Whaaaa no, how dare she not provide details on her intimate life, I'm a long time sub which means we are basically friends! What's a toxic parasocial relation?
well for me it was different i was a lil gae boi (gae moment lol) and then i always wanted to be interested in the older guys (like 16+ older) and then middle school hit... and uhh... im still obsessing with the same exact guy :-) even though there probably 18 by now... welp rip for me ig lol
I like how a lot of ace/aro people (including myself at one point) are like “What’s wrong with me? Why am I not interested in anyone?” And Jaiden’s entire attitude is “What’s wrong with all of you? Why are you all so ugly?”
To be honest I feel both options! My friends refuse to believe me that I am aroace. Like I was so overwhelmed by this "I need a crush, think" I forced myself to like my favourite fictional character and told he is my crush.... One time I needed to explain that what a crush is... And lemme say... It didn't go well...
I’m not aromantic but i agree with the not-getting-why-being-just-friends-is-a-bad-thing point. Friendship rocks. No kisses i suppose, but still great Edit: this was not meant to cover every situation or be seen by many people at all, agh! I totally understand it being extremely painful when someone you have deep romantic feelings for doesn’t share them! I do think sometimes friendships, particularly male-female friendships, aren’t appreciated enough on their own unless they have the possibility of leading to a relationship. I was more trying to refer to that concept, though I realize I didn’t make that clear. I was sort of imagining a low-stakes situation of an acquaintance shooting their shot with another acquaintance (which could also be scary or embarrassing depending on the individual situation of course, but I figure it could also turn into a friendship if the awkwardness was surmountable). If you were rejected by someone you had romantic feelings for, I promise I’m not trying to dismiss that hurt, this comment was not meant to be universally applicable! And ending a friendship because it’s painful or awkward for this reason is absolutely not inherently a bad choice. Edit part 2: rewatching the video, I think I also should have phrased the sentence as understanding a feeling rather than agreeing with a point.
Having a mismatch in the level of care you have for someone hurts, it isn't insurmountable but it is an understanding reason for someone to be unable to maintain a friendship after they have been rejected. (this works for crushes, marriage proposals, friendships, acquaintances and probably many more examples of relationships between people)
This video was how I first learned about asexuality and it CHANGED MY LIFE! I’m so grateful to you Jaiden, I came out to my mom yesterday and I’ve never been so confident in my skin!
Congrats, and same! This video is the thing that opened my eyes and got me to look into asexuality. Now I've fully accepted that I'm aroace and have come out to everyone close to me, and my life has never made more sense.
@@lunalee3021 thinking the romance in certain movies and shows is dumb, and having a very, incredibly big hard time even understanding what romance of romantic love feels like is very different. I too think certain romances in shows are dumb and unnecessary, but I'm not aromantic, if anything I'm a hopeless romantic with my partner, if you're heterosexual, do you feel attraction to your same sex? No? Well imagine there is no person in the world with opposite sex, that's how it feels like to aromantics in a romantic way and to asexuals in a sexual way
@@lunalee3021 I don't think you understand what an identity is, y'know the thing that makes you, you? Being Asexual or Aromantic is part of an identity because it's who you are. The fact you didn't even consider it's existence is exactly why Jaiden' video was so important to the community; it sheds a light on us and tells people: "yeah, we exist, deal with it."
"I hope you can understand even just a little of what I talked about, and if not, I just hope you can be nice." Standing ovation for that line, honestly. So many people who don't understand something use that as a reason to dismiss or invalidate it, but not fully being able to comprehend something doesn't make it impossible to have compassion for those who do experience it. (As someone who is constantly confused by other people, I have firsthand experience in this.) Also, major kudos for the approach of this video. Using your platform to speak up for those who don't often feel seen is a really admirable thing to do, and maintaining boundaries of your own personal life at the same time is very respectable.
That “wait, they’re *not* joking??” moment is so accurate. This entire video describes what I was trying to figure out up until like a year ago. And the happiness of figuring it out, you’re not broken, this is a thing. It so upsetting in a good way? Relieving almost.
“No one presented to me OTHER options.” Wow, WOW this hit hard. It took me a long time to finally realize I was Ace, it was a revelation that being Ace was a legitimate THING and not just me being indecisive/selfish/weird.
Edit 2: Ok please stop giving advice in general actually, I guarantee I’ve already heard it. Edit: This comment is 2 years old. I appreciate all the advice, but I already know about Cupioromanticism. Please stop telling me. Ok, speaking as someone who is in High School and desperate for affection… Jaiden’s story about thinking “man I don’t have a crush on anyone, I guess I keep getting unlucky” really hit close to home… but I don’t think I’m aromantic? Because despite not feeling any romantic attraction I still deeply crave a romantic relationship, because theoretically, it sounds really nice and like something I would enjoy. And at this point I’m not sure if I’m just bad at identifying my own emotions, keep getting “unlucky”, or am somewhere on the aromantic/demiromantic spectrum.
I have been saying "I am sure I will feel love and affection if the right person comes along" for like the last 10 years. This kinda makes a lot more sense now.
@@Bella_bumble true that, ever since learning I am an ace, I have felt alone, and feel like nobody would understand me. It doesn't change me as a person, just makes me feel, that this is something my close people should know about, but have never had the confidence to say anything
@@Jeejune_Jx America is homophobic-af. I'm gonna be direct as can be and ask: Please help with that by watching and supporting Telltale Atheist, Forrest Valkai and of course also this video here.
My last girl friend learned that she was aroace, and didnt have any romantic attraction to me at all. She just saw us as really good friends, similar to that college person. We worked through it, and are now BFFs. I'm so proud of her ❤
Dude the “picking a crush out to feel like I’ve reached my emotional quota” is such a mood. I’m autistic and have always struggled feeling left out because I’ve never felt romantic attraction.
Literally SAME! It took me years to realize that my “crushes” on boys at school was really just the gender envy I had of masculine people… turns out I fall under the non-binary umbrella and just wanted to be more masculine. I don’t know if my neurodivergency has anything to do with inability to feel intense romantic attraction towards someone, but the thought of marrying someone and living with them forever just sounds… unpleasant.
As a straight man, I found this video not only informative but helpful to my personal understanding of relationships and whether it is that I want to be in one or I feel pressured to be in one. This is an amazing follow-up to a previous video of yours and I'm glad you were able to talk about things in ways that people don't necessarily do.
I agree, especially the part of “you can be happy on your own”, it’s something so basic but it stills hits really hard hearing it or trying make that sink in
As someone who figured out she was demiromantic a few years ago, the scanning your classmates to see if anyone has finally caught your eye hit soooo close to home. As does the picking someone random to have a crush on just to hit that milestone mark.
"So I made up a crush" is one of the most relatable things I've ever heard. I distinctly remember being in middle school and everyone talking about crushes and when I was asked about mine I just mentioned a close friend, and I did the same thing like a year later with someone else, and then the same when I got into high school, and I kept feeling like I wasn't doing something right. I eventually discovered I was aromantic and asexual but everyone around me was so weird about it. A teacher even told me "how are you going to teach your kids about sex if you've never had it?" Which- no comments honestly. I'm much happier now knowing exactly where I want my relationships to be and not stressing over which I'm expected to have. Great video Jaiden :) thanks a lot!
my best (female) friend is aromatic and asexual and i'm asexual (man). a lot of people asking if we're together/ a couple because we get along very well. some find it weird that we don't want to be a couple, like why don't you try it? you might like it. things like this, i find annoying because i find that these days everything needs to sexualized and romantised
@@Awesomeflame16 with some, maybe. i noticed that it's always with a man - woman relation, never with 2 men or women. so far i know nobody said too 2 men/ women that they should be together because they get along very well.
The whole “wait you guys weren’t joking???” Is the ace EXPERIENCE JDHDHD i remember the day i learned what asexual meant and instantly i felt so understood!
I'm demi and listen to a lot of country music, about half of all country music is "there was this very attractive girl who I talked to once, and I am now sad she's going away, because I love her" and I was always like "but... why?
Hi Jaiden! I had never understood your video because I'm Brazilian and I don't know much English, but after they posted a dubbed version I was able to understand the idea of your video and I was even able to identify with it! My whole life I thought I couldn't really understand the feeling of "falling in love", I thought I was being ridiculous or that people were just exaggerating when they talked about it, but now with this video I realized that I am actually aroace! Thank you very much for this video Jaiden❤
@@youcantakemehottogothese people spit offensive garbage for attention, Jacks dad got mocked, Markiplier’s niece got mocked, these trolls are just animals to be ignored as they scream for attention. Don’t let them drag you down. Jaiden Mark and Jack ignore them and so should we.
I know Jaiden referred this as the cliff notes version but honestly I learnt so much from this. This video is definitely going to help a lot of people out there :)
Figuring out youre aro or ace or both is so hard bc society really teaches you that you need to be in a romantic relationship and be intimate or you'll be sad and die alone.
ok but as someone who is lesbian can we just talk about those people who think if you say you are not straight then your automatically gay..like there’s more than just gay..there are so many different and unique sexualities too also great vid Jaiden!!
True, i guess due to the amount of people that talk about others / they are gay, the people only focus and know about only that one thing I am not sure, one thing that i know is that you are right, and that most people are stupid
Not many people know that.. it’s immature to assume everyone’s supposed to know everything. Many people grew up in households where topics like this aren’t even talked about. Most people don’t even know what LGBTQ+ means.. it’s our jobs to start educating people about these topics.
@ I know I’m just saying, Also cuz I told this one guy i was gay because I didn’t think he knew what lesbian meant and he did and called me stupid so um..🥲🥲
Oh my goodness "zero is equal to zero" is EXACTLY the reason I thought I was bi/pan for the longest time in highschool. I am also aro/ace and just thought everyone was doing the checklist thing too! Thank you so much for a well thought out video that is entirely relatable. I got a little teary eyed at the end!
I read somewhere that aromantics and asexuals were once accepted into the bisexual community before they had their own terms and definitions for that very reason!! The bis were like, "yup 0=0 so I guess you're one of us!" And thus began the vehement bi/ace/aro solidarity that persists today 🤝
Fun fact, back before asexual wasn't it's own sexuality because no one knew that that could happen, bisexuals actually welcomed asexuals into their community as their own because of this understanding.
Update: I sent this to my cousin, who has been trying to be supportive with me being aro/ace (the most supportive out of my family) and she immensely appreciated this video, as it explained things perfectly for her! Thank you again Jaiden for making this video.
This was literally my aroace awakening. This was the first time I heard of these terms and I was like, “OH. OHHHHH. That’s why everyone is unattractive.”
I’ve never heard someone articulate, how I’ve felt about being on the Ace spectrum before. The absolute - not lack of awareness, but the trouble processing that people actually feel an emotion you have never experienced. It’s really nice to hear it vocalized. Because while i’ve said it before to my friends, when someone isn’t Ace or Aro, it’s hard to understand you just exist without something society deems so important - It can be kind of isolating, existing in a world where you’re one of the odd people out? You’re the minority. It’s really amazing to see you make a video about this! And like epic pog for discovering what makes you feel comfortable with yourself! Watching this video made me just really warm and happy!! Thank you Jaiden! Congrats on finding yourself
It can be so hard to explain! The amount of times I've been told "You just haven't met the right person yet" has been so frustrating. The worst part being how that lack of understanding can make you second-guess yourself.
This might sound a little bit weird, but this video has become somewhat of a comfort point, because it is the only place in all of my life where I feel like someone understands me. My parents are normally really supportive, but when it comes to my being aro, they can't really understand what I mean so they're always telling me "Ah, you'll get married eventually!" I'm kinda hoping that if I click on this video more often RUclips might find some aroace content for me
God I know this animation is two years old; but having just tried to come out as ace, this is still so comforting to rewatch. It’s nice to know I’m not alone
At 25 my psychiatrist asked why I never was in a relationship and I countered with "How is that connected to my suicid attempt" His response was going on a long rant about the word of god and me looking up other psychiatrists mid session
It's especially annoying when you do tell someone multiple times that you don't want children or a bf/significant other and they laugh at you and tell you that you'll find someone one day. I want to focus on myself and the thought of being in a romantic relationship or having children grosses me out I want nothing to do with either of those things
It's almost as if we've created stereotypes for relationships and those stereotypes, according to society, MUST be fulfilled!! Otherwise we are absolute nobodies who will go nowhere. And if we go nowhere, we should not be happy. Or something along those lines.
@Random_gaming_FnAf lmao one kid once called me the f slur for being openly bi and obviously probably more queer than that surface fact so I slapped her and she never insulted me again lol
pleeeeease say aro and not ace when talking about relationships. i’m aro and not ace and asexual meaning aromantic is the biggest misconception that keeps anyone from ever realizing that aro people exist.
Ummm....? Literally...NOBODY...CARES about that stuff! Nobody thinks about what it means to love or if you need to be intimate to love. That crap is so trivial I'm honestly surprised someone like you managed to make it sound like an issue!
"It's none of your business" It's shocking how quickly people forget that. They carry on like your (lack of) orientation actually affects them personally. I sincerely hope none of your detractors have scared you away from continuing to make amazing content.
@Bad Editor To help other people who are feeling a similar thing using a large platform can help people to understand themselves if the creator is feeling something similar
@Bad Editor because the content creator chooses to share that info. Anything beyond what the creator chooses to share is nobody's business, that's the point. In Jaiden's case, she's helping to raise awareness about aro/ace, which a lot of people didn't know about (myself included). Jaiden gave a boost to the popularity of Nuzlockes and Mario Kaizo, so this video is sure to raise awareness about being aro/ace.
@Bad Editor This is because Jaiden wants to share this part of her personality to help us better understand her, but she doesn’t want to share more personal information.
it makes me so immensely happy that creators are talking about the subject of aromanticism, as it is almost never represented in media/irl. ty for talking about this and bringing light to it, as ive experienced it myself
can relate, i dont think ive found a single person attractive really, i would just look a few times because i liked that some people looked a bit similar to me and move on with my day like nothing happened
"We're all pretending to be adults here," is one of the best things I've heard in a while. That aside, it is lovely to see a video covering these topics. (:
Right?? We're all just Children at heart whether we live to be 90 or not. The difference is that, some folks that they're Children and LIVE life full of Vitality 'n all WHILE most pretend to be adults and get all bitter/grumpy due to responsibilities and "old age." It's anyone's pick honestly 🤣🤣
i dont identify as aroace, but as an autistic person, the feeling of "well everyone else is feeling this way now so i should probably start doing it too" without understanding thats not how feelings work is very real
As a fellow autistic one, I can relate to that. I try to but I often struggle with "experiencing feelings". It took me a long time to realize I had feelings for my girlfriend even though I've known her since childhood now because I was never in a relationship before and allways thought I have to instantly fall in love when I see the right one or something. I still have a lot to learn about relationships but I know that my best friend will be there for me, helping me learning about how to love, in a way.
I... Miiiiight be Autistic? I've never been diagnosed but the symptoms exist aaaand.... I used to feel the same way, trying to fit in without even knowing how to emotions I eventually gave up and decided to just give up and just... act like I want to despite everyone else's ideas and time I still wonder what the word "Crush" even means lol
Honestly idc, you make such good content and positive authentic energy. It’s your soul that matters (pls don’t make me a grim reaper), the good inside you.
I remembered talking about aromantic with a friend and he legit said “How does smelling nice make you LGBTQ?” because he had mistaken aromatic = aromantic 🤦🏻♀️
AYYY ME TOO, My family always tells me "that might change" and "I might have kids" and recently got out of a toxic relationship it's just nice hearing someone else say it's okay
I'm sorry about that, anything that happens will happen and if anyone is pressuring you to feel like you should have feelings for someone that can suck but they are not you and cannot understand you entirely
As a mom who started watching you many years ago and now my 10 year old son does i appreciate this video. We both watched it separately and then had a conversation about it. Thank you jaiden 💓
12:34 I don't know if this was intentional or not, but I love the idea of an aroace person expressing platonic affection and following it up with "no romo"
some people find it offensive to act like No Homo is just a funny thing to reference but yeah No Romo is very commonly said in the aro community as a joke about things
This video was 15 minutes of someone narrating and illustrating my entire life experience. The 'picking who to have a crush on', the 'this is a milestone I should be aiming for', the 'wait they're not joking?!'... all of it rang true. Thank you SO MUCH for making this video
For the longest time I thought I was gay because I never liked girls (and that's what society including my hom0phobic parents told me) But it just turns out I don't want to do anything to any person regardless of gender and sexuality lol.
Exactly! I used to think that I'm straight (because that's what the society set as the Default Sexuality) but then I realised that I didn't care about Genders which made me think that I'm Pan. But Later, when I was searching about this spectrum, I came across Aromanticism and Asexuality and felt so dumb for trying to mentally jot down things I like and dislike about a person and forcing myself to like someone (Lol I feel so embarrassed haha). I'm so happy that you made this video!💚
ive watched this video many times before, but this is the first time i’m seriously thinking about my sexuality like this. ive thought i was bi for the longest time, but like jaiden, i also haven’t experienced any crushes or really understood romantic attraction. this videos helped me reflect more on myself, so thank you jaiden :)
So glad you felt comfortable enough to share this! Side note: I love the amount of detail you put into your animations. It’s truly inspiring and makes them so interesting to watch.
I like how Jaiden brought up how she doesn't really care who it is, she just offers them to play video games with her I relate to this because whenever someone comes to my house I love to offer for them to play a game of some sort with me. It helps to ease tension and it's an all around fun time
@HBegaming YT "Jaiden Animations Impersonation Reupload"... That's the video where she gloated about sending cops to a child's house. The video also made the kid get doxxed and death threats... "Senator"... God these Jaiden fans are 11.
Your sexuality, who you love, and the kind of people you are drawn to are deeply personal and beautiful aspects of who you are. They are expressions of your heart, your soul, and your unique experience of the world. You don’t need to explain, defend, or hide them. Love is a gift, in all its forms, and it deserves to be celebrated, not judged. The way you love adds something special to the world-something no one else can replicate. And remember, there’s nothing wrong with being exactly who you are. You’re enough, just as you are. Other people's opinions about your sexuality are their own, not your burden to carry. Let your light shine freely, and surround yourself with those who see and celebrate your worth. The world is brighter when we honor and embrace the love in our hearts-yours included.
As someone who is ace, having videos of people I look up to expressing their feelings or being aro/ace would have saved me years of inner conflict, confusion, and dismissing myself. Even now knowing that there are other people who grew up with the same antics that I did makes me feel validated. I just know that this video has helped at least one person who wandered the things things out there and that’s amazing. Thank you Jaiden! You’re amazing :)
The “tunnel vision” feeling you described sounds a lot like platonic attraction, aka “the reason it took me 20 years to realize I was aroace,” because I was like “ah, yes. This must be that ‘crush’ thing everyone talks about.”
Same, just in a slightly different way. My mom asked me who my school crush was, after humming and hahing for a bit, I just said who I thought was the prettiest. I had zero inclination of ever dating that person. TBH I still don’t really understand crushes, like are they just the person you find the most attractive or is there something more?
"WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE?!" You're fantastic. I really relate to all of this -- like, in a way that has me thinking "Okay maybe I do need to reevaluate some things I thought I knew about myself" -- and I really appreciate that you made the video even though it opens the door to a lot of people speculating and making assumptions about your personal life.
I've always been afraid I might be aromantic. I want a connection that goes deeper than just being mates that hang together every once in a while. But after this video maybe I'm not so afraid to start exploring if I'm maybe aromantic
I’m aro-ace and get that (I’m a hopeless romantic when it comes to fiction, rom-coms are my jam). It might be worth asking them if they’d be interested in that. Even if it’s just little things like texting each other more, venting more personal stuff, being more vulnerable. I asked a friend once if they were comfortable with me saying “love you” as a goodbye, like I do with family, and it turned out really well for me.
@@olifromsolly6007 imagine being so mad someone does not want children (never even said that) that you make a hate comment. Wait until blind finds out tons of people don’t want kids 💀
@@Sentient-potatoit's perfectly normal to not want to have kids. Some people just aren't meant for that kind of thing. Besides it's not like being a genertic dead end is much of a problem since there are 8 billion people, it's not like humanity will die out?
I had never heard of being “aromantic” before. This makes me wonder if I’m aromantic. Like, I think I crave wanting to be loved, but just haven’t had that feeling of love. I’ve tried having that feeling. I thought I had it once, but then looking back on it, I didn’t really feel anything. I was just trying to convince myself I felt something, when in reality I just really liked hanging with the person. I think most of the “crushes” I had growing up in High School were just physical attraction, so I know for a fact I’m not asexual because I do experience physical attraction. This is confusing. I gotta look more into this to figure out if I actually am aromantic, or if I’m just bad at identifying my own emotions, lol.
That is perfectly valid! I forget the exact term, but there is a term for people who desire romantic love but do not feel it. You could also just say it’s basically just aromantic but with a certain attitude about it because of societal pressure. Either way hope it goes well, it’s healthy to experiment with your identity and you deserved to be happy and confident no matter what
Separating intimacy and romantic attraction clears things up for me. Also, showing how asexuality can be a spectrum. I've having second thoughts about what I could be. Whatever I decide is staying with me (and partners)
@Logan Roof hey as someone who has and still is struggling with anorexia please don't say these things it can be very hurtful especially since with the way our minds work if we don't do one thing that someone else that has anorexia does we are told by ourselves that it isn't bad because we don't do that one thing. Again, please don't say things like this because it isn't good for our mental health at all and could end up making someone fall deeper into anorexia
The way Jaiden describes robotically picking a “crush” in order to fit in in was exactly my own experience and how I realized I was aroace now as an adult. Thank u for sharing this with us Jaiden ❤️
NO BUT THATS ALSO ME I WAS LIKE “Which one of you fucks could be possibility the best choice for me” and then none of them were for my whole childhood until I realized I was Aro-Ace LMAO
I also had a similar childhood experience, although a little different. A friend told me he had a crush on me and we started “dating” because I liked him as a friend and thought this was something I had to do. It wasn’t something I really wanted but with everyone having relationships at the time, I thought I needed someone. I eventually broke it off, thinking I was lesbian. Now I know I’m aroace
I like how you didn't overshare. Like, the entire statement is that we're all strangers that refused to listen to the stranger danger rule really hit me. People use the internet like a diary sometimes, so it's pretty refreshing to have a surface level talk, but not a deep sea dive into the life of someone I really honestly don't know. Jaiden is cool and awesome!
Genuinely, as someone who realized I was aroace pretty recently, this means so much to me. It’s nice to see other people experiences pretty much the same things as me. I really appreciate this video! (The searching for a crush thing hits so close to home for me)
I've always thought being able to say you're "Ace" sounded so cool, and thinking on it, adding "Aro" to it makes it sound like you're saying "Arrow Ace" which straight up sounds like a superhero name.
I absolutely cackled when Jaiden began talking about how being AroAce is the coolest orientation. My little sister is Aromantic and she has the exact same energy and makes fun of me for being having mushy bisexual feelings. It's hilarious and I kind of love it.
@@Ivngkt Sorry to reply to your trolling again, but I don't understand this joke you keep making. You've made it before, you've established that you KNOW nobody else is referring to an aroma, but you keep mentioning it.
This honestly made me so happy to see someone, especially a person who's so big on the internet, speaking about being aroace. For so long, I thought I was SUPPOSED to feel romantic attraction, but this video has really helped me feel better. This video made me realize that I myself may be aroace and it feels so much better knowing that there are more aroace people out there, thank you. :]
The vid actually has me questioning if I'm somewhere under the umbrella. I wouldn't have thought so, but it may be worth more research. I can definitely identify with over-rationalizing everything and not being on the same emotional wavelength as most everyone else.
@@jimnelson9949 It's totally worth looking into more, there's a lot of more specific terms that fall under the Aro and Ace umbrella's, so it's entirely possible you could find a term that feels right for you
its so interesting hearing this side when im the complete opposite, pansexual, hypersexual, hyperromantic, every thing i do is basically based off the love i feel towards someone (which can be overwhelming to most and leads to me being alone anyways).
I'm Pansexual and its pretty interesting hearing the opposite and yeah I feel you most things I do is based on how much love I feel towards them and it gets overwhelming and I hate it because its not that I don't like someone or don't want to do something for a someone reason I just don't feel like doing something for what reason I feel like it's so unfair I treat someone better then the other because I don't love or love them and I feel like I'm going to lose a friendship or a relationship. And not sure if anyone believes in astrology or just zodiacs but I'm a Libra and when I lose a relationship I have a hard time going on from the break up and I just keep the emotions of anything I feel to myself and can't get to tell anyone about them it hurts when being overwhelmed added with whatever else bad I'm feeling
Damn this was TWO years ago??? Where did the times go bro, I swear this was just months ago for me lol btw congrats on your new cat, Toaster! She’s very cute lol
Those "tunnel vision" moments hit close to home. I don't think I've ever related this close to a video until now. Thank you for being comfortable enough to talk about these experiences Jaiden 😊
i feel that "choosing a person to have a crush on" thing so hard. when i discovered the aroace spectrum it was just so freeing. and also kind of isolating because almost everyone else around you doesn't feel what you feel. or... i guess i don't feel what they feel. anyway this video is a BIG MOOD and i always feel nice inside when i find out a content creator i follow shares this spectrum with me. it's just nice to know there's people out there like me, yknow?
Realising I'm demisexual was huge for me. I also did the choosing thing as a kid, it just felt wrong to not have a crush on someone even if I really didn't
I honestly didn't know of anyone else who did this! I looked back at younger me doing that, and at the time thinking they were real crushes, and thinking "wow, that is really weird, and you were really confused on what a crush actually was." I'm not aro/ace, I just am not into the opposite sex, but it was so amazing to hear someone else doing that! I found the video suprising relatable, and know it must be so awesome for people who actually are aro/ace. I love the rep this gives them, and the support and love.
The whole "thinking you should have a crush because everyone has a crush" hit me so hard. As a demiromantic, I had a similar experience: my friends would crush on a boy they barely talked to or some shit and I was sitting there like "how do you decide that? did you just look at him and somehow figure out that he's the one". I was expecting, like, some little light to light up when I looked at someone, then while talking about the few crushes I've had in life, my BFF pointed out how they were all friends I was close to, and I went _oh._
God SAME. I can count the amount of crushes I've had on one hand and they've all been people over been close friends with, so my friend then saying "hey demisexuality and demiromanticism is a thing" I was like WHAT. It literally opened my eyes and explained so much and made me feel seen.
@@kaboom801 “A demiromantic person is someone who only develops romantic feelings for another person when they have a strong emotional connection to them. Demiromantic people can be of any gender identity or sexual orientation”
@@kaboom801 Demiromantics are people who only feel romantic attraction to those they've already become strongly emotionally connected with. Think the Friend to Lovers trope. Demisexual is the same 'need to be emotionally connected first' but for the physical side of attraction (aka thinking that the person is hot) rather than the romantic side. Does that help? =D
apologies if the audio sounds different, my mic exploded during recording
It’s fine!
Oh lol it’s okay lol
It's ok We love you
O
its perfectly fine 🙂
*”In the nicest way possible, its none of your business”* is literally the most understandable thing I’ve ever heard
READ MY NAME!!!!!
!!!!!!!!
Ok ash
For reall XD
Whaaaa no, how dare she not provide details on her intimate life, I'm a long time sub which means we are basically friends! What's a toxic parasocial relation?
@@SpiritOfHugs thats what im sayin, these chronically online kids istg 💀💀💀😭😭
When I was younger I thought a crush was someone you hated because you wanted to crush them 💀
💀
Oh god 💀
That is one of the most aroace thing I have ever heard
💀
tsundere /j
"WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE"
Literally the best line in the whole video.
“We’re all strangers not listening to ‘stranger danger’”
and
“We’re all pretending to be adults”
have their moments, but yea
also relatable for fellow aroace folks
well for me it was different
i was a lil gae boi (gae moment lol)
and then i always wanted to be interested in the older guys (like 16+ older)
and then middle school hit...
and uhh...
im still obsessing with the same exact guy :-)
even though there probably 18 by now...
welp rip for me ig lol
exactly 😂
I heard that once
Ok twice
Three times
+
Im lonely
I like how a lot of ace/aro people (including myself at one point) are like “What’s wrong with me? Why am I not interested in anyone?” And Jaiden’s entire attitude is “What’s wrong with all of you? Why are you all so ugly?”
I share Jaidens sentiment. Unfortunately there aren't any good songs about them so we're just stuck with 2 upbeat songs, the rest are just depressing
To be honest I feel both options!
My friends refuse to believe me that I am aroace. Like I was so overwhelmed by this "I need a crush, think" I forced myself to like my favourite fictional character and told he is my crush....
One time I needed to explain that what a crush is... And lemme say... It didn't go well...
"We're all pretending to be adults here!"
jaiden has perfectly summed up the internet experience
And the life experience
You like beef bro
@@Radioactive-Braincell88 yeah it's alright, minced beef good in Bolognese
and the comment section experience on this video
7 year olds setting their age to 100 setting up their account on anything
I’m not aromantic but i agree with the not-getting-why-being-just-friends-is-a-bad-thing point. Friendship rocks. No kisses i suppose, but still great
Edit: this was not meant to cover every situation or be seen by many people at all, agh! I totally understand it being extremely painful when someone you have deep romantic feelings for doesn’t share them! I do think sometimes friendships, particularly male-female friendships, aren’t appreciated enough on their own unless they have the possibility of leading to a relationship. I was more trying to refer to that concept, though I realize I didn’t make that clear. I was sort of imagining a low-stakes situation of an acquaintance shooting their shot with another acquaintance (which could also be scary or embarrassing depending on the individual situation of course, but I figure it could also turn into a friendship if the awkwardness was surmountable). If you were rejected by someone you had romantic feelings for, I promise I’m not trying to dismiss that hurt, this comment was not meant to be universally applicable! And ending a friendship because it’s painful or awkward for this reason is absolutely not inherently a bad choice.
Edit part 2: rewatching the video, I think I also should have phrased the sentence as understanding a feeling rather than agreeing with a point.
well as she said its an emotional thing, if you really like someone an they reject you it can feel crushing it makes it hard to be around them
What are you kidding me kisses suck hugs all the way
virgin gang lit af
Especially if those hugs last longer than 20 seconds and feel actually genuine instead of weak!
Having a mismatch in the level of care you have for someone hurts, it isn't insurmountable but it is an understanding reason for someone to be unable to maintain a friendship after they have been rejected. (this works for crushes, marriage proposals, friendships, acquaintances and probably many more examples of relationships between people)
This video was how I first learned about asexuality and it CHANGED MY LIFE! I’m so grateful to you Jaiden, I came out to my mom yesterday and I’ve never been so confident in my skin!
Congrats, and same! This video is the thing that opened my eyes and got me to look into asexuality. Now I've fully accepted that I'm aroace and have come out to everyone close to me, and my life has never made more sense.
same with me! and yeah, this video helped me learn I was a heteroromantic asexual :)
Me to
It's good to be a Muslim and realize how much filth you Americans tolerate.
@He_is_coming... I'm non-bianry but I'm also aromantic :)
“WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE”
Literally the best one liner in the video
It's a question I ask many a minute
Lol
4:01
dang ppl are still commenting on this this was 7 months ago-
lol
Man, highschool and even college were such a weird time to me. Your "fake developing crushes on people" is resonating with me so much right now.
One of us?
@@lunalee3021 thinking the romance in certain movies and shows is dumb, and having a very, incredibly big hard time even understanding what romance of romantic love feels like is very different. I too think certain romances in shows are dumb and unnecessary, but I'm not aromantic, if anything I'm a hopeless romantic with my partner, if you're heterosexual, do you feel attraction to your same sex? No? Well imagine there is no person in the world with opposite sex, that's how it feels like to aromantics in a romantic way and to asexuals in a sexual way
Relatable
@@lunalee3021 I don't think you understand what an identity is, y'know the thing that makes you, you? Being Asexual or Aromantic is part of an identity because it's who you are. The fact you didn't even consider it's existence is exactly why Jaiden' video was so important to the community; it sheds a light on us and tells people: "yeah, we exist, deal with it."
@@lunalee3021 did you even watch the video
"I hope you can understand even just a little of what I talked about, and if not, I just hope you can be nice." Standing ovation for that line, honestly. So many people who don't understand something use that as a reason to dismiss or invalidate it, but not fully being able to comprehend something doesn't make it impossible to have compassion for those who do experience it. (As someone who is constantly confused by other people, I have firsthand experience in this.)
Also, major kudos for the approach of this video. Using your platform to speak up for those who don't often feel seen is a really admirable thing to do, and maintaining boundaries of your own personal life at the same time is very respectable.
you're soy
By evidence with how other react negatively about this for odd reasons,it's really suck tbh
4:02 “WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE?” got me😭😭😭
Ooh look at this baby comment 1 day old comment dhdhhdjufjfoqpkxc qdjxnxjzkzjx
That “wait, they’re *not* joking??” moment is so accurate. This entire video describes what I was trying to figure out up until like a year ago. And the happiness of figuring it out, you’re not broken, this is a thing. It so upsetting in a good way? Relieving almost.
She did a great job on the video and you're valid.
everyone is valid mate
Fr I was so emotional watching this, means a lot just to feel seen
Demi was like this except when I found someone I liked and was suddenly like "oh that is feelings that happen' hm".
I just watched that part 😨
“No one presented to me OTHER options.” Wow, WOW this hit hard. It took me a long time to finally realize I was Ace, it was a revelation that being Ace was a legitimate THING and not just me being indecisive/selfish/weird.
Not Jaiden’s video being the catalyst to me realizing I’m aromantic 😭
You got brainwashed.
@NewJerseyMilitia1488 you got brainwashed
@@NewJerseyMilitia1488 Bruh it's a organic chem joke
Same bro
real 😂
Edit 2: Ok please stop giving advice in general actually, I guarantee I’ve already heard it.
Edit: This comment is 2 years old. I appreciate all the advice, but I already know about Cupioromanticism. Please stop telling me.
Ok, speaking as someone who is in High School and desperate for affection… Jaiden’s story about thinking “man I don’t have a crush on anyone, I guess I keep getting unlucky” really hit close to home… but I don’t think I’m aromantic? Because despite not feeling any romantic attraction I still deeply crave a romantic relationship, because theoretically, it sounds really nice and like something I would enjoy. And at this point I’m not sure if I’m just bad at identifying my own emotions, keep getting “unlucky”, or am somewhere on the aromantic/demiromantic spectrum.
THISSS ^^^^^^^^^
same but tbh you prolly just at an ugly school like me 😭
A lot of effort into this single comment
@SoundFoodist omg??
I'm 13 luckily I don't have to worry about that :)
I have been saying "I am sure I will feel love and affection if the right person comes along" for like the last 10 years. This kinda makes a lot more sense now.
If you mean you're in love with jaiden it's just pixels but if it's otherwise then it's fine
@@Edward_Dusk bruh what 💀
LITERALLY SAME! I've been sad and feeling left behind too, its nice to realise im not alone (:
@Logan Floor {UTTP} They were just saying their experience
@@Bella_bumble true that, ever since learning I am an ace, I have felt alone, and feel like nobody would understand me. It doesn't change me as a person, just makes me feel, that this is something my close people should know about, but have never had the confidence to say anything
“At the end of the day, we are all just strangers ignoring the stranger danger rule.”
Its true lol
@@Jeejune_Jx America is homophobic-af. I'm gonna be direct as can be and ask:
Please help with that by watching and supporting Telltale Atheist, Forrest Valkai and of course also this video here.
S tier quote
@@nenmaster5218 the fuck does this have to do with anything?
Lol true
jaiden you literally changed my mind and understanding towards people for the better, thank you. I love your animations keep it up.
Legit one of the best comments I've ever seen
If someone ever passes you a note that says "do you like me yes or no" just just tell them I'm not registered to vote
I saw that meme and it made me laugh like a lunatic
I get it
Dude yes
I would just do
A: Tell them they made a mistake
Or
B: Just rip it up
Or eat the paper 😏
My last girl friend learned that she was aroace, and didnt have any romantic attraction to me at all. She just saw us as really good friends, similar to that college person. We worked through it, and are now BFFs. I'm so proud of her ❤
Thank you for being so supportive of your friend!
This is so cute!
Yooo good for you and your friend
I love stories like this, because it’s how I made one of my best friends. Hope you guys are doing great!
The world needs more people like you 🤍💜
"WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE" would be an awesome senior quote
I’m stealing it.
I think I'll try setting that as my senior quote
@@carlbrutanawanadelwski7026 Ok sure bud, none of us believe your crap. Go get a job freak, instead of framing a youtuber because of your jealousy.
@@TheDerplox no lmao
That's the one I'm going to be using in two years
"Whats you sexuality?"
"Gamer"
Rewatching this after the ADHD video. She perfectly describes hyper-fixating on a person and misinterpreting it as a crush lol.
no fucking way, I just found this channel through the ADHD video (on account of having ADD myself) today and then saw this video right afterward lol
Neurodivergent LGBTQIA people, arise.
@NJMilitia so true, it's just an illusion
@NJMitilia it is a real thing because I have it
OMG YES FR
Dude the “picking a crush out to feel like I’ve reached my emotional quota” is such a mood. I’m autistic and have always struggled feeling left out because I’ve never felt romantic attraction.
right? same with dating people because i wanted to like upgrade them from friend to like best friend / dedicated friend
Literally SAME! It took me years to realize that my “crushes” on boys at school was really just the gender envy I had of masculine people… turns out I fall under the non-binary umbrella and just wanted to be more masculine. I don’t know if my neurodivergency has anything to do with inability to feel intense romantic attraction towards someone, but the thought of marrying someone and living with them forever just sounds… unpleasant.
feels bad man
Dude, same here! Does Asperger Syndrome ring a bell?
yeah this def feels like the autism experience right here
As a straight man, I found this video not only informative but helpful to my personal understanding of relationships and whether it is that I want to be in one or I feel pressured to be in one. This is an amazing follow-up to a previous video of yours and I'm glad you were able to talk about things in ways that people don't necessarily do.
damn respect bro
i agree
I agree, especially the part of “you can be happy on your own”, it’s something so basic but it stills hits really hard hearing it or trying make that sink in
As someone who figured out she was demiromantic a few years ago, the scanning your classmates to see if anyone has finally caught your eye hit soooo close to home. As does the picking someone random to have a crush on just to hit that milestone mark.
!!!NIAGA THGIARTS SNOITAMINANEDIAJ NRUT LLIW SOEDIV YM
,.,,,,
Demon lol
@@JaydenSupport probably the only time i respect jayden for
"So I made up a crush" is one of the most relatable things I've ever heard. I distinctly remember being in middle school and everyone talking about crushes and when I was asked about mine I just mentioned a close friend, and I did the same thing like a year later with someone else, and then the same when I got into high school, and I kept feeling like I wasn't doing something right.
I eventually discovered I was aromantic and asexual but everyone around me was so weird about it. A teacher even told me "how are you going to teach your kids about sex if you've never had it?" Which- no comments honestly.
I'm much happier now knowing exactly where I want my relationships to be and not stressing over which I'm expected to have. Great video Jaiden :) thanks a lot!
READ MY NAME!!!!!!!!
A teacher said that? Who says that to a student wtf-
Wait what? How are you gonna have kids to talk to in the first place? Not only was that inappropriate but it doesn't even make sense.
That teacher really didn't think that through huh
That teacher…… is a real weirdo
my best (female) friend is aromatic and asexual and i'm asexual (man). a lot of people asking if we're together/ a couple because we get along very well. some find it weird that we don't want to be a couple, like why don't you try it? you might like it. things like this, i find annoying because i find that these days everything needs to sexualized and romantised
Man, exactly!!!
Are they completely unaware of the concept of friendship or platonic relationships?
@@Awesomeflame16probably
Also I will say very similar experience lok
@@Awesomeflame16 with some, maybe. i noticed that it's always with a man - woman relation, never with 2 men or women. so far i know nobody said too 2 men/ women that they should be together because they get along very well.
Some asexuals: "I don't feel anything, something is wrong with me"
Chad Jaiden: "I don't feel anything... You all are ugly"
Honestly I resonate with Jaiden with the ugly part. Don't take it personally tho.
I agree
No Sigma Jaiden
I call people gross when they ask if I have a crush
Fr as an ace I can confirm 😅
Honestly, I can’t understand all of the hate Jaiden got for this video. She is by far one of the sweetest and least problematic you tuber out there.
Queerphobia
It’s the age old human nature of hating to hate.
Perhaps this is due to the fact that some people grew up in homophobic conditions and that LGBT people should not be encouraged (By the way, so am I)
Perhaps this is due to the fact that some people grew up in homophobic conditions and that LGBT people should not be encouraged (by the way, I also)
Perhaps this is due to the fact that some people grew up in homophobic conditions and that LGBT people should not be encouraged (by the way, I also)
I love the combo of the terms. like, areoace flows so well. Me and my husband refer to ourselves as pandemics(pansexual and demisexual).
I audibly laughed at "pandemics"; that's relationship goals right there 😂
Pandemics sounds like Pandemia help (btw i love it)
I believe it’s spelled aroace, as it has nothing to do with air
Nah not covid starting like this
PANDEMIIIIIICCCCCCSSSSSSSSSSSSS
The whole “wait you guys weren’t joking???” Is the ace EXPERIENCE JDHDHD i remember the day i learned what asexual meant and instantly i felt so understood!
jdhdhdjdjfdhdjdhjddjd
I'm demi and listen to a lot of country music, about half of all country music is "there was this very attractive girl who I talked to once, and I am now sad she's going away, because I love her" and I was always like "but... why?
Jaiden thinking she's bi or pan because she was equally disinterested in everyone is the funniest thing to me.
Seems to be a common aro-ace experience, I had the same thing happen to me. Thought I was pan for at least a year. 😂
yeah i started thinking i was bi for the same reason and then lockdown hit and i started using my brain lmao
no I feel it so bad though
I thought I was bi and greyro UNTIL NOW am I just aro wtf I am having a crisis
i've read somewhere (so cmiiw) that long ago bi people included ace in the label because of the same thing, being 'equally unintrested'
That's how me discovering my aromanticism worked 🤣
Hi Jaiden! I had never understood your video because I'm Brazilian and I don't know much English, but after they posted a dubbed version I was able to understand the idea of your video and I was even able to identify with it! My whole life I thought I couldn't really understand the feeling of "falling in love", I thought I was being ridiculous or that people were just exaggerating when they talked about it, but now with this video I realized that I am actually aroace! Thank you very much for this video Jaiden❤
"We're all strangers not listening to the stranger danger rule"
Yeah that's the Jaiden we know, classic sense of humor too, good start!
@SoundFoodist wtf dude that's horrible
@@youcantakemehottogothese people spit offensive garbage for attention, Jacks dad got mocked, Markiplier’s niece got mocked, these trolls are just animals to be ignored as they scream for attention. Don’t let them drag you down. Jaiden Mark and Jack ignore them and so should we.
@SoundFoodist What is wrong with you? What if you were in her shoes?? You wouldn't like being told this!
@UCf8J8NnXkq7L54lUSeyjtPA again, what the hell dude
What the fuck happened there?
James: Has a girlfriend
Jaiden: Is aroace
Fanfiction artists: Let's go ahead and ignore that
oh no you had to remind me (vietnam war flashbacks)
@@indescribablycoolikeafurniture i have the cold war flashbacks (soviet union fall)
@@novianimates ah yes, the fall of our beautiful motherland...
Oh dear....
That's because majority.
More is power
I know Jaiden referred this as the cliff notes version but honestly I learnt so much from this. This video is definitely going to help a lot of people out there :)
I have 24 kids in my basement
@@rohitbhattarai2243 Wha-
@@rohitbhattarai2243 ;-;
@@rohitbhattarai2243 help me some guy kidnapped me and 23 others
@@rohitbhattarai2243 OMG SAME!!!!
this comment section makes me want to rip my hair out lmao
same
that's literally so real
"why is no one attractive" is hella relatable. I'm learning more about myself as well because of this video.
Ooop
@SoundFoodist nice bait bro no one cares
I’m ace but I still experience aesthetic attraction. So people look nice, but there’s no emotion.
I have the opposite problem, "why is everybody attractive"
@:D same
"That's not gay what the hell is that"
That line was too funny
Owlhouse amphibia yes amazing marcy best character
@Jack Wrath uhm no
Ayyy my gang
Amphibia 4 life
It was pretty funny
Figuring out youre aro or ace or both is so hard bc society really teaches you that you need to be in a romantic relationship and be intimate or you'll be sad and die alone.
@Logan dude ur WEAK lmao
@Logan You don't even have a gf. So shut it.
That's because it's true. Just take the L and stop making it into a label
@@NobleTitty you're so outdated that even boomers won't say crap like this lol
Literally
ok but as someone who is lesbian can we just talk about those people who think if you say you are not straight then your automatically gay..like there’s more than just gay..there are so many different and unique sexualities too
also great vid Jaiden!!
True, i guess due to the amount of people that talk about others / they are gay, the people only focus and know about only that one thing
I am not sure, one thing that i know is that you are right, and that most people are stupid
Not many people know that.. it’s immature to assume everyone’s supposed to know everything. Many people grew up in households where topics like this aren’t even talked about. Most people don’t even know what LGBTQ+ means.. it’s our jobs to start educating people about these topics.
@ I know I’m just saying, Also cuz I told this one guy i was gay because I didn’t think he knew what lesbian meant and he did and called me stupid so um..🥲🥲
Oh my goodness "zero is equal to zero" is EXACTLY the reason I thought I was bi/pan for the longest time in highschool. I am also aro/ace and just thought everyone was doing the checklist thing too! Thank you so much for a well thought out video that is entirely relatable. I got a little teary eyed at the end!
I read somewhere that aromantics and asexuals were once accepted into the bisexual community before they had their own terms and definitions for that very reason!! The bis were like, "yup 0=0 so I guess you're one of us!" And thus began the vehement bi/ace/aro solidarity that persists today 🤝
Fun fact, back before asexual wasn't it's own sexuality because no one knew that that could happen, bisexuals actually welcomed asexuals into their community as their own because of this understanding.
Update: I sent this to my cousin, who has been trying to be supportive with me being aro/ace (the most supportive out of my family) and she immensely appreciated this video, as it explained things perfectly for her! Thank you again Jaiden for making this video.
This was literally my aroace awakening. This was the first time I heard of these terms and I was like, “OH. OHHHHH. That’s why everyone is unattractive.”
Same
Why, sad that have to poke fun at others instead of looking at your sad, miserable life?@noname-lf8yr
@noname-lf8yr You're cringe. Next question.
@noname-lf8yryour life must be pretty sad if you don’t have anything better to do other than hating on others because of their sexuality
no, it wasn't. you're 12-16 years old and you spend too much time on the internet
I’ve never heard someone articulate, how I’ve felt about being on the Ace spectrum before. The absolute - not lack of awareness, but the trouble processing that people actually feel an emotion you have never experienced. It’s really nice to hear it vocalized. Because while i’ve said it before to my friends, when someone isn’t Ace or Aro, it’s hard to understand you just exist without something society deems so important - It can be kind of isolating, existing in a world where you’re one of the odd people out? You’re the minority. It’s really amazing to see you make a video about this! And like epic pog for discovering what makes you feel comfortable with yourself! Watching this video made me just really warm and happy!! Thank you Jaiden! Congrats on finding yourself
It can be so hard to explain! The amount of times I've been told "You just haven't met the right person yet" has been so frustrating. The worst part being how that lack of understanding can make you second-guess yourself.
@@itsjustme6334 like telling a color blind person they're just not looking hard enough 🤣🤣
This might sound a little bit weird, but this video has become somewhat of a comfort point, because it is the only place in all of my life where I feel like someone understands me. My parents are normally really supportive, but when it comes to my being aro, they can't really understand what I mean so they're always telling me "Ah, you'll get married eventually!"
I'm kinda hoping that if I click on this video more often RUclips might find some aroace content for me
God I know this animation is two years old; but having just tried to come out as ace, this is still so comforting to rewatch. It’s nice to know I’m not alone
I am I fellow bisexual. Hello!
Congrats!! Realizing you're ace can be so freeing. I wish you happiness, fellow ace! ^_^
You're not alone!
I'm considering being straight/aromantic, and it's nice to see everyone else in this comment section.
Welcome to the ace club! Always feels good to know we're not alone
You see, I'm not aroace, but holy shit do I relate to "Society expects you to be in a relationship."
Tell 'em, always annoyed with people badgering me about it.
Especially now when my friends try to ship me with people when it's not their business in the first place
At 25 my psychiatrist asked why I never was in a relationship and I countered with "How is that connected to my suicid attempt" His response was going on a long rant about the word of god and me looking up other psychiatrists mid session
It's especially annoying when you do tell someone multiple times that you don't want children or a bf/significant other and they laugh at you and tell you that you'll find someone one day. I want to focus on myself and the thought of being in a romantic relationship or having children grosses me out I want nothing to do with either of those things
It's almost as if we've created stereotypes for relationships and those stereotypes, according to society, MUST be fulfilled!! Otherwise we are absolute nobodies who will go nowhere. And if we go nowhere, we should not be happy. Or something along those lines.
Glad that picking fake crushes in order to fit in is a universal ace experience
@Random_gaming_FnAf lmao one kid once called me the f slur for being openly bi and obviously probably more queer than that surface fact so I slapped her and she never insulted me again lol
pleeeeease say aro and not ace when talking about relationships. i’m aro and not ace and asexual meaning aromantic is the biggest misconception that keeps anyone from ever realizing that aro people exist.
To me it feels more like a female aroace thing cause I'm aroace but I never thought I needed a crush
I pretended that I had a crush when I was younger because I thought that I was supposed to when I was literally in second grade.
@@Mr_Noob-jp8nvmaybe it might be slightly more female, but I'm male and before I knew I was Aroace I assumed I needed a crush.
"Why are none of you attractive?" I can relate
I feel like this is a great way to show or make someone understand you don’t need “intimate” time to “love” somebody.
Ummm....?
Literally...NOBODY...CARES about that stuff! Nobody thinks about what it means to love or if you need to be intimate to love. That crap is so trivial I'm honestly surprised someone like you managed to make it sound like an issue!
"It's none of your business"
It's shocking how quickly people forget that. They carry on like your (lack of) orientation actually affects them personally. I sincerely hope none of your detractors have scared you away from continuing to make amazing content.
thats nice
@Bad Editor To help other people who are feeling a similar thing using a large platform can help people to understand themselves if the creator is feeling something similar
@Bad Editor because the content creator chooses to share that info. Anything beyond what the creator chooses to share is nobody's business, that's the point.
In Jaiden's case, she's helping to raise awareness about aro/ace, which a lot of people didn't know about (myself included). Jaiden gave a boost to the popularity of Nuzlockes and Mario Kaizo, so this video is sure to raise awareness about being aro/ace.
@Bad Editor This is because Jaiden wants to share this part of her personality to help us better understand her, but she doesn’t want to share more personal information.
@@colanaxis I don't think it's so much about helping us understand her, more likely it's helping us understand what it means to be aro/ace.
it makes me so immensely happy that creators are talking about the subject of aromanticism, as it is almost never represented in media/irl. ty for talking about this and bringing light to it, as ive experienced it myself
Stream Young Loud
Bojack Horseman to this day is the only show to represent an aromantic ace character as far as I’m aware
@@Kelpflakes i believe aromanticism is mentioned however todd is not aro, but it has amazing ace rep :))
Dude, you just opened my eyes. My only "crushes" have been people who wanted to be nice to me, for a certain reason.
Everyone else: I'm not in a relationship because I'm not attractive
Jaiden: I'm not in a relationship because everyone else isn't attractive
can relate, i dont think ive found a single person attractive really, i would just look a few times because i liked that some people looked a bit similar to me and move on with my day like nothing happened
True
also jaiden: *walks into a room screaming* WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE
Cringe af!
...why does the make sense lol
"We're all pretending to be adults here," is one of the best things I've heard in a while.
That aside, it is lovely to see a video covering these topics. (:
Right?? We're all just Children at heart whether we live to be 90 or not. The difference is that, some folks that they're Children and LIVE life full of Vitality 'n all WHILE most pretend to be adults and get all bitter/grumpy due to responsibilities and "old age."
It's anyone's pick honestly 🤣🤣
*some folks have accepted that they are CHILDREN and...
I am a child
I agree, but on a sidenote, why do you do (: for a smiley face instead of :)??? Random thought lol
“Teens are just big children, and adults are even bigger children.”
i dont identify as aroace, but as an autistic person, the feeling of "well everyone else is feeling this way now so i should probably start doing it too" without understanding thats not how feelings work is very real
As a fellow autistic one, I can relate to that.
I try to but I often struggle with "experiencing feelings". It took me a long time to realize I had feelings for my girlfriend even though I've known her since childhood now because I was never in a relationship before and allways thought I have to instantly fall in love when I see the right one or something.
I still have a lot to learn about relationships but I know that my best friend will be there for me, helping me learning about how to love, in a way.
As someone also on the Autism Spectrum, I also can relate to finding feelings for someone even though I’m not Aroace.
I remember having “crushes” while not understanding that you actually FEEL something
I’m also autistic 😊
I... Miiiiight be Autistic? I've never been diagnosed but the symptoms exist
aaaand.... I used to feel the same way, trying to fit in without even knowing how to emotions
I eventually gave up and decided to just give up and just... act like I want to despite everyone else's ideas and time
I still wonder what the word "Crush" even means lol
Honestly idc, you make such good content and positive authentic energy. It’s your soul that matters (pls don’t make me a grim reaper), the good inside you.
Ok I do care, just does not affect the image of you.
👌
Grim reaper...what?
“We’re all just strangers refusing to listen to the stranger danger rule”
THAT IS THE REALEST THING I HAVE HEARD IN A WEEK!!!
I remembered talking about aromantic with a friend and he legit said “How does smelling nice make you LGBTQ?” because he had mistaken aromatic = aromantic 🤦🏻♀️
Made my day. Will make that joke for now on
it is scientifically correct that all aromantics smell nice
LMAO
Why are people like this
I find it hard to believe the creator of the world couldn't have noticed that.
AYYY ME TOO, My family always tells me "that might change" and "I might have kids" and recently got out of a toxic relationship it's just nice hearing someone else say it's okay
I'm sorry about that, anything that happens will happen and if anyone is pressuring you to feel like you should have feelings for someone that can suck but they are not you and cannot understand you entirely
@F##CK МЕ СНЕCK MY РR0FILE be banished bot
Holy shit. This kinda put the puzzle pieces together. Thank you, from a new member of the Aroace community
As a mom who started watching you many years ago and now my 10 year old son does i appreciate this video. We both watched it separately and then had a conversation about it. Thank you jaiden 💓
I hope your having a wonderful day
I hope you're having a wonderful day
12:34 I don't know if this was intentional or not, but I love the idea of an aroace person expressing platonic affection and following it up with "no romo"
Dude. You just got me the new phrase ill say every day of my lofe, thank u
the new aroace trump card
Aramco ?
Yeah, no! That's a common thing! Very much a joke at the 'no homo' crowd, but yeah. Definitely a thing in the aro community, and I love it so much!
some people find it offensive to act like No Homo is just a funny thing to reference but yeah No Romo is very commonly said in the aro community as a joke about things
This video was 15 minutes of someone narrating and illustrating my entire life experience. The 'picking who to have a crush on', the 'this is a milestone I should be aiming for', the 'wait they're not joking?!'... all of it rang true. Thank you SO MUCH for making this video
For the longest time I thought I was gay because I never liked girls (and that's what society including my hom0phobic parents told me) But it just turns out I don't want to do anything to any person regardless of gender and sexuality lol.
Same 🥲
Exactly! I used to think that I'm straight (because that's what the society set as the Default Sexuality) but then I realised that I didn't care about Genders which made me think that I'm Pan. But Later, when I was searching about this spectrum, I came across Aromanticism and Asexuality and felt so dumb for trying to mentally jot down things I like and dislike about a person and forcing myself to like someone (Lol I feel so embarrassed haha). I'm so happy that you made this video!💚
ive watched this video many times before, but this is the first time i’m seriously thinking about my sexuality like this. ive thought i was bi for the longest time, but like jaiden, i also haven’t experienced any crushes or really understood romantic attraction. this videos helped me reflect more on myself, so thank you jaiden :)
So glad you felt comfortable enough to share this!
Side note: I love the amount of detail you put into your animations. It’s truly inspiring and makes them so interesting to watch.
“At the end of the day we are all strangers not listening to the stranger danger rule” -Jaiden
This is a fantastic quote and I need it on a t-shirt
I like how Jaiden brought up how she doesn't really care who it is, she just offers them to play video games with her
I relate to this because whenever someone comes to my house I love to offer for them to play a game of some sort with me. It helps to ease tension and it's an all around fun time
"Romantic attraction? Naw, they potential party member"
I feel the same
@HBegaming YT "Jaiden Animations Impersonation Reupload"... That's the video where she gloated about sending cops to a child's house. The video also made the kid get doxxed and death threats... "Senator"... God these Jaiden fans are 11.
@@cheesuscrustthegratelord788 Link?
Omg same
Your sexuality, who you love, and the kind of people you are drawn to are deeply personal and beautiful aspects of who you are. They are expressions of your heart, your soul, and your unique experience of the world. You don’t need to explain, defend, or hide them.
Love is a gift, in all its forms, and it deserves to be celebrated, not judged. The way you love adds something special to the world-something no one else can replicate. And remember, there’s nothing wrong with being exactly who you are. You’re enough, just as you are.
Other people's opinions about your sexuality are their own, not your burden to carry. Let your light shine freely, and surround yourself with those who see and celebrate your worth. The world is brighter when we honor and embrace the love in our hearts-yours included.
Extremely Based
As someone who is ace, having videos of people I look up to expressing their feelings or being aro/ace would have saved me years of inner conflict, confusion, and dismissing myself. Even now knowing that there are other people who grew up with the same antics that I did makes me feel validated. I just know that this video has helped at least one person who wandered the things things out there and that’s amazing. Thank you Jaiden! You’re amazing :)
Wdym *as someon is ace?*
@@pugg5ter542 it means Asexual. It’s just a nice way to shorten it.
@@liviwaslost ah ok
Whenever i see comments like these seeing the person admitting their ace makes me feel happy knowing i'm not the only one who feels this way
@@kyojurorengoku385 RUclipsr 'The Take' made Videos on Asexuality
The “tunnel vision” feeling you described sounds a lot like platonic attraction, aka “the reason it took me 20 years to realize I was aroace,” because I was like “ah, yes. This must be that ‘crush’ thing everyone talks about.”
Today I learned what Aromantic means and the last three decades are starting to make a lot more sense. Thank you for making this video.
It's never too late to get to know yourself
@@yasminechoerryscherry3701 I completely agree! I am so excited for my future now that I understand myself better.
@@fergerj I’m not exited
@@bill1357 exited?
I honeslty thought that aromantic was part of being asexual and this is the first time i have heard the term. Good to know.
Oh my God the "why are none of you attractive?!" being yelled in the room full of people killed me 😂😂😂😂😂
@Savetion (KING OF YT) I know you're a bot, but come on, you couldn't think of anything more clever than "gaymations"?
@Savetion (KING OF YT) I shouldn't be saying this, but you missed the *obvious* opportunity to say "Gayden Animations."
Hey look at that RUclipss report system worked.
Yeah same lol
I know this is supposed to be an at least semi-serious video, but that made me laugh out loud.
I relate so much to her talking about her childhood "crushes". This video is literally the perfect explanation of what it is to be aroace
though i ended up being mostly gay i can relate too because i used to have "crushes" on girls in the exact same way 😭
ikr right it basically feels like she told my own life story
Same, just in a slightly different way. My mom asked me who my school crush was, after humming and hahing for a bit, I just said who I thought was the prettiest. I had zero inclination of ever dating that person. TBH I still don’t really understand crushes, like are they just the person you find the most attractive or is there something more?
@@evilemuempire9550 i can feel your confusion sis/bro….. it’s such a strange concept for me
girl who had a crush on bowser is valid tho
"WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE?!" You're fantastic. I really relate to all of this -- like, in a way that has me thinking "Okay maybe I do need to reevaluate some things I thought I knew about myself" -- and I really appreciate that you made the video even though it opens the door to a lot of people speculating and making assumptions about your personal life.
Even as a gay man I related to that part. Just replace everyone with girls lol.
yg
Time stamp 4:03
I've always been afraid I might be aromantic. I want a connection that goes deeper than just being mates that hang together every once in a while. But after this video maybe I'm not so afraid to start exploring if I'm maybe aromantic
you may have to ask yourself, maybe you have always een queerplatonic with this friend? Feeling friendly but never sexual feelings
Dont feel like your possible aromaticsm is a curse. Just think of every moment you have not to think about dram,
inplace you can live as you want
I’m aro-ace and get that (I’m a hopeless romantic when it comes to fiction, rom-coms are my jam). It might be worth asking them if they’d be interested in that. Even if it’s just little things like texting each other more, venting more personal stuff, being more vulnerable. I asked a friend once if they were comfortable with me saying “love you” as a goodbye, like I do with family, and it turned out really well for me.
_"You don't have to be in a romantic relationship to be happy"_
Based Jaiden
there is nothing based about being a genetic dead end
@@olifromsolly6007 Imagine reducing people to their ability to produce offspring.
@@olifromsolly6007 imagine being so mad someone does not want children (never even said that) that you make a hate comment. Wait until blind finds out tons of people don’t want kids 💀
She did say she does not want kids in a different video tho
@@Sentient-potatoit's perfectly normal to not want to have kids. Some people just aren't meant for that kind of thing. Besides it's not like being a genertic dead end is much of a problem since there are 8 billion people, it's not like humanity will die out?
I had never heard of being “aromantic” before. This makes me wonder if I’m aromantic. Like, I think I crave wanting to be loved, but just haven’t had that feeling of love. I’ve tried having that feeling. I thought I had it once, but then looking back on it, I didn’t really feel anything. I was just trying to convince myself I felt something, when in reality I just really liked hanging with the person. I think most of the “crushes” I had growing up in High School were just physical attraction, so I know for a fact I’m not asexual because I do experience physical attraction. This is confusing. I gotta look more into this to figure out if I actually am aromantic, or if I’m just bad at identifying my own emotions, lol.
You can try looking into the many microlabels that exist under the aromantic umbrella!
If you can't find an identity just invent another one.
@@bewawolf19 stop trolling
That is perfectly valid! I forget the exact term, but there is a term for people who desire romantic love but do not feel it. You could also just say it’s basically just aromantic but with a certain attitude about it because of societal pressure. Either way hope it goes well, it’s healthy to experiment with your identity and you deserved to be happy and confident no matter what
@@jaefast5684 cupioromantic?
Separating intimacy and romantic attraction clears things up for me. Also, showing how asexuality can be a spectrum. I've having second thoughts about what I could be. Whatever I decide is staying with me (and partners)
They are two completely different things Aro is about romantic attraction Asexual is about Sexual attraction
@Logan Roof hey as someone who has and still is struggling with anorexia please don't say these things it can be very hurtful especially since with the way our minds work if we don't do one thing that someone else that has anorexia does we are told by ourselves that it isn't bad because we don't do that one thing. Again, please don't say things like this because it isn't good for our mental health at all and could end up making someone fall deeper into anorexia
So you're falling deeper into your anorexia because of a RUclips comment?
@@lophuranycthemera1755 no I'm saying it could happen to someone
I have never felt a video more relatable than this one
Thank you for making this video
Hearing other Aces say "...wait they're not joking?" about sex songs is the most validating phrase
Lmfao same!!!
Mood
Ikr haha
XD truu
Agreed m8
Mad respect for talking and getting awareness out there while still enforcing your boundaries, full support!
It takes courage to speak on this matter. Not too many people can do that especially in a world where everyone is isolated. Props to her
The way Jaiden describes robotically picking a “crush” in order to fit in in was exactly my own experience and how I realized I was aroace now as an adult. Thank u for sharing this with us Jaiden ❤️
NO BUT THATS ALSO ME I WAS LIKE “Which one of you fucks could be possibility the best choice for me” and then none of them were for my whole childhood until I realized I was Aro-Ace LMAO
@@ArtisticAngelLucas average furry clown
I also had a similar childhood experience, although a little different. A friend told me he had a crush on me and we started “dating” because I liked him as a friend and thought this was something I had to do. It wasn’t something I really wanted but with everyone having relationships at the time, I thought I needed someone. I eventually broke it off, thinking I was lesbian. Now I know I’m aroace
@@youate2111 no one asked+Atleast I have actual friends +Ratio
@@ArtisticAngelLucas actual friends? You mean those discord boyfriends
Those aren't real little girl 💀💀
This topic was really brave of you to address. Thanks so much. You've both helped and educated a lot of people.
I like how you didn't overshare. Like, the entire statement is that we're all strangers that refused to listen to the stranger danger rule really hit me. People use the internet like a diary sometimes, so it's pretty refreshing to have a surface level talk, but not a deep sea dive into the life of someone I really honestly don't know.
Jaiden is cool and awesome!
Genuinely, as someone who realized I was aroace pretty recently, this means so much to me. It’s nice to see other people experiences pretty much the same things as me. I really appreciate this video! (The searching for a crush thing hits so close to home for me)
READ MY NAME!!!!
I've always thought being able to say you're "Ace" sounded so cool, and thinking on it, adding "Aro" to it makes it sound like you're saying "Arrow Ace" which straight up sounds like a superhero name.
TRU
EXACTLY MY THOUGHT LMAOOO
Or a Pokemon move
@@MechaFlyer exactly
It's literally a superpower anyway
I absolutely cackled when Jaiden began talking about how being AroAce is the coolest orientation. My little sister is Aromantic and she has the exact same energy and makes fun of me for being having mushy bisexual feelings. It's hilarious and I kind of love it.
She's aromatic? Does she smell like flowers or like mud? Be specific.
@@Ivngkt Sorry to reply to your trolling again, but I don't understand this joke you keep making. You've made it before, you've established that you KNOW nobody else is referring to an aroma, but you keep mentioning it.
@@kwingle it’s because aromatic sounds like aromantic I guess. Still, a joke stops being funny when you endlessly repeat it.
@@scootermcpeanuts6699 of course, but youre right, it just becomes stale.
This honestly made me so happy to see someone, especially a person who's so big on the internet, speaking about being aroace. For so long, I thought I was SUPPOSED to feel romantic attraction, but this video has really helped me feel better. This video made me realize that I myself may be aroace and it feels so much better knowing that there are more aroace people out there, thank you. :]
The vid actually has me questioning if I'm somewhere under the umbrella. I wouldn't have thought so, but it may be worth more research. I can definitely identify with over-rationalizing everything and not being on the same emotional wavelength as most everyone else.
Take a look into the term "amatonormativity" as well!
@@jimnelson9949 It's totally worth looking into more, there's a lot of more specific terms that fall under the Aro and Ace umbrella's, so it's entirely possible you could find a term that feels right for you
its so interesting hearing this side when im the complete opposite, pansexual, hypersexual, hyperromantic, every thing i do is basically based off the love i feel towards someone (which can be overwhelming to most and leads to me being alone anyways).
same
That's rough buddy, but seriously, that must be very hard sometimes
You literally just described me, but bisexual
Oh damn! I already had no idea asexuality was a thing and your teaching me something new as well!
I'm Pansexual and its pretty interesting hearing the opposite and yeah I feel you most things I do is based on how much love I feel towards them and it gets overwhelming and I hate it because its not that I don't like someone or don't want to do something for a someone reason I just don't feel like doing something for what reason I feel like it's so unfair I treat someone better then the other because I don't love or love them and I feel like I'm going to lose a friendship or a relationship.
And not sure if anyone believes in astrology or just zodiacs but I'm a Libra and when I lose a relationship I have a hard time going on from the break up and I just keep the emotions of anything I feel to myself and can't get to tell anyone about them it hurts when being overwhelmed added with whatever else bad I'm feeling
This completely validates and assures literally everything my ace friend has been saying for years. Thank you so much
Same for me with my Sister!
Damn this was TWO years ago??? Where did the times go bro, I swear this was just months ago for me lol btw congrats on your new cat, Toaster! She’s very cute lol
tostada!!!! >:(
@ it autocorrected but I thought it was funny so I kept it lmao
@@nikkiyoung8048 lollll ok u get a pass 💀
@@nikkiyoung8048 Lmaaoo
Those "tunnel vision" moments hit close to home. I don't think I've ever related this close to a video until now. Thank you for being comfortable enough to talk about these experiences Jaiden 😊
READ MY NAME!!
Same tho! It brought so many flashbacks from previous so called “crushes” of mine, it’s ridiculous XD my aroaceness was painfully obvious.
@@jonathanwilson5355 Exactly! I honestly had no clue why it was happening
12:20 No we all know what makes us human is correctly identifying the squares with traffic lights in them.
select all images with bicycles in them
I had to try that 7 times in a row to get it right once… there must be something wrong with me
@@Chroma10008 well i mean you are a computer
@QUEEN1997. It’s ok I did that too lol 🥲
When I get them wrong and they think I'm a bot....m
Jaiden:Love is supposed to have emotions and not…a business exchange.
Spy x Family:Let us introduce ourselves
Lmao
@@ky55thmainaccountfan85 where it’s warm :)
@@ky55thmainaccountfan85 yes, because we’re all so HOT!
lmao
No just no.
"They're just a friend." Sorry, you have just been level 80 friend-zonedb
i feel that "choosing a person to have a crush on" thing so hard. when i discovered the aroace spectrum it was just so freeing. and also kind of isolating because almost everyone else around you doesn't feel what you feel. or... i guess i don't feel what they feel.
anyway this video is a BIG MOOD and i always feel nice inside when i find out a content creator i follow shares this spectrum with me. it's just nice to know there's people out there like me, yknow?
Realising I'm demisexual was huge for me. I also did the choosing thing as a kid, it just felt wrong to not have a crush on someone even if I really didn't
I honestly didn't know of anyone else who did this! I looked back at younger me doing that, and at the time thinking they were real crushes, and thinking "wow, that is really weird, and you were really confused on what a crush actually was." I'm not aro/ace, I just am not into the opposite sex, but it was so amazing to hear someone else doing that! I found the video suprising relatable, and know it must be so awesome for people who actually are aro/ace. I love the rep this gives them, and the support and love.
The whole "thinking you should have a crush because everyone has a crush" hit me so hard. As a demiromantic, I had a similar experience: my friends would crush on a boy they barely talked to or some shit and I was sitting there like "how do you decide that? did you just look at him and somehow figure out that he's the one". I was expecting, like, some little light to light up when I looked at someone, then while talking about the few crushes I've had in life, my BFF pointed out how they were all friends I was close to, and I went _oh._
God SAME. I can count the amount of crushes I've had on one hand and they've all been people over been close friends with, so my friend then saying "hey demisexuality and demiromanticism is a thing" I was like WHAT. It literally opened my eyes and explained so much and made me feel seen.
Whas a demiromantic
@@kaboom801 “A demiromantic person is someone who only develops romantic feelings for another person when they have a strong emotional connection to them. Demiromantic people can be of any gender identity or sexual orientation”
@@kaboom801 Demiromantics are people who only feel romantic attraction to those they've already become strongly emotionally connected with. Think the Friend to Lovers trope.
Demisexual is the same 'need to be emotionally connected first' but for the physical side of attraction (aka thinking that the person is hot) rather than the romantic side.
Does that help? =D
@@FaisLittleWhiteRaven Ye thank u. =D