How to Be a Good Ally - Identity, Privilege, Resistance | Ahsante Bean | Ahsante the Artist
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- Опубликовано: 3 окт 2024
- Allyship is an active process - as a Black queer asexual cis able-bodied woman in the lgbt+ community, here's my (intersectionality inclusive) take on how to be a better ally
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How to be a good ally? It's about actively being inclusive of diversity across the spectrum - from lgbt+ folks, black and brown folks, disabled and neurodiverse folks, and people from other marginalized groups. It's also important to think of the intersectionality of people in various marginalized identities like the experiences of black women or trans people of color. We're all problematic in our own ways. But in these are a few ways that we can work to unlearn our natural prejudice, recognize our privilege, and work to make the world more equitable in spite of them.
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Hey! I'm Ahsante the Artist :) I make vlogs and short films about culture, social issues and justice, Harvard college, how to adult as a post grad, and what's going on with me. I strive to live spiritedly and think creatively. I hope you join me!
Considering all that's going on right now, I really appreciate all these tips. I want to do the right thing and help as much as I can, and this video gives a lot of good advice on how to start. Thank you so much!
dont mind me, just taking notes on how to be a better ally 📝 thank you for this!
That's a GREAT explanation of safe spaces.
I'd also say a good tip is to get over yourself? Because you're probably gonna mess up here & there by accident and you may feel shitty about it. But you kinda just gotta keep going and push forward and get over your mini-crisis and just do better because marginalized people don't exist to make you feel better when you make mistakes.
Also: That ginger from In A Heartbeat is me??Where is my money.
👍👍👍
Atleast someone said somthing god bless ya
Or just don't have a goddamn mini-crisis in the first place.
A-FUCKIN-MEN!!!
Lol this something I had to learn and sometimes mess up on. You’ll cause more harm obsessing over your mini crisis, to yourself and others
This really helped with me, I’m slowly learning my way out of the “Micheal Scott Phase” pretty much all people who have some sort of privilege (for me: White, Able-Bodied, Neurotypical) and this really got me on a good path. Thank you!
Thought you would like to know that this was in my syllabus for a social work graduate course. Do you have Venmo?
Oh wow! That's so cool to know ☺️ You can leave me a tip here if you'd like! www.buymeacoffee.com/ahsanteb
So following on from Ahsante’s point 5 of ‘doing the work’, another way as a minor that you can put work in is to call out your school or institution on what they could do better. Do they do anything/enough for Pride Month and Black History Month? Do they support diversity? Do they have a multi faith prayer room? Are they physically and institutionally accessible for everyone? Do they have any gender neutral bathrooms, and bathrooms that everyone can use? Do they do anything to properly and sensitively educate on different faiths, cultures, and social issues? Do they have safe spaces, and a counsellor or independent listener who can be trusted? There is always more that can be done, and a place of education has a responsibility to do just that- educate.
Very good point! Glad this resonated with you!
Wonderful video Ahsante! I know i could do more to be a better ally and I love how this video gave such great action points. Especially loved the analogy at the beginning!
Thank you for this. I'm trying hard to be an ally. I am a disabled bilsexual so I understand ablism and discrimination . I never understood racism but I'm trying to live my life in love instead of hate. I'm going to the underground railroad tour with my friend and taking my son so we can be better allies.
Hi Ahsante, thank you so much for this video. I'm a pretty ignorant person, trying to learn how to navigate politics without falling off the deep end on the left, or being taken in by centrism or conservativism where they would be happy to ignore serious issues because they aren't easy. This video really helps me see how to be a lot more sophisticated and respectful in my approach, so thank you from me, and also you've done a good thing for all the people I would be bothering right now with my stupid questions.
I really like the idea that we're all problematic. There are so many groups with their unique problems and each person inside each group is unique. I think we really should increase our empathy and inclusiveness in general and learn about all sorts of people and try to understand each other.
I love your description of safe spaces of being like going 'home' and 'not having to play defence', best way I've ever heard it explained. Great video, I know who my latest subscription is!
That "Safe spaces" theory was revolutionary, and it saved me from so many past heartbreaks when interacting with marginalized communities online. There might be things that I might find outright offensive according to all sorts of logic, but sometimes, i guess we just have to let things and people be. I'm still working on my boundaries, and there have been times when conversations got messy even when both parties were at their best intentions. Being a new ally is emotionally challenging, thoroughly uncomfortable, maybe even draining sometimes. It just gives me a sense of fulfillment and even strengthens my boundaries. even though I've been bullied by some members of marginalized communities, I'm not gonna stop for what I believe in.
We're trying our best!
Love your reminders that being an Allie is part of social action!!!!
I was watching a video made by tee noir and she recommended this video and I’m really happy I watched it. It was a very informative video and you made so many great points.
Not only is this an excellent video, but also major kudos for doing as you preach and mention a variety if marginalised groups and thus making this video amazingly inclusive. Yay!
Yay inclusivity! Thanks!!
this video has really helped me to be a better ally! thank you :)
Yay! Glad I could help!
I'm a queer person and see the word "ally" being used inaccurately all the time. Observing this makes me very aware of the fact that I need to get educated when it comes to being an ally to people of color and other marginalized groups.
Like male and lesbian femanists? Useing it just to get laid? Lol shit cover tho
JJ souls Has it ever occurred to you that maybe this person is simply trying to educate themselves?
@@ookreek5374 trust me thats not whats going on
@@jjsouls6986 then wtf is going on
JJ souls Please don’t make assumptions about others.
I just “found” your channel and I am so glad I did! I am an ally and the information and advice you offer is so welcomed.
My problem right now is that the research is so confusing. Seems like nobody is on the same page so I'm left not always knowing what to do/say.
Thank you so much for this, and have an amazing 2021!
Thank you for this!
(It definitely helped me realize how I could be better and start becoming someone who better/supports minorities. Thank you again!)
I know this video is a few years old, but it's just as relevant. This conversation about racial injustice is obviously expanding on the internet...and what are a lot of white people doing?? (I'm white btw and I've observed this on social media). White people are posting to look the part, and turning it off and not thinking about it after that. Not saying you should be up sweating at night with guilt, of course not (get over yourself lol...like the comment under me says). Listen to your black/gay/trans/immigrant/ any marginalized group of friends!! And if you don't have any...expose yourself to media like this that will educate you. I think some of us do not realize how much we speak without listening to others. Please listen to your friends and family members that you claim to be an ally to! Do not use your allyship on social media to boost your income/credibility/respectability. It's really making me sick how people who spend a lot of time posting about police brutality for example don't wanna have a real conversation about it or contribute to the solutions being proposed. Just post for likes. (This comment is definitely directed at fellow white people btw...or anyone claiming they're an ally of a group but not doing the work like Ashante said...)
I do have a question however, this video is super helpful (and this comment) but how can a minor do the work to be an ally? I come from a small town with not much options for protesting.
@@queer-ios3155 there are other ways than just protesting to help bring about change. a) you could call representatives if you live in USA, MPs for the UK and the equivalent elsewhere to find out their views and articulate your views and those of the communities you are trying to be an ally of to them. b) you can try and bring about institutional change. Ask your school or institution what they are doing, and suggest actions such as a more diverse range of speakers at events, doing more for Black History Month and Pride Month, asking them to create those safe spaces for others and to do more to educate their pupils on social issues. Do they have a multi faith prayer room, a bathroom that everyone could use, accessible ways into every building, a counsellor or independent listener who will actually listen? c) you can call out yourself and your friends. Educate yourself- read books, watch films, listen to podcasts, watch RUclips videos like this one- and once you have started to work on your own biases talk to your friends about theirs, and what they are doing about them. Campaign on social media and become part of organisations that make an effort to help, and stay up to date with what’s happening in the world. You can still make a difference and have those conversations, though as a minor they may be a little different depending on how old you are
@@febby_8622 thank you
This Helped So Much! Thank You❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
I appreciate this video and the fact that you're not speaking in a condescending matter.
I'm trying to make up for my past racial biases and mistakes for words I have said. I feel so much guilt and shame, but there's no use dwelling in it and not doing anything with it. I can't change the past, but I can change the present and the future. First off, I am so so sorry to the black community, I always called myself a black ally and then I said a word I wasn't allowed to say out of curiosity when I was alone and in my room. Even if it was said out of curiosity, without racist intention, and not to anyone directly, it was still wrong of me. It was ignorant and wrong and I should never have said that. I take full responsibility for it. Instead of feeling shame and guilt and doing nothing, I am now doing and trying my best to make up for it and ACTUALLY doing something about the racism in this world. I will always be an ally and always be improving from then on. Thank you all for reading and just listening to this apology. I hope this little story motivates other privileged people to improve. I realize my white priledge and working on making every POC's life around me better with what I can do. And I've been doing that as hard as I can for a long time and I'll never stop.
If anyone needs to vent to me, I am here. I am all ears.
Thank you all for listening
this video NEEDS to be watched.
Wow, that was a great piece, very informative. I have been an ally for years before there was a code of conduct put on it, and in other area's (as you hit on many), I have learning to do. I really appreciated the factual information, well done, and I think anyone would be willing to help support your mission. I am going to save this and show it to my students, and use it in different lessons.
So glad you find it to be a good resource!
I feel sorry for people that live with this mindset.
Thank you sm, because of this I've learned a lot.
I was always terrified of being racist because I wanted to be a good person. As a result, this made me ignorant and neutral when it actually came to taking steps towards being an actual ally. Recently I've been trying to do better by researching and listening to creators of colour. What I am currently taking away from the experience is that I just need to accept the fact that I will mess up, get called out, and will have to fix my behavior/thought process. I feel like it all boils down to humility and the ability to listen. If anybody else has any tips or recommendations, please do tell me! I'm always willing to learn more! ^^
One thing people can do is proactively give more engagement to marginalized creators. Leave a comment (Even if it's just 'great video'), liking the content, watching the ads, sharing, retweeting, tagging, that type of stuff. Also being aware of resources to link people to like connecting Black business owners to Miiriya, a hub for buying Black.
Shout out to Tee Noir for recommending this video!
3:07: me, the bisexual at the table with the auntie: jaklsd
This was so amazing and informational, thank you so much!
Awesome! Thank you for watching!
I wish my relatives listened to me😂 but I really loved this video, lots of respect. As a gay guy I really appreciate you and people like you bringing attention to minorities and you made a lot of good points. I hope a lot of people see this video, i"ll be sharing it. 😊
This is an amazing, eloquent, clear concise and funny video! Thank you sis!
how could someone call their boss out for example for saying something bigoted? I want to help in those situations but I’m scared of getting reprimanded for it :(
*I call out people in my social circles or people in my family, but with the power imbalance I find myself apprehensive to do so even though I know it’s important for me to speak up about it then too
@@ashleyhernandez845 Maybe you could try to pay attention how those people reacted to other criticism etc, or bring it up carefully? And if it goes somewhat well you can be a little more direct.
That's really a difficult situation, but that's the best I can think of.
@@wowanothercookie will do, thank you!!
Great info thank you for posting and educating us🙏
thank you so much for the explanation !! I’m bi and genderfluid but i don’t know how to deal with my family ALWAYS using racial, homophobic slurs 😓 I told them countless times that it’s wrong to say that and that they should respect other people but they just don’t listen, especially my father, makes my blood boil !!!!!
This is a really great video on allyship and I appreciate it.
thank you so much for this video!!
Thank you for making this video!!
Thanks for the video!
brilliant. loved this.
People really need to speak up if they aren't apart of the community. I live in a very homophobic area and when people are saying outwardly homophobic and transphobic things I fear speaking up because if people knew that I was LGBTQ+ I could be hurt. So I sat there while people were discussing how gross they think people like me are, I just wished that someone would say something, anything because I couldn't. Please stand up against people who are oppressing others, even when someone from that community isn't there. If they act like that with you imagine how they act when near someone from that community.
At 4:30 you said that "as an ALLY you'll be fine with that fact that this is not about you" but sometimes it is about them. Always room to grow and learn. Thank you for taking to time and energy to post this. Very much appreciated
"an active process that you're always working on"
I cryed watching in a heartbeat, It was was so cute...... I cry at cute things
i loved this! thank u so much
Can you do one that’s for specifically for social media pls. Some people don’t have the money to support financially or for one reason or another can’t physically show up in person to help .
I made a very tone deaf decision to explain how I was problematic on a video that was not for me to speak on. Do not do what I did because nobody is here to validate you as a "non-problematic" person. I really wouldn't like it if someone randomly was like "yeah...I really was islamophobic can you believe it" as a way to seek ratification . Please be mindful because there is a huge difference between taking accountability and seeking validation.
Constantly learning. Yes, yes, yes! SHOW UP as an ally!
Thank you!!
What kind of spaces ARE safe spaces?
Microwaves. Dungeons. The vacuum of space
I will be watching for your art
YES THANK YOU ❤❤❤❤
(Just some self-reflection here lol)
At the moment, I'm trying to educate myself as both an advocate for mental health challenges and an ally to people on the autism spectrum. I'm trying to figure out how to be kinder and more aware of other people's experiences everyday and create platforms for people to speak on their own experiences, rather than insert my own. I've been given more opportunities for someone female (white) and my age in my rural area already, but I often feel I don't know enough about everyone's experience to speak for a larger group and need to create spaces for others.
I also think that perhaps when intervening as an ally it might be good to remember there are different ways to intervene that are safe depending on the situation. The steps generally outlined to me in sexual assault first responders interventions might also prove useful depending on the nature of the situation an ally finds themself in (thinking of potentially violent or aggressive altercations specifically, not conversational instances of racism/sexism/ableism in this case)- firstly, are you at risk of harm approaching yourself? Can you find a reason to separate the victim from the situation? Do you have friends/colleagues nearby that can assist you? One thing we learn in med school is how to motivationally interview, and to be aware that at a pre-contemplation stage individuals might react with aggression or not be open to the possibility of making changes. (But, we also recently learn that asking these questions about smoking, alcohol use etc, in a small intervention overall will push some of these pre-contemplative people over the line to contemplation, overall it confers benefit to still undertake it). I wonder how we can frame the conversation in a way that diffuses the conversation and informs change. In my mentoring work we've been focusing a lot on the power that questions can have, and I still honestly have no idea how to ask the right questions, but I guess that comes with practice. I have a tendency to be loud and often forget to validate + explore the concerns of individuals who express casual bigotry to me, and need to learn more about how to respond or what materials I can refer to in response. While I think this response is somewhat reasonable, it doesn't help to educate or advocate, especially when I'm not in a position of danger myself.
Also, with regard to advocacy for systemic problems in my local, state and national agendas, I wonder what the best way to raise awareness is. Just mentioning marginalised groups is a start, but hearing their voices and elevating them to policy at these levels is probably more important. Also I need to learn how to organically and non-confrontationally start discussions about issues I'm passionate about. One of my colleagues focuses on highlighting positive achievements toward change and I think that might be something I need to do more. Got a lot to learn lol
I would also encourage folks to bring up uncomfortable topics more often with friends who may even be on your side. Speak up about a form of art you thought was racist or homophobic in some shape way or form, and talk about it, for example. We can only progress as a society if we have these uncomfortable conversations that we could just easily avoid.
thank you for this. You're here doing important work. Thank you for answering questions you've probably gotten a million times patiently and kindy, its not something that you have to do but it will hopefully be changing a lot of lives as people share this video and listen to its message, appreciate your emotional labor and the work that you're doing!! Always trying to learn and be better, hopefully this makes more people do the same
Love this video thank you!
This is generally OK but it is rather too academic. The best way of learning is to have conversations with people . Friendship is the best way of creating fruitful ways of learning and you should consider that you might be looking towards having a mutual ally situation - why should it be a one way process?
Definitions stop being so useful at a point. Great points! Just what I was looking for. Haha - I accept consulting is not a job in my generation.
Jesus thanks for the like bi-phobic auntie bit cause I was confused about weather correcting or calling out family members for shit like that would even help
Is there a transcription of this video?
Your video is excellent - the content, as well as the delivery. Rather than write a long message on a women's platform here in Switzerland, I am going to request people to watch your video. Thank you, thank you!!!
great video!!
Great video! This is very helpful. It's important for people to do the research and help others they know experience being who they are. I think it's something to be aware of other people's experiences of being lgbtq. I have learned so much by going to events, seminars, and conversations with my friends to have a better understanding. I enjoyed this video. Keep up the amazing work!!!
how do you do your hair it is so good
5:18 you’re right this doesn’t make you an ally it makes you a decent person
thank you for your voice!!! this video taught me so much and i thank you for that ❤️🤩
Or you could just believe in liberalism and liberal causes. Everyone should be equal in a movement.
I tend towards not believing what people say on the face of it, but I firmly hold that all words come from somewhere and it's important to understand from where those words and actions come, and there are many people who understand those roots better than myself, so i listen to as many people as possible, doing my best to understand the roots of actions of as many people as possible, be they marginalized or majority, but particularly marginalized, since those conversations tend to be much more sparse and require much more thought and empathy.
Problem is, i have near no resources and my own life isn't allowing me to both live for myself, and live for others, so i've always been a rather shitty ally when it comes to devoting resources i may otherwise utilize myself for things what leisure time i still have or school, which has got to be
however, when it comes to actually engaging in conversations with other people when people in marginalized groups to which I don't belong (tho let's be honest, the ways in which I don't fit the "abled straight white cis male" archetype don't really matter considering most people assume i fit that archetype anyway). Get me in a small group and I do my best to use what i've learned by listening to the people that I have.
You say allyship isn't neutral and i totally agree, but i feel like some often confuse neutrality with the aspect of being an active middleman to facilitate the start of some of these conversations.
IDK this is just my experience. I'm not super active, though i don't really have the capacity to be. Hopefully in the future that will change. I'm betting my entire career on the idea that i'll be able to enact and facilitate real positive change, so we'll see.
What a great video! Thank you! Such great helpful information in one succinct clip.
Classic textbook example of institutionalized privilege would be a university professor flanked by police officers delivering a politics filled lecture , and the audience being too afraid of the consequences of not cheering to do anything but go over the top with performative obedience and try to outdo their neighbor with their enthusiasm while casting a eye over the crowd scanning for the less than enthusiastic cheers.
not sure if you are spiritual or not but if not then im refering to an empath not the word empathy, but coming from an empath, i can tell that you are so full of love and have an enourmous heart and this sense of genuineness that warmed my heart within literal seconds of the video, it has nothing to do with the content in the video, it is how i have the ability to pick up on certain energies in person or not ik it might sound crazy but thats not the pint the pint is that i can tell and feel that you are greatly unappriciated because of how beautiful of a person you are which can scare alot of people away because thier egos are alot more involved in thier personality and logic but yeah to sum it up i just wanted to say thank you for everything you do for so many around you and for being unapoligeticlly yourself because that combo is to rare these days and as well as this video having such an amzing impact in educating and making a difference to so many, thank you.:)
Thank you for a simple how to, and graciously saying “we’re all problematic in some way”. I mean, I’m trying, but I get stuff wrong, and then it’s hard to get back at it. But recognizing that you’re gonna mess up, and that doesn’t make you irredeemable helps.
If you are allying an individual it is important to listen to the person and understand what they consider support.
Also you should totally check this out, it's extremely illustrative of biases at work in society ncase.me/polygons/
Thanks so much
Had to explain to mom that men like her dad pick sons like him and that is y blm exists. That we are still in the same place. Its the remix of opression.
Over the past few years I have learned so much about my privilege. My family has people of differing gender identity and color and is really supportive of them, so I'm thankful that they have taught me well somewhat early about allyship. Even before I knew exactly what it was. I've also met so many different people in youth leadership with FCCLA. And more recently through RUclips communities like Road to Nerdfighteria project and Tuataria. Your point on it being action-oriented and not passive is so crucial. Learning, listening, and supportive and consistent action. It's not all about me. Thank you for sharing all these ways to use long-term!
Cheers luv
Thank you
Great video, very helpful tips. I think another action that allies can take is to be more civically engaged in their local politics. We always hear about the presidential election, but the policies of your governor, representative, and mayor matter just as much if not more. Research politicians involved in your city or town and try to figure out if they're helping or hurting marginalized communities. Some might say this is only important for Republicans, but Democrats, even if they say that have good intentions and plan to help these communities, are just as capable of promoting policies that hurt minorities. When it comes to research, don't just look at their rhetoric, look at their policies and the consequences they'll have because, at the end of the day, their actions have more impact than their words.
Watching this is 2023 thank you!
me, strapping in for an education
Also, I came here from tee noir's video :)
this is gold, thank you so much
Omg everyone on earth needs to watch this video. I still can't understand why people get butthurt about pride or history months just because it doesn't include them (usually white, cis). Keep up the great work Ahsante!!
I wish certain members of my family would have appreciated my speaking up about things. :'(
You have a nice name . You must be Ghanaian. God bless you .
Here for this!!!! So grateful I found your channel. Subbed, shared and looking forward to more.
commenting for algorithm!!!! amazing video
thank you so much for this video!
I agree! But is allyship a word?
Yes! Not sure if it's Webster-official, but it's pretty commonly used. Like friendship is being a friend, allyship is being an ally. Ah, the evolution of language
Thank you for your insights!! ❤️
I would suggest against telling people to google stuff. There's a solid chance that they'll find people like Candace Owens, Ben Shapiro, or Jordan Peterson instead of the people you want them to find.
Google finds answers, not necessarily the right answers.
can't have anyone finding the lanoitaR srekaepS of hturT, now, can we?
Thank you. Excellent resource. As a disabled person I noticed that right after mentioning disability being different for different people, you used an ableist phrase "walk through life." You and I may not both walk through life, but we both "go through life." Our church leadership, the Unitarian Universalist Association, had a schism because they were requested to change the language "we stand together."
This is the content I'm on youtube for!
What if people are lying? How is it possible to know if what they say is not bs without critically assessing what they are saying?
Thoughtful & Refreshing... Now, with that point of view covered; lets cover the inside positions (i.e. not everyone is ready to be supported).
🙉🙈🙊
Namaste.