just watched her for the first time and I laughed more at a piece of toast falling than this entire thing.

  • @jesus9925
    @jesus9925 3 года назад +4

    Jesus has never been so appauled

  • @bigdoggaming3558
    @bigdoggaming3558 4 года назад +3

    Imagine looking up unfunny comedians and this pops up as the first result on google... gotta love the accuracy.

    • @ember-brandt
      @ember-brandt 2 года назад

      Her face literally does come up, lol