Today is the day I realize why I felt this huge guilt/shame towards everyone, everything ALL THE TIME. I’ve been through that kind of childhood you mentioned. Thanks for sharing.
One type of shame is feeling the need to put on a good face outside the family, when things like parental drunkenness and rage happen behind closed doors. It leads to loneliness, thinking there is no one you, as child, could turn to for understanding or help.
Shame can weirdly go the other way, too, with people who don’t have a house shaming a person for having a house, or women shaming women for being perceived by others as being beautiful and not playing themselves down. It’s like, “You should give up what you have to make me feel better that I don’t have it, and if you don’t you’re a bad selfish person.” People sometimes shame others to manipulate them.
Thank you kindly for your videos. My family probably affected me from the start because my mother was probably undiagnosed BPD and had severe postpartum depression, so I probably even learned stuff from a baby. I also strongly recommend anyone to try DBT if they are interested, it's not just for Borderline. I have CPTSD and it was only in paying attention to my thoughts and patterns that I heard my mother's voice behind them all, just like what Dr. Sage just said. Peace to everyone
You are such a kind and caring human being. Thank you for the energy you transmit through your videos. The content is great but your presence makes all the difference! ❤️
I watch a lot of other psychologists talk about trauma and related topics on YT, and you are seriously one of the best! Sometimes when you explain something that I’ve already heard before, you explain it in such a way that makes me stop and have an a-ha moment! Basically your videos are always on point and helping me understand these attachment dynamics so clearly! Thank you!!
I can relate. Once, I accidentally let one go at the table during dinner with friends. Although everyone else was a little taken aback by it, they thought it was funny - but my mother let me have it for doing that. She shredded me up one side and down the other because she thought I had done it on purpose.
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Today is the day I realize why I felt this huge guilt/shame towards everyone, everything ALL THE TIME. I’ve been through that kind of childhood you mentioned. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you too - sending you love, healing and understanding.💜🙏
One type of shame is feeling the need to put on a good face outside the family, when things like parental drunkenness and rage happen behind closed doors. It leads to loneliness, thinking there is no one you, as child, could turn to for understanding or help.
Shame can weirdly go the other way, too, with people who don’t have a house shaming a person for having a house, or women shaming women for being perceived by others as being beautiful and not playing themselves down. It’s like, “You should give up what you have to make me feel better that I don’t have it, and if you don’t you’re a bad selfish person.” People sometimes shame others to manipulate them.
Thank you kindly for your videos. My family probably affected me from the start because my mother was probably undiagnosed BPD and had severe postpartum depression, so I probably even learned stuff from a baby. I also strongly recommend anyone to try DBT if they are interested, it's not just for Borderline. I have CPTSD and it was only in paying attention to my thoughts and patterns that I heard my mother's voice behind them all, just like what Dr. Sage just said. Peace to everyone
Thank you so much for sharing this with others! Peace to you and your heart too!:)
I appreciate all the information you have given us for free. I've been diagnosed with BPD and toxic shame is a huge part of what's wrong with me.
You are such a kind and caring human being. Thank you for the energy you transmit through your videos. The content is great but your presence makes all the difference! ❤️
I watch a lot of other psychologists talk about trauma and related topics on YT, and you are seriously one of the best! Sometimes when you explain something that I’ve already heard before, you explain it in such a way that makes me stop and have an a-ha moment! Basically your videos are always on point and helping me understand these attachment dynamics so clearly! Thank you!!
I wish i could have a therapist like you. I relate to this so much!!!
I'm loving this Wildy Loved series
You are so welcome! Thank you so much for being here and for letting me know! It means so much to me.:)
Mom never let me break some thing it was the end of the world.
I can relate. Once, I accidentally let one go at the table during dinner with friends. Although everyone else was a little taken aback by it, they thought it was funny - but my mother let me have it for doing that. She shredded me up one side and down the other because she thought I had done it on purpose.
We call it "labeling" in CBT
Thank you
Thank you too🙏💜