Breaking up with friends and why that is ok | Hush Podcast
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- Опубликовано: 24 июл 2024
- Falling out of friendships can be awkward and heartbreaking for some. But according to experts, it’s only natural for acquaintances and even close friends to fall by the wayside as time goes on.
In this episode, Azura, Hazelle, and Germaine share with us why it is ok to drop out of friendships or let them fade out. They share how their ‘past’ friends shaped them and why cutting them off was their best decision at that time and it’s nothing to feel guilty about.
Timestamp:
0:00 Introduction
1:28 Have you broken up with a friend before?
7:54 Feeling lost/confused/guilty after a friendship breakup
11:04 Are we glad that our friendship breakups happened?
12:10 When is it okay to drop out of a friendship and is it normal?
16:30 What is “Friendscape”?
20:06 My friend ended our friendship after entering a relationship - A Story
23:30 How can we better manage breakups with friends?
24:36 Tips on how to deal with friendship breakups
26:23 What makes you happy in relation to your friendships?
30:11 Final thoughts, advice + conclusion
#friendship #friends #breakup #podcast #singapore #hushpodcast
Featuring:
Hazelle - / heyhihazelle
Germaine - / germaineleonora
Azura - / azuragoh
About Hush Podcast:
At Hush, hosts & Radio DJs Germaine Tan, Hazelle Teo, and Azura Goh, discuss relationships, health, and wellness topics that may be taboo or just plain paiseh to talk about.
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Something I needed to hear today. I recently had my clique run away from me on the last day of school because they didn’t want me in a group photo, God knows why. No hard feelings, I walked off with my head held high. This episode really gave me the reassurance and self-confidence to let go :’) Thank you x
Love this episode of the podcast. Such an unspoken topic and so many unspoken rules about friendships. And so glad that the elements of the unfriending a friendship are touched on.
Love the advice given especially for the "ghoster" and the "ghostee".
I get the part whereby Azura talked about the low maintenance of the friendship. The maintenance is not necessarily about the monetary terms but the pressure and the understanding your friends have for you in your current life and situations. Having the common understanding between you and your friends is important. If your friends have the kind of expectations that are not aligned with your current state of life, that it's time to break this friendship off.
Keep up the good work for such podcast episodes 💕♥️
really loved this podcast & the advice shared especially "no one can take care of yourself except yourself". having a similar experience of feeling that i'm being ghosted & deciding to break up for my mental health, i can see in hindsight that i was being overly invested in the friendship & we honestly didn't have much in common so it was not a great relationship. yeah it hurt like hell & as i heal, it still hurts from time to time but i see this period as one where i can mature and be better :)
Thanks for sharing Naomi! Breakups of any kind really do hurt but all that matters is that we learn and grow from it! Glad you saw that for yourself and did what's best for you! 🥰
this topic was the most relatable . .
Such a great episode. Learnt so much. Love your videos❤️
@itsclarityco
I really respect it that the guest shares their personal stories and experiences
To help progress this conversation into a more positive pov
【Thank you so much to everyone in the team behind this lovely video!!】
*You all did a fantastic job*
I got dumped silently by two friend groups, after secondary school and after jc, both did not tell me what I did wrong and did not want to speak to me at all. Nothing big happened and I just wish I knew what happened cos the hurt still lives with me till today. Both groups were also extremely close with me until the day they started ghosting me so there were no hints at all. I wonder what would’ve happened if we stayed friends but they are still close with each other and I guess I wish them all the best! 😂
Oh man, we're sorry to hear about your story. I hope you have found friends who are supportive and have better ways of communicating with you! Sending hugs your way, Cassandra! 💕
Don't put it too harsh to urself. They did not dump you. They might just have chosen to distance away so suit them. U r definitely not alone. I think frens made in school just for academic purpose it's not going to last. I was in this clique in my sec sch tat i was so proud of and really love the memories together. A good mix of 帅哥美女 legitly. Squeezing and taking turns to eat within 1 table of at least 10 ppl? Playing during break sometimes n all. They are just a bunch of fun frens tat i rlly enjoyed. But i always feel so small with them as there are brighter shiner stars within the group or in most group. Every grp has a leader right? I am ok not being the leader and have always been a follower. I have always being grateful to be with them until one day i realise they are meeting up without me. Mayb for once only i could close one eyes thinking after its ok. But when it happens again the hurt starts. I question myself why, i even tried to be open in asking. N the most direct fren in the grp mention we are just not in the same frequency. Im like ok. But i was crying within. It's hinting me to stop trying becuz if it doesnt match it just doesnt? They are a very high mainteance friends honestly that i felt alittle over controlled. Having to buy $50 gifts to every girl's bday, eat good food each bday. Although it is deserving for each of them but its really painful for the wallet. I have no idea how can they be so comfortably afford while i had to work my ass with pt jobs, keeping away from other high mainteance grp of frens just to be ok with gng as the flow. Overtime as we get older, gng to diff poly and uni, the chat just got more and more dead. It got harder n harder to fix a date to meet all tgt once again. N i have decided to stop trying since i felt tired to be always the one suggesting should we meetup sometime soon? I do know there is diff a seperate chat w/o me but how many memebers tat im not too sure and not interested to know. I guess it's just normal to have small cliques within big cliques. And i just gave up looking for big cliques to hang out with after sec sch. Of course if it comes it comes. I did unknowingly got into to a big clique in uni through one of the member. I do rlly want to thank all of them for being part of my study journey w me. I dont think i could grad w/o them. As much i would like us to reunite and just have fun again once again, a smaller grp within went out seperately and posted on socials once again. I wont say that i got dumped. I would just take it that they did not have interest in taking me as their true fren. Or mayb i wasnt gd enough to be with them and it's just time for me to stop trying too hard and prob just work on myself. Go as the flow. Keep ppl who feels the same. That they would like to keep u in their lifes too. Let ppl live their lifes. Once you build a better self, frens that r suppose to be ur fren will come bck to you. If they didn't, forget about it. They r just not mend to be your fren for life than. In every journey in your life you will def meet new ppl. So don't be worried that you will not have frens. But you might not have frens if you choose to close urself up. We take charge of our lifes. Don't let others belittle us. We are better than we think we are. I would like to say that breaking away help me breath better after though having to go through a heart broken phrase. But without these phases i think i won't be myself today. I am quite proud to say tat i feel ppl who use to get outcasted will tend to shine brighter with a brighter future. I feel i have achieved better than most of ppl of my age but it will only happen if we work on ourselves. Build the confidence and unique personality within. The past of being outcasted might have given a strong hidden strength to work even harder and archieve more to prove them wrong that it's their lost to not have chosen to keep me around them. I will still be happy to help anyone of them, if they choose to come to me. As long as i felt they have contributed to where i am today. Any positivity that they have brought in my life is enough for me to forget the negativity that got to me in the past. Unless the negativity receieved was just planned/targetted and mean to be in my face. Without a truthful sry, i would happily not want to be near such a person ever again. I believe you did not do any wrong all in all. We mighy just be too different and harder to accept esp when we are younger. So stay strong, by building urself does help in healing past wounds. Sometimes i feel our parental control might have played apart. As i was the only one in the grp, receiving call from my parents, reminding me to be home early. my frens they do also recieve calls frm my mum when i didnt pick up my phone. I do feel the pressure being my fren having to stress over getting calls and addressing to a parent. I would like to assume that it might be one of the cause for sec sch clique issues. While the uni clique issue was prob caused by me not managing the situation better since i try to bring in someone that did not click well with the leader of the clique. Just accepting that we are not born to please everyone helps me to move on. So can you! You will definitely find someone tat is more deserving to be with you!(;
If a supposed friend bring out the worse in you, will drag you into various troubles, make feel you are the one chasing after them, simply there just because they benefit from you when you are experiencing good times in your life; then might as well start slowly distancing yourself with them
When people does typical societal norms like at least getting a job and start a family, obligations naturally changes as people feels they no longer have time to seriously invest on the idea of forming strong bond on new people they meet for them to be called "legit" friends just for the sake of increasing their social circle. Even if you belong in a career environment that involves constantly interacting people like various forms of customers service, marketing and PR, there is an lingering idea of you are interacting with them because you have to get something out of them in and them vice versa from you; be it exchanging of ideas, information or financial.