When my wife told me she had been sleeping with another man for 6 months, I lost consciousness. The shock was so strong, it literally shut my brain off. My life plan was shattered in an instant. Peterson is bang on with this assessment and it hurts, just hearing him describe the pain I experienced. This man is wise.
Well... I am naturally a very trusting guy. I'm not sure I had ever been betrayed before, certainly not like this, and it rocked me to my core. I lost friends in the weeks following, because I started accusing them of things they hadn't done. I went from being very easy going, to being very suspicious. It took a long time speaking with councillors and attending marriage counselling before I was able to believe anything anyone told me. Peterson is right, I didn't know who I was anymore, everything about me was turned upside down. I was a goof, a fool, gullible, and easily manipulated. I had to retrace my entire life and reevaluate all my past decisions and I actually believed that I had been sleep walking for 25 years. It's been just over 9 years since the affair, and yeah... Peterson's lecture here still hit home.
TheRazzaManazza Thank you for sharing. Peterson describes the emptiness, that shock so precisely. I was utterly dumbfounded upon learning about my husbands addiction. I knew he had a dark side but believed him when he said he was finished with drugs. The day we went to marriage counseling, I further discovered he had never quit cocaine. For better or worse, his betrayal and smugness toward me shook me to my core and forced my own self evaluation. Your brain doesn’t stop with the onslaught of questions-why did you let it happen? - were you so naive , so gullible? You were hoodwinked. By a con man-plain and simple” I know that I cared for him to the point that I stopped listening to my rational self. Hope you are on the road back to yourself. Don’t know where or what I would be without the RUclips community.
@@kelley0404 Sorry to hear about your husband's addiction. I went through something very similar when I found out about my brothers addiction to cocaine and ultimately heroin and fentanyl. How? When? We were brought up in a happy, loving, caring home full of support and role models. I thought I knew him well. I can't imagine what that would be been like for you. Thanks, yes I'm well adjusted and have dealt with the pain of the affair. I'm still married to her, 20 years together this year. 2009, 10 years ago this November was when I found out.
@Zaid Syed I attended councilling to repair my self confidence. We attended marriage councilling together. I listened to, and analyzed my dreams/nightmares. Patience. Time. She had to reassure me many times over the months and years, about many things. It helped that the guy was a loser, it would have been difficult if he was successful and attractive. It also helped that I fully learned and understood my wife's mental state at the time of the affair. I think part of it may have been realizing and accepting my own faults as well. Noticing that I wasn't some innocent saint, void of any faults and transgressions. Sorry for the point form answer... I'm on the way out the door to go ice fishing. Haha. Have a good day you guys.
Yes, my gf just betrayed the FUCK out of my trust. And I cut all my friends out to be with her so now I'm alone, since I have 0 trust with her, i CANT keep going forward with her. But I'm friendless and alone so it's hard, but trust me.... USE TIME LIKE THIS TO BETTER YOURSELF AND PEOPLE WILL COME. TRUE FRIENDS WILL COME. that is what I'm going with. It's tough, but we can all make it through it
Tesla referenced human energy 🌬👻jesus christ referenced living waters 💎👩🎓👨🎓science described water memory 🌊👨🎨👩🎨existence reflecting psychologically, psalms16:24 k,j 👻💎👩🎓👨🎓💖🗽🤍🧮🗡🛡⚖☄🌪🧮🌬
Betrayal/infidelity has got to be one of the worst experiences to endure. You get catapulted onto a journey into the underworld where there's no quick fix or easy way out, you have to go thru it in order to escape it. Your very being becomes a stranger, how you view life is forever changed. It is amazing people are able to come through it and function again. JP describes the chaotic state very succinctly.
I'nm just waiting for it to end.... probably don't even really like that person anymore, it's just some mind fantom playing tricks..... and in reality there are quite some people who are a lot better suited....... it's just the tricks they play to stay on top and control their subordinates to keep me like a prisoner and a slave.....
I experienced that about two years ago, had to heal myself alone.. everything transformed in to an absolute confusion,in order to heal you have to change your past, present, future, old character, your view of the world, your friends family, all memories from different situations.. i dont hope this to happen even to my worst enemies, little by little starting to cure 💪
@@SaschaEderer Youre talking about the cartel videos? Or the uncensored ISIS beheading videos? Human trafficking? Elaborate. I am well aware and have seen some of them aswell. In the end, it all starts with betrayal And its subjective either ways what you perceive as the worst a human can do. Thats why I said "finally someone agrees with me"
@@SaschaEdererI have read up on the things some humans do to one another and I still think that betrayal, occurring between people who share a high level trust in a close relationship is the worst thing that can happen to a person who lives through it.
I have watched and listen to him for almost a year....he is the Aristotle of our time.... His intellect..his perception..his logic...his facts....his studies...his life......his being...
Half the time he gets lost in the sauce while trying to go deep. Instead of condensing the sauce for us to dissect ourselves. Poverty in imagination and lack of attention... he lacks attention.
@@Ray2311us yeah its called thinking, he shares his perspective in real-time. just because you get lost doesn't mean people don't benefit from his intellect.
Two days ago I found out that my girlfriend, who I wanted to ask to marry me next month, had been sleeping with her colleague the last 9 months. Everything went blank, I needed support to stand up. Then when I looked back at her I felt so terrified , everything we had been building up togetger for 4 years crumbled into pieces. All those years it was paradise but it just took an instant to be transported to the deepest hole of hell. Jordan Petersin is right, betrayal is the worst thing that can happend to someone.
It took me six MONTHS to recover from what Jordan is talking about. I was pretty much out of my body and bed ridden for much of it. My wife stood by me. I was betrayed not once but TWICE by the very people I helped build up. It cost me more than a million dollars but I'm here. What I wish he mentioned was how betrayal is parasitic in nature and benign most of the time until it is too late and once the host has been depleted, the parasite disposes of the body and moves onto a fresh victim, free from guilt and punishment... at least, that's what they think. Believe me when I say you never want to go to the depths of hell only to resurface and allow yourself to be plunged in again. It's not a pleasant experience. Where I am now, nobody who fucked with me then is foolish enough to try it again. And just as well as they'd suffer eternally. Not that all is forgiven but we've been taught that to err is human and to forgive is divine but I'd add that hell is never full and you'll find a line of people a billion strong that are still desperate to be there anyway and, sadly, at any cost. I am not among them but I know who they are and there's no coming back from that.
Its the questioning all past events with your betrayer", reassessing them as a whole different person--and by extension reassessment of your whole life as a whole different phenomenon. That replaying hamster wheel, in your head, is what drives depression and pain. Somehow coming back to the here and now is essential, yet so slow and difficult.
betrayal is one of the worst things that can happen to a human. you tend to lose faith in people and if that happens to you at a high frequency in ur life (if you are unfortunate enough!) that is a very very bad thing to happen to you. you may never recover to trust humans again
@@thecorruptversionSolution is depend and pray to God. He will protect you. He will tell you who to trust. He will remove bad people from your life and give you good people. "God" is the solution
I haven't recovered from the multiple betrayal(s) I have gone through. Years after....my wounds have not healed. I now understand what it means to be a 'dead soul'. 💀
The wound never heals, but as JP might say, once you learn how to live with the wound, one is changed and more powerful to deal with the world, to help others avoid the same pitfalls, and to help others cope with their wounds. Also from JP, unwillingly, through necessity, one goes from being a defenseless rabbit to having the capacities of a monster. 💪
@2:14 Trust & Betrayal @3:02 In dangerous place presently, map/past is profoundly incorrect & compass that got me here isn’t trustworthy to get me there (somewhere good/safe). @3:36 Inversion @4:48 Collapse
My girl betrayed me over and over from the begining and I stayed for 3 years caus she kept promising she would stop she kept begging me to stay saying she loved me and everything and now I'm a dead soul pushing everyday to continue to build my future even tho she damn near destroyed me. But I tell you what anyone going through this pain it will only get better if you decide you want it to and take it step by step til one day you realize your life is better than ever. Eat healthy exercise stay away from alcohol and drugs pray love watch things that make you laught keep your hygiene up work on making more money than ever etc. Wether you say you can ot you can't you're right. Make sure you always say you can. All of us can overcome whatever the situation. Personally I cant wait to become the best version of myself ever. Gonna be hard af but time goes by fast so it's all good
Betrayal is THE WORST, when you love someone who isn't who they say they are. I was So deceived, definitely got a tug from the underworld, and not sure how God pulled me from the clutches of death...
Jordan Peterson saved my life. I was on the verge of suicide after a deeply traumatic, life-destroying betrayal when he inexplicably popped up on my feed. His lectures saved my life by breaking me out of my traumatised state of life. He is a godsend
I love this segment. I'm going through something with a wife a 35 years who suddenly left and filed for divorce after 3 weeks of separation. We rarely if ever argued in fact they were more like difficult discussions about once every couple years. Never required counseling. No infidelity, alcohol, drugs, etc.. just a bizarre overreaction to one of our discussions. She has been a pretty unhappy person since her twin sister died 6 years ago. Also she likely be had empty nest syndrome really bad as well for 13 years. Worst part she went no contact. I've been trying to help her but she is drowning and trying to take me down with her as well. We are in our golden years and are set financially but will be destroyed separately. Really sad.
The challenge to this wisdom is to be able to access it when the actual tragedy occurs, at the exact moment of chaos an illusionary shadow of doubt and worthlessness takes over. I find that it is most useful in retrospect, in that aftermath of the tragedy, at times of reflection...
I’ve always been cheated on, my father is a porn addict, and now the love of my life’s porn addiction has risen to the surface bigger than ever. He switches between narcissism and empathy. He is fighting and we are getting help but he doesn’t even realize how him watching porn over and over and lying about it is extremely hurtful, not just because of my past pain but it’s a real pain regardless
This reminds me of someone I was close too a few months ago. I thought we were in a relationship and then she said she wanted to be friends or fwb . we went as a big group to a concert and she got with a guy literally right in front of me and started introducing in front of everyone. This was very painful as she literally she said she liked me a week before hand. Fuckin hurts because one minute you could be in a relationship or a 'thing' and next minute feel betrayed by someone close to you. It messed me up for a few months not gonna lie
I can relate man. My co worker and I had a thing a while ago and I thought something good was really going to occur from it. She asked me to go to a wedding with her and it was an amazing experience. She ended up sleeping with a guy a week after the wedding and I was devastated. Even though we weren’t technically dating it rattled me to the core.
Thank you for explaining some very heavy things in a way that is easy to comprehend & is very validating and empowering. I hailed from a bad seed pod that was cultivated in a bad seed crop. They're not criminal, but void of conscience & empathy. "Betrayal" should have been my birth family's name.
Thank you sir for helping our youth wake up and fight against evil to save their souls and the light of God in Christ that our father in Heaven formed in us when he created us and gave us life ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤
Love JP But couldn't help notice he slid his wedding ring up and down his finger then twisted right as he mentioned snakes.... my heart goes out to you brother
My girlfriend of 6 years told me out of nowhere she doesnt know if she wants to be with me anymore and wants to leave me. She has said multiple times there is no one else. But the betrayal still feels like this
Hang in there man. You don't want to be with someone who isn't ALL IN. What difference is there if it's due to someone else or just apathy. You deserve someone who wants you?
Deirdre Morris Honestly? I wouldn’t waste another minute of your life by hoping things might change. Even if they did, it wouldn’t be for long... Please don’t put yourself through any more heartache, and let her go... Oh it’s going to hurt like hell; but this would be the best thing you could do for YOU. You deserve to have someone who loves you...who you can trust 100% I hope all goes well for you. God bless you!
Hell yeah it hurts but that wasn't the only pain when you lose your best friend your girlfriend and your son and your job that's paying my friend that I hope none of you have through this house I'm sitting in used to be alive and now it's fucking dead. Everybody's your friend you have something to offer but you have very few friends and everything is gone but here's the thing going through all that pain hurt for years makes you strong strong inside and you may see tears you may hear storiesbut they come back stronger than the letdown. Don't ever laugh at anybody that has a big heart because they've been through more pain than you'll ever have in your life the end
I'm thinking humans are cursed with knowledge and ignorance. Constantly attacked by uninitiated experience. Without any malevelance at all,You make monumental choices and decisions void of the full realisation or understanding of their impact on you and others.
Betrayal is the worst thing in my life. I dated a girl in high school and it was great. We both got accepted into the same dream college for our majors. We went, she developed bipolar 1 out of state. She cheated, partied, screamed at me constantly, hated me. Very manipulative. No moral or ethical range. Out of nowhere. I dealt with it because I was in a new state no friends and just knew one person. Turns out I never made long lasting friendships and that relationship ended badly 4 years later. It sucks going to bed knowing nobody would know If you somehow died or had an accident. I was in this state alone. Lost everything but my college education. I’m a senior now. I moved back home. A friend betrayed me recently just this past month and called me nasty things. My friend group associated with him are leaving my life slowly. He’s a drug addict for coke, oxy, weed, shrooms etc. My friends know all that but still things are weird. I’m on month 2 completely alone I haven’t seen anyone. I’m trying to rebuild myself I guess I don’t know. I’m lost. I’m only 22 and have been through this “underworld” many many times. Another being my random type 1 diabetes diagnoses. Life long horrible disease.
At only 21 myself I may not be able to offer the wisest advice. I would say you’re only 22, life is full of endless possibilities especially when we are young. Think of the vast changes from 0-22 and imagine the changes from 22-40 you have the power to build positivity around yourself and achieve any goals you set! Just keep going forward you can’t change the past you just have to try and learn from it 👌
When you don't know what to do , "pray". And when you think you are alone or have no support. You are wrong. God is rooting for you. More power to you.
Peterson is damned well correct!! I know, I know that betrayal is worse than death!! I would have rather had my brother kill me than what he did to me!!!! on the other side of it, what he did made me look good at myself. and today I am a better person. but it still hurts and will for the rest of my life!!
My first betrayal - from birth and on, when my parents created the most toxic household for us, with constant arguing, fighting and bickering. I mean - at all times they were together. The second betrayal was, at 6 years old my parents left me with grandma for more than two years, I was devastated... the next one when my father got to jail for some shoplifting, and after some hardship, my mom brought me and my two young siblings to the orphanage, where I spent 5 .5 years. After I graduated school in orphanage, and reunited with my parents at age of 18, not knowing where else to go, the toxicity of fights and unhealthy relationship between my mom and dad continued , ignoring hard it did to us. So I finally left home and moved to another city. By then, I was immune to betrayals, trust me, if it possible at all. It became something so to say normal, a part of my life. I used to it. I would hurt again and again, and just suck it up. People don't treat me right, I used to it. If they do, I would sabotage our relationship, mostly subconsciously. I believe deeply in my soul that I do not deserve any better because my parents thought so. (((
That must have been hell to go thru. Every child deserves loving, caring parents. You are still young and can rebuild your life. With time you will learn how healthy relationships work and how to pick loyal friends. There are lots of free resources out there to teach yourself what your parents failed to show you with actions. It's up to you to break the generational curse. I wish you peace and love.
The speech is just so briliantly eye opening. But i just have one comment: the underworld he talks about can not be the hell. Because, at least mythologically, hell is the representation of the space where you are supposed to get as a consequence of *your own* acts. Or betrayal is the action of someone else that pushes you in no second in this space of chaos, in this underworld as he calls it. But thats not the hell. It can not be. Whats your fault/mistake here? That you trusted? So trust is a mistake that would potentially lead you to hell? Well we can also look at things this way but then it comes at clash with what he says at the beginning. Then how to get organized and get along with each other if trust doesnt emerge from us as "cimpanzees full of snakes"? If trusting is THE mistake we do in this equation then we are all doomed to hell no matter what because trust is implicitly needed, the prerequisite for basic interactions with each other as he wonderfully explains. So what pushes you into the chaos? Trusting or being betrayed? I guess its a matter of where you want to place the guilt. If on you (having trusted, being this naive thing - but then how else?) or on others (who betrayed you without you having done anything wrong). But thats a harsh conflict that emerges in you as a human being.
That is very true Professor. If a person is wise and you know how the manner of trust you can give to a person you are negotiating and dealing with is good , so there is always a secure half of yourself that always reserved.No matter may happen there is always savings of assurance about your security like affidavit a proof of strongly have power or sworn if ever any tragic may happen you will never lose , you might get fool but there is power or proof advocate to save what can get to you....God bless Professor Jordan Peterson and more power...
Axiom of Ttust i) most powerful economic currency ii) all professional and personal relationships are predicated on trust iii) Mistrust breeds chaos but is ameliorated by calm observation with a bird’s eye view.
The problem with me is that I don’t trust anyone , but at the same time I like things to unfold before me , I don’t like controlling my partner even if I believe the betrayal is going to take place , I instead of preventing it sooner I let in happen that way I know really who the person is and their capacity for evil .
My partner left me after our 8-year relationship and 5-year IVF journey coming to an end. Then, I found out that he is already with our neighbor less than a month of break up. When I look back, I realise that it started several months before our breakup. At that time, I was still undergoing IVF treatment and going through a lot of suffering. Meanwhile, he had already made plan B & C for alternative options while I was desperately hoping for a successful transfer. I was too naive, there were some signs but I thought I were too sensitive. I feel completely lost and confused. I don't know what went wrong and when. He was kind and nice to me until the very last moment. Was he just pretending to be good? I don't know which one is the real him.
I was betrayed by my therapist and found myself torn apart. I think the reason betrayal was so painful was the division inside: I had to take time off work, pay money, believe and take risks and want to grow in order to relate better to people. When he sexually abused me for his lust, then betrayed the romantic attachment, then lied about it, he took what was healthy in me and destroyed it and left fear, bitterness, rage and hurt in it's place - along with the feeling that I could not trust anyone because who do you go to when your parents abused you, your country ignores the abuse, school avoids the abuse and then the person you go to for healing betrays you as well?
Be strong. Get up and keep your shoulders straight. And walk with your life. Get way from negative and toxic people. You will find nice people. Just never trust to no one 100%.
Great speech! It is sad, but betrayal exists even in our society. The examples could be the cases when some authorities or election campaigns do not do what they promised to do. Actually, we can the examples in our childhood from the family institution when our parents do not answer your question, pay attention, help. In this case, children often try to forgive them, thinking that they can one day look at them differently or some children begin to behave themselves accordingly (hurt others). if it comes to social institutions I really do not know what problems they have, but they by promising the great future and then falling them down they make it hard for people to believe. If all of this is not betrayal then what do we call it? P.s in my opinion, everyone should respect someone else`s feeling, and before you promise something (think twice, or better 10 times), make sure that you are able to do it.
Good Lord...early Peterson is some hair raising zssszaszzz! Betrayal can only come from those we revere, love, like or respect/trust. When it goes...man...thats a straight up tectonic shift.
He is saying that, of course, everyone wants to be in the walled Garden of Eden. In the walled garden, you are safer and can relax and build for the future. However, the dragon of chaos is always outside the garden wall -- and the snake in the garden is the reminder that even the safest of places harbors the possibility of chaos and also reminds that the dragon is waiting outside. In other lectures he talks more about what chaos and the dragon mean although he touches on it here: out of chaos comes new beginnings (the dragon must be slayed to get to the treasure.) If this is interesting to you, his lecture series on Genesis are very good.
When my wife told me she had been sleeping with another man for 6 months, I lost consciousness. The shock was so strong, it literally shut my brain off. My life plan was shattered in an instant. Peterson is bang on with this assessment and it hurts, just hearing him describe the pain I experienced. This man is wise.
Well... I am naturally a very trusting guy. I'm not sure I had ever been betrayed before, certainly not like this, and it rocked me to my core. I lost friends in the weeks following, because I started accusing them of things they hadn't done. I went from being very easy going, to being very suspicious. It took a long time speaking with councillors and attending marriage counselling before I was able to believe anything anyone told me. Peterson is right, I didn't know who I was anymore, everything about me was turned upside down. I was a goof, a fool, gullible, and easily manipulated. I had to retrace my entire life and reevaluate all my past decisions and I actually believed that I had been sleep walking for 25 years. It's been just over 9 years since the affair, and yeah... Peterson's lecture here still hit home.
TheRazzaManazza
Thank you for sharing. Peterson describes the emptiness, that shock so precisely. I was utterly dumbfounded upon learning about my husbands addiction. I knew he had a dark side but believed him when he said he was finished with drugs. The day we went to marriage counseling, I further discovered he had never quit cocaine. For better or worse, his betrayal and smugness toward me shook me to my core and forced my own self evaluation. Your brain doesn’t stop with the onslaught of questions-why did you let it happen? - were you so naive , so gullible? You were hoodwinked. By a con man-plain and simple”
I know that I cared for him to the point that I stopped listening to my rational self.
Hope you are on the road back to yourself. Don’t know where or what I would be without the RUclips community.
@@kelley0404 Sorry to hear about your husband's addiction. I went through something very similar when I found out about my brothers addiction to cocaine and ultimately heroin and fentanyl. How? When? We were brought up in a happy, loving, caring home full of support and role models. I thought I knew him well. I can't imagine what that would be been like for you.
Thanks, yes I'm well adjusted and have dealt with the pain of the affair. I'm still married to her, 20 years together this year. 2009, 10 years ago this November was when I found out.
@@kelley0404 he's a druggie always will be. Hopefully he does what a druggie should do
@Zaid Syed I attended councilling to repair my self confidence. We attended marriage councilling together. I listened to, and analyzed my dreams/nightmares. Patience. Time. She had to reassure me many times over the months and years, about many things. It helped that the guy was a loser, it would have been difficult if he was successful and attractive. It also helped that I fully learned and understood my wife's mental state at the time of the affair. I think part of it may have been realizing and accepting my own faults as well. Noticing that I wasn't some innocent saint, void of any faults and transgressions. Sorry for the point form answer... I'm on the way out the door to go ice fishing. Haha. Have a good day you guys.
I can't stop watching his videos. My world is being destroyed and rebuilt.
Me too.... both points... hugs dear one
#stayhard
Yes, my gf just betrayed the FUCK out of my trust. And I cut all my friends out to be with her so now I'm alone, since I have 0 trust with her, i CANT keep going forward with her. But I'm friendless and alone so it's hard, but trust me.... USE TIME LIKE THIS TO BETTER YOURSELF AND PEOPLE WILL COME. TRUE FRIENDS WILL COME. that is what I'm going with. It's tough, but we can all make it through it
I love how Jordan said, if you are surrounded by snakes, become the master of snakes.
computerbiscuit 🥳🥳
th-under world ^^
Or just get out of there 🤔
Tesla referenced human energy 🌬👻jesus christ referenced living waters 💎👩🎓👨🎓science described water memory 🌊👨🎨👩🎨existence reflecting psychologically, psalms16:24 k,j 👻💎👩🎓👨🎓💖🗽🤍🧮🗡🛡⚖☄🌪🧮🌬
You
Betrayal/infidelity has got to be one of the worst experiences to endure. You get catapulted onto a journey into the underworld where there's no quick fix or easy way out, you have to go thru it in order to escape it. Your very being becomes a stranger, how you view life is forever changed. It is amazing people are able to come through it and function again. JP describes the chaotic state very succinctly.
I'nm just waiting for it to end.... probably don't even really like that person anymore, it's just some mind fantom playing tricks..... and in reality there are quite some people who are a lot better suited....... it's just the tricks they play to stay on top and control their subordinates to keep me like a prisoner and a slave.....
🧡
Yes , and there are different levels of malice and negligence to complicate the betrayal .
I experienced that about two years ago, had to heal myself alone.. everything transformed in to an absolute confusion,in order to heal you have to change your past, present, future, old character, your view of the world, your friends family, all memories from different situations.. i dont hope this to happen even to my worst enemies, little by little starting to cure 💪
Finally. Someone agrees with me of rating betrayal as the worst a human can do to another.
You’d only say that because you haven’t read up on the actual worst things which the actual worst humans of our society do.
@@SaschaEderer Youre talking about the cartel videos? Or the uncensored ISIS beheading videos?
Human trafficking? Elaborate.
I am well aware and have seen some of them aswell.
In the end, it all starts with betrayal
And its subjective either ways what you perceive as the worst a human can do. Thats why I said "finally someone agrees with me"
@@SaschaEdererI have read up on the things some humans do to one another and I still think that betrayal, occurring between people who share a high level trust in a close relationship is the worst thing that can happen to a person who lives through it.
@@jessieessex If you actually did it and if you actually mean it, that’s a lie.
@@SaschaEderer Betrayed can lead to hurt and it can mess you up
I have watched and listen to him for almost a year....he is the Aristotle of our time....
His intellect..his perception..his logic...his facts....his studies...his life......his being...
Half the time he gets lost in the sauce while trying to go deep. Instead of condensing the sauce for us to dissect ourselves. Poverty in imagination and lack of attention... he lacks attention.
@@Ray2311us yeah its called thinking, he shares his perspective in real-time. just because you get lost doesn't mean people don't benefit from his intellect.
Two days ago I found out that my girlfriend, who I wanted to ask to marry me next month, had been sleeping with her colleague the last 9 months. Everything went blank, I needed support to stand up. Then when I looked back at her I felt so terrified , everything we had been building up togetger for 4 years crumbled into pieces. All those years it was paradise but it just took an instant to be transported to the deepest hole of hell.
Jordan Petersin is right, betrayal is the worst thing that can happend to someone.
How are you now?
How did you overcome that? I’m going through something similar and any advice would be super helpful
It took me six MONTHS to recover from what Jordan is talking about. I was pretty much out of my body and bed ridden for much of it. My wife stood by me. I was betrayed not once but TWICE by the very people I helped build up. It cost me more than a million dollars but I'm here. What I wish he mentioned was how betrayal is parasitic in nature and benign most of the time until it is too late and once the host has been depleted, the parasite disposes of the body and moves onto a fresh victim, free from guilt and punishment... at least, that's what they think.
Believe me when I say you never want to go to the depths of hell only to resurface and allow yourself to be plunged in again. It's not a pleasant experience.
Where I am now, nobody who fucked with me then is foolish enough to try it again. And just as well as they'd suffer eternally. Not that all is forgiven but we've been taught that to err is human and to forgive is divine but I'd add that hell is never full and you'll find a line of people a billion strong that are still desperate to be there anyway and, sadly, at any cost.
I am not among them but I know who they are and there's no coming back from that.
Its the questioning all past events with your betrayer", reassessing them as a whole different person--and by extension reassessment of your whole life as a whole different phenomenon. That replaying hamster wheel, in your head, is what drives depression and pain. Somehow coming back to the here and now is essential, yet so slow and difficult.
So true....you have to question all past events and reassess them. It’s shocking.
This honestly got me through a really tough time, and I’d just like to say thank you to Dr. Peterson.
betrayal is one of the worst things that can happen to a human. you tend to lose faith in people and if that happens to you at a high frequency in ur life (if you are unfortunate enough!) that is a very very bad thing to happen to you. you may never recover to trust humans again
Yes I know.
Remember humans are pieces of shit and only care about themselves and have low expectations for humans
@TheLawDemon well put, but, any solutions?
@@thecorruptversionSolution is depend and pray to God. He will protect you. He will tell you who to trust. He will remove bad people from your life and give you good people. "God" is the solution
@@Karina-qt2nedur the durrrr
I haven't recovered from the multiple betrayal(s) I have gone through. Years after....my wounds have not healed. I now understand what it means to be a 'dead soul'. 💀
My gosh, me too.
Me too.
Same here
The wound never heals, but as JP might say, once you learn how to live with the wound, one is changed and more powerful to deal with the world, to help others avoid the same pitfalls, and to help others cope with their wounds. Also from JP, unwillingly, through necessity, one goes from being a defenseless rabbit to having the capacities of a monster. 💪
@2:14 Trust & Betrayal
@3:02 In dangerous place presently, map/past is profoundly incorrect & compass that got me here isn’t trustworthy to get me there (somewhere good/safe).
@3:36 Inversion
@4:48 Collapse
Thumbs up for no commercial and useful information.
My girl betrayed me over and over from the begining and I stayed for 3 years caus she kept promising she would stop she kept begging me to stay saying she loved me and everything and now I'm a dead soul pushing everyday to continue to build my future even tho she damn near destroyed me. But I tell you what anyone going through this pain it will only get better if you decide you want it to and take it step by step til one day you realize your life is better than ever. Eat healthy exercise stay away from alcohol and drugs pray love watch things that make you laught keep your hygiene up work on making more money than ever etc. Wether you say you can ot you can't you're right. Make sure you always say you can. All of us can overcome whatever the situation. Personally I cant wait to become the best version of myself ever. Gonna be hard af but time goes by fast so it's all good
Betrayal is THE WORST, when you love someone who isn't who they say they are. I was So deceived, definitely got a tug from the underworld, and not sure how God pulled me from the clutches of death...
Angie Taylor The Lord has you safe in His hands 🙏
That’s why u got to be with someone who value u
Jordan Peterson saved my life. I was on the verge of suicide after a deeply traumatic, life-destroying betrayal when he inexplicably popped up on my feed. His lectures saved my life by breaking me out of my traumatised state of life. He is a godsend
I love this segment. I'm going through something with a wife a 35 years who suddenly left and filed for divorce after 3 weeks of separation. We rarely if ever argued in fact they were more like difficult discussions about once every couple years. Never required counseling. No infidelity, alcohol, drugs, etc.. just a bizarre overreaction to one of our discussions. She has been a pretty unhappy person since her twin sister died 6 years ago. Also she likely be had empty nest syndrome really bad as well for 13 years.
Worst part she went no contact. I've been trying to help her but she is drowning and trying to take me down with her as well. We are in our golden years and are set financially but will be destroyed separately. Really sad.
Wish you both the best.
Sorry for you my friend, plenty of single people looking for love. Nothing wrong with finding another happy eelationship
Bloody brilliant man
My sister preyed on my naïvete, and this man described my hellish week
Love Him
Love God
The challenge to this wisdom is to be able to access it when the actual tragedy occurs, at the exact moment of chaos an illusionary shadow of doubt and worthlessness takes over. I find that it is most useful in retrospect, in that aftermath of the tragedy, at times of reflection...
“Chimpanzee full of snakes, thats what a human being is”
He says he thinks in words and not pictures, but it’s quite telling how he moves his hands romantically as if to shape clay into visions.
I love Jordan, I hear his words now time and again and they sound like music to me when he speaks like this
How about the betrayal from parents?
This cuts way too close to the bone.
Trust is the fundamental foundation between any 2 individuals if you are together for any reasons.
He is gold 💝
Ordinary moments in our life become extraordinary by the scars they leave.
I certainly went to the end of the underworld/hell when my husband betrayed me after 35 yrs of loving and caring for him!
Grace G
I hear you.
Sorry for you
So sorry. Same for me. ❤❤❤
I’ve always been cheated on, my father is a porn addict, and now the love of my life’s porn addiction has risen to the surface bigger than ever. He switches between narcissism and empathy. He is fighting and we are getting help but he doesn’t even realize how him watching porn over and over and lying about it is extremely hurtful, not just because of my past pain but it’s a real pain regardless
This reminds me of someone I was close too a few months ago. I thought we were in a relationship and then she said she wanted to be friends or fwb . we went as a big group to a concert and she got with a guy literally right in front of me and started introducing in front of everyone. This was very painful as she literally she said she liked me a week before hand. Fuckin hurts because one minute you could be in a relationship or a 'thing' and next minute feel betrayed by someone close to you. It messed me up for a few months not gonna lie
I can relate man. My co worker and I had a thing a while ago and I thought something good was really going to occur from it. She asked me to go to a wedding with her and it was an amazing experience. She ended up sleeping with a guy a week after the wedding and I was devastated. Even though we weren’t technically dating it rattled me to the core.
@@juanfernandez1585 hey man we just need to realise those women just ain't worth it ,let's make them regret what they did by improving ourselves
Thank you for explaining some very heavy things in a way that is easy to comprehend & is very validating and empowering.
I hailed from a bad seed pod that was cultivated in a bad seed crop.
They're not criminal, but void of conscience & empathy.
"Betrayal" should have been my birth family's name.
Absolutely fantastic.
I find it very hard to trust people 😫
4:07 how damaged people destroy good people... the shit apple doesn’t fall far from the shit tree!
Jordan’s thoughts are crystallised with the brilliance of a diamond ...illuminated by starlight
This excerpt describes the journey that leads to the underworld like a perfectly illustrated map.
betrayal is parasitic - it's someone latching onto you, using you up and then destroying you when you're no longer useful
Super amazing speech. There's not other psychologist like Dr Jordan Peterson he always nails at things!!! Wow!!!.🙏👍
Thanks for putting in words how I felt. I love your eloquence!
All is true to its nature. And I love it there
Betrayal shock will kill your faith in yourself. Not less than a death sentence.
Unfortunately and beautifully so... I’ve lived these words🤙
Thank you sir for helping our youth wake up and fight against evil to save their souls and the light of God in Christ that our father in Heaven formed in us when he created us and gave us life ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤
My life in 7 minutes, I don't even feel anger or indignation anymore...just resignation.
Thank you for sharing this!
Love JP
But couldn't help notice he slid his wedding ring up and down his finger then twisted right as he mentioned snakes.... my heart goes out to you brother
are you insinuating this is something he could have experienced?
My girlfriend of 6 years told me out of nowhere she doesnt know if she wants to be with me anymore and wants to leave me. She has said multiple times there is no one else. But the betrayal still feels like this
Hang in there man. You don't want to be with someone who isn't ALL IN. What difference is there if it's due to someone else or just apathy.
You deserve someone who wants you?
Deirdre Morris Honestly? I wouldn’t waste another minute of your life by hoping things might change. Even if they did, it wouldn’t be for long... Please don’t put yourself through any more heartache, and let her go... Oh it’s going to hurt like hell; but this would be the best thing you could do for YOU.
You deserve to have someone who loves you...who you can trust 100%
I hope all goes well for you.
God bless you!
Hell yeah it hurts but that wasn't the only pain when you lose your best friend your girlfriend and your son and your job that's paying my friend that I hope none of you have through this house I'm sitting in used to be alive and now it's fucking dead. Everybody's your friend you have something to offer but you have very few friends and everything is gone but here's the thing going through all that pain hurt for years makes you strong strong inside and you may see tears you may hear storiesbut they come back stronger than the letdown. Don't ever laugh at anybody that has a big heart because they've been through more pain than you'll ever have in your life the end
I'm thinking humans are cursed with knowledge and ignorance. Constantly attacked by uninitiated experience. Without any malevelance at all,You make monumental choices and decisions void of the full realisation or understanding of their impact on you and others.
We must admit our betrayal. To self and to others especially when it affects other's daily lives or will when they find out.
Another good one.
This is so true. I have no idea where I am now.
Betrayal is the worst thing in my life. I dated a girl in high school and it was great. We both got accepted into the same dream college for our majors. We went, she developed bipolar 1 out of state. She cheated, partied, screamed at me constantly, hated me. Very manipulative. No moral or ethical range. Out of nowhere. I dealt with it because I was in a new state no friends and just knew one person. Turns out I never made long lasting friendships and that relationship ended badly 4 years later. It sucks going to bed knowing nobody would know If you somehow died or had an accident. I was in this state alone. Lost everything but my college education. I’m a senior now. I moved back home. A friend betrayed me recently just this past month and called me nasty things. My friend group associated with him are leaving my life slowly. He’s a drug addict for coke, oxy, weed, shrooms etc. My friends know all that but still things are weird.
I’m on month 2 completely alone I haven’t seen anyone. I’m trying to rebuild myself I guess I don’t know. I’m lost. I’m only 22 and have been through this “underworld” many many times.
Another being my random type 1 diabetes diagnoses. Life long horrible disease.
At only 21 myself I may not be able to offer the wisest advice. I would say you’re only 22, life is full of endless possibilities especially when we are young. Think of the vast changes from 0-22 and imagine the changes from 22-40 you have the power to build positivity around yourself and achieve any goals you set! Just keep going forward you can’t change the past you just have to try and learn from it 👌
When you don't know what to do , "pray". And when you think you are alone or have no support. You are wrong. God is rooting for you. More power to you.
Peterson does a wonderful job explaining the psychological manifestation of the quantum mechanical system we exist in.
Peterson is damned well correct!! I know, I know that betrayal is worse than death!! I would have rather had my brother kill me than what he did to me!!!! on the other side of it, what he did made me look good at myself. and today I am a better person. but it still hurts and will for the rest of my life!!
Absolutely brilliant
My first betrayal - from birth and on, when my parents created the most toxic household for us, with constant arguing, fighting and bickering. I mean - at all times they were together. The second betrayal was, at 6 years old my parents left me with grandma for more than two years, I was devastated... the next one when my father got to jail for some shoplifting, and after some hardship, my mom brought me and my two young siblings to the orphanage, where I spent 5 .5 years. After I graduated school in orphanage, and reunited with my parents at age of 18, not knowing where else to go, the toxicity of fights and unhealthy relationship between my mom and dad continued , ignoring hard it did to us. So I finally left home and moved to another city. By then, I was immune to betrayals, trust me, if it possible at all. It became something so to say normal, a part of my life. I used to it. I would hurt again and again, and just suck it up. People don't treat me right, I used to it. If they do, I would sabotage our relationship, mostly subconsciously. I believe deeply in my soul that I do not deserve any better because my parents thought so. (((
That must have been hell to go thru. Every child deserves loving, caring parents. You are still young and can rebuild your life. With time you will learn how healthy relationships work and how to pick loyal friends. There are lots of free resources out there to teach yourself what your parents failed to show you with actions. It's up to you to break the generational curse. I wish you peace and love.
Love these videos
Beautifully said💖
Thank you !!!
Bro preach
thank you
The speech is just so briliantly eye opening. But i just have one comment: the underworld he talks about can not be the hell. Because, at least mythologically, hell is the representation of the space where you are supposed to get as a consequence of *your own* acts. Or betrayal is the action of someone else that pushes you in no second in this space of chaos, in this underworld as he calls it. But thats not the hell. It can not be. Whats your fault/mistake here? That you trusted? So trust is a mistake that would potentially lead you to hell? Well we can also look at things this way but then it comes at clash with what he says at the beginning. Then how to get organized and get along with each other if trust doesnt emerge from us as "cimpanzees full of snakes"? If trusting is THE mistake we do in this equation then we are all doomed to hell no matter what because trust is implicitly needed, the prerequisite for basic interactions with each other as he wonderfully explains.
So what pushes you into the chaos? Trusting or being betrayed? I guess its a matter of where you want to place the guilt. If on you (having trusted, being this naive thing - but then how else?) or on others (who betrayed you without you having done anything wrong). But thats a harsh conflict that emerges in you as a human being.
I prayed to have things revealed to me and I had a dream about actual snakes a few days before l learned of a betrayal.
Useful life lessons
This applies to everyone. Can one trust him/herself? A Course in Miracles will say your ego is the one who betrays your self.
That is very true Professor. If a person is wise and you know how the manner of trust you can give to a person you are negotiating and dealing with is good , so there is always a secure half of yourself that always reserved.No matter may happen there is always savings of assurance about your security like affidavit a proof of strongly have power or sworn if ever any tragic may happen you will never lose , you might get fool but there is power or proof advocate to save what can get to you....God bless Professor Jordan Peterson and more power...
“You predicated your perception of the word on the axiom of trust”
What do you use as an axiom to predicate your perception of the world one then?
Nothing is fake once in the underworld
Thanks man
I love his sense of humor...
Only place I’d rather be. In is. Whatever world it is. In my dreams
Axiom of Ttust
i) most powerful economic currency
ii) all professional and personal relationships are predicated on trust
iii) Mistrust breeds chaos but is ameliorated by calm observation with a bird’s eye view.
Your wife is a very lucky woman to have you in her life! And you did chose her so she must be really something then, too! ❤❤
The problem with me is that I don’t trust anyone , but at the same time I like things to unfold before me , I don’t like controlling my partner even if I believe the betrayal is going to take place , I instead of preventing it sooner I let in happen that way I know really who the person is and their capacity for evil .
There's another name for the underworld it's called hell .
Anyone who lives banking on certainty is simply a fool.
Wow
But that life also sucks. If you can't trust, life isn't lived fully, in my opinion anyway.
Easy. There is no betrayal if there is no trust therefore trusting isn’t a way to go.
E baš si bikonja! 😁
Bernard Bijelic Pa je.e me 2G , genetika i geografija. Ja bih radije da sam flamingo al jbg :)
collapsed back into the potential of which it emerged..
Trust is a mutual reciprocal contract, until it is broken. Trust is conditional, in that it only applies until it is broken by one party.
My partner left me after our 8-year relationship and 5-year IVF journey coming to an end. Then, I found out that he is already with our neighbor less than a month of break up. When I look back, I realise that it started several months before our breakup. At that time, I was still undergoing IVF treatment and going through a lot of suffering. Meanwhile, he had already made plan B & C for alternative options while I was desperately hoping for a successful transfer. I was too naive, there were some signs but I thought I were too sensitive. I feel completely lost and confused. I don't know what went wrong and when. He was kind and nice to me until the very last moment. Was he just pretending to be good? I don't know which one is the real him.
The Four Agreements
Tuesday March 9th 2021
11:53 a. m.
11th hour
Not light. Thinking it’s good because it sits I. My light
I was betrayed by my therapist and found myself torn apart. I think the reason betrayal was so painful was the division inside: I had to take time off work, pay money, believe and take risks and want to grow in order to relate better to people. When he sexually abused me for his lust, then betrayed the romantic attachment, then lied about it, he took what was healthy in me and destroyed it and left fear, bitterness, rage and hurt in it's place - along with the feeling that I could not trust anyone because who do you go to when your parents abused you, your country ignores the abuse, school avoids the abuse and then the person you go to for healing betrays you as well?
Be strong. Get up and keep your shoulders straight. And walk with your life. Get way from negative and toxic people. You will find nice people. Just never trust to no one 100%.
Did your parents abuse you?Thats horrible!!!
This got me back from the bottom of Hell.....
Where can I watch this complete video ? In which biblical series ?
Agreed with him
Great speech! It is sad, but betrayal exists even in our society. The examples could be the cases when some authorities or election campaigns do not do what they promised to do. Actually, we can the examples in our childhood from the family institution when our parents do not answer your question, pay attention, help. In this case, children often try to forgive them, thinking that they can one day look at them differently or some children begin to behave themselves accordingly (hurt others). if it comes to social institutions I really do not know what problems they have, but they by promising the great future and then falling them down they make it hard for people to believe. If all of this is not betrayal then what do we call it?
P.s in my opinion, everyone should respect someone else`s feeling, and before you promise something (think twice, or better 10 times), make sure that you are able to do it.
The moment 3:30
What exactly does he mean by underworld here? Can someone explain?
Let’s take a lil trip to the underworld
Let the the adventure begin
Link Full lecture ??? Anybody ?!?!?!?!?
Good Lord...early Peterson is some hair raising zssszaszzz! Betrayal can only come from those we revere, love, like or respect/trust. When it goes...man...thats a straight up tectonic shift.
4:09
Hi fellow students of great mind.
I don’t quite get what he said at the end of video 6:55. Could anyone give an explanation please?
He is saying that, of course, everyone wants to be in the walled Garden of Eden. In the walled garden, you are safer and can relax and build for the future. However, the dragon of chaos is always outside the garden wall -- and the snake in the garden is the reminder that even the safest of places harbors the possibility of chaos and also reminds that the dragon is waiting outside. In other lectures he talks more about what chaos and the dragon mean although he touches on it here: out of chaos comes new beginnings (the dragon must be slayed to get to the treasure.) If this is interesting to you, his lecture series on Genesis are very good.
@@lincheyes817 thank you. I remember the reference now.