Trans* | Sam Amore | TEDxEmersonCollege
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- Опубликовано: 25 июн 2024
- Trans* people are important. Many colleges environments understand this fact, but not many people here understand what it means to be Trans*. To help, Amore aims to map their personal evolution as a Trans* individual and offer suggestions as to what Emerson can do to create healthier, more open dialogues for Trans* & gender neutral students and make the college an inclusive, safe space for anyone nonbinary.
Sam Amore is a transgender person and student at Emerson College who is striving to create a healthier and more open dialogue around Trans and gender-neutral individuals on the college campus.
This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at ted.com/tedx
This person is an exceptionally skilled public speaker.
No notes.
I had a narcissistic mother and a series of narcissistic relationships (when it's all you've ever known, it's common to attract the same energy repeatedly). Though I'm free of narcissistic relationships now, I must say that as charming, charismatic, intelligent, and compelling as this speaker was, what she is demonstrating is at its core narcissism. I've become SO SENSITIVE to even the subtlest techniques/tactics/tendencies that I cannot help but my intuition alarm bells going off after watching this talk to the very end. I am VERY MUCH NOT transphobic and believe humanity is by nature (including biologically) fluid. Our genes epigenetically express based on our environment, culture, and exposures and experiences, and our bodies, brains, minds, and spirits adapt beautifully. I do believe that we need to restructure our cultures around the world to be more understanding, educated, and accepting of different identities. However, I take issue with the lack of compassion for how challenging it is for someone to re-write the language that they know and to suddenly be forced to use it differently, and to shut up and not complain about it. THAT'S where I see the narcissism. I see the covert narcissism pattern here the most: using one's suffering and vulnerability against others and as a form of exerting power and control. I also understand that most narcissistic people have trauma in their background, and for that I have compassion. But adults are responsible for introspection, figuring out how to harmonize within and deal with the traumas (often we need to ask for help), and to learn how to STILL treat people with kindness and respect nonetheless. This rigid expectation that we suddenly use pronouns that others ask us to, which create confusion for those of us who are comfortable indentifying within the binary system, is actually a punishment. I understand that many who read this will feel offended by what I am saying. But many of us refuse to accept the delusions of others. Just because a rejection of someone's delusion hurts doesn't make the delusion any less of a delusion. Just like I'm not going to give into a child throwing a tantrum just to get him to calm down when his behavior is inappropriate (i.e. not accepting a "no"), I'm also not going to allow people who feel victimized by not being called by their preferred pronouns violate my boundaries. The answer to transpeople suffering is not to violate the boundaries of others.....Narcissists do not respect boundaries. Again, I'm not transphobic. I just see MANY characteristics of narcissism in this talk. Again, I've been through a lot of narcissistic abuse and am familiar with how the abuser will completely re-write reality and gaslight in order to get their way. I'm sensitive to all the nuances, even the subtlest, including those that are scientifically supported and informed.
I loved this talk! We need to build more positivity and acceptance for all trans people. It's basic human respect.
I came to be educated, I'm more confused now.
I think this talk was a fabulous introduction to help cisgender people understand there is different experiences out there.
My only issue with it is that Sam completely disregards gender fluid people, particularly by saying pronouns aren’t like putting on a tie that day. Some gender fluid people do have fluctuating pronouns day by day, and to imply that peoples pronouns are fixed when they choose them can cause potential problems for gender fluid people.
Also saying a persons identity is not complicated, completely disregards people who’s identities are complicated/ questioning. Sometimes this talk reads like you have to know who you are to be respected, otherwise you don’t get that right.
3:55 When I use they/them pronouns as a non-binary person, I am specifically trying *not* to come up with "my own pronouns"; I'm going with the most popular pronoun for non-binary people in English, with the goal of keeping things simple for others.
Thank you. These education of terms and mannerism are how we can learn to adapt as a society. Needed and appreciated!
i just found this talk, why does it have such little view? it's so amazing! :D the speaker seems so friendly i love their energy! it made me happy just to listen to them!
You were not listening to "them" because it was only one person......so either her or it would be grammatically correct
@@isaacdaniell1157 hiding in replies huh? I get the pathetic pride you seem to exude.
@@isaacdaniell1157 "hi, I don't understand basic english grammar"
Sansot I was just thinking that. This speaker seems so friendly, I'd love to be around that energy!
Wow, the best public speaker that I've ever heard! Keep speaking out on this & other LGBTQI topics Sam. Well done 👍
Most of this comment section makes me lose hope in humanity.
The funny thing is that somehow it doesn’t seem to be something one can negotiate on our side. So this emergence happening is also a tremendous mystery. I’m thinking around issues of consciousness and art too.
Thank you for doing this talk Sam. I'm looking for videos and other sources to show my mom (who is coming around after years of my husband and i being out). I won't show her this one until a bit later on because i want to give her smaller things slowly, but I'm keeping it listed for later.
The comment section can be a nightmare sometimes, but i want you to know that you at least reached out and helped us
5 years later and we are still fighting for our basic rights 😔
Ikr 😢
Great talk and good overall gender variant info
My pronouns are 'I', 'Me' and 'My'.
What am I doing? Exercising your right to freedom and choice, but it really depends on your community. If it is inclusive by nature all ok but if not it becomes dangerous. So we are also a test of the most authentic kind. 👍
Mx., like Mr. and Ms., is not a suffix. Those are honorifics.
I insist on using they in all writing regardless of singular or plural. I have never met a person that would like to be addressed as such. It would take a little getting used to when there is a specific person in front of you.
You would find me very much so confusing. I switch my genders a lot, due to the fact one day I can feel masculine and the next day I could feel feminine, some days, I feel non-binary.
Hi Sam. I really hope life is going well for you! Please give me a shout however you might want, whenever you might want. Our family would love to keep in touch with you. If not, that's ok, but feel free anytime...
Wonderful and eloquent, thanks for the concise talk
People love to be offended
A great and informative presentation. I realize that i have much self-reflection and awareness work to do around the topic of trans pronouns and language.
Thank you for a very useful, practical and candid presentation. Looking into everything I can to improve my alliance skills. Signed with love, my prounouns are she/her. Namaste!!!
16:18 Geez... we gotta do better to change these statistics.
@Drive Tone You hateful folks have too much time on your hands. Go do something helpful and volunteer at your local children's cancer ward, senior center, or animal shelter.
this is fantastic!
This woman needs to be publicly
*person
@@TheybornInTheSnow person applies to humans. This woman is not
@@ccmetalheadsorry, you're saying sam isn't a person?
@@TheybornInTheSnow yes
@@ccmetalhead Sam needs to be publicly what? You're being mad offensive.
Good talk.
What a wonderful Ted Talk !!!
I can't get over how their mowhawk isn't quite centered
I am really sorry you have to put up with us normal people . But I suggest you all put name tags on, whenever you leave your house. That way people will know how to address you. It is IMPOSSIBLE to understand how each and everyone of you prefers to be called so as not to hurt your feelings. Although we normal people put up with it on a daily basis, especially at the workplace ie nicknames that no one ask for .
Trans people are normal~i dont want you to think im coming at you i just wanted to clarify
Also just a quick heads up so you don't feel awkward if someone tell you to use xe/xir just say they/them cause neo pronouns dont actually exist 😂
@@lolwolf1344 I will not be having that problem, I prefer to address people by their name. I doubt your name is Laugh out loud wolf134 and if it is, good to meet you Laugh out loud wolf 134. And everyone has what they consider "normal" which is not equal in the eyes of everyone. Trans people are not normal to me because a "normal" person does not have to transition, they are happy the way they are. If transitioning were normal, these discussions would not be on the internet, because they would be a normal boring part of everyday life, which it is not. When it happens , people make a big deal about it thus making it abnormal, and as you said, I'm not coming at you, just stating my opinion.
@David Vanpatten ok thank you 🤣🤠
@David Vanpatten come back when you can spell normal
You have no right to dictate what words and expressions I should use or not use and how I should act or not act. I didn't subscribed to your ideology, stop imposing it on it. In my view you are play pretending not being a woman, and I'm not interested to participate in this game.
New Tedx Videos in 2023
On Gender Identity of Mind & Body Experience
Women Identities of Gender
Trans Women
Nonconforming Men
Men Identities of Gender
Trans Men
Nonconforming Women
Cringe af
you do realize that a teeny fraction of the population is asking the vast majority to change their beliefs and perceptions to accommodate your lifestyle. You're assuming that everyone is paying attention to an ideology that is not based on science but on the ideology itself. Walk down any main street usa and ask people what gender pronoun they prefer to be called and you'll see what I'm saying.
It is based on science
It’s a psychological disconnect from the person’s brain to their body. It’s similar to depression in that it can’t be “cured” or taken away from someone. It only treated with hormonal therapy and surgery. They don’t just wake up one day and say “lol let’s be a girl today”.
Absolutely..........
@@2yearoldeastercandy935 none of that is scientific but all is ideology......it is not treated with hormonal and surgery because suicides remain the same stat before or after......
@@isaacdaniell1157 and they stay the same because of the lack of societal acceptance and people like you who are convinced that there's some kind of ideological agenda going on.
He, she & it.
U like being called it?
I can tolerate pretty much anything but a vocal fry.
As a transgender women i do not consider drag as an "art" that would be insult to real artist in my opinion. I wish people didn't mix us with any crossdresser,transexual,none-confirm,q,z,g,,l,x there is so many. We just trapped in wrong body and all this politicians using us for some bathroom issue is so sad. Its also sad that while we have so much real (life and death) transgender issues speaker "them" "they" concept is to confusing for most people. Lets talk about 35 transgender women last month was arrested in Saudi Arabia and 2 of them were beaten to death by police officers . I think Ted Talk can use more women ( transgender or cisgender ) being slaved, honor killings ( in US and canada on the rise ) FGM, child brides
Drag people are pretty amazing in my opinion. Just because you dont want to get confused with them doesnt mean you need to be so negative about them. Also why talk about 35 trans women killed in saudi arabia when thousand are killed all the time in jamaica, when many are harassed in america, when many are brutally killed openly in the streets of jamaica,etc? Many countries are not so accepting of trans people.
IN saudi Arabia transgender women ( this just happened last month ) was beaten to death BY POLICE . And i am from middle east and i am talking about what i know if you know about other countries ( beside US, i am aware of the horrible life of transgender youth , especially colored kids) it would be nice to bring awareness and talk and spread tragic info
Was this ignored? If it was, I'm disgusted by humanity. One man is killed (yes, I do care for this situation very much just so you know, but hear me out when i say this next part) but when two trans women are killed by being beat to death by police, it is ignored, no protests at all?
I’m a trans but this is omg.
Are judging their style, or their presentation?
oh gawd..as a trans myself ...this is embarrassing to watch
Please explain why you're embarrassed by this talk. How would you do better?
@@karmamelk9 they're creating a connection with the presenter to seem an objective authority with no bias. The truth in what they're saying is, "I am bigoted and trying to convince you to be the same with faux civility.'
Yeah idk, this person is nonbinary and not trans.
Grammar is more important to me than screwed-up people are.
If grammar was so important to you, you would know that "they" has been a singular pronoun for AT LEAST hundreds of years. I can say without a doubt that you have used it as such at least thousands of times since posting that comment without even being aware of it.
What a misguided person living in lust-based society.
The speaker was talking about identity. Has nothing to do with lust.
Good luck keeping this up in the trump area!
😢😢😢
😗😗🤔😘
Hello from 2021! It seems the "trump area" is a lot smaller than it used to be 😛
I’m glad I’m not trans this stuff gets boring after two minutes lmao
God makes NO MISTAKES.
But nature does. Take the sad cases of human beings been born deformed. God bless them all. I am a Christian.
Correct. These people were born trans and have had to deal with a dissonance between themselves and who they see in the mirror for at least a noteable portion of their lives. I don't know if I support a god who induces this kind of suffering upon his own children.
Gender Nonconforming Men Episodes
Not Cisgeder. Keeping the old pronouns. Thanks anyway.
Gender Nonconforming Women Episodes
God I hate this world
That is your loss moron.
oh i hate you too :)
They and them may be gender neutral but they are also PLURAL
Or a term used when referencing an ambiguous party.
I assume that means thou dost not use "you" to be singular either?
You people don't seem to understand that a pronoun (which, by the way, includes stuff like I, my, and you) can be used in multiple ways, singular or plural.
They and them have been singular longer than she/her and he/him have
@@giantjellyfishleader1399 But they are not now so don't impose it.