Accepting the absence is almost like grieving the loss of a loved one. Because you know that you have to put the relationship to rest. I had a rough time with the soul tie and rumination. It's been almost 8 months post discard, and I still have triggers when I hear certain songs. But when I do start to date again, I will pay attention to red flags that I ignored before.... one day at a time!
I can relate to this. I have felt this way. I have even believed in soulmates and the ruminations. When I was with my ex husband I stopped believing in all of that and I stopped believing in myself. And then post divorce and time I suddenly began to feel again. I suddenly began to believe again. It’s as if a switch had been turned back on. Suddenly certain songs no longer triggered me. I could feel them again with new eyes. I even found myself believing again in the one (soulmate if you will). I came to realize that I have had that one person who came into my life prior to my marriage. I will always believe that this man was the one. I gave my whole heart to him and he was the brightest light in my life. You can bet if given another chance with him it is on! But I digress; healing will take some time and patience. It doesn’t happen overnight but gradually you will be able to look back and realize just how far you’ve come.
Stay strong! I was with the narc for 13 yrs. Been no contact for over 3 yrs. Keep listening to Joe's video's along with others like Ben Taylor & Lee Hammond- 2 diagnosed narcs.
Healing from Narcissistic Abuse is really no joke ! Lots of PTSD, rumination, trauma bond ect. It’s like nothing else you will experience. SO much more challenging and painful than with a normal healthy person ❤
@@caligirl9403You'll soon feel empowered, and understanding that you miss the idea of what you thought they were due to the initial stage of the relationship instead of what they showed you through their actions later, helps. Year and a half here.
The narc is there to show us something about ourselves. Ive never thought of myself as a victim, just someone that wasn't aware of myself enough. It can be the most empowering experience, if its time ❤
The ending part of this video is spot on, once I started to heal and got away from the narc now over the past year I have been eliminating most of my friendships and family circle because I realized that I had attracted toxic people during my people pleasing. I made a vow to myself in 2019 to heal and now it’s 2024 and I can say I have 🎉🎉 the narc and all the others who were toxic don’t mess with me anymore, they don’t Hoover or anything because I know my worth and I don’t play about me! I only have a small circle of loving people but it was worth it from all the pain I went through healing my inner self
Yes throw away anything they bought you, or anything they left behind is trash. No memories of their ass, only thing you can’t remove is memories in your head but those will fade trust because you will get better and meet better quality people dating, making new friends etc. But do not communicate with them at all!
Give yourself time, I was the same but it will slowly change when you’re ready, we’re all different. Remember we’re not the same person, which is a good thing.
The SPACE between space and time. The complete END makes you feel as if you are standing still - stagnated - while everything around you moves. Your joy, your energy and hard fought for - well being... just-just still out of reach - but you know it is real, really in front of you - and you really - just want it back. And with this desire: You leave them behind.
Hello Joe, just came across your channel today, listened to a few of your videos. I've subscribed, I really like your clear explanation of how people with NPD see the world and interact with people. Your channel is educating me on building better boundaries and knowledge in general. I just want to say keep them coming!
You are so right about finally laying down of boundaries and realizing that others in your life also have to go. My ex husband realizes (I hope anyway) that he no longer has any power over me and never will again. Although I am quite sure that some of my family that I cut off in the last few years were shocked because it’s so out of character for me. The healing process has become a revelation of sorts and it has revealed a lot of truth about myself and the part I played as well as the intention of others. I am still guarded somewhat, but in the past few months I have even managed to surprise myself and have had glimpses of who I used to be (at least the good parts). It’s lit a fire within me that I thought had long burned out and I am not sure how or what to do with that? Perhaps just let it continue to grow and see where it leads?
Well done sweetie, embrace it and protect it going forward. It's a new you who cares far more about yourself. Don't allow people to rush you, stay grounded and aware of your new self-love ❤❤❤
💫 I had a tough time with the trauma bond and soul ties and the level of toxicity and drama and chaos and how all of it was making me feel and draining me. But with strong prayer and saying enough was enough and took my power and life back and I put in place my strong set boundaries and focused soley on me and my healing and being on my own peaceful journey, I was able to bounce back and come back stronger than ever. And all the ex narc hoover attempts don't phase me whatsoever. I get me a good lol😅 and keep it moving. Narcs can't stand to see any ex become stronger and healthy and happy and healed and completely get over them and move on with our life. And to no longer care about their existence and having PEACE in our life and being the one that finally gotten away and stayed away for good, oh that really makes the narc salty that he failed at completely destroying me. How dare i walk around happy and toxic and drama free and smiling and glowing and living my life. Poor little demon narc😂😂 Nola9Ward ⚜️⚜️💃🏽
Yup. He surfaced through his flying monkey. Thankfully flying monkey doesn't divulge much information. Maybe I should put it this way. He's trying to obtain a flying monkey.
We were fine before meeting this devil , we will be fine afterwards, life is going on and nothing they can do about it, they just keep playing their game of loser. Its always nice to see your new video !😊 Thank you Joe ! 🤗❤
Before I met the narc I was doing amazing in life, I was just a little lonely and open to dating after being single for 8 years (I had flings but nothing serious). I actually refused to date the narc in the beginning because I was scared of commitment and there were red flags immediately that made me feel uneasy about her. She pursued me relentlessly and would say "you can fk me but you can't date me??" And "there's other people that would love to date me, if you dont make up your mind I'm done with this".. which I was fine with I was seeing multiple other women behind her back before we started dating and I didn't want to give that lifestyle up. One day I woke up and like a ton of bricks I thought to myself "I'm head over heels in love with this woman" and I accepted her little Facebook relationship status thingy later that night. I guess her manipulation and extreme love bombing had finally worked. A year and a half later and 4 months post discard I've lost absolutely everything I had and I'm currently homeless. My transmission blew up on my car last week so now I'm walking and filing for welfare. My mental health and self confidence is at an all time low. I can't even believe just a few short months ago we were living together in the suburbs as a family, I had an amazing job I worked at for 10 years, clean criminal record and 2 vehicle's.. it's all gone and she's hunting for a new main supply living her best life. I can't blame anyone really but myself for allowing her inside my life but she definitely accomplished ruining my life.. I'm starting over from scratch but I still have a tiny sliver of hope I'll get my life back some day I guess.
Hey Joe, your friendly neighborhood narcissist survivor here:) Your content is great, and it would be great to reach more people. I watch another channel called Narcissist Chronicles. To reach a broader audience without creating a tonne of new content, they release their long form videos as usual, but then they also splice their long videos into several YT Shorts to reach even more people. It seems like it may be worth your while to do this as well, if you're looking for a non-labor intensive way to expand. Just thought I'd share in case it helps. Peace and love!
My ex narcissist had the nerve to think she was going to chase my girlfriend away after talking about me like a dog then begging her to leave and the crazy thing about it is my girlfriend doesn’t know her from a can of paint never met her she’s delusional to think we are paying her any attention
You are absolutely wrong, this is not the norm! Any time 2 abused empowered empaths find one another, they usually complete their journey in a harmonious relationship. It appears that you’re somewhat running out of a dialogue, now be honest about your significant other and your post narcissistic endeavors? relationship.
Accepting the absence is almost like grieving the loss of a loved one. Because you know that you have to put the relationship to rest. I had a rough time with the soul tie and rumination. It's been almost 8 months post discard, and I still have triggers when I hear certain songs. But when I do start to date again, I will pay attention to red flags that I ignored before.... one day at a time!
❤️❤️❤️
I can relate to this. I have felt this way. I have even believed in soulmates and the ruminations. When I was with my ex husband I stopped believing in all of that and I stopped believing in myself. And then post divorce and time I suddenly began to feel again. I suddenly began to believe again. It’s as if a switch had been turned back on. Suddenly certain songs no longer triggered me. I could feel them again with new eyes. I even found myself believing again in the one (soulmate if you will). I came to realize that I have had that one person who came into my life prior to my marriage. I will always believe that this man was the one. I gave my whole heart to him and he was the brightest light in my life. You can bet if given another chance with him it is on! But I digress; healing will take some time and patience. It doesn’t happen overnight but gradually you will be able to look back and realize just how far you’ve come.
Stay strong! I was with the narc for 13 yrs. Been no contact for over 3 yrs. Keep listening to Joe's video's along with others like Ben Taylor & Lee Hammond- 2 diagnosed narcs.
Did you get hoovered?
Out of all the "narcissist channels" on RUclips this is by far my favorite.
You might like mine. Joe was my influence to get it all out. 19 yrs and dumped.
Healing from Narcissistic Abuse is really no joke ! Lots of PTSD, rumination, trauma bond ect. It’s like nothing else you will experience. SO much more challenging and painful than with a normal healthy person ❤
@@caligirl9403
It certainly takes a while.
@@caligirl9403You'll soon feel empowered, and understanding that you miss the idea of what you thought they were due to the initial stage of the relationship instead of what they showed you through their actions later, helps. Year and a half here.
The narc is there to show us something about ourselves. Ive never thought of myself as a victim, just someone that wasn't aware of myself enough. It can be the most empowering experience, if its time ❤
The ending part of this video is spot on, once I started to heal and got away from the narc now over the past year I have been eliminating most of my friendships and family circle because I realized that I had attracted toxic people during my people pleasing. I made a vow to myself in 2019 to heal and now it’s 2024 and I can say I have 🎉🎉 the narc and all the others who were toxic don’t mess with me anymore, they don’t Hoover or anything because I know my worth and I don’t play about me! I only have a small circle of loving people but it was worth it from all the pain I went through healing my inner self
You want to break a trauma bond ?? Switch up ur routine and get rid of everything the narcissist gave you
Yes throw away anything they bought you, or anything they left behind is trash. No memories of their ass, only thing you can’t remove is memories in your head but those will fade trust because you will get better and meet better quality people dating, making new friends etc. But do not communicate with them at all!
I donated and trashed the rest. Felt good.
And sage your home.
I was the one who gave the narcissist a great Christmas gift and got nothing from him, even though he told me he had something for me….wow 🫤
It’s not getting over them. It’s getting over a time we’re we felt like we had no control over lives.
Hey Joe. I started my channel because of you. Its all shorts on my life of 19 yrs of marriage to a very vicious narcissistic woman. Thank you Joe.
Somebody always wants something. I stay solitary.
I don’t like being around people after my divorce. Self isolation is much easier for me.
No good, life is too short , your unhappiness makes narc happy
Give yourself time, I was the same but it will slowly change when you’re ready, we’re all different. Remember we’re not the same person, which is a good thing.
Perfectly fine, to recharge. Cause many people are takers.
Never said they were unhappy....I'm not @@lioubovgrant1935
Same
The SPACE between space and time.
The complete END makes you feel as if you are standing still - stagnated - while everything around you moves. Your joy, your energy and hard fought for - well being...
just-just still out of reach - but you know it is real, really in front of you - and you really - just want it back.
And with this desire: You leave them behind.
Absolutely true
You are a true comfort to the soul…Thankyou as always 🙏🏻❤️❤️
Hello Joe, just came across your channel today, listened to a few of your videos. I've subscribed, I really like your clear explanation of how people with NPD see the world and interact with people. Your channel is educating me on building better boundaries and knowledge in general. I just want to say keep them coming!
You are so right about finally laying down of boundaries and realizing that others in your life also have to go. My ex husband realizes (I hope anyway) that he no longer has any power over me and never will again. Although I am quite sure that some of my family that I cut off in the last few years were shocked because it’s so out of character for me. The healing process has become a revelation of sorts and it has revealed a lot of truth about myself and the part I played as well as the intention of others. I am still guarded somewhat, but in the past few months I have even managed to surprise myself and have had glimpses of who I used to be (at least the good parts). It’s lit a fire within me that I thought had long burned out and I am not sure how or what to do with that? Perhaps just let it continue to grow and see where it leads?
🙏💯❤
Well done sweetie, embrace it and protect it going forward. It's a new you who cares far more about yourself. Don't allow people to rush you, stay grounded and aware of your new self-love ❤❤❤
@@amandajohnson-williams7718 Thanks and that is the plan.
Hi Joe what you speak of definitely resonates, its a scary time so i decided just take it day by day 🙏💙
" ... and not everyone likes that. "
Ain't that the truth. The very hard truth in fact.
Peace to all of us.
💫 I had a tough time with the trauma bond and soul ties and the level of toxicity and drama and chaos and how all of it was making me feel and draining me. But with strong prayer and saying enough was enough and took my power and life back and I put in place my strong set boundaries and focused soley on me and my healing and being on my own peaceful journey, I was able to bounce back and come back stronger than ever. And all the ex narc hoover attempts don't phase me whatsoever. I get me a good lol😅 and keep it moving. Narcs can't stand to see any ex become stronger and healthy and happy and healed and completely get over them and move on with our life. And to no longer care about their existence and having PEACE in our life and being the one that finally gotten away and stayed away for good, oh that really makes the narc salty that he failed at completely destroying me. How dare i walk around happy and toxic and drama free and smiling and glowing and living my life. Poor little demon narc😂😂 Nola9Ward ⚜️⚜️💃🏽
💯 Beautifully said, Diva! And, so very true.😌💯♥️
Yup. He surfaced through his flying monkey. Thankfully flying monkey doesn't divulge much information. Maybe I should put it this way. He's trying to obtain a flying monkey.
We were fine before meeting this devil , we will be fine afterwards, life is going on and nothing they can do about it, they just keep playing their game of loser. Its always nice to see your new video !😊 Thank you Joe ! 🤗❤
Before I met the narc I was doing amazing in life, I was just a little lonely and open to dating after being single for 8 years (I had flings but nothing serious). I actually refused to date the narc in the beginning because I was scared of commitment and there were red flags immediately that made me feel uneasy about her. She pursued me relentlessly and would say "you can fk me but you can't date me??" And "there's other people that would love to date me, if you dont make up your mind I'm done with this".. which I was fine with I was seeing multiple other women behind her back before we started dating and I didn't want to give that lifestyle up. One day I woke up and like a ton of bricks I thought to myself "I'm head over heels in love with this woman" and I accepted her little Facebook relationship status thingy later that night. I guess her manipulation and extreme love bombing had finally worked. A year and a half later and 4 months post discard I've lost absolutely everything I had and I'm currently homeless. My transmission blew up on my car last week so now I'm walking and filing for welfare. My mental health and self confidence is at an all time low. I can't even believe just a few short months ago we were living together in the suburbs as a family, I had an amazing job I worked at for 10 years, clean criminal record and 2 vehicle's.. it's all gone and she's hunting for a new main supply living her best life. I can't blame anyone really but myself for allowing her inside my life but she definitely accomplished ruining my life.. I'm starting over from scratch but I still have a tiny sliver of hope I'll get my life back some day I guess.
It was very difficult 😕. He is asleep now, in death, and that makes it a little easier.
Wish i could warn the next victim
True but they wouldn’t listen especially if they were love bombed
Its like moving away from parents,or being born again.
Hey Joe, your friendly neighborhood narcissist survivor here:) Your content is great, and it would be great to reach more people. I watch another channel called Narcissist Chronicles. To reach a broader audience without creating a tonne of new content, they release their long form videos as usual, but then they also splice their long videos into several YT Shorts to reach even more people. It seems like it may be worth your while to do this as well, if you're looking for a non-labor intensive way to expand. Just thought I'd share in case it helps. Peace and love!
I started my channel because of his influence. I talk about my actual experiences of 19 yrs of marriage to a NARCISSIST.
My ex narcissist had the nerve to think she was going to chase my girlfriend away after talking about me like a dog then begging her to leave and the crazy thing about it is my girlfriend doesn’t know her from a can of paint never met her she’s delusional to think we are paying her any attention
How did you know? I've recently walked away from a friend too for trying to manipulate me.
Ty 🕊️✨🙏🪽🫶
✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽✊🏽
Who cares how they react?!!
You are absolutely wrong, this is not the norm! Any time 2 abused empowered empaths find one another, they usually complete their journey in a harmonious relationship. It appears that you’re somewhat running out of a dialogue, now be honest about your significant other and your post narcissistic endeavors? relationship.
Joe, thanks for being the human embodiment of a spirit guide. My life is calmer because of you.
🤍🕊️🤍🕊️🤍
I'm the same! Joe is amazing! ❤❤❤