I'm 32, Congolese🇨🇩, born and raised in Paris France🇨🇵 moved in Toronto Canada 🇨🇦in 2019 and...the dating scene sucks! Men wanna hook up, be pen pal, be friends, don't take initiatives it's so exhausting.. so I've asked my French friends how is it out there and they told me it's not better so I don't even know if it's worth it moving back to Paris. I think the problem may be geographical but also generational 😕
@@ForMySoulSistas I am French but never lived in Paris.... I would tend to think that French people can be quite 'traditionnal' as in wanting to actually be in a stable relationship... But I don't know... However I believe French can be 'racist' as in white date white and aren't always used to diversity outside of Paris or outside of big cities in general. There are exceptions of course
@WHITES LOVE MY PLAYLISTS reposting same message still? data shows your a white supremacist, I've seen your Playlist ( Adolf Hitler channel along with other white nationalist idealogies)
Tyler yes I would not recommend ! But Grand Prairie is really nice for black women. It’s very diverse.. as a Texan, Texas is a racist state in general but a lot of black people live here and thrive here
someone i know once described NYC as being like real life Tinder and it couldnt be any more true. The problem is that everyone has ‘options’. It’s kind of like endless pieces of cake. No one here is ever ready to commit and if you find someone here that is, they’ve probably said the same to 3 other people 🤦🏾♀️
@WHITES LOVE MY PLAYLISTS I don’t agree with this. The best place is where the standard of beauty is black women. Supply and demand doesn’t really apply to the dating market. Living in some rural village as the only blk person doesn’t make you more attractive
That's scary TINDER IRL 😒 y'all gone make me buy my husband something expensive and that he don't need but really want just because I appreciate the fact that he ain't like these mofos in these streets, I'm giving God all the glory right now for that man ... I don't know how Stephco topics draw me into this BS all the time when I'm not even her target audience but it's just so fascinating
hahahaha , the "no one is ever ready to commit b/c there's so many options it makes ppl think there's always something better out there" part hits the nail on the head for where I live in Los Angeles (directly between Beverly Hills and DTLA)
I'm 31, Congolese🇨🇩, born and raised in Paris France🇨🇵 moved in Toronto Canada 🇨🇦in 2019 and...the dating scene sucks! Men wanna hook up, be pen pals, be friends, don't take initiatives it's so exhausting.. so I've asked my French friends how is it out there and they told me it's not better so I don't even know if it's worth it moving back to Paris. I think the problem may be geographical but also generational 😕
Please explain more on the pen pal thing… I thought pen pals was something you did with children in other countries or prisoners maybe 🤷🏽♀️ It’s a relationship alternative now??
@@ShaniZaki17713 I could be wrong, but I'm assuming it's not a literal pen pal. But someone who just wants to text instead of actually dating in real life.
A good to realize is someone else's experience wouldn't always be your own. Life hands us different cards. Just because other black women found success or love in a city doesn't guarantee you would. So I'd advise you not to move for unless you have a concrete reason to, or you just might end up getting disappointed.
AZ born and raised! I can confirm dating as a black woman is extremely difficult ESPECIALLY if you prefer dating black men. Growing up, it’s not uncommon for black boys to bully us black girls for skin tone, hair texture etc :( Also other races seem to overly fetishize me instead of date seriously - most of the guys here prefer Mexican and white women for long term relationships. I never felt good enough my whole life and I constantly struggle with self esteem! My advice if you live in an area like this and you can’t move: Date guys that are not from where you live!!!! My current boyfriend is from the mid-west - been in AZ for a year or so when we met. To be loved by a black man that prefers sisters and embraces my 4C hair and doesn’t mind if my skin tans in the summer feels like a fairytale for me lol
@Hails I’m Az born and raised too. I agree with a lot of your experience growing up here. As I got older I found that I had to date black men who were from the Midwest, East Coast or South. My bf of 2 years is from the Midwest. I really love Az tho… it has really offered me great employment, a great community to raise my son and just overall a place where I feel accepted for the most part. As a dark skinned woman I believe that anywhere I live I will be not the “preferred” choice by the masses but I’ve never had an issue with dating and meeting quality men who do prefer me.
So I will say New York is great for dating. Men here actually like black women BUT if you’re looking for marriage, 2 1/2 kids with the white picket fence, there’s not a lot of that going on here. I honestly think people are either really distracted by the abundance of choice OR they’re burdened by the cost of living and less likely to feel comfortable settling down in that way. Not a lot of weddings happening here. You might get a boyfriend you could split rent with though
I’m married in NYC and love it. NYC has 3 groups: immigrants, transient grifters from Kansas, Utah, California etc and a tight circle of generational New Yorkers. It’s a hard social circle to crack. And it’s based on knowing someone who knows someone who knows someone’s cousin.
As a native NYer yes it is very easy to date here....especially if you have the PG factor. However, if you want to marry and stay or upgrade to a certain class level it's highly competitive and you will be competing with women of ALL races.
Just moved from Virginia Beach 🏝 to the DMV a couple months ago. Virginia Beach is a good place to live for black women.. but the dating options are terrible! It’s near a large naval military base, so the guys just want to hook up or the local dusties will try to pursue you. So far, dating in the DMV has been fun. Loving it so far. I’m 27 and moved to this area to find love and a great career! Wish me luck ladies 😆
Very true. I live in Hampton,Va which is 30 min away from va beach. Everything you said was true but the diversity here is great and I experienced way less racism compared to my home state of Cali. Also, the Hampton roads area and DMV is great for black women who like dating non black men. I’ve seen more black women with non black men than the other way around. My husband is military but he is from the Midwest. There are ALOT of singles out here who aren’t military but may come from military families. They seem to be good options and wealth is definitely accounted for in their families. Also, many people get out of the military here and leave but the ones who stay are typically looking to settle down. I’ve had the best dating experiences here and the DMV.
I've lived in Alexandria, VA for almost a year now and it's great. As a New Yorker it's a change of pace, but if i want some city life (without as many people/pollution) Washington D.C is only a 15 min drive away. There's lots to do in the area, it is safe, and diverse. Jobs do pay well here if you have the education or experience. This is the most stable I've been in a while. The price of living is not cheap though, damn near New York prices but I can't even get lamb over rice at 12am here because everything is closed.. As far as dating goes, I haven't been actively dating so I can't really elaborate.
Thank you for this, I moved out to VA Beach from NY and as a dental assistant, they pay shit out here. I thought my experience counted but I guess not lmao looking on indeed, Alexandria pays the same as NY. You saved my ass fr 😂
I love traveling to D.C. from Hampton roads area. I always enjoy myself. Alexandria in the fall is so cozy and I love their old towne downtown area. So many different restaurants and the vibe was nice. The people were nicer than those in D.C. and the men were friendly too.
After reading all the comments I really think That article was talking about demographics. It's basically just saying because black people live there you have a chance to thrive and date. It's racist at best. Just because a man is black and a woman is black doesn't automatically Mean you are compatible. The income part is because you may have high earnings because there are more black women in that area.
This is so true ! My friend Folashade Mordi was shoot and killed in Chicago this year. She was actually from the suburbs and went to see her bf in Chicago on her damn birthday and was killed that night 😭 idk why they would recommend a dangerous place. SMH .
@@C_theesiren I’m curious if the person who wrote the article thinks that way. Look at what everyone one is saying. Some of the areas have high crime rates. How do you thrive when you are afraid of walking down the street? Thriving is not just about money. So what the article is suggesting is stay around your own. I’m sorry I don’t buy into that. The racist part is, it’s just compiling a list of high demographics of black people. To me that’s segregation. It’s not new, I just won’t live like that.
California is going to rank high in regard to health care because of the Kaiser Permenante system. It’s one of the few states with broad healthcare for all citizens. The pay in California is comparably higher than other states. There is still the issue of cost of living. Having lived in California, if you’re outside of major metropolitan areas, you feel like you’re in Mississippi. It doesn’t seem as though they factored in things like marriage or sense of community through surveys when this list was curated. What something looks like on paper is not necessarily going to dictate your experience. My pay is lower in Philadelphia, but I can pursue my interest and have a sense of community . While my pay may be increased by 40% living outside of Philadelphia, there are few other benefits. I actually have great insurance, but when I go to these health offices run by whites and staffed by whites, they insinuate I’m dirty and promiscuous. They are so focused on what diseases black women are statistically more likely to have they don’t actually screen or manage the things I actually came to have taken care of. Great insurance doesn’t equal better healthcare. More money doesn’t mean your happiness is increased.
Oh wow. I’m from the outskirts of Philly, I’ve never felt that way when going to the doctors, but i will say generally doctors ignore black womens concerns and symptoms. The healthcare system is not friendly to us But Montgomery county in PA was just the worst county in all areas of life anyway. I said in another comment that PA is trash
Omg , I lived in Philly for a contract , I’ve also lived in nyc & disliked it a lot . But I loved & had a great experience in Philly . I’m looking to move to cali now . Idk what to doooo 😂
My family immigrated to NYC. We were priced out and moved to the outer boughs. I moved back to Manhattan with my husband where he purchased us an apartment. I got a full scholarship to a Uni in Upstate NY. A red Catholic conservative state where everyone looked like children of the corn - just different shades of blond from Albino blond to mousey blond. I had a GREAT dating life! Who would’ve dunk it? Now I was a division one track star, student athlete and a cheerleader on my off season. I was treated like a badie badie by w guys who took me on lavish intentionally dates, paid for Spring break in Cabo, skiing in Aspen on Winter breaks and weekend homes to meet their parents. In my head I saw my prince as b but they were very few. 1. I date a handsome smart Jamaican medical student- I was falling in love until I found out his last gf was w and broke up with him. He stalked me and I had to lay low on campus. 2. A brilliant, but color struck Afro Latino. He said if he works hard and makes enough money his mother can get him a wife amongst the w Latino families in the DR. He was sweet and mercenary at the same time. Always comparing skin color and hair textures. 3. A Black American hockey player star Athlete from an upper middle class family. He asked me on a date, but was very hostile and competitive towards me. I was a couple minutes late to our date and he gave me a lecture about responsibility etc., when we both were student athletes that worked and had a full class load. He was attracted to me, while also looking down on me and he had no empathy for my well being. He saw me as other, when we had the same status. I ghosted him. I met my love, my forever husband. We both were the only b people in the area and instantly walked up to each other. He was a professional athlete in training camp. I was up there for cheerleading. He’s 6 3 and I’m 5 7. We both said perfect height. He said all the 4 11 girls chase him and need to be with 5 4 boys. I fell in love when I first saw him, he told me he was in love after 4 months and we got engaged after 6 and married a 1 and few months later. Afterwards, I found where I went to Uni was the most racist state for B people. But it was my best dating experience with W guys and as a virgin too!! And the place I fell in love. Well, I also fell in love when I was 5 but that didn’t pan out.
I'm an Afro Latina and what you said about the men is 100% correct. The women are proud of our African roots, the men are on a campaign to whiten the next generation. Where did your family immigrate from?
Bish you need to write this book I would so buy it ! 😂 I think people miss the moral of the story, mindset is everything, the best dating place for black women isn't geographical it's actual, like where ever you want to make it, like ask yourself WTF do you want out of life and out of a man, then go date men who want those things too, I dated all the dudes ( not slept with but actually dated) across all the continents but I ended up marrying someone I'd known since elementary school, my bff's (who is a guy) younger brother. I realized when it came to long haul relationship, I needed someone who I knew and who knew me for it to work. My husband and I are both army brats and I'm black, and my husband is Chinese American (his dad) and black ( his mom) side, his Mom, Dad and my Dad knew each other from highschool and my Dad and his Mom both joined the military out of highschool and her man's popped the question and followed her, but our Dad's are best friends from way back.
😢 You are ABSOLUTELY right about Corpus Christi. I did not find out until I moved there. Not only can I not get a doctor to see me there (even as a veteran;) but I am constantly discriminated against and ignored. I thought my hometown (Houston) was stressful. Yes, it was; but the emotional distress I feel in Corpus has made my blood pressure rise. Crazy enough, when I took a month 'vacation' back to stressful azz Houston, my blood pressure went back to normal. Note: I left my city as a lower income Black Woman, and returned as a wealthier woman who could afford an Airbnb for that long (away from my old hood.) I am in Houston right now, taking another break before catching a flight to Georgia. I am going on a real estate hunt for a couple of weeks. Wish me luck 🤞🏽
As a dark skin black woman living London, UK it can get quite difficult here but for black women, especially darker skinned black women in Europe and USA, our best bet is to be open to all races otherwise being single is gonna be the most likeliest of options. Loving the vids Steph!
I live in the DMV very cultural and high end affordable living. As a black women I see a lot of black couples like dark skin women / dark skin men 👏👏 it’s the perfect suburban area but still close to a city atmosphere
My city - Sandy Springs, GA was #8 on the list of the best cities for black women!!! That totally tracks because I moved here from California and I LOVE it here. I'm never going back to the west coast. Sandy Springs is just a couple of miles away from Buckhead and about a 20 minute drive to downtown Atlanta. Everyone in this city is so friendly and it's also very ethnically diverse.
@@C_theesiren You should visit and see if you like the area. The rent here is still lower than the average amount for the state of Georgia (forget the exact number).
I think there needs to be distinct data between Black women with families (mainly children) versus single, childless Black women, because what you’re looking for in a city or region is distinctly different. A mother might prioritize a city with great schools over a place with great dating prospects. Having said that! I used to work between offices in DC, Richmond, VA and the VA Beach/Chesapeake/Hampton Roads area. Although DC is a more fun place to be single, Black women in the VA Beach area definitely seemed to be some of the most partnered women I’d encountered in all of my travels. I will say I didn’t spend a lot of time in places like Newport News and Suffolk, so I won’t speak for the area generally. But I DEFINITELY noticed how many Black, two-parent families there were. All of the Black adults in the office where I worked were Black and either married or engaged. In fact, a few couples even worked in the office lol. Nobody was going to happy hour after work-everybody was going home to their spouses and their children. At the time, I was unmarried and childfree so I didn’t like visiting much, but it would probably be a great region now to explore. Employment seems steady (there’s a military base) and pre-pandemic, I know a lot of DC offices were considering offloading their offices to VA Beach and Richmond for cost purposes. ETA: I’ll also add that quite a few people asked if they could set me up with someone. I had a boyfriend so the answer was always no, but they were eager to get me with somebody lol
Met my now husband 3 months of moving to Houston from NYC. I enjoy both cities for different reasons, but I think overall Houston is one of the better places for single black women to thrive.
girl , i can believe this .. whenever i visit Houston , i meet a man trying to take me seriously , Lawd Lawd . that's neverrrrrr the case where i live in Los Angeles , at least not yet .. settling down into a committed relationship isn't high up enough on my priority list right now to move down South , as the most recent man I met in Houston was trying to convince me to do , but i definitely appreciate the Black men seriously checking for Black women out there
The black men enjoy black women SEX IN HOUSTON but to date ? The games are exhausting and you will end up married being a swinger or in a open relationship and I’m not doing that 😭
You've been coming through with the videos🙌 The goal isn't to move to other states but another country. I've met so many expats who've created communities and are living more comfortably. They open businesses, build relationships with locals and embrace their culture. Idk about dating, but overall mental health seems so much more important then dating and wealth☺️
@WHITES LOVE MY PLAYLISTS your profile pic, "white pride worldwide"? I don't fuck with white nationalists/supremacist, I've seen you post this same dusty message on other posts. So again kick rocks
I think dating really impacts your mental Health bc partnership is important for a lot of people and so is healthy sexual expression. I have heard that the expat life is the right life though…I want to do another video about that
Have you travelled abroad by yourself? Or lived in a different state? It takes a certain type of person to move let alone move to a different country, you have to be confident within yourself and have a strong back bone and mental state to make logical decisions because it's not for the faint hearted or all roses. You are literally starting over again, all those simple things are no longer simple to sort out because your status as a foreigner complicates your options. Also it helps if you have a career that's 8n demand, e.g. dr, nurses, specialist, engineer, chartered accountant then that's one less stress etc I'm just being honest because a lot of people who say they want to move to another country are just running away from something and hiding their head in the sand about something that they should deal with first
Expat life is incredible! I’m so glad I decided to live abroad, even though I decided later in life. Once u leave the US, it’s very difficult to go back so please be aware of that.
I agree! I live as an expat over the last 7 years. I'm currently in Serbia, and I see many Black American, European, and African women married to Serbians living their best life!
@@hellostephco84 those other countries being mentioned is a form of gaslighting. Anybody looking for Blake women in Panama or Columbia ain't got no money.
I’m originally from AZ/NV and if you’er not willing to date Latino men, then you’re going to have a hard time. All my boyfriends in high school were Spanish. There’s a lot of Latinos in this area. Also they may not marry you, but just date... because Latino women always break up a relationship, if their men date other races ( they’re super territorial, but will date a brotha in a heart beat 🙄...so prepare for that
Originally from NY, but moved to the DC area ( otherwise known as the DMV) after college. 10 years later, it is the best decision I’ve ever made. I have a great career and amazing husband. Many of my friends are in relationships and/or married. There are several men that make over six figures in this area, but the cost of living is pretty high here. Hope this is helpful!
I think in terms of improving your livelihood being on either coast is your best bet. I think those areas/regions tend to have opportunity, diversity and social activities. This is just an assumption, but I think moving to a place where you'd be a novelty will improve your dating possibilities. On another note I went to Los Angeles for the first time last year and I saw SO many black women in relationships, most of which were interracial. That contrasted what I'd been hearing about the LA dating scene for years.
@@sincereiam agreed. I live in Los Angeles, dead center pretty much, between Beverly Hills and DTLA, and if you're a Black woman interested in dating Black men, *the dating scene in L.A. is NOT for you* . my last relationship was with a man I met while in Houston for a girlfriend's birthday , the one before that was a guy i knew from secondary school back home in Louisiana that moved to L.A. (with me in mind, according to his best friend) .. since living in L.A., almost every guy that has put in enough effort to take me on a date was from the South , East Coast or a foreign country . there was only ONE from Inglewood that took me out after my thirsty behind basically begged by hinting until he finally did . i've been in L.A. for over 5 years now and am very social , always out and about , so it's not like i'm speaking from a limited experience . it's sad to say , but it's the truth , the vast majority of eligible Black bachelors in Los Angeles are NOT pursuing Black women
@@TeKeyaKrystal So why pursue black men then perhaps that’s the problem with black women quit being loyal to a group of men that aren’t checking for you… 🤷♀️
I live in Atlanta and I went to college in the Atlanta area and I had a overall positive dating experience. I met my college sweetheart and we’re still together. What I have noticed is that people that go to college in Atlanta are more likely to be partnered married or engaged because they usually meet their person through their college net work. However, moving to Atlanta as a women I would say 25 and up can be very challenging to date. I also noticed that Charlotte North Carolina wasn’t on the list for best cities to date, I’ve heard really positive things for people that have moved there.
Yes! Born and raised in Atlanta and still live here. Very similar experience, I met my boyfriend in college and we’re still together. But every single person I know is able to date without issue.
Correct I’m fortunate to be married but if I were to be single now in my 30s I would be out of options bc my generation in general have too many issues and I’m a burnout empath and I’m done healing people so I really don’t have that many friends people are friendly in the surface but if u don’t look like them it’s harder to make good friends. I managed to stay friends with my high school friends but struggled to gain anymore decent friends since for context
I don't know about these lists. I mean dating is one thing, I've been on plenty of dates but what happens after. I would prefer to see a list where black woman are happily married the most.
Born in Los Angeles, spent 10 yrs in NYC, now in Houston. Houston is by far the most promising place for me as far as dating, social life, and career advancement. I've spent the last 15 yrs of my life trying to achieve what I've done in 3 years so far in Houston
Wow! You look fantastic 🥰 the hair, the ombre colour, the swept to the side style, with the makeup and that top... Girl you look great! I love this look on you! Cute nails too! x
Thank you ❤️. This was like my favorite hair it’s a free tress something something I’ll have to look it up lol. But I wasn’t planning on likening it so much and I do!
Raleigh has A LOT of black male professionals from the ages of 20-45. The odds seem good enough, but ya know if you want to be treated a specific way then you still have to be particular. However the men are at least respectful and have relocated from variety of places so anyone's "type" of black man is here for sure.
@@cyn7993 I'm more referring to the Northwest area for clarification with the airport, rtp, and cary nearby. There are a lot of employment opportunities for well paying job. As far as being a woman here tho. There's not much to do.
I’m a Nurse Practitioner and lived in Waco (8 years) and DFW area (2 years). I had 3 boyfriends during this time after my divorce in 2012. I’m still single. But these last 2 years I have not felt the need to date so I stay to myself and am asexual. Good luck in finding true love ladies 🥰
one thing ill say is there is a difference between having a dating pool and having men who want to settle down. A lot of times, youll get a "good dating culture" which just means people who like casual dating with no aim to get married. So keep that in mind when it comes to the dating scene...my experience is ive never been somewhere where men didnt "date" black women, but all throughout the south you have a culture of men who wont commit to black women. thats the difference. best thing when it comes to love is looking at population. you are looking for a city where there are fewer women than men so that men feel they need to compete. cities tend to be bad because you get commitmentphobia as everyone feels they have hella options. so a suburb with more men than women in your best bet
well , i'm glad you've "never been somewhere where men didn't date Black women" , but um... i've been living in Los Angeles for over 5 years now and the vast majority of Black men quite actually do NOT "date" Black women.. i'm not using that as a figurative phrase.. i seriously mean it's rare to see Black men taking Black women on literal dates . it's not only that the Black men aren't committing here , they're not even pursuing you for a little fun as a Black woman
@@TeKeyaKrystal Same in Seattle, sis. I've been up and down the west coast and I've seen the same thing all throughout it it's very much a place where black men are hot commodity and they're highly coveted because not only do the black women want them but so do whites the Asians and Hispanics as well. They literally have their pick of the litter they don't have to date us whatsoever they have so many women of all races that want them. They don't even look in our direction because for them the options are abundant there. I see it every day. I would honestly advise any black women to stay away from the West Coast if you are looking for marriage but maybe visit and live there for a few years just to experience it.
As someone who grew up in Sugar Land, arc (outside of Houston) and moved to Hampton, Va, I completely agree with the 3 of the 7 cities listed ( Va Beach, Chesapeake and Hampton) it definitely gives but Hampton is a bit expensive rent wise but you get the comfort aspect. I think it’s the large military and higher education population here that contributes to this
Steph! These last few videos have been some of your best. Your voice and intention feels clear, confident, etc. Thank you for your content. Also, you have comedic gifts. Bring back the skits-- they are funny AF!!! I love the skits-hilarious!!!
I'm from the DMV, specifically Maryland, but close to DC. I'm only 21 so my dating experience isn't extensive, but it feels like a great place to find love at any age. Lots of colleges around, so good for young adults. Lots of popular companies so lots of working people to meet. I'm biased because I love it here, but I would def recommend. OMG AND GHANA MADE THE LIST? Sorry, proud Ghanaian over here 🇬🇭 Imma be honest with y'all though, if you're a straight woman, Ghana is not for you. Our men are messy and it's a very patriarchal country in terms of social dynamics. My own family members have discouraged me from marrying a Ghanaian. If you're any kind of LGBTQ+ and plan to date, don't. Speaking as a queer woman, Ghana is progressive in some aspects, but not that one.
Chicago ladies. I live here currently and I’m from here. The thing is you have to be OPEN to all races. There are a lot of non black men who dates Black Women. The thing w black men out here is they are not as colorist, I will say the colorism isn’t on 10 like a lot of others places. This is solely on DATING. As far as finically. I’m not sure. Dating only is the purpose of this comment.
Loved seeing your ad! First time i've seen one here; you're really good at making transitions and your speaking points seemed quite genuine. I'd like to support if you do more in the future!
Hi Steph, Excellent Broadcast! I really Appreciate the Journalistic aspect coupled with your commentary. Refreshing change of pace! I’m from DC, It’s really a really good place move if you can afford, and you want an above average dating pool date. Watch out Folks, Washington DC can be very Finicky and cliquish. Washingtonians feel like they have a standard to uphold! LOL! So the competition is fierce! Black Women are really handling their business, in the DMV, in a good way. Good guys are checking. So much to choose from, for both women and men. It not just the District of Columbia, it the whole DMV!All the Best! 🥰
I’m an outdoorsy Mississippi native black woman that loves diversity in culture yet a really calm conservative community life. I reside in Atlanta, and I hate it. It’s too flashy, fast, materialistic & countercultural. The women hear are STRUGGLING, I hear conversations about not being able to find men to date and artificial insemination more than I’m comfortable with. I can’t speak personally, but from the plethora of black women here that are educated and financially secure, Atlanta is definitely not it. They are balancing either men who have no aims at commitment or bi/homosexuals. I’ve traveled to many places in the states and if I were in this situation seeking relationship, I would focus on a midsized cities- my favorites being Bend, OR, Birmingham, AL, Nashville, TN, Asheville, NC. The positive community culture is definitely represented in its citizens. The men there have been so much more traditional in dating than what I’ve seen in LA, ATL, Houston, Dallas and NY.
I also live in Atlanta and moved here from Nashville, TN. I completely agree with your comment. I find the dating scene and just living in this city to be completely exhausting.
Okay I so can relate! Outdoorsy, Mississippi gal myself. Been here in Atlanta 7 years and dating here is horrible! Scam capital for sure. Men are looking for women as a come-up, bi, HOBOsexual and so much more. 0/10 don't recommend Atlanta for a single, childless woman that are financially secure.
I’m a black woman who lives in Az! I absolutely love it here! I’ve always found good employment, dated some pretty nice men… Been with my bf for 2 years…Cost of living is going up but that’s everywhere. Weather is great, the community I live in is great. Great outdoor activities! I have no complaints honestly…
@@tonyarobinson7284 I will always recommend the East Valley. So anything East of Phoenix. Scottsdale, Chandler, East Mesa and Gilbert are great options. You’ll be 15 to 20 min from downtown Phoenix. Great schools, employment, housing, dining and community.
Atlanta was fun, great for dating interesting, creative black men but also a lot of bummy men (no job, no car, no clue). DC was the best for dating educated men, but some of them were very egotistical and prioritized work over building a relationship. My boyfriend and I met in DC (dating apps). We’ve been together for two years now and recently moved to NYC together, so I would say DC is the best for black single women. NYC seems like a fun place to date, there’s so many date options here and people who just want to have a good time, but I’ve also seen and heard a lot of triflingness. I also dated in Pittsburgh, a bunch of weirdos but also the best, nicest personalities out there. I also experienced more interracial dating in Pittsburgh and DC (if you’re into that).
When I lived in Chicago , I went on a lot of dates. Some high earners and some not. However, I never had a legit relationship. Dating was easy in Chicago compared to Nashville. I thought moving south would expose me to black men who wanted families and marriage. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case. The black men here are huge on interracial dating, love 50/50 , and to be honest do not want to live around African Americans. The only good thing about Nashville is the churches, although I’m single my church always has something going on for all ages. I do see myself meeting my husband in Nashville. The white men here are really nice and quick to speak to you .
Yeap it’s worst in the south contrary to belief. I lived in the south most of my life and I lived on off in Ohio and had more luck in 6 months then I had in Atlanta (I know ATLANTA is bad bad in dating. I moved there for school). In 7 years!!
@@C_theesiren lol! I oh yeah? Well tell that to my NYC relatives who moved there and they sure will tell you a totally opposite story. One actually made a joke and said a BW where they moved ain't got a chance cause too BM down there want WW.
Your advice in the last five minutes of the "my heart was broken at friendsgiving" video was ON POINT. Everyone should take heart to your advice there. You will know if he is going to do _______ when he does _______. That goes for ANYONE we spend way too much time worrying when people are going to do what they are going to do-or not. LOL. Anyway we have no power over it and waste our time worrying. That resonated with me so deply. Thank you
I think Houston is right to go on this list. There's a lot of Black men here, and Black men that I have dated have said they exclusively seek out Black women to date, which already is a step ahead Black men living in many other cities.
Yeah I had a good experience dating in Houston as well… I’m back in south Florida (where I’m from) and it’s decent too There’s a lot of options down here BUT there’s still a lot of men who want and date black women especially in Broward
I live in the DMV area and honestly I don’t plan to move anywhere outside of these areas. I’m originally from DC and I know that dating here is rough. I went to school is Maryland (Howard county) and often ran into men who came from great backgrounds. I see lots of professional looking men walking the streets in Baltimore as well.
I think it’s hard to date in Chicago If you don’t live down town or in the north side . A lot of parts in the south side and east side are so dangerous and hard to get around in Chicago. You can strive In down town and up north with dating but the rent is soooo expensive and living is too much . I had to move cause I was barely making ends meet.
THIS IS ALSO VERY TRUE!!!! I keep trying to tell people, it is like the Jim Crow South! It's awful. But, when you grow up there it feels normal. Not until I moved somewhere else did I realize how bad Chicago's racial segregation is! That said, it's still a pretty phenomenal city to live in. It has a lot going for it. I'd definitely move back.
Yes growing up there I was never around anybody else but Latinos and blck people. I wanted to be around a more diverse group. I moved to Cincinnati like 2 years ago and it’s the complete opposite here. Everyone mingles and there are SO many mixed people! I don’t think Ive ever seen this many mixed people in one place before lol
I wish I had considered my mating options as well when picking a college. I went to school in Iowa LOL. If you're a black girl in high school and watching this, also factor in what you would like socially, not only academically, when picking a place to go for college.
Yes. Not enough emphasis on that bc people want young women to just focus on their studies but college is a great pace to learn who you are romantically too.
This!!! I graduated from FSU so it was plenty of dating options plus FAMU is literally 5 minutes away but I felt like most of the guys didn’t have anything to offer (which was an immature mistake because ofc they didn’t have anything yet…) I really should have taken relationships more seriously in college because afterwards is slim pickings 🙄🤦🏽♀️😐
Personally I really like the Phoenix area. I’m also a bit on the conservative side. But think it depends on what is important to you and what you are looking for. I think the area in AZ makes a difference too. As well as age range. If you are more settled, Arizona is nice and chill. But I must admit I also lived there when I was 22 (38 now) while active duty military and loved the club scene as well. There were some nice spots, although of course nothing like Houston or something. But still cool. I was in shock when I moved from there to the New Orleans area and realized I enjoyed it more in AZ. I also dated a lot living in Phoenix as well. Especially interracial dating. Latino men of course. But honestly dating is no longer at the top of my priority list so I’m not much help in giving advice in that area. All in all, it’s personal choice, your own experience, and again, what’s important to you. Way out the pros and cons for what YOU need before making a move. I honestly never been one to do what every else does just because. The rare times I have done that, I was miserable. 🤷🏾♀️. But I enjoyed the video! This was an interesting topic. Plus I love the comment section and reading everyone else’s experiences and advice❤️
Ok so I am 28 and I live IN Atlanta and have been here about a year. I love it because there are many events and things to do being a tourist city . It’s easy to find a man here but they are not of quality . You either get a bum user or a financially stable pompous “ I’m the prize” type . And with them they put so much pressure on you to look a certain way to maintain their image . They are very shallow. So don’t judge me I gave up on dating and decided to get into the sugar baby type of lifestyle and Atlanta is good for that material type of women . It is like lounges , designer, bbl type of thing going on here in atl . So in this culture It’s very hard to get serious with a guy because once you get into a fight once he will move on to someone else because they are a ton of women here . Atlanta is also huge on polygamy. I can be in the talking stage with someone, and out of the blue he’s asking about 3 somes and sister wives . Its not real poly , you just get desperate women willing to share their man to keep him or men using poly as a cover up for a sex addiction . It’s honestly very messy and men know they are allowed to be trash and will still have plenty of options unfortunately. I don’t see myself living here long term unless I move to away from the city . I have briefly lived in Houston and I did date quite a bit there some very nice guys and I liked it I could see being able to get serious with someone there but I wasn’t there long to sustain . Atlanta is just good for black businesses, networking, medical field , nightlife but not dating .
Girrrrlll, tell me about it! Been in Atlanta for YEARS now. The DECEIT among these men is real.. the emotional availability and maturityis SPARSE. They are literally confused when you tell them your are not sharing.. I've overstayed my visit, time to GO. Would you say that the Houston men are more marriage minded?
As an “alternative” black women who’s traveled and lived all over the states and out of the country I recommend North Dakota (any major city) and Denver. Other than that visit other countries and see what feels like home for me it was China (unfortunately can’t go there), South Africa, & Guatemala. P.S. I’m from California
Michigan really is a great state for black women, well, southeast Michigan at least, haha. I lived in Southfield, MI for a number of years and it is a great city for black women. I’m not surprised it’s #1 as it’s right outside of Detroit. Lots of culture, food, and fun. If you can handle cold winters, come on over 😂
I came here to say that! I live in Detroit. When I saw Southfield, I thought, That completely tracks. Having lived in Minneapolis-St. Paul, MN for a couple of years, I'm quite used to winters here. #DownCoatsAreAThing Now, this area of the country for love? Can't say, but I'm also not looking. 🤷🏿🤷🏿🤷🏿🤷🏿
I’m in Detroit and I agree. I love it here. Not only is it the Blackest (percentage wise) city in america. We are diverse in our Blackness, people are down-to-earth, kind, damn near everyone has their own business and we are thriving - thriving.
I met my husband in Atlanta and had a robust dating life before I met my husband. I will say I always dated from the global village. If you limit yourself to BM, you are setting yourself up for very long dry spells.
I’m a black woman born and raised in Arizona. I’m 27 and recently single after a 4 year relationship. So now I’m trying to start over and I hate Arizona. It’s hot, it’s boring, and there no natural water which I don’t like. I want to move out of here by the time I’m 30 I just really need to work 2 jobs save and start planning. I’m glad I came across this video! Thank you😊😊
I’m mixed and ambiguous from the west coast (California and AZ)and i feel like black men don’t want to date even mixed women lol.They’ll entertain but will “fall in love” with a Latina,Asian,or white women first.It’s all good..date out!Date who wants to date you if you’re into them…quite frankly,i don’t see black men getting married or wanting to get married as much as other men do anyways,and marriage is important to me.
If we are speaking only about dating (casual, get-to-know you, grab dinner) I had a ball in Houston. I met so many men- some who I am still good friends with to this day! But marriage & love in Houston? yikes. Now I live in New York and well...everything you've heard is true. But I will say this- as a woman, there is a certain assertiveness you need to have to meet men on the East coast IRL. The whole eye contact, speak first thing is real because if you don't- a lot of these men will literally not even notice you. Not because you aren't beautiful or engaging but because there are soo many more women:men here.
I’ve lived in Miami and Minneapolis MN. MIAMI PROS is there is a large community of young professionals but dating here as a black woman is hard because it is very superficial and everyone here is a 10/10. It’s also hard to date if you are not Caribbean because it is very segregated and people usually stay within their racial/ethnic group. MINNEAPOLIS is cute but very small. The winters are bad but the summers and fall is to die for. Minnesota is very white and dating here as a black woman will only work if you like white men (it is pretty rare to find a black man who openly date black women. Even light skin women). I am from Minneapolis is it will always be home but I hope this helps someone!
As someone from Minneapolis, if you are a black immigrant or the child of a black immigrant it will be easier for you to date other black people because the black immigrant community here is close.
Love the transition to your sponsorship girl 😂 I just like who likes me. I live in Michigan and I believe I’m flourishing. Just bought my first home and I have a good job 😊 I will never move somewhere for love…
Virginia Beach, Hampton, and Chesapeake are all very close to each other, basically a county. And in my experience the success is probably attributed to the military. Military, military, military area. Many Black women (not all) have success because they are either enlisted, retired or married to someone enlisted. The 2 benefits from the military most used are healthcare and 0 down payment on homes. So many, many black homeowners with stable financial situations here. I live in the area and really like it for my family. Va Beach has good public schools, is diverse and is not too “Southern” because so many people from all over the country/world live here due to the military.
I’m a 757 native, from Portsmouth and currently live about 20 minutes away from Va Beach. I’ve lived in Morgantown, WV for grad school for 2 years and NYC for almost 2 years before the pandemic hit, which caused me to relocate back here in VA. I agree on the huge pool of military men and women, however I do not 100% agree with Va Beach being a great place to live, due to the long outstanding history of racism ( I meant let’s not forget Something in the Water’s relocation in DC because the city’s non sense of urgency for injustice of a black man innocent life taken by a Va Beach cop). There has been little to some strides but as a native with friends and family that have either worked or lived in VA beach, I would give it a 5/10 for Black women to thrive. This is not me bragging at all or bashing a preference of stability/lifestyle over the other. I figured I would present my two cents being I came from a big city to back home. Before I worked in the position I have now (remote, federal government, salary on the higher end ), the pay is not super grand (60-65k average) which isn’t horrible but it’s not going to give you big city lifestyle dollars. Dating pool for me has been so so. You won’t find a lot of men in tech or working at a huge financial/government firm, outside of the shipyard, but there are men who are long shoremens, merchant seamens, etc., but I see it as long as one manages their money well, lives within their means and has good credit you can’t go wrong. A lot of men are into getting married and establishing families here with a huge concentration in faith based relationships. Nightlife isn’t the best. I’m not a clubber but I love lounges. Everything closes at midnight or1am here and most of the DJ’s suck. Depending on which event/party you go to and who you know, there are a few gems here to find. Networking events are always happening and mom and pop restaurants are everywhere. If you’re vegan, the options to eat have been expanding these past few years. However, above all of that I can say living and affordable decent housing is pretty feasible. I live in a luxury appt with cable, internet, washer and dryer included in my rent and pay less than $1600. I’m responsible for water, sewage, electric, heat but that’s still not bad in my opinion. A good amount of folks in our age group 30+ invest in houses. I would keep going but I feel like I would want some others to chime in before I continue. Just my thoughts but over all it’s not a terrible place to live for home ownership and affordability. I would encourage one to travel a lot like I do to your fav cities/areas if you still want that city energy/nightlife/eclecticism/overall diverse culture that some cities offer .
The thing with California is you need to know people who are from California to get the experience. I grew up in California so I know where to go, friends, etc. People who move to California will always have a different experience unless they make a Friend who knows a friend to bring you in. Otherwise your experience will be really limited. Sorry to say that.
Interesting! I actually live near Southfield and I think it’s a great area for black women too. Many companies in the area have high numbers of black people (and women) in leadership roles. Most of my black girl friends are married (and to a black man!) and own a home or on the path to doing so. Southfield neighbors Detroit, which is 75% black. During the economic challenges, many black people who were financially able to leave left Detroit and relocated right next door to Southfield. It’s a pretty nice suburban community with a lot of green space and room to spread out. And it’s 10 minutes from several nice downtowns, like royal oak, Ferndale, Detroit, Birmingham, etc. So a lot to do! The only downside to me is that the taxes can be high and the schools could be better. But cost of living Is much better than most of the country.
I live in Miami, its very nice in terms of area and night life but dating on the other hand is not so good, most men aren't ready to settle down and its demographic is mainly hispanics and most hispanics stick to their race its very challenging IN the dating aspect and also the living expenses are extremely HIGH
@@itsniquenique45 Yes! I’ve grown up in Miami, lived in Fort Lauderdale and Pompano Beach on the intercostal. Rarely do black men approach me. It’s always been European, Hispanic, Israeli or men from the Midwest that pursue me.
@@itsniquenique45 I live there and yes they are, but most are not residents and want green cards. Also, as diverse as Miami is there is still a stigma with dating bw. It's secretly frowned upon. I Rarely see bw- nonbm couples. Also, I've had to stop dating latn men when they tell me their family wouldn't accept them being with a bw. Also, they love to use bw for sx. I've dated 2 that were married and lied. With the bm it's very hard because I don't meet too many who are doing well for themselves. No shade to them but I hardly meet bm who went to college or have something going for themselves. It's very annoying. Plus the good ones are taken or looking for nonbw for the most part.
Agree 💯percent, most of the Black men in Miami are not interested in settling down for marriage. Lots of cohabitation and “baby mama” culture, not many young Black professional, married, and economically thriving Black couples here! The cost of living is also very high due to foreigners driving up the housing market. The pay for jobs is also below par in comparison to the COL. Most people in that Pembroke Pines and Miramar suburb area are two-income couples. The cost of homes and apartment rentals are very high! The cost of car insurance in the South Florida area is also very expensive.
As a black man I can't really speak on black women experiences (I'll have to ask my 2 sisters) but I was really surprised to see Virginia on the list a few times. I live in Virginia Beach which is in the area called the Tidewater area. Chesapeake and Hampton Virginia are all within 20 to 40 minutes away from each other. Alexandria Virginia is in the northern part of Virginia and is where the more wealthy tend to live. Lot of good jobs there. You see Alexandria in movies a lot because it is right outside of Washington DC. And since DC is also on the list, I guess it would reason to say that living in Alexandria will put you within 20 minutes of DC. So there is one of the best places for black women to live and one of the best romance places right next to each other.
Surprised why? 6 of the 10 wealthiest Black zip codes in Virginia are in Hampton Roads. The 757 is the fourth Blackest metro over 1.5 million in the US behind Memphis, New Orleans, and Atlanta. And Hampton Roads is third behind DC area and Baltimore area for Black households over $100k. Not to mention NSU, Hampton U, TCC trade school, and even ODU, which is a “white school” is 30% Black. I don’t think certain people know how to use HR because they worry about “hype” and attention too much. Even VA Beach is 20% Black…by contrast Oakland is only 29% Black, but certain people think of Oakland as some super Black place. VA Beach is atleast surrounded by Norfolk, Chesapeake, Hampton etc…all very Black.
Come to DC Stephco! Just started the video but I’ve lived in multiple cities in the country and the DMV area is definitely the best place to be a black woman. Amazing opportunities, AMAZING BLACK MEN WHO LOVE BLACK WOMEN!!!!!, a very supportive black affluent community and stuff to do. 😄
I live in Florida. I totally agree it’s not a good state at all for black women, especially a dark skinned woman like me. I lived in Pompano years ago. I’m now in my rural hometown. I’m making the best of it with my family but I’m becoming desperate to move!
Dallas native here. I’m married but I can say a few of my single friends are having difficulties dating here. But I know plenty of people who have met their spouse here. My brother in law moved here some years back and met his soon to be wife almost immediately. They’re getting married in October. The DFW area is known as the place you come to settle down. But recently there have been a lot of transplants so I’m not sure how it is now.
I do not think Black women should move to predominantly Black areas. 1. For our safety 2. If we want to get married 3. discrimination of Black women. I think this would be a horrible idea
@WHITES LOVE MY PLAYLISTS reposting same message still? data shows your a white supremacist, I've seen your Playlist ( Adolf Hitler channel along with other white nationalist idealogies)
@@brwnhilarybanks9953 Fully agree. I wish more women would stop "warning" them. They're a lost cause. Let them get their lace fronts split at this point and let them continuously search all over the globe for their "kings" until their feet bleed. I'm honestly having a good laugh at a lot of these comments since it's a slow day at work. Suggesting that women all relocate to some of the most dangerous cities in the country just to find a single "unicorn" blk male is the sickest most pathetic thing I've ever heard, and keep in mind some of these women have children while suggesting moving into warzones to find males who are at the bottom socioeconomically. This is why nobody takes blk women seriously lol. It's insane how oblivious they are. These women are single for a VERY good reason.
I agree with Chicago. Granted, Chicago is fairly segregated but that is due to historical redlining. It’s becoming less segregated these days. As a black woman, I’ve personally been winning in Chicago professionally and in the love department. It is a bit humid, so the hair be hairing😂
New Rochelle is my hometown! No one has heard of it lol. So glad to see it mentioned in a positive light, especially for black women! I honestly had no idea.
Interesting video. I’ve really never thought my geographical location would determine my mating choices, but more so my career choice/field has because as a professional, I spend so much time “careering.” I chose education as a career field and though I make a very generous salary as an executive, it is a female dominated field from top to bottom so rarely do I meet eligible men and the ones that are, know they are rare so they are like kids in a candy store at conferences, conventions, symposiums, etc. However my female friends who are in male dominated fields ie engineering, tech, aviation, military, the medical field (working in hospitals every day all day with doctors), law, pharmaceutical sales (hell sales period) in general are minorities in those male dominated career fields. We’re in our 40’s and they are rarely dateless, and some are married to men (who, by the way, at minimum are their equal salary wise, which is an issue professional/high earning black women have to contend with in finding a mate) in those fields because the every day almost all day proximity to men will most likely attract somebody’s son to you beyond just the superficial stuff that occurs when you meet people on dating apps. Recent examples: In the past 2 yrs I’ve had at least 3 nurse friends (in their 40’s so don’t believe the hitting the wall crap) to marry (1 remarried) doctors (2 of them) and one an anesthesiologist and they all met them in some kind of work related capacity. One engineering friend just dumped her 6 figure engineer boyfriend 3-4 months ago, and she already has another 6 figure engineer boyfriend in no time that she met out on an assignment. She’s a lovely woman who has phenotypical African American features, skin tone and hair texture so this shows that regardless of what society says, Blk women do have options if they position themselves where the options are. In all, these are average looking women and would not be considered as Instagram model or even trophy wife types at all, but it is something to be said about how people just grow on you organically when you’re around them all the time as you would naturally be in a work related capacity. I followed my heart with my career choice, but looking back maybe I should’ve followed my head considering how daunting and fruitless meeting dating app strangers can be these days. I would say to younger women to please think about your career choice and your college major because you’re sure to find single men in male dominated majors even more so than in the work world. Your college days and career/work are the two significant areas where you’re gonna spend a great deal of your life so at least choose one that has an equal ratio of men and women but strongly consider male dominated fields. You can possibly kill two birds with one stone by having a good and lucrative (since male dominated industries pay more) career and increase your odds/chances of meeting a suitable mate while doing what you love.
I worked as a Pharma sales rep in NJ and Long Island for 10 Years from my mid twenties to early thirties and despite the industry and clients being male-dominated, during my entire career I was “set-up” on 1 date….80-90% of the men were already married and those that were single were players
Everything you said was SPOT ON! Men hardly ever venture outside of their bubble for mates, provided they aren't on dating apps. The women in male dominated fields have the advantage of proximity.
@@Jenna1394 you’re right because the women I know in those industries say something to the same effect that you shared about guys not venturing outside of their comfort zone much. Plus work consumes most professionals so even the few free weekend days you have, who has the energy and time to go out mate hunting? Most guys too lazy and/or lack the confidence to do that for fear of rejection. The meaningful relationships I had came from opportunities where I spent a lot of time in incubator or frequent interaction type settings like work (definitely not in my same department though. I would strongly caution against that) and college. Those aren’t contrived environments like going on dates with strangers and having to work to get to know them which is another job in and of itself. Then to add, you’re competing with a catalog of other dating app women and I just don’t have the energy or time for that. At work and in college, people tend to show more of their natural self with time and often times you just click as you naturally get to know them and they get to know you as you’re spending so much time at a place where you both have to be instead of keep having to constantly plan, coordinate time and space for togetherness. That takes work bIn fact that’s how I met the guy who I once was madly in love with, but now we’re best friends in business. I once had an experience being in a male dominated environment and it was like heaven on earth lol. When i was younger, I used to work in the cafeteria of an all male college and I never worried about finding someone to date because the guys were always showing interest incessantly. I do mean Always. In fact, that environment kinda made me believe that I had all the time in the world to meet a man because they were plentiful. Even going to Spelman college (an all female college), we could take classes at Morehouse (an all male college) and I would take classes as much as I could at Morehouse because I earned my college credits and met several men to date through the years of being there and after. At any rate, I could go on and on about this. Although i have no plans to change my career I will say that if I knew then what I know now, my career would’ve been curated much differently. That’s for sure lol.
I really hope this is the case for me… I’m in the engineering field and I feel like a sore thumb compared to the other women I’ve worked with (typical blond hair white blue eyed ladies). But I will say the guys that I work with truly have my back and I’m so grateful for that. I really hope I meet the one. I’m early into my career field. Next year my company will be sending me to Sacramento CA or Guam. Fingers crossed 😅
I recently had an interesting experience with New York. So I live in San Jose, California, in the heart of Silicon Valley and I’ve been using dating apps for about 5 months. On average, I get 4 or 5 likes on Bumble a day. I traveled to New York early August and about 2 hours after landing in New York, I got about 200 likes on Bumble. I was a bit confused by the sudden influx of likes until I checked the settings on Bumble and realized my location has been changed from San Jose to New York. I didn’t go on any dates while in New York but it was certainly eye-opening to see the dramatic increase in potential dates just going to New York
Chicago isn’t a bad place to date…as long as you’re opened to dating outside your race…BUT my bf is black, and from Chicago, but it took a minute for me to find him 🙃
Elk Grove Ca is in south of Sacramento, I visited a couple of times and I loved it so much! and I hardly can speak about this topic because I came to the US already married. but yes Elk Grove for the win❤️
Um, I’m from Springfield mass… and let me say as soon as I could afford to move away…. I did. It’s a okay place for maybe be when your older and can get far way from the more impoverished areas (which spans pretty wide if you ask me). I moved to nyc at the age of 23 and found my husband there at the age of 27. While it’s an unlikely place for love I feel there’s more opportunities due to the influx of different types of people and activities to meet those people. Only problem is money is funny there if your not rich.
If you lived in Burbank, you where only 30 minutes from Inglewood. I’m born and raised in Los Angeles, I’m a Navy Veteran and I’ve lived all over the US and world. My best experience has been Hollywood Ca, Sherman Oaks, Ca, Miami, Fl and Las Vegas. Currently I live in Las Vegas and the dating here has been good for me. And financially I’m much better off here than LA. You look gorgeous, love the hair on you🌸
One of my best friends is born and raised in AZ and she always complains about the dating there for black women. She says they consider biracial women “black girls” and full black women get ignored 😭
Spent my first year of college in arizona, moved back home and was diagnosed with major depressive disorder. It wasn’t all bad but going from living in a super diverse city in california to being one of like 10 visibly black people i saw that entire year was extremely jarring
Born and raised in LA and have lived here my entire life. I’ve love it here and enjoy a great quality of life. The Californian cities that are listed in this video are dives. Who in the heck did they poll for this? I’m guessing they made the cut because they have a reasonable cost of living in comparison to the actual cool cities such as LA, San Francisco, Santa Barbara, Pasadena, Beverly Hills, Berkeley, Santa Cruz, and Santa Monica.
I grew up Southern California,went to school in Gardena until highschool,we moved to the OC…all those cities are NOT it Lmaoo..palmdale?!Riverside???Hell no!!😂😂
As an ATLien, I do not recommend dating here. The people are superficial, no one wants love, honestly. Your "man" will be at a club or party every night so you'll be in a relationship by yourself.
Definitely don't move to ATL if your looking for love. I've been here since 2017 and been single ever since. I've dated had a 10 month relationship but yeah don't bother. If you are poly or into hookup culture this might be the place for you. Monogamy has no home here lol
That’s the List based on that site! I disagree with NY and Atl. Everyone is moving to Houston and Dallas area so idk about that regarding competition factor. I believe in reality the list for black women is small, but if you get the beauty brains and brand game up, the list can expand.
Grew up in the DFW Texas area. Currently living in Irving, Tx to be close to my job. After working from home for the past 3 years, I can say that it’s changing a lot, but I love living here in Irving/Las Colinas
Grew up here too in within the DFW. Las Calinas is super nice, I’m partial to Mansfield, midloathian that kind of area or even Fort Worth. I would say it’s fairly diverse you just got to know where to hang within Dallas and Fort Worth
As a BW, I concur with the data surrounding Pittsburgh, PA being the WORST city for BW! Even having 2 undergraduate & 1 Master’s degree, bought a home in a nearby suburb when I was 24, & a lack-luster career, I’m probably no better off than I was 10 years ago! It’s HELLA RACIST, NEPOTISM is so blatant & even though we have some of THE BEST Healthcare in the world, black woman are neglected at ASTOUNDING Rates. So Long story short- RUN BLACK WOMEN RUN!!!!
Southfield Michigan was great 20 years ago. In college I met so many middle class black people who were from Southfield. I visited friends homes and thought the city was amazing. So many high earning black people. After graduating I lived there for about 5 years but had to leave because of the crazy increase in crime. Most people I know moved to neighboring cities to escape the crime.
I sometimes only come on here to see your hair. Love the fun styles you rock. Ok now going to listen bc I especially come for your thoughtful commentary 😃
Please feel free to add your two cents below! I want to know the best cities and I'm sure others do too!
I'm 32, Congolese🇨🇩, born and raised in Paris France🇨🇵 moved in Toronto Canada 🇨🇦in 2019 and...the dating scene sucks! Men wanna hook up, be pen pal, be friends, don't take initiatives it's so exhausting.. so I've asked my French friends how is it out there and they told me it's not better so I don't even know if it's worth it moving back to Paris. I think the problem may be geographical but also generational 😕
@@ForMySoulSistas I am French but never lived in Paris.... I would tend to think that French people can be quite 'traditionnal' as in wanting to actually be in a stable relationship... But I don't know...
However I believe French can be 'racist' as in white date white and aren't always used to diversity outside of Paris or outside of big cities in general. There are exceptions of course
Sub saharan african countries . Lots of black men there.
@WHITES LOVE MY PLAYLISTS reposting same message still?
data shows your a white supremacist, I've seen your Playlist ( Adolf Hitler channel along with other white nationalist idealogies)
Chicago is a really good city to date. I met my husband here and I think it’s a great place to live.
Some of those Texas cities listed like Tyler and Grand Prairie are hella racist. WOULD NOT recommend as a Texan.
I agree. Who made this list up? I’m a Texas native too.
Tyler yes I would not recommend ! But Grand Prairie is really nice for black women. It’s very diverse.. as a Texan, Texas is a racist state in general but a lot of black people live here and thrive here
As someone new to the area, the dating pool here is actually pretty good
Love my hometown Tyler,Texas.. it depends on the person and who you know I guess
Texas here. I recommend no one come here.
someone i know once described NYC as being like real life Tinder and it couldnt be any more true. The problem is that everyone has ‘options’. It’s kind of like endless pieces of cake. No one here is ever ready to commit and if you find someone here that is, they’ve probably said the same to 3 other people 🤦🏾♀️
@WHITES LOVE MY PLAYLISTS I don’t agree with this. The best place is where the standard of beauty is black women. Supply and demand doesn’t really apply to the dating market. Living in some rural village as the only blk person doesn’t make you more attractive
Yeah, London is like that too 😔
I think the DMV (DC, Maryland, Virginia) is like that too.
That's scary TINDER IRL 😒 y'all gone make me buy my husband something expensive and that he don't need but really want just because I appreciate the fact that he ain't like these mofos in these streets, I'm giving God all the glory right now for that man ... I don't know how Stephco topics draw me into this BS all the time when I'm not even her target audience but it's just so fascinating
hahahaha , the "no one is ever ready to commit b/c there's so many options it makes ppl think there's always something better out there" part hits the nail on the head for where I live in Los Angeles (directly between Beverly Hills and DTLA)
I'm 31, Congolese🇨🇩, born and raised in Paris France🇨🇵 moved in Toronto Canada 🇨🇦in 2019 and...the dating scene sucks! Men wanna hook up, be pen pals, be friends, don't take initiatives it's so exhausting.. so I've asked my French friends how is it out there and they told me it's not better so I don't even know if it's worth it moving back to Paris. I think the problem may be geographical but also generational 😕
32 ❗️You have less than 30 years before you die.
I think you should move back to Paris and date outside of your race.
Same EXACT thing in the Mid-Atlantic.. I was just complaining about the pen pal thing with my friends today!!!!
Please explain more on the pen pal thing… I thought pen pals was something you did with children in other countries or prisoners maybe 🤷🏽♀️ It’s a relationship alternative now??
@@ShaniZaki17713 I could be wrong, but I'm assuming it's not a literal pen pal. But someone who just wants to text instead of actually dating in real life.
If number 1 is Atlanta, then I'm just gonna ignore the rest of the list.
😂😂😂💯💯💯💯
seriously I hate it here...so over it
EXACTLY 😆
Facts…
Yeah. I had to press on for the sake of the video but…damn.
A good to realize is someone else's experience wouldn't always be your own. Life hands us different cards. Just because other black women found success or love in a city doesn't guarantee you would. So I'd advise you not to move for unless you have a concrete reason to, or you just might end up getting disappointed.
Absolutely. One persons paradise could be your hell. Absolutely.
did you not watch the video in its entirety ? that's EXACTLY what she explained at the end
@WHITES LOVE MY PLAYLISTS curious.
@@TeKeyaKrystal no. Ppl comment before listening
AZ born and raised! I can confirm dating as a black woman is extremely difficult ESPECIALLY if you prefer dating black men. Growing up, it’s not uncommon for black boys to bully us black girls for skin tone, hair texture etc :( Also other races seem to overly fetishize me instead of date seriously - most of the guys here prefer Mexican and white women for long term relationships. I never felt good enough my whole life and I constantly struggle with self esteem! My advice if you live in an area like this and you can’t move: Date guys that are not from where you live!!!! My current boyfriend is from the mid-west - been in AZ for a year or so when we met. To be loved by a black man that prefers sisters and embraces my 4C hair and doesn’t mind if my skin tans in the summer feels like a fairytale for me lol
@Hails I’m Az born and raised too. I agree with a lot of your experience growing up here. As I got older I found that I had to date black men who were from the Midwest, East Coast or South. My bf of 2 years is from the Midwest. I really love Az tho… it has really offered me great employment, a great community to raise my son and just overall a place where I feel accepted for the most part. As a dark skinned woman I believe that anywhere I live I will be not the “preferred” choice by the masses but I’ve never had an issue with dating and meeting quality men who do prefer me.
I lived in AZ for a few years and loved it!
Happy for you ❤️❤️
Very sad that you perceive black men like that. If most of them don’t care for sisters why only date black men? Doesn’t make sense and seems limiting.
@@hails9299 She didn't say having a preference for BM is a bad thing, just that it is limiting.
So I will say New York is great for dating. Men here actually like black women BUT if you’re looking for marriage, 2 1/2 kids with the white picket fence, there’s not a lot of that going on here. I honestly think people are either really distracted by the abundance of choice OR they’re burdened by the cost of living and less likely to feel comfortable settling down in that way. Not a lot of weddings happening here. You might get a boyfriend you could split rent with though
True, I lived in NYC for a few years. Great place to meet people, but not the best to form lifelong connections.
I’m married in NYC and love it. NYC has 3 groups: immigrants, transient grifters from Kansas, Utah, California etc and a tight circle of generational New Yorkers.
It’s a hard social circle to crack. And it’s based on knowing someone who knows someone who knows someone’s cousin.
I met my husband in New York City.
@@Morenita570 Also married in NYC. I have so many opinions I don't even know where to start! lol
As a native NYer yes it is very easy to date here....especially if you have the PG factor. However, if you want to marry and stay or upgrade to a certain class level it's highly competitive and you will be competing with women of ALL races.
Just moved from Virginia Beach 🏝 to the DMV a couple months ago. Virginia Beach is a good place to live for black women.. but the dating options are terrible! It’s near a large naval military base, so the guys just want to hook up or the local dusties will try to pursue you. So far, dating in the DMV has been fun. Loving it so far. I’m 27 and moved to this area to find love and a great career! Wish me luck ladies 😆
Good luck!! Be mercenary and date with intent.
One wrong move - cut ‘‘em off!!
Avoid military like the plague lol. But seriously good luck.
Good luck honey bunny!
Very true. I live in Hampton,Va which is 30 min away from va beach. Everything you said was true but the diversity here is great and I experienced way less racism compared to my home state of Cali. Also, the Hampton roads area and DMV is great for black women who like dating non black men. I’ve seen more black women with non black men than the other way around. My husband is military but he is from the Midwest. There are ALOT of singles out here who aren’t military but may come from military families. They seem to be good options and wealth is definitely accounted for in their families. Also, many people get out of the military here and leave but the ones who stay are typically looking to settle down. I’ve had the best dating experiences here and the DMV.
Welcome boo!! 😘
I've lived in Alexandria, VA for almost a year now and it's great. As a New Yorker it's a change of pace, but if i want some city life (without as many people/pollution) Washington D.C is only a 15 min drive away. There's lots to do in the area, it is safe, and diverse. Jobs do pay well here if you have the education or experience. This is the most stable I've been in a while. The price of living is not cheap though, damn near New York prices but I can't even get lamb over rice at 12am here because everything is closed..
As far as dating goes, I haven't been actively dating so I can't really elaborate.
I was born and raised there, for dating and social life I did better in DC than in Northern VA.
Thank you for this, I moved out to VA Beach from NY and as a dental assistant, they pay shit out here. I thought my experience counted but I guess not lmao looking on indeed, Alexandria pays the same as NY. You saved my ass fr 😂
I second this. Love the NOVA/DMV area.
Alexandria Virginia is my home. I had a lot of fun and did well dating in NOVA. I met my husband however in Baltimore.
I love traveling to D.C. from Hampton roads area. I always enjoy myself. Alexandria in the fall is so cozy and I love their old towne downtown area. So many different restaurants and the vibe was nice. The people were nicer than those in D.C. and the men were friendly too.
This comment section is golden. So informative. Thanks Stephanie! 💚
After reading all the comments I really think That article was talking about demographics. It's basically just saying because black people live there you have a chance to thrive and date. It's racist at best. Just because a man is black and a woman is black doesn't automatically Mean you are compatible. The income part is because you may have high earnings because there are more black women in that area.
the women in these comments are in for a nice Surprise in a few years if they don't get their head out their asses.
This is so true ! My friend Folashade Mordi was shoot and killed in Chicago this year. She was actually from the suburbs and went to see her bf in Chicago on her damn birthday and was killed that night 😭 idk why they would recommend a dangerous place. SMH .
Hoooow is that racist??
@@C_theesiren I’m curious if the person who wrote the article thinks that way. Look at what everyone one is saying. Some of the areas have high crime rates. How do you thrive when you are afraid of walking down the street? Thriving is not just about money. So what the article is suggesting is stay around your own. I’m sorry I don’t buy into that. The racist part is, it’s just compiling a list of high demographics of black people. To me that’s segregation. It’s not new, I just won’t live like that.
But Pennsylvania was low on that list and the black population is large there
California is going to rank high in regard to health care because of the Kaiser Permenante system. It’s one of the few states with broad healthcare for all citizens. The pay in California is comparably higher than other states. There is still the issue of cost of living. Having lived in California, if you’re outside of major metropolitan areas, you feel like you’re in Mississippi. It doesn’t seem as though they factored in things like marriage or sense of community through surveys when this list was curated. What something looks like on paper is not necessarily going to dictate your experience. My pay is lower in Philadelphia, but I can pursue my interest and have a sense of community . While my pay may be increased by 40% living outside of Philadelphia, there are few other benefits. I actually have great insurance, but when I go to these health offices run by whites and staffed by whites, they insinuate I’m dirty and promiscuous. They are so focused on what diseases black women are statistically more likely to have they don’t actually screen or manage the things I actually came to have taken care of. Great insurance doesn’t equal better healthcare. More money doesn’t mean your happiness is increased.
Yes. Kaiser was a God send. I didn’t understand it when I was first out there but I get it now!
Oh wow. I’m from the outskirts of Philly, I’ve never felt that way when going to the doctors, but i will say generally doctors ignore black womens concerns and symptoms. The healthcare system is not friendly to us
But Montgomery county in PA was just the worst county in all areas of life anyway. I said in another comment that PA is trash
Omg , I lived in Philly for a contract , I’ve also lived in nyc & disliked it a lot . But I loved & had a great experience in Philly . I’m looking to move to cali now . Idk what to doooo 😂
My family immigrated to NYC. We were priced out and moved to the outer boughs. I moved back to Manhattan with my husband where he purchased us an apartment. I got a full scholarship to a Uni in Upstate NY. A red Catholic conservative state where everyone looked like children of the corn - just different shades of blond from Albino blond to mousey blond. I had a GREAT dating life! Who would’ve dunk it?
Now I was a division one track star, student athlete and a cheerleader on my off season. I was treated like a badie badie by w guys who took me on lavish intentionally dates, paid for Spring break in Cabo, skiing in Aspen on Winter breaks and weekend homes to meet their parents. In my head I saw my prince as b but they were very few.
1. I date a handsome smart Jamaican medical student- I was falling in love until I found out his last gf was w and broke up with him. He stalked me and I had to lay low on campus.
2. A brilliant, but color struck Afro Latino. He said if he works hard and makes enough money his mother can get him a wife amongst the w Latino families in the DR. He was sweet and mercenary at the same time. Always comparing skin color and hair textures.
3. A Black American hockey player star Athlete from an upper middle class family. He asked me on a date, but was very hostile and competitive towards me. I was a couple minutes late to our date and he gave me a lecture about responsibility etc., when we both were student athletes that worked and had a full class load. He was attracted to me, while also looking down on me and he had no empathy for my well being. He saw me as other, when we had the same status. I ghosted him.
I met my love, my forever husband. We both were the only b people in the area and instantly walked up to each other. He was a professional athlete in training camp. I was up there for cheerleading. He’s 6 3 and I’m 5 7. We both said perfect height. He said all the 4 11 girls chase him and need to be with 5 4 boys. I fell in love when I first saw him, he told me he was in love after 4 months and we got engaged after 6 and married a 1 and few months later.
Afterwards, I found where I went to Uni was the most racist state for B people. But it was my best dating experience with W guys and as a virgin too!!
And the place I fell in love. Well, I also fell in love when I was 5 but that didn’t pan out.
LOL.Girl, this was a whole storytime. And I loved it!
Love this! Thank you!
I'm an Afro Latina and what you said about the men is 100% correct. The women are proud of our African roots, the men are on a campaign to whiten the next generation. Where did your family immigrate from?
Uhhh is there a point to your story? Or is this just a Humble Brag about all the different men hitting on you?!
Bish you need to write this book I would so buy it ! 😂
I think people miss the moral of the story, mindset is everything, the best dating place for black women isn't geographical it's actual, like where ever you want to make it, like ask yourself WTF do you want out of life and out of a man, then go date men who want those things too, I dated all the dudes ( not slept with but actually dated) across all the continents but I ended up marrying someone I'd known since elementary school, my bff's (who is a guy) younger brother. I realized when it came to long haul relationship, I needed someone who I knew and who knew me for it to work.
My husband and I are both army brats and I'm black, and my husband is Chinese American (his dad) and black ( his mom) side, his Mom, Dad and my Dad knew each other from highschool and my Dad and his Mom both joined the military out of highschool and her man's popped the question and followed her, but our Dad's are best friends from way back.
😢 You are ABSOLUTELY right about Corpus Christi. I did not find out until I moved there. Not only can I not get a doctor to see me there (even as a veteran;) but I am constantly discriminated against and ignored. I thought my hometown (Houston) was stressful. Yes, it was; but the emotional distress I feel in Corpus has made my blood pressure rise. Crazy enough, when I took a month 'vacation' back to stressful azz Houston, my blood pressure went back to normal. Note: I left my city as a lower income Black Woman, and returned as a wealthier woman who could afford an Airbnb for that long (away from my old hood.)
I am in Houston right now, taking another break before catching a flight to Georgia. I am going on a real estate hunt for a couple of weeks. Wish me luck 🤞🏽
As a dark skin black woman living London, UK it can get quite difficult here but for black women, especially darker skinned black women in Europe and USA, our best bet is to be open to all races otherwise being single is gonna be the most likeliest of options. Loving the vids Steph!
I’m 44 & I’m not giving up! I stay in Houston & my Husband is coming some day.
Let’s keep hope alive right with u
I live in the DMV very cultural and high end affordable living. As a black women I see a lot of black couples like dark skin women / dark skin men 👏👏 it’s the perfect suburban area but still close to a city atmosphere
I live in Canada so forgive me but what does DMV stand for?
It comforts me to no end to see dark skin women and men together. Like fills me with joy. 🎉😊
@@danichangg8408 DMV = DC, Maryland, Virginia tri-city-area
My city - Sandy Springs, GA was #8 on the list of the best cities for black women!!! That totally tracks because I moved here from California and I LOVE it here. I'm never going back to the west coast. Sandy Springs is just a couple of miles away from Buckhead and about a 20 minute drive to downtown Atlanta. Everyone in this city is so friendly and it's also very ethnically diverse.
I live in houston but I’m interested in moving to ga! How is the rent cost in that area?
just moved here from cali too and i loveeee it here too. ☺️
I live in the Atlanta area and I like Sandy Springs as well, they also have a great restaurants!
Nice to know, I was really turned off by Atlanta but Georgia seems nice.
@@C_theesiren You should visit and see if you like the area. The rent here is still lower than the average amount for the state of Georgia (forget the exact number).
I think there needs to be distinct data between Black women with families (mainly children) versus single, childless Black women, because what you’re looking for in a city or region is distinctly different. A mother might prioritize a city with great schools over a place with great dating prospects.
Having said that! I used to work between offices in DC, Richmond, VA and the VA Beach/Chesapeake/Hampton Roads area. Although DC is a more fun place to be single, Black women in the VA Beach area definitely seemed to be some of the most partnered women I’d encountered in all of my travels. I will say I didn’t spend a lot of time in places like Newport News and Suffolk, so I won’t speak for the area generally. But I DEFINITELY noticed how many Black, two-parent families there were. All of the Black adults in the office where I worked were Black and either married or engaged. In fact, a few couples even worked in the office lol. Nobody was going to happy hour after work-everybody was going home to their spouses and their children. At the time, I was unmarried and childfree so I didn’t like visiting much, but it would probably be a great region now to explore. Employment seems steady (there’s a military base) and pre-pandemic, I know a lot of DC offices were considering offloading their offices to VA Beach and Richmond for cost purposes.
ETA: I’ll also add that quite a few people asked if they could set me up with someone. I had a boyfriend so the answer was always no, but they were eager to get me with somebody lol
Yes. Absolutely.
This was my experience when I attended school, but with Maryland.
That’s some of these folks problem, don’t know if they want to be serious or just have “fun”
Met my now husband 3 months of moving to Houston from NYC. I enjoy both cities for different reasons, but I think overall Houston is one of the better places for single black women to thrive.
@WHITES LOVE MY PLAYLISTS Houston is definitely on my list!!
I wish I would have moved there instead of Dallas.
girl , i can believe this .. whenever i visit Houston , i meet a man trying to take me seriously , Lawd Lawd . that's neverrrrrr the case where i live in Los Angeles , at least not yet .. settling down into a committed relationship isn't high up enough on my priority list right now to move down South , as the most recent man I met in Houston was trying to convince me to do , but i definitely appreciate the Black men seriously checking for Black women out there
The black men enjoy black women SEX IN HOUSTON but to date ? The games are exhausting and you will end up married being a swinger or in a open relationship and I’m not doing that 😭
You've been coming through with the videos🙌 The goal isn't to move to other states but another country. I've met so many expats who've created communities and are living more comfortably. They open businesses, build relationships with locals and embrace their culture. Idk about dating, but overall mental health seems so much more important then dating and wealth☺️
@WHITES LOVE MY PLAYLISTS kick rocks
@WHITES LOVE MY PLAYLISTS your profile pic, "white pride worldwide"? I don't fuck with white nationalists/supremacist, I've seen you post this same dusty message on other posts. So again kick rocks
I’ve got to watch this playlist!
I think dating really impacts your mental
Health bc partnership is important for a lot of people and so is healthy sexual
expression. I have heard that the expat life is the right life though…I want to do another video about that
Have you travelled abroad by yourself? Or lived in a different state? It takes a certain type of person to move let alone move to a different country, you have to be confident within yourself and have a strong back bone and mental state to make logical decisions because it's not for the faint hearted or all roses. You are literally starting over again, all those simple things are no longer simple to sort out because your status as a foreigner complicates your options. Also it helps if you have a career that's 8n demand, e.g. dr, nurses, specialist, engineer, chartered accountant then that's one less stress etc I'm just being honest because a lot of people who say they want to move to another country are just running away from something and hiding their head in the sand about something that they should deal with first
Expat life is incredible! I’m so glad I decided to live abroad, even though I decided later in life. Once u leave the US, it’s very difficult to go back so please be aware of that.
I agree!
I live as an expat over the last 7 years. I'm currently in Serbia, and I see many Black American, European, and African women married to Serbians living their best life!
Did you give up your passport?
I would love to talk more about expats in another video. This seems to be a very popular solution for many people.
@@hellostephco84 those other countries being mentioned is a form of gaslighting. Anybody looking for Blake women in Panama or Columbia ain't got no money.
@@sp123 No need to renounce your citizenship. You can technically return to the US at any time for any reason if you are a citizen.
I’m originally from AZ/NV and if you’er not willing to date Latino men, then you’re going to have a hard time. All my boyfriends in high school were Spanish. There’s a lot of Latinos in this area. Also they may not marry you, but just date... because Latino women always break up a relationship, if their men date other races ( they’re super territorial, but will date a brotha in a heart beat 🙄...so prepare for that
I approve this message. Absolutely true I'm moving before I the end of the year. Arizona is not it for black women.
I was there for a long time. Unless you’re the Candace Owens Stacy Dash type, it’ll be hard. Latino guys there are ok-ish
What is the Candace Owens/Stacy type?
@@suadpattonbey7239 skinny, ready to say some “unusual” things or at least pretend not to notice racism, straight hair
Is NV the same way?
Originally from NY, but moved to the DC area ( otherwise known as the DMV) after college. 10 years later, it is the best decision I’ve ever made. I have a great career and amazing husband. Many of my friends are in relationships and/or married. There are several men that make over six figures in this area, but the cost of living is pretty high here. Hope this is helpful!
I’m moving to Tysons Corner! I’m so excited about it!❤️
@@tonyas.6148 How did that go?
Thank you
I think in terms of improving your livelihood being on either coast is your best bet. I think those areas/regions tend to have opportunity, diversity and social activities. This is just an assumption, but I think moving to a place where you'd be a novelty will improve your dating possibilities. On another note I went to Los Angeles for the first time last year and I saw SO many black women in relationships, most of which were interracial. That contrasted what I'd been hearing about the LA dating scene for years.
Tons of interracial relationships for black women. If you are a black woman dating in LA, he probably is not Black 🤷🏾♀️
I don’t know where you were in LA but trust me LA is not a place for single black women.
@@sincereiam agreed. I live in Los Angeles, dead center pretty much, between Beverly Hills and DTLA, and if you're a Black woman interested in dating Black men, *the dating scene in L.A. is NOT for you* . my last relationship was with a man I met while in Houston for a girlfriend's birthday , the one before that was a guy i knew from secondary school back home in Louisiana that moved to L.A. (with me in mind, according to his best friend) .. since living in L.A., almost every guy that has put in enough effort to take me on a date was from the South , East Coast or a foreign country . there was only ONE from Inglewood that took me out after my thirsty behind basically begged by hinting until he finally did . i've been in L.A. for over 5 years now and am very social , always out and about , so it's not like i'm speaking from a limited experience . it's sad to say , but it's the truth , the vast majority of eligible Black bachelors in Los Angeles are NOT pursuing Black women
@@TeKeyaKrystal So why pursue black men then perhaps that’s the problem with black women quit being loyal to a group of men that aren’t checking for you… 🤷♀️
@@sincereiam If you are only looking to date black men then that’s true
I live in Atlanta and I went to college in the Atlanta area and I had a overall positive dating experience. I met my college sweetheart and we’re still together. What I have noticed is that people that go to college in Atlanta are more likely to be partnered married or engaged because they usually meet their person through their college net work. However, moving to Atlanta as a women I would say 25 and up can be very challenging to date. I also noticed that Charlotte North Carolina wasn’t on the list for best cities to date, I’ve heard really positive things for people that have moved there.
Yes! Born and raised in Atlanta and still live here. Very similar experience, I met my boyfriend in college and we’re still together. But every single person I know is able to date without issue.
Correct I’m fortunate to be married but if I were to be single now in my 30s I would be out of options bc my generation in general have too many issues and I’m a burnout empath and I’m done healing people so I really don’t have that many friends people are friendly in the surface but if u don’t look like them it’s harder to make good friends. I managed to stay friends with my high school friends but struggled to gain anymore decent friends since for context
I don't know about these lists. I mean dating is one thing, I've been on plenty of dates but what happens after. I would prefer to see a list where black woman are happily married the most.
Yes!!!!
Born in Los Angeles, spent 10 yrs in NYC, now in Houston. Houston is by far the most promising place for me as far as dating, social life, and career advancement. I've spent the last 15 yrs of my life trying to achieve what I've done in 3 years so far in Houston
Wow! You look fantastic 🥰 the hair, the ombre colour, the swept to the side style, with the makeup and that top... Girl you look great! I love this look on you! Cute nails too! x
Thank you ❤️. This was like my favorite hair it’s a free tress something something I’ll have to look it up lol. But I wasn’t planning on likening it so much and I do!
Raleigh has A LOT of black male professionals from the ages of 20-45. The odds seem good enough, but ya know if you want to be treated a specific way then you still have to be particular. However the men are at least respectful and have relocated from variety of places so anyone's "type" of black man is here for sure.
I’m a raleighite. I recommended Durham
@@cyn7993 I'm more referring to the Northwest area for clarification with the airport, rtp, and cary nearby. There are a lot of employment opportunities for well paying job. As far as being a woman here tho. There's not much to do.
I agree Raleigh is relocation central.😅
I lived in Raleigh for 8 years. Unless you're a college student or already have a family I'd recommend Charlotte.
@Tomika Kelly why do you say this? What makes Charlotte different if you don't mind me asking?
I’m a Nurse Practitioner and lived in Waco (8 years) and DFW area (2 years). I had 3 boyfriends during this time after my divorce in 2012. I’m still single. But these last 2 years I have not felt the need to date so I stay to myself and am asexual. Good luck in finding true love ladies 🥰
one thing ill say is there is a difference between having a dating pool and having men who want to settle down. A lot of times, youll get a "good dating culture" which just means people who like casual dating with no aim to get married. So keep that in mind when it comes to the dating scene...my experience is ive never been somewhere where men didnt "date" black women, but all throughout the south you have a culture of men who wont commit to black women. thats the difference.
best thing when it comes to love is looking at population. you are looking for a city where there are fewer women than men so that men feel they need to compete. cities tend to be bad because you get commitmentphobia as everyone feels they have hella options. so a suburb with more men than women in your best bet
Preach
The west coast fit that description but most black women complain they still struggle to date there. So they move to the south or the east coast.
well , i'm glad you've "never been somewhere where men didn't date Black women" , but um... i've been living in Los Angeles for over 5 years now and the vast majority of Black men quite actually do NOT "date" Black women.. i'm not using that as a figurative phrase.. i seriously mean it's rare to see Black men taking Black women on literal dates . it's not only that the Black men aren't committing here , they're not even pursuing you for a little fun as a Black woman
🤓
@@TeKeyaKrystal Same in Seattle, sis. I've been up and down the west coast and I've seen the same thing all throughout it it's very much a place where black men are hot commodity and they're highly coveted because not only do the black women want them but so do whites the Asians and Hispanics as well. They literally have their pick of the litter they don't have to date us whatsoever they have so many women of all races that want them. They don't even look in our direction because for them the options are abundant there. I see it every day. I would honestly advise any black women to stay away from the West Coast if you are looking for marriage but maybe visit and live there for a few years just to experience it.
As someone who grew up in Sugar Land, arc (outside of Houston) and moved to Hampton, Va, I completely agree with the 3 of the 7 cities listed ( Va Beach, Chesapeake and Hampton) it definitely gives but Hampton is a bit expensive rent wise but you get the comfort aspect. I think it’s the large military and higher education population here that contributes to this
Steph! These last few videos have been some of your best. Your voice and intention feels clear, confident, etc. Thank you for your content. Also, you have comedic gifts. Bring back the skits-- they are funny AF!!! I love the skits-hilarious!!!
agreed . she's a great orator and talent
I'm from the DMV, specifically Maryland, but close to DC. I'm only 21 so my dating experience isn't extensive, but it feels like a great place to find love at any age. Lots of colleges around, so good for young adults. Lots of popular companies so lots of working people to meet. I'm biased because I love it here, but I would def recommend.
OMG AND GHANA MADE THE LIST? Sorry, proud Ghanaian over here 🇬🇭 Imma be honest with y'all though, if you're a straight woman, Ghana is not for you. Our men are messy and it's a very patriarchal country in terms of social dynamics. My own family members have discouraged me from marrying a Ghanaian. If you're any kind of LGBTQ+ and plan to date, don't. Speaking as a queer woman, Ghana is progressive in some aspects, but not that one.
I would say that if you’re straight ghana is for you,,, queer no
Omg really??? Nooo I love Ghanaian men. 😭😭
@@princessm8977 I'm glad someone does 😂
@@SapphicKnits lmao!!!
Is there a lot of Nigerians there ?
Chicago ladies. I live here currently and I’m from here. The thing is you have to be OPEN to all races. There are a lot of non black men who dates Black Women. The thing w black men out here is they are not as colorist, I will say the colorism isn’t on 10 like a lot of others places. This is solely on DATING. As far as finically. I’m not sure. Dating only is the purpose of this comment.
Loved seeing your ad! First time i've seen one here; you're really good at making transitions and your speaking points seemed quite genuine. I'd like to support if you do more in the future!
I thought the same thing.
Very fitting ad as well
They need to start working on a new planet for us but I would leave the states for sure
💯
😂😂😂😂🙃
Hi Steph, Excellent Broadcast! I really Appreciate the Journalistic aspect coupled with your commentary. Refreshing change of pace! I’m from DC, It’s really a really good place move if you can afford, and you want an above average dating pool date. Watch out Folks, Washington DC can be very Finicky and cliquish. Washingtonians feel like they have a standard to uphold! LOL! So the competition is fierce! Black Women are really handling their business, in the DMV, in a good way. Good guys are checking. So much to choose from, for both women and men. It not just the District of Columbia, it the whole DMV!All the Best! 🥰
I’m an outdoorsy Mississippi native black woman that loves diversity in culture yet a really calm conservative community life. I reside in Atlanta, and I hate it. It’s too flashy, fast, materialistic & countercultural. The women hear are STRUGGLING, I hear conversations about not being able to find men to date and artificial insemination more than I’m comfortable with. I can’t speak personally, but from the plethora of black women here that are educated and financially secure, Atlanta is definitely not it. They are balancing either men who have no aims at commitment or bi/homosexuals. I’ve traveled to many places in the states and if I were in this situation seeking relationship, I would focus on a midsized cities- my favorites being Bend, OR, Birmingham, AL, Nashville, TN, Asheville, NC. The positive community culture is definitely represented in its citizens. The men there have been so much more traditional in dating than what I’ve seen in LA, ATL, Houston, Dallas and NY.
Agree completely!
I also live in Atlanta and moved here from Nashville, TN. I completely agree with your comment. I find the dating scene and just living in this city to be completely exhausting.
Okay I so can relate! Outdoorsy, Mississippi gal myself. Been here in Atlanta 7 years and dating here is horrible! Scam capital for sure. Men are looking for women as a come-up, bi, HOBOsexual and so much more. 0/10 don't recommend Atlanta for a single, childless woman that are financially secure.
I agree as well! I live in Charlotte, NC.
Yep, Atlanta is not it. Have several black friends with their doctorates and masters and who are traditionally pretty who are single
I’m a black woman who lives in Az! I absolutely love it here! I’ve always found good employment, dated some pretty nice men… Been with my bf for 2 years…Cost of living is going up but that’s everywhere. Weather is great, the community I live in is great. Great outdoor activities! I have no complaints honestly…
Good to hear! Bc on TikTok they were tearing it up!
Same!
@@abundantambiance991 I grew up in Az but my family is from the east coast…I lived in Florida for a bit too. Hated it! Lol!
Hello my love about where in AZ I was thinking of moving there but don't know a good city
@@tonyarobinson7284 I will always recommend the East Valley. So anything East of Phoenix. Scottsdale, Chandler, East Mesa and Gilbert are great options. You’ll be 15 to 20 min from downtown Phoenix. Great schools, employment, housing, dining and community.
Atlanta was fun, great for dating interesting, creative black men but also a lot of bummy men (no job, no car, no clue). DC was the best for dating educated men, but some of them were very egotistical and prioritized work over building a relationship. My boyfriend and I met in DC (dating apps). We’ve been together for two years now and recently moved to NYC together, so I would say DC is the best for black single women. NYC seems like a fun place to date, there’s so many date options here and people who just want to have a good time, but I’ve also seen and heard a lot of triflingness. I also dated in Pittsburgh, a bunch of weirdos but also the best, nicest personalities out there. I also experienced more interracial dating in Pittsburgh and DC (if you’re into that).
Pittsburg lol just sounds like hipster paradise,but tbh I'd probably like it
When I lived in Chicago , I went on a lot of dates. Some high earners and some not. However, I never had a legit relationship. Dating was easy in Chicago compared to Nashville. I thought moving south would expose me to black men who wanted families and marriage. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case. The black men here are huge on interracial dating, love 50/50 , and to be honest do not want to live around African Americans.
The only good thing about Nashville is the churches, although I’m single my church always has something going on for all ages. I do see myself meeting my husband in Nashville. The white men here are really nice and quick to speak to you .
aka they are sovereign something bw do not want to be .
So the interracial conundrum IS a southern thing, interesting, I’m here and Texas and blk men don’t even bat an eye (not tripping tho)
Yeap it’s worst in the south contrary to belief. I lived in the south most of my life and I lived on off in Ohio and had more luck in 6 months then I had in Atlanta (I know ATLANTA is bad bad in dating. I moved there for school). In 7 years!!
The west coast is big on interrecial dating not so much the south
@@C_theesiren lol! I oh yeah? Well tell that to my NYC relatives who moved there and they sure will tell you a totally opposite story. One actually made a joke and said a BW where they moved ain't got a chance cause too BM down there want WW.
Your advice in the last five minutes of the "my heart was broken at friendsgiving" video was ON POINT. Everyone should take heart to your advice there. You will know if he is going to do _______ when he does _______. That goes for ANYONE we spend way too much time worrying when people are going to do what they are going to do-or not. LOL. Anyway we have no power over it and waste our time worrying. That resonated with me so deply. Thank you
I think Houston is right to go on this list. There's a lot of Black men here, and Black men that I have dated have said they exclusively seek out Black women to date, which already is a step ahead Black men living in many other cities.
Yeah I had a good experience dating in Houston as well… I’m back in south Florida (where I’m from) and it’s decent too
There’s a lot of options down here BUT there’s still a lot of men who want and date black women especially in Broward
I live in the DMV area and honestly I don’t plan to move anywhere outside of these areas. I’m originally from DC and I know that dating here is rough. I went to school is Maryland (Howard county) and often ran into men who came from great backgrounds. I see lots of professional looking men walking the streets in Baltimore as well.
I miss your dating stories. Please start them again. 😭😭
Join her patreon
Patreon! 😉
I think it’s hard to date in Chicago If you don’t live down town or in the north side . A lot of parts in the south side and east side are so dangerous and hard to get around in Chicago. You can strive In down town and up north with dating but the rent is soooo expensive and living is too much . I had to move cause I was barely making ends meet.
I dated a lot in Chicago. BUT... it's very segregated. I don't think I dated a Black guy in Chicago.
THIS IS ALSO VERY TRUE!!!! I keep trying to tell people, it is like the Jim Crow South! It's awful. But, when you grow up there it feels normal. Not until I moved somewhere else did I realize how bad Chicago's racial segregation is! That said, it's still a pretty phenomenal city to live in. It has a lot going for it. I'd definitely move back.
What race are you?
Yes growing up there I was never around anybody else but Latinos and blck people. I wanted to be around a more diverse group. I moved to Cincinnati like 2 years ago and it’s the complete opposite here. Everyone mingles and there are SO many mixed people! I don’t think Ive ever seen this many mixed people in one place before lol
@@XoXoG I'm Black. But lived near the Puerto Rican and Mexican areas. So, most Latinos approached me.
Very segregated. It’s always been this way.
Love your braids!!! They look so good!
I wish I had considered my mating options as well when picking a college. I went to school in Iowa LOL. If you're a black girl in high school and watching this, also factor in what you would like socially, not only academically, when picking a place to go for college.
Yes. Not enough emphasis on that bc people want young women to just focus on their studies but college is a great pace to learn who you are romantically too.
This!!! I graduated from FSU so it was plenty of dating options plus FAMU is literally 5 minutes away but I felt like most of the guys didn’t have anything to offer (which was an immature mistake because ofc they didn’t have anything yet…)
I really should have taken relationships more seriously in college because afterwards is slim pickings 🙄🤦🏽♀️😐
shoot , mating wasn't even on my mind in college ... shoot.. still aint fr fr & i'm crawling towards the big three-oh
Personally I really like the Phoenix area. I’m also a bit on the conservative side. But think it depends on what is important to you and what you are looking for. I think the area in AZ makes a difference too. As well as age range. If you are more settled, Arizona is nice and chill. But I must admit I also lived there when I was 22 (38 now) while active duty military and loved the club scene as well. There were some nice spots, although of course nothing like Houston or something. But still cool. I was in shock when I moved from there to the New Orleans area and realized I enjoyed it more in AZ. I also dated a lot living in Phoenix as well. Especially interracial dating. Latino men of course. But honestly dating is no longer at the top of my priority list so I’m not much help in giving advice in that area.
All in all, it’s personal choice, your own experience, and again, what’s important to you. Way out the pros and cons for what YOU need before making a move. I honestly never been one to do what every else does just because. The rare times I have done that, I was miserable. 🤷🏾♀️. But I enjoyed the video! This was an interesting topic. Plus I love the comment section and reading everyone else’s experiences and advice❤️
Ok so I am 28 and I live IN Atlanta and have been here about a year. I love it because there are many events and things to do being a tourist city . It’s easy to find a man here but they are not of quality . You either get a bum user or a financially stable pompous “ I’m the prize” type . And with them they put so much pressure on you to look a certain way to maintain their image . They are very shallow.
So don’t judge me I gave up on dating and decided to get into the sugar baby type of lifestyle and Atlanta is good for that material type of women . It is like lounges , designer, bbl type of thing going on here in atl . So in this culture It’s very hard to get serious with a guy because once you get into a fight once he will move on to someone else because they are a ton of women here . Atlanta is also huge on polygamy. I can be in the talking stage with someone, and out of the blue he’s asking about 3 somes and sister wives . Its not real poly , you just get desperate women willing to share their man to keep him or men using poly as a cover up for a sex addiction . It’s honestly very messy and men know they are allowed to be trash and will still have plenty of options unfortunately. I don’t see myself living here long term unless I move to away from the city . I have briefly lived in Houston and I did date quite a bit there some very nice guys and I liked it I could see being able to get serious with someone there but I wasn’t there long to sustain . Atlanta is just good for black businesses, networking, medical field , nightlife but not dating .
Girrrrlll, tell me about it! Been in Atlanta for YEARS now. The DECEIT among these men is real.. the emotional availability and maturityis SPARSE. They are literally confused when you tell them your are not sharing.. I've overstayed my visit, time to GO.
Would you say that the Houston men are more marriage minded?
As an “alternative” black women who’s traveled and lived all over the states and out of the country I recommend North Dakota (any major city) and Denver. Other than that visit other countries and see what feels like home for me it was China (unfortunately can’t go there), South Africa, & Guatemala.
P.S. I’m from California
Curious, whereabouts in North Dakota?
@@Merdenoms I went to school in Minot but the other major cities are similar
@@habeshasister11 Thanx. Will look into that area.
I felt invisible in Denver. Interesting
Are you saying that China felt like home to you?
Can you please do the safest places to travel for black women?
Michigan really is a great state for black women, well, southeast Michigan at least, haha. I lived in Southfield, MI for a number of years and it is a great city for black women. I’m not surprised it’s #1 as it’s right outside of Detroit. Lots of culture, food, and fun. If you can handle cold winters, come on over 😂
I came here to say that! I live in Detroit. When I saw Southfield, I thought, That completely tracks. Having lived in Minneapolis-St. Paul, MN for a couple of years, I'm quite used to winters here. #DownCoatsAreAThing
Now, this area of the country for love? Can't say, but I'm also not looking. 🤷🏿🤷🏿🤷🏿🤷🏿
I’m in Detroit and I agree. I love it here. Not only is it the Blackest (percentage wise) city in america. We are diverse in our Blackness, people are down-to-earth, kind, damn near everyone has their own business and we are thriving - thriving.
I just made the same comment! I recommend Southfield for a black woman too.
I’ve heard good things about Michigan.
I met my husband in Atlanta and had a robust dating life before I met my husband. I will say I always dated from the global village. If you limit yourself to BM, you are setting yourself up for very long dry spells.
I’m a black woman born and raised in Arizona. I’m 27 and recently single after a 4 year relationship. So now I’m trying to start over and I hate Arizona. It’s hot, it’s boring, and there no natural water which I don’t like. I want to move out of here by the time I’m 30 I just really need to work 2 jobs save and start planning. I’m glad I came across this video! Thank you😊😊
I’m mixed and ambiguous from the west coast (California and AZ)and i feel like black men don’t want to date even mixed women lol.They’ll entertain but will “fall in love” with a Latina,Asian,or white women first.It’s all good..date out!Date who wants to date you if you’re into them…quite frankly,i don’t see black men getting married or wanting to get married as much as other men do anyways,and marriage is important to me.
Facts 💯 .
Nonsense
If we are speaking only about dating (casual, get-to-know you, grab dinner) I had a ball in Houston. I met so many men- some who I am still good friends with to this day! But marriage & love in Houston? yikes. Now I live in New York and well...everything you've heard is true. But I will say this- as a woman, there is a certain assertiveness you need to have to meet men on the East coast IRL. The whole eye contact, speak first thing is real because if you don't- a lot of these men will literally not even notice you. Not because you aren't beautiful or engaging but because there are soo many more women:men here.
I’ve lived in Miami and Minneapolis MN.
MIAMI PROS is there is a large community of young professionals but dating here as a black woman is hard because it is very superficial and everyone here is a 10/10. It’s also hard to date if you are not Caribbean because it is very segregated and people usually stay within their racial/ethnic group.
MINNEAPOLIS is cute but very small. The winters are bad but the summers and fall is to die for. Minnesota is very white and dating here as a black woman will only work if you like white men (it is pretty rare to find a black man who openly date black women. Even light skin women). I am from Minneapolis is it will always be home but I hope this helps someone!
I lived in Miami too. It’s a very prejudice place for Black ppl
also from mpls, can confirm
As someone from Minneapolis, if you are a black immigrant or the child of a black immigrant it will be easier for you to date other black people because the black immigrant community here is close.
I find men in Miami to be a bit colorist.
Love the transition to your sponsorship girl 😂 I just like who likes me. I live in Michigan and I believe I’m flourishing. Just bought my first home and I have a good job 😊 I will never move somewhere for love…
Virginia Beach, Hampton, and Chesapeake are all very close to each other, basically a county. And in my experience the success is probably attributed to the military. Military, military, military area. Many Black women (not all) have success because they are either enlisted, retired or married to someone enlisted. The 2 benefits from the military most used are healthcare and 0 down payment on homes. So many, many black homeowners with stable financial situations here. I live in the area and really like it for my family. Va Beach has good public schools, is diverse and is not too “Southern” because so many people from all over the country/world live here due to the military.
I trained at fort eustis and I don’t remember that many black people in that area I may be wrong
I’m a 757 native, from Portsmouth and currently live about 20 minutes away from Va Beach. I’ve lived in Morgantown, WV for grad school for 2 years and NYC for almost 2 years before the pandemic hit, which caused me to relocate back here in VA. I agree on the huge pool of military men and women, however I do not 100% agree with Va Beach being a great place to live, due to the long outstanding history of racism ( I meant let’s not forget Something in the Water’s relocation in DC because the city’s non sense of urgency for injustice of a black man innocent life taken by a Va Beach cop).
There has been little to some strides but as a native with friends and family that have either worked or lived in VA beach, I would give it a 5/10 for Black women to thrive.
This is not me bragging at all or bashing a preference of stability/lifestyle over the other. I figured I would present my two cents being I came from a big city to back home. Before I worked in the position I have now (remote, federal government, salary on the higher end ), the pay is not super grand (60-65k average) which isn’t horrible but it’s not going to give you big city lifestyle dollars. Dating pool for me has been so so. You won’t find a lot of men in tech or working at a huge financial/government firm, outside of the shipyard, but there are men who are long shoremens, merchant seamens, etc., but I see it as long as one manages their money well, lives within their means and has good credit you can’t go wrong. A lot of men are into getting married and establishing families here with a huge concentration in faith based relationships.
Nightlife isn’t the best. I’m not a clubber but I love lounges. Everything closes at midnight or1am here and most of the DJ’s suck. Depending on which event/party you go to and who you know, there are a few gems here to find. Networking events are always happening and mom and pop restaurants are everywhere. If you’re vegan, the options to eat have been expanding these past few years.
However, above all of that I can say living and affordable decent housing is pretty feasible. I live in a luxury appt with cable, internet, washer and dryer included in my rent and pay less than $1600. I’m responsible for water, sewage, electric, heat but that’s still not bad in my opinion. A good amount of folks in our age group 30+ invest in houses.
I would keep going but I feel like I would want some others to chime in before I continue. Just my thoughts but over all it’s not a terrible place to live for home ownership and affordability. I would encourage one to travel a lot like I do to your fav cities/areas if you still want that city energy/nightlife/eclecticism/overall diverse culture that some cities offer .
@@mordakie3805🤔it’s one of the Blackest metros in the country
The thing with California is you need to know people who are from California to get the experience. I grew up in California so I know where to go, friends, etc. People who move to California will always have a different experience unless they make a Friend who knows a friend to bring you in. Otherwise your experience will be really limited. Sorry to say that.
Chicago was great to & for me. Once you find your tribe, in whatever city, it seems to sustain most of us.
Your braids are on point! Love the highlights!
Interesting! I actually live near Southfield and I think it’s a great area for black women too. Many companies in the area have high numbers of black people (and women) in leadership roles. Most of my black girl friends are married (and to a black man!) and own a home or on the path to doing so. Southfield neighbors Detroit, which is 75% black. During the economic challenges, many black people who were financially able to leave left Detroit and relocated right next door to Southfield. It’s a pretty nice suburban community with a lot of green space and room to spread out. And it’s 10 minutes from several nice downtowns, like royal oak, Ferndale, Detroit, Birmingham, etc. So a lot to do! The only downside to me is that the taxes can be high and the schools could be better. But cost of living Is much better than most of the country.
I live in Miami, its very nice in terms of area and night life but dating on the other hand is not so good, most men aren't ready to settle down and its demographic is mainly hispanics and most hispanics stick to their race its very challenging IN the dating aspect and also the living expenses are extremely HIGH
Which explains it being #2 on the WORST list 🤣
There’s also a great deal of European men here. They are more willing to date black women, trust me. Just show a little interest.
@@itsniquenique45 Yes! I’ve grown up in Miami, lived in Fort Lauderdale and Pompano Beach on the intercostal. Rarely do black men approach me. It’s always been European, Hispanic, Israeli or men from the Midwest that pursue me.
@@itsniquenique45 I live there and yes they are, but most are not residents and want green cards. Also, as diverse as Miami is there is still a stigma with dating bw. It's secretly frowned upon. I Rarely see bw- nonbm couples. Also, I've had to stop dating latn men when they tell me their family wouldn't accept them being with a bw. Also, they love to use bw for sx. I've dated 2 that were married and lied. With the bm it's very hard because I don't meet too many who are doing well for themselves. No shade to them but I hardly meet bm who went to college or have something going for themselves. It's very annoying. Plus the good ones are taken or looking for nonbw for the most part.
Agree 💯percent, most of the Black men in Miami are not interested in settling down for marriage. Lots of cohabitation and “baby mama” culture, not many young Black professional, married, and economically thriving Black couples here!
The cost of living is also very high due to foreigners driving up the housing market. The pay for jobs is also below par in comparison to the COL.
Most people in that Pembroke Pines and Miramar suburb area are two-income couples. The cost of homes and apartment rentals are very high! The cost of car insurance in the South Florida area is also very expensive.
As a black man I can't really speak on black women experiences (I'll have to ask my 2 sisters) but I was really surprised to see Virginia on the list a few times.
I live in Virginia Beach which is in the area called the Tidewater area. Chesapeake and Hampton Virginia are all within 20 to 40 minutes away from each other.
Alexandria Virginia is in the northern part of Virginia and is where the more wealthy tend to live. Lot of good jobs there. You see Alexandria in movies a lot because it is right outside of Washington DC. And since DC is also on the list, I guess it would reason to say that living in Alexandria will put you within 20 minutes of DC. So there is one of the best places for black women to live and one of the best romance places right next to each other.
Oooooh, thank you sir. I was wondering about VA for a while now. Much love 💕
Surprised why? 6 of the 10 wealthiest Black zip codes in Virginia are in Hampton Roads. The 757 is the fourth Blackest metro over 1.5 million in the US behind Memphis, New Orleans, and Atlanta. And Hampton Roads is third behind DC area and Baltimore area for Black households over $100k. Not to mention NSU, Hampton U, TCC trade school, and even ODU, which is a “white school” is 30% Black. I don’t think certain people know how to use HR because they worry about “hype” and attention too much. Even VA Beach is 20% Black…by contrast Oakland is only 29% Black, but certain people think of Oakland as some super Black place. VA Beach is atleast surrounded by Norfolk, Chesapeake, Hampton etc…all very Black.
Coming from Kansas City, dating here sucks and you'll swipe most of the guys on bumble but the conversations will be like wet card board
Yea dating sucks here
Wet cardboard. 🤣🤣🤣
I live in Hampton Roads, VA (which includes Hampton, VA Beach & Chesapeake) & it really ain't too bad out here.
okay but your home decor!!!!! and your bedding??? SO CUTE!🤍 love u steph!
Thank you! I’m trying to transform my space. Its taking a while but I can’t wait until it’s done!
Come to DC Stephco! Just started the video but I’ve lived in multiple cities in the country and the DMV area is definitely the best place to be a black woman. Amazing opportunities, AMAZING BLACK MEN WHO LOVE BLACK WOMEN!!!!!, a very supportive black affluent community and stuff to do. 😄
💯🎯
I’m thinking about moving there
I live in Florida. I totally agree it’s not a good state at all for black women, especially a dark skinned woman like me. I lived in Pompano years ago. I’m now in my rural hometown. I’m making the best of it with my family but I’m becoming desperate to move!
Dallas native here. I’m married but I can say a few of my single friends are having difficulties dating here. But I know plenty of people who have met their spouse here. My brother in law moved here some years back and met his soon to be wife almost immediately. They’re getting married in October. The DFW area is known as the place you come to settle down.
But recently there have been a lot of transplants so I’m not sure how it is now.
yeah because you have men from the ghetto like nyc, all etc that bring the behavior with them.
I do not think Black women should move to predominantly Black areas. 1. For our safety 2. If we want to get married 3. discrimination of Black women. I think this would be a horrible idea
no let them!!! too many bw are pick mes
@WHITES LOVE MY PLAYLISTS reposting same message still?
data shows your a white supremacist, I've seen your Playlist ( Adolf Hitler channel along with other white nationalist idealogies)
I agree
I agree. My city has a even mixture of black and other races and I’m thriving in my career.
@@brwnhilarybanks9953 Fully agree. I wish more women would stop "warning" them. They're a lost cause. Let them get their lace fronts split at this point and let them continuously search all over the globe for their "kings" until their feet bleed. I'm honestly having a good laugh at a lot of these comments since it's a slow day at work.
Suggesting that women all relocate to some of the most dangerous cities in the country just to find a single "unicorn" blk male is the sickest most pathetic thing I've ever heard, and keep in mind some of these women have children while suggesting moving into warzones to find males who are at the bottom socioeconomically. This is why nobody takes blk women seriously lol. It's insane how oblivious they are. These women are single for a VERY good reason.
I haven’t watched yet but you look INCREDIBLY beautiful!!
I agree with Chicago. Granted, Chicago is fairly segregated but that is due to historical redlining. It’s becoming less segregated these days. As a black woman, I’ve personally been winning in Chicago professionally and in the love department. It is a bit humid, so the hair be hairing😂
New Rochelle is my hometown! No one has heard of it lol. So glad to see it mentioned in a positive light, especially for black women! I honestly had no idea.
Interesting video. I’ve really never thought my geographical location would determine my mating choices, but more so my career choice/field has because as a professional, I spend so much time “careering.” I chose education as a career field and though I make a very generous salary as an executive, it is a female dominated field from top to bottom so rarely do I meet eligible men and the ones that are, know they are rare so they are like kids in a candy store at conferences, conventions, symposiums, etc.
However my female friends who are in male dominated fields ie engineering, tech, aviation, military, the medical field (working in hospitals every day all day with doctors), law, pharmaceutical sales (hell sales period) in general are minorities in those male dominated career fields. We’re in our 40’s and they are rarely dateless, and some are married to men (who, by the way, at minimum are their equal salary wise, which is an issue professional/high earning black women have to contend with in finding a mate) in those fields because the every day almost all day proximity to men will most likely attract somebody’s son to you beyond just the superficial stuff that occurs when you meet people on dating apps. Recent examples: In the past 2 yrs I’ve had at least 3 nurse friends (in their 40’s so don’t believe the hitting the wall crap) to marry (1 remarried) doctors (2 of them) and one an anesthesiologist and they all met them in some kind of work related capacity. One engineering friend just dumped her 6 figure engineer boyfriend 3-4 months ago, and she already has another 6 figure engineer boyfriend in no time that she met out on an assignment. She’s a lovely woman who has phenotypical African American features, skin tone and hair texture so this shows that regardless of what society says, Blk women do have options if they position themselves where the options are. In all, these are average looking women and would not be considered as Instagram model or even trophy wife types at all, but it is something to be said about how people just grow on you organically when you’re around them all the time as you would naturally be in a work related capacity.
I followed my heart with my career choice, but looking back maybe I should’ve followed my head considering how daunting and fruitless meeting dating app strangers can be these days. I would say to younger women to please think about your career choice and your college major because you’re sure to find single men in male dominated majors even more so than in the work world. Your college days and career/work are the two significant areas where you’re gonna spend a great deal of your life so at least choose one that has an equal ratio of men and women but strongly consider male dominated fields. You can possibly kill two birds with one stone by having a good and lucrative (since male dominated industries pay more) career and increase your odds/chances of meeting a suitable mate while doing what you love.
I worked as a Pharma sales rep in NJ and Long Island for 10
Years from my mid twenties to early thirties and despite the industry and clients being male-dominated, during my entire career I was “set-up” on 1 date….80-90% of the men were already married and those that were single were players
Excellent comment. Very accurate from my observations as well
Everything you said was SPOT ON! Men hardly ever venture outside of their bubble for mates, provided they aren't on dating apps. The women in male dominated fields have the advantage of proximity.
@@Jenna1394 you’re right because the women I know in those industries say something to the same effect that you shared about guys not venturing outside of their comfort zone much. Plus work consumes most professionals so even the few free weekend days you have, who has the energy and time to go out mate hunting? Most guys too lazy and/or lack the confidence to do that for fear of rejection. The meaningful relationships I had came from opportunities where I spent a lot of time in incubator or frequent interaction type settings like work (definitely not in my same department though. I would strongly caution against that) and college. Those aren’t contrived environments like going on dates with strangers and having to work to get to know them which is another job in and of itself. Then to add, you’re competing with a catalog of other dating app women and I just don’t have the energy or time for that. At work and in college, people tend to show more of their natural self with time and often times you just click as you naturally get to know them and they get to know you as you’re spending so much time at a place where you both have to be instead of keep having to constantly plan, coordinate time and space for togetherness. That takes work bIn fact that’s how I met the guy who I once was madly in love with, but now we’re best friends in business. I once had an experience being in a male dominated environment and it was like heaven on earth lol. When i was younger, I used to work in the cafeteria of an all male college and I never worried about finding someone to date because the guys were always showing interest incessantly. I do mean Always. In fact, that environment kinda made me believe that I had all the time in the world to meet a man because they were plentiful. Even going to Spelman college (an all female college), we could take classes at Morehouse (an all male college) and I would take classes as much as I could at Morehouse because I earned my college credits and met several men to date through the years of being there and after. At any rate, I could go on and on about this. Although i have no plans to change my career I will say that if I knew then what I know now, my career would’ve been curated much differently. That’s for sure lol.
I really hope this is the case for me… I’m in the engineering field and I feel like a sore thumb compared to the other women I’ve worked with (typical blond hair white blue eyed ladies). But I will say the guys that I work with truly have my back and I’m so grateful for that. I really hope I meet the one. I’m early into my career field. Next year my company will be sending me to Sacramento CA or Guam. Fingers crossed 😅
I recently had an interesting experience with New York. So I live in San Jose, California, in the heart of Silicon Valley and I’ve been using dating apps for about 5 months. On average, I get 4 or 5 likes on Bumble a day. I traveled to New York early August and about 2 hours after landing in New York, I got about 200 likes on Bumble. I was a bit confused by the sudden influx of likes until I checked the settings on Bumble and realized my location has been changed from San Jose to New York. I didn’t go on any dates while in New York but it was certainly eye-opening to see the dramatic increase in potential dates just going to New York
The hookup culture is real in NYC
Chicago isn’t a bad place to date…as long as you’re opened to dating outside your race…BUT my bf is black, and from Chicago, but it took a minute for me to find him 🙃
There’s lots of black men who love black women in chi town…but they’re on the south side LMAO
Elk Grove Ca is in south of Sacramento, I visited a couple of times and I loved it so much! and I hardly can speak about this topic because I came to the US already married. but yes Elk Grove for the win❤️
Um, I’m from Springfield mass… and let me say as soon as I could afford to move away…. I did. It’s a okay place for maybe be when your older and can get far way from the more impoverished areas (which spans pretty wide if you ask me). I moved to nyc at the age of 23 and found my husband there at the age of 27. While it’s an unlikely place for love I feel there’s more opportunities due to the influx of different types of people and activities to meet those people. Only problem is money is funny there if your not rich.
If you lived in Burbank, you where only 30 minutes from Inglewood. I’m born and raised in Los Angeles, I’m a Navy Veteran and I’ve lived all over the US and world. My best experience has been Hollywood Ca, Sherman Oaks, Ca, Miami, Fl and Las Vegas. Currently I live in Las Vegas and the dating here has been good for me. And financially I’m much better off here than LA. You look gorgeous, love the hair on you🌸
One of my best friends is born and raised in AZ and she always complains about the dating there for black women. She says they consider biracial women “black girls” and full black women get ignored 😭
she is not lying ! I’m from AZ and if you ain’t white or Hispanic w straight hair .. you might as well just let it go 😭
Lol bw is definitely not the preference here at all.
@@annetteoleary5691 🤣 At least you know
Spent my first year of college in arizona, moved back home and was diagnosed with major depressive disorder. It wasn’t all bad but going from living in a super diverse city in california to being one of like 10 visibly black people i saw that entire year was extremely jarring
Born and raised in LA and have lived here my entire life. I’ve love it here and enjoy a great quality of life. The Californian cities that are listed in this video are dives. Who in the heck did they poll for this? I’m guessing they made the cut because they have a reasonable cost of living in comparison to the actual cool cities such as LA, San Francisco, Santa Barbara, Pasadena, Beverly Hills, Berkeley, Santa Cruz, and Santa Monica.
I grew up Southern California,went to school in Gardena until highschool,we moved to the OC…all those cities are NOT it Lmaoo..palmdale?!Riverside???Hell no!!😂😂
@@Cwade14 Compton👀
As an ATLien, I do not recommend dating here. The people are superficial, no one wants love, honestly. Your "man" will be at a club or party every night so you'll be in a relationship by yourself.
Yes Atlanta so superficial the men don’t want to settle down everyone want to be something they not it’s to much hype
Definitely don't move to ATL if your looking for love. I've been here since 2017 and been single ever since. I've dated had a 10 month relationship but yeah don't bother. If you are poly or into hookup culture this might be the place for you. Monogamy has no home here lol
That’s the List based on that site! I disagree with NY and Atl. Everyone is moving to Houston and Dallas area so idk about that regarding competition factor. I believe in reality the list for black women is small, but if you get the beauty brains and brand game up, the list can expand.
Grew up in the DFW Texas area. Currently living in Irving, Tx to be close to my job. After working from home for the past 3 years, I can say that it’s changing a lot, but I love living here in Irving/Las Colinas
Grew up here too in within the DFW. Las Calinas is super nice, I’m partial to Mansfield, midloathian that kind of area or even Fort Worth. I would say it’s fairly diverse you just got to know where to hang within Dallas and Fort Worth
I loved Irving and you know what else I loved? Carrollton! And I liked Lewisville (went to college in dfw)
I'll keep it short and sweet. Atlanta ain't it.
😂😂😂
As a black female who went to school in AZ, I was semi-miserable.
I am from Ft Lauderdale FL and it is very hard out here as a black, 36 year old single parent to just survive
As a BW, I concur with the data surrounding Pittsburgh, PA being the WORST city for BW! Even having 2 undergraduate & 1 Master’s degree, bought a home in a nearby suburb when I was 24, & a lack-luster career, I’m probably no better off than I was 10 years ago! It’s HELLA RACIST, NEPOTISM is so blatant & even though we have some of THE BEST Healthcare in the world, black woman are neglected at ASTOUNDING Rates. So
Long story short- RUN BLACK WOMEN RUN!!!!
Just stopping by to say you look gorgeous Steph
🥰🥰
Southfield Michigan was great 20 years ago. In college I met so many middle class black people who were from Southfield. I visited friends homes and thought the city was amazing. So many high earning black people. After graduating I lived there for about 5 years but had to leave because of the crazy increase in crime. Most people I know moved to neighboring cities to escape the crime.
that's not a city I'm familiar with.. you speaking to it's higher likeliness of Black middle class people makes me want to visit
I sometimes only come on here to see your hair. Love the fun styles you rock. Ok now going to listen bc I especially come for your thoughtful commentary 😃