I am married to a Korean man. My husband told me the story of what his mother had to endure when she first married his father. It was brutal; she went through tremendous stress. His mom went through a lot, so she promised her son that she would never treat her future daughter-in-law the way hers did. Long story short, my mother in law is the sweetest gentle person ever 🥰.
My mother in law is the same. I cried when I heard how the grandparents treated her after she married my father in law, I was horrified. She has always treated me so sweetly, I'm so thankful.
Yep. I am an American who had a German grandmother. She was very possessive of my father and straight up verbally abusive to my mother. Luckily my father moved hours away, but as a mental health professional in the US I've seen this quiet a bit across multiple ethnicities and cultures.
Ugh mama's boy's kill me. Mother in laws ruin more marriages than they know. You're son is not the only precious being in this world. Wives are someone's precious daughters too smh
Actually mama's boys ruin their mariages, because it doesn't matter how crazy the mother in law is, if the son is on the side of his wife and set boundaries between his mother and his closest family (wife & children), this kind of thing wouldn't happen. This happens because the son allows it to happen. He has the responsibility to deal with his crazy mother, not the daughter in law. Girls: Never ever get involved with mommy's boys. Korean mommy's boys: run away! Don't even look at them!
But it's also about the son. If one of his parents treats his love interest like sh*t why don't they say anything? I know being respectful and greatful towards your parents is a huge thing in Korea but at some point of mistreating you need to Man up. You don't even need to be disrespectful to stand up for your wife 🤷🏻
@Georgie13 My MIL has several grandchildren. To some, she has had some relationship especially when they were younger. For others, she really has no relationship.
Especially with the decline in kids right now. It's not even happening only there I mean like the mother-in-law thing I've only ever heard coming from South Korea that is something maybe uniquely there but I know Japan is having an issue with a decline in children and actually Tokyo just put out that in a decade it'll be too late they'll cross the threshold of hitting a no going back zone to the decline of the amount of people not having kids. And then even in the United States it's becoming an issue where people are just not having enough kids. They're either choosing their pets are plants to be children instead. But there's like so many reasons why this is happening. There's economical, physical, etc.
@@DeadlyCyanide1In China too. They went from the One Child Policy to 3 now due to the population decline. China also is no longer allowing international adoptions of their orphan children and encouraging adoption within the country.
@DeadlyCyanide1 but, asking genuinely here, why would it be an issue for places like the US to have a population decline? One of the biggest reasons people are choosing not to have kids is because they can't afford it. (Or don't like the political world). It feels overcrowded anyway, so a population decline would be better for the planet right?
This was so much like my mother-in-law. We want she want to cook dinner for us. And then she would tell my husband. That Caroline and I would share a piece because we are losing weight. It was so funny as I was not losing weight. I was not dying. I was probably back than 160 pounds and I’m close to 5 9
I used to date a Korean man, he always criticized me when I was spending time with my parents, especially my dad. He would say it's weird and yet he would hop in the shower with his mom and wash her back for her and they would get naked in front of each other while changing clothes and somehow that was okay according to him but me sitting next to my father was inappropriate? Make it make sense, luckily i dumped him and never married him. And thats just the beginning of all the crazy things that were going on
My Korean MIL was terrible to me. She said I trapped her son when he was the pursuer, I controlled him (whaaat?), and she didn't like me cause I am half Japanese. She didn't help with our wedding, gets mad if I get her gifts and if I don't, nothing I do is good enough. It's really sad.
@MultiDarkAngel91 It's been so hard the past 20 years. I've learned to just say yes to most anything. Otherwise, she gets mad. She's like a child who throws a fit when she doesn't get what she wants. I am criticized for everything. It's not as bad as before especially with returning mail to sender(me) and the harsh tones. Sigh.
❤Hey. It’s ok. Hug 🫂. Sorry some horrible people makes you feel like you are not good enough, but you are definitely good enough! Sometimes maybe try to let go and set up strong boundaries between your mother in-law helps.
Please, please, please do a series on these stories 🙏 I love that you don't just tell the story, but you give us cultural context too which really adds to it. Awesome video - thank you!! ❤
If a woman has a son and a daughter, but only ever shows love to her son and wants to sleep in the same room as him after he is married and always tries to make her daughter in law feel like a third wheel, then I don't think her feeling lonely has anything to do with it, but rather there's an incestuous component to the whole situation that I could NEVER be ok with.
Such a great narrator. As a yet to be married person, it really makes you think about the kinds of conversations you need to have BEFORE getting married, whatever the nationality of your partner is.
I think these conversations are really important. But you should also date longer than a year, about 3 years, for the mask to fall and to meet and be with the people in his life. And have your eyes open. He will not become better at anything after marriage, you get what you see. If he is weird around his parents, that's just what he will be and it warrants a conversation about boundaries with your own future kids too and your marriage after the kids grow up, because people often slip into becoming their parents, and he might assume you will act like his mom as a mom and wife.
I almost married a Korean man and luckily his mother was super sweet to me. She almost always had a gift for either me or my son and she didn’t need to do that. Now I wonder how she would’ve been had we gotten married. We still stay in touch even though I broke up with him many years ago.. and he passed away 2 years ago. 😔 I think I would’ve been lucky to have her as a MIL.
Same! I was listening to the meat for the son and vegetable for the daughter in law and imagined me catapulting food on the MIL with a spoon. I’m too much of a little sister to have people walk over me.
Mother - son enmeshment tends to be common in most Asian cultures. But it exists everywhere, truth be told. That's why mama's boys are considered low value partners.
As a viewer who viewed your content 7-8 years ago before i moved to Korea because I was planning to move to Korea, and is currently still in Korea now, I really like seeing this as sort of a "before and after" viewer. I really love that you're addressing Korea in its raw form and actual experiences because I don't see much out there focusing on what REAL life in Korea is like nowadays. I always describe it as the most advanced, yet backwards thinking society that if you try to make it make sense, then it's like putting a square peg into a round hole. That being said, I do love living here and have completely integrated into society. You must do that, but also stand up for your own culture and boundaries. It's alright to demand people meet you halfway. Super support you and am loving these conversations.
Thank god my (Korean) husband has made clear to me that he rather his own mom hate him than me. It sounds extreme but he puts it that way because my MIL sees anything negative as a personal attack (I suspect narcissism / cluster b personality disorder and apparently even the mention of her mental health throws her into a fit of rage). She has no concept of boundaries or even a filter so even then it’s a struggle, but I wouldn’t have lasted a year if my husband wasn’t on my side 😮💨 The MILs of these stories are unhinged but the husbands really need to wake up and step up…
Might not even be narcissism. My mom viewed constructive criticism as negative or not even just like constructive feedback and conversation as an attack on her character. Ppl arent taught as children these conversational, constructive feedback is a need for relationships. and then as grown adults refuse it because they were never taught that and for them, it was never a thing needed in their culture with their family. When it probably was needed just didn’t know what that was And their parents either. So generational trauma is what I’m explaining. Not normalizing and teaching constructive criticism/feedback doesn’t up their confidence as a person. You can do things that aren’t good or harmful to others without being a bad person. No criticism teaches ppl that when they are given these feedbacks it’s bad. And don’t know how to healthily respond to the feedback. So just a food for thought.
@@apl-h3q no worries, this is definitely food for thoughts :) I don't really have anyone to discuss this with so it's nice to have outside perspective. Obviously you don't have the whole picture but considering her whole family situation (both her parents are North Koreans that ended up finding each other in the South and stayed there for obvious reasons) there's definitely a lot of generational things at play that have shaped my MIL, and I'm sure teaching these kind of things to children was not even a consideration at the time.
I'm Korean. When my sister and I were young (under 10), my grandma told us to move a heavy object. My dad was at home, but we didn’t question it; we thought we were supposed to do that. My dad? He just sat there, watching us struggle with it. My mom wasn’t home at the time, but when she got back and found out, she was furious. Growing up, I can now see how messed up that was. My grandma just couldn’t stand to see her precious son lift a finger
Absolutely love this podcast type storytelling video especially when you use Korean to tell what people are saying and then you translate. This is such a fun, informative and a learning moment all rolled up into one! I hope you continue this way but even if you change up the story time videos, please keep the Korean/translation parts as it heightens the story’s drama!🎉
Megan is a natural raconteur and delivers these stories in such an engaging manner it's like just listening to a friend spill the tea😊 I'm enjoying these accounts of wayward mums-in-law. It's not unique to Korea, but the m-i-l's are so dramatic.
Thank you so much for the story time. REALLY enjoyed it and my heart goes out to the women going thru this abuse, because this is what it is, VERBAL ABUSE, INTIMIDATION, etc. You bringing light into it is part of the healing process. Hope you’re getting the recognition that you so well deserve 🙋🏾♀️🇨🇩💕
Girl, you had me cracking up at 9:00 - 9:10. Those words just about sums up these stories for many women. I like these vids. You're a good storyteller.
My mother did that even though my brother is 9 yrs younger.. but my trauma goes deeper than what can be shared on youtube but I'm glad the daughter was able to get out of there.
I'm really sorry you got stuck with TrashMom. My father blatantly preferred my younger sister; unfortunately, that led him into some very bad decisions. It hurt me a lot, too.
i told my husband that if we ever separate im stealing his mom because over the years she’s become my bestie, can’t even imagine having to deal with something like that
Greetings Mrs. Moon I’m on a business trip in Texas and Louisiana, and will return to Japan on the 25. Enjoying your content wherever I go in the world. Your American Brother who lives in Japan, Amani Bey
I love this content!!! I am not Korean but have a Korean M.I.L. I can relate so much to this! I went through the first half of my marriage feeling inadequate and insecure about my role in the home. My husband is half Korean and it took him a while to get over the guilt of sticking up for me against his mom. Things are much better now. But it was very painful to get to where we are now. Thank you for this content! Please continue with more. It sheds light and understanding on so many things.
These are obvious examples of emotional incest, a psychologist would have a field day with these people you talked about. Is the father-in-law so mentally checked the mother-in-law raised her son to be her emotional husband and therefore these sorts of behaviours have been normalised? These ladies are so tolerant
Being Zimbabwean, or rather African we have many of the same hierarchies when it comes to age and gender which presents many of the same issues in our cultures when couples get married. I understand that these are crazy stories but I certainly can't pretend I've never heard of such things. I blame societies built on putting a son/male on a pedestal, which is how many daughters and wives quickly lose value to everyone around them. From a young age you're expected to cater to everyone, including your male siblings, and to look at marriage as a huge achievement, to the point where girls are constantly being reprimanded by being told, 'if you act like this, no one will marry you' or 'You are going to embarrass us when you get married' etc and therefore in adulthood you're basically used to servitude and suffering silently in those traditions and ways of thinking. Women end up feeling like they have to do everything to preserve their marriages and it may not matter how awful that marriage is. The cultures are so similarly intense and sadly, changing that here may not come so soon since it benefits men so much. I really enjoyed this and would love to see more !
@@MrsMeganMoonloved this video. I'm in a relationship with a Korean man right now and as we start to get more serious I'm starting to panic after all I've heard about in-law culture. I am curious, do you think that being a White American woman helps in your situation? Like, are Korean in-laws known to be more flexible if the spouse is not Korean?
Feel a Megan youtube podcast forth coming. I'd be all in! These videos are so interesting and give alot of insight into cultural differences many people probably don't know about. Great content.
Thank you so much for this!!! It's so fascinating to see different cultural perspectives and hear all these stories! And yes absolutely, we should always consider historical and cultural/societal contexts as well as the psychological impact certain events would have. Always good to be empathetic! Would absolutely love similar content! Also hope you feel better soon 💛💛💛
@@MrsMeganMoon I would love any type of content about cultural or societal issues you may not expect to face unless you've actually lived there! You've covered marriage and loneliness/making connections or connecting to people emotionally but if you have other interesting experiences I would love to hear them!
Spilling the tea from a place of understanding and grace. I like that you're not judging anyone. That's new for RUclips "drama", and I like it! We can always expect a higher example/standard from you. Love your videos 😊
I endured 13 miserable years with a Sicilian mother-in-law. We only met with his parents once a month. After marriage, it was every Sunday. Everything we did was to please his mother. Finally, he said, “If you ask me to choose between you and my mother, I choose her.” What a relief! That was one of the happiest days of my life. I chose my own sanity.
Your content in psychology is really good, like your other videos, so in depth, precious information that can educate so many of us (even not from South Korea). Truly a gem. Keep it up!!
We all have a responsibility to assess whether behavior that's considered normal in our cultures is actually appropriate or not. The US considers a lot of really inappropriate behaviors to be normal. That doesn't mean I take advantage of that and behave in ways that common sense and decency tell me are actually not ok.
As a mother of 5 boys… I find it deeply disturbing when boy mothers do this sort of stuff… like why are you buying him underwear.. why do you insist on sleeping with him without their spouse. So creepy.. I’ll share beds with my adult boys but it’s usually so to lack of beds.. or my son and daughter in law insisted I sleep with them.. I still felt weird at first.. but in the end it’s family we can share.. but no the rest is so creepy
I just want to say I REALLY appreciate you doing the Korean and then mimicking the tone/cadence of the Korean in the English translation -- it really helps to get a feel for the way they communicate/culture in a way that you wouldn't normally see. Also, these stories are a great way to get through the work day. I'm a middle aged dude who got addicted to Kdramas...smh
I'm loving this new format. You're a good storyteller. Can I request for stories about bullying? I used to think they're exaggerations in k-dramas. But how can it be when it's such a common scene in almost all dramas?
Megan, you are part of the reason that mental health in Korea is on its way to improving. These videos are so informative and helpful and you present the information in a respectful and understanding way. And I really appreciate the cultural context. Thank you! I'd be interested in hearing about father-in-laws. And also relationships between mother and daughters.
Thank you for being objective and giving facts instead of just bashing/gossiping: I like how your intent is to educate and also say there is hope as things are changing.
Love this type of series! @MeganMoon could you perhaps do some stories like the same level of complexity as this story but with friendships in S.Korea? Relationships are complicated but I think friendships don't get spoken about enough.
The crazy part is that the wives will be the ones usually taking care of their elderly husband’s parents. Wouldn’t as a mother in law want to treat your daughter in law with so much care and love as she will most likely be the one to care for you in your old frail age? If you are horrible to your daughter in law l, expect to be treated the same in your old age. This was too good Megan, I need more of these!
The part where the MIL THREW away her mom’s food willingly with no remorse, upsets me beyond words. Even if it was an accident, she deserved that “accidental” hit. Ugh, that’s so upsetting. I’m hoping she left him. They both don’t deserve her, she’s too good for them. She definitely deserves happiness and better people around her. I love this! I would love to hear more stories, and the way you’re also teaching us the difference with cultures. Please give us more MIL tea 😳♥️
I agree with you. Literally when that part of the story came (where she found out that the MIL threw her mom's food away) I was literally throwing a PUNCH at the mil 👊 😤 in my own head. That's so angering and disrespectful.
I’ve always thought you were so eloquent and informative, I know you’ve been covering Korea for years but I feel like as I grow up and you grow up you keep teaching me new things depending on what era I’m at in life about Korea. I hope you keep covering similar topics :)
*Coming from Eastern European countries I understand how mothers are so attached to their sons because they had to support their parents and siblings in the future and the son was very pampered and the daughters were left to fend for themselves but Mrs. Kim's mother-in-law is beyond decency and common sense.*
Yes to more stories like these! Would love to hear what the psychologists/experts on the show comment on as well. Thanks so much for translating and telling these stories in such an engaging way! (Too bad theres no english subs on the jtbc news channel 😂)
Megan if you're going through it, blink twice for backup.😂 Kidding, but these videos are awesome. Your tv presenting background is evident and I can't wait for more vids!
I WAS wondering a bit! 😅 She’s seemed to have a good relationship with her in-laws, but I’m wondering if part of that is from her and Mr. Moon’s good boundaries!
I love this format Megan! You have such an engaging way of talking and I love that youre showing us stories we would normally never have access to bc of the cultural and language barrier! ❤
I love this pivot for you!! I would even love to have like podcast or talk show-style episodes where you discuss things, maybe even with Mr. Moon! (Although I know he works hard and may not have the time or energy)
Love these type of videos, thank you, honestly love listening about different cultures and etc. But these mother in law stories are CRAZY! Can’t wait to hear more! 😊
These videos are so interestingto me! Also, I am in love with your hair growth journey over the years! Is there any way you could make a video on your current hair routine(s) and favorite products and such? I'd love to see how you maintain your natural hair in Korea!
I genuinely think that these videos are great, Megan. I love hearing your voice and it's nice to listen to in the background while I work. Please make more of these videos!!
Wait a minute?! Two videos in a week?? We got lucky ❤❤ Edit: I would absolutely LOVE this to be a regular series. I like the way you tell the stories. More please!
Gosh! Anyone would think there isn’t a problem with low birth rates in South Korea! Do these Mother in laws not want their kids to be happy and have a family of their own? Do they not want grandchildren in a country where that’s becoming more and more rare? Thanks for sharing these crazy stories. Really interesting 😂
Your son is NOT your husband! 😩💀
Yes, and just a reminder ladies, women don't like a mama's boy.
🤢🤢
He's a super Mama's Boy!!🤣 He don't need a wife he needs a mother lol
NO NO NO NO NO THIS IS NOT HIS MOTHER'S JOB HE NEEDS TO PUT A STOP TO THAT ITS TIME GROW UP
The son and husband has no ass in that pants...(German saying for they have no guts.)
I am married to a Korean man. My husband told me the story of what his mother had to endure when she first married his father. It was brutal; she went through tremendous stress. His mom went through a lot, so she promised her son that she would never treat her future daughter-in-law the way hers did.
Long story short, my mother in law is the sweetest gentle person ever 🥰.
I love she decided to break the cycle instead of continuing it. Some people want others to suffer the same way they did.
❤
@@AE3lytehaus What a BLESSING! 🙌🏾🥰🙏🏾
My mother in law is the same. I cried when I heard how the grandparents treated her after she married my father in law, I was horrified. She has always treated me so sweetly, I'm so thankful.
It's the same with old east indian mother in laws too. They're terrible, trust me, I know....
It's considered emotional incest. The mother replaces the son as partner in their minds. Not uncommon in many nations and ethnicities unfortunately.
Exactly what I was thinking.
Ewwww
😂sadly in China most of the guys live with parents when they married 😂they are mommy boys😂
@@JoyofTear 😬
Yep. I am an American who had a German grandmother. She was very possessive of my father and straight up verbally abusive to my mother. Luckily my father moved hours away, but as a mental health professional in the US I've seen this quiet a bit across multiple ethnicities and cultures.
I’m Korean. My mom said my grandmother used to sleep on the floor outside of my mom & dad’s room when they got married….. talk about strange.
So strange
I would feel so awkward. Like don't they want to have grandchildren? 😅
Did your grandmother ever get over that kind of behavior? I'm sorry, it's just that this is so interesting to talk about, it's so foreign to me
Oh so this is why the population is in decline
That's creepy lol 😂
Ugh mama's boy's kill me. Mother in laws ruin more marriages than they know. You're son is not the only precious being in this world. Wives are someone's precious daughters too smh
And some MILs love their DIL for taking on their son 😄
Let's not forget to blame the father in law for making his own wife so miserable that she developed an unhealthy attachment to her son
Actually mama's boys ruin their mariages, because it doesn't matter how crazy the mother in law is, if the son is on the side of his wife and set boundaries between his mother and his closest family (wife & children), this kind of thing wouldn't happen.
This happens because the son allows it to happen. He has the responsibility to deal with his crazy mother, not the daughter in law.
Girls: Never ever get involved with mommy's boys. Korean mommy's boys: run away! Don't even look at them!
But it's also about the son. If one of his parents treats his love interest like sh*t why don't they say anything? I know being respectful and greatful towards your parents is a huge thing in Korea but at some point of mistreating you need to Man up. You don't even need to be disrespectful to stand up for your wife 🤷🏻
@@Kat-px7mq That would require real courage
Don't these mother in-laws want grandchildren?
They are making their sons ineligible
@Georgie13 My MIL has several grandchildren. To some, she has had some relationship especially when they were younger. For others, she really has no relationship.
Especially with the decline in kids right now. It's not even happening only there I mean like the mother-in-law thing I've only ever heard coming from South Korea that is something maybe uniquely there but I know Japan is having an issue with a decline in children and actually Tokyo just put out that in a decade it'll be too late they'll cross the threshold of hitting a no going back zone to the decline of the amount of people not having kids. And then even in the United States it's becoming an issue where people are just not having enough kids. They're either choosing their pets are plants to be children instead. But there's like so many reasons why this is happening. There's economical, physical, etc.
@@DeadlyCyanide1In China too. They went from the One Child Policy to 3 now due to the population decline. China also is no longer allowing international adoptions of their orphan children and encouraging adoption within the country.
@DeadlyCyanide1 but, asking genuinely here, why would it be an issue for places like the US to have a population decline? One of the biggest reasons people are choosing not to have kids is because they can't afford it. (Or don't like the political world).
It feels overcrowded anyway, so a population decline would be better for the planet right?
@@Doggiemix1Disallowing foreign adoptions sounds like a great idea 🤦♀️
14 seconds in 👀👂🏾"GURRRRRL, WHATTTTT?!" 🍿🍿🍿
😂😂😂😂
This was so much like my mother-in-law. We want she want to cook dinner for us. And then she would tell my husband.
That Caroline and I would share a piece because we are losing weight. It was so funny as I was not losing weight. I was not dying. I was probably back than 160 pounds and I’m close to 5 9
OK, the sleeping part. My mother-in-law would never do sleeping with her son.
Omg my reaction too. Whhhaaaaaaat the heeeeeellll?
Took the words right out of my mouth! Insane!
I used to date a Korean man, he always criticized me when I was spending time with my parents, especially my dad. He would say it's weird and yet he would hop in the shower with his mom and wash her back for her and they would get naked in front of each other while changing clothes and somehow that was okay according to him but me sitting next to my father was inappropriate? Make it make sense, luckily i dumped him and never married him. And thats just the beginning of all the crazy things that were going on
Wait girl WHAT???? 😳😳😳
Whaaaaat!!! Omoooo
No freaking way that's insane. Was she elderly? I mean it's good that he still helps her but that is too much
Projection.
@suiren5272 - Even if she is elderly, if they're both naked? No way. 🤢
My Korean MIL was terrible to me. She said I trapped her son when he was the pursuer, I controlled him (whaaat?), and she didn't like me cause I am half Japanese. She didn't help with our wedding, gets mad if I get her gifts and if I don't, nothing I do is good enough. It's really sad.
She sounds like my Korean MIL.
@MultiDarkAngel91 It's been so hard the past 20 years. I've learned to just say yes to most anything. Otherwise, she gets mad. She's like a child who throws a fit when she doesn't get what she wants. I am criticized for everything. It's not as bad as before especially with returning mail to sender(me) and the harsh tones. Sigh.
@@hopefulgal025 ( i am person in california replying you) sis, your gimbap and jjapchae are delicious enough ! happy september
❤Hey. It’s ok. Hug 🫂. Sorry some horrible people makes you feel like you are not good enough, but you are definitely good enough! Sometimes maybe try to let go and set up strong boundaries between your mother in-law helps.
@@hopefulgal025 go to marriage counceling with your husband. that's what convinced my husband to force boundrys.
Please, please, please do a series on these stories 🙏 I love that you don't just tell the story, but you give us cultural context too which really adds to it. Awesome video - thank you!! ❤
I agree. I read and watch to many aita and stories on reddit would be great to have a different cultural perspective on stories like these
Yessss
Yeees, What did the commentators in the show said?
But don't forget your twins too!!
I like the little snippets of when you speak Korean too. Your story telling is very calming too
If a woman has a son and a daughter, but only ever shows love to her son and wants to sleep in the same room as him after he is married and always tries to make her daughter in law feel like a third wheel, then I don't think her feeling lonely has anything to do with it, but rather there's an incestuous component to the whole situation that I could NEVER be ok with.
Honestly, loving this new content.
Yaaay! I’m so happy that you enjoy it ❤❤
Me too!!❤
Same!!
same :)
Such a great narrator. As a yet to be married person, it really makes you think about the kinds of conversations you need to have BEFORE getting married, whatever the nationality of your partner is.
Or forgetting about it completely. Getting married these days is like playing Russian roulette with your life. So sad.
I think these conversations are really important. But you should also date longer than a year, about 3 years, for the mask to fall and to meet and be with the people in his life. And have your eyes open. He will not become better at anything after marriage, you get what you see. If he is weird around his parents, that's just what he will be and it warrants a conversation about boundaries with your own future kids too and your marriage after the kids grow up, because people often slip into becoming their parents, and he might assume you will act like his mom as a mom and wife.
I almost married a Korean man and luckily his mother was super sweet to me. She almost always had a gift for either me or my son and she didn’t need to do that.
Now I wonder how she would’ve been had we gotten married. We still stay in touch even though I broke up with him many years ago.. and he passed away 2 years ago. 😔 I think I would’ve been lucky to have her as a MIL.
May he rest in peace
My petty self would never let anyone treat me that way.
Same! I was listening to the meat for the son and vegetable for the daughter in law and imagined me catapulting food on the MIL with a spoon. I’m too much of a little sister to have people walk over me.
Same. If someone treat me like this, I probably explode right there lol
SAME!!
Mother - son enmeshment tends to be common in most Asian cultures. But it exists everywhere, truth be told. That's why mama's boys are considered low value partners.
Yes but there is a social stigma for that in the western culture. It’s not there in Asian culture. It’s crazy that the father doesn’t object.
Throwing away someone else's food is crazy.
I gasped and clutched my pearls 😮😂
that should be a divorce offence
That was heartbreaking!
Especially since it was from her MOM!
Kimchi?lol
As a viewer who viewed your content 7-8 years ago before i moved to Korea because I was planning to move to Korea, and is currently still in Korea now, I really like seeing this as sort of a "before and after" viewer. I really love that you're addressing Korea in its raw form and actual experiences because I don't see much out there focusing on what REAL life in Korea is like nowadays. I always describe it as the most advanced, yet backwards thinking society that if you try to make it make sense, then it's like putting a square peg into a round hole. That being said, I do love living here and have completely integrated into society. You must do that, but also stand up for your own culture and boundaries. It's alright to demand people meet you halfway. Super support you and am loving these conversations.
The lack of love in marriage and then abuse from their in-laws and only loving your child can lead to these extreme cases
Thank god my (Korean) husband has made clear to me that he rather his own mom hate him than me. It sounds extreme but he puts it that way because my MIL sees anything negative as a personal attack (I suspect narcissism / cluster b personality disorder and apparently even the mention of her mental health throws her into a fit of rage). She has no concept of boundaries or even a filter so even then it’s a struggle, but I wouldn’t have lasted a year if my husband wasn’t on my side 😮💨 The MILs of these stories are unhinged but the husbands really need to wake up and step up…
Might not even be narcissism. My mom viewed constructive criticism as negative or not even just like constructive feedback and conversation as an attack on her character. Ppl arent taught as children these conversational, constructive feedback is a need for relationships. and then as grown adults refuse it because they were never taught that and for them, it was never a thing needed in their culture with their family. When it probably was needed just didn’t know what that was And their parents either. So generational trauma is what I’m explaining. Not normalizing and teaching constructive criticism/feedback doesn’t up their confidence as a person. You can do things that aren’t good or harmful to others without being a bad person. No criticism teaches ppl that when they are given these feedbacks it’s bad. And don’t know how to healthily respond to the feedback. So just a food for thought.
Also my bad for the long response. 😅 I’m taking a child development class (it’s part of my degree) and yeah-this is my way of processing things haha
@@apl-h3q no worries, this is definitely food for thoughts :) I don't really have anyone to discuss this with so it's nice to have outside perspective. Obviously you don't have the whole picture but considering her whole family situation (both her parents are North Koreans that ended up finding each other in the South and stayed there for obvious reasons) there's definitely a lot of generational things at play that have shaped my MIL, and I'm sure teaching these kind of things to children was not even a consideration at the time.
I'm Korean. When my sister and I were young (under 10), my grandma told us to move a heavy object. My dad was at home, but we didn’t question it; we thought we were supposed to do that. My dad? He just sat there, watching us struggle with it. My mom wasn’t home at the time, but when she got back and found out, she was furious. Growing up, I can now see how messed up that was. My grandma just couldn’t stand to see her precious son lift a finger
The hot korean tea... ty for doing this. This shrimp peeling sounds like perilla leaf drama.
Looking forward to.this series.
omg I forgot about perilla leaf drama lmao
JK?
🤣@@KimmyGibson
Girlllll we need more of these stories!!! I’m invested 😂 as a southern (Georgia) woman , we could nevahhhh
That is insane. Yup divorce would be in motion with both of them. My mouth was wide open for both stories. Thanks Megan.
Me too. It was an excellent video. I kept saying over & over “oh that would be a deal breaker.”
9:00 to 9:10 😂😂😂 “If you ever… if she ever.. we be done because… I could never” I replayed that multiple times
Absolutely love this podcast type storytelling video especially when you use Korean to tell what people are saying and then you translate. This is such a fun, informative and a learning moment all rolled up into one! I hope you continue this way but even if you change up the story time videos, please keep the Korean/translation parts as it heightens the story’s drama!🎉
It’s one thing to love your sons but to be obsessed with them is concerning
Megan is a natural raconteur and delivers these stories in such an engaging manner it's like just listening to a friend spill the tea😊
I'm enjoying these accounts of wayward mums-in-law. It's not unique to Korea, but the m-i-l's are so dramatic.
Thank you so much for the story time. REALLY enjoyed it and my heart goes out to the women going thru this abuse, because this is what it is, VERBAL ABUSE, INTIMIDATION, etc. You bringing light into it is part of the healing process. Hope you’re getting the recognition that you so well deserve 🙋🏾♀️🇨🇩💕
Girl, you had me cracking up at 9:00 - 9:10. Those words just about sums up these stories for many women. I like these vids. You're a good storyteller.
My mother did that even though my brother is 9 yrs younger.. but my trauma goes deeper than what can be shared on youtube but I'm glad the daughter was able to get out of there.
I'm really sorry you got stuck with TrashMom. My father blatantly preferred my younger sister; unfortunately, that led him into some very bad decisions. It hurt me a lot, too.
i told my husband that if we ever separate im stealing his mom because over the years she’s become my bestie, can’t even imagine having to deal with something like that
Greetings Mrs. Moon
I’m on a business trip in Texas and Louisiana, and will return to Japan on the 25. Enjoying your content wherever I go in the world.
Your American Brother who lives in Japan, Amani Bey
❤❤❤ have a safe trip. And thanks for watching and supporting
@@MrsMeganMoon
Always. You are the best!
Safe trip
@@rhodaosei2972
Thanks
I love this content!!! I am not Korean but have a Korean M.I.L. I can relate so much to this! I went through the first half of my marriage feeling inadequate and insecure about my role in the home. My husband is half Korean and it took him a while to get over the guilt of sticking up for me against his mom. Things are much better now. But it was very painful to get to where we are now. Thank you for this content! Please continue with more. It sheds light and understanding on so many things.
These are obvious examples of emotional incest, a psychologist would have a field day with these people you talked about. Is the father-in-law so mentally checked the mother-in-law raised her son to be her emotional husband and therefore these sorts of behaviours have been normalised?
These ladies are so tolerant
This was so cool to watch, they way you emote in Korean and then translate makes it even more relatable. More of this would be great😄👍
As someone with a korean mother in law, thank you for sharing these stories! Not all relationships are like this, but they are rather common sadly.
Being Zimbabwean, or rather African we have many of the same hierarchies when it comes to age and gender which presents many of the same issues in our cultures when couples get married. I understand that these are crazy stories but I certainly can't pretend I've never heard of such things. I blame societies built on putting a son/male on a pedestal, which is how many daughters and wives quickly lose value to everyone around them. From a young age you're expected to cater to everyone, including your male siblings, and to look at marriage as a huge achievement, to the point where girls are constantly being reprimanded by being told, 'if you act like this, no one will marry you' or 'You are going to embarrass us when you get married' etc and therefore in adulthood you're basically used to servitude and suffering silently in those traditions and ways of thinking. Women end up feeling like they have to do everything to preserve their marriages and it may not matter how awful that marriage is. The cultures are so similarly intense and sadly, changing that here may not come so soon since it benefits men so much. I really enjoyed this and would love to see more !
😢
Very curious about single mothers and the pressure to give up your baby for adoption. I've heard things..... Thanks Megan! Very interesting video.
Aww Megan, I'm sick right now too so I'm sending extra healing prayers your way! 🫂🙏🏾🤗
Awww we are both sick :( you feel better too
@@MrsMeganMoonloved this video. I'm in a relationship with a Korean man right now and as we start to get more serious I'm starting to panic after all I've heard about in-law culture. I am curious, do you think that being a White American woman helps in your situation? Like, are Korean in-laws known to be more flexible if the spouse is not Korean?
@@MrsMeganMoon - Thank you! 🤗🙏🏾
Feel a Megan youtube podcast forth coming. I'd be all in! These videos are so interesting and give alot of insight into cultural differences many people probably don't know about. Great content.
Thank you so much for this!!! It's so fascinating to see different cultural perspectives and hear all these stories! And yes absolutely, we should always consider historical and cultural/societal contexts as well as the psychological impact certain events would have. Always good to be empathetic! Would absolutely love similar content!
Also hope you feel better soon 💛💛💛
Any particular topics that you want me to cover?
@@MrsMeganMoon I would love any type of content about cultural or societal issues you may not expect to face unless you've actually lived there! You've covered marriage and loneliness/making connections or connecting to people emotionally but if you have other interesting experiences I would love to hear them!
The tea was SPILT! 😂😂 this video was good. I’m curious what percentage of your viewers are Koreans living in Korea!
Yes I want to know too😂
Love these types of videos that are like podcasts because you can listen it at anywhere
Spilling the tea from a place of understanding and grace. I like that you're not judging anyone. That's new for RUclips "drama", and I like it! We can always expect a higher example/standard from you. Love your videos 😊
I endured 13 miserable years with a Sicilian mother-in-law. We only met with his parents once a month. After marriage, it was every Sunday. Everything we did was to please his mother. Finally, he said, “If you ask me to choose between you and my mother, I choose her.” What a relief! That was one of the happiest days of my life. I chose my own sanity.
Your content in psychology is really good, like your other videos, so in depth, precious information that can educate so many of us (even not from South Korea). Truly a gem. Keep it up!!
I have to say... the new makeup is on POINT!! 😘
We all have a responsibility to assess whether behavior that's considered normal in our cultures is actually appropriate or not. The US considers a lot of really inappropriate behaviors to be normal. That doesn't mean I take advantage of that and behave in ways that common sense and decency tell me are actually not ok.
Fr
Oooooh I’m curious? Like what?!
Megan, you're captivating as a storyteller. 🤩🌠
Yayyy!!! we need more content like this! Love it!!!!
❤❤❤❤ ok i will!
Could not click fast enough on this!
❤❤❤❤ thank you for watching and supporting~~
❤❤❤
Megan you’re such a great story teller! The switching from English to Korean made it even better.
As a mother of 5 boys… I find it deeply disturbing when boy mothers do this sort of stuff… like why are you buying him underwear.. why do you insist on sleeping with him without their spouse. So creepy.. I’ll share beds with my adult boys but it’s usually so to lack of beds.. or my son and daughter in law insisted I sleep with them.. I still felt weird at first.. but in the end it’s family we can share.. but no the rest is so creepy
I just want to say I REALLY appreciate you doing the Korean and then mimicking the tone/cadence of the Korean in the English translation -- it really helps to get a feel for the way they communicate/culture in a way that you wouldn't normally see. Also, these stories are a great way to get through the work day. I'm a middle aged dude who got addicted to Kdramas...smh
Love these type of sit down/ story time videos ! Keep em coming ! ❤❤❤
I'm loving this new format. You're a good storyteller. Can I request for stories about bullying? I used to think they're exaggerations in k-dramas. But how can it be when it's such a common scene in almost all dramas?
Megan, you are part of the reason that mental health in Korea is on its way to improving. These videos are so informative and helpful and you present the information in a respectful and understanding way. And I really appreciate the cultural context. Thank you!
I'd be interested in hearing about father-in-laws. And also relationships between mother and daughters.
i love the tone you take when you impersonate the mils ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ
please make a series out of this ❤
Thank you for being objective and giving facts instead of just bashing/gossiping: I like how your intent is to educate and also say there is hope as things are changing.
Love this type of series! @MeganMoon could you perhaps do some stories like the same level of complexity as this story but with friendships in S.Korea? Relationships are complicated but I think friendships don't get spoken about enough.
Yooooo would love that!! I lived five years in Korea and it was SO hard to make lasting friends!
Thank you for sharing the Korean culture! Don’t think modern women will tolerate this kind of behavior from their mother in law! 😊
Omg, I love this new content! I’m so intrigued by cultural differences. More please 🤍😊
The crazy part is that the wives will be the ones usually taking care of their elderly husband’s parents. Wouldn’t as a mother in law want to treat your daughter in law with so much care and love as she will most likely be the one to care for you in your old frail age? If you are horrible to your daughter in law l, expect to be treated the same in your old age. This was too good Megan, I need more of these!
The part where the MIL THREW away her mom’s food willingly with no remorse, upsets me beyond words.
Even if it was an accident, she deserved that “accidental” hit. Ugh, that’s so upsetting. I’m hoping she left him. They both don’t deserve her, she’s too good for them. She definitely deserves happiness and better people around her.
I love this! I would love to hear more stories, and the way you’re also teaching us the difference with cultures. Please give us more MIL tea 😳♥️
I agree with you. Literally when that part of the story came (where she found out that the MIL threw her mom's food away) I was literally throwing a PUNCH at the mil 👊 😤 in my own head. That's so angering and disrespectful.
I’m living for these . Bring us more crazy stories 😅
Thx for bringing the hot 🥵 piping tea 🫖! Every culture has mess 😅 we totally get a few stories don’t represent everyone. Pls share more stories!
I’ve always thought you were so eloquent and informative, I know you’ve been covering Korea for years but I feel like as I grow up and you grow up you keep teaching me new things depending on what era I’m at in life about Korea. I hope you keep covering similar topics :)
Girl! You need to start a podcast!!! Your voice sounds so good already and the content is top-notch!
I love this! Please do more and tell more. I love the way you tell the stories and add the Korean dialogs.
The story telling is best selling gurlllll yassss love this and can’t wait to hear mor🥰🫰🏼🤙
Girl I am loving STORY TIME!!! Give us MORE! can you talk about the Courtney enthusiast case cuz giiirrrllll the AUDACITY!!!
*Coming from Eastern European countries I understand how mothers are so attached to their sons because they had to support their parents and siblings in the future and the son was very pampered and the daughters were left to fend for themselves but Mrs. Kim's mother-in-law is beyond decency and common sense.*
Yes to more stories like these! Would love to hear what the psychologists/experts on the show comment on as well. Thanks so much for translating and telling these stories in such an engaging way! (Too bad theres no english subs on the jtbc news channel 😂)
Megan if you're going through it, blink twice for backup.😂 Kidding, but these videos are awesome. Your tv presenting background is evident and I can't wait for more vids!
I WAS wondering a bit! 😅 She’s seemed to have a good relationship with her in-laws, but I’m wondering if part of that is from her and Mr. Moon’s good boundaries!
I love this format Megan! You have such an engaging way of talking and I love that youre showing us stories we would normally never have access to bc of the cultural and language barrier! ❤
I appreciate how you respect the Korean culture but will not allow it/anyone to change/or shame you from being your authentic self❤❤❤❤
This makes sense why the marriage and birth rate is low! go figure why any woman would get married under those kinds of circumstances 🤔
Girl i'm loving this sort of gossip time videos!!! I'm eating these stories up!
I love this pivot for you!! I would even love to have like podcast or talk show-style episodes where you discuss things, maybe even with Mr. Moon! (Although I know he works hard and may not have the time or energy)
Love this commentary
I really like this podcast-like type of content! It's so relaxing to listen to while you're eating and you don't always have to look at the screen
Love these type of videos, thank you, honestly love listening about different cultures and etc. But these mother in law stories are CRAZY! Can’t wait to hear more!
😊
You're an incredible story teller! Love these types of videos.
But also miss the kids and Mr Moon
More of like this content please. So interesting!
These videos are so interestingto me! Also, I am in love with your hair growth journey over the years! Is there any way you could make a video on your current hair routine(s) and favorite products and such? I'd love to see how you maintain your natural hair in Korea!
Thanks for sharing.
You’re a great storyteller!! 🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤
I genuinely think that these videos are great, Megan. I love hearing your voice and it's nice to listen to in the background while I work. Please make more of these videos!!
Wait a minute?! Two videos in a week?? We got lucky ❤❤ Edit: I would absolutely LOVE this to be a regular series. I like the way you tell the stories. More please!
i really like this sit down format cause i can listen at work, thank you!
Ur such a good story teller! Keep these type of videos coming! ❤
I’d love to hear more of these stories!! 😮
Oh hell nooooo! Please keep uploading these!
Hey Megan, thank you for talking about this.
The meeting before marriage with the shrimp should have been the eye opener for Mrs Kim(trouble down the road)🤦🤦
loving these talk-style videos! if you enjoy making them, more please!
Gosh! Anyone would think there isn’t a problem with low birth rates in South Korea! Do these Mother in laws not want their kids to be happy and have a family of their own? Do they not want grandchildren in a country where that’s becoming more and more rare? Thanks for sharing these crazy stories. Really interesting 😂
I love these styles of videos!
Im finally early to something 🎉❤😂
Yaaay! ❤❤❤