Being Not Straight
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- Опубликовано: 19 мар 2022
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Music:
Heartwarming (PMD2)
Spinda's Shop (PMD2)
Kecleon's Shop (PMD)
Friend Arena Steppe (PMD) 
Кино
apologies if the audio sounds different, my mic exploded during recording
It’s fine!
Oh lol it’s okay lol
It's ok We love you
O
its perfectly fine 🙂
"WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE"
Literally the best line in the whole video.
“We’re all strangers not listening to ‘stranger danger’”
and
“We’re all pretending to be adults”
have their moments, but yea
also relatable for fellow aroace folks
well for me it was different
i was a lil gae boi (gae moment lol)
and then i always wanted to be interested in the older guys (like 16+ older)
and then middle school hit...
and uhh...
im still obsessing with the same exact guy :-)
even though there probably 18 by now...
welp rip for me ig lol
exactly 😂
I heard that once
Ok twice
Three times
+
Im lonely
Ok, speaking as someone who is in High School and desperate for affection… Jaiden’s story about thinking “man I don’t have a crush on anyone, I guess I keep getting unlucky” really hit close to home… but I don’t think I’m aromantic? Because despite not feeling any romantic attraction I still deeply crave a romantic relationship, because theoretically, it sounds really nice and like something I would enjoy. And at this point I’m not sure if I’m just bad at identifying my own emotions, keep getting “unlucky”, or am somewhere on the aromantic/demiromantic spectrum.
THISSS ^^^^^^^^^
same but tbh you prolly just at an ugly school like me 😭
A lot of effort into this single comment
@SoundFoodist omg??
I'm 13 luckily I don't have to worry about that :)
I am a boomer. It took me a long time to realize what i was. I was raised in an environment where being homosexual was the worst thing possible. I’ve come to realize i am asexual. I felt ashamed of myself for years with no knowledge. Thank you for opening up Jaiden it makes even an old timer like me not so alone.
Lol
Good for you :)
Good luck on that journey
Everyone who dont have bitches is asexual right?
A boomer watches jaiden? That's kinda wierd
"romance and intimacy is what makes us human" well guess i'll just be a silly little alien
Zinky zoogle, zeekybooble beeble meep 👍
Bogos binted 👍
I'm the garlic bread creature, 🍞🧄
@@FreeFilastin No joke, garlic bread is my absolute favorite bread. Now I want some
@@galacgacwatson3102 Same, take a bit out of me I'm the garlic creature.
When I was younger I thought a crush was someone you hated because you wanted to crush them 💀
💀
Oh god 💀
That is one of the most aroace thing I have ever heard
💀
tsundere /j
*”In the nicest way possible, its none of your business”* is literally the most understandable thing I’ve ever heard
READ MY NAME!!!!!
!!!!!!!!
Ok ash
For reall XD
Whaaaa no, how dare she not provide details on her intimate life, I'm a long time sub which means we are basically friends! What's a toxic parasocial relation?
@@SpiritOfHugs thats what im sayin, these chronically online kids istg 💀💀💀😭😭
Having a crush on someone isn't.... wanting to be their number one best friend?
THATS WHAT I THOUGHT-
Hold on while I rethink my life 🫠
I thought it was a bug
It is, right? Or am I in denial?
unfortunately...
And I get called "innocent" a lot for not catching hints and winks.
As a fellow Aro/Ace, this was great. To your point at the end about "coming out" feeling weird, it absolutely is for aro/ace people. We aren't coming out as gay, we just aren't interested. It feels like telling someone you don't have a favorite sports team because you don't watch sports. Also, most people in your life already probably know you are comfortable being single, they may not know the term aromantic or asexual, but they know you aren't the kind of person to always be dating someone. So "coming out" as aro/ace feels more like educating people on the terminology than it feels like telling them something you've kept secret.
For most of my life, I just thought I was a broken straight guy. I "dated" a bit in high school, but just as you did with crushes, that was more about trying to fit in than something I wanted. I was like 25 years old when I first read the terms "aromantic" and "asexual" on an online list of sexualities. I remember reading the description and going "That one! That's it, that's me, I didn't know there was a word for that."
Also, aro/ace has the coolest colors on the flag. Purple, green, and grey go look so good!
How did u figure out u were aroace? I’m kinda questioning it rn
Ain’t reading all at’
Jaiden thinking she's bi or pan because she was equally disinterested in everyone is the funniest thing to me.
Seems to be a common aro-ace experience, I had the same thing happen to me. Thought I was pan for at least a year. 😂
yeah i started thinking i was bi for the same reason and then lockdown hit and i started using my brain lmao
no I feel it so bad though
I thought I was bi and greyro UNTIL NOW am I just aro wtf I am having a crisis
i've read somewhere (so cmiiw) that long ago bi people included ace in the label because of the same thing, being 'equally unintrested'
That's how me discovering my aromanticism worked 🤣
"WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE" would be an awesome senior quote
I’m stealing it.
I think I'll try setting that as my senior quote
@@carlbrutanawanadelwski7026 Ok sure bud, none of us believe your crap. Go get a job freak, instead of framing a youtuber because of your jealousy.
@@TheDerplox no lmao
That's the one I'm going to be using in two years
God I know this animation is two years old; but having just tried to come out as ace, this is still so comforting to rewatch. It’s nice to know I’m not alone
I am I fellow bisexual. Hello!
Congrats!! Realizing you're ace can be so freeing. I wish you happiness, fellow ace! ^_^
You're not alone!
I'm considering being straight/aromantic, and it's nice to see everyone else in this comment section.
when this video came out, it helped me realize I'm on the aromantic spectrum, and even though it's been a couple years I'm still learning new things about it, especially with not being asexual and then also being trans, any form of intimate attraction gets confused with dysphoria and stuff. It's like the suspension bridge effect
Same :3
Same😅
"We're all pretending to be adults here!"
jaiden has perfectly summed up the internet experience
And the life experience
You like beef bro
@@Radioactive-Braincell88 yeah it's alright, minced beef good in Bolognese
and the comment section experience on this video
7 year olds setting their age to 100 setting up their account on anything
Shout out to anyone who doesn’t hate on people for being different
facts my fella, spit your shit indeed! /ref
Thanks I’ll take it
I'm homophobic
I’m actually really glad Jaiden made this video because I don’t think things like this are discussed enough because sexual and romantic feelings are experienced and expressed wildly differently and topics of feeling neither kinds of attraction are like.. ever talked about. So thanks Jaiden, this was super comforting to realize everyone feels differently with this stuff. (I’m asexual and this helped me to realize that)
Same. Im asexual, too! I think im also aromantic, but idk, cuz i dont get out much.
Some asexuals: "I don't feel anything, something is wrong with me"
Chad Jaiden: "I don't feel anything... You all are ugly"
Honestly I resonate with Jaiden with the ugly part. Don't take it personally tho.
I agree
No Sigma Jaiden
I call people gross when they ask if I have a crush
Fr as an ace I can confirm 😅
I’m not aromantic but i agree with the not-getting-why-being-just-friends-is-a-bad-thing point. Friendship rocks. No kisses i suppose, but still great
Edit: this was not meant to cover every situation or be seen by many people at all, agh! I totally understand it being extremely painful when someone you have deep romantic feelings for doesn’t share them! I do think sometimes friendships, particularly male-female friendships, aren’t appreciated enough on their own unless they have the possibility of leading to a relationship. I was more trying to refer to that concept, though I realize I didn’t make that clear. I was sort of imagining a low-stakes situation of an acquaintance shooting their shot with another acquaintance (which could also be scary or embarrassing depending on the individual situation of course, but I figure it could also turn into a friendship if the awkwardness was surmountable). If you were rejected by someone you had romantic feelings for, I promise I’m not trying to dismiss that hurt, this comment was not meant to be universally applicable! And ending a friendship because it’s painful or awkward for this reason is absolutely not inherently a bad choice.
Edit part 2: rewatching the video, I think I also should have phrased the sentence as understanding a feeling rather than agreeing with a point.
well as she said its an emotional thing, if you really like someone an they reject you it can feel crushing it makes it hard to be around them
What are you kidding me kisses suck hugs all the way
virgin gang lit af
Especially if those hugs last longer than 20 seconds and feel actually genuine instead of weak!
Having a mismatch in the level of care you have for someone hurts, it isn't insurmountable but it is an understanding reason for someone to be unable to maintain a friendship after they have been rejected. (this works for crushes, marriage proposals, friendships, acquaintances and probably many more examples of relationships between people)
you helped me Jaiden, nobody will ever see the comment but whatever. I have felt the same way all my life, never having a crush EVER and not understanding relationships at all. This video made me realize that I am aromantic and I'm not ashamed of it. If it wasn't for this video I would still be confused and lost, thank you!
I saw the comment.
Me too!
Eya
You are not alone😉
I’m so grateful for this video because I originally had no idea what aroace even was, and now I’ve looked a bit more into it, and I believe I’m an aroace person. Thank you Jaiden, you have shown me part of my identity that I was unaware wasn’t average and what everyone felt :D (that’s a good thing)
“WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE”
Literally the best one liner in the video
It's a question I ask many a minute
Lol
4:01
dang ppl are still commenting on this this was 7 months ago-
lol
“At the end of the day, we are all just strangers ignoring the stranger danger rule.”
Its true lol
@@JayJ101 America is homophobic-af. I'm gonna be direct as can be and ask:
Please help with that by watching and supporting Telltale Atheist, Forrest Valkai and of course also this video here.
S tier quote
@@nenmaster5218 the fuck does this have to do with anything?
Lol true
I used to think having a crush on someone was like a “level up” thing were once you get close enough to them ud have to have a crush on them and wanna date them like it was an xp bar or something 😭
same xd
"WHY ARE NON OF YOU ATTRACTIVE??!!" Cought me dead 🤣🤣🤣
Man, highschool and even college were such a weird time to me. Your "fake developing crushes on people" is resonating with me so much right now.
One of us?
@@lunalee3021 thinking the romance in certain movies and shows is dumb, and having a very, incredibly big hard time even understanding what romance of romantic love feels like is very different. I too think certain romances in shows are dumb and unnecessary, but I'm not aromantic, if anything I'm a hopeless romantic with my partner, if you're heterosexual, do you feel attraction to your same sex? No? Well imagine there is no person in the world with opposite sex, that's how it feels like to aromantics in a romantic way and to asexuals in a sexual way
Relatable
@@lunalee3021 I don't think you understand what an identity is, y'know the thing that makes you, you? Being Asexual or Aromantic is part of an identity because it's who you are. The fact you didn't even consider it's existence is exactly why Jaiden' video was so important to the community; it sheds a light on us and tells people: "yeah, we exist, deal with it."
@@lunalee3021 did you even watch the video
Hearing other Aces say "...wait they're not joking?" about sex songs is the most validating phrase
Righ tho?
its such a common experience lol
I had only recently realized that so many song are about sex and I have been completely blind to ALL of it. I graduate in less than 3 months. I am genuinely questioning everything 💀
true
same XD
As a bisexual, I did the complete OPPOSITE. I thought I was ace because I felt equal attraction to everybody and had no crushes at the time
Same, but it turns out I'm abrosexual according to labels. Dating is hell.
Oh my god that's SO TRUE
I discovered I'm aromantic thanks to this. For the longest time I thought I was a pervert because I was very sexual and I didn't know I was makinbg up for my lack of romantic feelings by being overly sexual, because I don't get romantic feelings, I only get sexual feelings. Finding out I am Aromantioc and NOT assexual was one of my greatest epiphanies.
Thank you for this video jaiden.
i dont identify as aroace, but as an autistic person, the feeling of "well everyone else is feeling this way now so i should probably start doing it too" without understanding thats not how feelings work is very real
As a fellow autistic one, I can relate to that.
I try to but I often struggle with "experiencing feelings". It took me a long time to realize I had feelings for my girlfriend even though I've known her since childhood now because I was never in a relationship before and allways thought I have to instantly fall in love when I see the right one or something.
I still have a lot to learn about relationships but I know that my best friend will be there for me, helping me learning about how to love, in a way.
As someone also on the Autism Spectrum, I also can relate to finding feelings for someone even though I’m not Aroace.
I remember having “crushes” while not understanding that you actually FEEL something
I’m also autistic 😊
I... Miiiiight be Autistic? I've never been diagnosed but the symptoms exist
aaaand.... I used to feel the same way, trying to fit in without even knowing how to emotions
I eventually gave up and decided to just give up and just... act like I want to despite everyone else's ideas and time
I still wonder what the word "Crush" even means lol
Oh my God the "why are none of you attractive?!" being yelled in the room full of people killed me 😂😂😂😂😂
@Savetion (KING OF YT) I know you're a bot, but come on, you couldn't think of anything more clever than "gaymations"?
@Savetion (KING OF YT) I shouldn't be saying this, but you missed the *obvious* opportunity to say "Gayden Animations."
Hey look at that RUclipss report system worked.
Yeah same lol
I know this is supposed to be an at least semi-serious video, but that made me laugh out loud.
“I’ve got my eye on some of you,BEHAVE!” 😂
i watched this video when it first came out two years ago and i related to a lot of it but didnt really admit it to myself. ive been in about 8 relationships and all of them sucked because i felt like i was roleplaying being in love instead of actually loving the other person. i always felt trapped in relationships and as soon as i got in one i would try to find reasons to break up with the other person, and when we did break up, i felt incredibly relieved. being in a relationship felt like a burder instead of feeling good. recently i started looking into aromanticism and i think i might be aromantic and grey asexual. we need more videos like this, talking about aro ace people's experiences. thanks for making this jaiden, youre awesome :)
"We're all strangers not listening to the stranger danger rule"
Yeah that's the Jaiden we know, classic sense of humor too, good start!
@SoundFoodist wtf dude that's horrible
@@youcantakemehottogothese people spit offensive garbage for attention, Jacks dad got mocked, Markiplier’s niece got mocked, these trolls are just animals to be ignored as they scream for attention. Don’t let them drag you down. Jaiden Mark and Jack ignore them and so should we.
@SoundFoodist What is wrong with you? What if you were in her shoes?? You wouldn't like being told this!
@UCf8J8NnXkq7L54lUSeyjtPA again, what the hell dude
What the fuck happened there?
My last girl friend learned that she was aroace, and didnt have any romantic attraction to me at all. She just saw us as really good friends, similar to that college person. We worked through it, and are now BFFs. I'm so proud of her ❤
Thank you for being so supportive of your friend!
This is so cute!
Yooo good for you and your friend
I love stories like this, because it’s how I made one of my best friends. Hope you guys are doing great!
The world needs more people like you 🤍💜
i think almost every ace/aro go through the "guess I'm bissexual" phase with the same reasoning that 0 attraction is "equal" attraction 😅
I rlly liked this video, especially because i don't usually see ppl talking about this. I'm an asexual lesbian, and whenever i say that, ppl just go "WHAT? How is that possible??" bc they think if you're ace, you're automatically aro too. I just loved the way you explained things and i rlly hope ppl start understanding more these concepts bc otherwise i'd have to explain that EVERY time 😰
asexuality and being lebsian literally contradict...hypocrites!!
@@NerdinessD you clearly cant read.
@@NerdinessD this comment and other comments that you put under this video replying to people and stuff really proves that you don’t know anything about aroace people you’re just stupid.
@@NerdinessD kid named sexual and romantic attractions functioning separately:
@@NerdinessDwant me to explain a concept to you? There are different types of attraction. Romantic, intimate, aesthetic, familial, platonic. One can be homoromantic and asexual
That “wait, they’re *not* joking??” moment is so accurate. This entire video describes what I was trying to figure out up until like a year ago. And the happiness of figuring it out, you’re not broken, this is a thing. It so upsetting in a good way? Relieving almost.
She did a great job on the video and you're valid.
everyone is valid mate
Fr I was so emotional watching this, means a lot just to feel seen
Demi was like this except when I found someone I liked and was suddenly like "oh that is feelings that happen' hm".
I just watched that part 😨
This was literally my aroace awakening. This was the first time I heard of these terms and I was like, “OH. OHHHHH. That’s why everyone is unattractive.”
Same
Why, sad that have to poke fun at others instead of looking at your sad, miserable life?@@noname-lf8yr
@@noname-lf8yr You're cringe. Next question.
@@noname-lf8yryour life must be pretty sad if you don’t have anything better to do other than hating on others because of their sexuality
no, it wasn't. you're 12-16 years old and you spend too much time on the internet
"WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE" I legit cracked-
i found out about a term under the Areoace umbrella it’s called Cupioromantic! i did a little bit of research and i feel like i fall under this term. The definition of Cupioromantic is “Cupioromantic is a micro-label orientation that describes someone who doesn't feel romantic attraction but desires a romantic relationship.”
do what you want with this information but it’s a fun term i found.
I feel the same way.
“No one presented to me OTHER options.” Wow, WOW this hit hard. It took me a long time to finally realize I was Ace, it was a revelation that being Ace was a legitimate THING and not just me being indecisive/selfish/weird.
“We’re all just strangers refusing to listen to the stranger danger rule”
THAT IS THE REALEST THING I HAVE HEARD IN A WEEK!!!
It's been 2 years since I watched this video, but thank you so much for coming out. It helped me discover my identity, and it must have helped many others too.
I respect you for sharing this so publicly and stepping out of your comfort zone.
I know Jaiden referred this as the cliff notes version but honestly I learnt so much from this. This video is definitely going to help a lot of people out there :)
I have 24 kids in my basement
@@rohitbhattarai2243 Wha-
@@rohitbhattarai2243 ;-;
@@rohitbhattarai2243 help me some guy kidnapped me and 23 others
@@rohitbhattarai2243 OMG SAME!!!!
"I hope you can understand even just a little of what I talked about, and if not, I just hope you can be nice." Standing ovation for that line, honestly. So many people who don't understand something use that as a reason to dismiss or invalidate it, but not fully being able to comprehend something doesn't make it impossible to have compassion for those who do experience it. (As someone who is constantly confused by other people, I have firsthand experience in this.)
Also, major kudos for the approach of this video. Using your platform to speak up for those who don't often feel seen is a really admirable thing to do, and maintaining boundaries of your own personal life at the same time is very respectable.
you're soy
By evidence with how other react negatively about this for odd reasons,it's really suck tbh
This helps me a lot, because I been questioning this things, like, girls are pretty, but I don't want any relation of any kind with them
Its funny my dad tells me ill get married some day.
Me: what are you talkin about?! I dont feel that way about any one. I have my video games thats all i need.
My dad: (disappointment)
The video actually taught me im pretty much the same you as jadien so thanks.
"I have my video games, that's all I need" doesn't sound good ngl
But yea, you ofc don't need a wife/husband.
I mean, does one really need to be married to be happy? (MGTOW being an example; and by MGTOW guys I mean the ones that are a part of it and don't obsess over women still)
@@secondone3249 So far, I feel no need to get married whatsoever. But I still am attracted to females sexually.
I have been saying "I am sure I will feel love and affection if the right person comes along" for like the last 10 years. This kinda makes a lot more sense now.
If you mean you're in love with jaiden it's just pixels but if it's otherwise then it's fine
@@Edward_Dusk bruh what 💀
LITERALLY SAME! I've been sad and feeling left behind too, its nice to realise im not alone (:
@Logan Floor {UTTP} They were just saying their experience
@@bellabumble8540 true that, ever since learning I am an ace, I have felt alone, and feel like nobody would understand me. It doesn't change me as a person, just makes me feel, that this is something my close people should know about, but have never had the confidence to say anything
The whole “wait you guys weren’t joking???” Is the ace EXPERIENCE JDHDHD i remember the day i learned what asexual meant and instantly i felt so understood!
jdhdhdjdjfdhdjdhjddjd
I'm demi and listen to a lot of country music, about half of all country music is "there was this very attractive girl who I talked to once, and I am now sad she's going away, because I love her" and I was always like "but... why?
as an ace person, the realization jaiden had in the car was SO RELATABLE!!! "Like what do you mean you actually want to do that kind of stuff with the people you find pretty?? Do people actually feel this way?? I thought it was just a concept" were exactly my thoughts
This comment section has made me lose my faith in humanity then regain it more times than I can count.
Same crazy how homophobic people can be
@@Badnamesarecoolio like imagine fuckin hating a person for not liking people romantically or sexually
@@hibutima3 seriously its crazy
@@Badnamesarecoolio facts, I don't even get what's wrong with the LGBTQ community and I'm straighter than a line 🤦♂️ you can be LGBTQ+ freely if you want to.
Figuring out youre aro or ace or both is so hard bc society really teaches you that you need to be in a romantic relationship and be intimate or you'll be sad and die alone.
@Logan dude ur WEAK lmao
@Logan You don't even have a gf. So shut it.
That's because it's true. Just take the L and stop making it into a label
@@NobleTitty you're so outdated that even boomers won't say crap like this lol
Literally
Everyone else: I'm not in a relationship because I'm not attractive
Jaiden: I'm not in a relationship because everyone else isn't attractive
can relate, i dont think ive found a single person attractive really, i would just look a few times because i liked that some people looked a bit similar to me and move on with my day like nothing happened
True
also jaiden: *walks into a room screaming* WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE
Cringe af!
...why does the make sense lol
I feel so silly about this but the video is old enough that I feel like I can share. I was actually *scared* of this video and only just today worked up the courage to watch it, lol. Topics like this had always caused me discomfort due to my inability to understand myself.
I for the longest time was under the assumption that I was Aro-Ace myself because I was never interested in like having a relationship like that with anyone. I was afraid that intimacy was a thing you had to do and thought that my only option was dating a man as a biological female. I did the same thing in middle school and highschool where I just- decided that ‘Yeah! This guy mark? He’s my crush now because I don’t know most of the other girls like him so that must mean I do too’.
It took me some years to realize that I was not interested in men and even longer to confront the fact that I like women. I spent so long confused with the labels because in my brain it made sense to want to have someone by my side that was like my partner in life but I didn’t want to ‘have’ to do the things you were expected to. I liked kisses and hugs and handholding, the idea of it was very appealing and made me feel happy, but when it came to intimacy I felt dread. I was terrified of being in a relationship because all my life it was explained you had to be intimate with your partner. When it came to being attracted to girls I also feared getting in trouble with my family so I just decided that with my fears that I had to be alone. I looked up what that meant and decided I was Aro-Ace even though I didn’t fully understand what that meant.
For years I claimed to be this way thinking there was no way I could be in a relationship with someone without being comfortable. I thought that no matter what I was going to have to do something that made me unhappy or uncomfortable. It also felt like any girl around me who was ‘attractive’ wasn’t worth attempting because they’d all want the same thing so soon after we got together. I knew I didn’t want to be intimate, at least not for a long while, even though it was something you’re supposed to do. I never felt those emotions that drove a person to want to be physically intimate and anytime I tried to get help people always told me ‘you want a good friend’. I accepted that as truth even though I knew a part of me felt far beyond that for some people.
Then I started to engage with the LGBT community despite how much I’d been corralled away from it and it was so overwhelming how much information there was. In the end I found out that while I’m romantically attracted to people I’m not attracted physically which is okay! Which is a thing and plenty of people are the same way. I cried with relief finally being able to understand who I am and that there are people like me out there.
I’m happy to report that as an adult I have found my first girlfriend who understands that about me and respects it! We’re going to have our one year anniversary shortly here and I couldn’t be prouder to be ace myself! Thank you for this video and all you do Jaiden. Sorry this comment is so late!
As a stranger on the internet, I'm proud of you!
As another stranger on the internet going through a similar situation, I’m proud of you!
My daughter, 13 going on 14, just asked me what romantic feelings are like, and after a long talk, we discovered that she may Aro Ase! I sent her this video for more insight.
Thanks for being a good dad like that!
@@RichardMontgomeryYT My daughter is the best person I've ever known. She deserves to be her.
@@MistsMagic bloody awesome mate, really proud of you.
@@RichardMontgomeryYT I really appreciate that
thanks for being awesome lmao
As someone who isn't aro nor ace nor both, I have to say that the whole "WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE" bit hit suprisingly hard lol 😂
Bro I know, but also 6:43, “I got math involved somehow…”🤣 so good.
READ MY NAME!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!
I felt no attraction to anyone for YEEARS and only now am I actually in a relationship with someone, and even that took like several months of talking to them and hanging out
Demisexual?
@@psychomanatee3459
YEEEEPPPP
My GF and I were completely Demi until each other lmao
Was pretty funny when we discussed the feelings we felt for each prior to the Confession™️
"So I made up a crush" is one of the most relatable things I've ever heard. I distinctly remember being in middle school and everyone talking about crushes and when I was asked about mine I just mentioned a close friend, and I did the same thing like a year later with someone else, and then the same when I got into high school, and I kept feeling like I wasn't doing something right.
I eventually discovered I was aromantic and asexual but everyone around me was so weird about it. A teacher even told me "how are you going to teach your kids about sex if you've never had it?" Which- no comments honestly.
I'm much happier now knowing exactly where I want my relationships to be and not stressing over which I'm expected to have. Great video Jaiden :) thanks a lot!
READ MY NAME!!!!!!!!
A teacher said that? Who says that to a student wtf-
Wait what? How are you gonna have kids to talk to in the first place? Not only was that inappropriate but it doesn't even make sense.
That teacher really didn't think that through huh
That teacher…… is a real weirdo
Greetings fellow traveler, it appears you’re taking a stroll through the newest comments section. I warn you now as this route will lead you to a bunch of comments that will bring you down to eternal stupidity. With that, have a nice day.
im in too deep to stop now ☹️☹️
but... but the doomscroll compels me
my best (female) friend is aromatic and asexual and i'm asexual (man). a lot of people asking if we're together/ a couple because we get along very well. some find it weird that we don't want to be a couple, like why don't you try it? you might like it. things like this, i find annoying because i find that these days everything needs to sexualized and romantised
Man, exactly!!!
If someone ever passes you a note that says "do you like me yes or no" just just tell them I'm not registered to vote
I saw that meme and it made me laugh like a lunatic
I get it
Dude yes
I would just do
A: Tell them they made a mistake
Or
B: Just rip it up
Or eat the paper 😏
Dude the “picking a crush out to feel like I’ve reached my emotional quota” is such a mood. I’m autistic and have always struggled feeling left out because I’ve never felt romantic attraction.
right? same with dating people because i wanted to like upgrade them from friend to like best friend / dedicated friend
Literally SAME! It took me years to realize that my “crushes” on boys at school was really just the gender envy I had of masculine people… turns out I fall under the non-binary umbrella and just wanted to be more masculine. I don’t know if my neurodivergency has anything to do with inability to feel intense romantic attraction towards someone, but the thought of marrying someone and living with them forever just sounds… unpleasant.
feels bad man
Dude, same here! Does Asperger Syndrome ring a bell?
yeah this def feels like the autism experience right here
-what gender do you prefer to like?
Jayden: “no”
AroAce is not a gender, though?
@@Diogo85Jaiden isn’t attracted to either females or males or non-binaries or really anyone in a romantic way.
I think it's crazy that people tried to disprove it You're not saying you can't care about someone you just don't feel romantic love but you still love your family and your friends as well as your birds in no way is that sound like a robot to me!! 💕💕
You see, I'm not aroace, but holy shit do I relate to "Society expects you to be in a relationship."
Tell 'em, always annoyed with people badgering me about it.
me too
Especially now when my friends try to ship me with people when it's not their business in the first place
At 25 my psychiatrist asked why I never was in a relationship and I countered with "How is that connected to my suicid attempt" His response was going on a long rant about the word of god and me looking up other psychiatrists mid session
It's especially annoying when you do tell someone multiple times that you don't want children or a bf/significant other and they laugh at you and tell you that you'll find someone one day. I want to focus on myself and the thought of being in a romantic relationship or having children grosses me out I want nothing to do with either of those things
As a straight man, I found this video not only informative but helpful to my personal understanding of relationships and whether it is that I want to be in one or I feel pressured to be in one. This is an amazing follow-up to a previous video of yours and I'm glad you were able to talk about things in ways that people don't necessarily do.
damn respect bro
i agree
I agree, especially the part of “you can be happy on your own”, it’s something so basic but it stills hits really hard hearing it or trying make that sink in
... This video helped me finally accept some parts of myself I was afraid to confront for a long time. I think the aroace colors suit me much better anyways :)
Congrats pal. Green, purple and a good old gray gradient are awesome colours 💜
Love the line “WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE!” 😂
Because you're severly autistic 🤓🤓🤓
That’s how Ace rep should be, none of that freaking out about not wanting to sleep with anyone, but freaking out about why no one is attractive! 😅 and then finding out sexual and aesthetic attraction are two different things. (its a more inclusive approach)
When you aren't ace and this is a problem 😩
same
was my fav line
James: Has a girlfriend
Jaiden: Is aroace
Fanfiction artists: Let's go ahead and ignore that
oh no you had to remind me (vietnam war flashbacks)
@@indescribablycoolikeafurniture i have the cold war flashbacks (soviet union fall)
@@novianimates ah yes, the fall of our beautiful motherland...
Oh dear....
That's because majority.
More is power
I love how other characters just are placeholders, always loved that tactic as an animator
I just love the fact how many homophobic comments in this section are written by 11 year olds, yet they are almost indistinguishable from stuff adult homophobes say. It's hilarious.
"That's not gay what the hell is that"
That line was too funny
Owlhouse amphibia yes amazing marcy best character
@Jack Wrath uhm no
Ayyy my gang
Amphibia 4 life
It was pretty funny
"WHY ARE NONE OF YOU ATTRACTIVE?!" You're fantastic. I really relate to all of this -- like, in a way that has me thinking "Okay maybe I do need to reevaluate some things I thought I knew about myself" -- and I really appreciate that you made the video even though it opens the door to a lot of people speculating and making assumptions about your personal life.
Even as a gay man I related to that part. Just replace everyone with girls lol.
yg
Time stamp 4:03
Honestly I think we need more people talking about aero/ace and platonic love more because it really feels like being in a relationship is something that people kinda pressure other people into.
yes. And what I feel more is how much people just straight up give all and I mean ALL their attention to those relationship when and if it comes, and you kinda just stays there like : ok let's not be friends anymore since you found the one I guess...?
Like it's always all or nothing..
honestly I'm gonna get pretty open with this comment. I'm gay, and i didn't know i was gay for 8 years. at first seeing this video i thought i was aroace because i didn't like anybody. i realized i was gay when i started to realize i was only scoping out girls and not boys. me and my partners anniversary was today. i love him so much❤❤.
good for you :D
Nice! That's great for you.
“That’s not gay what the hell is that” goes crazy
Real 😭😭😭 like pretty much all ignorant or uninformed people think you’re either gay or straight and that’s it
"It's none of your business"
It's shocking how quickly people forget that. They carry on like your (lack of) orientation actually affects them personally. I sincerely hope none of your detractors have scared you away from continuing to make amazing content.
thats nice
Serious question.
If it's none of your business, then why would you talk about it, in the first place? (In a RUclips video, ofc.)
@@Some-Bad-Editor To help other people who are feeling a similar thing using a large platform can help people to understand themselves if the creator is feeling something similar
@@Some-Bad-Editor because the content creator chooses to share that info. Anything beyond what the creator chooses to share is nobody's business, that's the point.
In Jaiden's case, she's helping to raise awareness about aro/ace, which a lot of people didn't know about (myself included). Jaiden gave a boost to the popularity of Nuzlockes and Mario Kaizo, so this video is sure to raise awareness about being aro/ace.
@@Some-Bad-Editor This is because Jaiden wants to share this part of her personality to help us better understand her, but she doesn’t want to share more personal information.
This vid has legit helped so much in me figuring out my sexuality, kudos to you Jaiden!
ill be real, this sounds better than being straight🥲
well if it sounds better, why not just like… try being aroace? nothing will change besides like. not wanting to date people
@essonyoutube you don't get to choose your sexuality...it's something you're born with from the start of your life
@@J0sterr_ yep I didant get to choose to be aromantic but I’m happy I’m not dateing pepole and I’m gonna be a virgin for life may sound like I, sarcastic but actually I’m an introvert
@Waltyworld yeah i totally get you lol
Actually I'm surprised up 'til this day people are commenting on this video💀
@@J0sterr_ you dont get to choose your sexuality but you dont get to choose things like the foods you enjoy either. second best way to find out is to try
"why is no one attractive" is hella relatable. I'm learning more about myself as well because of this video.
Ooop
@SoundFoodist nice bait bro no one cares
I’m ace but I still experience aesthetic attraction. So people look nice, but there’s no emotion.
I have the opposite problem, "why is everybody attractive"
@:D same
I love how humans can be so different, I am genderfluid and pansexual which means I can fall in love with anyone. Some pansexuals use the "hearts not parts" saying which means personality matters and not what is in their pants
Gotta love how if you go in the recent tab you’ll be bombarded with 7 yr old kids that are going “this not sigma”
Fun fact: bread is one of the major things that make us human
garlic bread is one of the major things that make us ace
fun fact: i have done nothing but teleport bread for 3 days
soldier that's not a question@@blackholeguy1529
And baguette is the major thing that make you French human, if ur french tho
As a german person on the ace-spectrum, I very much agree.
12:34 I don't know if this was intentional or not, but I love the idea of an aroace person expressing platonic affection and following it up with "no romo"
Dude. You just got me the new phrase ill say every day of my lofe, thank u
the new aroace trump card
Aramco ?
Yeah, no! That's a common thing! Very much a joke at the 'no homo' crowd, but yeah. Definitely a thing in the aro community, and I love it so much!
some people find it offensive to act like No Homo is just a funny thing to reference but yeah No Romo is very commonly said in the aro community as a joke about things
I think the best relationship is just being best friends 😎
Yo bfdi pfp
2 years i've been rewatching this vid. Discovering I was Ace made the puzzle of my life a bit more complete and this video feels like what I felt back then. Love yall! Platonically!
Alright. James has a girlfriend, Jaiden is aroace. *No more shipping them.*
Edit: Jesus Christ this reply section is the scariest sh-t ever.
They will probably make something up to continue the shipping
@@invisiblemaninthesky7927 They tried to say it's non canon
I think...
or just never ship them
Deadass
FINALLY SOMEONE SAID IT
"We're all pretending to be adults here," is one of the best things I've heard in a while.
That aside, it is lovely to see a video covering these topics. (:
Right?? We're all just Children at heart whether we live to be 90 or not. The difference is that, some folks that they're Children and LIVE life full of Vitality 'n all WHILE most pretend to be adults and get all bitter/grumpy due to responsibilities and "old age."
It's anyone's pick honestly 🤣🤣
*some folks have accepted that they are CHILDREN and...
I am a child
I agree, but on a sidenote, why do you do (: for a smiley face instead of :)??? Random thought lol
“Teens are just big children, and adults are even bigger children.”
You’ve helped me find myself Jaiden for awhile I’ve never had a crush and I’ve been wondering why until I found this video and when I watched it I realised I’m Aromantic so all I have to say is Thank you Jaiden ❤
This video blew my mind it was the perfect RUclips video in my opinion it was personal but not invasive comfortable and supporting informational and funny and jut there to enjoy not to push things on you also the just awkward feeling as they talk makes this video so human and warm keep up the good work
I relate so much to her talking about her childhood "crushes". This video is literally the perfect explanation of what it is to be aroace
though i ended up being mostly gay i can relate too because i used to have "crushes" on girls in the exact same way 😭
ikr right it basically feels like she told my own life story
Same, just in a slightly different way. My mom asked me who my school crush was, after humming and hahing for a bit, I just said who I thought was the prettiest. I had zero inclination of ever dating that person. TBH I still don’t really understand crushes, like are they just the person you find the most attractive or is there something more?
@@evilemuempire9550 i can feel your confusion sis/bro….. it’s such a strange concept for me
girl who had a crush on bowser is valid tho
"Hitting my normal human emotions quota" is a fucking great summary of my autistic school/high school experience, teenage me was dumb, trying to fit in instead of being himself and happy.
I felt that
Best Asexual-Coverage i know: 'The Take'.
BUT who's really in a critical Situation right now is Trans-People.
I hope as many as possible from this empathic comment-section here go
and watch 'Telltale Atheist' and his videos on current problems
and more specifically Trans-Right-Bills!!
Please inform yourself, as well as with the specific video:
"Michigan Governor Kidnapping Plotters - Trials Begin" (i think especially of the end-speech)!
Oh gosh that's a mood as someone who's autistic too
Si el intentar encajar es difícil
I'm both
This video: exists
Literally Every 6 year old simp:😭😭😭
Message to those 6 year old simps: Womp Womp
OK who cares
@@NerdinessD literally noone in all of humanity cares, but clearly you took the time to comment so you must care
@@NerdinessD WOW, this is unbelievable, I have lost the count of how many homophobic and Sexist comments I have seen from you and your other friends, so, you know how much time you took to comment all that? I don't even know! This must be really important to take soooo much time throwing hate and all that stuff dude, and you say that "who cares"? Well, I care of it, because you are "the future of the world". And if that's true, the future will be chaos.
@@remi820 true
THIS VIDEO IS TWO YEARS OLD 😭
The “tunnel vision” feeling you described sounds a lot like platonic attraction, aka “the reason it took me 20 years to realize I was aroace,” because I was like “ah, yes. This must be that ‘crush’ thing everyone talks about.”
Today I learned what Aromantic means and the last three decades are starting to make a lot more sense. Thank you for making this video.
It's never too late to get to know yourself
@@yasminechoerryscherry3701 I completely agree! I am so excited for my future now that I understand myself better.
@@fergerj I’m not exited
@@bill1357 exited?
I honeslty thought that aromantic was part of being asexual and this is the first time i have heard the term. Good to know.
Watched this a few months ago and found out I'm aroace because of it. It's nice to come back to this video now and then. It's very comforting. Thank you Jaiden.
Proud of you dude :D
Hope no one I know sees this comment but this video helped me see that I might be aromantic at some level (I’m in middle school)
>=} you can't hide from me.
And from me
As a stranger on the internet, I'm proud of you. Keep doing you!
Oh my goodness "zero is equal to zero" is EXACTLY the reason I thought I was bi/pan for the longest time in highschool. I am also aro/ace and just thought everyone was doing the checklist thing too! Thank you so much for a well thought out video that is entirely relatable. I got a little teary eyed at the end!
I read somewhere that aromantics and asexuals were once accepted into the bisexual community before they had their own terms and definitions for that very reason!! The bis were like, "yup 0=0 so I guess you're one of us!" And thus began the vehement bi/ace/aro solidarity that persists today 🤝
Fun fact, back before asexual wasn't it's own sexuality because no one knew that that could happen, bisexuals actually welcomed asexuals into their community as their own because of this understanding.
Update: I sent this to my cousin, who has been trying to be supportive with me being aro/ace (the most supportive out of my family) and she immensely appreciated this video, as it explained things perfectly for her! Thank you again Jaiden for making this video.
As soon as Jaiden said that she was aro/ace, my mind straight went to the flirting video and thought about her mentioning how two people who didn't have a relationship work out should still be able to be friends and how that makes a lot more sense now knowing that she's aro/ace... AND THEN SHE MENTIONED IT IN THE VID AND I HOWLED LMAO
I really thought that for years too. I know I’m aroace now. But even I still kinda think that, which is bad. I just don’t understand attraction like that.
@@Magical8eing same thing here but I'm demiromantic
eh, exes being friends is pretty normal in the queer community, and that's dominated by allosexual people so... I'm not sure that's so much an aro/ace thing.
@@i_a_r_n_a doesnt mean it should be normalized in the world yk. I keep seeing people of your community tryna force that ideal onto bi or straight ppl and its creepy sometimes so i hope you guys can be respectful yk?
@@they_fw_lei You say that like there is something wrong with exes being friends. There isn't. You come across kind of...hateful in that comment.