LIVING IN A GERMAN VILLAGE AS A NEW ZEALANDER | What it's really like

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  • Опубликовано: 15 окт 2024

Комментарии • 198

  • @alexanderschiller7720
    @alexanderschiller7720 5 лет назад +284

    Don‘t think this behaviour of the villagers was due to being a New Zealander. In these small villages you‘re considered a stranger if you‘re coming from the neighbour village.

    • @derriegel5705
      @derriegel5705 5 лет назад +14

      So true :D

    • @S_Black
      @S_Black 5 лет назад +15

      Or just if you haven't been born there. Though living there for a few decades (or just years) can overcome that :p
      Building a house can also change people's perception as it shows that you're staying for the long run

    • @windhelmguard5295
      @windhelmguard5295 5 лет назад +31

      the main reason why villagers don't like new people, especially city folk, is that villages have this delicate balance where everybody just kind of lets the others do what they want within reason and when you are the new person, it's difficult for them to quantify how you are going to react to that environment. are you going to roll with it or are you the kind of person who'll call the cops over a neighbour washing his car on a non sealed surface, or a dog not being on a leash? basically a new person could always turn out to be a massive threat to the lifestyle they enjoy.
      they'll generally be very welcoming once they figure out that you're cool though.

    • @Baccatube79
      @Baccatube79 5 лет назад +16

      Villagers are a species of their own. Make sure to buy at the local butcher's and bakery, keep quiet on sundays and the garden tidy - you'll be ok.

    • @wtsalive8210
      @wtsalive8210 5 лет назад +10

      Also helpful is to be a member of local groups like choirs, "Gartenbauverein", firefighters and so on

  • @derriegel5705
    @derriegel5705 5 лет назад +99

    When people in traditionel villages are unfriendly to you: I don't think it's about you guys beeing from other countries, it is more like that you moved to their village as an "outsider". I am german and i moved to a bavarian village near Regensburg in 2008 and i had quite the same experience.

    • @janethockey9070
      @janethockey9070 5 лет назад +3

      corni wo Bavarians aren't the friendly people in Germany

  • @maoaflo
    @maoaflo 5 лет назад +34

    hi Antoinette! i m from nothern germany and i live in frankonia since the 90 s. even half of my family is frankonian, but it took me a long time to get accepted. mostly because i speak high german and everybody knows i m not from bavaria. it can be hard, even if you are german. all the best to you and your family!

  • @dominikinimod
    @dominikinimod 5 лет назад +69

    One way of getting accepted in a small village is by participating in local events, e. g. soccer games, village party or Kirchweih. Have a beer or vine with locals lets you get in contact. At first they are afraid that their close community gets broken by foreigners who don't care about the community.
    I live about 30 minutes from Würzburg on the other side in an even smaller village than you and we had a family from the US for several years in our village. People loved them after they got to know them. Even though they were black which is very uncommon and somethng special in villages of this area they became a part of the community as they attended local events and were open to the village and their inhabitants.

    • @murmelstein6049
      @murmelstein6049 5 лет назад +6

      Yes, that is true. Or join a Verein, for example the Freiwillige Feuerwehr or the Schützen- or Stockschützenverein.

    • @Maikind215
      @Maikind215 5 лет назад +5

      So true! My parents always speak so highly of people that move to our village and participate in village events! Showing presence is so important!

    • @Miwosanur423
      @Miwosanur423 5 лет назад +5

      Thats how we germans tick. Yes. Drink a beer or wine with us, join community events, reference opinions of others to promote the place you live in, appreciate local culture, mind to be a bit reserved and let others speak more than yourself, make an event of something to attract attention if it gets too boring (overcome daily boring events) and receive attention and friendship. Grow friendship day by day. Not easy, but may help you in bad times (Vitamine B). A true friendship may last until the day you die.

    • @teachersusanute199
      @teachersusanute199 5 лет назад +1

      Rick Evans it helps to have small children. Through Kindergarten and school activities you get to know locals 😁

  • @nicolekishkin2152
    @nicolekishkin2152 5 лет назад +26

    Hello! I came from Haley Alexis's channel and I love your style. You seem like such a nice and genuine person! I am planning to study in Germany next year and your lifestyle is exactly what I'd like to have one day. The quiet small town life. Thank you for sharing your experiences. :)

  • @heinrichwohlgemuth3863
    @heinrichwohlgemuth3863 5 лет назад +3

    Dear Antoinette, you are such a lovely person and your German is simply fantastic (I saw that video where you speak German, and as I am German, I do not "beat around the bush". Your German is simply excellent and really great.) I have subscribed to your channel, of course. When I found out that you live in the same wine region of Lower Franconia where I live, too, I was even more impressed with your excellent attitude, your friendly and welcoming way of telling your experiences. I apologize for those German fellow countrymen who did not give you a smile, or who were grumpy when you moved from Wurzburg to that little village. Of course, I will not mention the name of your village. I will definitively respect your privacy from the bottom of my heart. I just wanted to express that you "gained the hearts" here in Germany with your video channel and your stories. You are really an INSPIRING personality. I loved all your comments and comparisons how Germans are and what is different compared to New Zealand. Me and my spouse LOVE your videos. Give your husband a "big hug" from a German family, and also a hug to your 2 lovely kids, from a German family who lives not even 15 kilometers from you. We also live in a "little village", but our heart is with you and we are multilingual and open-hearted. Just remember, there are many, many Germans who would never be "grumpy" to you, and we apologize for every bad experience that you might have had with our countrymen. WE LOVE YOU. German hugs.

  • @claudiaduffy5500
    @claudiaduffy5500 5 лет назад +25

    I reckon it's the same all over the world Antoinette. Small villages are tight-knit. But perseverance pays off and being open and friendly yourself helps of course. All the best for the new year!!

    • @AntoinetteEmily
      @AntoinetteEmily  5 лет назад +2

      Yes I think you’re right Claudia. All the best for the new year too. Lots of love to you and your family.

  • @typxxilps
    @typxxilps 5 лет назад +20

    Foreigner and Foreigner doesn't mean that you have to come from abroad. Abroad can mean for a real villager 5 -15 km - a Würzburger is for them a guy from abroad - the other side of the river.

  • @teachersusanute199
    @teachersusanute199 5 лет назад +16

    Exact the same happened to me when I moved to a village in the Black Forest 🤣🤣and I am German🤣

    • @tuoni12
      @tuoni12 5 лет назад +2

      gleiche Erfahrung! So ist ihre Kultur, sie
      haben Angst vor Fremden, weil ihre Welt sehr klein ist.

    • @rosmarinlavendel1477
      @rosmarinlavendel1477 5 лет назад +3

      Teacher Susan dörfer sind ein komplexes ökosystem das ist kein fremdenhass sondern ein soziales ökosystem.🤷🏼‍♀️

  • @saralampret9694
    @saralampret9694 5 лет назад +3

    You look like such a sweet person, even the words you use, i think you're such a happy person, only positive energy, don't change :))) It is lovely to listen to you

  • @jenniferjager6259
    @jenniferjager6259 5 лет назад +18

    This happened to me either, even I'm German. I moved from Hessen, close to Frankfurt, to franconia, near Coburg and the people there looked at me like I'm an alien 😂😂😂😂 they talked really bad about me behind my back. That I'm arrogant because I'm from a big city and so on. I quite enjoyed it to proof them wrong. At the end I call this little place my home and I'm devastated that I had to move back to the big city I came from. 😔

    • @einarvolsung2202
      @einarvolsung2202 5 лет назад +3

      Perhaps they prefer muslims

    • @boahkeinbockmehr
      @boahkeinbockmehr 5 лет назад +2

      @@einarvolsung2202 bahaha you have never been to the german countryside, have you? My high school wouldn't even accept muslim students. Everything, at least in the west, is run by the catholic church. One of the first muslim students refused to go to church and the morning prayer, when he was forced to partake his dad came in the next morning and broke the crucifix on the wall of the classroom. that was the first and last time a muslim was permitted to attend my school. It's always funny when people think that german city and rural life are even somewhat close. Best were the turks that wanted to be "gangstas". Growing up, turks always had a reputation of being rather dishonourable in these parts and to never settle things like men 1 on 1, but to always show up with 20 cousins and brothers and form a "turkish circle" around their victim. Some with relatives in a nearby city tried this once here and received the beating of their lifetime aswell as being banned by the local "bachelors club" (= every unmarried local man) from showing themselves at local festivities for the rest of their lifes. Rural communities have their own laws, institutions and executive, believe me no matter where you come from, saxony or anatolia, if your family wasn't born in this town, you better make sure to keep low profile.

    • @chrisb3189
      @chrisb3189 Год назад

      @@boahkeinbockmehr Wie ist es wenn ich als Großstädler auf's Land ziehe?

  • @swanpride
    @swanpride 5 лет назад +2

    Oh, small villages are always like this. They are very close knit communities and see you as a foreigner even if you are coming from the next big city originally. Ideally you find someone who introduces you into the community, so to speak, giving you a stamp of approval, but otherwise, the best way is to participate in local events. The church is often the big contact centre, sometimes it is some sort of club. Become part of the club, show that you care about the community, and they will embrace you eventually - in German speed, naturally.

  • @alanbarr9327
    @alanbarr9327 5 лет назад +2

    I know, how you must have felt at first in Franconia. I came to Central Franconia in 1974. To a little town called Wassertrüdingen. That´s near Ansbach. It took a long time for the folks to thaw a bit, although my mom was born there. But, once they´ve accepted you, you have friends for life!

  • @yelenayeli9529
    @yelenayeli9529 5 лет назад +4

    I don’t live in Germany but I like to go on vacation in Germany. I am Dutch and I speak a bit German. Most of the people we met were very friendly. I think it might be easier as a Dutch because we are so much alike.

  • @modelleicher
    @modelleicher 4 года назад +1

    In German rural life there is just one true home village and thats the one you were born in. Doesn't matter how long you've lived there, doesn't matter if you're from the next village over or all the way across the globe, you'll always be "zugezogene"

  • @DanicaChristin
    @DanicaChristin 5 лет назад +2

    I know what you mean. My family and I lived in the same German village for 10 years and it took ages became part of the community. But the village where you live looks so so cute, I love it

  • @carola-lifeinparis
    @carola-lifeinparis 5 лет назад +9

    That happens to Germans as well :) Love the Pullover you are wearing. Have a good start into the new year

  • @notthatyouasked6656
    @notthatyouasked6656 5 лет назад +1

    The US state of Maine is kind of like this about "outsiders" too. There's a Maine-based comedian who talks about a neighbor who says he's lived in Maine his whole life. "That's not true", said the comedian, "I happen to know he was born in New Hampshire and he didn't move to Maine until he was three days old!"

  • @8x57ishoghunter7
    @8x57ishoghunter7 5 лет назад +7

    That is is absolut normal in smal villages. It also would happens to a German family. It gets better if you join a club (Verein) maybe your son likes to play football. Greetings from msp

  • @fionamenzel1266
    @fionamenzel1266 4 года назад

    I just discovered your channel today and was super interested since I also spend some time in nz a few years ago. I have already watched what feels like all of your videos in one go just now. But in this one I suddenly realized that we are actually neighbors! I just think its amazing how small the world sometimes is :)
    the wine hotel that holds the wine festival each year is one of my favorite breakfast places around!

  • @wudruffwildcard252
    @wudruffwildcard252 5 лет назад +1

    I love the music and intro to your video logs, very unique and enjoyable!

  • @gerdipediaTV
    @gerdipediaTV 5 лет назад +2

    That's pretty normal in small villages. Outsiders are very difficult to get into the community. That was the same with my father and he came from a neighboring village 3 km away. But no matter your village where you live has always been one of the most beautiful in the area. In general, just the area between my home Rothenburg ob der Tauber and Würzburg is one of the most beautiful in Germany.

  • @mommy2kdk
    @mommy2kdk 5 лет назад +4

    Makes me think of small towns here in the US. Lol
    You live in a gorgeous area of Germany! I loved visiting down in that area when I lived in Germany.💜

  • @traceywatson2092
    @traceywatson2092 5 лет назад +1

    Hi! I’ve just found your channel. As an American, we lived in Germany for 6 years while my husband served in the military. We wanted to experience Germany, so we chose not to live on the military base. The Germans we lived by were very used to Americans coming and going, so they tolerated us. I played clarinet in school and through college, and I gathered up the courage to ask if I could play with the village band. After I joined, I became like family! It was such a wonderful experience. I am normally very shy, but it was worthwhile to put myself out there.

  • @interlene
    @interlene 5 лет назад +1

    I was an au-pair in Wuerzburg 20 years ago, best time in my life, was obsessed with German culture, but ended up living in Dublin, totally the opposite :-( But sure, the chances I had to grow here as a person would have never got somewhere else I think, so happy days :-)))

  • @Kellydoesherthing
    @Kellydoesherthing 5 лет назад +3

    Loved this video :) I think you’re completely right - my experience would’ve been totally different if I had lived in a German village vs a city like Mainz (about 200k population). It was nice to hear what your experience was like and congrats on the future new house!!

    • @AntoinetteEmily
      @AntoinetteEmily  5 лет назад +2

      Thanks Kelly! Yes village life is a totally different German experience 😂 I love hearing about your experiences! I would really like to visit Mainz sometime, I hear it’s a fab city.

    • @Kellydoesherthing
      @Kellydoesherthing 5 лет назад

      Antoinette Emily I for sure loved living there :) I hope you get to see it someday and if you do, try to allot some time to go to nearby rudesheim :) you will love it especially given how much you appreciate the vineyards where you are

    • @LythaWausW
      @LythaWausW 5 лет назад +1

      Kelly, again, you're right on. I live in a tiny village and wow it's hard. I think Antoinette has the advantage of having adorable children and their charms worked on the locals. And Antoinette's diplomacy helped, I'm sure.

    • @Kellydoesherthing
      @Kellydoesherthing 5 лет назад

      LythaWausW adorable children always soften situations :)

  • @schlafesbruder7625
    @schlafesbruder7625 5 лет назад +4

    German villagers are indeed somewhat special. You will forever be a Zugereister - sometimes even as the 2nd Generation. There is no way to become a local without beeing born there.
    In many cases they even speak a special dialect which is slightly different than the dialect of the next village. Do you understand them? (As soon as you do you will be as accepted as a Zugereister can be :-)

  • @wtsalive8210
    @wtsalive8210 5 лет назад +15

    So cute persons like you are always so welcome here in Germany!
    I wish you a good slide in the new year 2019. Have much fun at your Silvestre party. Cya next year

  • @peterdoe2617
    @peterdoe2617 5 лет назад +2

    Down below, Claudia Duffy maybe mentioned it: this might be similar all around the world. What I found interessting was, how your closest
    neighbours instantly welcomed you. How it was just others, who kept their distance for so long. I think that will also happen everywhere.
    Have a wonderful 2019 and best of luck with your new home!

  • @uliwehner
    @uliwehner 4 года назад +1

    @antoinette emily, since you live so close to some of my relatives you should go see them. They run a family owned restaurant in Lindelbach. the "Linde". They grow their own wine, too, have for generations. I think you will like Lindelbach.

  • @shaclo1512
    @shaclo1512 5 лет назад +5

    yea Würzburg is very expensive, I‘m also looking for a new appartment there, but It starts from 800 Euro for 2 Rooms and 1200 Euro for 4 Room appartments.

  • @windhelmguard5295
    @windhelmguard5295 5 лет назад +8

    german villages have their own rules and customs which are unwritten, but generally agreed upon and whenever someone new moves in, it's difficult to determine wether that new person is willing to play by those rules and behave themselfs or if that person is some sort of hobby lawyer who'll defend their rights to the bitter end even when they are the one who's being a dick.
    for example while german law generally doesn't allow certain thing to be done in certain ways, when you do have a good relationship with all the other people living in your village you can get away with bending the rules and villagers in germany aprreciate that.
    problem is that it's not uncommon for new people moving in to set off that delicate balance and start calling the cops over loud music, dogs not being on a leash or something like that.
    another thing is that villagers in germany have agreements with their neighbours that last for generations and it's uncommon for new people to honor those agreeements, for example it could have happened decades ago that a previous owner built a driveway to your property that crosses your enighbours property and that was ok because they where cool with one another, now it is very well possible that someone new moving in is not going to honor or even know about such an agreement and that is terrible, which is why german villageers oftehn don't apreciate new people moving in, especially city folk.

  • @rickycoker5830
    @rickycoker5830 5 лет назад +1

    I subscribed because like you I trust my instincts. You seem like a genuinely nice person and I look forward to seeing what life brings to you and your family. Best wishes from the US young lady.

  • @SomewhereInIndiana1816
    @SomewhereInIndiana1816 3 года назад

    Both the video and the comments (especially from Germans living in small villages) were really interesting. Thanks!

  • @TheMarvelli
    @TheMarvelli 5 лет назад +3

    Hi, I just came across your channel not knowing, we're almost neighbors. You are absolutely right about the reluctance of people here in accepting foreigners. I think it has something to do with this village having town walls that separate the "us" from "them". We live outside these walls next to Ochsenfurt and I know, what you're talking about. You don't need to be an expat for that kind of experience. 😉 I like the way, you see Germany and especially our region. A warm welcome to you. Hope to see you out there and have a glass of wine. Or some icecream at Salva's. (he's open on Xmas eve)

    • @AntoinetteEmily
      @AntoinetteEmily  5 лет назад +1

      Thank you so much for your lovely message. We will actually be moving soon to Ochsenfurt which I am very excited about. Please come and say hi if you see me around 😊

    • @TheMarvelli
      @TheMarvelli 5 лет назад

      @@AntoinetteEmily Will do. We are quite often sitting at Voit during lunch time and my wife runs the Goldgemäuer appartment hotel in the Obere Klingengasse. This is so funny, because when I saw your first video, I had no idea, where about in Germany you live. It's been quite a surprise to find out. 😄

    • @AntoinetteEmily
      @AntoinetteEmily  5 лет назад

      @@TheMarvelli It's a very small world!

  • @boahkeinbockmehr
    @boahkeinbockmehr 5 лет назад +1

    Coming from such a small countryside town with a similar tight knit community the issue is about every foreigner, not only people from other countries, but also those from other regions of germany (so the ones unable to understand our dialect, with different customs, mentality etc.), or to some extent even those just from a neighbouring village. We refer to them all as "Zujezoochene" (Zugezogene ~ people that migrated into our town) or as a derogatory "zujezoochenes pack". We don't mind them as long as they keep to themselves and stay away from our way of dealing with things. keep in mind that many of these communities predate a german state by centuries if not even millennia, so we have our own language (dialect), customs and also (nowadays inofficial) laws and institutions. If you abide by them there is no problem, but if you do not, you will get shunned and made to want to move. However it is easier if you have small children, as them growing up with the regional kids will get them, and by extension you, introduced and included into local affairs - though the kids and parents will always stay the zujezoochene and find an inner core that they will never be allowed to enter. I highly recommend joining a local club, preferably one working for the public good (e.g. most local men here are voluntary firefighters), as they play a huge role in creating and managing local social life.

  • @Norkans5
    @Norkans5 5 лет назад +1

    I lived in a small village since i was born. But since most of my friends are either in other villages or in Würzburg, i am not very active in my village. This has lead to some people not recognizing that i am a local and staring at me. It is only when they talk to me, that they realize that i am a local.

  • @Florinepn
    @Florinepn 5 лет назад +6

    I know exactly how you felt when the villagers were not friendly to you. Sometimes that happens to me, the villagers greet my husband and if I say Hallo, silence. I was reading through the comments and one person mentioned to get involved in the village activities I think I will do that for sure! Thanks for a great video! Happy New Year! Hugs! 😊

    • @AntoinetteEmily
      @AntoinetteEmily  5 лет назад +2

      It might take some time but once the locals get to know you they will love you cause you’re a lovely person 💗

    • @Florinepn
      @Florinepn 5 лет назад

      @@AntoinetteEmily Thanks so much for your kind words. 💜💜💜

  • @L00pTroop
    @L00pTroop 5 лет назад +5

    It is a typical behavior on German villages no matters where you are. I think it is a thing based on our history which is a very dark one and I not even mean only WWII, WWI and the time before was also lead by poverty, often hunger etc. My grandparents which where both born before WWI and my parents, uncles and aunts which were born during WWII or few years later have also learned to do not trust foreigners, because in that time, most of unknown people were passing through the farms to raid some food or anything else. It was a really poor time were most people do not have enough to eat. Today it is of course not the case, but the awareness of what was learned by parents still is in the behavior or character of the people, especially if they life in a small village since generations.
    I was grown up in a small village in southern Germany as well and my basic idea of German people is really biased by my parents (ofc) and other people in this village. My thoughts about German people is that they are really unfriendly and reserved to foreigners. Although I'm far different because I don't understand this behavior at all, I caught myself sometimes in getting this impressions of people too. Maybe just depending on a bad mood or anything else.
    So, no worries, even the most hidden villages in Germany will getting used of some changes and new persons, but it could take a while :-)

  • @throughoutthevioleteye5267
    @throughoutthevioleteye5267 5 лет назад

    Hi Antoinette! I'm Mexican and I also live close to Wü, in the Main Spessart region. I just stumbled into your channel recently and I love it. I send you a big hug

    • @AntoinetteEmily
      @AntoinetteEmily  5 лет назад +1

      Thanks for your lovely message. Please come up and say hi if you see me around 💗

  • @sykotikmommy
    @sykotikmommy 5 лет назад +2

    Wurzburg is so beautiful. I can't wait to be back over there in that general area! 😁

  • @dagmarking3974
    @dagmarking3974 5 лет назад +1

    Thank you for sharing. I enjoy your channel. I believe that your experience would be true just about anywhere, even a lot of small towns or villages here in America are that way. Your personality is so wonderful and warm that I'm sure people warm up to you quickly. God bless you and once again thank you for sharing.

    • @AntoinetteEmily
      @AntoinetteEmily  5 лет назад

      Thank you so much for your sweet message it made me smile.

  • @lemasch01
    @lemasch01 5 лет назад +2

    „Blood out of a stone“! 🤣 oh yes, you got it. I respect you for your patience. I don’t have it, even though I am German. I grew up in Berlin far away from my relatives in a village near to the Netherlands and when I was so happy to meet some, they told me: „you’re not our cousin!“ At first I thought it’s just a few but I soon realized they’re all thinking that way which is why I consider my whole family as dead/non-existend. So I respect you a lot. 👍 happy Easter!🐰🐣🐇

    • @feliciacoffey6832
      @feliciacoffey6832 2 года назад +1

      So sorry that happened to you. You don't deserve that. It's their loss if they don't welcome you as family.

  • @AnnetteWarren
    @AnnetteWarren 4 года назад +1

    I have wondered how you feel in a small Bavarian village as a foreigner... I wasn’t born in Germany but I have spent most of my life in Frankfurt. To me even Munich is tight- knit and clique 😂

  • @claudiaf.2236
    @claudiaf.2236 5 лет назад +1

    I like your new haircut! Very fresh and nice!
    I am so sad for you that people where so grumpy: but you got throw this hard time and it might have made you stronger!

  • @Toni-or7dk
    @Toni-or7dk 5 лет назад

    Good morning Antoinette!
    My last video of yours was the one concerning educional issues and the impression of an fairly open minded way of raising.
    It's quite interesting to watch at the differences. On the one hand the education appears to be modern and uncontaminaded by any prejudices.
    On the other site it's as you mentioned quite an effort to get into this little village community as a member and someone who belongs to the place.
    I suppose very much the second point is not of that great difference to other countries in the world. In little villages it is casual everybody knows everyone and therefore newcomers are just easily recognized. In a city where you find yourself much more in an anonymous situation and people from other regions are everyday appearances it's just not that obvious to recognize foreigners.
    That might be a reason and more ore less a sitation you would probably find in other countries as well.
    What do you think?
    Happy easter and a nice weekend,
    Toni

  • @lydiaveldhuizen3157
    @lydiaveldhuizen3157 5 лет назад +4

    I am Dutch and moved in a village in Niedersachsen. My expierence is that they are not so welcomming, in fact they always turned there back on me When they where in conversation with somebody els from the village, or they quickly went n there houses. My neighbours next to me in the ten years I have lived there where only saying hello when they saw me, and then they hat a Good day. Because mostly they turned there hat away. I have tried manny times to open a conversation, But the results where that the next time nothing hat changed.
    There was only one familie who invited us to the so called traditions festen. Then I saw my next door neigbours again and by all that people she was very kind and open. When hat a nice conversation, so I think Oké something has changed. No way, the next time that she saw me on my own she turned her hat away and walked by. How will you call such a behavior. This is a Soft story about my expierences. You can go and buy by the locals, and we renovated our house and I can tell you story,s you would not like to here them.
    And second....they only talk to you If they needed something. Its n discusthing behaviour. And she was not the only one. A few I hat a so called normal contact with.

    • @boahkeinbockmehr
      @boahkeinbockmehr 5 лет назад +1

      Did you try joining a local club? Did you attend social events and make an effort in helping to set them up? Germans usually don't actively seek friendships but stay at a "polite distance" in everyday life. This also explains the difference behaviour you witnessed in your neighbour between meeting her at a social event and meeting her in everyday life.

    • @connies8901
      @connies8901 5 лет назад +1

      Exactly how german people in villages are!!!

  • @carolynek1875
    @carolynek1875 2 года назад

    Sounds like you found yourself a Little piece of heaven.. God's blessings to you and your family

  • @wolfberlin
    @wolfberlin 5 лет назад +1

    thanks for sharing your experience. As others have observed before small places with little exchange with the outer world tend to be “reserved” when new faces enter their lives. This is considered “normal”, i.e. for a small place, and has nothing to do with you and your folks personally. Usually it helps when you have kids (or a dog for that matter) and probably the presence of your kids did accelerate the process of transforming aliens back into people. Enjoy your time at such a scenic place, things will work out for you: at the end incessant friendliness is going to overcome reservations!

  • @furzkram
    @furzkram 5 лет назад

    Nice recap. Thank you for it.
    I'm really happy that you're happy here. I think you got the best way of living here - some need the "Großstadtrummel" as we call it, but the village / countryside near a somewhat bigger city gives definitely the best way of living here.

  • @newbeginnings8566
    @newbeginnings8566 5 лет назад

    Great family photos. Made me laugh as our kids did the same exploring.
    When your children are older try Europa-Park, Rust.
    We live in a village near Chalon sur Saône in France. We like visiting Germany and the Freibourg area is the region nearest to us - still 3 hour drive.
    I honestly think they were surprised rather than rude. You were a big change in a small place and older people sometimes don't know how to react.

  • @HannaBckwrdsIsHanna
    @HannaBckwrdsIsHanna 4 года назад

    Hey!! Came across your channel, I'm living in Germany with my husband and we live an hour away from Würzburg!! :)

  • @dustyfun5944
    @dustyfun5944 5 лет назад +14

    You look like Kate, the Duchess of Cambridge. At least I see some similiarity. It's your hair.

    • @AntoinetteEmily
      @AntoinetteEmily  5 лет назад +1

      Thank you! I can’t see the resemblance but I’m gonna take that as a compliment cause I love Kate 😊

  • @furzkram
    @furzkram 5 лет назад +3

    Stone Age locals: that would have happened to any German moving in there as well. It takes a loooong time and lots of effort until they start to melt. Has nothing to do with you being from another country. Anybody who wasn't born there would experience the same.

  • @jessyscooking8584
    @jessyscooking8584 5 лет назад +1

    I am glad you Held on n found that germans are warm hearted n helpful people. I am malaysian chinese n it took me over 30 yrs to feel at home.
    Now i am old n a "rentnerin"🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @Jupiterdance
    @Jupiterdance 5 лет назад +3

    Maybe you could say "Grüß Gott" instead of "Hallo" if it comes to a contact with a local, especially when they are older.

  • @RustyDust101
    @RustyDust101 5 лет назад +1

    That is just typical German villagers for you. They don't think badly of you because you are not German, they probably don't think badly of you at all.
    But because you are from outside the village you represent something new.
    They simply like their typical tiny society to be safely comfy, and something or someone new might disturb that.
    The smaller the village, the more closely knit they usually are.
    Even though my dad was distantly related to one family (his great-great-great-great-great-grandfather was the same as one of the village's farmers ancestors) we were considered 'foreigners' or 'newcomers' when we built a house there. The village had a total population of 183, including babies and the eldest, when we moved there. Us being two adults and three kids thus represented a fairly high percentage of 'newcomers' for that village. Everybody knew everyone else by first name, knew about who dated whom, what each and everyone worked as, who to talk to if you had a specific problem in your house or garden, etc.
    My parents still live there, now themselves part of the community since 1973. They have finally been accepted as 'part of the village community', and not 'newcomers' anymore. When that happened, we can't be certain, but it definitely took more than ten years.

  • @maggielee4137
    @maggielee4137 5 лет назад

    Hi, I really love your channel. I know the area where you live very well and I can relate to a lot of things that you are saying. The lower franconian cordiality is quite special („Net gschimpft is globt gnug“) . I grew up in another small village close to Würzburg as the daughter of an African American US Army Officer. I am sure you know the village where I live, does S. Oliver ring a bell?

  • @WILTALK
    @WILTALK 5 лет назад +3

    First impressions are all important. I believe your relations with the villagers might have gone far better had you refrained from breaking into a traditional Maori haka on your first meeting.
    Sorry but I just couldn't pass that up. I really enjoy your video's. I was born in Franconia, but my parents and siblings came there during WW2 from Ukraine. Needless to say they also were not welcomed with open arms. Not only were we Auslander speaking "hochdeutsch," but to top that off, also Protestants transplanted into an entirely Catholic inhabited region. However, it was not long until they were accepted. If it can happen to us it can happen to anyone.
    As many of the previous posters have mentioned, it is not about rejecting someone because they are foreigners, but rather a rejection of what they perceive as people not having the same values. When we decided to emigrate to the USA they were in tears as if they were losing family. Years later when many of us returned for a visit, we were always welcomed as if we had never left. Those kinds of friendships are slow developing but heartfelt, deep and long-lasting.

  • @papaya8634
    @papaya8634 4 года назад +1

    I am German and I have lived in a German village for a while. Me and my family were treated just like you, we were new und we were not so snobby like the other families there, so they didn't like us. So I know this feeling of not being welcome. But you can be sure that many Germans find such people snobby and stupid, actually everyone thinks that except the snobby ones themselves ;)

  • @FiveOClockTea
    @FiveOClockTea 5 лет назад +9

    When i was about 4 years old my family moved from Nordrhein-Westfalen to a small city near Würzburg. Lets just say, you are a "foreigner" in any village if you (and your parents) weren't born there... 🙄

    • @FiveOClockTea
      @FiveOClockTea 5 лет назад +1

      @Evi1M4chine I don't think it really has to do with dunbar's number. it's more of an people know each other from birth, because their parents knew each other from birth thing, and when you're new, even if you are only 4 years old, you are not accepted as a part of the community, even by other 4 year olds. The only friends I made in the first 2~3 years were other kids that also moved there.

  • @ulrichlehnhardt4293
    @ulrichlehnhardt4293 5 лет назад

    so glad that you found such wonderful place to live. As you probably know people in villages are not necessarily unfriendly, they are just different. I would say they are more shy than others and don't really know what to say or how to make small talk.

  • @Tommusix
    @Tommusix 5 лет назад +7

    Don't worry. Some regions in Germany are a little bit difficult. I had to fight against local people as German in Lower Saxony. When they realized you don't speak Low German, you're an alien.

    • @aniinnrchoque1861
      @aniinnrchoque1861 5 лет назад +1

      Honestly... Lern platt.. muss ja.. nette Sprache in jedem Fall

    • @die7vondertankstelle276
      @die7vondertankstelle276 5 лет назад +1

      Mostly you become alienized when they realize you do not belong to their local genpool...

  • @geraldharvey8979
    @geraldharvey8979 3 года назад

    Very informative! Thank you!

  • @Apachedownunder
    @Apachedownunder 5 лет назад

    Merry Christmas Antoinette! Best wishes to you and your family for 2019. Sam’s and Diane from Sydney/Giessen

  • @panzerknackerpaul2061
    @panzerknackerpaul2061 4 года назад

    Im Sauerland bin ich 6 Wochen in die gleiche Kneipe zum Bundesliga gucken, bis sich ein anderer als die Wirtsfamilie mit mir unterhalten hat. So ist das auf dem Land, das geht nicht nur dem Kiwi so. :D

  • @JuttaandWolly
    @JuttaandWolly 5 лет назад

    Fits to my last comment : you had a stereotype German reaction with a stereotype outcome. You're accepted now and slowly acquaintances turn to (German definition) friends. You are a well Germanized New Zealander.
    .
    Guten Rutsch ins neue Jahr!!!
    .
    Grüße an Hayley und Kelly und Aspen ! Kommen die zu deiner Hauseinweihung (wäre doch ein super Video zugleich?)

  • @jasonjames6870
    @jasonjames6870 2 года назад

    Village's in England are like this even with people who are from a few miles down the road. I think it's a small village thing

  • @hipocampelofantocame
    @hipocampelofantocame 5 лет назад +1

    Learn some German, shop in the local shops and eat out in the popular pub. Be interested in your
    village and you will do well if you become a long term resident. Kind of like the States.

  • @helfgott1
    @helfgott1 5 лет назад

    You are so welcome ,yes its hard to live in a german village,but just stay the way you are,and it will be ok

  • @rhedgeloberes
    @rhedgeloberes 5 лет назад

    Hearing your story now was a bit scary for me..I am waiting for my contract from one of the hospitals in Nürnberg and I don’t know what will happen to me If i will move to Nürnberg soon. I hope I will be able to have that acceptance from the community too since I want to bring my Husband too.
    It will be a complete stranger for me since I was working in Saudi Arabia before as a Nurse and most of the locals was so warm and friendly.

  • @Arltratlo
    @Arltratlo 4 года назад

    lol, i went to some bigger town in NZ, Levine would be one, its a big town of 5000 people, i am from a small town in northern Germany, with around 44.000 people... so the old couple i was talking to in my hotel in Napier NZ , the old guy said, that we have some diffrent views about numbers... and i am the first German they meet, funny, every 2nd corner i went around, i was meeting Germans... it helps if you know the language...lol

  • @dvf4550
    @dvf4550 5 лет назад +1

    When I was 12 my family moved from a city to a tiny village, both in Montana in the USA. Although Montanans are notoriously friendly and helpful people, in the tiny villages this situation also existed. Everyone was related to each other, it seemed, by marriage if not by blood. We were considered outsiders and didn't quite "belong" for a long time, especially my city bred mother who never did fit in the five years she lived there before they divorced and she went back to the city. My dad was a ranching and farming cowboy so he integrated well. The village itself is very tiny as most of the community lives spread out on their scattered farms and ranches. So it is important to participate in community events to get to know people and assimilate. They need to know you're not going to be a stuck up "city slicker." Most of the community activities center around the school so it was easier if you have children. Anyway I understand what you are talking about. It's not anything really personal though. It just takes a while for them to get used to the change. And an outsider is a "change," lol.

  • @drinkcoffeewithjasmin5938
    @drinkcoffeewithjasmin5938 5 лет назад +2

    Some Germans are a little bit sceptical and especially for people in villages it is important to speak their language.

  • @wernerruf7761
    @wernerruf7761 5 лет назад

    You are wrong. - In fact, it is not the only wine region in Bavaria. In "Schwaben und Altbayern" there are also growing areas.
    In Swabia, in the part of Bavaria bordering Lake Constance and in "Altbayern", there is the Baierwein.
    And that for quite some time, "regio Baiovariorum viniferax", that was the year 649.
    In Diafadol they even make champagne out of it.
    Not to forget.

    By decision of 2016-07-04, the Holzerhof was the first Upper Bavarian agricultural enterprise to be granted cultivation and sale of wine grapes by the Federal Agency for Agriculture and Food.
    The vineyard was created in the spring of 2017 in the southern corridor Ismanings (near Munich) on the best farmland.

    • @AntoinetteEmily
      @AntoinetteEmily  5 лет назад

      I thought Lower Frankonia (Unterfranken) was the only wine region in Bavaria. Thanks for pointing that out and I apologise for the mistake.

    • @wernerruf7761
      @wernerruf7761 5 лет назад

      @@AntoinetteEmily No problem, you will not find Baierwein in the supermarket ;-). But vineyards are also in Middle Franconia and Upper Franconia, not only in Lower Franconia.

  • @michaelknulle6924
    @michaelknulle6924 5 лет назад +2

    You are such a nice person you will made it everywere .i wish you and your family a very good slide into 2019 health and sucsess whith your housbuilding projekt

    • @AntoinetteEmily
      @AntoinetteEmily  5 лет назад

      Thank you so much for your kind words.
      Ebenfalls einen guten Rutsch ins neue Jahr 🎇 😊❤️

  • @isitramt
    @isitramt 4 года назад

    Moving from Lower Saxony to Baden-Württemberg in the 1960s: on his first walk with his two small children my father was checked by an police officer in a 10k inhabitants village because he has never been seen there before (that was right :-))
    And you will never belong to the 'inner circle' of the village. Bärbel, a friend of our family, married and her husband moved to her village. He is "only" "Bärbels husband". On the other hand this doesn't prevent you from having a good live in such a place.

  • @jorgschimmer8213
    @jorgschimmer8213 5 лет назад

    Yes. Especially in franconia and these village people need more time to get used to new people ! And i would never mention which village you are living in. Happy new year.

  • @johannesbusch8161
    @johannesbusch8161 5 лет назад

    Würzbürg - so cute to hear you pronouncing it. Do you really ask if you're welcome? Of course you are!
    You are right not to take people's restrained behaviour as an impoliteness (of course is IS impolite to stare at you first and then ignore you). People just need to know you better before they begin to "warm up". Whenever you choose to enter social life by engaging/volunteering in a social club like (church) choir, sports club, charity events things will move much faster and you will find lot of new friends - especially when you live in a small town or village.
    Please keep up. It's always enlightening to listen to a foreigner. My daughter recently went to New Zealand for a year to engage in an environmental project. I'm very curious what her impressions will be (it's kind of windy in Wellington I know so far).
    Stay well!
    And a Happy New 💥☄2019☄💥

  • @vane12685
    @vane12685 5 лет назад

    What is the population in the village you live now? The village we lived in was 6000 people. But the family that lived in the house we lived was military as well so we were immediately accepted. When we went for walks we did get stares but everyone always says hello. And now I miss "home" again. Cant wait for your home tour!!

    • @AntoinetteEmily
      @AntoinetteEmily  5 лет назад

      The population here is around 1200. I didn’t realize you also lived in a small village too.
      I’m very excited about the house tour, I just hope it won’t be too far away.

    • @vane12685
      @vane12685 5 лет назад

      @@AntoinetteEmily wow 1200 is super tiny. It looks so picturesque! I love it.

  • @ti.k.1107
    @ti.k.1107 5 лет назад +2

    I am a Franconian expat living in Australia, just saying G'Day... ;-)

    • @nicolepfaff5607
      @nicolepfaff5607 4 года назад

      You don’t live in Adelaide by any chance?
      I am from Bamberg-Land

  • @paulwebbiweb
    @paulwebbiweb 5 лет назад +4

    Ironical that in the New Zealand accent "get better" sounds like "get bitter" to most other English speakers (or to be exact "git bitter").

  • @hagenmassar4555
    @hagenmassar4555 5 лет назад +1

    Emilia as a little Baby looks exactly like her brother.

  • @michelroerig7825
    @michelroerig7825 5 лет назад +3

    Well the behavoir you described is typical for Germans in a village. It takes very long to make friends. Germans are very suspiciously in general. But after a certain time you will have friends forever. Inn towns people are more superficial.

  • @WimiBussard
    @WimiBussard 5 лет назад

    Würzburg is an university city, so renting prices are horrendous, because you have to compete with a lot of students. Searching outside of Würzburg was your only choice. I bet, many folks are feeling with you. ^^ :)

  • @helfgott1
    @helfgott1 5 лет назад +1

    Dear Antionette its hard to live in a closed community like a village.you will be a stranger because you were not born in this village.dont worry even a hard bavarian heart wil melt looking at your daughter

  • @paddy1941
    @paddy1941 3 года назад

    Short answer for a big question: yes, you are more than welcome!

  • @johola
    @johola 5 лет назад

    i grew up in such a village. wouldn´t ever want to live there again :D

  • @Alewxx
    @Alewxx 5 лет назад

    Village is never easy, and the really evil things only shop up after some years, but when you are accepted then it is from the first moment.

  • @Stephanthesearcher
    @Stephanthesearcher 5 лет назад +2

    it just takes awhile for the locals to get convinced that you are not destructive and toxic

  • @faceworld
    @faceworld 5 лет назад

    Thanks for your information... Have u been went to Indonesia?

  • @sallylondon6101
    @sallylondon6101 2 года назад

    Hello,new subscriber here..is the village puschendorf?

  • @neoliberalerneandertaler9347
    @neoliberalerneandertaler9347 5 лет назад

    God i like your vlog.every morning i get Used to it.it is like injecting my Daily Dosis heroin. Lol

  • @898unicorn
    @898unicorn 4 года назад

    May i ask whats the name of this village? id love to add to my travel bucket list (even if i can never afford it rip)

  • @kaiman.offical01
    @kaiman.offical01 5 лет назад +1

    Looks like a really nice Village you´re living in... I´m a little bit jealous now... :-)

    • @FiveOClockTea
      @FiveOClockTea 5 лет назад

      It's a really nice place 😊
      There're lots of beautiful hiking/dog-walking paths 🐶

  • @conniep3164
    @conniep3164 4 года назад

    You're too nice, Antoinette. You should go and live where people are friendly and nice too.

  • @helfgott1
    @helfgott1 5 лет назад

    I cannt help there might be a lot of more things to think about but i would like to ask the commuity: is there any more cute lady but Emilia when she was wearing this red and white dress?No

  • @rogerblumenstein1238
    @rogerblumenstein1238 5 лет назад +3

    What always helps is a nice little BBQ with the new neighbours.

  • @YukiTheOkami
    @YukiTheOkami 5 лет назад

    Itsna bavarian village
    One of the most well "traditional" places butnibdont mean dirndelnif ibsay traditionalni mean the way to think

  • @anniebe4992
    @anniebe4992 5 лет назад +1

    125.000 is not a big city? I guess I'm living in a small town/village then 😮😢

    • @rosmarinlavendel1477
      @rosmarinlavendel1477 5 лет назад +1

      Annie Be germany is small due other countries and cities we consider as large are small to them.

    • @anniebe4992
      @anniebe4992 5 лет назад +1

      @@rosmarinlavendel1477 I'm from Germany 😊 but I live in a small town that is less than 10% of 125.000 inhabitants, I think we have 8.000, so 125.000 is quite big already, of course not a metropolis yet 😊