Amy Schumer Isn’t Shallow | CONAN on TBS
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- Опубликовано: 18 фев 2016
- Amy Schumer doesn’t date men for their looks, she dates them for their money.
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Airing weeknights since 2010, CONAN on TBS is home to topical monologues, remote segments, celebrity interviews, musical performances and stand-up from the top comedians in the world. Watch highlights, outtakes and behind the scenes footage of Conan palling around with sidekick Andy Richter, tormenting Associate Producer Jordan Schlansky and playing the latest video games on Clueless Gamer.
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Amy Schumer Stand-Up 10/20/11 | CONAN on TBS
/ teamcoco 
Приколы
Amy, you don’t know me but I just wanted to thank you. Decades ago my grandpa had a terrible accident. He was in a coma for six weeks and when he finally woke up the doctor told him he’d never be able to walk again. He’s been in a wheel chair for 53 years. Today he stood up and walked across the room to shut off your comedy special thank you so much you will always hold a special place in my heart 🙏🙏🙏
I am so happy for your grandpa, have a beautiful day
I know, just carrying with the joke
I'm crying tears of joy
Sulaiman Samatar and you’re apparently thick-headed.
HAHAHAHA
Straight Face Gang
Xaliosis well i looked kinda worried when she was talking about banging a high schooler
Xaliosis I was smiling at how bad it was tbh nothing more
😐
-.-
👁👄👁
The people in the comments actually made me laugh.
Unlike her
Same
2 million strong
comment sections are always funny
Man, where are you?! We need you in wano!!
I laughed more at some funerals.
Sandra R r/cursedcomments
I lowkey laughed harder at this than i did when watching this
R/holup
Damn you're cruel
xx scorpion xx you do realise one of Amy Schumer’s punchlines was “you’re friend died and I’m sorry... SIKE it should’ve been you hahahaha”
5:07 omg fav part 😂😂👌👌
Hildegard Kompton you got me there
Bliss
I started watching to see if it was really that bad, and this is the only thing I laughed at
Hahahahahh
saaame
When the first joke is about her sleeping with a 14 year old, you know you're in for the long haul.
Some people just don't get it.Don't try. It's over your head. This is hilarious to me.
soon to be Cruzer55 what?
@@elcruzer5514 You alright my dude?
@@mconline7089 you missed the joke, but its fine coz most people did
@@elcruzer5514 because she said highschool crush but meant a child in highschool and shes a adult so funny makes me go haha
Omg I’m dying lmao. 😂 I don’t think I’ve ever laughed soooo much
Edit: sorry wrong video
Had us in the first half
Not gonna lie
realy? are you a robotß fake profile?
When she said “pregnant” I lol’d so hard omg wow such funny
shes a women u
This is clearly a laugh track
True. If it wasnt, camera would be also pointing at the audiences, but no. She's not funny.
YES
Cherry
No its not
Divine Parker he probably is with that ugly ass hair 😂
"When she was a kid, she said she wanted to be a comedian, everyone laughed. No one is laughing now."
shiba
actually I did! Took about 3 seconds to get the joke though.
How about another like Murray?
Underated comment
you've seen Joker too.
That's about as hacky as it gets
2 Carnivorous Animals: *eats her*
Carnivore 1: "Does this taste funny to you?"
Carnivore 2: "No. Not at all."
Underrated comment
Funnier than the video
Dam my mind automatically read Corona virus
Kyzerii you got a good laugh out of me! Thanks!
World vs China & Chuje welcome to 2020!
Only time I laughed is when the crowd didnt clap for "her mom's birthday" joke..
It's a laugh track, the crowd is a lie
@Plasticide it’s because she said “all my black friend” as in she only has one black friend. It wasn’t funny but that’s what the joke was supposed to be
@Plasticide lol I don’t blame you I barely got it at first either
I got embarrassed lmao💀💀
Jesus christ, i didn’t think I would ever find a comedian this unfunny.
Look up "biceps comedian" and click the first one
Lily Singh
@@jamiemcclymont6745 no no, yu got a point, these two are basically identical
The worst part is they cut the video to show the best clips
These were the best clips !??
Wait she’s a comedian? Oh.
take a shot for every funny joke she makes.
you'll be sober
@@guntherdunyardphd3623 You'll still be alive
Sir it seems you have a negative alcohol level
You're comment is funnier then her.
It's the trick they use at AA meetings to get people to quit drinking.
I'll get drunk by the comment section.
Amy is the type of mother who tells her relatives an embarassing moment of you so she could make them laugh
Yes!
And fails
She's actually a pretty funny person since she's a joke
Had us in the first half, ngl
Jokes have meanings
Lmaoooo
Dead body reported
“Try to laugh 99% fail god level impossible”
😂😭
i failed
those comments are too funny
Is that a laugh track tape?
Nope, live audience
+Alana McConnell must be a disabled audience
Ronan McCann lol keep in mind that basically no one knew of her or about her bad reputation as a "stealer of jokes"
+Alana McConnell If these are stolen jokes she fucked up, because none of them are funny.
+Spartan K It's to remind us to laugh.
Comment section is 1000000x funnier than this video
This made me laugh more than the clip >_
1000000 x 0 is still zero lmao
That's not a hard feat to accomplish
The comment section is +1x100000000000000
I typed "unfunniest women stand up'' and this came up.
Same, but I did "terrible feminist comedy". Strange indeed.
That made me laugh lol
Same but I looked up bad female stand up comedy
Eric Ryan that weird. I’m the only person I’n this comment section under 12 inches.
I typed "female comedians cringe" and this popped up
1. Pedophilia
2. Body shaming
3. Narcissistic
4. Yep, the beauty shaming joke
Can't believe people laugh at this. I felt like dragging my face in the sand.
And yes, that's racism.
Jokes have no boundaries, you can joke about anything... I don’t laugh at her jokes but she should have the freedom to joke about anything... in the scary movie, they have a scene where brenda is killed by other people in the hall trying to watch movies but she kept disturbing... so a black actor doesn’t have a problem with a similar joke... a joke is a joke, it’s not a statement or fact or opinion.
2. She was body shaming her imaginary boyfriend, not a real person...
Every one on the internet is a narcissist, you and me both
@@kaalajamun3741 I agree with you, jokes really doesn't have boundaries. But imagine a man doing this, and then imagine the backlash
@@threzzy comedy is relative my dude, maybe her audience is only rich immature girls... and they like to see a girl doing it, we don't have to watch her but people who bought tickets to her show want to see her so...
0:29
'tomorrow is my moms birthday.... No no don't clap, you don't know know her'
But... nobody clapped?!
That was the joke 💀
R/wooosh
Ur so dumb bro
a person lol just as dumb as her jokes
Chris Mac hahaha so funny get it because she said dont clap but no one clapped 😳😳😳😳 hahaha 😳
5:06 The best part!
hey, but its the end of the vi.... ight; yeah best part...
That is funny as hell
The only part where I laughed
True
you watched the whole video!
I only clicked on this video to read cmnts
0:17 “That’s not a joke, that’s a felony”
- Orangepeanut
Her jokes alone are equal to 3rd degree murder she should be in jail by now
Hey garou
What a douchey, SJW thing to say
@@philippweisang it kinda is a felony tho
@@jawg0 Oh yeah? Didn't know they got rid of the first. Thanks for letting me know judge Judy
The only time I laughed is when I looked down and saw the dislike to like ratio.
Same
Spider-Guy sadly, the balance has been disturbed now. 20K: 15K
Her delivery is so bad dear god.
+Guilherme Müller I actually like her delivery :/
+Bryan Minaya
Yeah, delivery is good, jokes are bad.
+Guilherme Müller *All the people know she only got these roles because her uncle or someone in her family is Chuck Schumer, major politician in the New York CIty area... without him doing some kind of favors, she would not be on this clip right now* ... there's dozens and dozens of better woman comedians, and ones that don't steal jokes either.
+Guilherme Müller OK comedy expert.
+Guilherme Müller HEY it takes time to develop a routine ;-P
The only Conan O'Brien video that has laugh tracks
Right ....because they made some extra special exception for one person after 20 years of having a live audience
Jasmine Houston-Burns real crowd with a laugh sign. Amy Schumer could never get real laughs
How do you know these are tracks?
Mios ohne Bars
It’s Amy Schumer, they can’t be real genuine laughs at minimum
@@miosohnebars8250 because everyone is so synchronized
If I'm ever in a laughable mood and start giggling, I know where to go when I want it to stop. Thanks Amy for always making me realize that not everything is funny.
It will not work if I see the comment section though lol
This comment is funnier than the whole video
Oh god, that felt far too long to watch.
Best part tbh 5:07
Couldn't agree more
I've read almost all comments...this one is by far the best
Lmao😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
U got me
Dude seriously repeated the same joke from three years ago
1:31 she legit stole that from reddit lol
💀💀💀💀💀 but why?
damn imagine being so unfunny you have to steal jokes from reddit
Her joke about wearing a bonnet on the subway.... That was some good Amish Humor ..... get it? .... Amy Schumer). I'll show myself the door.
Gabrielle Capes that joke was better than her stand up
Wish she'd used that joke, better than all her material put together
took me like 80 seconds dude im so slow
yes Amy Schumer sounds like Amish Humor. we get it
Took me a second, but I got it
Clever joke, better than any jokes made by amy schumer
4:25 “Racism is an issue”
“I was hanging out with all my black friend”
*que pre-recorded laugh track*
*proceeds to make jokes using black stereotypes*
That was a terrible joke your right i must admit
SJW much?
Philipp Weisang talking about yourself?
Wow that was actually terrible
The concepts behind the jokes aren’t too bad - but the execution is godawful
"tomorrow is my mother's birthday"
*silent*
"no don't laugh you don't know her!"
*crowd cheering*
what?
Misquoted
“Tomorrow is my mother’s birthday”
*two people clap*
“No, don’t clap, you don’t know her”
*laughs*
It's okay.
R/wooosh
I guarantee shes going to mention something about being a woman and/or overweight.
Oh wow no woman or overweight jokes...her writers must've copied something else.
+Caitlyn Kimberly Other comedians don't get offended when their jokes are used against them.
Yup the victim card as usual.
SlothGiraffe Comedian + getting offended is a recipe for disaster, it's like anti-comedy.
+Plague Doc She is a women, what should she talk about aliens????
I think the audience is real, not to laugh at her jokes, but to laugh at her.
A friend wrote me saying "water be like: wett" and it was funnier than this
and here come the joke-thief jokes
you should research before you accuse
+Christopher Borelli he didn't accuse anyone did you even read his comment
+ToiletClogger1945 Lol, it isn't a joke. It's just true.
I think joke thieves should pay.... For sex
Because she did and it's not a joke and if there was a joke thief joke she would have stole it.
If I was there I’d just shout “you’re not funny”
I dont think anybodys there, the laughs have to be pre recorded
I mean, you are right, but that's still rude.
ALVARO SAIZ SERRA shut up
@@cheekycody ok...
@@yourfriend895 good
Her comedy is literally just "I'm drunk now laugh haha"
When this comment section is funnier than all her stand-ups combined
Lol I was laughing at the comment section not the joes
The comment section is arguably unfunnier
I don't know, today probably?
I think she might have a future in comedy.
+Marc Lemieux wtf?
Anton Pursiainen She had sex with a drunk man. According to the logic of her very own ideology (feminism) that's considered rape. Also she made fun of him for it.
+Adam Farnsworth yeah, most famous people live off of stealing things now, so she might have a chance
Its been common since comedy starting becoming popular. gtfoi
how much of that did she steal?
you should research before you accuse
+Christopher Borelli you should research before you comment
+Tucker K proof?
+Kim Salvagni G to the O to the O to the G to the L to the E
What's that spell? Google.
Google it.
+Abbe Tube all of it cuz someone else wrote it i think
Definitely a laugh track. Wow. Must be nice to have a powerful connections
"how about another joke MURRAY"
"Why did you unsubscribe?"
Amy Schumer
Lol what a brat. Grow up
DubstepinWithSmoke I love you.
+Gillerz100 Then you are an idiot.
Lol he would follow GradeA.
Hope things get better for you man. Cheer up ! :)
+Gillerz100 she gets her material from peeps like you. so keep helping her act.
Damn.... this has more cuts than the emo kid in high school...
This is funny
i laughed at this more then the video
This actually made me sad. I know a ton of people who cut themselves.
BWAAA😂😂😂😂😂
@@hearthebellsring3990
Gonna cry?
Cope harder
When the “professional comedian” is less funny than the host. What’s the point?
In conan's defense, he's pretty effing hilarious.
Everyone: "Keep digging men, we have to find the joke."
The fake audience: "Ha Ha, Amy make funny"
🤣🤣🤣
Who keeps digging men?
The "audience" sounds like a pre-recorded laugh track. So cringey..
Probably is, as that is the only way there could possibly be laughter.
Yes.
It is
Nothing she said was even funny... is this just a laugh track or something?
+hypermetalsonic The only ones laughing are the ones who think she's some kind of hero for social change or whatever. "Ha ha ha" literally translates to "you go girl!"
Well, her delivery was pretty bad. But I thought the paedophile, the abortion and the black friend joke was pretty solid.
Eh, humor is subjective I guess.
Sgt Chickenwing its STOLEN
OG Jatt Probably. But let's be honest, most comedians at least reuse jokes. If you really only want original material, you're basically limiting yourself to the greatest ones, like George Carlin, Andy Kaufman, Richard Pryor etc. And they're all dead.
But where were they taken from? Someone famous?
Sgt Chickenwing she made jokes about a recently passed person when the his best friend was in the audience (a really bad joke may i add) and she has stolen a lot of jokes, you should look it up she is really disgusting
The biggest joke would be calling her a "Comedian"
The 'F' in Amy Schumer stands for funny
She was skinnier then.
+Josh Yeah, she actually used to be kind of attractive
+Josh And more tan.
+Josh I think Amy looks cuter with a little more cushion for the pushin'...
+DoctorPretorious616 agree
+Josh And you are still a nobody like most of us
Wonder who's jokes she stole this time
“Don’t clap “
*literally nobody clapped Lmao* 💀
They didn’t have a clap track 💀
sometimes when my jaw hurts from laughing too much at the mirror
i kickback and watch an amy schumer video so that my jaw can rest and heal.
Before writing and starring in "Inside Amy Schumer" and "Trainwreck," Amy Schumer performed stand-up on CONAN - now on RUclips!
why now?
+Israel Pulido hahahaha yup.
+Bobby Lemon you should research before you accuse.
+Israel Pulido you should research before you accuse
+Christopher Borelli Are you the general of the CopyPaste Army?
just because she is succesful now, everyone is hating.? also that was 5 years ago.. read the title, and calm down.
the hate is cause she steals jokes, dude. not cause she's famous. lol
+SlimxWorm THATS COMEDY!!!! They all steal jokes.
+PowerHouse_ PR No they dont.
Exactly!
0:01 yea, it starts with "i slept"
Kids are always told that they can be anything they want when they grow up, Amy Schumer is living disproof
REST IN PEACE RYAN DUNN.
+Bobby Lemon o neal****
+Wesley Mullens
More like "rest in pieces." Dude was going 160 mph.
+Michael Leibowitz yea. drunk. rest in feces, more likely
***** dunno, but laughing at a dead Ryann Dunn is funnier than anything Amy Schumer has ever done.
+Michael Leibowitz wow did you come up with that on the spot! you are a funny guy! look at yourself in the mirror tonight and tell yourself how much talent you have! the sky is the limit with you my friend
internet is scary place..rabid pack of wolves..
+kaustubh awewwwwwwwwww
KASKKSKWKSKZNAKAXJNSKALWNSNSNA SCJSND S RAWERRWE RARATATWAER (rabid wolf noises)
Kakaknaashahahah kashiwa kashdhshsbsaaaanana (more rabid wolf noises)
+kaustubh for real though. I think she's pretty funny ahaha
+kaustubh Are you going to cry? I feel like you're going to cry a little bit. Almost like a little baby.
Just imagine when she said “I’m pretty drunk right now”, somebody from the audience yelled “OH THAAAT’S WHY”
Nobody:
Amy Schumer: LoL Sex Jokes lmao
Damn you people hold a grudge. lol. This set wasn't _that_ horrid.
Most likely because someone else wrote it. But still...
+SavannahDarlink I mean...she started this off with a statutory rape joke. Wouldn't put it past her to take advantage of a drunk guy.
+Quan Dang well I don't think making jokes about offensive things means you would do those things but in this case It doesn't help her case after she openly admitted to doing it.
SavannahDarlink Was this stand-up before or after she admitted it? Because if it was after the fact, then joking about rape shows no remorse...
Quan Dang This is from before she admitted it but after she did it to him.
People only hate because the title mentioned "Amy Schumer" That's it. It's cool to hate on her these days
Lol I just laughed when she said we think she's so perfect
10 out of 10 comedy gold.
That's what I rate the comment section as.
Seeing a horse on a balcony is funnier than Amy Schumer
IM WATCHING THIS UNDER THE SHEETS AT NIGHT AND THE BRIGHT FLASHES HURT MY EYES
Walrus Paul ok good.. I thought it was lighting from outside
Omg same
Oh I thought I was going blind form cringing too hard
james Corduroy you nailed it
The bad jokes are hurting my ears
The one thing about this that made me laugh is the fact that she came up with those jokes and decided they’re not only good enough to write down, but also to present to an audience
The Audience: 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣
Me The Entire video: 😐
That " high school crush " joke was clearly stolen from a stand up of young Bob Saget in 1984 . The video is available on RUclips.
" I'm a happy man , I just got married to my girlfriend of seven years . Thank you , thank you ....that's her age , I'm going to jail ."
thats nowhere near to the joke she made. his joke was about him marrying a 7 year old and her joke was about sleeping with a highschool boy. but yeah neither are really that funny just saying she didnt really copy that one just cuz its an underage joke :/
@@kristen3715 maybe maybe not.
There 27 minutes video on RUclips her joke stealing and materials
@@kristen3715 - knowing her, it's still just a recycled Bob Saget joke - but yeah, you're right, she usually steals her jokes verbatim. Weird :/
Amy "Carlos Mencia" Schumer
savage. 😂
Who's that?
+Whiskey Tango Foxtrot The Schumo-wrestler
+Willear Glimniene the fish sticks guy
Amy "Carlos MenStealer" Schumer
"It's my mom's birthday" *no claps* "Stop clapping you dont know her".... Comic gold
I’m pretty sure she’s the only comedian that needs a laugh track
Amy: tomorrow is my mom’s birthday
*no applause*
Amy: *No don’t clap you don’t know her*
I knew this comment section would be a cesspool, but damn.
This comment is underrated.
Well played sir, well played
Try not to laugh easy mode
Try to laugh impossible mode
@@the_bassiah the comments or the vid
@@lamyshamy5167 the vid
Surprising they shot a laugh track for the background, even a sex tape playing in the background would suit this better.
"tomorrow's my mums birthday"
* silence *
"no don't clap"
Bad move Coco, internet is out on Amy.
Not saying she cant use her own jokes over and over, but this is literally the set she did in one of her specials. I guess she didnt have time to come up with a new 5 minutes? I guess that's what fame does to comics.
This was in 2011 so it might have been before that special but either way a lot of comedians reuse bits, its not until they're ready for a new special that they toss the old ones
+Gregapher Look at the date. This was from 2011...
+Jenny Thorson You're right, I didnt notice that this was from an earlier date. And I think the special these jokes are from was in 2012, so that's my bad.
I laughed more when my dog died
*nobody claps* “no don’t clap”
"I'll get us a cab" lmao
Teen Mom, or if you're from the south, Mom.
I AM D E C E A S E D
She knows how to kill the mood.
I havent cried in years, and this made me cry in the first minute.
I really want to end this misery.
Kill me.
Please tell me someone has granted your request.
Be happy to help you with that !! Im sure your hate will kill u soon enough ...or sadly ....not...
Jesus, can everybody just take a goddamn chill pill?
A chill pill, are you serious?? Gadaffi was just killed and Obama needs to find his birth certificate. ...it's 2011 and you want to relax, ahhhhhh!!!
+Hadi Mahmood LMAO
+theweirdguy124 And a joke thief
+TheDebbyG Take a chill pill, that's a good one...Amy should use it!
No one is angry to take a pill chill, it's all opinion expression. And not all feedback will be positive.
He looks like the guys from the hills....have eyes.
Lmaooo
0:00-0:00 is the best joke lmaoooooooo 😂
Stop yelling we're not at the movies...yes she did lol 🤣🤣🤣
"i'm not racist" ah well
Caterina Gullone she purposely said that. You obviously didn't get her sarcasm.
Marie-Lynn Issa
But she's legitimately racist
Marie-Lynn Issa except nothing indicated it was sarcasm. She just said racist stuff and we're supposed to laugh. Her delivery is just terrible
Omg shut up im black and didnt get offended i though it was actually funny it a joke calm down
Raykwun Hunter
It doesn't matter if it was offensive it was still considered racist
"Temembe" 😂 lmao
6:02 best part hahaha
Jesus I’ve never heard a “comedian” that was so unfunny
I'm soooo excited! I love hearing Patrice O'Neal jokes!
I have just watched her for the first time and I laughed more at a piece of toast falling than this entire thing.
Jesus has never been so appauled
Imagine looking up unfunny comedians and this pops up as the first result on google... gotta love the accuracy.
Her face literally does come up, lol