I had a heart attack a couple of years ago and while they were talking to me suddenly everything changed. Someone was pounding the ever living hell out of my chest and I realized someone was performing CPR in me. I remembered from my red cross classes a warning to never ever perform CPR on someone who was awake, So I asked, "Should you be doing that when I'm awake?" I found out later when I asked that, the doctor was taking a breath to order a stop to CPR and note my time of death. Well, I always have been a procrastinator.
I was having a colonoscopy and the doctor who was starting the procedure was complaining that she couldn't get the probe in. Be fore the Anesthesia took hold, I turned and said: "I told you I was a virgin." The last thing I remember was the nurses laughing.
In 2013 I was diagnosed with a very large brain tumor. My family are a bunch of carpenters so when I was being wheeled into the OR I told my neurosurgeons to 'measure twice, cut once'. They got a little laugh out of that. The surgery went fine FYI.
I had my gall bladder removed at a VA hospital back around 2008 and the table they placed me on was shaped like a cross. They placed me on it and started the anesthesia and then started to strap me down to the table to prevent me from moving, as I began to go under, and they were strapping me down I said, "forgive them father for they know not what they do." Turns out all of the nurses were Catholic and burst out laughing because they immediately understood my joke. Them laughing out loud was the last thing I remember before waking up in post op.
Not when I was going under, but after the surgery was done: I had a ganglion cyst removed, and as the surgeon was stitching it up, I woke up a bit. This was right before Christmas, and I heard the surgeon ask the nurse if she was ready. Her response was a groan, so I said, "Well, you sound excited!" and promptly passed out again.
My first colonscopy. The doctor told me what was going on. The meds were kicking in. I said: "Doc. I normally require dinner and a movie before Iet people take pics back there."
I have a friend, a nurse-anesthetist who told me they use the same level of anesthesia for a colonoscopy as for cataracts. He referred to it as _poopers and peepers_ .
I was having surgery on my hand. As is typical, I wasn't allowed to eat 12 hours before, and the surgery was in the late morning and I was hungry. They gave me the anesthesia and after being out for a little while, I started to become aware of the conversation the surgeon was having with his staff: they were discussing what they wanted to get for lunch. Without missing a beat, I said "I'd like a reuben sandwich" from behind the screen they had between me and the work. They started panicking "oh my god, he's awake" and the next thing I knew I was out. When the surgeon visited me afterward, the first thing I said to him was "where's my reuben?"
Getting mine out, I started telling the oral surgeon's assistant, who also happened to be his daughter, how attractive she was (which was true). I came through the surgery ok, so I must not have said anything too out of line.
I did something similar. I had never been put under before and expected it to happen right away, so when they first jabbed me, I just looked up and said “Hey, I’m still conscious!” Less than ten seconds later I passed out.
When my shot got in, my parents were all like, "Don't look at it! Don't look at it!" And I just looked down, saw the needle and tube in my arm, and yelled, "Too late! I looked at it!" all disturbed XD Last thing I remember before falling asleep
I was in the military getting a really bad shoulder dislocation reset. They knocked me out (not anesthesia I think, but a different medicine that effectively did it to get around the no anesthesia rule for trainees). Coming to, the first thing I actually remember were saying the words “yes sir”. Then my vision and every other sense came back, I opened my eyes and realised it was a woman. I apologized and said “sorry. Ma’am.” All of them laughed a little too hard at the fact that the first thing I did was be professional when I had every opportunity and excuse to be funny or rude or anything under the sun of drugged up lol. The fact that I don’t even know what I was replying to makes me chuckle sometimes. My default setting is polite and professional, and that is certainly good to know lol
When I was having my first sinus surgery, the operating table had these boards for my arms. I dunno what they gave me to “relax” me before the propofol but as they were strapping me down, I loudly exclaimed, “Ooh, kinky!” The entire OR cracked up, and my anaesthesiologist was laughing so hard he was crying. He said, “You’re so lucky you won’t remember this!” Nope. I do. 😂
I was about 6 or so, had many surgeries when I was young so it wasn't my first rodeo. I felt myself going and just looked up at the nurses and dramatically said "GOODBYE!" then passed out. Apparently they were shocked and horrified. I thought it was hilarious.
Twelve years old and having emergency appendectomy. Anesthesiologist gave me a shot of something in my hospital room prior to being taken to the operating theatre. I did feel dopey. But when the orderlies came into the room to take me to surgery, they spent a moment to figure out the easiest way to move me to the gurney, I piped up and suggested they just get the gurney up close to my bed. I told them I thought I could crab across on my own. They agreed. I did it. Down to the surgery and then to the operating table. Again with the crabbing. I was getting dopier and sleepier. On the table, I asked the gentleman beside the bed if the overhead light was ultraviolet. He said it was. I said, "It's supposed to kill germs, right". He affirmed that. Then I said, "Am I making sense?" He answered, "Yes. I need to do something about that". Obviously I woke up later.
Colonoscopy drugs hit hard, I had to spend an extra hour in recovery and even then I was pie eyed. As the nurse guided me into the waiting room, she asked if I was all right. I burst out in full volume outdoor voice, "Are you kidding? I haven't felt this good in YEARS!"
I didn't wake up until after I was out of the theatre for my brain surgery (they must have knocked me out hard). Some guy was next to me saying he was here because he lit himself on fire because of his drug addiction and I just said "awww, that's nice". lol
@@Granolora No, but there isn't always a choice when it comes to brain surgery. Surgeons need to know if they are touching a healthy part of the brain, so they don't cause permanent brain damage.
Counter: What's the funniest thing an anesthesist can say to a patient 5 seconds before the're under? Anesthesist was from Russia, but worked in Germany since years. But one of his quirks was to introduce himself to the patients with (imagine thick accent) "Hello I am Dimitri. And you will sleep soon."
I found out I was sensitive to anesthetics when I woke up from an operation uncontrollably scream-laughing for approximately 30 minutes before they relented and administered morphine. I was then given orange juice in a sippy cup which I managed to get around 60% of it in my mouth. I got wheeled back into my mom's car with a bag of goldfish that no surprise, got all over her car floor. I came home where I passed out. An entire day later, I woke up with my entire family worried sick. The last memory I recalled was the start of counting down and have no memory of all of my actions. It's a shame recording isn't allowed in recovery rooms because I would've loved to have that on video. All I have is a video that my mom recorded on the car ride home where everything was beautiful to me.
Yeah, that’s all bs. You don’t go under full anesthesia and go home with your mommy like you were at the dentist. God, make your fiction better by looking up at least ONE fact
@@debbylou5729 No, you still go home. It just depends on how much anesthesia is administered, and your reaction to it. For me, I was still awake during the whole thing, but drowsy, and could feel my body falling asleep. Thus, I was allowed to go home with my parents, but my parents were informed to be extra careful of my drowsy state, and to perhaps let me sleep it off.
I had to have ovarian tumors removed and I remembered having a conversation in the recovery room with my cousin who'd been dead for two years. The funny thing was when the nurse went out to talk to my mom and my aunt (the mother of the deceased cousin.) She told them I was fine but still out of it having a conversation with someone who wasn't there.
I was getting a potentially tumorous growth removed. I was also in an a capella choir and had a concert that weekend. I told my doctors all about it and tried to sing for them, which naturally went terribly, then apologetically explained that I couldn't sing well while I was lying down. I probably would've kept babbling at them but they gently interrupted me and told me to just count backwards, at which point I fell asleep. I apologized when I woke up but they just laughed. Later, during my wisdom tooth removal, I also got super chatty on laughing gas - couldn't help but try to ask my dentist questions about the wisdom tooth removal mid-operation. It seemed so fascinating at the time.... Poor guy.
A short, but hopefully amusing story about my operation, I had been wheeled into the operating room, trying to keep myself calm , made this remark , just before being put under , I asked the surgeon " will I be able to play the piano after this ? " The surgeon replied " yes , you will be able to play the piano afterwards. " " great, " I said , " I've never played the piano before!" Heard snickering just before passing out . Old jokes still work in the OR apparently. 🙂
In 2020 I had to go under twice for a serious surgery (the docs told me later if I had waited one more day to come in I could have lost my leg or even died...I was terrified since I had never had major surgery before so thanks doc for not telling me that before the surgeries! Lol). The anesthesiologist was so nice when he was putting me under, both times, but I didn't have a chance either time to say something witty, the mask went on and I was out! I remember asking the nurse the second time when I woke up "Not fair, he never told me to count backwards...OOH can I have some Sprite?" She laughed and called me sweetheart and got me my drink, it was great.
I went in for stomach surgery and was given quite a bit of Propifol. As it was being pushed into my IV I couldn't help but let out an enthusiastic "Hee-hee!". I went out to the sound of giggling nurses and doctors.
I had to have surgery for an ovarian cyst rupture. Anesthesiologist came to check on me after and said, you look good. I responded with you look good too. I'm still embarrassed haha.
After my emergency c-section my doctor looked at me and said, "ok, you're all put back together now. Groggy from the extra anesthesia I asked him, "who am I, Humpty Dumpty?"
my husband went for a colonoscopy, he was given Valium before he was taken back. When he was returned to the room, he looked at me and said, "I really like that Viagra they gave me". I laughed so hard, the nurses came in to check on us. After I told her what he had said, the nurse went back to the desk, told the other nurses, and you could hear laughter all over the hospital. Glad he gave them a great laugh, they probably needed it.
I had a really long phase of drifting in and out of consciousness and the first time I woke up, I had the desperate urge to tell the anesthesiologist something crucial. When I woke up the second time, I had completely forgotten what that was. I will probably never remember, what was so important for me to tell them.
I didn't have my tonsils removed until age 21. The last thing I remember before being knockedout was the doctor telling me I'd be asleep in about 30 seconds and I think I said something like "That's awesome." Afterward I remember taking an offered popsicle and then telling my Mom to shut up because she was laughing at my failed attempts to get the popsicle anywhere near my mouth. And then I flipped off my Dad because he was eating cheetos and I knew I couldn't have any for at least 2 weeks. And then I threw up blood and was suddenly completely awake after taking hours to fully come around.
During my first endoscopy as a kid I remember vividly being so determined to beat the anesthesia and being so disappointed when I woke up. My mom told me afterwards that they had to shut my eyes for me because I went under with my eyes wide open, so in a way I did win!
Had a surgery actually a month ago, they had the mask on and I was two breaths in when I said to the anesthesiologist, "oh that's WEIRD", he paused pulled the mask off and went, ". . . what?" (probably thinking I might be having an adverse reaction), I then proceeded, in a half passed out voice go "i'm having double vision cause as my visual cortex is shutting down it can't keep my vision separate anymore" (something along those lines, might not be exact wording) and he goes "oh ok" puts the mask back on and says "deep breath" and I don't remember anything after that, I'm really tall but lean (6'4" only about 155 lbs), with a wicked fast metabolism, so I think he was really surprised I was not only still awake after 2 full breaths, but coherent enough to not only NOTICE the double vision, but explain the likely cause
"Hold uhhh... aunt choo gonna take ow my Wisseau teeth?" I believe my mom was laughing while the dentist calmly explained that they already removed my wisdom teeth.
Okay, when I was going under for my cardiac stents, the surgeon had classic rock playing..."Don't Fear the Reaper" by Blue Oyster Cult is NOT the last thing you want to hear! Also, while under for my first pacemaker insert, I came to, and heard my surgeon saying, "he's coming around, we may need more anesthesia", so I said, "I agree, a lot more please"...laughter, then, lights out again
My favorite one was the doctor knowing exactly when I would pass out when I went into surgery for my broken nose. He leaned over me and said: "Hello, my name is XY and I'll perform the surgery. Goodnight." I answered: "Goodnight", and then I was out.
One of my stupid party tricks is being able to recite all 50 states extremely fast. Just before they started my general anesthesia I said "I bet I can name all 50 states before I fall asleep" the anesthesiologist said okay go and push the plunger. I began my rapid list as I reached the end I heard him say "wow, he made it" Blackness
I had to have a perianal abscess dealt with under anaesthesia several years ago. (It's an all-to-common side issue for people with Crohn's Disease). As I was being prepped, the anaesthesiologist came bouncing into the room and said" "I hear someone's got a pain in the a**." I was to stressed at the time, but I wished later that I'd said something back about being tired of being the butt of people's jokes.
Back when I was 17, my I needed surgery on my eyes for the third time. As they where putting me under, I looked at the surgeon and said “I love you”. A little back story, he was the same surgeon who did my previous two surgeries in my eyes when I was 3 & 4 years old respectively.
My husband had a cardiac arrest in the gym and was rushed to hospital. While in intensive care he was kept heavily sedated and was then transferred to recovery ward. The first time I saw him he was still very confused. He looked up at the ceiling and remarked "this is a very shoddy hotel." I asked him where he thought he was and he looked around and said "Hong Kong?" He made a full recovery and has rejoined the same gym.
My Dad's hobby was keeping tropical fish, especially the bright dwarf cichlids. He was staring intently at a fluorescent light panel in the ceiling, then remarked, "Look at that one color up!"
my gf reportedly spent her entire wisdom tooth surgery prep - including after the IV went in and she was going down (it was full knock-out not laughing gas) - infodumping the team about meth. apparently she was really nervous and they gave her fentanyl to calm down. her response to this was to immediately go on a long ramble about how meth dealers cut meth with fentanyl or deal fentanyl instead of meth, which ends up killing people bc you're not supposed to take meth/fentanyl at the same time. she only stopped when she was unconscious.
I was having dental surgery and kept telling the surgeon that the anesthetic wasn't going to work. I made it to 9 (counting back from 10) before I was out. She said that, when I woke back up, I kept counting and said "see, didn't work".
I was in the hospital to part of my lung removed due to Cancer. The last thing I said as I went under was. "Good night everybody. " And hearing. "Good night Doctor Nick." And laughter... good times
I got pregnant while my husband and me were in Namibia, so we used to joke about me giving birth a child with black skin, cause that would mean i cheated (he is german, not white but pink skin). It was just a stupid couple joke. When the nurse gave me my son after the cesarea i smiled at her, like we shared a joke, and i said: "Good that he is not black". She stared at me with open mouth and answered nothing. Im sure she thought i was a racist horrible person, but i was too tired and too weak beacuse of anesthesia to try and explain myself. Despite my shame, i think her reaction was appropriate.
I don't remember right before any of my surgeries. But I do remember after. After each surgery I've had I wake up screaming. And I mean screaming in terror like I'm being murdered or something. After two times I now warn the hospital staff ahead of time, LOL
I was given a pre-op shot (apparently to relax me prior to full anesthesia?) and my husband said I started complimenting the color of the walls (they were white) and then the nurse came into view, and I told her she was beautiful and that I loved her, The nurse just chuckled and said "yup, the meds kicked in"
I had a bicycle accident landing on and fracturing my femur. The new ER at the hospital had been one of my construction inspection jobs and rolling in on the gurney I remarked that I hadn't seen that canopy from that angle before. The next day I called my office (crashed on Memorial Day when the office was closed) and told them I had broken my hip. "Is it broken bad?" "Did you ever hear of one being broken good?" As the nurse came in to give me the pre-op shot, my phone rang, and I had to talk another technician through the calculations for engineering tests I had started running at the recovery room in a different hospital on Friday before the crash. Finally, after I had been transferred to a rehab facility for physical therapy I finally got the package of paperwork for short and long-term disability compensation. My orthopedic surgeon came is as I opened the box I learned why I had a box instead of an envelope for the papers: the tech who had me talk him through the tests had included a pair of training wheels. I couldn't stop cracking up for the entire visit.
When I woke up from anesthesia after wisdom teeth extraction, I went into full-body, wracking sobs. When the nurse and my mom finally calmed me down, I said I was devastated because my baby dragon, Shaye, wasn’t here. My mom said she had never seen me so sad in her entire life.
I had a vasectomy in 1976 and after being shaved and sterilized I began to itch from the prep. and started to reach down for relief. The Dr. said, "No, no,no you're sterile". I exclaimed "hell, you're good Doc. I felt nothing. I can't believe that you are done".
This past october I had to get a root canal done, and while I wasn't put under for it, after the specialist gave me the numbing shots for my mouth, he came back a few minutes later to ask me how I felt, and I responded "I feel like if you punched out my top incisors I would not feel you punching out my top incisors". He laughed and told me that was a good sign
Got my gallbladder taken out a few years ago. Before I conked out I said to the nurses, "Do me a favor, if I don't make it I want one of you to say, 'he's dead Jim.'" They responded with words of encouragement. I was dissappointed they weren't Star Trek fans.
Came out of anesthesia once loudly singing Home on the Range. Another time the nurses told me I became combative and claimed I was being abducted by space aliens. I had no memory of that.
My Dad was in late-stage dementia due to metastasized lung cancer, had come out of some sort of nerve block aimed to make him more comfortable, He roused and asked, "Where am I?" "The Black Cat Club in Tangiers" I replied, recalling that he had told a tall tale from his world war Two service, and that there was a brothel by that name. He chuckled. "Oh, Thank God. I'd hate to feel this bad if I wasn't having a good time."
I got my wisdom teeth pulled and when I woke up I was talking about the night terrors I had and the assistant goes "that explains the tensing and mild shaking, we thought we just hit a nerve or something" I proceeded to hit on her despite having a girlfriend WHOM I JUST FINISHED TALKING ABOUT. I also demanded my mom give me the keys cause I was driving us home. She told me not a chance and that im way too far gone to drive. This revelation made me quite upset. I also demanded my teeth back as they had come from my mouth therefore I owned them and i didnt want them being sold on the black market.... What did I learn that day? I do not handle drugs very well
When I got my last colonoscopy I told the doctor that last time I woke up early during the procedure.. He basically patted me on the head and said "no you didn't". Lo and behold, I woke up half way through again. I dont think he liked me much.
I was in surgery for a C-section. I could hear the doctors quite clearly. As the surgeon started the incision I said, I can feel that. I heard a panic scuffle and went out, like a light.
When I was about 9, I needed to get two “baby teeth” removed, because they were stuck to my “adult teeth”. I remembered them telling me that one of the “funny things” I said was “Maybe I’ll stay here for a few days, a couple months maybe.” Shortly after, I was put into a wheelchair, and fell walking into the house. That, *that* I remember.
The best one I did was before a colonoscopy I broke out with the Star Trek music and did the You are going where no man has gone before. I had the doctors and nurses on the floor laughing.
I was having a toe amputated, the joint cut out and the toe reattached. As the anesthetics started to work I apparently said "don't forget to reattach the toe on the left foot I don't want six (6) toes on my right.... right" I had been tempted to put an arrow pointing to the toe in question before surgery and write "it's this one" on it in the same way that they put "not this leg" in the movies and episodes of House.
Before arm surgery I asked if I'll be able to play the piano after this. One of the nurses said, "aww, of course you will!" I said, "Cool, cuz I couldn't before. " The whole room laughed. Sucess. Out.
I had the sentence "hey Doc, is it normal to smell the chemical you are putting in my arm?" I never heard his awnser but i actually managed to say that quite normally before i resurfaced in the waking up room trying to remove the IV not knowing how it got there
That is a thing. IV injections travel straight up your arm with the blood and goes to your lungs. If it's high enough concentration, you might taste or smell whatever it is.
Apparently, I suddenly spoke during a wisdom tooth extraction, both startling the dental surgeon & making blood spurt everywhere. All I remember is that I could suddenly see them & they were shouting. There was also quite a bit of blood. They were not amused. Edited to correct autocorrect's nonsensical correction.
I have 2 stories. As a teen after a minor procedure I woke up in bed at home, walked out to the living room and asked in confusion how we got home. Last year, after cataract surgery the first thing I remember is trying to coordinate a spoonful of applesauce into my mouth. The Dr. was explaining the complications that happened and it was so unsettling my mom fainted while all I was registering was how hungry I was.
My first cataract surgery The doctor forgot to deaden the optic nerve and I saw the surgery when I went in for the recheck a week later I said that was really unusual and the look on my doctor's face was complete shock The second surgery they didn't forget
Whenever I'm about to be put under, I thank the surgical team in advance for what they're about to do, then I steal a line from "The Hollow Man": "If I don't make it, pretend my last words were something witty and memorable."... Gets at least a chuckle every time.
I have a few stories the first was the most recent. I never went under anesthesia however I was talking about some seriously crazy things according to my wife. I acquired Legionnaires disease and it went on so long due to my former dr not seeing me in person but virtually because of a fever. They said I had the flu and prescribed meds for that hence the reason I waited for almost too long. I was having trouble walking, with balance dizziness, etc but when it got to the point I couldn't breathe my wife got me to the car and to the hospital. After all the tests were done, and I woke up later to my in-room phone ringing. It was my wife who said I was complaining that I don't want to talk I just want to sleep and play with my cool buckets. she said I said some other weird but funny things about the nurses being ninjas, I had been stabbed thousands of times and still can't be killed, and so on. Come to find out the disease messed with my blood sugar, made it to my brain and the high fevers were causing all sorts of delusions and hallucinations. The Dr later told us with as bad as it was he would not give me more than 24 hrs but would bet I would not have woken up to go to the hospital if my wife didn't make me go when she did which was 4 am I was shooting for 6 am. The next story was when my kid dislocated his knee and was on morphine to reset it well after it was set and they were getting his knee brace, crutches, and paperwork he looked at the nurse and asked what she gave him. She told him morphine and he said "Morphine tried to kill me, I am so gonna kick morphine's ass!" The last one was when I went in to have an impacted tooth removed and when I woke up they were having me stand up to move to the recovery room. Now the assistant that had to be no more than 5'1 and very petite had to help me. I looked at her and said, "Are you sure you can get me there, you are so tiny?" I said it like the old "she kicks so high" commercial. It certainly does not help we have a weird sense of humor. Of course, as a husband, I do annoy my wife and she makes comments like "I can kill you" when I leave a mess. Now I just reply "You had your chance but messed that up" or when she calls me an idiot when I say something silly. I then reply "Well you said yes when I asked you to marry me, and you followed through so what does that make you" Of course being our spawn our son has a twisted sense of humor as well.
The first time that I was knocked out by anesthesia was to get my wisdom teeth removed. I didn't actually say anything, but the last thing that I remember before getting knocked out was wondering what why it was taking so long for the anesthesia to knock me out. The next thing I remember, I was in a car driving home. Apparently, I woke up from the anesthesia and was fully conscious/functional before we left the building and even said several things that made sense/I seemed perfectly normal, but I don't remember anything I said or did during that time.
When I went to the dentist I proved to be resistant to pain killers. Resistant to the point the dentist jabbed me around 3-4 times, and almost went insane when he started the surgery just to hear me mumble "ow." He pinched my lip because my haws don't open that wide. So when I eventually got a medical surgery I told the anesthesiologist that I might be resistant. We had like a 30 second conversation before it came on suddenly.
If you're a married man, next time you go in for a colonoscopy, ask the doctor to write a note to your wife/husband saying that "no, your head is nowhere to be found up there"😁
First time my daughter got laughing gas at the dentist. She couldn’t stop talking to the poor dentist. Hey hey Dr I like you, hey dr. I’m sitting in the corner trying not to laugh. She finally calmed down after about five minutes
I will forever have extreme respect and gratitude to anesthesiologists. My first time going under as a kid i was having a hard time not having a panic attack. Someone promised me a popcicle afterwards but that didnt soothe my fears much. The anesthesiologists knew me and knew i loved spiders so they distracted me by asking me to teach them about spider anatomy as it was something i knew well. I remember someone holding my hand and feeling safe enough rather than piss terrified. Last things i said to them was “Im going to stop talking now since its getting hard. Thank you so much” i just remember waking up and asking if i could have my popcicle yet. I still remember the cherry flavor.
I was being put under for an MRI because I have muscle spasms when awake. the anesthesiologist said "Youre not going to remember me" I told her I would, and as they gave me the gas, it was taking a while since I am somewhat resistant to it, it seems. I suddenly felt pins and needles, then felt nothing. at all. and yet I was still awake while my body fell asleep. and I said "Whelp, here I go." And passed out immediately. needless to say, I remember all of it.
I got my wisdom teeth put back in high school. That was when I learned I have more resistance to anesthesia because I definitely woke up before they were finished. It felt like they were taking a hammer to my tooth for about 30 seconds, and I could see the shapes of the dental surgeons. I think they were shocked (needless to say) and quickly up my dosage because I went back under very quickly after I looked at them.
Same but with a broken arm. Im pretty sure that is why I was so scared of everything after that until age 12. (Knowing I have at least 2 surgeries coming in the future I hope my body didn’t get any more resistent to them)
I woke up from anesthesia to hear the doctor say, “We sure don’t want the state board to hear about this one.” At my check up with the doctor a week later, I inquired “if anything unusual happened during the procedure”. The doctor played dumb.
Wasn't from going under, but in recovery from getadrenal gland removed, a nurse told me to press the help button if I needed anything. I waited a few minutes and pressed it. Nurses voice : "Do you need something?" Me : "I just checked, and it looks like the penis enlargement surgery didn't work. In fact, I think it's even smaller." I smiled to myself as I heard the whole nurses station erupt in laughter.
When they wheeled me in after I broke my hip (bicycle crash in full spandex) I asked, "Is this where we're auditioning for _The Incredible Shrinking Man_ ?
When I had my appendix out in 2013, i remember them asking if I needed anything before I was out, and I asked “yeah, could you remove about 50 lbs while you’re in there?” There were a few chuckles and then I was gone
I remember talking to the guy walking my bed to the actual surgery room. We were talking about Scrubs TV show and how it is not a real doctor show. Somebody yell from down the hall we passed, "Yes it is!!!!"
The first time I went under (for an endoscopy) I didn't fall asleep right away. The lights were off, I had the thing in my mouth to keep it open, and we were waiting for me to fall asleep. After 10 seconds, I said, "Still awake guys." After 5 more seconds, "Still awake." I heard the anesthesiologist say, "Oh, it's kinked" and then I was waking up.
You can’t have a tummy tuck at the same time as a c-section. 1. You’re still swollen 2. A c-section is a “clean” surgery whereas a tummy tuck requires a “sterile” surgery. (I asked if my OB could repair my hernia during a c-section and this is how he explained it.) 3. You have other sutures in the way that need to heal before bringing in your muscles and removing loose skin.
I was given ketamine as an anesthetic when I broke my forearm. The thing with ketamine is that it doesn't really send you to sleep, the nurses just gaslight you into thinking you're asleep but I didn't fall for any of their bullshit so I still remember everything from the surgery. Anyways, when it was done one of them told me I would probably not remember out interaction so I made it my life's fucking mission to remember him. Every time he entered my room I told him I knew who he was and it got so annoying my mom had to restrain me from harrassing the poor guy.
At christmas I had kidney surgery, I was told to count down from 10. after 0 I went to -26, next I was in recovery. It takes a lot to knock me out and longer for me to wake up.
I was laughing because of the "take care of the little guy" and then went full surprised mode when i saw story 39 when u thought i saw 4 or 5 storys and i see "story 39" ...
About 15 years ago I had surgery on my mouth and jaw, I remember talking and laughing about the ducks on my feet ( I was wearing my house shoes) and then my husband had to go to work. 3 days was in between those 2 memories and I have no idea what happened.
When I was just about to go under anesthesia for a minor surgery, I heard a rather funny line from one of the docs. I did hear the subject of the conversation - they were talking about ink pens - but when taken out of context, what he said was hilarious to me. "We've lost three just this morning!" (Very cool to hear that from a doc just before going under. :P) Now, my mother had been subjected to anesthesia before and she told me she didn't remember anything from a while before, and a while after it. And I was concerned that I would forget that line upon waking up, and I thought it a shame, because I really wanted to tell my dad about it. Turns out, when I came to, I very much did remember it and was more than happy to tell him about it when I saw him. XD
When I had my wisdom teeth out, as soon as the anesthesia started hitting me, I told the dentist or whoever was there all about the fantasy world that I had invented, which was inspired by 'Fantasia' in the movie 'The Neverending Story.'
I went in to get my tonsils out at 25. I had recently watched Monty Python's The Meaning of Life. I was loopy as I was being wheeled into the operating room, I told the nurses and doctors to please not lose me in the room, like the birth scene in the movie. Apparently the last thing I asked was "where is the machine that goes bing?"
Guy I know was having inguinal hernia surgery, and had his knees up and spread and the the whole area swabbed down. Being the kind of personality that can pull it off, he warned the OR staff "If I wake up and I'm a a woman, there's going to be hell to pay." Apparently it went over pretty well.
I needed emergency stomach surgery and was going into the theater I apparently said "I don't want to go to this theater... Is there something better in that other one? I think I've seen this show already... it was awful and there was no popcorn"... I had had surgery in the same hospital a few years earlier (had also been stomach surgery... different surgeon) and the surgery had been in the same theater. At the time I had been on a morphine drip for the previous 3 days and was pretty loopy even before the pre-surgery meds
Having a myomectomy done, for some reason I gave my surgeon's team a full lecture on how to do a merge with Microsoft Word and Excel. I head the attending ask my surgeon what was I talking about and he told him not to worry, that's the kind of work I do. No idea why I did that, considering I loathe doing merges.
my story when I was little managed to get a BIG splinter under my thumb the nail needed to be removed. I was given night night juice kid safe, they had a kid movie playing in the room. I was scared out of my mind mom, nurse and doctor couldn't understand why are you still awake. apparently enough fear countered it or that's what I think so watched staying still whimpering. they finished bandaged my thumb and done.
I was going to do a fibula surgery. I was lying on the operating table, just waiting for them to set everything up. Then I blink for a second and ask “are you guys going to start yet?”. Then my mom replies “it’s already over”. I then realized I was back in my hospital room with my leg on a cast.
I woke up in the middle of surgery, when they put me back under, I said, "Why do they seafood restaurants at Sea World?, and if you're eating there, are you eating the slow learners?"
I had a heart attack a couple of years ago and while they were talking to me suddenly everything changed.
Someone was pounding the ever living hell out of my chest and I realized someone was performing CPR in me. I remembered from my red cross classes a warning to never ever perform CPR on someone who was awake, So I asked, "Should you be doing that when I'm awake?"
I found out later when I asked that, the doctor was taking a breath to order a stop to CPR and note my time of death.
Well, I always have been a procrastinator.
I was having a colonoscopy and the doctor who was starting the procedure was complaining that she couldn't get the probe in. Be fore the Anesthesia took hold, I turned and said: "I told you I was a virgin." The last thing I remember was the nurses laughing.
In 2013 I was diagnosed with a very large brain tumor. My family are a bunch of carpenters so when I was being wheeled into the OR I told my neurosurgeons to 'measure twice, cut once'. They got a little laugh out of that.
The surgery went fine FYI.
Only a little laugh?
That's hilarious and clever.
did you live?
I mean, that is pretty good advice. In both cases.
did you is not dead??
I had my gall bladder removed at a VA hospital back around 2008 and the table they placed me on was shaped like a cross. They placed me on it and started the anesthesia and then started to strap me down to the table to prevent me from moving, as I began to go under, and they were strapping me down I said, "forgive them father for they know not what they do." Turns out all of the nurses were Catholic and burst out laughing because they immediately understood my joke. Them laughing out loud was the last thing I remember before waking up in post op.
Not when I was going under, but after the surgery was done: I had a ganglion cyst removed, and as the surgeon was stitching it up, I woke up a bit. This was right before Christmas, and I heard the surgeon ask the nurse if she was ready. Her response was a groan, so I said, "Well, you sound excited!" and promptly passed out again.
My first colonscopy. The doctor told me what was going on. The meds were kicking in. I said: "Doc. I normally require dinner and a movie before Iet people take pics back there."
That’s fantastic!
I have a friend, a nurse-anesthetist who told me they use the same level of anesthesia for a colonoscopy as for cataracts.
He referred to it as _poopers and peepers_ .
🤣🤣🤣💯
I was having surgery on my hand. As is typical, I wasn't allowed to eat 12 hours before, and the surgery was in the late morning and I was hungry. They gave me the anesthesia and after being out for a little while, I started to become aware of the conversation the surgeon was having with his staff: they were discussing what they wanted to get for lunch. Without missing a beat, I said "I'd like a reuben sandwich" from behind the screen they had between me and the work. They started panicking "oh my god, he's awake" and the next thing I knew I was out.
When the surgeon visited me afterward, the first thing I said to him was "where's my reuben?"
You got your priorities straight 😂
@Sapphire Dark yes lol
So did you get the sandwich? 😂
@@letizialorusso1950 NO! Dammit, but I did get to eat.
I love it
I actually told my doc getting wisdom teeth out “Don’t start I’m still awake” They just replied “we aren’t gonna do it again”
Getting mine out, I started telling the oral surgeon's assistant, who also happened to be his daughter, how attractive she was (which was true). I came through the surgery ok, so I must not have said anything too out of line.
I did something similar. I had never been put under before and expected it to happen right away, so when they first jabbed me, I just looked up and said “Hey, I’m still conscious!” Less than ten seconds later I passed out.
@@Elanchana Took me a good 10 minutes to go out I reckon, could have been less I don't know. I just remember we were talking A LOT.
It’s crazy man. They put it in and one moment you’re talking, then the next it’s over and you’re barely conscious.
When my shot got in, my parents were all like, "Don't look at it! Don't look at it!" And I just looked down, saw the needle and tube in my arm, and yelled, "Too late! I looked at it!" all disturbed XD
Last thing I remember before falling asleep
I was in the military getting a really bad shoulder dislocation reset. They knocked me out (not anesthesia I think, but a different medicine that effectively did it to get around the no anesthesia rule for trainees). Coming to, the first thing I actually remember were saying the words “yes sir”. Then my vision and every other sense came back, I opened my eyes and realised it was a woman. I apologized and said “sorry. Ma’am.” All of them laughed a little too hard at the fact that the first thing I did was be professional when I had every opportunity and excuse to be funny or rude or anything under the sun of drugged up lol. The fact that I don’t even know what I was replying to makes me chuckle sometimes. My default setting is polite and professional, and that is certainly good to know lol
When I was having my first sinus surgery, the operating table had these boards for my arms. I dunno what they gave me to “relax” me before the propofol but as they were strapping me down, I loudly exclaimed, “Ooh, kinky!” The entire OR cracked up, and my anaesthesiologist was laughing so hard he was crying. He said, “You’re so lucky you won’t remember this!” Nope. I do. 😂
Lol
LOL
Lol
LOL
LOL
I was about 6 or so, had many surgeries when I was young so it wasn't my first rodeo. I felt myself going and just looked up at the nurses and dramatically said "GOODBYE!" then passed out. Apparently they were shocked and horrified. I thought it was hilarious.
Twelve years old and having emergency appendectomy. Anesthesiologist gave me a shot of something in my hospital room prior to being taken to the operating theatre. I did feel dopey. But when the orderlies came into the room to take me to surgery, they spent a moment to figure out the easiest way to move me to the gurney, I piped up and suggested they just get the gurney up close to my bed. I told them I thought I could crab across on my own. They agreed. I did it.
Down to the surgery and then to the operating table. Again with the crabbing. I was getting dopier and sleepier. On the table, I asked the gentleman beside the bed if the overhead light was ultraviolet. He said it was. I said, "It's supposed to kill germs, right". He affirmed that. Then I said, "Am I making sense?" He answered, "Yes. I need to do something about that".
Obviously I woke up later.
Colonoscopy drugs hit hard, I had to spend an extra hour in recovery and even then I was pie eyed. As the nurse guided me into the waiting room, she asked if I was all right. I burst out in full volume outdoor voice, "Are you kidding? I haven't felt this good in YEARS!"
I didn't wake up until after I was out of the theatre for my brain surgery (they must have knocked me out hard). Some guy was next to me saying he was here because he lit himself on fire because of his drug addiction and I just said "awww, that's nice". lol
I would pay to see the dude's face after that line!
You weren't awake during the brain surgery?
@@saphiriathebluedragonknight375 would you want to be awake while some dude pokes around inside your brain?
@@Granolora No, but there isn't always a choice when it comes to brain surgery. Surgeons need to know if they are touching a healthy part of the brain, so they don't cause permanent brain damage.
Counter: What's the funniest thing an anesthesist can say to a patient 5 seconds before the're under?
Anesthesist was from Russia, but worked in Germany since years. But one of his quirks was to introduce himself to the patients with (imagine thick accent) "Hello I am Dimitri. And you will sleep soon."
Ok open the wikiHow article
LOL
I found out I was sensitive to anesthetics when I woke up from an operation uncontrollably scream-laughing for approximately 30 minutes before they relented and administered morphine. I was then given orange juice in a sippy cup which I managed to get around 60% of it in my mouth. I got wheeled back into my mom's car with a bag of goldfish that no surprise, got all over her car floor. I came home where I passed out. An entire day later, I woke up with my entire family worried sick. The last memory I recalled was the start of counting down and have no memory of all of my actions. It's a shame recording isn't allowed in recovery rooms because I would've loved to have that on video. All I have is a video that my mom recorded on the car ride home where everything was beautiful to me.
Yeah, that’s all bs. You don’t go under full anesthesia and go home with your mommy like you were at the dentist. God, make your fiction better by looking up at least ONE fact
@@debbylou5729 uhm, what?
@@debbylou5729 it’s still a story even if it’s possible that it’s fake. I think it’s good, not bad
@@cqdiamondman1146 oh, it’s fake….so not particularly good fiction
@@debbylou5729 No, you still go home. It just depends on how much anesthesia is administered, and your reaction to it. For me, I was still awake during the whole thing, but drowsy, and could feel my body falling asleep. Thus, I was allowed to go home with my parents, but my parents were informed to be extra careful of my drowsy state, and to perhaps let me sleep it off.
I had to have ovarian tumors removed and I remembered having a conversation in the recovery room with my cousin who'd been dead for two years. The funny thing was when the nurse went out to talk to my mom and my aunt (the mother of the deceased cousin.) She told them I was fine but still out of it having a conversation with someone who wasn't there.
Your cousin was just checking in on you
@@Ramon_nN1alt I totally believe that he was always my favorite cousin and looked out for me.
@Timothy Robertson Thank you.
I was getting a potentially tumorous growth removed. I was also in an a capella choir and had a concert that weekend. I told my doctors all about it and tried to sing for them, which naturally went terribly, then apologetically explained that I couldn't sing well while I was lying down. I probably would've kept babbling at them but they gently interrupted me and told me to just count backwards, at which point I fell asleep. I apologized when I woke up but they just laughed. Later, during my wisdom tooth removal, I also got super chatty on laughing gas - couldn't help but try to ask my dentist questions about the wisdom tooth removal mid-operation. It seemed so fascinating at the time.... Poor guy.
I recently had a colonoscopy. Right as the anesthesia kicked in, I remember saying, "Wow! That's the good stuff!"
A short, but hopefully amusing story about my operation, I had been wheeled into the operating room, trying to keep myself calm , made this remark , just before being put under , I asked the surgeon " will I be able to play the piano after this ? " The surgeon replied " yes , you will be able to play the piano afterwards. "
" great, " I said , " I've never played the piano before!"
Heard snickering just before passing out .
Old jokes still work in the OR apparently. 🙂
In 2020 I had to go under twice for a serious surgery (the docs told me later if I had waited one more day to come in I could have lost my leg or even died...I was terrified since I had never had major surgery before so thanks doc for not telling me that before the surgeries! Lol). The anesthesiologist was so nice when he was putting me under, both times, but I didn't have a chance either time to say something witty, the mask went on and I was out! I remember asking the nurse the second time when I woke up "Not fair, he never told me to count backwards...OOH can I have some Sprite?" She laughed and called me sweetheart and got me my drink, it was great.
I went in for stomach surgery and was given quite a bit of Propifol. As it was being pushed into my IV I couldn't help but let out an enthusiastic "Hee-hee!". I went out to the sound of giggling nurses and doctors.
I had to have surgery for an ovarian cyst rupture. Anesthesiologist came to check on me after and said, you look good. I responded with you look good too. I'm still embarrassed haha.
After my emergency c-section my doctor looked at me and said, "ok, you're all put back together now. Groggy from the extra anesthesia I asked him, "who am I, Humpty Dumpty?"
Depends, were there horses?
my husband went for a colonoscopy, he was given Valium before he was taken back. When he was returned to the room, he looked at me and said, "I really like that Viagra they gave me". I laughed so hard, the nurses came in to check on us. After I told her what he had said, the nurse went back to the desk, told the other nurses, and you could hear laughter all over the hospital. Glad he gave them a great laugh, they probably needed it.
I had a really long phase of drifting in and out of consciousness and the first time I woke up, I had the desperate urge to tell the anesthesiologist something crucial. When I woke up the second time, I had completely forgotten what that was. I will probably never remember, what was so important for me to tell them.
I didn't have my tonsils removed until age 21. The last thing I remember before being knockedout was the doctor telling me I'd be asleep in about 30 seconds and I think I said something like "That's awesome."
Afterward I remember taking an offered popsicle and then telling my Mom to shut up because she was laughing at my failed attempts to get the popsicle anywhere near my mouth. And then I flipped off my Dad because he was eating cheetos and I knew I couldn't have any for at least 2 weeks. And then I threw up blood and was suddenly completely awake after taking hours to fully come around.
During my first endoscopy as a kid I remember vividly being so determined to beat the anesthesia and being so disappointed when I woke up.
My mom told me afterwards that they had to shut my eyes for me because I went under with my eyes wide open, so in a way I did win!
Had a surgery actually a month ago, they had the mask on and I was two breaths in when I said to the anesthesiologist, "oh that's WEIRD", he paused pulled the mask off and went, ". . . what?" (probably thinking I might be having an adverse reaction), I then proceeded, in a half passed out voice go "i'm having double vision cause as my visual cortex is shutting down it can't keep my vision separate anymore" (something along those lines, might not be exact wording) and he goes "oh ok" puts the mask back on and says "deep breath" and I don't remember anything after that, I'm really tall but lean (6'4" only about 155 lbs), with a wicked fast metabolism, so I think he was really surprised I was not only still awake after 2 full breaths, but coherent enough to not only NOTICE the double vision, but explain the likely cause
Beeg brain moment
"Hold uhhh... aunt choo gonna take ow my Wisseau teeth?"
I believe my mom was laughing while the dentist calmly explained that they already removed my wisdom teeth.
Okay, when I was going under for my cardiac stents, the surgeon had classic rock playing..."Don't Fear the Reaper" by Blue Oyster Cult is NOT the last thing you want to hear! Also, while under for my first pacemaker insert, I came to, and heard my surgeon saying, "he's coming around, we may need more anesthesia", so I said, "I agree, a lot more please"...laughter, then, lights out again
My favorite one was the doctor knowing exactly when I would pass out when I went into surgery for my broken nose. He leaned over me and said: "Hello, my name is XY and I'll perform the surgery. Goodnight." I answered: "Goodnight", and then I was out.
One of my stupid party tricks is being able to recite all 50 states extremely fast.
Just before they started my general anesthesia I said "I bet I can name all 50 states before I fall asleep" the anesthesiologist said okay go and push the plunger.
I began my rapid list as I reached the end I heard him say "wow, he made it"
Blackness
I had to have a perianal abscess dealt with under anaesthesia several years ago. (It's an all-to-common side issue for people with Crohn's Disease). As I was being prepped, the anaesthesiologist came bouncing into the room and said" "I hear someone's got a pain in the a**." I was to stressed at the time, but I wished later that I'd said something back about being tired of being the butt of people's jokes.
Back when I was 17, my I needed surgery on my eyes for the third time. As they where putting me under, I looked at the surgeon and said “I love you”. A little back story, he was the same surgeon who did my previous two surgeries in my eyes when I was 3 & 4 years old respectively.
My husband had a cardiac arrest in the gym and was rushed to hospital. While in intensive care he was kept heavily sedated and was then transferred to recovery ward. The first time I saw him he was still very confused. He looked up at the ceiling and remarked "this is a very shoddy hotel." I asked him where he thought he was and he looked around and said "Hong Kong?"
He made a full recovery and has rejoined the same gym.
My Dad's hobby was keeping tropical fish, especially the bright dwarf cichlids. He was staring intently at a fluorescent light panel in the ceiling, then remarked, "Look at that one color up!"
my gf reportedly spent her entire wisdom tooth surgery prep - including after the IV went in and she was going down (it was full knock-out not laughing gas) - infodumping the team about meth.
apparently she was really nervous and they gave her fentanyl to calm down. her response to this was to immediately go on a long ramble about how meth dealers cut meth with fentanyl or deal fentanyl instead of meth, which ends up killing people bc you're not supposed to take meth/fentanyl at the same time. she only stopped when she was unconscious.
I was having dental surgery and kept telling the surgeon that the anesthetic wasn't going to work. I made it to 9 (counting back from 10) before I was out. She said that, when I woke back up, I kept counting and said "see, didn't work".
Omg that's hilarious!!!
I was in the hospital to part of my lung removed due to Cancer.
The last thing I said as I went under was. "Good night everybody. "
And hearing.
"Good night Doctor Nick."
And laughter... good times
I got pregnant while my husband and me were in Namibia, so we used to joke about me giving birth a child with black skin, cause that would mean i cheated (he is german, not white but pink skin). It was just a stupid couple joke. When the nurse gave me my son after the cesarea i smiled at her, like we shared a joke, and i said: "Good that he is not black". She stared at me with open mouth and answered nothing. Im sure she thought i was a racist horrible person, but i was too tired and too weak beacuse of anesthesia to try and explain myself.
Despite my shame, i think her reaction was appropriate.
In the context she knows, makes sense for her to react like that, but I get your joke lol
I hope somebody at least found her after.
I don't remember right before any of my surgeries. But I do remember after. After each surgery I've had I wake up screaming. And I mean screaming in terror like I'm being murdered or something. After two times I now warn the hospital staff ahead of time, LOL
I was given a pre-op shot (apparently to relax me prior to full anesthesia?) and my husband said I started complimenting the color of the walls (they were white) and then the nurse came into view, and I told her she was beautiful and that I loved her, The nurse just chuckled and said "yup, the meds kicked in"
If I ever have to have a surgery, I can guarantee that I will say "haha, I'm in danger."
Im gonna definitely say that when I get my trans surgeries
I had a bicycle accident landing on and fracturing my femur.
The new ER at the hospital had been one of my construction inspection jobs and rolling in on the gurney I remarked that I hadn't seen that canopy from that angle before.
The next day I called my office (crashed on Memorial Day when the office was closed) and told them I had broken my hip.
"Is it broken bad?"
"Did you ever hear of one being broken good?"
As the nurse came in to give me the pre-op shot, my phone rang, and I had to talk another technician through the calculations for engineering tests I had started running at the recovery room in a different hospital on Friday before the crash.
Finally, after I had been transferred to a rehab facility for physical therapy I finally got the package of paperwork for short and long-term disability compensation. My orthopedic surgeon came is as I opened the box
I learned why I had a box instead of an envelope for the papers: the tech who had me talk him through the tests had included a pair of training wheels. I couldn't stop cracking up for the entire visit.
When I woke up from anesthesia after wisdom teeth extraction, I went into full-body, wracking sobs. When the nurse and my mom finally calmed me down, I said I was devastated because my baby dragon, Shaye, wasn’t here.
My mom said she had never seen me so sad in her entire life.
I had a vasectomy in 1976 and after being shaved and sterilized I began to itch from the prep. and started to reach down for relief. The Dr. said, "No, no,no you're sterile". I exclaimed "hell, you're good Doc. I felt nothing. I can't believe that you are done".
This past october I had to get a root canal done, and while I wasn't put under for it, after the specialist gave me the numbing shots for my mouth, he came back a few minutes later to ask me how I felt, and I responded "I feel like if you punched out my top incisors I would not feel you punching out my top incisors". He laughed and told me that was a good sign
Got my gallbladder taken out a few years ago. Before I conked out I said to the nurses, "Do me a favor, if I don't make it I want one of you to say, 'he's dead Jim.'" They responded with words of encouragement. I was dissappointed they weren't Star Trek fans.
As someone with multiple personalities, Im saving "we are all counting on you" for later
when they got me, & they came in asking me "if i was feeling anything yet," i looked at her cross eyed & i was like "duuuuude" .. LMFAO 😆
Came out of anesthesia once loudly singing Home on the Range. Another time the nurses told me I became combative and claimed I was being abducted by space aliens. I had no memory of that.
The anesthesiologist said "Dream of something nice..."
I instantly replied "You'll do!"
What! He was gorgeous.
My Dad was in late-stage dementia due to metastasized lung cancer, had come out of some sort of nerve block aimed to make him more comfortable,
He roused and asked, "Where am I?"
"The Black Cat Club in Tangiers" I replied, recalling that he had told a tall tale from his world war Two service, and that there was a brothel by that name.
He chuckled. "Oh, Thank God. I'd hate to feel this bad if I wasn't having a good time."
I got my wisdom teeth pulled and when I woke up I was talking about the night terrors I had and the assistant goes "that explains the tensing and mild shaking, we thought we just hit a nerve or something" I proceeded to hit on her despite having a girlfriend WHOM I JUST FINISHED TALKING ABOUT. I also demanded my mom give me the keys cause I was driving us home. She told me not a chance and that im way too far gone to drive. This revelation made me quite upset. I also demanded my teeth back as they had come from my mouth therefore I owned them and i didnt want them being sold on the black market.... What did I learn that day? I do not handle drugs very well
When I got my last colonoscopy I told the doctor that last time I woke up early during the procedure.. He basically patted me on the head and said "no you didn't".
Lo and behold, I woke up half way through again. I dont think he liked me much.
I was in surgery for a C-section. I could hear the doctors quite clearly. As the surgeon started the incision I said, I can feel that. I heard a panic scuffle and went out, like a light.
When I was about 9, I needed to get two “baby teeth” removed, because they were stuck to my “adult teeth”. I remembered them telling me that one of the “funny things” I said was “Maybe I’ll stay here for a few days, a couple months maybe.” Shortly after, I was put into a wheelchair, and fell walking into the house. That, *that* I remember.
I woke up during my first stint being placed in my heart. I said "are we having fun, yet? The nurse said..."oh my GOD"
The best one I did was before a colonoscopy I broke out with the Star Trek music and did the You are going where no man has gone before. I had the doctors and nurses on the floor laughing.
I was having a toe amputated, the joint cut out and the toe reattached.
As the anesthetics started to work I apparently said "don't forget to reattach the toe on the left foot I don't want six (6) toes on my right.... right"
I had been tempted to put an arrow pointing to the toe in question before surgery and write "it's this one" on it in the same way that they put "not this leg" in the movies and episodes of House.
Before arm surgery I asked if I'll be able to play the piano after this. One of the nurses said, "aww, of course you will!" I said, "Cool, cuz I couldn't before. " The whole room laughed. Sucess. Out.
I had the sentence "hey Doc, is it normal to smell the chemical you are putting in my arm?" I never heard his awnser but i actually managed to say that quite normally before i resurfaced in the waking up room trying to remove the IV not knowing how it got there
If it was saline you might smell/taste it. YUCK!
That is a thing. IV injections travel straight up your arm with the blood and goes to your lungs. If it's high enough concentration, you might taste or smell whatever it is.
I always taste it
When i got my wisdom teeth removed I remember saying “Ah shit im getting high” the room exploded with laughter and i was out, they told my mum
Apparently, I suddenly spoke during a wisdom tooth extraction, both startling the dental surgeon & making blood spurt everywhere. All I remember is that I could suddenly see them & they were shouting. There was also quite a bit of blood. They were not amused.
Edited to correct autocorrect's nonsensical correction.
After having abdominal surgery the doctor came into the recovery room to check on me. I told him "YOU"RE THE MAN! The MASTER!" lol
I have 2 stories. As a teen after a minor procedure I woke up in bed at home, walked out to the living room and asked in confusion how we got home. Last year, after cataract surgery the first thing I remember is trying to coordinate a spoonful of applesauce into my mouth. The Dr. was explaining the complications that happened and it was so unsettling my mom fainted while all I was registering was how hungry I was.
My first cataract surgery The doctor forgot to deaden the optic nerve and I saw the surgery when I went in for the recheck a week later I said that was really unusual and the look on my doctor's face was complete shock The second surgery they didn't forget
Whenever I'm about to be put under, I thank the surgical team in advance for what they're about to do, then I steal a line from "The Hollow Man": "If I don't make it, pretend my last words were something witty and memorable."... Gets at least a chuckle every time.
I have a few stories the first was the most recent. I never went under anesthesia however I was talking about some seriously crazy things according to my wife. I acquired Legionnaires disease and it went on so long due to my former dr not seeing me in person but virtually because of a fever. They said I had the flu and prescribed meds for that hence the reason I waited for almost too long. I was having trouble walking, with balance dizziness, etc but when it got to the point I couldn't breathe my wife got me to the car and to the hospital. After all the tests were done, and I woke up later to my in-room phone ringing. It was my wife who said I was complaining that I don't want to talk I just want to sleep and play with my cool buckets. she said I said some other weird but funny things about the nurses being ninjas, I had been stabbed thousands of times and still can't be killed, and so on. Come to find out the disease messed with my blood sugar, made it to my brain and the high fevers were causing all sorts of delusions and hallucinations. The Dr later told us with as bad as it was he would not give me more than 24 hrs but would bet I would not have woken up to go to the hospital if my wife didn't make me go when she did which was 4 am I was shooting for 6 am.
The next story was when my kid dislocated his knee and was on morphine to reset it well after it was set and they were getting his knee brace, crutches, and paperwork he looked at the nurse and asked what she gave him. She told him morphine and he said "Morphine tried to kill me, I am so gonna kick morphine's ass!"
The last one was when I went in to have an impacted tooth removed and when I woke up they were having me stand up to move to the recovery room. Now the assistant that had to be no more than 5'1 and very petite had to help me. I looked at her and said, "Are you sure you can get me there, you are so tiny?" I said it like the old "she kicks so high" commercial.
It certainly does not help we have a weird sense of humor. Of course, as a husband, I do annoy my wife and she makes comments like "I can kill you" when I leave a mess. Now I just reply "You had your chance but messed that up" or when she calls me an idiot when I say something silly. I then reply "Well you said yes when I asked you to marry me, and you followed through so what does that make you" Of course being our spawn our son has a twisted sense of humor as well.
When I got a colonoscopy I turned to the lady doctor and said usually I get dinner before this.
The whole room cracked up.
The first time that I was knocked out by anesthesia was to get my wisdom teeth removed. I didn't actually say anything, but the last thing that I remember before getting knocked out was wondering what why it was taking so long for the anesthesia to knock me out. The next thing I remember, I was in a car driving home. Apparently, I woke up from the anesthesia and was fully conscious/functional before we left the building and even said several things that made sense/I seemed perfectly normal, but I don't remember anything I said or did during that time.
"Wait, what's the safe word?"
Had me rolling lmfao
When I went to the dentist I proved to be resistant to pain killers. Resistant to the point the dentist jabbed me around 3-4 times, and almost went insane when he started the surgery just to hear me mumble "ow." He pinched my lip because my haws don't open that wide.
So when I eventually got a medical surgery I told the anesthesiologist that I might be resistant. We had like a 30 second conversation before it came on suddenly.
I had surgery on the 3rd this jan, and i was out in 3 deep breaths. Woke up on a room and i was awake without they knowing
If you're a married man, next time you go in for a colonoscopy, ask the doctor to write a note to your wife/husband saying that "no, your head is nowhere to be found up there"😁
First time my daughter got laughing gas at the dentist. She couldn’t stop talking to the poor dentist. Hey hey Dr I like you, hey dr. I’m sitting in the corner trying not to laugh. She finally calmed down after about five minutes
"I broke my balls!"
- 3-Year-old me after getting a cavity removed
I will forever have extreme respect and gratitude to anesthesiologists. My first time going under as a kid i was having a hard time not having a panic attack. Someone promised me a popcicle afterwards but that didnt soothe my fears much. The anesthesiologists knew me and knew i loved spiders so they distracted me by asking me to teach them about spider anatomy as it was something i knew well. I remember someone holding my hand and feeling safe enough rather than piss terrified. Last things i said to them was “Im going to stop talking now since its getting hard. Thank you so much” i just remember waking up and asking if i could have my popcicle yet. I still remember the cherry flavor.
I was being put under for an MRI because I have muscle spasms when awake. the anesthesiologist said "Youre not going to remember me" I told her I would, and as they gave me the gas, it was taking a while since I am somewhat resistant to it, it seems. I suddenly felt pins and needles, then felt nothing. at all. and yet I was still awake while my body fell asleep. and I said "Whelp, here I go." And passed out immediately. needless to say, I remember all of it.
I got my wisdom teeth put back in high school. That was when I learned I have more resistance to anesthesia because I definitely woke up before they were finished. It felt like they were taking a hammer to my tooth for about 30 seconds, and I could see the shapes of the dental surgeons. I think they were shocked (needless to say) and quickly up my dosage because I went back under very quickly after I looked at them.
Same but with a broken arm. Im pretty sure that is why I was so scared of everything after that until age 12.
(Knowing I have at least 2 surgeries coming in the future I hope my body didn’t get any more resistent to them)
@@Ramon_nN1alt Ouch, that’s so much worse! And good luck with both of your future surgeries!
@@SarahDuke01 ty lol
I woke up from anesthesia to hear the doctor say, “We sure don’t want the state board to hear about this one.” At my check up with the doctor a week later, I inquired “if anything unusual happened during the procedure”. The doctor played dumb.
Wasn't from going under, but in recovery from getadrenal gland removed, a nurse told me to press the help button if I needed anything. I waited a few minutes and pressed it. Nurses voice : "Do you need something?" Me : "I just checked, and it looks like the penis enlargement surgery didn't work. In fact, I think it's even smaller." I smiled to myself as I heard the whole nurses station erupt in laughter.
When they wheeled me in after I broke my hip (bicycle crash in full spandex) I asked, "Is this where we're auditioning for _The Incredible Shrinking Man_ ?
When I had my appendix out in 2013, i remember them asking if I needed anything before I was out, and I asked “yeah, could you remove about 50 lbs while you’re in there?” There were a few chuckles and then I was gone
I remember talking to the guy walking my bed to the actual surgery room. We were talking about Scrubs TV show and how it is not a real doctor show. Somebody yell from down the hall we passed, "Yes it is!!!!"
I woke up after major dental surgery with the surgery staff in the room. I said "Oh look, it's a party now!"
The first time I went under (for an endoscopy) I didn't fall asleep right away. The lights were off, I had the thing in my mouth to keep it open, and we were waiting for me to fall asleep. After 10 seconds, I said, "Still awake guys." After 5 more seconds, "Still awake." I heard the anesthesiologist say, "Oh, it's kinked" and then I was waking up.
You can’t have a tummy tuck at the same time as a c-section.
1. You’re still swollen
2. A c-section is a “clean” surgery whereas a tummy tuck requires a “sterile” surgery. (I asked if my OB could repair my hernia during a c-section and this is how he explained it.)
3. You have other sutures in the way that need to heal before bringing in your muscles and removing loose skin.
I was given ketamine as an anesthetic when I broke my forearm. The thing with ketamine is that it doesn't really send you to sleep, the nurses just gaslight you into thinking you're asleep but I didn't fall for any of their bullshit so I still remember everything from the surgery. Anyways, when it was done one of them told me I would probably not remember out interaction so I made it my life's fucking mission to remember him. Every time he entered my room I told him I knew who he was and it got so annoying my mom had to restrain me from harrassing the poor guy.
"Wait! I forgot to save my progress!"
At christmas I had kidney surgery, I was told to count down from 10. after 0 I went to -26, next I was in recovery. It takes a lot to knock me out and longer for me to wake up.
I was laughing because of the "take care of the little guy" and then went full surprised mode when i saw story 39 when u thought i saw 4 or 5 storys and i see "story 39" ...
About 15 years ago I had surgery on my mouth and jaw, I remember talking and laughing about the ducks on my feet ( I was wearing my house shoes) and then my husband had to go to work. 3 days was in between those 2 memories and I have no idea what happened.
When I was just about to go under anesthesia for a minor surgery, I heard a rather funny line from one of the docs. I did hear the subject of the conversation - they were talking about ink pens - but when taken out of context, what he said was hilarious to me.
"We've lost three just this morning!" (Very cool to hear that from a doc just before going under. :P)
Now, my mother had been subjected to anesthesia before and she told me she didn't remember anything from a while before, and a while after it. And I was concerned that I would forget that line upon waking up, and I thought it a shame, because I really wanted to tell my dad about it.
Turns out, when I came to, I very much did remember it and was more than happy to tell him about it when I saw him. XD
Wait 'til you're in for a colonoscopy and the doctor and the nurse-anesthetist remark that the cafeteria will be serving Boston butt....
When I had my wisdom teeth out, as soon as the anesthesia started hitting me, I told the dentist or whoever was there all about the fantasy world that I had invented, which was inspired by 'Fantasia' in the movie 'The Neverending Story.'
I went in to get my tonsils out at 25. I had recently watched Monty Python's The Meaning of Life. I was loopy as I was being wheeled into the operating room, I told the nurses and doctors to please not lose me in the room, like the birth scene in the movie. Apparently the last thing I asked was "where is the machine that goes bing?"
Guy I know was having inguinal hernia surgery, and had his knees up and spread and the the whole area swabbed down. Being the kind of personality that can pull it off, he warned the OR staff "If I wake up and I'm a a woman, there's going to be hell to pay." Apparently it went over pretty well.
I needed emergency stomach surgery and was going into the theater I apparently said "I don't want to go to this theater... Is there something better in that other one? I think I've seen this show already... it was awful and there was no popcorn"... I had had surgery in the same hospital a few years earlier (had also been stomach surgery... different surgeon) and the surgery had been in the same theater.
At the time I had been on a morphine drip for the previous 3 days and was pretty loopy even before the pre-surgery meds
Having a myomectomy done, for some reason I gave my surgeon's team a full lecture on how to do a merge with Microsoft Word and Excel. I head the attending ask my surgeon what was I talking about and he told him not to worry, that's the kind of work I do. No idea why I did that, considering I loathe doing merges.
my story when I was little managed to get a BIG splinter under my thumb the nail needed to be removed. I was given night night juice kid safe, they had a kid movie playing in the room. I was scared out of my mind mom, nurse and doctor couldn't understand why are you still awake. apparently enough fear countered it or that's what I think so watched staying still whimpering. they finished bandaged my thumb and done.
I was going to do a fibula surgery. I was lying on the operating table, just waiting for them to set everything up. Then I blink for a second and ask “are you guys going to start yet?”. Then my mom replies “it’s already over”. I then realized I was back in my hospital room with my leg on a cast.
i would just scream "IM NOT ASLEEP YET B-" then fall asleep
I looked at mine and said,” wow ! Where are the olives with That Martini?”
I woke up in the middle of surgery, when they put me back under, I said, "Why do they seafood restaurants at Sea World?, and if you're eating there, are you eating the slow learners?"