Who are you, really? The puzzle of personality | Brian Little | TED
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 18 июл 2016
- Visit TED.com to get our entire library of TED Talks, transcripts, translations, personalized talk recommendations and more.
What makes you, you? Psychologists like to talk about our traits, or defined characteristics that make us who we are. But Brian Little is more interested in moments when we transcend those traits - sometimes because our culture demands it of us, and sometimes because we demand it of ourselves. Join Little as he dissects the surprising differences between introverts and extroverts and explains why your personality may be more malleable than you think.
The TED Talks channel features the best talks and performances from the TED Conference, where the world's leading thinkers and doers give the talk of their lives in 18 minutes (or less). Look for talks on Technology, Entertainment and Design -- plus science, business, global issues, the arts and more. You're welcome to link to or embed these videos, forward them to others and share these ideas with people you know.
Follow TED on Twitter: / tedtalks
Like TED on Facebook: / ted
Subscribe to our channel: / ted
TED's videos may be used for non-commercial purposes under a Creative Commons License, Attribution-Non Commercial-No Derivatives (or the CC BY - NC - ND 4.0 International) and in accordance with our TED Talks Usage Policy (www.ted.com/about/our-organiz.... For more information on using TED for commercial purposes (e.g. employee learning, in a film or online course), please submit a Media Request at media-requests.ted.com 
Наука
“As an introvert I might gently allude to certain assholic qualities”
Both the most introverted and extroverted thing I’ve ever heard
That was so relatable, ive been in that situation so many times and its very funny to hear someone else speak of it
Called 'bathos', it is
I'm still laughing and I agree with you.
Ambiverted *
introverts often avoid confrontation because they are at a disadvantage and its overstimulating
Imagine having him as a teacher! I would be in class everyday captivated
He seems like a tough grader.
yes exactly
nieceypiecey100 honestly these teachers make me want to learn even more to get good grades
Joseph Karani ahahha so true but he’s just so fascinating
Idk I kinda find this guy boring, if he was my professor I'd ditch class so much he wouldn't even know who I am 😂
I was one of those fortunate enough to have him as a professor at Carleton University in the 90s. Best. Class. Ever. He had a profound impact on me and I still remember an astonishing number of details from his lessons. I still find myself quoting him in my daily life. I have never been so thoroughly entertained and enlightened at the same time. I gave him a Thank You card when I graduated, expressing my gratitude for what he gave me. Being his student was truly a gift. Not only was he exceptionally brilliant, but his ability to teach through stories is unparalleled and his ability to humanize experience remarkable. I'm so glad he's still sharing himself with the world though TED. If you're reading this Dr. Little, may I once again say Thank you. The world is a better place because you're in it.
thanks you so much for this story :-)
What was one of his best quotes that you really appreciated?
This was good to read and uplifting to once again recall , how humans used to appreciate one another and the gifts interpersonal relationships bestow and bequeth
This was a really nice comment to read, as someone below said. I guess Professor Little Really goes beyond his introvert nature to have made such an impression on you and undoubtedly others. Lucky you to have been his student, and lucky him to have had a student so expressive of their gratitude.
@@mrnice757012:09 😮
My procrastinating starter pack : open RUclips,watch TED talk, telling myself I'm learning English so it's okay to procrastinate more when I have a lot of assignments not done yet
Who dat in ur pfp . Also SaME!
@@anikapatel810 it's INFINITE Nam Woohyun 🥰
@@ithinkyourehotheaded8495 did you watch his drama highschool love on? 🥺
@@anikapatel810 yess ofc that's drama make me become a kpop fans 💛
You tube the home of procrastination. Lived the TED talk about it was insightful and made me feel not alone
Me before watching the video: It's too long it may be boring
Me after watching the video: No come back explain more
Mahta Jr I am sending it to everyone I know.
come join Twitch, there's a great Life Coach there www.twitch.tv/yourfavoritelifecoach/videos
M not able to understand can u explain me this lil what actually is said in this vedio
This is me with every TEDtalk I watch
I know but he's on the John, let's just not talk to him for a while.
He is so serious about pooping alone that he prepared a whole TED speech for it.
None dares to step foot on same level in my house when I battle count dookoo.
😂This was so unexpected...
...In the best of ways 👊😎🔥
As a fellow solo pooper, he would hit it off real well with Rick Sanchez from "Rick and Morty."
I TURDED HAHA
💩
😂😂
He talked for 15 minutes without slide show and still kept attention retention from all audience and also us online, this is a true professor! Thanks for sharing this Brian Little!
“Your personality is not who you are.”
This quote has sat with me for a long time, and has helped me focus on inner dialogue versus outward expression.
**As a side note, the quote derives from the lectures of Dr. Gabor mate; he provides more context into those dynamics of personality that can cause a misidentify, etc.
have you read the untethered soul!!
@@nternetrat ohhh I have not! I will look into it!
well it is. that’s literally the definiton of the who you are
"The Untethered Soul" was great. Very good wisdom on changing one's perspective on how we limit ourselves and how to adopt new attitudes towards our potential for navigating emotions. I just finished Oliver Burkeman's "Four Thousand Weeks." It's a fascinating read about limited time in this life and has great suggestions on how to think in different ways in order to free yourself from the anxiety of missing out on life. A very "Live in the Moment" type book.
@@nternetratnzgldaklfglgjdjgadl,
/778jdlagaglkgnBfahlgajflaljsakldgvgSLHgNZlfjaasjlfsa, gMVdakhggklafgkvaldmkdlnfasggalhdklxnlc💕🤣🙂🤣😇😇😊lgjdalalBXglbdfsanlcsndnlal all lachslhasggslkxhpdahadkllkdahAdhklvhadlkmxvafahlazlvahzv gsflandgklGcl dg ldgaavah? KdhaklfgmdglaglgadasjlfgajldflhsasbfzLHvjlgad fjzlaclnZNClngxghlkdhahlnclsalnnZhlajlagsjllvXCXLHsba
“We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.”
Who said that?
Kurt Vonnegut
DFTBA
I want to be the Christian God. Guess I better start slaughtering billions, and enslaving the masses while preaching about kindness.
Faye S
If you want to be *Catholic.
Watching this made me realise i need to improve my vocabulary
💯
Same .. I’m 23 I “always” talk under my breath .. been doing this for years now . Idk what it is .
truee😩
Me too,
You must be an extrovert learning the ways of an introvert :)
It started out so playful and interesting. But when he got real: "you've been to the hospital 3 times and they still don't know what's wrong," I shed a tear in response to how genuine his demeanor had become. Then seconds later he had me laughing. Thank you sir, for laying your real self out there for the world to see.
Funny how I’ve been to the hospital three times just to get away from the world. Lol! I just sat there the last time and read a couple books. Lol!
@@mariahconklin4150 you good?
@@mariahconklin4150 shorts err ky t shirt vvy y t shirt for men are you ee3xxxxxxee
😅
Brian Little is my uncle and although he and my aunt divorced many years ago and I have not seen him for decades I have fond memories of conversations with him. He was always so engaging, brilliant and funny. He remains a wonderful speaker and I really enjoyed listening to him once again.
Hello
Of course they did. Every intellectual loves divorce.
He got emotional at his hospital analogy and it made part of my heart crack
Yea. I felt it. Because I relate to it.
Yeaa
ikr
i thought it was just my imagination...
I caught that too
I'm a social introvert. I find it hardest to be in groups where I don't know the people (well). With my friends, I may seem to be extroverted, but the interaction still drains me and I need to be alone quite a lot.
Nothing pisses me off more than when somebody wants to hang out when I just saw them a day ago
I’m the same way.
i can't agree with you more. i never be the one who break the ice first. being alone makes me more comfortable. whenever i don't spend time for myself, it's really exhausted
same here, is it bad to b introvert ? cz i get problems everytime im involved in society
OMG...this the the definition of being me.
So lucky to have had him as a teacher. He changed my life.
May I know where did you have him as your teacher?
Techer changed his life so he can Comment on His revision classes...!!
I really love the way how this professor sees people and their life. ❤
how lucky are those students to be taught by this man!
I wholeheartedly agree!
how sad is the fact we have to celebrate a few of the smart people left alive
+Googol yeah, we should celebrate ALL of the smart people left alive, which would be everyone alive, everyone brings something to the table, and leaves somethings at home
Bryan Goodyear what makes you sure you are not being emotionally offended by my comment and just spewing an unreasonable argument?
I got a better teacher *_*
As an introvert who really likes words, the way he speaks is like crack
I hope this guy has youtube videos about his classes.
@Ben Kahrmann bit late ain't it?
@Ben Kahrmann neither have I but a guy can dream mkay
true
💀
You can really see the happiness in him when the crowd laughs at his jokes. :') made my day so much better
I really love how he speaks and how he delivered his speech, He always has my attention even when he's just standing still on stage.
You my friend..!! True true lover.!
I have not enjoyed a TED Talk this much in a long time. He's perfect, his humor, professionalism, speech.
+1!
And this is done by someone who doesn't enjoy doing it, especially out of character like he said. And boy that was out of character. Must've been so liberating, that he may even become an extrovert now lol
ur an introvert aren't you
That is his "personal project" as he would call for it.
he dedicates his time and energy in order to come out with this amazingly polarizing and informative video.
This mans vocabulary is bigger than texas
😂agreed, but love it.
ethan cain cannot agree more.
Yes ♥
It’s an average college level vocabulary. It’s actually not that impressive.
The Real Slim Brady source?
i myself, am an introvert, but i had to act extrovert in front of some people, especially my family
so when he talked about it, i was so relieved that I'm not alone in it.
thank you sir for taking your time and sharing your speech with us!
Thank you, Dr. Little! I am analyzing your conversation for a class (Personality- Psychology II) and it is amazing the way you explain personalities and traits! A remarkable point, introverted can be a GREAT speaker and Professor!
HOLD UP, I want to take this professors class. Professors like him are the reason I love learning!!!
I really like learning. It gives me goosebumps ,every time I hear or see something meaningful, interesting and strong based theory. I sometimes really want to know what was the reason or drive that people had to come to that solutions and how it becomes possible. It is so fun learning something new or interesting. I want to be in that professor's class.
Right!!! I would love my class so much if he was my teacher
And you fall in love quite probably, right :)
I am not what I think I am, I am not what you think I am. I am, what I think you think I am. ( A perception of a perception )
Thomas Cooley
Exactly!
Can't be more accurate
nice
thats facts, I hate the feeling that I am acting out a character that I see in the eyes of the people around me. Like a shiver, I try to shrug it off and forget it
I absolutely loved every detail he gave, you can really learn a lot from this man. I have not enjoyed a TED talk such as this one in a long time!
Thank you professor! Not just for validating my feeling uncomfortable being around people who are hyper compared to the silence I find comfort in but the persona or pseudo-extroversion that we exhibit to make things easier to understand to people who otherwise cannot comprehend the mental gymnastics that we naturally prefer. Thank you again
Someone once said that a person has 3 faces. 1 you show the world 2 you show to your family and your friends 3 is one you dont show to anybody.
Covert Farts there should only be one!! Otherwise sheeple are living a lie!!
Me right now, and its killing me
@@kustom13rods In order to be functional in a society, all people constantly lie and pretend. That is an observed fact.
Oh man, I have three face for the outside world, two for my mom, and one for me.
Covert Farts, I agree but that's not why I'm replying. You have the best name I've seen on RUclips.
Ted talks always make you think hard about your life
not always, not being sexist(said every sexist ever) there have been some bad & disliked feminist ted talks
Ted talks is the best in-flight entertainment content
to be honest - you should think hard about your life on your own regardless of what TEDs say
Feminists show?Give me link!
Deus Grande just select "most popular" on the TED videos page
Just amazing. Made me cry when he spoke of the reasons he would exemplify specific traits. It's your child, or mother. Just as hard as it can hit.
I’ve been having a lot of trouble with identifying my own personality and my own individuality. This made me feel a little bit better. What a sweet professor. I hope he is well.
The REAL issue with personality traits is they're never constant. Everyone's identity is in perpetual flux, too slowly to notice in real time, but we all feel the disconnect when we look at old photos of ourselves, showing evidence of a personality we no longer identify with... We all know our bodies completely regenerate on a cellular level around every decade or so, no doubt some process of change takes place in the brain's architecture and encoded data as well, perhaps responsible for the slight variations in our personal identities as we grow and live.
Michael Weinberger thoughtful approach sir
hi
Michael Weinberger our personalities don't change our habits do
...the only thing constant is that absolutely everything that exists is in a constant state of super slow, nearly non perceivable change. One particle replaced at a time, over years or centuries. Everything vibrates, changes state, moves from one thing or place or molecular makeup to the the next.
...Our personalities and our habits are synonymous. You could even say they equally influence each other. Our habits are just a file in our personality folder, a single brick in a much larger wall, and our personality dictates the habits we form, like a kind of psychological-physiological feedback loop. For example, chronic nervousness is a personality trait, whereas nail biting is a habit, but in this case the nervous personality drives the individual to bite their nails, and in turn that nail biting becomes a part of their personality. So when the slow changes in our personality occur, the same are equally taking place within our habitual exercises throughout life.
there's days when, as an introvert, you feel odd, misplaced, not fitting in, alone with how you feel. And then you watch this and you feel like it really is perfectly OK just the way you are. Thank you so much Brian for this talk. And of course making it blatantly clear how limited my vocabulary is to yours.
Novelistus on the water and then you go back to feeling misplaced again.
Novelistus on the water or Sir Derek Jacobi
So learn vocabulary in life it gets you far...but always turn your tongue twice...before talking
@@myriamfersing7935 I am working on that, every day.
Not really. I still feel alone and out of place
I've watched Brian's talk many times, it is one of my fondest moments of learning, laughing and relatability. I am an introvert, but feel nowadays after the loss of someone very close, the urge to socialise, be part of a group, and especially spend time and deepen my relationships with close ones. This is in a sense quite representative of the fact that introverts are not necessarily antisocial. I don't feel antisocial, but the opposite. I need to build close and deep relationships. Maybe the only differences in socialising is what we want to create in terms of relationship, and how long it takes to create it. Thank you so much Pr. Little for the inspiration, and the laugh.
Fantastic! And he is true to what he said, he is a true introvert in every sense of the word... He didn’t even turn to see the standing ovation he got at the end. This guy is amazingly outstanding!
This whole speech was a setup to make nobody follow him to the bathroom. Nice.
Matt Hubbell And to exhibit certain aasholic qualities
Matt Hubbell sn
Brilliant!!!
Not comfortable with his sexual and bathroom remarks. I must be an introvert.
SooDoneWithYou ----🤣🤣🤣EXACTLY. HE SPENT ALL THIS TIME UP ON STAGE PREPARING EVERYBODY TO TELL THEM NOT TO FOLLOW HIM. LOL!!!👍👍👍👍👍🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I’m an introvert when you first meet me but I like to act as an extrovert and make conversations just to avoid awkward situations. Once I get to know you, I’m an extrovert but I keep my emotions to myself basically appearing emotionless... anyone?
That's what I used to do for the longest time, be extroverted to prevent 'awkward' situations. But it was so mentally and physically draining for me. The reason I used quotes was because it was never awkward for me, I was just worried about the other person feeling awkward. Now if I want to be quiet, I'll be quiet, if people feel awkward around me they can leave or get used to it
@@JorgeRodriguez-if1kx same
Me
Same
Quite the opposite for me
Thank you, Dr. Little for answering questions about "who am I, really". Actually, I've done tests that say I'm an extrovert but I also feel introverted tendencies because I often analyze things in depth, enjoy alone time well, and don't have as many friends as other extroverts. Until I thought "this test is not accurate" even though the results showed extroverts up to 3 times. Because of this video, I know who or what type of personality you are is not a barrier for you to do things you like or enjoy. We're more than introvert / extrovert kind of person. What makes difference and sense are these free traits and the way we enact and create a script in order to advance our core project in our life.
This has been both inspiring and informative in a very confusing way. Love the cadence, the voice, the accent, the humour. I feel grateful for this.
Hold on lemme just get my dictionary
Teclinsoro 😹😹😹 felt the same way
Same I had to Google 5 words lmao
Really?
@@MP-cv6if they might not be a native english speaker 😀
@@serafinasmith209 it's more likely that they are native. Any non native who is commenting on this video has obviously learnt English very carefully, while natives usually don't feel that they need to specifically enlarge their vocabulary in their native tongue, because they are _naturals_
It's the same when it comes to me and my native language
i think because introverts are so attentive and have such an ability to observe and take in, we could act as extroverts and seem like a true extrovert, but an extrovert couldn't play as an introvert so well.
I mean.... It's really not hard to be an introvert lmfao. All you have to do is learn how to entertain and gain energy from doing things alone.
everyone learns and adapts. extroverts can come across as introverts aswell, they just read the room and show introvert traits when needed.
@@zeynand4039 true true, i forgot i commented this haha, i probably wouldn't have now, oh well
@@TheArtOfBrooke I mean it kind of makes sense what you said lol
The extreme Introvert learned to be an extrovert and plays the extrovert better than most extroverts.
When I go out to social events I usually quite enjoy myself but I need a day or two after to get back on track - I get annoyed, extremely tired and grumpy. I never actually thought that was a thing that happened to other people. But when he was talking about how he needs time to recuperate from interactions with other people I felt so reminded of myself. Feel a lot better now
*I’m 50 years old living in California.I’m hoping to retire at 55 if things keep going well for me. Bought my first house last month and I can’t be more proud that I’m now. I’m glad made a great decision about my finances that change me forever*
Hey sorry for late response , I apparently I used the FIRE movement to put my finances in shape, you can research more about it,then invest in stock ,forex trading , real estate through the assistance of investment pro Expert Mrs Harry Ava
... but Professor Slughorn, did you tell the same thing to Tom RIddle when he had questions?
there you go buddy
you speak my mind..
😂😂 i was thinking he resembles someone but i wasn't able to find out who
"Tom was a lovely boy but a little scary. I had to act extroverted so that he wouldn't realize how creeped out I was."
OMG thats who he looks like :O
SlightysBack I'm curious... are you guys intro or extroverts ?
@@JarvisPen Oh my gosh! I laugh so hard at your comment! How can you be so like that? I do feel like admiring you now
I can in fact lick the outside of my own elbow. Just saying. It’s not that hard. All you have to do is completely destroy your shoulder.
Oh man 🤣🤣
I can as well, but it's because I have a long neck and hyper-mobility syndrome
It's easy.. especially when You have a long toungue.. :D
Aaron Kline lol
Love this humor😂
I haven’t tried college yet, mainly because school sounds like a drag and I never liked it much. But if I had this man as my professor I would absolutely LOVE going to his lectures everyday and learning something new. Great content
this is so comforting and accurate. i love listening to ted talks, and this is one of those i loved most. he understands people all so well. it's an amazing speech, and I'd listen to it several times.
He reminds of Professor Slughorn or my version of him when read the books
potwhovian yeeees !! he reminds me of him so much too
In mine, he was a baldie and had a 'stache
Oh my God yeeeess!!!
I act like an introvert but I'm actually an extrovert. I like communicating with peoole but i have social anxiety, and when I beat my anxiety i always feel happier & better after talking with people.
I feel lonely and lost when I don't talk to anyone and I hate it
If you're lonely, check out meetup.com I have social anxiety too and this has helped me.
shnglbot Thankyou :)
Nayeli Orozco Sounds like you also have high neuroticism then.
Nayeli Orozco because of me being bipolar I tend to push people away and I also have anxiety and yeah it keeps you away but when I work I am extrovert around people so I don't get it lol
It's one of the most amazing speeches I have come across in a long while. It made me more clear as to who i am as an introvert and most importantly as a person. Thank you❤️
You can really tell he knows exactly how to handle the crowd. It was an extraordinary speech. Well done!
What a delightful man
Michele Totton You're an introvert
Very nice talk! I tend to be 'mistaken' for an extravert because of the way I interact with people (yes, I can be loud). However, I identify as an introvert because I don't /need/ social interaction (I can go without for weeks and be fine) and I need time to recover after social events.
I relate to that. When I'm out with friends I'm very engaged and "act" pretty extraverted. But it comes in bursts. Currently spending a week to myself aside from work of course, just to recover from a good week of using up my bursts. Then people get confused because I seemed so down to hang out and then suddenly "fall off the face of the earth" for a bit.
+Jay Cuneo Im so glad somebody said this, I tend to be the most bubbly or eccentric in a social group but i tire easily and need at least a week away to recover. Its almost as if people are magnets and somehow pull my energies down.
moggycat99 Yep! Totally get you. The hardest part is when friends don't quite understand it or are inclined to take it personally. Some understand or even relate, but to others its like speaking a different language lol.
I'm curious, do you also get people "drawn" to you? I also find strangers or acquaintances in person opening up to me... seemingly random too. I get told "I've never told anyone that" or "Wow I don't know why but I felt like I could share with you". I've had friends find it strange if they are around when it happens and I'm all "Oh that? Thats normal for me". Maybe thats part of why its mentally exhausting
+Jay Cuneo have you taken the mbti test? you sound like an infp or infj. I myself am an infp and I always find that people tell me their secrets without even meaning to do so. since I am an introvert, in my adult life I have come to terms with that, and I seam to only befriend introverts. and introverts always (almost always) understand that I need time to myself :)
Malin Wahlberg I have! INFJ I am :)
I wonder if its the higher lean on INF part combined that makes our "vibes" so approachable for more emotionally intimate conversations. We are the can opener to someone's beans type deal. I always got scores between 80-90% for I over E. I sometimes just say I have BHC condition. Borderline Hermit Crab. Or SRC, Semi Reclusive Compulsion.
Sometimes its quite nice to feel that a purpose was served to someone else though. They got something off their chest, or felt a safe haven in our conversation. Judgment free zone. Interesting to hear others stories too. Snippets of the human condition from another set of eyes. But then, I must seclude away for a while to clear the mind of all that
"when we act protractedly out of character, we may find that we don't take care of ourselves" amen to that
Watching this made me realize and understand how we human beings really work, our mechanism. This is impressive, and honestly I'm in awe of his wisdom, and the ability to explain things in a funny, lovely and wise way♥️♥️♥️ now got the best answer to my question that why we keep just analyzing each other like this way( what kind of person you're!? Or what is your favorite whatever??!) i guess we're a composition of many traits, that leads to this person you're dealing with.. We're more than introvert /extrovert kind of person... What makes difference and sense are these free traits and the way we enact and create a script in order to advance our core project in our life. Thankful for professor little for this amazingly helpful guide
As a non nativ english speaker... yes he is using language that sometimes far surpasses my limited understanding, but HOLY MOLY just listenting to such a charismatic person with this amount of profound knowledge is more than enaugh.
enough*
native*
As a native speaker his vocab is nutty bro!
I agree with you. as a non native English speaker, I stopped many times this TED talk to search in my dictionnary. after 4 round trips, I began to doubt of my English capacities 😂.
@@johannek8380 same here, but at least I'm grateful that I could learn some new words. :D
Why can't we have teachers like him?
It's like a walking audiobook.
It's because he knows he is not Teaching..!! He knows That he need He is just playing his game hard .!!
hi, I am from India and you
There was a time when all teachers were like him. Now they are all part of the bandwagon bunch and try to spread the status quo indoctrination, not education.
I’m glad to have a teacher like him in my school! It’s so fabulous to communicate and listen this type of people who always can tell you right information ( moreover, it will be explain with bright emotions) and if you have some problems she’ll 100% supports you and tell different examples from her own life in the same situations. It’s so so wonderful and amazing!
This is by far THE BEST Ted talk I've ever come across. His speech is extremely funny as well as educating and I would only be very glad to attend his class at 8 in the morning
I could listen to this man talk for hours, extremely captivating and well spoken. Loved this.
thank you Brian
This guy is an awesome orator. I would love to be in one of his classes.
Google and dictionary’s would be my best friend is I was in them at class
the recharge for an introvert is true. whenever we have family reunion, I would feel so much headache that I need to sneak out and take a rest then come back lol
i think if we are conscious and let the things happen next time, it will be comfortable in big gathering as well.
Omg this is a big yes for me the dirtiest work in the English language is.....visit!
Im exactly the same.
Same pinch💯
Me too
Just brilliant! As a human being who is known to be agreeable, conscientious, open, extraverted, and on an occasion, particularly due to a very stressful situation, a bit neurotic, I found Dr Little to be especially captivating. Thank you
Currently pursuing my MBA at LSUS. My prof gave this as part of an assignment for our Organizational Behavior Class. I must say I thoroughly enjoyed this video!
I want to be like him someday. The fact that he gave a speech and it just makes you rethink how you look at life.
how are you doing?
@@realcorrupt.1 how're you doing
Here's the thing, there are hybrids. There are those of us who easily float between both worlds
Ambiverts :) me
Yes us
Thats human. Introvert vs extrovert is the dumbest, most stratifying conversation
More like a spectrum? You can't be an introvert-extrovert hybrid without contradicting yourself. Most people don't stand in the extremes, but close to the middle, still leaning towards the other side. This is how the concept of ambiverts came to be, wich I think isn't necessary since we can't be both introverted and extroverted.
Us thats me
This video and the comment section has made me realize how much of an introvert I was, I literally don't see the point in people liking to interact with others and liking loud places with a lot of people it also made realize how much I love extroverts not only because they carry the conversation but they also give me energy and I'm happy around them
I have seen this talk like dozens times in last 5 years but still I am quite intrigued to watch it again
Watching this relaxing on Christmas Day. I'm an introvert. I prefer conversations that have meaning instead of the surface talk. I do it more for others comfort to compromise
Me to Debbie nice to know that I am not the only one love meaningful conversations as I am very very extremely introvert and I wish for you from my bottom of my heart a happy life God bless you.
@@maxiswordofficial5486 lol there are tonnes of people who prefer meaningful conversation over small talk, in fact most probably...
r/iamverysmart
Same day... Just 2 years apart🤣🤣🤣🤣
I love those kinds of conversations too but my experience is it usually leads to alienation and awkwardness
What a great professor he must be! What a remarkable presentation!
www.twitch.tv/yourfavoritelifecoach/videos for great mental health psychological livestream, join Twitch!
Im studying cognitive functions rn and u guys dont know how happy i am watching this. everything he said was so accurate it made me want to learn human behaviors more
For some reasons I watched this video again and again. He explained exactly what i always asked myself - why do i need so much energy to heal myself anytime after acting in extrovert-way?!
Thank you Brian!
Asking somebody what their "Personal Project" is might be a much better way to get to know them than "What do you do for a living?" or "What are you studying in school?" Ask about what they're truly after, not just what they do or want to do to pay their bills.
this tore thru my skin and laid bare my loneliness. damn
Though I don't imagine that would be a good question to ask right off the bat..
This comment is so underrated🔥
That's what I would like to do. Although, people often dislike it when questions are phrased in such a manner.
Zela Morre 👏🏼👏🏼👌🏼
Thank god for the extroverted female.
And this TED Talk.
the real mvps
Thank god for females in general.
Intro men; 3 Extro men; 5.5 Intro women 3 Extro women; 7.5
As I recall.
Dunning Kruger
I haven't seen that TED talk, is it a good one?
+Zach Albers
Other women. DUH.
What an absolutely brilliant man. So intelligent, well spoken, genuine and funny :)
I almost cried at the end. Beautiful.
Introvert here, but I spend most of my day pretending I'm extroverted so that I come off as "normal." I'm really good at it, but I hate it. I'd rather not talk to anyone most days, but school and work demand it, so....
Agree. I feel like most people that are in my area are Extroverts, and that fact overshadows the fact that Introverts exist and so it becomes the population of everyone.
That's sounds more like being antisocial, not introverted. Introverts who are not antisocial still enjoy the company of others and talking to people, they just generally can't do it for extended periods of time and they need their alone time to recharge.
@@saratrejo6658 Leaving aside the fact that antisocial is different from asocial, if the alone time is seen as unhealthy or something you have to avoid it if you want to appear "normal".
No alone time => no recharge => hate for the draining activity because you are empty
it's so fucked up.
I'm an introvert and I used to feel like I had to pretend to be someone else for everyone else. Today, even at work if my coworkers invite me somewhere I politely decline because I'd rather be home than with people engaging in meaningless conversations. Extroverts don't get it, but I could care less.
Tip: Born an introvert, be like that for first 20-25 years of life. Introverts observe things much better so you'll learn a lot.
Then slightly shift to be a little extrovert get used to switching from one to another.
Choose where to be extrovert where to remain silent and observant.
Congratulations, now you can rule the life.
how did you slightly shift to be a little extroverted? Also, what do you mean by slightly extroverted, could u give examples
Minnoli Dalal You become extroverted by practicing. You can go out and plan to speak to so many people. Ask where something is in the grocery store. Say something about the fruit. Give a compliment, that’s super easy. Practice speaking to people without a real need, and as it becomes easier you can then begin to start speaking to people for longer. Keep the conversation going, just smile, nods at what they say, give eye contact, if you can’t think of anything to say- ask a question using the last few words they said, laugh a forgetfulness or lack of words etc. Being introverted doesn’t have to mean being a social hermit. It just means you like your me-time. When in doubt pretend to be someone extroverted you know personally and ask yourself what would they do. Good luck!
Wooo ambiverts
Nevaeh Serena i can’t believe no one called you out yet on how you copy and pasted a comment
Also, to the first comment, it’s not that easy, pal. I’ve always considered myself an extrovert but very recently i realized i never enjoyed being one when it was quarantine; it was like an epiphany to who i was. But yeah that’s a good solution I do suppose.
Not at all how that works 😂
This was an amazing talk. I like the humorous way this man has to explain the terminology so that we can understand it. Great video! One of my favorite ones!
His students are very fortunate to have him as their professor. Awesome Talk 💜
I am an extreme introvert and everything he said is on point. I tried and pretended to be an extrovert in college because I thought it would be easier to go through college if I was popular and had more friends. Though I did make a few great friends, I also attracted tons of toxic ones and it's stressful and draining so I just decided to just be true to myself, and I have been happier and more at peace ever since. Most people misunderstand introverts and tend to be put off by our personality. It seems introverts are often perceived to be unfriendly, boring, shy, or snobbish but those who are more informed and try to connect would find that introverts are just calculating, equally daring but reserved, and definitely not shy. Shyness is NOT introversion.
Exactly! It gets to a point where extroverts are just draining.
Thankss for this @Echo Echo
Haha, So true
i almost always dont initiate conversation with people, hence they think he's so shy
But once i made good friends with them, they get to know me true colours 🌚
Hmmm I kinda blame the society.. it’s just like more easy for extrovert to live in
@@mariahconklin4150 I grew up as an extrovert during my primary/elementary school years, and I saw nothing wrong with extroverts. I thought that their energy was amazing, and I thought that I would always stay an extrovert. However, once I got to middle school and high school, I realized that extroverts were just psychos.
Is waking up at 7 in the morning and going to school at 8am for 5 days in a row not enough for you to realize that we're stuck with this routine for about 7 years of our lives, and that it can get exhausting? I learned this the hard way when I got to my freshman year of high school.
Every single extrovert I came across was the exact same: they were doing too much too early, never knew when to shut up, always got in trouble because they didn't know how to behave themselves while doing quiet work, I can go on and on but I'm gonna stop here. It's just so repetitive and annoying.
The study of personality is more than extraversion vs. Introversion. I liked his Tedtalk but I wish he would have explored other factors.
Jaslynne Thompson I think he just wanted it to be accessible, relatable and fun. I have seen many big wig psychologists trying to explore broad concepts in short talks and I assure you it’s neither fun and neither is it informative......at times it can even be misleading.
There's this thing called a time limit...
Wow! How brilliant he is! It must be an honor & privilege to watch him talk in class.
Wow! this just describes my how being a fake extrovert for a long time has drained me ❤
You are doing the same here in the comments..!!🤷🏻♂️
Look up Alan Watts sometime. You can never know who "you" really are. Because there isn't a real you. You cannot describe yourself in the now without relating yourself to what you have done in the past, or what your interests are -which are things you would rather be doing and goes around the question of describing who you are in the now. We all share that in common. Fun stuff to think about.
Love Alan Watts!
Carl Jung is another great thinker
Agreed! :)
Thanks! This guy is amazing! I am listening to him now :)
RUclips: u4Qp_q-PqAc
primovid I haven't seen that one, watching it now. Thanks :)
Alan Watts, Terrence McKenna, Adyashanti, and Mooji are all thinkers on this subject who I think really captured something fascinating in their talks.
I love this dude. :( What an eloquent, lovable, hilarious, intellectual person.
Its midnight, I'm cramming for my module. I was supposed to watch this last week, I am so grateful he has such a way with words that even though I'm tired I laughed along and every word sunk in!
I love when some people can talk so much Essence and still keep it Light :) thank you.. I too have many personal projects
"Im going to bathroom, dont follow me" *drops mic* .
also, word of the decade is "assholic"
In the german language we have this word since the 1910s. Arschlöchig.
Absolutely love it! The vocabulary, the extreme detail of every little thing, this man’s ability to be both funny and serious... I seriously want more from him because I feel that he could change a person’s way of thinking with few words.. let alone a big speech. I also love the shared personal experiences to reinforce his statements. The ending experience was absolutely hilarious and it left me with the biggest smile ever!
People often feel you’re not an introvert because you’re not acting like an antisocial. You are engaging in conversations. However, being an introvert has different shades. I was insulted once because I said I am an introvert by someone close to me. It took a big hit on my mind and gaslighted me to question my perception about myself. I didn’t say an word to him (because I am an introvert). Today I came across this video and it was really comforting.
This talk just touched my heart like no other .
Thank you Dr. Little as extremely introverted myself, you healed me, in a way that nothing could. Watching this video was therapeutic.
I'm an introvert. I need my downtime and away from people. I function best 85% best away from people. I'm not anti social but, I do better.
Everyone needs downtime. I’m very extroverted and have to have days of downtime before ramping up to be a chatterbox the next day.
Same here
I wanted to make money... but I guess not?
What an amazing vocabulary, this man has a lifetimes worth of education and it shows.
Fantastic exploration and juxtaposition of our traits as introvert or extroverts or both ! Very nice to to hear him speak experience and expertise with funny lines . Thank you
i wish my teachers were more like him.
46th most boring person in this room. Come on, that was good!
Loved every bit, his vocabulary, content, humor and above all, a message conveyed. ❤
My favorite TED Talk so far! Thank you so much for sharing!