Surgeons, what's the funniest thing a patient has said under anesthesia?

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  • Опубликовано: 21 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 242

  • @Munchkin.Of.Pern09
    @Munchkin.Of.Pern09 9 месяцев назад +119

    When I was coming back from anaesthesia after getting my wisdom teeth out, I asked for a pen and paper so I could write down what it felt like in case I needed to write about a character coming back from anaesthetic for a fanfic. Priorities lol.

    • @Munchkin.Of.Pern09
      @Munchkin.Of.Pern09 9 месяцев назад +18

      I can vaguely remember the phrase “my head is as full of cotton as my mouth.”

    • @daninb8939
      @daninb8939 9 месяцев назад +2

      Salute, my friend

    • @Wolfie54545
      @Wolfie54545 9 месяцев назад +2

      I just took mental notes

    • @BrightBlueInk
      @BrightBlueInk 7 месяцев назад +2

      I feel like this is something I would do, oh no

    • @MorganChaos
      @MorganChaos 6 месяцев назад

      I didn't do any such thing because I was unaware that I felt different in any way until I tried to stand up and had to like, direct my fall so I landed back in the recovery armchair lmao.

  • @BoxOKittens
    @BoxOKittens 9 месяцев назад +82

    A few years ago my mom had to have anesthesia for a biopsy. On the drive home she wanted one of those little fudge sundaes from McDonalds. But she wanted extra fudge. A LOT of extra fudge. I left her dozing in the car, went in, and explained to some teenager that my loopy mother really wanted a fudge sundae that was about 90% fudge. And he gave me exactly that. It was solid fudge with a hint of vanilla at the bottom.
    The tragedy is that I took my mom home and she immediately passed out with the sundae sitting forgotten on her bedside table.

    • @KitKat10281
      @KitKat10281 5 месяцев назад +1

      Aww, that's an adorable story, all the way around! I would totally have taken a photo of said sundae and then proceeded to wreck it myself after mom passed out, though! 😂

  • @tanyapoe5490
    @tanyapoe5490 9 месяцев назад +346

    Not because of anesthesia but when I was 19, I was in a car accident and I was technically unconscious but was still talking. I kept telling my mom that she shouldn't worry because it would take more than that to get rid of me. I had absolutely no clue that any of this happened. I "woke up" about 4 hrs. later. My memory of 7 pm - 2 am is completely gone.

    • @StarSailor1343
      @StarSailor1343 9 месяцев назад +21

      A warrior’s spirit, through and through.

    • @BeeWhistler
      @BeeWhistler 9 месяцев назад +19

      Definitely more metal than my brother, who kept asking what had happened and how he got there and then saying he remembered everything. Repeat, the rest of the night. The nurses were cracking up.

    • @BriansRainbowOverIreland
      @BriansRainbowOverIreland 9 месяцев назад +16

      Was in the hospital once for alcohol poisoning. Mom said “you could have died!” And I replied “I wouldn’t have, god isn’t gonna make it THAT easy for me”

    • @StarSailor1343
      @StarSailor1343 9 месяцев назад +1

      @@BriansRainbowOverIreland I read this to the verse of “What’s Up?” by 4 Non Blondes

    • @BriansRainbowOverIreland
      @BriansRainbowOverIreland 9 месяцев назад +6

      @@StarSailor1343 so I wake in the morning in a hospital bed and I try to get out the words in my head but I, I’m feeling… way too drunk still… and then I threw up and passed out on the bathroom floor and nurse came in and asked what for and I told her… I really like the floor! And I said (throws up more)

  • @dasapples
    @dasapples 9 месяцев назад +186

    I yelled “WELCOME TO THE THUNDERDOME” right before I passed out once

    • @zahando4613
      @zahando4613 9 месяцев назад +8

      😂😂💀
      I once woke up in the middle of the night and kept asking for the water bottle cap
      And when I had a fever, I kept saying to my mom that I needed to go to Facebook

    • @StarSailor1343
      @StarSailor1343 9 месяцев назад +7

      How was the fall

    • @Multifandom.Moon.Edits.
      @Multifandom.Moon.Edits. 9 месяцев назад +7

      I almost choked on my ice cream because I started laughing at this

    • @SimpliStrawberri
      @SimpliStrawberri 9 месяцев назад +3

      @@zahando4613what 😂

    • @BeanKally
      @BeanKally 8 месяцев назад +3

      @@StarSailor1343IF YOU WANNA LOOK AROUND

  • @peacefulgrotesque1510
    @peacefulgrotesque1510 9 месяцев назад +134

    8:59 What the doctor said: "I'm the only man that has been in here, so I assure you no one came in and pooped on your bed."
    What she heard: "It was ME"

  • @quantumslasher
    @quantumslasher 9 месяцев назад +202

    The "hitler has only got one ball" is sung to Colonel Bogey March. There's a few different versions. If you look up that line you'll find many versions of the song on youtube.

    • @twilight8045
      @twilight8045 9 месяцев назад +26

      Hitler has got one ball!
      Göring has two but very small
      Himmler has something sim'lar
      But poor old Goebbels has no ball at all!

    • @dadoctah
      @dadoctah 9 месяцев назад +19

      You can find the melody in "Bridge on the River Kwai". When the movie came out, a lot of people who had sung it during the war had to explain to their civilian friends what was so funny because in the film the tune was only whistled.

    • @MJRuda
      @MJRuda 8 месяцев назад +1

      I sang it to the tune of "Discord" by The Living Tombstone😂

    • @hallidayshaneen
      @hallidayshaneen 7 месяцев назад

      Uk version
      Hitler only has one ball,
      The other is in the Albert Hall,
      His mother, the dirty bugger cut it off when he was small,
      She threw it into an apple tree it fell down to the deep blue sea. The fishes got out there, dishes, and had scallops and bollox for tea.

    • @real_nosferatu
      @real_nosferatu 4 месяца назад +1

      Immediately scrolled to the comments to look for this

  • @AerCloud
    @AerCloud 9 месяцев назад +35

    I forgot English and very angrily accused the nurse of stealing my socks. In fluent Irish Gaelic, which she did not speak.

  • @kelleywyskiel3478
    @kelleywyskiel3478 9 месяцев назад +27

    My grandmother coming off anesthesia began sternly going off about, “ you can’t have my new Lincoln “ to my cousin who owned car lots and had sold it to her.
    My daughter coming off from wisdom teeth was fine, then suddenly started sobbing hysterically into a full panic meltdown as I was bringing to car around, thinking I left her. It was so intense the surgeon was crying, the nurses were crying, I still have trauma from wondering why she thought I’d leave her.

  • @mztweety1374
    @mztweety1374 9 месяцев назад +44

    “ If I code, play kickstart my heart while you do cpr”😂😂

  • @maniacalworm
    @maniacalworm 9 месяцев назад +30

    when my older sister got her wisdom teeth out, after the procedure, she was laying on the couch and there was a towel hanging on the door and she said "who is that person doing a handstand over there?"

  • @PinkNinjanerd
    @PinkNinjanerd 9 месяцев назад +91

    I was the patient. I had anesthesia for a surgery to get a giant cist out. My mom and the doctor were at my sides. I'd apparently complained about my throat hurting (from a tube being shoved in there), so the doctor offered to get me a popsicle, saying there were mango popsicles. I enthusiastically and dramatically said "I hate mango." But then when they said there was also an orange flavored popsicle, I said all happy and excited "I LOVE orange!"
    I also said at some point that I was going to take a nap, closed my eyes, then proceeded to open them up again and say "That was a good nap", when not even a minute had passed.

    • @rai1578
      @rai1578 8 месяцев назад +7

      This reminds me so much of my experience with anesthesia when I was a kid haha. I had an upper endoscopy (also involves a tube being shoved down your throat) and they offered me one of those push-pop things. I started raving about how excited I was for it, how it had been so long since I had a push pop, and how nice it was of them to give me one. I think I even told one of the doctors or nurses that I loved them lol
      Anesthesia + popsicles = big emotions

    • @PinkNinjanerd
      @PinkNinjanerd 8 месяцев назад +2

      @@rai1578 can't argue with that logic lmao XD

    • @Aquarios1337.
      @Aquarios1337. 8 месяцев назад +1

      I can relate to the good nap part, as I have done that when not even on anything.

    • @UrfavLuna1234
      @UrfavLuna1234 3 месяца назад

      😭😭😭 I’m loving those stories I’m just scared what it can do to me

  • @rinpaisys
    @rinpaisys 9 месяцев назад +124

    14:55 drunk words are sober thoughts, but drugged words are drugged thoughts.

    • @supranova565
      @supranova565 9 месяцев назад +11

      good way to put it

    • @MorganChaos
      @MorganChaos 6 месяцев назад +5

      Yeah, being drunk takes your walls down but it doesn't make you hallucinate. Drugs absolutely can make you hallucinate, lol. Although, to be fair, I could believe a drunk person might get fucked up enough that they started recounting something like that and they forget to say "this was a recurring nightmare I had as a child," leading to some questions lol.

  • @KittyMama61
    @KittyMama61 9 месяцев назад +65

    When my mom was coming out from anesthesia, she kept gesturing toward her nose, making swiping motions. When the nurse asked her what she was doing, she said she was trying to get those tampons out of there.

    • @DubYuhGChoppa
      @DubYuhGChoppa 9 месяцев назад +3

      I've read a few comments and I think you definitely win

  • @drewholmes7356
    @drewholmes7356 9 месяцев назад +35

    Thunderdong should be a prideful nickname.

  • @JC130676
    @JC130676 9 месяцев назад +112

    I had a coworker who said something funny way, waaaayyyy after the anesthesia wore out. He'd had a wisdom tooth removed because the root kept growing, to the point where it caused a bulge on the underside of his jaw. He was describing how the procedure didn't go as easy as hoped and he said about the doctor (who according to him was stunningly beautiful) : "She actually had to use both hands to pull it out, and when she finally succeeded she was amazed by how big it was." Dead silence for two seconds while everyone was staring at each other before we all started roaring with laughter. Only then did he realize the double meaning of what he'd just said. Yes, we all have dirty minds...

    • @BeeWhistler
      @BeeWhistler 9 месяцев назад +6

      That's what she said? lol

    • @DubYuhGChoppa
      @DubYuhGChoppa 9 месяцев назад +6

      Well he was talking about an operation lmao I'm sure he wasn't thinking of the implications like y'all were

  • @contortionyx
    @contortionyx 9 месяцев назад +16

    When my sister got her wisdom teeth out, a nurse/assistant was helping her to get in the van while mom went to the driver side. Mom heard a muffled thump and what she thought was crying coming from my sister. Mom rushed around to help thinking she'd fallen & gotten hurt only to see her sitting up, laughing her ass off barely getting out "I can't get in the van". The nurse/assistant said she was struggling to lift her leg high enough and for some reason my sister thought that was the funniest thing ever.
    My "funny" story of getting my wisdom teeth out is that I tried to exit the van while my mom was still driving it :) got the door open and everything. Luckily, we had made it home and were in the driveway so we weren't moving *fast* but that thing's just rock & gravel. Mom grabbed my arm and refused to let me go until she was able to shut the van off. Love you Mom💖

  • @graybee0209
    @graybee0209 9 месяцев назад +32

    I got top surgery when I was 20 and only got a couple of hours of sleep the night before since my surgery was early in the morning, after surgery the nurses kept waking me up to make sure i still knew who i was and where i was and every time they did i kept asking if i could go back to sleep. At one point, before i went back to sleep, I looked over to the nursing student and said “Im glad i got that off my chest” and heard her laugh before falling back asleep

  • @tarikdajedhai6530
    @tarikdajedhai6530 9 месяцев назад +64

    Waking from having my right breast removed do to cancer at 16, i come too squeazing the recover nurses breasts with my hands complete with honking noises

    • @charlottebeads
      @charlottebeads 9 месяцев назад +3

      oh shit

    • @KitKat10281
      @KitKat10281 5 месяцев назад +2

      Honestly a pretty funny and rather wholesome outcome for such a traumatic experience you had to go through. Hope all is well nowadays! ❤

  • @wizrad1277
    @wizrad1277 9 месяцев назад +17

    First and only time I went under for a procedure, I accused my doctor of stabbing me and stealing my face instead of removing my wisdom teeth like he was supposed to.

  • @kelleywyskiel3478
    @kelleywyskiel3478 9 месяцев назад +16

    My only anesthesia memory was a second surgery after the first went very badly and I almost died from sepsis. Anyways, I’m being rolled out by the team, my surgeon was telling me that I need to warn anyone in the future that I’m violent swinging on anesthesia, which I don’t remember, but I do remember looking at my bare foot and asking where my sock went and then crying because I lost my sock. He said I lost it in the fight….
    I remember nothing. But I do know I wasn’t happy about going into the surgery.

  • @tengo_hambru
    @tengo_hambru 9 месяцев назад +18

    btw not being able to handle anesthesia can also mean that you have either strong or very strong side effects like my mom i think gets really sick and she gets a massive headache

  • @amberspicks547
    @amberspicks547 9 месяцев назад +18

    It doesn’t bring out facts, but does bring out truths… in the sense that it reveals things that are inside people’s minds… including recurring dreams and fears, etc. I don’t know if I’m being clear about what I mean, but I hope so

  • @Rave12612
    @Rave12612 8 месяцев назад +4

    I said it after i woke up from it but i remember saying something like “is what it feels like to be drunk?”

  • @Chaos_God_of_Fate
    @Chaos_God_of_Fate 9 месяцев назад +17

    I apologized for throwing a Mattress out my 3rd story bedroom window- I felt so bad about it. I even remember it a bit- I had a dream while under and that was the dream. I thought they'd taken me to the hospital because there was something wrong with me after I'd thrown my matress out the window, like I'd done it because I needed medical treatment for something. I remember how confused I was when they laughed and told it that wasn't real. I also thought I was in a medical bed sitting inside a gymnasium, basketball hoops and all and thought it was a huge waste of space for just one patient. I had a bunch of other hallucinations- I still wonder what the heck they had me on while I was there! In the end I was just in Hospital and had been in a coma for a few Days.
    I'd passed out in the middle of the street while it was raining because I had Pneumonia and a terrible sinus infection that had me blowing ketchup out my nose. My neighbor found Me, getting mail in the rain at 1AM. They put me in a coma. If I hadn't passed out in the middle of the street and that neighbor hadn't found me by getting the mail at that unlikely time I probably would have died, I was just toughing out the super-cold. The only reason I was out there was to fetch a liquor bottle that I'd forgotten from my Car- weird just how lucky I got. I very vaguely remember crawling around in the street trying to get inside, but I was extremely out of it and then the lights of the Ambulance, and that's about it. Don't remember the neighbor at all. Something wants Me in the World- I've been that close to death more times than I like to think about.

  • @Fusako8
    @Fusako8 9 месяцев назад +8

    From me to my anesthetist when I was being put under at age 16 "I can't relax my fist because it isn't listening to me anymore!" I had cripplingly bad needlephobia, and this resulted in hysterical paralysis due to the IV in said arm. I also took a couple times as much anesthesia as would be typical for someone of my bodyweight. . . and burned it off stupidly fast. What can I say, I had a hummingbird metabolism at that age.

  • @nightthorn1233
    @nightthorn1233 9 месяцев назад +7

    When I was a child and was coming off of anesthesia, I proceeded to watch a very inappropriate show in front of my mom.

  • @linroos5252
    @linroos5252 9 месяцев назад +7

    I woke up after surgery and started telling the doctor about vampire hunting.

  • @dualcaster
    @dualcaster 9 месяцев назад +11

    dr kawasaki was mad as hell lmao

  • @janemiettinen5176
    @janemiettinen5176 9 месяцев назад +6

    Friend, whose husband had a pill habit, had to have major stomach surgery and she got a Valium as a pre medication. “I just dont get it, these pills are so overrated”, she uttered to her hubby, just before it kicked in. Minute later she was standing up on her bed, telling the whole medical crew trying to haul her into the surgery how they were obviously “all devil’s minions, doing devil’s work”, pointing fingers at each person. They were able to get her down, but she was still sitting up as they started to wheel her away, arms crossed and shooting stink eye to everybody. She is usually very calm, undramatic and non-religious personality, which makes this even funnier. This might be one of my favorite stories.

  • @JanMaynz
    @JanMaynz 9 месяцев назад +2

    Thunderdong sent me over the edge 😂😂😂 I was laughing at all of these, (except the sad one, wtf) but that poor man! 😂😂😂

  • @Fabala827
    @Fabala827 9 месяцев назад +4

    Two things from when I got my wisdom teeth out in high school. The first one I don’t remember, but apparently I started shifting around in recovery, and when the doctor asked me what I was doing, I said, “I’m going to do a handstand,” without leaving my curled-up position on the cot. Then in the car on the way home, the anesthesia was making me feel nauseous so I started crying about feeling nauseous. My cousin/foster sister was there when I got home, and she said, “oh no, if you cry, it’s going to make me cry too!” Then I started laughing uncontrollably while still half crying lol

  • @KrazyKatLady9393
    @KrazyKatLady9393 9 месяцев назад +22

    I had ketamine when I had my c section, it was a terrifying trip. It made me think I was dead.

    • @mm9374
      @mm9374 9 месяцев назад +2

      I had the same thing from ether. I thought I was in the graveyard where souls went when they died. I was 6 years old.

    • @1bootliz
      @1bootliz 8 месяцев назад +1

      Terrifying is the right word, except the one time I had it there wasn't enough "me" left to feel any emotions. I was SO relieved to get my body back again! 😅

  • @shinymegaabsollover9757
    @shinymegaabsollover9757 9 месяцев назад +17

    I have a few funny stories about how one of my cousins and 2 of my siblings acted after getting their wisdom teeth removed while still being high on pain meds and anesthesia. None of them remember these situations.
    1. My cousin didn’t recognize my aunt (her mother) at all. On the way home she kept yelling that she was being kidnapped and that my aunt needed to let her go. She attempted to open the car doors and jump out of the moving car. Luckily the doors were locked.
    2. When my sibling came out of anesthesia the nurse was explaining to them that they wouldn’t be able to use straws for a bit because they wouldn’t be able to suck with them. My sibling immediately responded with “So I can’t suck dick?” with our mom in the room. To make this even funnier my sibling was single at the time and is still a virgin. They had never and still haven’t sucked dick before. But the hilarity didn’t stop! My mom bought smoothies on the way home for everyone since it was something that my sibling could consume. But since they couldn’t use a straw, they had to use a spoon. They kept yelling about how they couldn’t get the smoothie in their mouth and that they were making a mess. The entire time one of my younger cousins, who was 4 or 5 at the time I think, was trying to clean them up and giggling.
    3. My sister probably handled her anesthesia the best out of everyone I mentioned. But she did have trouble regaining consciousness and then staying conscious after she woke up. On the way back home she kept criticizing my sibling’s driving skills and called them a “f*cking dumb*ss,”. My sibling found this hilarious, especially since this was not too long after they had gotten a really bad speeding ticket and my sister almost never swears.

  • @jcookiecakes9018
    @jcookiecakes9018 9 месяцев назад +11

    I watched all the videos on this channel. I listen to these while I work. I wish the videos were longer they are great

  • @Catherinzsl
    @Catherinzsl 9 месяцев назад +9

    3:38 _I'm coming out... of anaesthesia!_

  • @ZA-mb5di
    @ZA-mb5di 9 месяцев назад +15

    Not under anesthesia yet, but I told my jaw surgeon to play Michael Jackson music before administering the propofol

  • @PimguOPM
    @PimguOPM 9 месяцев назад +5

    “I bet you kill it with the ladies” 4:30 is actually incredible

  • @BrightBlueInk
    @BrightBlueInk 7 месяцев назад +4

    When my husband got a wisdom tooth removed, a nurse was telling me about how to use teabags against the wound to help with the bleeding, and my husband (who had just gotten out of the surgery) responded "also great for scaring away British vampires."
    The funniest part is this is absolutely the sort of stupid joke he would say completely sober.

  • @witnessproductions17
    @witnessproductions17 9 месяцев назад +6

    my sister got three wisdom teeth out. when she woke up, she immediately started crying and asking for me specifically. while our dad was finishing up some paperwork at the front desk, my sister flipped off the monitor, took a picture of her doing so, posted it on snapchat, and then kept crying.

  • @cadcar13
    @cadcar13 9 месяцев назад +14

    I was laughing out loud at several of these ones! Thanks for the laughs!❤

  • @LiviaAfton333
    @LiviaAfton333 7 месяцев назад +1

    U remember I was at the dentist and had to have a tooth surgery and I was put under laughing gas, they had music on. They had Bye Bye Bye and I started Singh my heart out apparently

  • @Kanako_ketsunake
    @Kanako_ketsunake 8 месяцев назад +2

    Here’s my story, I was the one under anesthesia
    I was being wheeled out to my moms car after I got a tooth pulled, damn tooth had a cavity down to the ROOT, and I felt like sh*t, but euphoric too, and I said to the nurse afterwards “thank you for your service” and right before she left, I said “I love you!”

  • @hiim-d9v
    @hiim-d9v 9 месяцев назад +5

    I forgot what the surgery was for but it was either a gum graft or wisdom teeth removal. While they were waking me up from anesthesia apparently I looked pale so they brought me a puke bag. The first thing I said when I woke up was damn that’s a giant condom.

  • @RedX101
    @RedX101 9 месяцев назад +4

    Ages ago I said “is this heaven?” or something like that.

  • @EvonneSol
    @EvonneSol 9 месяцев назад +2

    Personal favorite - I was going in for some kind of scan and operation due to an infection. While they're dosing me up and injecting the dye into the affected area, I start flirting with one of the assistants that was helping out. Here's the thing: it was a bladder infection, I was a fifteen year old girl with no idea how to flirt, and the poor guy was married. So while the team's bustling about to get this whole situation figured out I'm telling the poor man how cute he is and how I wanted to take someone just like him to senior prom in a few years. Super cringy, but it made one of the other guys laugh hysterically. I had a similar situation a year later when I fractured something in my knee ... with a female on staff, that time. Apparently dosed up me thinks anyone's cute that's outside my age range, prepping me for a procedure, and way out of my league.

  • @Albanwinter
    @Albanwinter 9 месяцев назад +2

    I'm such a lightweight when it comes to painkillers etc. that I really didn't say anything ridiculous under anesthesia. About the only thing I recall saying was how brave this little kid was that was next to me in pre-op. He had come in with a burst appendix and he wasn't whining, crying or complaining even before they gave him the pre-op drugs. After my surgery when I was just on heavy duty pain medication I kept telling the nurse to take my IV out. She kept telling me that I needed that there for the pain medication. Me: "No, take it out. It's annoying." Her: "Is it hurting you?" Me (whining): "No, but it's annoying." Her: "I bet you can't even feel it." Me: "I know it's there, it's annoying." No matter who came into the room, my mom, the nurse, the orderlies, heck even my brother-in-law on the phone...they knew that IV was annoying. And speaking of orderlies...There was this drop dead gorgeous one that worked there and I would get mad when he'd have to come in to help me because, of course, my butt is hanging out of the gown. I have a feeling he probably thought I hated him because at one point I actually said "Oh does it have to be him?"
    When I had my wisdom teeth out I kept going completely to sleep but I wasn't supposed to. They were only applying laughing gas to keep me chilled out so they had to keep adjusting the gas every fifteen minutes or so.
    My plastic surgery I was so out of it afterwards I actually couldn't talk. There was another woman in that recovery room that was looped out on the drugs and she kept trying to get up to go home. I was getting angrier and angrier at her and I wanted to scream at her to shut up and lay down because she was disturbing my nice sleep. But like I said, couldn't talk, couldn't even get out a squeak.

  • @phoenixcalling
    @phoenixcalling 2 месяца назад

    Apparently "I NEED TO POOP!" was the first thing that came out of my mouth when I started waking up from jaw surgery

  • @Void_Th3_W0lf
    @Void_Th3_W0lf 9 месяцев назад +1

    Never been on anesthesia I don't think, but sometimes when my mom has to come wake me up because I slept in (usually I get very little sleep those nights) I say some odd stuff on a half-asleep brain. I remember proclaiming to her "I didn't know time existed"

  • @epsu1427
    @epsu1427 9 месяцев назад +3

    Thank's for a new funny video. I loved this video❤ I cracked up at almost everything

  • @nightthorn1233
    @nightthorn1233 9 месяцев назад +1

    I’ve gone through a lot of procedures, since I was a child where I had to be put under anesthesia, and have essentially taught myself how to quickly wake up enough once I am aware so I can get out of there quickly. I believe it was originally due to my dislike of having an IV in my hand. I definitely used it to get the leg squisher off when I had appendicitis as a teenager.

    • @nightthorn1233
      @nightthorn1233 9 месяцев назад

      I will say that my siblings were quite disappointed that I was only merely grumpy after I had my wisdom teeth out.

  • @lindabruns6020
    @lindabruns6020 3 месяца назад

    Oh my God I was laughing out loud at some of these 🤣. HILARIOUS!!! I hope to God I never divulged anything during any of my surgeries!

  • @vickiesmith3021
    @vickiesmith3021 9 месяцев назад

    Absolutely FANTASTIC reading. THANK YOU.

  • @spiritedaway0tutu
    @spiritedaway0tutu 6 месяцев назад +1

    I am normally a very polite, kind, and nonviolent person that would rather sink through the floor than make a nurse upset. The last surgery I had, I woke up and IMMEDIATELY tried to throw hands with the nearest nurse.
    Turns out, they messed up my meds and post surgical care and I was in an insane amount of pain.
    Apparently, large amounts of pain mixed with anesthesia turn me into a heavyweight boxer. Who knew?

  • @theduchessofspring2395
    @theduchessofspring2395 6 месяцев назад +3

    I went in for a colonoscopy/endoscopy in my early 30s. As I was coming out of the anesthesia in a recovery room with my mother present to help me get re-dressed once I was sober enough, I responded to the two nurses' inquiry about how I was feeling with, "I dreamt I was riding through the clouds on a winged Pistachio M&M!" My mom instantly burst my happy-drunk bubble by saying " Baby, they don't make Pistachio M&Ms." I started balling my eyes out.
    Also, the stuff they have you drink in order to flush out your colon for the colonoscopy is just disgusting!🤢🤮

  • @christophernodurft1868
    @christophernodurft1868 9 месяцев назад +11

    The "Hitler has only got one ball" is sung to "March from the River Kwai". That's the whistling song from The Bridge on the River Kwai.

    • @ColonelMayfair
      @ColonelMayfair 9 месяцев назад +3

      Yeah, they had to whistle it in the movie because of the lyrics, but EVERYONE who lived through WWII knew what song that was.

  • @spiritedaway0tutu
    @spiritedaway0tutu 6 месяцев назад +1

    My dad once woke up from surgery and tried to write my mom a note on the drive home from the hospital. According to him, he could read it just fine and was very upset she wasn’t reading it. According to *her,* who was trying very hard not to crash the car while her loopy husband tried to shove a sticky note in her face, what he had *actually* written was a line of squiggles, with no discernible letters to be found.

  • @anonymousanonymous2625
    @anonymousanonymous2625 4 месяца назад +1

    I just had a major surgery where they did a spinal block and,A general because of an airway concern. As I was sitting up, leaning on the nurse getting the block, I told her about all the little Japanese people making ice cream just like on RUclips. Then I started to cry because I had to fast for surgery and couldn't have any ice cream. I think she told me we'd come back after surgery for ice ream.

  • @PinkAndPathetic
    @PinkAndPathetic 7 месяцев назад +2

    After waking up from anesthesia after a heart transplant, the doctor was talking to my parents basically saying where I'm going to be, where to find my recovery room, and all that. After he was done talking, I tried my best to ask "Will this be before or after the surgery" and he says "The surgery is already done" and I just gave a defeated "Oh" I was so out of it I didn't even realize the surgery was already completed.

  • @pumacatmeow
    @pumacatmeow 2 месяца назад

    Story 16 is heartbreaking 😭😭

  • @eternal8song
    @eternal8song 8 месяцев назад +1

    Apparently I once told the anaesthesiologist, as he was putting me under for a routine angiogram, all about how cool my sister is.
    She's not cool. I love her anyway, but idk what I was thinking.

  • @vitalricecakes8274
    @vitalricecakes8274 7 месяцев назад +2

    I went under for the first of 2 upper endoscopies and was transported into the OR before i was sedated, the surgeon introduced himself and said i was allowed to keep my stuffed animal and blanket (childrens hospital and i was like 9) so i liked him. Then he told me i was gonna get really sleepy and to count to 10. My newly doped child brain decided that if i didnt count to 10, i wouldnt fall asleep. I instead sang my ABCs (much to the bewildered amusement of the OR staff) and promptly knocked out by F.
    Now the second endoscopy, they put me down BEFORE i got to the OR. All i remember is thinking that a coat hook resembled a donkey and for some reason found it hilarious, so i was absolutely HOWLING with laughter as they wheeled me down the hall, past the intake rooms of many other kids, while trying to keep me from laughing myself out of the bed. They never sedated me outside the OR again.

  • @abigailpaolini3480
    @abigailpaolini3480 3 месяца назад +1

    i had surgery, apparently got ketamine before/during and woke up from anesthesia absolutely sobbing, saying “i want my mom” over and over again. even when they brought my mom in from the waiting room and she was hugging me, i still kept crying and saying “i want my mom” over and over. at my post op appointment, my doctor explained that ketamine makes you super emotional, and what i was doing was normal 😂

  • @wendyryder2708
    @wendyryder2708 9 месяцев назад +5

    I have asthma and have occasionally had to go to hospital for it! They gave me a LOT OF VENTOLIN AND ALSO GAVE ME A NEBULISER MACHINE TO USE! All this made me a bit high and when a nurse came in to take some blood, I apparently said “Are you a vampire”? My eldest daughter was sitting on the chair next to the bed and when she heard me say that she was mortified! lol!

  • @WillowsVeganBakery
    @WillowsVeganBakery 8 месяцев назад +1

    Oh my gosh, I once just woke up from it when I was about 8 (I needed intense dental care) and said "Oh shoot, sorry guys, I fell asleep. I was so tired earlier". I said some other things that I don't remember. Later I almost DIED of embarrassment.
    I do remember that I also started talking about random RUclipsrs that I hated, giving very animated descriptions of why I hated them.

  • @aliecarey
    @aliecarey 9 месяцев назад +4

    Puppy on amphetamines 😂😂

  • @BaePlatinum
    @BaePlatinum 7 месяцев назад +1

    Not under anesthesia, but when I was waking up from a seizure. This is the postictal state, or as my mom likes to call it, "the lights are on but nobody's home" phase.
    I've said and done a lot of hilarious stuff while postictal. However, the time I kept repeating "I love Dio" as in Dio Brando from JJBA has to take the cake as the funniest.

  • @bluebirdbeliever1777
    @bluebirdbeliever1777 7 месяцев назад +1

    When I was little in elementary /middle school I had Sergey on my heels cuz they were about to burst I was poked by a pen so I poked them back before I woke up all the way and I hided under the blanket laughing not knowing what was happening saying I was hungry

  • @PandorasMusicBox680
    @PandorasMusicBox680 Месяц назад +1

    My mom woke up after major spinal surgery to put bolts into her spine (tried to relive pressure that built up). I hadn’t seen her for 10 hours, and she just looked at me and said, “Mother, leave me alone, I need to do my homework,” and promptly went back to sleep. Congrats, ma.
    (Happened in March this year btw)

  • @angelalandgraf3547
    @angelalandgraf3547 6 месяцев назад +1

    So I had knee Surgery in August of 2023. I was 25 years old and it was only my second surgery. (the first being tonsils at 5)
    I wear glasses on a normal basis so when I woke up I saw my mom hand my mom something and I asked "are those planet stickers?" Because they looked like Jupiter and Neptune. The reply I was given - "No, they are pictures the scope took of the inside of your knee." I pouted but since I had to eat/drink something I literally chose graham crackers and apple juice. I had a very childlike mindset afterwards. Then they wanted me to walk a bit and so the nurse "ok, you have to walk a bit. How about a walk to the bathroom?" I replied yes, in a drawn out way. Yeah anesthesia made my mind a bit younger for a few hours after waking up.

  • @notsureyou
    @notsureyou 6 месяцев назад

    "Thunderdong" 😂😂

  • @MorganChaos
    @MorganChaos 6 месяцев назад +1

    My wife and I are now in our mid thirties and married 3.5 years, but we were together on and off through our late teens/early-mid twenties. She got her wisdom teeth out during this period, and her mom was trying to make her drink some ginger ale so she wouldn't throw up. She wailed at the top of her lungs "DYLAN WOULDN'T MAKE ME DRINK GINGER AAAAAAAAAALE"
    (They did eventually get the ginger ale down her but her mom's plan was to call me and have me tell her to drink the ginger ale. We hadn't met or talked at that time, but she knew enough about me to know that I had my wife's best interests at heart and I would indeed make her drink the ginger ale, lmao.)

  • @PaleNoFace
    @PaleNoFace 7 месяцев назад

    Got my wisdom teeth removed a month ago. It wasn't general anesthesia, but I was pretty high on anxiety meds (all prescribed and highly encouraged due to previous dental trauma). I kept trying to eat my lower lip by the time we were done.

  • @DubYuhGChoppa
    @DubYuhGChoppa 9 месяцев назад

    15:16 it definitely is true that people say what they're hiding while under the influence. As an alcoholic in recovery i can promise you that.

  • @Justinanderson8654
    @Justinanderson8654 9 месяцев назад +2

    I was apparently insanely chatty when I got drugged. I was getting a butt sist cleaned so my dad [who was with me] told me I was saying the worst butt jokes imaginable, plus being high so I barely made sense. I was apparently put on some lighter stuff (pricing, I’m guessing?) so I was never completely out and chatted nonstop for the entire surgery.
    I was later put completely under for a penis surgery, but it took me a “unusually long time” to drug me to sleep, and my doctor said I was “very funny” so I’m guessing that round it was penis jokes.

  • @Fishtacofriday
    @Fishtacofriday Месяц назад +2

    My biggest issue what the idea that drunk people speak the truth is that this reasoning is often used to justify taking advantage of intoxicated people whether sexually or financially

  • @ENDER_Music
    @ENDER_Music 16 дней назад

    When I had to have surgery apparently I didn’t say much of anything, but a few days later I found an entire Mario Maker level on my DS that I don’t remember making.

  • @madisondean1074
    @madisondean1074 4 месяца назад

    It's literally past midnight in Michigan at the moment and I still live with my parents. As soon as I heard "Hitler has only got one ball", I died laughing. I literally had to use my blanket that I've had since I was 4 years old to stop me from laughing so loudly. I'm still laughing as I'm typing this.🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @christinaparks7339
    @christinaparks7339 7 месяцев назад +1

    i had broken my arm/wrist and was put under to set it, the break ended up need to be surgery to fix. but when i was coming out of it i kept asking why they chopped off my arm. I legit thought they amputated and stole my arm.

  • @Kyy-Sokia
    @Kyy-Sokia 9 месяцев назад +3

    I have bad teeth so have fillings in a lot. What’s odd is that the laughing gas makes it so I can only think/speak in French. I’m from Texas.

  • @iamahuman2813
    @iamahuman2813 9 месяцев назад +1

    I took Anastasia when I was- like- 10, well, laughing gas… when I woke up I asked if I could have my toy, then I said I couldn’t feel my mouth and bit my lip until it bled…

  • @Captain_Nightwing
    @Captain_Nightwing 4 месяца назад +1

    I had happy meds for before I got my wisdom teeth taken out. This is what I did, promptly took my flip flops off before hoping into the chair. And then when the nurse commented on my mom's necklace I told her it was cubic zirconia.
    After a surgery, I was still out of it. I asked what time it was. They asked me if I wanted my glasses to see I told them I don't want to see. I just wanted to know the time.
    When I had two teeth pulled the first thing I asked for was my flamingo poncho.

  • @SilverRagaire
    @SilverRagaire 8 месяцев назад +1

    15:00 I got to watch my mom have a procedure done under anesthetics when I was young.
    She was the DoN of the center and the Doctor was okay with it. Think acupuncture, but deeper and in the spine.
    My mom told me and her co-workers all about the time she went skydiving, the issue was, she’s never been skydiving and has never wanted to.

  • @ObviousPizza547
    @ObviousPizza547 9 месяцев назад +2

    I broke and significantly twisted my arm and was given morphine upon arrival to the hospital turns out I lost it completely and thought I was floating away like a balloon and I was terrified and my grandmother came up with the idea to lay over me and say don’t worry honey if you go anywhere I’ll be right with you and I calmed down nurses and mom got a laugh outta it and grandma was like what we’ll it worked 😂❤crazy family I’m a part of gotta love them all tho

    • @DrgnLdyLizzie2001
      @DrgnLdyLizzie2001 9 месяцев назад +2

      I remember being high on demorall after breaking my arm in 8th grade. I was laying down in the back seat of my dad's car and thought it would be awesome to blow a raspberry that sounded like the engine. My mom was laughing and saying, "Yup, she's out of it!" as I lay there, trying to both keep making the noise and explain why it was so important.

  • @meganerd741
    @meganerd741 3 месяца назад

    Ive only been under once and that was for my wisdom teeth. I hate iv and was crying my eyes out and after like 10 secs i was still not out (apparently i have a high tolerance to anesthesia) so second dose while i was still crying. Funny thing is i was completely with it when i woke up. I could walk and understand everything perfectly. Shocked my surgeon and nurses. Tho when my bf got his out he kept saying "i didn't want them fuzzy tomatoes" still make fun of him for that

  • @spiritedaway0tutu
    @spiritedaway0tutu 6 месяцев назад +1

    My sister woke up from anesthesia in tears, to the point we had to call my other sister to help calm her down. The reason for the tears? She was too old to go to Neverland with Peter Pan. *She was 22.*

  • @Samthemule2003
    @Samthemule2003 9 месяцев назад

    I've had the laughing gas and Lidocaine a few times. The first time it kinda kicked my ass. Every time after it just made me really loopy.

  • @mewtheenigma2732
    @mewtheenigma2732 9 месяцев назад +1

    2:06
    Oh that’s to the tune of the “Colonel Bogey March” lol
    Some people might recognize it as the whistling from the film “Bridge Over the River Kwai”
    The full bit is
    “Hitler… has only got, one, baaaaall.
    Goring, has two but ve-ry, smaaaaaall.
    Himmler’s… got something sim’lar…
    And old Joe Goebels… has no balls… at aaaaaaaall”

  • @kiwiskinsuwu6066
    @kiwiskinsuwu6066 7 месяцев назад +2

    I got surgery for a hernia when I was in kindergarten. Either the surgeon or the anesthesiologist let me play angry birds on his phone while the anesthesia kicked in and I remembered thinking something along the lines of “I’m taking too long I have to go to sleep now” right before conking out. I was promised a slushy when I woke up, which I was given, and promptly threw up, turning their nice white sheets red with regurgitated slushy. Good times.

  • @Akira_2x
    @Akira_2x 9 месяцев назад +1

    My dad had a colanocapy (probably botched that spelling) and after he said "I am having the biggest f*cking farts" I laughed so hard cuz he had an awesome tone! (In colanocapy they pump you with air so *FARTS*)

  • @violetlupus5676
    @violetlupus5676 7 месяцев назад

    After my first major surgery- and I was like 12 too- I spent almost an entire day under the remedial effects of the anastesia. I dont remember most of the day but Ill tell the one situation i do remember and the one my parents love to remind me.
    Number One :: I had the surgery at like... 4am? Somewhere before 6. The first genuine memory i have after coming out of surgery was at least a full twelve hours later, at somewhere between 6 and 7 PM. I was already awake and talking with my favorite uncle, who was the only one in the room at the moment. I assume my overprotective mother must have been out to check on her other kids, because i cant think of any other reason she would have left the room.
    Anyway, the conversation is muddied but I clearly remember that when he had to leave- to see his own kids- I tried to guilttrip him into staying and calling myself "his princess" which is a nickname i hadnt heard in many many years. Like, since i was a little kid, maybe even as a toddler.
    Needless to say, it didn't work.
    Number Two :: It was probably my first time waking up since getting out of surgery, but ive never been told the actual timeframe. Anyway, so Moms trying to hold a conversation with me about how Im feeling but i refuse to aknowledge her with tears in my eyes. She finally asks whats wrong and i snap at her "Why did you never tell me Im a SMURF?!"
    Iodine used in surgeries appear blue on the skin, and somehow i managed to have some all over my hands and upper chest. My surgery was on my back??
    Bonus 1 :: Not under anestesia anymore, but it was a few days after the surgery now. I was in the hospital recovering and aired my frustrations with my Mom about how i was angry that my grandparents on my fathers side never showed up or even texted me after such a major surgery. Like sure, they live out of state but this is a major surgery on their eldest grandchild and they just didnt CARE? Mom had to tell me they did show up for a few hours after my surgery, back when i was in the ICU coming down from the anestesia and i had even talked with them. I didnt believe her and had a genuine argument that she didnt need to defend them i shouldve known better. They DID show up though, and i felt bad i had accused them of not caring. To be fair though, i would expect that of them- to not show up. Theyre not the best people in the world. Not the worst, but they play favorites pretty heavily.

  • @dragonswirl3579
    @dragonswirl3579 8 месяцев назад +1

    When I came out of the anesthesia after getting my wisdom teeth removed, apparently I kept pushing the gauze out of my mouth with my tongue and laughing when the nurses had to put it back in, except then cried when I got frustrated because the gauze had to be in my mouth. On the way home (I actually remember this part) I was still pretty drugged up and I asked my mom if I could turn on the radio, and started humming along, and I saw my mom pull out her phone and point it at me, so I turned and said very aggressively "I'm not gonna say anything stupid MOM." And yeah we have that on video. When I got home my mom put me on the couch and I cried because she took my shoes off ??

  • @Raven62
    @Raven62 7 месяцев назад

    My mom went through so many surgeries and never had any of her nurses told me that she said anything funny. Though me on the other hand, when I had my wisdom teeth removed, my sister told me that I freaked out that shards of needle were running freely in my blood stream.

  • @Ketch0up_
    @Ketch0up_ 6 месяцев назад

    3:38 no because this is a genuine fear of mine 😭

  • @bird_b0nezz
    @bird_b0nezz 9 месяцев назад +3

    had my wisdom teeth removed and apparently was saying “why don’t have a penis?? where are my balls????? WHERE ARE THEY??” while sobbing, i’m a trans man and haven’t gotten any surgery, but apparently my brain was somehow convinced k was a cis man and they had somehow stolen my genitalia.

    • @darkdest6664
      @darkdest6664 9 месяцев назад

      those goddamn dentists stealing your genitals. so rude!

  • @victoriahewitt9938
    @victoriahewitt9938 8 месяцев назад +1

    I don't know what they gave my dad for his colonoscopy, but he kept trying to climb out of the moving car on the way home & shouted to everyone that he'd just had a colonoscopy & the drugs felt great! I guess a car of guys cheered at that, so I like to think that it might've given them the motivation to get checked out as well, even if for the wrong reasons. 😂

  • @labyrinthgirl17
    @labyrinthgirl17 7 месяцев назад +1

    My mom said two very funny things while on some heavy duty pain killers after surgery.
    1. In a stage whisper, "Don't go into the bathroom! Darth Vader is in there." She thought the paper towel dispenser looked like Darth Vader was peeking out of the bathroom, and she wasn't wrong.
    2. "Have they caught that chicken yet?" When I asked her what she was talking about, she gestured to the doorway to her hospital room. "There was a chicken running around the hall earlier. I hope they caught it."
    She also tried to hand out an invisible plate of cookies, but she thought she'd been dreaming and didn't realize she'd been acting out her 'dream' lol.
    I think the ones I can remember saying were also pretty funny.
    "If I had tears, I would cry." - Said after I had gotten the breast reduction surgery I'd needed for years and saw how I looked right afterwards.
    "Who put the floor here?" - After my bio sperm donor (not a father) pulled me out of the hospital bed to hurry me up and I couldn't feel anything below my knees, so I just fell onto my butt. The nurses told him to buzz off while they helped me off the floor and then assisted with dressing me. It was after getting my gallbladder taken out.
    "What pain?" - When I was asked how I would rate my pain after getting surgery to drain an abscess in my groin.
    I also woke up mid-procedure when I had a scope down my throat, as they were looking for ulcers in my stomach. Apparently, I made this horrific gurgling, growling noise, tried to bite down on the scope tube in my mouth (a very thick plastic guard stopped me from actually doing any damage), and I even tried to punch someone before they cranked up the anesthesia and I passed out again.

  • @Chewy59382
    @Chewy59382 9 месяцев назад

    They were looking at my lungs for my asthma the first thing I said was "oh hey mom when did you get here and where am I?"

  • @sophieandwayne
    @sophieandwayne 9 месяцев назад

    The song halter has only got one ball does have a melody to it!

  • @lovelysakurapetalsyt
    @lovelysakurapetalsyt 9 месяцев назад

    It's small, but I had to have a tonsillectomy when I was like 5 or so. I was so out if it that when I woke up, I felt cold and tried to pull my blanket up. I didn't have a blanket on. I tried to pull my IV out

  • @quasar42069
    @quasar42069 9 месяцев назад +2

    One time when I was waking up from anesthesia (i was young and impulsive and stupid), I tried to take off all my clothes and run out of the hospital. That was fun.