Unmarried women forced to hand over their babies for adoption - BBC News
HTML-код
- Опубликовано: 21 сен 2024
- Hundreds of British women forced into giving up their babies for adoption in the 1950s, 60s and 70s have called on the UK prime minister to issue a government apology.
Up to 250,000 women in Britain were coerced into handing over their babies because they were unmarried.
Many of the women never had more children and say the loss caused them lifetime of grief.
They want the UK to follow Australia, which in 2013 was the first country to apologise for forced adoptions.
Please subscribe HERE bit.ly/1rbfUog
#BBCNews
This is what grief looks like, real grief that burrows into your soul and all of your life, and it just keeps burrowing until there's no place left for it to go. So it just stays. It stays forever. It has nowhere to go.
I'm crying
Maternal trauma never really heals ❤️🩹
It’s like a scar that keeps opening,
A wound that never heals ,
A sadness that never goes away .
Broken heart
Splinted into a thousand pieces
Like stars ⭐️ scattered across the night sky.
We
The forgotten pain
That no one wants to deal with .
I love you 😘
It’s just soul destroying what these women went through . It was worse in Ireland though the mothers after giving up their baby’s they where then institutionalised and used and abused for years
The British Government has lots of apologies to give.
"Forced"? Ha. What a bunch of utter losers, handing over their children. Utter criminals. They should be in prison, for life, for that crime.
Yeah, abortion.
@@guff9567 Wow, what a smart copy n paster you are, you dipshit.
Satanic government. What happened to those babies? Watch the movie Oranges and Sunshine, it is based on truth. Babies were taken from their mothers and sent to countries like Australia where they were abused by Catholic priests.
Then they should stop sleeping around. That's selfish. Fornication should never be encouraged. It's the child who suffers. Why discourage marriage? Why deprive children of a mom and dad? That's abuse. Stop it! Sheesh! What's wrong with some people? If you really love to have children and want a stable and loving family, get married!!
I hope those children will one day learn they weren't given up and take some comfort that their birth mothers loved them.
They are over 60,what you menton about,do you think they are still children..British when they say sorry,it means,f.off..always they are late always..
I hope these mothers’ pain is alleviated somehow but I don’t see how. It’s a horrible transgression against their rights. I understand this sentiment and I respect it might be true for some adopted people but it is not true for me. I am adopted and I have never felt like there is some part of me that’s missing or unknown. I know myself, I love my family, I am part of them and they are part of me. I know my birth mother gave me up out of love to a wonderful loving pair of parents that I love so much, we are very close and I never want to lose them and I have a wonderful loving extended family I cherish. The mothers who willingly gave their children up for adoption should not be disparaged, many did so not only from desperation but also out of love and hope. I know my birth mother loved me very much and that she was selfless and had so much generosity of spirit when she gave me up. I am lucky that her hope for me came true. I’ve had a wonderful life because of her and I thank her for it. Ok
Okay, okay. My grandmother was one of these babies, my biological great grandmother was from an aristocratic family who worked as a nurse during war time and she fell in love with a Canadian soldier who came to her hospital, who died later on (without her knowing) she became pregnant with my grandmother, she was kicked out of her family and forced to give up my grandmother so she decided to go to Canada in search of her lover, only to discover he had died. My grandmother was adopted by a couple, the husband’s legs had been blown off in the war and he was unable to have kids so they were offered my grandmother (they didn’t really want children but they were a respected couple and he was a war hero). My grandmother was raised by this couple but she didn’t have a good time and didn’t get on great with her adoptive parents. Fast forward years later and my grandmother finally meets her birth mother and apparently they clicked immediately. My great grandmother found love again whilst she was in Canada and got married and had children (she actually married a famous horse trainer - look up the Canadian Bengal lancers)
sorry this is so long but I was excited to share my great grandmothers story!
@@MambaChicka It doesn't sound like you know your mother's story, and thus your own. What if it wasn't the fairy tale you created? The truth sets us free. If you haven't found her, just know it would be such a great healing for her if you did. Trust knowing her will not diminish your happy adoptive family, but only enrich it.
My father was adopted in 1955. We found out through a dna test that his birth parents married a year after he was born and had 3 more children. Yet they never told their children about my dad and my grandmother doesn’t want to know us. It’s not always the case.
"You won't be wicked again" - why, why on earth don't we say "wicked MEN"?! Men should have been seen as responsible for this, not the pregnant women.
Because back in the day,women were expected to be virginal and untouched and not to 'give in' to carnal needs..!
Why were men’s needs ‘ natural’ and women’s needs only allowed to be turned on when a wedding ring was put on their finger?
Rich men were only wicked if they used force or deception, getting girls drunk and so on. Denying parenthood and abandonment were needed to avoid claims of inheritance. Poor men had no money, lived wit their parents. In those aa a couple had to save up before getting msaried, enagements lasted many years Permiission of the bride's father was essential. Chilfdren are exopdensivc and a path had to be beaten for each one.
At that time Nurses were still forbidden to marry.
Given that background it was only natuiral for Nurses to think that any woman who allowed a man anywhere near her must be a prostitute thus wicked Indeed because of the burden of this prejudice that was one result.
iI was an entirelyfdiffernt country back then..
@@headron66Because that's what happens when people are slaves to that "thing" and by that "thing", I mean religion
@@annmitchell4663like have mo human emotions? Why
No “almost” about it. It was totally inhumane.
But raising kids in crippling poverty is humane I guess?? Good to know.
I remember when my neighbour told me about her life in Ireland. It was horrendous and cruel.
Her child was taken away from her at birth because she was not married.
Her life from then on was working in a Magdalen Laundry where she told me how cruel and brutal the nuns could be.
She got out and came to England.
😪
There's a film about it starring Anne -Marie Duff
@@Jeannelawes I know I saw it. Sadly my neighbour died so there is no chance for her daughter ever contacting her mother.
And this happened in the UK too.
How sad, I'm married but refused to do so in a church (I'm French Catholic Montreal but no way was my narcissistic family/divorced horrible parents and older siblings to attend only to ruin) but when it came time to baptize my kids it was awful trying to find half decent clergies to baptize them, I'm doubly glad I was not married in a church, my husband could care less, only married me to force me into breeding for him, so now I've been a stay at home mom for almost 30 yrs! 💋 😇
BBC, can you help those birth mothers interviewed for this program find their children?! Or hand the job over to Long Lost Family? Seriously, those poor women who agreed to be interviewed deserve support.
What about if they don't know they are adopted? They must be around 60 now with families of their own it could cause a lot of hurt to them their not missing what they haven't been looking for, it's heartbreaking seeing the birth mothers like this but tracking them down won't guarantee a happy ending it's a risky thing to do.
@@illumindonnaughty and what if they do know they are adopted? Not intervening is almost as dangerous. in fact as I recall nlotted lling sn adoptted child that it is adopted is an acknowledged form of child abuse.
are you sure you are on the right side on this?
@@illumindonnaughty forget I spoke. There is already a system in place to adresss your cpncerns and many more. I apoloogise for my reactiion. YIur imstinsdtsa re of course correct. In threse matters caution must predominate
@@brucebartup6161 I didn't understand the last bit of your first message?
I was just voicing my opinion in the comments not saying that I'm correct and it shouldn't be done? Was just a concern ✌️
@@illumindonnaughty my apologies again. you didn'yt undrstand beccauuse it was a gsarbked mess.
I unestnd now that yur concrn was mmentary a reactuion noyt policy stsatemmreennt/..
LOng ternm and serioudsy with our thinkinhg hreads fuklllyb enggaedd we agree taht contact can only be wit mutual condsent, othrwie unethicak. Does that suffice?
My gran had to put my dad up for adoption because she was unmarried in 60s glasgow. She 'went on holiday' and gave birth alone.no mother should go through this.
Wow, did they ever reunite?
In the nineties yes,we got to meet my gran.
the guy we heard was the father,he died in the nineties, so we won't get that chance to meet him.
My gran was an amazing lady! I'm lucky to have known her
@@littledancingbear I'm sorry for this general unfolding of events... I'm happy that you had a chance to reunite though... and who knows, if your dad ended up with a loving family, maybe it was God's plan? 🤷♀️ They say all things happen for a reason.. 🤔
@@littledancingbear Happy to hear that 😀 I'm really glad it was happy reunion! And thanks for responding!! 😁👍
Im a single mom since day 1 my son is now 18 and i cant imagine having to give him up under duress my heart goes out to all these women.
I was one of those stolen babies, my mother attempted suicide after, my adoptive family were abusive religious narcissists , we are all scarred for life , the church should also apologise
It was kidnapping. Call it what it is. ALL the victims deserve compensation.
I just want the right to have my adoption annulled. I didn’t consent to it, ever, and yet I have to live with these fake parents on my papers. We should have the right to annul once we are adults, if that’s what we choose.
Now, British parliament apologized for this event. But can british government remove the suffer of thousand women? It will be Impossible.
No instead they target other minorities 😢
More to the point apologise to the children. This also happened in Australia 🇦🇺 I was adopted. My birth mother was 16 and unmarried when she had me at an unmarried pregnant place run by very nasty nuns.
They said horrible things to her and forced her to give me up. I have reached out to her and been rejected again by her. She did tell me just how traumatising the whole thing was and to ever see or hear from me again would pretty much destroy her as me contacting her just the once had caused such horrible flashbacks and feelings. It seems the entire experience caused her to have PTSD.
And didn’t help me either just made everything worse for me. So please don’t forget the poor babies that came from all of this too because they grow up without real roots no knowledge about their own histories that is definitely important for many many reasons. Cheers cherieK 🦋🌈🐿🇦🇺
@@cheriekarley2479 When a mother is found, she is unprepared for the horrible flashbacks. But by now she may have dealt with the memories. If they had remained stored her health would surely have suffered. She may be open to contact now. Try. She didn't reject you. She rejected the unspeakable pain.
@@carolschaefer5538 I have spoken to my Aunt her sister. She’s definitely not interested in me. Thank you for your kind words. Cheers cherieK 🦋🌈🐿🇦🇺
@@cheriekarley2479 I am so so sorry that you had this reaction from your birth mum, hopefully in time she may contact you.
The same had happened to my cousin..and forced to call his own mom aunt..even unto her old age and death..I feel empathy for both ...💔
The actor Jack Nicholson
Grew up thinking his grandmother was his mother.
He was her grandchild.
This was very common back then. 💔
All i can say is, "Hey, where's dad?" Typically, men push & pester & worse to get a gal to have sex with him, then through some general irresponsibility on his part, the condom breaks, she's a lifelong mom, & he skips away, tra la tra la. What is wrong with this story is not her, guys. It is you, yourselves, who need to grow up & become adults, via being parents, & being responsible to her's & your family.
Well said.
True
A woman can rise a child alone.
@@FrancetteJB yes she definitely can but many didn't sign up to be two parents at the same time and still to this day financial, legal and other supports are often 0.
@@FrancetteJB Not in those days.
I was one of those babies given up in 1973...I always wanted to see my mother..and still do..
aamiin
I hope you find her, good luck in your search
This would’ve killed me. I’m an unmarried woman and a single mother to a little girl and it would’ve broke me if I’d had her taken away and put up for adoption without my permission. It’s disgusting what was done to these women.
I thought the same? Thank god society has changed there view on unwed mothers!? 💕
@Rebecca_ Bailey Ummm i was wondering if your daughter is available for adoption. Please i really do want her to be my little girl.
@@CherylStevens-g8kyou're sick. Seriously.
In 1975, my wife was in the maternity ward of an Edinburgh hospital, having delivered my youngest son.
A few beds away was a girl in her late teens or early 20s. She seemed to spend all her time crying. My wife assumed she was suffering from PND and as soon as she was able went over to comfort her.
But if the girl was depressed, it wasn't about the birth. She was unmarried and was being daily harassed by a team of hospital officials and doctors, with a view to handing over her newborn daughter to an adoption service. When my wife intervened at one of these 'consultations' she was told to get back to her bed and mind her own damn business. The girl eventually surrendered her child.
My wife was in no doubt - then or since - that money exchanged hands.
But fornication should never be encouraged. It's the child who suffers. Why discourage marriage? Why deprive children of a mom and dad? That's abuse. Sheesh! What's wrong with some people? If you really love to have children and want a stable and loving family, get married!
@@justdogood7413
Congratulations on setting your watch back a century.
@@jackywhite880 you said it !!!
@@justdogood7413 yes fornication should not be encouraged .there is a big difference in a teenager having a baby and an adult having a baby ..i have a question .....could all these pregnant girls support these babies .....does a 15 year old girl have the maturity to raise their baby or will the responsibility go back on the parents of the pregnant teenager ...i see so many young girls playing adult and end up having babies pushing a stroller on the dole ....higher rates of child abuse,.poverty ..drug abuse...very little prospect...education cut short, not enough money to feed yourself and your child ...its a hard situation to get out of .and what about the risk for sexually transmitted diseases ...that was never brought up in the documentary either ..those children trying to raise children ...and those children being at higher risk of perpetuating the circle over and over .and grand parents are the ones who end taking up the slack ....i see grandmas trying to raise thouse children in their 40s and 50s while those girls are out partying and having a good time ...a 14 year old raising a baby ..no job ,little support ....tons of teens having babies because ....they are lonely .or coming from broken families ..this isnt a doll to be put away and taken out when u want .a baby .yes it was traumatizing and feelings are hurt ..how many parents of those unwed girls actually sat down and talked to their children about birth control, what makes up a good spouse.... how to be in a good relationship ,told about being responsible with their bodies ..none..or very few.... i expect ....for myself ....i know if i would have got into that situation ....i would want to do whats best for the baby ...not what is best for me .... .iwould put it up for adoption ..and learn from the experience ..its not right or fair to put the burden of raising your kid on the grand parents who may or may not have the means to properly raise it or be physically well enough to raise that baby ....and if you have achild when you are a child and decide to keepit .... your life is over as u know it ....children playing adult is a hard reality check . i KNEW i did not have the proper responsibility nor the means to raise a child properly . I knew a penis and a vagina could make a child ...thats the reality ....a baby with colic for days on end ....no sleep for 3 months straight .seizes being cute at the time .no matter how much u love that child ...do u think a teenager is going to have the patience to deal with that ....yes mistakes were made in the past where things could have been handled better..but i would never have put that kind of burden on myself or parents
@@maryleung1425
Privileged BS.
i had an aunt and a mother-in-law, both got pregnant at 14 in the usa in the early 1950s. one was a northern white girl in a middle-class family, one was a southern black girl in a poor family. all those many years later, when each seperately told me their stories, they could not have been more different.
my aunt was secretly swooped away in the middle of the night, not told anything about what was happening to her, to a 'home for unwed mothers' for months until she gave birth, she never saw the baby they snatched from her body, and was shamed and sworn to secrecy upon her return home, told she was lucky they let her back home at all, and not a word was said for decades, until her children from marriage were grown.
meanwhile, my mother-in-law gave birth to the baby she would raise the best she could manage, and without the merest notion that any authority or family member would steal a black baby away from her and give him to a 'better' family.
apparently, american racism worked in women like my mother-in-law's favor, for once- black women didn't produce babies that wealthier white people wanted.
But fornication should never be encouraged. It's the child who suffers. Why discourage marriage? Why deprive children of a mom and dad? That's abuse. Sheesh! What's wrong with some people? If you really love to have children and want a stable and loving family, get married!
@@justdogood7413 copy/paste should never be encouraged. it's the content that suffers. why discourage original comments? sheesh, what's wrong with some trolls?
@@nonyabizness.original 😂😂 Good one.
Horrible just horrible! Give my love to your mother-in-law and your aunt and say I believe that they are brave mothers!🕊❤️
@@justdogood7413 polarizing - copy/paste - bot.
1945-1975 the level of generational trauma is evil and horrific, it is beyond understanding. How could we do this? It’s inhuman.
This is a horrible injustice, & these women deserve an apology, at the very least.
I am a single parent by choice, to an amazing 17 year old son, I love him with all of my heart/soul, he's a good person, brilliant mind, very handsome, & not a criminal just because he was raised by one parent!
Yes, but two good parents are better than one good parent.
It is inherently better to have two parents. I have had three. My natural mother is dead and my Dad is remarried.
They tried to force me to give my son up in 1995, relentless bullying, they risked his very life during birth to try and teach me a lesson, the whole "if you really loved this little boy - you would give him up", he will never amount to anything yadda yadda bullshit - my son turns 26 this year, and each year I remember what they said and I wish they could see what an amazing young man he has turned into dispite their ill will - and I'm so ever grateful that I had him in a time where I *could* stand my ground.
So heartbroken for all these mothers and their babies 💔💕
This was REALLY happening in ENGLAND in 1975.
My wife witnessed a so called social worker telling an unmarried mother that she had to choose which of her (newly born) twins to give up.
Yes, you did read that right. She could keep one only if she gave one away.
This happened in Amersham in Buckinghamshire late in 1975.
That social worker is probably still wandering around getting a pension. (Probably not still working thank goodness.) What is she telling her grandchildren I wonder.
It's heartbreaking to see these women holding back their tears as they tell their stories..
But fornication should never be encouraged. It's the child who suffers. Why discourage marriage? Why deprive children of a mom and dad? That's abuse. Sheesh! What's wrong with some people? If you really love to have children and want a stable and loving family, get married!
@@justdogood7413You are so heartless and cruel. Most of these mothers wanted to marry the father, and yet, he abandoned them. Such happened to my mother, a birthmother. You are incredibly and insidiously cruel-hearted and have no charitable bone in your body if you would chastise these mothers who are finally being given some small acknowledgement of their trauma and loss and able to heal even just a tiny bit. How icy a heart it must be to utter forth a judgment in the same words as they heard back at the time.
Do you really think it possible to force a boyfriend to marry you? Did you know there was a sexual revolution happening but that birth control was not available unless you were married? What mixed messages were being given these youngsters at the time.
And for the record, many adoptees would rather have been raised by their mother alone than given to total strangers, many of whom didn’t bond with them or understand their temperaments because they didn’t have their genes.
" Being religious and good is easy, being religious and just is way more difficult"
That makes no sense ?
I can't think of anything worse than losing a child. This shouldn't have happened. So sorry for the mothers and the children
Lies again? Abortion Is Murder USD SGD
Good to see this being reported. Unmarried mothers are QUALIFIED to raise kids! They can do it and the society should help them. In China there are also many this kind of stories. I hope one day some people will care.
But then the children may not have a father in their lives.
@@bossendenwoodconvict You don't necessarily need a mother or father although it is better, what you need is an adult with a brain and a good heart to raise a child, that's what matters the most. Some people have two parents but doesn't mean they're good parents
@@undeuxtrois123 Unfortunately, that's not the Chinese mentality! Step parents mistreat their kids a lot. Nobody in the community cares. It's not the case in the UK as I am British Chinese.
Mad when some of the most damaged kids are from married parents...the government is liable for this terrible injustice
Heartbreaking. I was pregnant at 17 and unmarried. I have two daughters who I love deeply and I’ve been completely devoted to them since the moment I found out I was pregnant. They’re 10 and 8 now and we are a close family with my husband included.
I can’t imagine having to give up my own baby I can’t begin to comprehend that kind of agony and torture...
Do u mind your children sleeping around?
Now seek penance dear
@@justdogood7413 Trollololol
@@justdogood7413 u are a pervert.
@@justdogood7413 Do you mind being a moron...?
As an adoptee this hurts my soul. We too never recovered. It’s called the primal wound. We don’t heal from the loss. We just get on with it. As did our mums.
For the dads who were not running away it was the same - they felt powerless as the pressure was applied to their loved one... being disconnected from their families meant they were vulnerable and felt they had no choice and yet were left with the double blame of both having been pregnant and 'giving up' their baby.
The most natural thing in the world for a woman.
Criminalised.
Commodified.
Denied.
Okay, okay. My grandmother was one of these babies, my biological great grandmother was from an aristocratic family who worked as a nurse during war time and she fell in love with a Canadian soldier who came to her hospital, who died later on (without her knowing) she became pregnant with my grandmother, she was kicked out of her family and forced to give up my grandmother so she decided to go to Canada in search of her lover, only to discover he had died. My grandmother was adopted by a couple, the husband’s legs had been blown off in the war and he was unable to have kids so they were offered my grandmother (they didn’t really want children but they were a respected couple and he was a war hero). My grandmother was raised by this couple but she didn’t have a good time and didn’t get on great with her adoptive parents. Fast forward years later and my grandmother finally meets her birth mother and apparently they clicked immediately. My great grandmother found love again whilst she was in Canada and got married and had children (she actually married a famous horse trainer - look up the Canadian Bengal lancers)
sorry this is so long but I was excited to share my great grandmothers story!
Crap like this always comes out eventually. I was separated from my children, and some day they will hear my experiences. "It was so wrong."
Just heartbreaking 😢 how they could possibly imagine that these mothers would forget their own children and just move on as if nothing had happened? So much damage over such a long period of time.
These unwed mothers are right. Pregnancy out of wedlock was devastating.
Yes wen your a teenager !
Yes the social worker ? Said something to me and i believe them true . Coercion true! But this in New Zealand. Private hospitals. So my son was adopted 1977. Never saw him again! Cried all the time heartbreaking. I so understand. 😪😪😪💚💚❤❤💛💛
Dam strait theses ladys need an apology. It's the lease they deserve. But also the children deserve an apology aswell. First one needs to come from the church. Heart breaking and angering.
Earn $300 - $80,000 daily.
Ask how?
What I find intense in this film that all the mothers want to cry but have learned to keep their grief to themselves. So sad 😢
A database of DNA testing could be used to determine which mom and child belong together!
Ancestry do I believe and 23&me although I think Ancestry is better at matching you with people with the same dna. People have to be in that system though
@@rosewest5168 that could be a solution to this injustice and pain. Thank you 🕊
@@XpurlXIt was not a solution for my mother and me. Some of these mothers loved their babies but stuff the grief down so far that they can’t face it coming up again. So they refuse to reunite. My grandmother told me this was why my mother couldn’t meet me. My birthdad told me she had wanted to marry and be a family with him and me and that he got scared and abandoned us. No AncestryDNA can repair the grief she has. There are others like her. And if they go to a therapist, the therapist tells them not to let it rule their life and that they’ve done a good job functioning and why stop now. The proper thing would be to see and acknowledge their grief and loss and give them permission to let the grief out.
One such mother, in the book “The Girls Who Went Away” (to maternity homes) said, “I turned my heart to stone.”
It isn’t such a simple thing to just match them up and they will reunite. Mine rejected reunion for 29 years and then died.
High time this story was told and a rightful apology issued. These women and their children made up the post-war Britain and no doubt this form of social injustice and unfair classist cruelty gave birth to many dysfunctional families and relationships and countless further generations impacted from these brutal separations. Let’s collectively make an effort to move towards healing these deep wounds. ❤️
Technically the babies didn't have a father but no one has a right to tell a mother who gave birth to her own baby to give it to someone else.
God...this is terrible. Truly heartbreaking.
We must fight as women to get justice for those poor mothers . I can’t imagine what it feels like being a mother of 3 daughters. I can only cry it’s just evil. Women we always suffer even today .
How could you stole a child to a mother? That's a barbarian behavior.
This makes me feel like hospitals are like jail
Earn $300 - $80,000 daily.
Ask how?
Get married sweety
@@justdogood7413 lol!
@@justdogood7413 no
Not only does it cause a lifetime of grief for the mothers, but also for the babies. Adopted children don't grow up normally.
Excuse me, are you adopted? I was blessed with two deeply loving adopted parents who have dedicated their lives towards giving me the best life possible, something I will be eternally grateful for. I grew up knowing that I was adopted, I don't even recall the first time I was told. How do you think I would have felt being told that it was not 'normal' ?? As for uniting children with their birth mothers, consider how painful that might be for all parties involved, non of whom are at fault.
@@emmacampbell9640 Yes, I am an adoptee, I have talked with dozens and dozens of other adoptees, and I have also read numerous books and listened to talks on the topic. Have you?
@@nonayobiznez5311 Of course I have, and I'm truly sorry if you've had a difficult childhood as I understand that this can impact the rest of your life. But we all have individual experiences and most adoptees I know have had positive ones and would also take offence at such a negative statement.
@@emmacampbell9640 I don't mean offense. I mean that adoption is not the normal situation. Normally, babies stay with their mothers. It is harmful to the baby to take her from her mother. This is just a fact; it traumatizes the baby. That is why adopted children don't grow up the same as kept children. If we have bad adoptive parents then it's even worse for us. See Nancy Newton Verrier's The Primal Wound.
@@nonayobiznez5311 While I agree that adoption is not ‘natural’, I actually found Nancy’s theories to be extremely subjective, based on her own troubled experiences which she categorically portrayed as fact. Where is the actual supporting evidence?? My ‘real’ mother was the woman who gave me all her love and raised me to go out into the world and be my best self, and now helps bring up my own child. No it’s wasn’t perfect but what is? Issues of trust and abandonment are entirely founded in adoptees but they are not exclusive to adoptees either. I would recommend “The Connected Child” for a far more rounded and positive perspective on adoption.
As a mother of 5 children, who had her first at 18 (I'm now 29) and out of wedlock, my heart absolutely breaks for these women, I honestly can not imagine the pain and suffering they went through. How cruel and inhumane. I'm so sorry you all went through that, you would of been amazing mother's to those babies💜
Shameful... May God Bless all the mothers who suffered through this...
Heartbreaking. How many lives ruined. These poor women lost much more than their babies. How many children even though adopted and hopefully into loving families grew up thinking someone gave them up. Someone didn't want them.
Horrible situation to experience. Absolutely heartbreaking.
It's heartbreaking. Forced to give birth without pain relief.
However, back then, could a 16 year old keep their baby if their family had disowned them? Was there the housing and benefits?
But it was cruel beyond words, stealing these babies, and the lifetime of pain caused.
Back then Government and Society were not ready to address the issues. It was one of the very dark page of history.
@@marierocher4422 ,This was a grave sin on the part of the women and the men too involved but should have been treated with forgiveness and kindness.
Yes how would they look after the child if they did not have the means.
So this was good for the child.
If some had the means and few would have those days it would have been best the mother keeps her child. Also what happened to the father ? He should have been also punished. What a man ! No love, responsibility for his own child. Just run away and possibly impregnate another ?
Jesus have mercy on me a sinner.
@UC6QvOoopxW-LWpX5P96yhYQ I am glad we live in more humane times. The pain caused is incredible.
I had a strange experience once that affected how I see blood relations. As a young woman I had gone to a student theatre to see a young friend , a student actor, perform some Shakespeare.
I sat in the auditorium, in the pitch dark and it was crowded. I began to feel a burning, tingling sensation in one side of my body and it got stronger and stronger until I was worried I was having a stroke or had MS.
In the intermission the lights went up and I turned my head. My own grandmother was sitting next to me! On the side that was tingling. We both jumped out our skin in surprise.
She was a local politician and had gone to support young actors. These bonds must be unconscious as well as very strong and I am sorry for all you have endured.
@@jdosvd family shame and reputation played a part I expect. For many girls, all they had was their family, and their family had decided to bury the problem forever with an adoption, so their reputation wasn't affected.
These girls must have felt so scared, so cornered. Luckily, in the UK,most families are compassionate if a girl gets pregnant,and do their best to raise the baby within the family, or if not, there is council housing, benefits and extra support for the young mother.
And yes, men are equally accountable for this and if they are older than the girl, if she is very young, they are fully responsible for what happened but they get away with it.
@@jdosvd so many reasons. Britain or many in the world were conservatives then where unwanted pregnancy were an embarrassment to the Society. These forced families to hide or part of family secrets due to peer or Society pressure. Teens issues were not focused nor the responsibility if something happen. No Access to Information, Sex Education, Contraceptions, Absence of Govt. dept. to address these issues, not provided psychological evaluation before and after adoption and most of all Separation of Church and State. Interference of churches when society is changing.
Then Teens (male and females) responsibilities if pregnancy happen. Yes fathers run away because it’s the Society push them to do so aside from those irresponsible people.
Sad for those who were responsible in those days...
My heart goes out for all those MOTHER'S.❣💕💞❤. HOPE ONE DAY SOME OF YOU WILL REUNIONS.
I'm so sorry to all these moms.. good bless you all.
Forced adoption doesn’t guarantee a secure and safe environment for the stolen child.
Utterly heartbreaking. These mothers and their children do deserve an apology.
My first child is due in 4 weeks time. I’ll never allow anyone to take him away from me, even it means to cost my life. Can’t imagine what those mums went through. Wish them find their kids and amend relationships.
Was it out of wedlock?😱
Congrats and God bless ❤️
@@justdogood7413 yes I’m not legally married to my partner yet. That doesn’t change our love to our baby.
@Topal yes I’m sure no mothers willing to let go their baby unless there’s no choice. Feeling very sympathetic to them.
@@annvarghese8913 thanks Ann.
I think if my ex knew that he was actually loved by his mum even though he was adopted maybe my life and that of my child would have been different and much better. The aftermaths of these consequences are still being passed to the next generation and the next.
I was born in Soviet Estonia. We had many horrors, but nothing like THIS. Even before the Soviet Union, when religion was a thing, our society did not shun unmarried mothers. The church shamed them, the neighbours were gossiping, and single mothers were often very poor, but that was it - nobody was taking the babies from their mothers. This is like a horror film.
I’m torn over this one, I think marriage should be the cornerstone of the British family once again because it’s better for children to be raised in a loving family with a mother and father but ripping children from their mothers because they’re born out of wedlock is also wrong and destructive.
True. Marriage is the right and sensible approach which ought to be encouraged. Otherwise, society will crumble and destroy itself.
Alexander: I agree with you about marriage and families.. I grew up in a two parent family. I am deeply grateful for the support from my parents and the happy memories. You only have one childhood and I am grateful my Dad was in it.
Nothing can fill the father-sized hole in a child's life, which so many children are experiencing today as a result of the benefits system allowing it ( by subsidising single motherhood.)
On the other hand it's a shame that the separations of children and unmarried mothers had to be so final.
I have a friend who had a child while unmarried. For various reasons, she can't take care of a child and can only just about take care of herself, so her daughter is being brought up by her parents. She still see's the child every weekend though, and the child knows her as her mother.
Yeah this happened on the NHS, 16,000 forced adoptions in one year alone.
What a devastating video.....there should be unsealing of all documents and reunions should be encouraged. Such a tragedy....
If both parties want to reunite, yes. But you don't what old wounds could be reopened.
@@reachandler3655 you're right, but those that want to know should at least be told their baby is alive & well...that at least would help these mothers know their babies are ok
@@miamidolphinsfan Yes, I agree.
To have them apologize now means nothing. They weren’t the ones who did that to them. So even if they apologize it is meaningless.
I agree with you totally. I was put in a mother and baby home in 1969. I refused to bottle feed (you were told not to breast feed). After the birth we single mums were coerced to give our babies up. I refused to even go there and was force fed Valium and locked up in the attic away from the other mothers. I was allowed out for a shower under supervision. This was a Church of England home in London. It’s a complicated story I won’t go into here, as to how I fought to keep my baby, but eventually I caved in. But overall, an apology either verbal or written, does nothing to take away the pain and loss. I did eventually marry and had three children - and they are beautiful and amazing - but the one I lost can never be returned.
Agreed. What I want is the right to revoke or annul the adoption order placed on me owing to coercion and abuse of my mother.
This makes my blood boil. How dare they tamper with nature and inflict this primal wound. The ripple effects are still impacting on our family 44 years later!
Then they should stop sleeping around. That's selfish. Fornication should never be encouraged. It's the child who suffers. Why discourage marriage? Why deprive children of a mom and dad? That's abuse. Stop it! Sheesh! What's wrong with some people? If you really love to have children and want a stable and loving family, get married!
@@justdogood7413you sound privileged.
My poor mum had a son back then,and has passed away not knowing her son Wicked government ffs it's so wrong
this is cruel . it made me cry.I am a mum and I still can t imagine how theses mums could and can feel! inhuman. it s religion again...
I had a good experience in the 60s with the service. I was happy in my foster home. It was when I went home my life fell apart, there was that much poverty. I had to bring myself up at the age of 12. At 16 I worked and looked after myself until I got married at 20. it was a fight for survival as a child. I was determined my children wouldn't have the same happen to them.
No one should be forced to give up their children.
why they re adopted Their child
I strongly agree against their will.
Devastating 🙏💔😭
@Lukewarm Water this wicked world is the Devils Domain.
The ONLY reason that we take this treacherous trek 🥾 is to determine eternal destiny.
Heaven is real. Hell is real. Jesus is the only way to Heaven...
i pray that you are given eyes to see and ears to hear while you still have time and opportunity
Ephesians 1:17-19
King James Version
17 That the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give unto you the spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of him:
18 The eyes of your understanding being enlightened; that ye may know what is the hope of his calling, and what the riches of the glory of his inheritance in the saints,
19 And what is the exceeding greatness of his power to us-ward who believe, according to the working of his mighty power,
Earn $300 - $80,000 daily.
Ask how?
many young single Mothers were bullied into giving up their children especially if the Mums already had a child that was looked down on , The London Social services were hard people, Many of those children were packed off to Australia and Canada, many were taken abroad by the Adoptive Parents so they lost their own identity,
Government to this day has still not apologised for removing children to Australia without parents knowing. Children are a commodity today it's a legal way of trafficking children through social services, courts while the families suffer . These establishments are not fit for purpose. Just look at grooming gangs
I read about all this in PHILOMENA by Martin Sixmith for the first time. Can’t believe how brutal humans can be. 💔💔 If you can’t read the book, please watch the movie, it stars Judie Dench.
"Forced"? Ha. What a bunch of utter losers, handing over their children. Utter criminals. They should be in prison, for life, for that crime.
@@guff9567 thank you so much for your well thought out and compassionate response to a situation in time that you obviously have no idea about.
@@guff9567 So, tell us, have you always been a soulless craphound, or is it a more recent thing?
Then they should stop sleeping around. That's selfish. Fornication should never be encouraged. It's the child who suffers. Why discourage marriage? Why deprive children of a mom and dad? That's abuse. Stop it! Sheesh! What's wrong with some people? If you really love to have children and want a stable and loving family, get married!
It’s not human nature. Humans are naturally compassionate. it’s the result of indoctrination
So sad to see old woman breaking down on live TV :((
A lifetime of trauma 😞 so sad.
As an Adoptee of that time (1950's) all I want is the eased legal right to Revoke the Adoptee status and return legally to my DNA given birth status (with no claims on any other party) . The UK Gov'ts have persisted in treating us as though we can never return to out DNA and birth given rights and identity especially if our Adoptions were child abusive . Mine was and so many other Adoptees I know attest to that too ..
Oh this is just so very sad what an awful injustice was put on these young women ,the Government should act and give all these Brave Women an Official Apology .
Earn $300 - $80,000 daily.
Ask how?
Then they should stop sleeping around. That's selfish, cruel, sad and unjust. Fornication should never be encouraged. It's the child who suffers. Why discourage marriage? Why deprive children of a mom and dad? That's abuse. Stop it! Sheesh! What's wrong with some people? If you really love to have children and want a stable and loving family, get married!
It was still very cruel ,and it happened to thousands of young girls ,stop being so Judgemental .
Wake up and live in the real world ,Not everything is black + white .
@@sumiles7881 Do NOT FEED THE TROLL ;-)
My grandmother was born while my great grandmother was unmarried. It was kind of taboo back then, but there were shelters for unmarried women and their babies, and thats where they lived for the first 3 years. After that they moved to great great grandmas house and thats where my grandma grew up. I always felt sorry for my grandma but hearing in other countries unmarried women were expected to give away their babies is really horrible💔😞
Wow, I hope those mother's get reunited with their birth mother's. There is a book titled the journey from abandondment to healing. Maybe it will help some of these women.
Earn $300 - $80,000 daily.
Ask how?
@@tekenaojoka9873 go away... not the place
Charity. Thank you, this book may work for other’s too; all children in single parent families who may have been separated from Birth Parent young [for a Plethora of Reasons]; Injustices and Unresolved Hurt has a Lasting Effect. Thank you for recommending the 📖. Have a beautiful day 🤍🏴
Why do people dislike all such videos?😫😥
My heart is breaking. This is the most cruel act. The bond between a mother and her baby is so strong.
It wasn't only unmarried women who were being forced to give up their newborn for adoption. It was married women who needed to recover from complications during child birth whose head of their family was unemployed at the time too. It was married women married to men with disabilities who were making only minimum wage at the time before paid maternity leave was instituted here in
Canada who had family background without connections too.
It's the most horrific 😭 thing done to young mothers. I was one of them here is Australia. U never forget. It destroys your soul. I haven't had any other children either. I found my son 26 years ago. He had a good upbringing but still has been deeply affected by adoption. Life is never really the same for either of us. We did finally get our apology here in Australia. Hope United Kingdom gets 🙏 a proper apology 💔😥
It's terrible.. Once more made sure how rough the 20th century was...
Its happened to me in 2015, 2017 & theyre trying to again this year. This isnt an old thing it still happens.
@@AliceSykesFromWalkerland In Britain?
The pain never ever stops.
Injustice with mother , apology can not heal.
Unfortunately it was common practice back then. It was almost impossible to raise a child without your parents support which was not always given.
The dark underside of Britain.
Didn't just happen to British women. This happened in Australia too. Very sad.
A mother never stops loving her children regardless of the circumstances I hope my children know that I’ll never be truly gone because I am a part of them and their past and they are a part of me as they are my legacy.
What a terrible situation these women were in. They deserve every apology and redress for the wrongs they have suffered.
This happened to me in 2015 with my daughter (I was 21), then again in 2017 with my son & now theyre trying to take my daughter due next month, I am fighting it again but dont think ill win as im against the government alone. Im glad this is finally being talked about. It has destroyed many many lives & we are forced to just suffer in silence, the courts and social workers need to be held accountable for what theyve done.
@Lukewarm Water you know more about her situation than the rest of us? If not, maybe shut up and not give away how much of a sociopath you really are?
@Lukewarm Water You are assuming a lot for a person who knows nothing about the other.
@Lukewarm Water you're the one to talk about judging.
Get on birth control
@@nakedshadows Eat shit.
By other hand, single motherhood is actually bad for children
This reminds me of the atrocities done to Irish women and children by the church at the same time. There also the government is not making any haste with the investigations. I wonder in how many other countries something similar will come to light.
And still happening till this day
Earn $300 - $80,000 daily.
Ask how?
Then they should stop sleeping around. That's selfish. Fornication should never be encouraged. It's the child who suffers. Why discourage marriage? Why deprive children of a mom and dad? That's abuse. Stop it! Sheesh! What's wrong with some people? If you really love to have children and want a stable and loving family, get married!
Very moving and upset matter. I really hope that the broken hearts of mothers and babies adopted in this manner can find some comfort in the knowledge and exposure of the true, because apologies cannot make things go well after all these years that have passed. God bless you all!
It would interesting to know if any money changed hands in these adoptions. I've read instances of 'donations' being made when 'religion' was involved. Clearly in some cases the adoptive parents werent parents at all. The cruelity was beyond measure, when a young woman needed compassion and support. The babies of these yoing woman often ran into problems with mental health issues later in life.
The primal wound theory holds that “severing the connection between the infant and biological mother [through adoption] causes a primal wound which often manifests in a sense of loss (depression), basic mistrust (anxiety), emotional and/or behavioral problems and difficulties in relationships with significant others… affect[ing] the adoptee’s sense of self, self-esteem and self-worth throughout life.
This is truly heartbreaking, clearly inhumane treatment and all the victims most deserving of an apology from the highest in the land.
The same behaviors was also in British colonies that had British customs.
While there was not forced adoption, there was heavy ridicule and verbal and other types of abuse against women by their families and others in the community.
There is pain for everyone. Adopted parents were shunned for either not being able to create families or being labelled baby snatchers or being told to pretend that the children were theirs....the children? Pulled apart like a ragdoll by the birth mother because of ownership issues and finally, single mothers today have not gained any progress from the government. The children's act 1989 doesn't consider child abuse nor does it provide any protection to mothers from being denied child maintenance through the DWP. Women are still being denied support. We have made zero progress!!!!
Religion has a lot to answer for....
Why are you dragging religion? Come on??
I don't think it has anything to do with religion. Many species and particularly primates like humans don't have offspring outside a stable relationship because a male and female working as a team produce better outcomes for their progeny.
The church hide the true for years....
Religion isn't a person, it's a collection of people. People imposed this using the excuse of religion, not the other way around.
@Joe Xavier LMAO religion teaches to not destroy life???? Wow, you've obviously never read a religious text and know absolutely nothing about history. "Kill the men. Smash the babies heads against the rocks Take the women as slaves." "Stone the pregnant woman (let's just ignore that that clearly means "murdering" the fetus.) As if the inquisition and all the settler colonialism and genocides never happened. Stfu you ignorant cow.
Like in the case of the Mother's and babies of Tuam...WHERE ARE THE MEN WHO FATHERED THESE CHILDREN!!!?
Thats why I find it difficult to be a social worker when it comes to that part of taking people children except those who are on risky, I don't know if some social worker don't suffer guilty.
Isn't that terrible, here in Montreal I knew a lady who was all for giving moms welfare because, on Xmas day, she'd go to the orphanages and hold babies because they were simply never held enough!
I gave myson to my sister and later had 5more...I still haven't gotten over it...I was 17
Oh damn I never knew this happened
Back in the day,it was considered a sin to be an unmarried mother...thank goodness times have changed.
@@BondJFK and all over the commonwealth.