Why I'm Single at 24 (the truth about modern relationships)

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  • Опубликовано: 25 ноя 2024

Комментарии • 4,9 тыс.

  • @ColeHastings
    @ColeHastings  3 года назад +996

    I'm sure there's a whole ton of other points I missed, so leave them in the comments. Keep in mind this is just my opinion, I'm open to hearing different ones and changing mine

    • @xMckingwill
      @xMckingwill 3 года назад +27

      So you saying we all trash huh?? Lol
      But seriously I like to call it Overdosing on the red pill.

    • @kuroBozi
      @kuroBozi 3 года назад +31

      @@xMckingwill yea everybody trash but we try to do better

    • @xMckingwill
      @xMckingwill 3 года назад +1

      @@kuroBozi yup lol

    • @jogoseamvs9871
      @jogoseamvs9871 3 года назад +1

      ruclips.net/video/yrKpyG-Mof8/видео.html

    • @kameronsaldivia8596
      @kameronsaldivia8596 3 года назад +15

      Heartbreak is one of the reasons people are afraid I was too. I had done a lot to better myself but the journey never ends but overall I am happy and enjoy the small conversations and more in life.

  • @medviation
    @medviation 3 года назад +6044

    As a man, getting heartbroken is one thing. Getting your assets, career, reputation and children being taken away from you is a whole different animal.

    • @verfed
      @verfed 3 года назад +852

      Exactly. Both sexes get their heart broken while only men get everything taken away from them.

    • @zumponer4257
      @zumponer4257 3 года назад +321

      happened to my dad

    • @scottarmstrong5876
      @scottarmstrong5876 3 года назад +515

      Thats why you don't take life advice from 24 year olds

    • @alexsmith-ox8fk
      @alexsmith-ox8fk 3 года назад +226

      Exactly. Taking the red pill trully changed my life for the better when i was at my lowest feeling completely lost.

    • @kingkylie9655
      @kingkylie9655 3 года назад +93

      As a woman with more money (300k+ salary) and assets than every guy I’ve been with I feel the same.

  • @TechnicalDifficulties
    @TechnicalDifficulties 3 года назад +5246

    "there's no toxic masculinity and there's no toxic femininity, just sh*tty broken men and women" - best quote, Cole Hastings

    • @musicjunk1000
      @musicjunk1000 3 года назад +91

      you know, these are just concepts that are trying to summarize repetitive and structural patterns in gender specific behaviour. no need to trash them

    • @RidinMyGrandmasCadillac
      @RidinMyGrandmasCadillac 3 года назад +144

      @@musicjunk1000 these concepts are only used to make society worse

    • @vyse102
      @vyse102 3 года назад +15

      @@RidinMyGrandmasCadillac In what way?

    • @VD-cc4hx
      @VD-cc4hx 3 года назад +34

      @@vyse102 go to any mgtow video where men are constantly trashing women. or red pilled. they always say that women don't work the same jobs as men, but jobs are something you choose. you choose to have a bad, low end, and dangerous job were a lot of people die like the military or construction instead of striving for a college educated job like programming or something.
      or that women are better at everything, which is what most men think about feminism. those are the two viewpoints.

    • @ChocolateEffigy
      @ChocolateEffigy 3 года назад +7

      Well they both exist

  • @salomonsarmiento6274
    @salomonsarmiento6274 3 года назад +768

    I felt miserable with my partner, so decided to stay single. I think I wasn't happy with myself, my career, my body. Decided to love me first and focus on myself first

    • @ColeHastings
      @ColeHastings  3 года назад +94

      That's the key

    • @yahhu4122
      @yahhu4122 3 года назад +6

      Absolutely

    • @Jin-pt4en
      @Jin-pt4en 3 года назад +20

      10 years ago, I did this,......... and I stayed single since. hahahahaha

    • @stevetheiii477
      @stevetheiii477 3 года назад +10

      @@Erik-nw3kc facts, me personally i'm also good with dating knowing that i'm on my purpose and have other things to focus on than just the girl i'm dating, at the end of the day a relationship isn't gonna fully be within your control and can end abruptly at any moment but your goals will always be a constant factor, learning to love yourself and being content with being alone is key for any man or woman at the end of the day people come and go and the only person you can trust to always be around is you

    • @Evolving_aaron
      @Evolving_aaron 3 года назад +5

      It takes each person to be whole to have a healthy relationship. I relate so hard to this and have CHOSEN to stay single this past year. You really start to understand your true worth and value and appreciate/love your own self 🙏🔥

  • @Bullboy_Adventures
    @Bullboy_Adventures 2 года назад +878

    When I was a little kid, I told my parents I would NEVER EVER have a girlfriend. Several years later, I grew up to be a man. A man of my word!!!

    • @MachineMan-mj4gj
      @MachineMan-mj4gj 2 года назад +124

      I bet my parents $20 I would remain single all through high school. I earned those $20, goddammit.

    • @Pablo-Iza
      @Pablo-Iza 2 года назад +51

      @@MachineMan-mj4gj damn, I should've bet too, I would be rich by now.

    • @khaorix2667
      @khaorix2667 2 года назад +33

      Congrats on your coming out man, it takes balls

    • @malkn1754
      @malkn1754 2 года назад +13

      @@MachineMan-mj4gj i shouldve made that bet too xD

    • @godnyx117
      @godnyx117 2 года назад +13

      Welcome to the team brother!!

  • @ChaplainJoshua
    @ChaplainJoshua 3 года назад +2734

    Maybe the real relationships were the friends we made along the way.

    • @ColeHastings
      @ColeHastings  3 года назад +265

      Haha ok

    • @anikevin
      @anikevin 3 года назад +113

      I didn't make any friends
      rip

    • @Greenrivers14
      @Greenrivers14 3 года назад +88

      Friends? what are those?

    • @paulthorwesten7377
      @paulthorwesten7377 3 года назад +119

      My girlfriend just dumped me last month and I’ve already started putting a lot of effort in my friendships. You are absolutely right. The boys are there for you 💪

    • @Greenrivers14
      @Greenrivers14 3 года назад +30

      @@paulthorwesten7377 That's great, you probably didn't completely abandon them once you got into a relationship however that's what a lot of girls do.

  • @euphemius_X
    @euphemius_X 3 года назад +1128

    The social media is a MAJOR problem in all of this

    • @selenamayfield5165
      @selenamayfield5165 3 года назад +33

      I dont think so. You people love to blame things in everything else except yourselves. It's not social media, it's you.

    • @jaydthatsme
      @jaydthatsme 3 года назад +117

      @@selenamayfield5165 okay lol I don’t see how you don’t think it’s apart of the problem

    • @euphemius_X
      @euphemius_X 3 года назад +125

      @@selenamayfield5165 sweetie if you think it's okay for women to have tons of male followers validating and pumping up their self worth without providing any intrinsic value besides body pictures and TikTok dances then you're part of the problem and I have no respect for you. But do as you wish, it's your life not mine. I'm not going to let my future wife be part of this wicked game.

    • @selenamayfield5165
      @selenamayfield5165 3 года назад +7

      @@euphemius_X lol..if the woman was smart, she'd know to stay away from you. And no, I don't think that. I think people should mind their business. Who fucking cares what they do?

    • @selenamayfield5165
      @selenamayfield5165 3 года назад +1

      @@euphemius_X plus, I really dont think its social media. I think it's your horrible personality

  • @tacittalks9378
    @tacittalks9378 3 года назад +574

    I think a main part of the growing problem is that with modern technology and social media, it's become too easy to find vast amounts of people. When you have too many options, you naturally start to compare people in a relative scale of attractiveness.
    Back before the internet, the people you met in person or lived around was basically your dating pool. Now, the dating pool can be as vast as the entire continent you live on.

    • @MaddDxD
      @MaddDxD 3 года назад +53

      Many think the grass is greener on the other side.

    • @3_3-i9e
      @3_3-i9e 3 года назад +8

      True, women, yes, even men do not need to take responsibility. Split up and can choose the easier option ... Tinder Bumble

    • @mohamgghar3736
      @mohamgghar3736 3 года назад +70

      Yes but history Is filled with people who had mistresses, affairs, shielding behavior, partner being left for a better prospect. Social media isn’t to blame, people are. Social media doesn’t make decisions, people do.

    • @BG-sq7zf
      @BG-sq7zf 3 года назад +8

      What most simps, feminist fe/males, white-knights, betas and conservative guys fail to realize: bad boys provide excitement, novelty, unpredictability and fun (fear, roller-coaster drama) to a new level. In other words, stability and commitment (no longer) won't cut it for today's 🦄. Why is that? Before she was your girlfriend, wife or lover, she already had been "run through" so many guys. And each time she slept with someone (both wo/men), she lost a part of her psyche, well-being or mind/soul/spirit. In other words, she is no longer able to have emotional attachment in a healthy or committed way.
      *Sex and Culture* by Joseph Daniel Unwin
      *The Rational Male Series* by Rollo Tomassi
      *The Manipulated Man* by Esther Vilar
      *The Myth of Male Power* by Warren Farrell
      *The Feminist Lie: It Was Never About Equality* by Bob Lewis
      *Anatomy of Female Power* by Chinweizu Ibekwe
      *Men on Strike* by Helen Smith
      *Silent Weapons for Quiet Wars: An Introductory Programing Manual* by Anonymous
      Isaiah 3:12
      *Childish* leaders oppress my people, and *women* rule over them. O my people, your leaders mislead you; they send you down the wrong road.
      Proverbs 31:3
      Don't give your strength (attention, resources, mental point origen) to women, nor your ways to that which destroys kings.
      Ezekiel 23:20
      There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.
      Feminist's Ideology from Sheryl Sandberg, chief operating officer of Facebook:
      "My advice to women is date all of them: the bad boys, the cool boys, the commitment-phobic boys, the crazy boys. But do not marry them. The things that make the bad boys sexy do not make them good husbands. When it comes time to settle down, find someone who wants an equal partner. Someone who thinks women should be smart, opinionated and ambitious. Someone who values fairness and expects or, even better, wants to do his share in the home. These men exist and, trust me, over time, nothing is sexier."

    • @eliascontreras1951
      @eliascontreras1951 3 года назад +31

      @@mohamgghar3736 youre right, social media isnt to blame but it is a part of the problem to a certain point

  • @kaitlynbetts7912
    @kaitlynbetts7912 2 года назад +160

    I think spending time alone and learning to love yourself helps prepare you for a loving and healthy relationship

    • @dangreenarrow2596
      @dangreenarrow2596 2 года назад +8

      Exacly this happened for me I was self improving and making super huge changes in my life to like/love me for who I am. I got to comfortable in my last relationship and was lacking. I hated myself and who I had become. I moved from my home and became so depressed. Now that it's been a few weeks since the break up it's been an eye opener. Feelings of loving myself are coming back and I'm collecting this experience as a huge knowledge base of what I want in a partnership and myself. I'll tell you what pumping iron or staying way to busy really helps the mental health.

    • @HansensUniverseT-A
      @HansensUniverseT-A 2 года назад +9

      Generally as soon as you enter a relationship you slowly but sure wither away and you don't even realize it until you escape, you will become miserable, truth is, relationships will suck up most of your energy and time, not surprising how people hardly have extra extracurricular or anything that doesn't involve pandering to that darn relationship overshadowing one's real desires, the number of people spending their lives locked away in a relationship thinking about what they could have been doing in that moment, deciding to stay single is the greatest life decision i ever did.

    • @Dani_33
      @Dani_33 Год назад

      ​@@HansensUniverseT-Aif that's how you view relationships, then that's how you're reality will always be. That's your reality tunnel. Just cuz that's how you see it doesnt mean it will apply to each and every person on this planet.

  • @MrEOM41
    @MrEOM41 3 года назад +1838

    I honestly feel like the traditional way of dating is done, if you aren’t with someone you met pre 2010s decade it’s a wrap 😅. Social media ruined the entire dating world.

    • @rsrs6959
      @rsrs6959 3 года назад +207

      pre 2010s was good times :(

    • @ASilva-ui6rm
      @ASilva-ui6rm 3 года назад +12

      True

    • @rsrs6959
      @rsrs6959 3 года назад +19

      @@jesquesan Try and connect with her, and if she is not taken, then go for it.

    • @adventures223
      @adventures223 3 года назад +22

      @Aaron good point there you are right i think everyone needs to be single for a couple of years at least better when you are young so you can think alone and have some freedom

    • @renttojo
      @renttojo 3 года назад +24

      Huh I was 7 in 2010 so what your saying is I'm fucked I'm gonna be alone forever and I should just kill myself cuz this is a meaningless world cuz although I may have money and clout I'll be alone touch starved and overall just unhappy with everything cuz I have no one to share intimate moments with hmmmmm damn

  • @Prototype9871
    @Prototype9871 3 года назад +1320

    A wise man learns from his mistakes a wiser man learns from the mistakes of others

    • @edxander7169
      @edxander7169 3 года назад +7

      🙏

    • @altobonifacio8936
      @altobonifacio8936 3 года назад +7

      True that

    • @anotherindividual5799
      @anotherindividual5799 3 года назад +28

      Smart man learns from his own mistakes. A wise man learns from the mistakes of others 😉👍🏼 but you get it lol

    • @Lemonysnicket201
      @Lemonysnicket201 3 года назад +1

      There is no spoon

    • @mopop999
      @mopop999 3 года назад

      A wister man learns from the mistakes of a man learns from the mistakes of others

  • @lopinionista9788
    @lopinionista9788 3 года назад +1903

    It is extremely difficult to have a meaningful conversation with someone nowadays, because people in general are scared to express themselves and their emotions. This, in large scale, is due to the excessive use of social media. When I go outside it is usual to see people staying on their phone, instead of talking. I mean, you have a person on front of you, and all you can do is stare at a screen. With this premises, how do you think people can even think to be in a relationship? Especially a durable one! The biggest advice that I can give to people is to cancel socials in its entirety. RUclips is still great, because there are tons of informative videos. But all the rest is pretty much awful, especially Tik Tok.

    • @sacha7202
      @sacha7202 3 года назад +31

      Facts

    • @peachteatina
      @peachteatina 3 года назад +44

      Yup!
      My last relationship, long distance but when we did hang out, he was on his phone too much. I’d bring it up and he’d get mad. Obviously that relationship ended.

    • @awakenedpennslyvanian5194
      @awakenedpennslyvanian5194 3 года назад

      ruclips.net/video/b_HCPC3lvM0/видео.html

    • @OnlyJerico
      @OnlyJerico 3 года назад +22

      I went out on a date back in hs and the girl just kept on using her phone, we didn't have any meaningful convo, I didn't say anything. It was so awkward I just wanted to get home.

    • @neo_aliaga
      @neo_aliaga 3 года назад +3

      And I lose time in TikTok on a daily basis lol

  • @adlantian6334
    @adlantian6334 2 года назад +238

    "The mutual goal is growth."
    THIS is the middle ground between redpills and man-haters. No one will ever be perfect. Whether you are single or in a relationship, whether you are a man, woman, nonbinary, gay, straight, or a flying purple people eater, there is always room to grow. You don't have to be perfect to be in a happy, mutually supportive relationship. You do have to be committed to growth, both individuallly AND together, or the relationship is doomed.

    • @shaddowmystwolf
      @shaddowmystwolf 2 года назад

      Mutual LT Relationships are dead, you absolute Useful Idiot. Why else do you think people have parted ways at such a huge volume in such a short duration of time? The issue is it takes a man and a woman to have said relationships; except in this day and age mostly just males and females around, very few men or women, just shitty entitled whiny stupid bitches. And there is the key: absense of men and women, instead filled to the brim of society with an epidemic of the worst generations of children that never grew up.

    • @steverempel8584
      @steverempel8584 2 года назад +12

      Is the flying purple people eater purple itself, or does it just eat purple people?

    • @raddropmu4001
      @raddropmu4001 2 года назад +7

      @@steverempel8584 asking the real questions

    • @saijeetdogra9360
      @saijeetdogra9360 2 года назад +1

      I identify as original lore version grimace.

  • @nailkash2347
    @nailkash2347 3 года назад +263

    I remember time when I was obsessed with a fact that I was still single and was desperate to find someone. I remember I was talking to my friend about this and he told me "You know, man, there are far more important things in life than the amount of girls you had". Years have past, but I still say this words to myself to keep my focus on important things.

    • @iliveinsideyourhouse3943
      @iliveinsideyourhouse3943 3 года назад +47

      You may not have a lover, but you sure as hell have a good friend!

    • @Dread873
      @Dread873 3 года назад +2

      @@iliveinsideyourhouse3943 agreed, this is it right here

    • @Gaze73
      @Gaze73 3 года назад +9

      It sucks though. All your ancestors have succesfully reproduced, literally billions of sub-90 IQ people get married and reproduce all the time, and yet here you are, forever alone despite your above average intelligence and decent personality. Makes you wonder what's wrong.

    • @iliveinsideyourhouse3943
      @iliveinsideyourhouse3943 3 года назад +1

      @@Gaze73
      I think I have low IQ and I'm alone most of the time, it's a lose-lose situation for me lol. Be grateful with your "above average intelligence", man. Perhaps you will find your lover soon enough, or maybe not. As long as we do our best to bettering ourselves, maybe it's get better, if it's doesn't, there are still other things that's makes us happy :)

    • @Gaze73
      @Gaze73 3 года назад

      ​@@iliveinsideyourhouse3943 Do an IQ test then. Low IQ people don't have much capacity for self-reflection. That's why they're generally happier and breed impulsively even if they have no money to raise kids properly. Super quick IQ test: do you prefer manual labor or working on a computer?

  • @concepttttt
    @concepttttt 3 года назад +886

    Truth is: you shouldn’t go into a relationship because of social pressure or because it “is the right thing to do”....
    You should do it because you want to, and because you can actually see a future with that person

    • @legoboy-ox2kx
      @legoboy-ox2kx 3 года назад +79

      The problem with waiting until you find somebody like that is you don't have the experience to actually have a good relationship with that person and they'll leave you for someone more experienced most of the time, especially in your 20s. That's the problem with his advice, most of the guys watching red pill videos are never going to even meet someone like that because they don't have the social skills or qualities to attract great women. It's not women's fault, but the problem is made worse by society's constant pressure for men to "man up".

    • @ogvelociraptor205
      @ogvelociraptor205 3 года назад +1

      Bingo!!!!

    • @concepttttt
      @concepttttt 3 года назад +5

      @@legoboy-ox2kx well I guess it just depends who you are :) for me I don’t really think that applies. I do think your right tho. Have a good one 🌍

    • @concepttttt
      @concepttttt 3 года назад

      @@ogvelociraptor205 bango!

    • @iliveinsideyourhouse3943
      @iliveinsideyourhouse3943 3 года назад +16

      @@legoboy-ox2kx
      That's why watching videos and gathering tips about relationships is essentially useless if you never actually put it into practice.

  • @PianoHits
    @PianoHits 3 года назад +2221

    In general humans are too self centred. Relationships usually come undone when you realise the idealism of a relationship isn't realistic. The cultures that have higher success rates are willing to accept the boundaries of tradition for the gain of lifetime companionship

    • @TheyWantMeGone69
      @TheyWantMeGone69 3 года назад +126

      I've come to the conclusion that human beings are narcisistic pieces of shit who think they're always right and don't like opposing opinions. No relationships sounds like a huge energy saver

    • @JK-vy8vh
      @JK-vy8vh 3 года назад +62

      Lol it’s just you’re neediness for certainty, weak af bro let go of everything she’s only yours for the moment and everyone you know and love will all be gone eventually. Live in the moment and appreciate it instead of being afraid of losing it.

    • @PianoHits
      @PianoHits 3 года назад +45

      @@JK-vy8vh haha nice try but I enjoy my independence. Think again about what you just wrote it's a self fulfilling prophecy seeking someone else to meet your needs

    • @JK-vy8vh
      @JK-vy8vh 3 года назад +7

      @@PianoHits wtf how does that apply to what I said.....

    • @PianoHits
      @PianoHits 3 года назад +32

      @@JK-vy8vh for someone who was apparently carefree at what they can't control they react quite fast , 🤔

  • @zachsilby4569
    @zachsilby4569 3 года назад +271

    I'm 19 and my last relationship was with a very shitty woman, she dumped me for a guy who's voice sounded nice (that's it, that's the reason). I went through a dark place in the past 3 years, almost went Red Pill halfway through but it never agreed with my worldview and who I am at my core.
    I view people as they exist as people and not as "man" or "woman", I believe in merit in the individual. This meant that I could never fully be Red Pilled, and you know what? It helped me realize that yes, *THAT* specific woman that I am happy dumped me, was a horrible example of dating. But they aren't all like that, and it taught me to be careful and hesitant before going into a relationship.
    So, I've been single for three years, and I've finally healed myself enough to realize that I'm no longer desperate for the attention, and just genuinely wish for the companionship while being alright with being by myself. I'm not sure what kind of self love this is, it's not "I love myself soooo much" happy shit, but it's more of a "You know what? I'm the only person who will be with me until I die, I better make due with that." kind of neutral about myself. I'm not overly excited that I'm me, but neither am I dreading my own existence.
    Right now, I do feel an ache in my core that I do want to date. I want the companionship and the romantic connection. I'm just trying to be logical and careful about who I choose to give my time to.

    • @aaroncalapre5980
      @aaroncalapre5980 3 года назад +13

      That's great man.
      I don't have any relationship experience but from my perspective on the idea of 'wanting a relationship but not desperately; and making due with yourself not because of extreme happiness or pride, but because it something a person should do for their wellbeing', seems like a logical and effective path for someone to take when it comes to the topic of relationships.
      Respect for not falling to red-pill and evaluating a person's qualities based on an individual and not the gender as a whole.

    • @zachsilby4569
      @zachsilby4569 3 года назад +9

      @@aaroncalapre5980 Might help that I'm an aspie, but I just dont see the point in holding grudges over stereotypes. Kinda bullshit if you ask me, plus, it means I know when someone's an asshole easier.

    • @Bongalized
      @Bongalized 3 года назад +18

      My man, you nailed it. Especially with that last paragraph. Stay strong brother, we'll all be in someone's arms eventually, just need patience.

    • @zachsilby4569
      @zachsilby4569 3 года назад +8

      @@Bongalized yeah it's like the last verse of Last to Know by Three Days Grace, went from "This was my first love" to "this was my *worst* love" as he realized it and healed.

    • @yasminacortesgomez5534
      @yasminacortesgomez5534 2 года назад +1

      You will be fine

  • @orbitalsatellite
    @orbitalsatellite 3 года назад +371

    It's a pretty rancid time to be getting into a relationship unless you meet someone is not addicted to social media. Even slightly addicted. Screw FaceBook, screw Twitter, screw Instagram, screw the age of "look at me!". There are good people out there. You'll meet them in hiking groups, libraries, dog walking parks, and other healthy and normal environments. Not clubs with women caked in make-up or men in Armani suits, or whatever the hell they wear these days. I personally love the relationship dynamics between nerd couples, like scientists, or any down-to-earth people. They enjoy alone time and never have to worry about their partner becoming insecure about it.

    • @ladydontekno
      @ladydontekno 3 года назад +12

      And then there’s me, the socially awkward nerd who also loves going to clubs 😊

    • @martinkobimbo8090
      @martinkobimbo8090 3 года назад +36

      Nailed it, people are looking for partners in the wrong places , guys like marrying girls they met in a party and wonder why they get divorced only for their assets to be taken away

    • @zacharylewis417
      @zacharylewis417 3 года назад +11

      Yea I see finding a relationship is tough in this social media world lol. I have Facebook and I am rarely on it. I get the odd look when I say I don't have Instagram, twitter or tiktok.

    • @yambaraffaella9775
      @yambaraffaella9775 3 года назад

      Totally agree with you

    • @tyreselynch6184
      @tyreselynch6184 3 года назад

      My cousin goes to dog walking parks an is one of the most toxic people that I know....but Amma take your word I try still

  • @TheSoundofTanay
    @TheSoundofTanay 3 года назад +519

    I am all for monogamy and serious, long-term relationships. People simply don't want to put in the work to better themselves (even when in a relationship) and they think 'new' people/relationship(s) will make them better. In my experience, when I am focused on my growth; I am able to give and receive the best kind of love.

    • @lecomtedeneuch9994
      @lecomtedeneuch9994 3 года назад +48

      OMG THIS THANK YOU !!! Whenever people are argumenting about monogamy about it getting stale and boring, it's just because they are individually boring. Foreshadowing themselves. Also people who jump from to 2 year relationship to another will never ever grow and will keep repeating the same mistakes until it is too late to go back.

    • @योगिताकेशवानी
      @योगिताकेशवानी 3 года назад +1

      Same dude same

    • @Mali-fm3rc
      @Mali-fm3rc 3 года назад +1

      This is beautiful

    • @jcivilis533
      @jcivilis533 3 года назад +26

      @@lecomtedeneuch9994 Exactly. I know a girl who complains to me that she ended all her proper relationships after five or six months because she got bored. However she's one of the most boring people I've ever met but she takes this out on other people, calling me and others boring people because she's fundamentally unable to sustain interesting conversations with other people, always turning the conversation to her own life which consists of watching series, doing fitness and her drama with her friends. I find that most relationships nowadays are boring in general, not because the people are unkind or not in love with each other but because there's never any growth, depth or character development in any of them. And then people still have the gall to complain that they cannot find a lasting relationship lol. It's not like an interesting person is going to search out a person who doesn't grow over the years and just entertain them for years on end when they're married.

    • @asiasthoughts
      @asiasthoughts 3 года назад +1

      I agree I've had the best relationships, and met some of the best people when I was just focusing on myself and being a good person more people should try that more.

  • @disneychec
    @disneychec 3 года назад +679

    I’m 26 and single, and honestly I feel I’m going to stay single for the rest of my life. But dude, the way you look at all this is amazing. I agree with 100% of it.

    • @faint3745
      @faint3745 3 года назад +43

      Recency bias, things change. The universe is in constant flux.

    • @franacha
      @franacha 3 года назад +2

      But at least have you had any?

    • @disneychec
      @disneychec 3 года назад +16

      @@franacha yup, two serious long term relationships and a few short non-serious ones.

    • @franacha
      @franacha 3 года назад +16

      ​@@disneychec Well that's something. You know what it is to be loved by a woman. That's a good thing

    • @XxSupernatural21xX
      @XxSupernatural21xX 3 года назад +75

      @@franacha Being loved by a woman isn't worth the problems it causes

  • @monk4ever
    @monk4ever 2 года назад +36

    Relationships are such a waste of time. Staying single has made me happier than ever.

  • @mattrodgers157
    @mattrodgers157 3 года назад +524

    Being single is great. I actually miss coming home to peace and quiet and having my time to myself. Then again I’m pretty introverted.

    • @SAMSARALIVEEEEEE
      @SAMSARALIVEEEEEE 3 года назад +63

      Being introverted is a gift.

    • @mrsrdrgz
      @mrsrdrgz 3 года назад +10

      Indeed.

    • @mattrodgers157
      @mattrodgers157 3 года назад +7

      @@SAMSARALIVEEEEEE agreed!

    • @Spladoinkal
      @Spladoinkal 3 года назад +16

      I'm very introverted and yet peace and quiet IS time with my wife. She's great!

    • @haretztj4682
      @haretztj4682 3 года назад +4

      Then you must’ve had an extroverted gf

  • @drakejdf
    @drakejdf 3 года назад +637

    I’m 53 I lost my wife Two years ago we were together for 35 years married for 14. People have changed for the worse I don’t see myself in a relationship ever again. I had a good run and now I’m just focusing on myself im my own best friend LOL.

    • @gogetaevans722
      @gogetaevans722 3 года назад +59

      Hey live ur best life, there really aren't any good girls now lol

    • @reecekyle6332
      @reecekyle6332 3 года назад +4

      @@emilia7350 you absolute donut they have been together since they were 14 ffs

    • @rsrs6959
      @rsrs6959 3 года назад +20

      Thank God for the beautiful 35 years and the 14 years of happy married life! You really are a very lucky man!

    • @canadian1233
      @canadian1233 3 года назад +5

      drakejdf : That is the best way to live. The vvomen who used to be like your wife, have long disappeared, replaced by angry/bitter females who only want to bring harm to you and your life. Trying to get into a relationship with a modern female is like trying to get into someplace that will torture you; - why do that to yourself?

    • @rsrs6959
      @rsrs6959 3 года назад +10

      @@canadian1233 I guess this is a global phenomena, our pa, grand pas and great grand pas were very lucky, that they lived in the good old times.

  • @degenjmartin9368
    @degenjmartin9368 3 года назад +218

    Just my own advice: Find people with the same core values as you, once you do. The little things won’t matter. Normally I find people whose values aren’t aligned tend to argue and fight about small things..🤷🏽‍♂️

    • @profannaty
      @profannaty 3 года назад +1

      Lol unrelated but another Michl fan! cool - and also I agree :p

    • @degenjmartin9368
      @degenjmartin9368 3 года назад +1

      @@profannaty much love!

    • @jayceemedrano8058
      @jayceemedrano8058 3 года назад +10

      Super agree with your statement. This is the reason why I dont settle for who is available & likes me back because I'm looking for a true-long term commitment.

    • @degenjmartin9368
      @degenjmartin9368 3 года назад +2

      @@jayceemedrano8058 you are absolutely right my friend!

    • @elfelon9465
      @elfelon9465 3 года назад +1

      Wtf are you michl??

  • @yungflo60
    @yungflo60 2 года назад +43

    I think you spelled out the reason nobody is trying anymore. "In order to get to a good relationship, you have to get through some shitty ones" well that's a whole lot of heartbreak and time spent. My dad is Twice divorced. My mom hasn't held a relationship since the divorce. The people who get to meet a forever partner are beyond lucky. I'll spare myself the heart ache personally

    • @jeremyvanb821
      @jeremyvanb821 Год назад +3

      That’s just life though. You have to go through shitty times to really appreciate the amazing times. That’s relationships, friendships, jobs, education. The sweet isn’t as sweet without some sour. Relationships fail, you’ll change jobs, friendships can turn bad but it seems silly to avoid experiences because they may not work out. I’m at the point now where I’m more into the experience, however long it lasts and take the lessons from that, good or bad, and make myself better.

    • @yungflo60
      @yungflo60 Год назад +2

      @@jeremyvanb821 as far as jobs and friends go I agree with you. When it comes to falling in love with someone intimately, it is the most intimate and private relationship you will ever have. They will know almost everything about you, and you them. Relationships have the potential for very high highs, but also very low lows. Me myself, I've never been a gambling man. I'm pretty happy and content with my life right now, and although that cap on happiness could go higher in a relationship, so could the cap on possible depression and sadness.

  • @KaMiKaZe4ever1337
    @KaMiKaZe4ever1337 3 года назад +142

    In my case I'm 27 and single because I'm tired of being in a relationship because the society tells me I should. I'm tired of the constant thought of marriage and kids being shoved down my throat. I'm single and I will be single until I find that one person that I can truly invest in. I've changed a lot in the past 2 years(physically and mentally) and unfortunately most girls that I meet tend to remind me of my old me. I guess the most important thing is learning to be happy with yourself. Once you do that(took me almost 27 years to do that), the pressure of being in a relationship is gone.

    • @kinolox
      @kinolox 3 года назад +5

      27 here and 100%same

    • @screwedupmystic2597
      @screwedupmystic2597 3 года назад +14

      26 here and single because I hate social media and EVERYONE is glued to their phones and snapchat. I'm hate going out with some one and they having to record and snap everything. Litterly 99% of people

    • @jamesbra4410
      @jamesbra4410 3 года назад +2

      Yeah once I really became successful and happy with myself then the insecurities started to fall away. I've never been happier now since I've been taking care of myself. Women of course take notice and I see them take notice when I would have otherwise been quick to engage now I really have little interest in any of that since I started to feel secure with who I am. Dating has been much better now and I have always been anxious but now that I've got older that has started to fade. I have never been one to have sex and generally get uncomfortable when women get too touchy so now I'm able to make it on my terms and keep it friendly and professional.

    • @jamesbra4410
      @jamesbra4410 3 года назад +1

      @Thanos I'm 28 and have spent most of my youth studying. Since 16 I have put school as a priority and have put exercise as my priority. Now it is different for different men and it is one of the big reasons why people don't reach their full potential. I generally have a low sex drive though so it is much easier for me than most to ignore women. So, I eat healthy, keep good hygiene, and stay fit so that I can be focused on my job. I am an engineer and work for GE. So my advice is to put studying first. Women as they get older will try to date men to raise their social status so you'll have a much easier time later in life if you work hard when you are young. Even now though, I have little interest in women and have become good at rejecting their advances. Of course women want a challenge so they don't get the hint, but women to me are nothing but competition so I have to make sure that I stay in control.

    • @screwedupmystic2597
      @screwedupmystic2597 3 года назад

      @Thanos that's true I agree

  • @douglassmendonca9587
    @douglassmendonca9587 3 года назад +159

    I couldn’t agree more with this, people are just afraid of getting hurt. It’s okay to be scared but you gotta be willing to trust yourself enough to be able to get through shit. We’re stronger than we think we are! I hope everyone here knows that they got this!

    • @dr.watson8880
      @dr.watson8880 3 года назад +6

      Feel free to place your hand on the stove. I’ve had done that too many times. I’m a 31 year old dude that had enough with the jokes.

    • @SAMSARALIVEEEEEE
      @SAMSARALIVEEEEEE 3 года назад +11

      It’s not that. Relationships are just boring because most women nowadays are robots. What do they bring?

    • @thepikminbrawler1746
      @thepikminbrawler1746 3 года назад

      Unrelated but I just really like the vibe of ur username and profile pic. Not to mention your comment adds to it

    • @chefboiardeeznutz9881
      @chefboiardeeznutz9881 3 года назад

      I believe you're right

    • @djjukeboxhero6491
      @djjukeboxhero6491 3 года назад +2

      Men have more to lose...equality is a myth.

  • @marcore4514
    @marcore4514 3 года назад +239

    I am 29 and I am single for 4 years now. I realised that I am better off by myself.
    everyone expects from you to find a partner, getting married and having children just because society dictates us to do it.
    I choose not to live that way and honestly, it feels good. And I like being different.

    • @josenieto2093
      @josenieto2093 3 года назад +24

      Preach man, same here 29 single for about 5 years, and honestly the way society tries to bubble everyone in the same bubble is bs, I’m happy like this and probably will be single forever.

    • @merlindacaylan3765
      @merlindacaylan3765 3 года назад +19

      Same here ! I'm 29 and 6 years single and counting 😂
      Same thoughts too. Everyone is trying to get into a relationship and get married because of society's expectation 🙄
      Loving my single life, i know what i want and i'm not gonna settle for less of what i deserve 😉
      Cheers to all happy singles out there ! 😁💕

    • @marcore4514
      @marcore4514 3 года назад +16

      @@merlindacaylan3765 yeah I always get asked if I got a girlfriend. like I am obligated to have one. I always told them I don't want a gf

    • @merlindacaylan3765
      @merlindacaylan3765 3 года назад +5

      @@marcore4514 exactly ! And everyone is asking when will i get married and have children 🤦🏻‍♀️😂 everyone is so worried but me 😂

    • @marcore4514
      @marcore4514 3 года назад +11

      @@merlindacaylan3765 True! They think you can only be happy if you have a partner. That's what they say to me. Having a partner and a family doesn't guarantee you to be happy 😂

  • @tommymarco
    @tommymarco 2 года назад +8

    these comments are amazing to read . really insightful on what we are all being subjected to . great to see so many free thinkers out there .

  • @bigsasquatch44
    @bigsasquatch44 3 года назад +480

    "Most guys have mommy issues, you just have to exploit them." - My coworker on the first day I worked with her 🙃

    • @arnabroy418
      @arnabroy418 3 года назад +89

      Wish you a happy work-life.😂

    • @azuresteel1941
      @azuresteel1941 3 года назад +11

      🙂

    • @filippavlakovic4478
      @filippavlakovic4478 3 года назад +52

      I'd kill myself if I ever have to work with her

    • @EnoI539
      @EnoI539 3 года назад +29

      A women are like that.

    • @AKFakuade
      @AKFakuade 3 года назад +3

      ​@@EnoI539 are we watching the same video? He was literally denouncing the exact same thing that you were saying...

  • @boostio-xg4zg
    @boostio-xg4zg 3 года назад +339

    so many dudes will be like dang bro, you a virgin, or dang you never been in a relationship, but tbh if I don't see marriage with someone why even bother?

    • @adolfchangchrist7975
      @adolfchangchrist7975 3 года назад +35

      Depends if you value the experience of a relationship. There isn't really intrinsically any point to a lot of things but if you want the memories then there is a point. Some people like having sex and companionship but can't stand children. It's all personal preference.

    • @DailyThingsInLife
      @DailyThingsInLife 3 года назад +19

      I would just to pump and dump

    • @icedynamite1560
      @icedynamite1560 3 года назад +1

      @@adolfchangchrist7975 exactly lol, like sometimes it can give you experience and get the bumps and bruises out the way so that you can find that special someone

    • @adolfchangchrist7975
      @adolfchangchrist7975 3 года назад +19

      @@icedynamite1560 Well I would debate the idea of finding someone special. Finding someone who can be tolerated who won't cheat or constantly threaten to leave is rare enough nevermind someone special.

    • @prouddegenerates9056
      @prouddegenerates9056 3 года назад +1

      Agreed

  • @noahnakanishi5017
    @noahnakanishi5017 3 года назад +287

    I’m from Japan, and it sucks dating over here too.. there’s a culture that kinda makes fun of people that takes relationships seriously, and there’s a even a term for that type of ppl “重い” which means heavy/too much. I honestly regret dating this girl when I wasn’t sure how serious she was towards a relationship, and I started to realize that her affection and love dwindled away as mine kept going stronger. And she used this term against me. I was the one who dumped her but it sucks that I fall in love with someone and I have to dump them. Just aiming for the best and investing on myself for me now🙆‍♂️

    • @noahnakanishi5017
      @noahnakanishi5017 3 года назад +14

      Might’ve been off topic lol but I agree with alotta ppl in this comment section that says dating sucks haha but I guess the worst happens to the best of us for a reason, to get us stronger and happier🙏

    • @luciatat4084
      @luciatat4084 2 года назад +16

      Oh...it’s really sad that this ideea even exists! Authentic love is one of the most beautiful things...the world is loosing it.

    • @ErickeTR
      @ErickeTR 2 года назад +11

      @@noahnakanishi5017 in Brazil we have it too. In portuguese we call it "grudento", "sticky". My last relationship lasted for three years and I thought it would be THE one. It started in High School. I was in love with a friend for years before we started dating. Eventually, we ended up together and for me it was the best time of my life, it was like a dream. But we had different mentalities as to what relationships should be. I am the kind of person that believes in dialogue, making it work, commitment and fixing things. She was the kind of person that believes that "people come and go". And this led to our break up. I knew she was unhappy with me and let her go. But now I don't see myself in a relationship ever again, because it all seems to be so pointless... I mean, if we can be changing people all the time like we change clothes, what's the point of it?

    • @luciatat4084
      @luciatat4084 2 года назад +5

      @@ErickeTR I understand your dissapointment, but I believe you will find “the one” one day. Don’t give up to your hope, don’t change the way you think . You believe in true love, you will find it!

    • @GianniStorti
      @GianniStorti 2 года назад +6

      @@ErickeTR I've had a similar experience: I was the one asking for a dialogue, beliving in "fixing" things.. but for her it was hard to open up. Things faded slowly and we broke up.
      It was really hard for me and the scar is still there.. but the thing is you can always see the lesson behind any experience. We can crave on things, feelings and overload relationship of expectations, but that's what kills them.
      The "scars" will always be there, each and everyone, to remember us every experience. If you don't "scratch" them, they'll serve you well for the rest of your life. If you keep scratching, to loop the memory in your head, they'll become your demons.
      Many of us have been rised to belive in "things/love last forever".. nothing's forever, yet it doesn't mean we can't love! For we could love even more.
      The hard thing I think is to get free from (specific) desires and social schemes, so that you can realize yourself and be ready for everything that will come.
      If you stick on "I'll never be in a relationship never again" you're preventing your future to realize, and chances are you'll end up in a relation sooner than you think with the same attitude you had in the previous one.
      The thing I've learned about love is that you can't control it, as hard as it could sound. This doesn't mean the future will be all about disposable relations, polyamory etc. on the countrary, you can realize which kind of relation will suit you best. If you like to dialogue and open up with your partner, you'll surely find someone like you.
      Focusing on yourself doesn't mean you have to be self-centric, on the countrary it means to get in touch with your inner self, with your passions, arts, sports and skills. Letting go the "control" you crave on things doesn't mean you have to live in apathy, for it could even elevate the gratitude for the things will happen to you - imho a good exercise for this is to start cultivating something.
      The best advice I could give you - and everyone else - is to get rid of psycological predatory media (tv, socials, ..) and get away from toxic "places" as soon as you can.
      It's an hard path, but definitely we can all make it!

  • @librasky
    @librasky Год назад +19

    Was married 17 years , found out she was with ALL of her coworkers
    She divorced me took my kids , house , cars , $
    I never thought this would happen to me
    I thought because I loved my wife I was safe
    I was wrong !!!

    • @VeniVidiVandaliAuz
      @VeniVidiVandaliAuz Год назад

      How embarrassing...

    • @jeahavvalentin980
      @jeahavvalentin980 10 месяцев назад

      Thank God I'm not in your shoes😅😂

    • @OVORICK1
      @OVORICK1 5 месяцев назад

      Never trusting a woman I hear to much stories like this one

    • @epieremy9158
      @epieremy9158 3 дня назад

      Did you marry another girl?

  • @itsez1129
    @itsez1129 3 года назад +817

    I'm 25 and I never had a relationship...
    Life is good

    • @EnoI539
      @EnoI539 3 года назад +61

      Agree been single since 18

    • @navidmohabbat9427
      @navidmohabbat9427 3 года назад +19

      I wish i had your place.you never taste narcissistic relationship.

    • @elasticharmony
      @elasticharmony 3 года назад +28

      I still go for a relationship, at least friends; you get your testosterone levels up and hit the gym then women are much less potent. I don't have many serious problem here, and am also possessive. This is brainwashing and men have become to lenient, the only girl friend I ever broke up with was one I really didn't want. I just had three at one time and not club girls but descent.
      Being single I believe is more about your soul were you are saving yourself from the many impure and evil ones out there but not the raw material, ...

    • @feferosette
      @feferosette 3 года назад

      🙂👍

    • @mayhamman6013
      @mayhamman6013 3 года назад +29

      I'm 20 and haven't had one. I get sad sometimes but when I do I remind myself that putting me first is key

  • @jtorres5381
    @jtorres5381 3 года назад +188

    No shame in it brother. I've been dumped in all my relationships and I'm 40. This isn't recent, this behavior has been around since the 60s 70s. Its just gotten worse, and today its so obvious because we all have a computer in our hands, where we can share all our stories with the world.

    • @jtorres5381
      @jtorres5381 3 года назад +25

      It is a men vs women thing but it shouldn't be.
      Its more of a, I'm only gonna worry about me and f everyone else!" attitude that has been praised. No more religion, conservativism, nor being raised correctly. Nobody is raised in 2 parent households, and children are used as pawns by the courts and gov. to get easy prizes for the next dummies to play the game.
      People are never the same on year 10, than on day 1 when they met. Nor should they be. I just think we have f d up civilization and humanism with all the advances we have made in last 100 to 150 yrs. And we are trying to adjust and its gonna take another 500,000 yrs!

    • @astroot6629
      @astroot6629 3 года назад +3

      This is put best!!!

    • @VD-cc4hx
      @VD-cc4hx 3 года назад

      @@jtorres5381 no way that you are 40 when you post yourself playing fortnite

    • @dalla-think3765
      @dalla-think3765 3 года назад

      @@VD-cc4hx the best mario kart player is 66 ...

    • @jtorres5381
      @jtorres5381 3 года назад +3

      @@VD-cc4hx i was 37 when I posted that, I never played BR, I was an OG on save the world and bought the early edition when it first came out in 2017. Been gaming since 85. Suck at shooters and mostly play sports games. Yes 40 yr olds love gaming. You're never too old to be a kid. I also have 3 jobs and pay bills. But what I will never have is a wife. I'll take that to the grave! But I will maybe have kids one day. Cheers!👍

  • @oleathiajones6310
    @oleathiajones6310 3 года назад +104

    This young man is proof that Wisdom has no age.

  • @lewdogzombies
    @lewdogzombies Год назад +12

    I’m 21 and have never been in a relationship and I want to stay that way. Life is a lot more chill as a single person without the drama and BS of relationships

    • @prettyteeth
      @prettyteeth 9 месяцев назад +2

      Youll never have more peace and self growth. Trust me you will love it.

    • @OVORICK1
      @OVORICK1 5 месяцев назад +1

      I'm 23 years old making $13k being single is so much fun and peaceful

    • @ARJIT-lf3po
      @ARJIT-lf3po 5 месяцев назад

      yes i agree, i am nihilist so no one can feed me the same bs of purpose of reproduction​@@OVORICK1

  • @keisimmons
    @keisimmons 3 года назад +768

    I WAS WAITING FOR THIS

    • @ColeHastings
      @ColeHastings  3 года назад +20

      Haha love it

    • @lfabio.n
      @lfabio.n 3 года назад +7

      It took me sometime to watch this video but I agree with everything he said, by complaining the opposite gender playing the victim people fall in the trap of doing the same
      Everyone has issues, it doesn't mean you should accept to be with a f*d up person

    • @JamezJN007
      @JamezJN007 3 года назад +1

      Persona 3?

    • @doomera5911
      @doomera5911 3 года назад

      Oh shit it's Kei from Twitch

  • @filippavlakovic4478
    @filippavlakovic4478 3 года назад +341

    Story of my life:
    "Why are you still single at 25?"
    "I want to get my life together first plus I'm not ready yet and don't want to rush into any kind of commitment"
    "You're so weak"

    • @unstablerupture6983
      @unstablerupture6983 3 года назад +62

      Man fuck people that say that.
      You just keep what you're doing

    • @filippavlakovic4478
      @filippavlakovic4478 3 года назад +62

      @_jeff _ am I late somewhere? Should I succumb to society's pressure and get married to someone I don't even like before turning 30 just because "everyone does it" and just so I'm not perceived as "weak"? I don't think so..

    • @tkraid2575
      @tkraid2575 3 года назад +8

      Don't feel so worried about it, mate. Relationships are a serious thing, and it should be done properly with the person who shares the same values as you. Most relationships today rush on commitment under the high of lust, only to get disillusioned by the realities of being together: taking care of the kids, sharing responsibilities, etc. which are all difficult if your partner doesn't have the right attitude.

    • @dghvdhfhhb6405
      @dghvdhfhhb6405 3 года назад +12

      People expect you to get your shit together & live a full life by your mid-late 20s when it doesn’t work that way, And when you reach 30 you deal with divorce & debt etc, Should always take your time & enjoy the process

    • @deviousj5868
      @deviousj5868 3 года назад +2

      Bruh try being in your 30's and being single. It's wayy worse. There are extreme expectations at that time. "Why aren't you married? Why don't you have kids?" It's always that.

  • @RobertoBlake
    @RobertoBlake 3 года назад +512

    A little heartache to be had is a fair price to pay to live your life as you choose.

    • @Deport_All_nonWhites
      @Deport_All_nonWhites 3 года назад +10

      Utter narcissism and cope.

    • @dzvw
      @dzvw 3 года назад +27

      Yeah, we all need to go through the divorce courts at least once in our life.
      Being forced to pay alimony and child support while only allowed to see your kids once a week builds character, you know.

    • @DayanTheAbyss
      @DayanTheAbyss 3 года назад +4

      @@dzvw facts

    • @ArtisChronicles
      @ArtisChronicles 3 года назад +2

      Nah. That's full cope. You could always choose that, but your conditioning when you're young doesn't allow you to think that's even an option.

    • @ArtisChronicles
      @ArtisChronicles 3 года назад +2

      @@dzvw the government is the one that really benefits.

  • @PGSL-r5n
    @PGSL-r5n 2 года назад +63

    I've always been a traditionist when it comes to dating, and believe in a 50 / 50 partnership relationship. Some of my elderlly customers has spoken of how deformed society is today. Everything it seems is completely broken and aimed at consumism. Today, it is very rare to have a conversation with someone who is free thinking and isn't glued to social media or the TV. It's everyone for themselves and if you achieve something amazing you'll experience envy and jealously and if you don't your ridicured in a bad manor. There should be places designed for men and women to meet up, and to learn new skills from one an other instead of places that promote intensive drinking, TV and eating. Also house and rents should be designed for one income family instead of two. But what do I know, cities are dreadful places to live if you cannot find an ideal partner

    • @tommymarco
      @tommymarco 2 года назад +2

      you know quite a bit bro . i like the way you see things .

    • @sethjoseph8152
      @sethjoseph8152 2 года назад +1

      Facts!

    • @dedasalmeida9047
      @dedasalmeida9047 Год назад

      You can't be traditionalist and believe in 50/50 that's a contradiction
      50/50 implies selfishness, "I did my part now you do yours", it should be 100/100 from both

  • @UnknownUser_627
    @UnknownUser_627 3 года назад +415

    See, I'm nineteen and I don't want to miss this part of my life while I'm still young. I'd love to create a connection with someone and incorporate them as a part of my life for a very long time, but dating just doesn't seem to be worth it anymore for so many reasons. I have unrealistic expectations, yes, but I can compromise. Problem is, no matter how much I may change/fluctuate my standards, there's a high possibility that I'll still get cheated on, or will just never find the right person or be unhappy. It seems nowadays that if you want a serious relationship instead of a partner that lasts a few months mostly, you have to be more lucky than ever, even with the accessibility the internet provides. Tough times.

    • @Sacred_Lui2
      @Sacred_Lui2 3 года назад +39

      The hardest part is trying to maintain the relationship for more than a year cuz we’re scared of what’s going to happen to eachother

    • @pizzacrust7029
      @pizzacrust7029 3 года назад +31

      I have a similar feeling of wanting something long term that is worthwhile and feels impactful and I also have very high expectations in a relationship. I’ve gone into relationships with this mindset and it doesn’t end well. What could blossom into a longer relationship is blocked by expectations. If you can learn to go into a relationship with a mindset of enjoying the experience of being close to another person and having fun and sharing moments together the relationship will be much more healthy and could lead to something bigger. Or it might not and you will get your heartbroken, but those moments you had together were still beautiful but being together any longer just isn’t in the cards. My last “relationship” was ruined by the fact that I couldn’t not look into the future but had I calmed my mind down and enjoyed what was happening at that time I think things would’ve gone much better. Any relationship is a gamble but it’s a pretty fun gamble while it lasts. If you read this far I’d say just live for the experience and try not to think too much into it because that will drive you crazy. Good luck on your journey! Relationships are a wonderful journey not a destination!

    • @ArtisChronicles
      @ArtisChronicles 3 года назад +10

      I won't lie to you, the longest relationship I had was a month long. That wasn't even recent. That was a long time ago by now, somewhere along the lines of 20 years ago. Things didn't seem quite so bad at that time either, but now they certainly do.
      It's still possible to find a good relationship, but it'll be extremely rare. Also no matter how unrealistic you think your expectations may be, never forget that yours are unlikely to be the most unrealistic expectations you'll ever encounter.

    • @sunbro7853
      @sunbro7853 3 года назад +8

      @@ArtisChronicles
      🙋 those of us with good relationships do exist! I asked her out 3 years ago and now we’re expecting our first child.
      We talked a lot about we wanted for our children, (what I’d like for mine and she hers) the state of of he culture, the nature of man, nature etc. We were/are pretty divorced from society’s standards though.

    • @tomgee8211
      @tomgee8211 2 года назад +2

      Get involved in a Church community

  • @GutsyTv69
    @GutsyTv69 3 года назад +88

    Im 23 still single never dated because of low self esteem wasted 7 years on depression involving various incidents. But this helped me grow to understand as a man i cannot play victim because people all have their own problems and the world doesn't revolve around me so its me who needs to stand up and move on. Now im learning art wanting to be an illustrator amd working out now im a little happy. Now again im learning that being happy with yourself and being happy alone is entirely two different thing. Im a little bit happy with myself now but still a long way to go but iam not happy being alone.

    • @couch_philosoph3325
      @couch_philosoph3325 3 года назад +8

      We are social creatures. It's normal to need other people for social needs. But it is also important to be happy with oneself. My heart goes out to you, i dealt eithd epression for like 10 years. And now for a long time now i have been truly happy. I am still in the middle of my life, but i am just so happy to live in the now. I wish this feeling to you and to everyone. I never knew i could appreciate life so much

    • @Discaptured
      @Discaptured 3 года назад +1

      Everything happens FOR you, and not TO you. All I gotta say

    • @anewlife5846
      @anewlife5846 3 года назад +6

      @@couch_philosoph3325 No, this is just to fool people to make them stand in herd.
      Stay single and happiness will blossom from within. If happiness is not from within but dependent on the externalities or objectivity of anything, that is not happiness but gratification of possession.
      My grand uncle, my two aunts and now me - all single and childfree for life.😇

    • @couch_philosoph3325
      @couch_philosoph3325 3 года назад +1

      @@anewlife5846 your point does not invalidate mine. You still are a social creature, you just get your social needs met by your family and maybe friends. Because you have been talking about aunt and uncle in your comment. The only way you would know if you could be happy just by yourself is if you never talk to anyone ever again. Also in my comment i wasn't even talking about children

    • @anewlife5846
      @anewlife5846 3 года назад +1

      @@couch_philosoph3325 My aunts and uncle are in different countries and so am I, my reference to them was merely to say that it is not only this generation that steps away from family life but there are plenty from previous generations as well.
      I am a recluse and never had any friend in my life as being an introvert, I never felt to associate with any other human for that matter.
      I am glad for you as well that you are blissful and content from within but humans are not social or else this world would not have been made to suffer from humans caused agonies onto others.

  • @amandaspaintinglessons9908
    @amandaspaintinglessons9908 3 года назад +1881

    I am almost 37. There are a lot of people in their 20's in the comments and I just want to tell you there is no rush!! It's ok to be single! You guys (and girls) are going to keep growing and learning about yourselves, and healing any issues you had while as a kid/teenager. I know it seems like when we are in our 20's we feel like we need everything right then and there but life is truly a marathon not a sprint. If you find someone great! But don't feel pressure to be with someone. Or to have a relationship by a certain age. They will find you when you are ready, and I think working on your self-love is the best thing you can do to attract a great person.

    • @Terron-de-pimienta
      @Terron-de-pimienta 3 года назад +149

      A lot of people just want a partner because they want to know how is to feel loved and can love in return.
      Not all the families give you the oportunity to know these feelings in childhood.

    • @Kairineesan
      @Kairineesan 3 года назад +11

      This is so true.

    • @grindcorejoe4485
      @grindcorejoe4485 3 года назад +22

      Meow

    • @LethalByChoice
      @LethalByChoice 3 года назад +88

      @@Terron-de-pimienta A relationship 9 times out of 10 doesn't and can't fill that void your parents failed to filled, you HAVE to be at peace with that void from your childhood or fill it with other means besides a relationship, because If you expect a relationship to fill that void or try to make it do as such itwill only result in your disappointment and the relationship most likely won't work out. You HAVE to be satisfied with yourself, your feelings, get rid of leftover baggage, and your past otherwise it most likely will prevent you from having a great relationship long term.

    • @woknwerk3293
      @woknwerk3293 3 года назад +16

      I get the vibe the 20 somethings who didn’t have a relationship yet are more bitter than anything

  • @privateequityguy
    @privateequityguy 3 года назад +28

    *“If you don't design your own life plan, chances are you'll fall into someone else's plan. And guess what they have planned for you? Not much.” - Jim Rohn*

    • @DaleGribble1
      @DaleGribble1 Год назад

      That is a great quote.
      I'm on an interesting life path and most people I meet are confusing.
      It's like they are wandering through the forest in a blindfold, but yet so certain of themselves.

  • @dananana1104
    @dananana1104 3 года назад +136

    I don’t get why being single is seen as a sad thing, “lacking” something. I’m 26, been single for 2 years after spending 9 years in a relationship that in the last years was extremely toxic for my mental health, and i’ve never felt more strong and complete than i do now. The only thing to do is stay true to ourselves. If in my journey i happen to find someone, cool. Otherwise, i’m not going to beg for validation nor compromise my life just so i can say that i have someone next to me.

    • @I_Am_The_Social_Reject
      @I_Am_The_Social_Reject 3 года назад

      All you do is treat relationships as toxic. And that's toxic. Being fine being single might be okay with you, but for most, it sucks. I don't want toxic relationships, but being single isn't exactly great either

    • @mrknarf4438
      @mrknarf4438 3 года назад +18

      @@I_Am_The_Social_Reject if being single isn't great for you, you may want to re-evaluate your life. You won't find what you're missing in anyone else.

    • @I_Am_The_Social_Reject
      @I_Am_The_Social_Reject 3 года назад +1

      @@mrknarf4438 Did I say happiness lies solely in the other? Or could you possibly think maybe having someone in your life makes things better? That kind of thinking is why no one looks for a partner anymore. Just a fuck buddy or girl on the side of their life lol. Only focusing on you. And that's good to avoid toxicity and getting hurt. Not for finding a life mate.

    • @dragon-kun199
      @dragon-kun199 3 года назад +2

      I generally can't take being alone with my thoughts. It's suffocating. I want someone with me throughout my life so I don't have existential crisises when I'm alone by myself. A relationship is necessary for my development since being alone makes me a little nihilistic which I want to avoid. But a relationship wouldn't allow me to nihilistic, so I would much rather it happen then not. And nihilism is not inherently bad, just when it inclines you towards suicidal thoughts, it gets exhausting to have that mindset.

    • @blackjetski555
      @blackjetski555 3 года назад +2

      I completely agree. One day being single won't been seen as negative, as the idea of it being a genuine life choice has gained a lot of traction in the past few decades. Compared to the 1950s when it was expected everyone would get married.
      I'm 38, always been single and trust me, as you age you worry about it less and less to the point you just enjoy concentrating on other things and barely think about 'status' or what others may think. To be honest, what people really need isn't relationships or money, but a 'focus'. Whether that IS a relationship, or a strong social circle, or a particular career, or just an interest that you want to get better and better at. People just need their own thing(s) to keep their mind active and fulfilled, and grow in whatever way they wish to.

  • @mitchelljack1590
    @mitchelljack1590 3 года назад +145

    Something I’ve noticed is that after a breakup I do everything possible to get my mental health back to a healthy place… diet, exercise, finding a purpose, setting goals, therapy… I dive into these things completely… then I’m feeling great… find the girl I think I’d want to marry… and slowly all of that effort I had put into myself, starts getting put into her… and my mental health suffers drastically… and therefore the relationship…. And I’m back to thinking, how did I fuck this up again

    • @yasminacortesgomez5534
      @yasminacortesgomez5534 2 года назад +6

      Hi can we will be friends

    • @GG_Edify
      @GG_Edify 2 года назад +2

      @@yasminacortesgomez5534 let me rephrase it for you with correct grammar.
      Can we be friends? Also his answer is probably no. Feel sorry for you. 💔

    • @_mtrk_msk9813
      @_mtrk_msk9813 2 года назад +9

      My first question is.. Is this girl you are with, giving you the Same effort you give to her? Because this happened to my too, and the problem in this was the give and take. When their is no Balance then you suffer and lose your self.

    • @katiez688
      @katiez688 Год назад

      You have to find balance. I recommend finding a partner who is into health and fitness. That way eating healthy and working out can be hobbies you share or encourage each other to pursue. Men who marry live longer and a big reason is because a lot of men find a partner who encourages them to keep up with their health.

    • @rgn87654
      @rgn87654 Год назад +1

      I noticed the same things. I did it four times before I was like, I'm done. I like my life now. I realize, if I'm honest with myself, I'll know what I want. I realized I only wanted a gf/wife because it was the norm. I decided I don't care, which is why all my relationships never worked out. I was honest and realized that spending time by myself was when I was happiest. It's not for everyone. Some people prefer to be social. Other don't.

  • @NickWhite
    @NickWhite 3 года назад +572

    morgan be like “this dude clearly wants me back”

  • @dboysniper2254
    @dboysniper2254 3 года назад +11

    That’s a great outlook after getting your heart broken. My heart was extremely broken after my last relationship, the amount of life lessons that I learned was incredibly, after realizing I had to change my life around, I feel so much better then I ever have. It sucks in the moment of being heart broken but wow the stuff you learn is incredible

  • @SilentClouds
    @SilentClouds 3 года назад +50

    I absolutely agree with the lack of masculine /feminine energy. People are loosing touch with themselves which makes everyone unhappy and out of place.

    • @denkerbosu3551
      @denkerbosu3551 2 года назад +2

      If you say a man is not manly it's just an insult to the man.
      If you say a woman lacks womanly attributes, it's the patriarchy putting all women down.

  • @jonastvedt9390
    @jonastvedt9390 3 года назад +93

    I can totally relate to what you're saying here. I really though that I watched these red pill videos with a grain of salt but I realised that they were subconsciously changing the way I viewed women and what I thought was expected of men, to where I just became bitter. Emotionally unavailable men are not 'alpha'.

    • @Outpolecat5278
      @Outpolecat5278 3 года назад +10

      Same here, I recently stopped all consumption of that content.

    • @JeffCaplan313
      @JeffCaplan313 3 года назад +4

      Take the dog pill next. It's a doozy. 🐶

    • @rudy1999
      @rudy1999 3 года назад

      @@real_path Ahh, a fellow Latvian chick.

    • @marcus3672
      @marcus3672 3 года назад +2

      Congrats Mr. Simp. Regress back and repeat the same mistake. Then perhaps you will learn a good lesson.

  • @jpskillet2902
    @jpskillet2902 3 года назад +155

    My father used to say something along the lines of “Most men look for a woman to love them, and end up miserable. Few look for the woman to help them learn how to love.”

    • @Thank-u-so-much-for-everything
      @Thank-u-so-much-for-everything 2 года назад +2

      Few look for the woman to help them learn how to love.”...................😭

    • @angryyoungman66
      @angryyoungman66 2 года назад

      Most men are emotionally weak , why look for a women in the first place you don't have to .

    • @tommymarco
      @tommymarco 2 года назад +1

      your father is a wise man .

    • @Thank-u-so-much-for-everything
      @Thank-u-so-much-for-everything 2 года назад +1

      @@tommymarco like very wise man we don't really hate that kind of father........
      how lucky you are

    • @tommymarco
      @tommymarco 2 года назад +1

      @@Thank-u-so-much-for-everything lucky indeed . when i read it today . made perfect sense .

  • @spartanajax1831
    @spartanajax1831 2 года назад +11

    I love how genuine and non-bullshitty you are. Most of these RUclipsrs like redpill etc just take advantage of peoples insecurities to get views, and so many channels copy this same style of manipulation, it's really just complete bullshit and I always find myself cringing listening to anything like that. But you are actually genuine and I feel like I definitely agree with so much you said here and other videos, like I was thinking about it and you perfected the concept. You're smart man, wish you the best of luck in your journey on self improvement, as well as anyone who reads this.

  • @timmorakinyo9529
    @timmorakinyo9529 3 года назад +153

    The best relationship is a relationship you have with yourself first. I have been with my wife for 14year now and is been a great because we allow ourselves to be who we are as individuals( give each other freedom to be ourselves without the need to fit into some frame) and treat one-and-another with honour/respect as separate souls on a journey having human experience through our separate bodies, no expectations or projecting one should make other happy instead uplift our consciousness/awareness to be present with every moment and to spend time alone, cultivate better relationships oneself.

    • @Loloswaghetto
      @Loloswaghetto 2 года назад +2

      This 100%

    • @jamesgavin6171
      @jamesgavin6171 2 года назад +1

      Does that freedom also include her seeing other guys if she ever wanted to and where you have no problem with that?

    • @lenengquist592
      @lenengquist592 2 года назад

      Yes, I agree with this.

    • @aestheticallypleasingaesth8941
      @aestheticallypleasingaesth8941 2 года назад +8

      @@jamesgavin6171 Wow. Someone’s neurotic and cynical. Let me tell you this, that perspective is not the only one that exists. How could you automatically assume that that could most likely happen? I’m sure he/she has the self respect to not be okay even if it does happen. Freedom does not mean seeing other guys and being flirty with other guys. You completely missed the point.

  • @musclehead1992
    @musclehead1992 3 года назад +57

    28 and single. I was in a 4 year long term relationship… been single 3 years now and I love it. I don’t need or desire a relationship.
    I’ll stay single for ever. I’m aromantic.

    • @denkerbosu3551
      @denkerbosu3551 2 года назад +6

      No need for labels. You are your own person and should focus on bettering yourself and what makes you happy.
      That's all.

    • @bonkersdonkers7381
      @bonkersdonkers7381 2 года назад +3

      28 and single my whole life. I do desire a relationship, but through meditation and self reflection, I now see that desire as a source of suffering. I’m learning to let it go.
      It really felt like I went through the 7 stages of grief when I did this. Now, I’m at peace.

    • @alt1f4
      @alt1f4 2 года назад

      @@bonkersdonkers7381 why my guy? You will be a Virgin forever? Really? I'm sad for you 😥

    • @bonkersdonkers7381
      @bonkersdonkers7381 2 года назад +3

      @@alt1f4 yeah, I was too. But, desire is the source of suffering. If I learn to distance myself from this desire, I will be free of suffering.

    • @bonkersdonkers7381
      @bonkersdonkers7381 2 года назад +1

      @@alt1f4 yeah, I was too. But, desire is the source of suffering. If I learn to distance myself from this desire, I will be free of suffering.

  • @Jiggonomics
    @Jiggonomics 3 года назад +37

    Yo you're GOATed for this. This video is truly amazing and shows why you stand out as a content creator. You don't let people put you in a box, such as red pill content, or self improvement content. I feel like you're just a genuine person speaking your mind in a concise and well edited way

    • @ColeHastings
      @ColeHastings  3 года назад +5

      Thank you so much. Yeah I really just try to speak about what I believe in and what i've experienced

    • @Jiggonomics
      @Jiggonomics 3 года назад

      @@ColeHastings what you said in this video reminds me of this short Jiraiya speech. I would just type it all in, but it hits a lot harder when you hear it
      ruclips.net/video/DWzjnjGqOco/видео.html

  • @Roseveins
    @Roseveins 2 года назад +7

    There is so much garbage on the internet, I didn't notice until I got out of this last relationship. It sucks because we all have to make mistakes to learn but social media is just not the place to get good advice.

  • @LivingALifeOfAbundance
    @LivingALifeOfAbundance 3 года назад +114

    Once upon a time a man asked a beautiful woman to marry him.
    She said, "No."
    And he lived happily ever after.

    • @pesomistic7656
      @pesomistic7656 2 года назад +1

      bcuz She was a creeeeeeeeeam gobler

  • @daryalightning
    @daryalightning 3 года назад +383

    Dude, I am single at 26, but I feel less and less worried about it. The planet is overcrowded as it is... If I meet the right person - cool, but I won't force a relationship just for the sake of the social status (plus, being in control of your life feels awesome)

  • @parkerrish9024
    @parkerrish9024 3 года назад +81

    Me and my wife definately agree with you. We were a nice christian couple and we don't live the way the world does. We deliberately act differently than most people in relationships and we respect each other. I'm 29 but I've been married and todeger with her for 8 years. I see couples all the time that shy away from being committed. Now a days people sleep with each other on the first couple of dates and have no intention of marriage or commitment. It scares them. But that's the reason it will never work either. You have to embrace commitment and find someone who believes similarly. Sorry if this is offensive I feel really passionate about this and it upsets me to see so many people struggle. Dating sucks lol

    • @parkerrish9024
      @parkerrish9024 3 года назад +17

      Best advice for searching for a legit woman. Never play dating as a game. 2. Be in a relationship for a distinct up front and honest purpose. (When I got together with my wife I let her know I intend to one day marry and I don't play games with dating and my heart). She thought and felt the same way. 3. Always do yh right thing regardless of how immature the woman may be. If she is full of crap and playing games she doesn't deserve you. Move on and don't keep something going that is toxic

    • @JeffCaplan313
      @JeffCaplan313 3 года назад +6

      "Treat me like a King and I'll treat you like my Queen. But if you want to play the game, then I'll show you how it's played."

    • @sadhu7191
      @sadhu7191 3 года назад +3

      After we colonize 3 planets then what? Whats the end goal? I am not a animal breeding out of fear of extinction

    • @Idk88-j2m
      @Idk88-j2m 3 года назад +4

      Marriage doesn’t equal commitment it’s just a peace of paper and I’m not trying to sound ignorant but u can go 20 plus years in a relationship without getting married and still be committed

    • @LethalByChoice
      @LethalByChoice 3 года назад +2

      @@Idk88-j2m Facts

  • @bullet-sm5gd
    @bullet-sm5gd 2 года назад +22

    I’m 20 and never had a relationship ever and all the females I’ve talked to I realize what I’m doing wrong social media and porn are such destructive things for your health

    • @ragnarrlobrok244
      @ragnarrlobrok244 2 года назад +4

      porn ? social ? the problem is women have all the power, you'll realize that with age

    • @bullet-sm5gd
      @bullet-sm5gd 2 года назад +1

      @@ragnarrlobrok244 lmao not everyone wants to put pussy on a pedestal u seem like one of those guys who can't tell your girl no

    • @b0rt119
      @b0rt119 2 года назад +1

      @@ragnarrlobrok244 Can you elaborate? In my opinion they only have as much power over you as you let them, but im curious about your view

    • @ragnarrlobrok244
      @ragnarrlobrok244 2 года назад

      @@b0rt119 I mean that if you want to fuck for free they have all the power, if you marry one they have all the power... they can divorce you at any time getting half your things, house, kids , whatever, and get alimony and child support forever, you'll be an ATM . Of course you can go MGTOW and live like a monk, but this is cause of their esagerate power: in muslim countries where women count much like horses, you buy them, they have to obey husband etc is quite different, but in western countries women have all the power... that's the point. So the problem is not about socials or porn, it's about rules, laws and tribunals.

    • @i10i60
      @i10i60 2 года назад +1

      @@ragnarrlobrok244 What do you get from posting factually baseless nonsense?

  • @tvoovm7254
    @tvoovm7254 3 года назад +232

    I don't care about getting a relationship.
    I already have 3 relationships:
    1. Talent
    2. Food
    3. Man of Culture

    • @dalla-think3765
      @dalla-think3765 3 года назад +8

      1 . Passion *

    • @NikosM112
      @NikosM112 3 года назад +5

      My man!👌

    • @kata5398
      @kata5398 3 года назад +13

      bruh being addicted to cartoon porn is not "cultured"

    • @LethalByChoice
      @LethalByChoice 3 года назад +12

      @@kata5398 I'll take 'Making Wild Assumptions' for 600, Alex.
      In all seriousness, that *was* a pretty wild assumption there buddy.

    • @automobilership9888
      @automobilership9888 3 года назад +3

      @@kata5398 Never thought a nonce would admonish my taste in porn

  • @tootienottoofruitie1726
    @tootienottoofruitie1726 3 года назад +102

    Why am I single at 70❓ bc I never found anyone who measured up. Happy spring Cole 🤗

    • @lenaleo626
      @lenaleo626 3 года назад +18

      It fine to be alone at any age. Love yourself, enjoy yourself and people will be attracted to your personality and that you don't really need them. It's like when you were a kid and there is no one to play with and you go inside and get a ball and you act like your into playing alone. Someone will always ask can I play. You have to go to places you enjoy . The weather is getting nice, get out there. Have fun. 😁😊🥰

    • @JohnSmith-ys3wc
      @JohnSmith-ys3wc 3 года назад +17

      What super power do all women acquire after the age of 30?
      Invisibility

    • @ExtraCarrot
      @ExtraCarrot 3 года назад +4

      70 on youtube and up to date. Young Legend

    • @Icewind007
      @Icewind007 3 года назад

      ​@Fuck my pussy I am going to be using whatever cool tech they have around when I am 70 too. If I live that long...

    • @dan3954
      @dan3954 3 года назад +1

      With that thinking mentality there is no wonder why you haven't found anyone. Measured up to what? The insanely high standards you have set?

  • @erideb3864
    @erideb3864 3 года назад +106

    Society is just an abstract concept at this point and we just sit in a sandbox playing with our mellowed morality

  • @bobpage6597
    @bobpage6597 2 года назад +9

    I'm 37 years old and have no desire to be in a relationship. The last time I had anything 'romantic' was back in 2009, 13 years or so ago and I ended up cutting it off. I just haven't got the patience for it to be honest, I don't like the idea of having to share my life with someone. I have no desire to have kids - they're just a burden both financially and physically that I don't want. I saw my niece and nephew at the weekend during a visit to my parents, and I had to leave the room after a while - I just can't stand noisy children running around. I wanted my peace and quiet back.
    I have no desire to compromise on anything I want in my life either. I've become so used to being on my own, having that peace and quiet and doing everything alone that the very notion of sharing time and company with someone else for an extended period is just horrific to me. I like the idea of having my own space, being in my own space and coming home to a nice quiet apartment is blissful to me. I like the idea that I can put something down and not have someone bitch at me for leaving it there, or have it disappear the next day and find its been moved when I go looking for it haha. I'm just not wired to want a relationship I guess. My life is for me - the only ones I care about are my family and those few close friends I am fanatically loyal to. Nobody else really registers.
    Its a great life to be free :D

    • @itsmarius6054
      @itsmarius6054 Год назад +5

      i love rare comments like these. I love it when people are authentic and have an opinion. Honestly i feel similar about kids, so i get anxious when thinking about ever having them.

  • @avoidthevo1d
    @avoidthevo1d 3 года назад +149

    "Why you keep attracting shitty people"
    Well, i dont attract anyone.I dont even know what to think about it

    • @hdexotic1914
      @hdexotic1914 3 года назад +4

      Maybe it’s because you like Mario

    • @avoidthevo1d
      @avoidthevo1d 3 года назад +3

      @@hdexotic1914 Well, your remark is pretty dumb. Like, even for me. I would've been ashamed by myself to even think to type something this stupid. And it doesn't only apply to Mario, or any other thing in the world. It's stupid in any case.

    • @hdexotic1914
      @hdexotic1914 3 года назад

      @@avoidthevo1d I’ve never seen a Woman be Into a Man because he Likes Mario

    • @hdexotic1914
      @hdexotic1914 3 года назад +1

      @@avoidthevo1d Also you’re russian, So many Opportunities in russia and you chose mario?

    • @avoidthevo1d
      @avoidthevo1d 3 года назад +4

      @@hdexotic1914 Well, it's just a random pic that fitted into a profile pic resolution requirements. And, i dont even mention liking certain series of games unless she is also into them.
      Also, i have other hobbies, like skateboarding and tech.
      And i have never seen a woman who would like someone who would bother discussing someone's profile pic seriously and even assuming their personality based on a freakin profile pic.I dont even know a man who would want to talk to a guy with a pathetic mindset like that.

  • @coltenkelso5764
    @coltenkelso5764 3 года назад +139

    This is all 100% accurate. You have some good content. Social media, convenience, Dirty websites etc. all have ruined it. I'm staying single for now also. Sometimes it does get lonely and hard to cope with. But i'll watch this video once in a while to remind me that i'm not alone on this lol.

    • @danielaguirre2516
      @danielaguirre2516 2 года назад +8

      Same here, I’m living life to the fullest. Sometimes it can get lonely, but that’s kind of a rare situation nowadays for me. Unlike before back in 2018 during my college days.

    • @dacriticalgentleman
      @dacriticalgentleman 2 года назад +5

      Here is the thing this has been going on way before the internet. Look at the 60's, 70s, 80s and 90s it was present then too. Has anyone seen taxi driver, it really tells you the reality of what is going on.

    • @lonesurvivor815
      @lonesurvivor815 Год назад

      Don't worry brother, loneliness is way way easier to handle than the stress that comes from relationship, espesially from marriage, eeewwwww

  • @davidwarren7279
    @davidwarren7279 3 года назад +247

    The terms "toxic masculinity" and "toxic femininity" are meant to refer to the shitty behaviours that society teaches us about how to be a man/woman - e.g. "real men don't cry". But I will agree that these terms have been misappropriated, and a lot of people nowadays misuse them.

    • @honeyclover80
      @honeyclover80 3 года назад +29

      Agreed. Real men do cry. All human have tear duct. Men and women.

    • @Gaze73
      @Gaze73 3 года назад +20

      Men don't cry over trivial matters. I cried like 2 times in 5 years, it was my grandparents' funerals.

    • @Discaptured
      @Discaptured 3 года назад +6

      I don't think society tells women how to be women, instead society validates women.

    • @Discaptured
      @Discaptured 3 года назад

      @Fabian Kirchgessner that's true

    • @Gaze73
      @Gaze73 3 года назад +8

      @Tyler Braden Lmao. I had a laughing fit just yesterday when I watched a surstromming eating video. Toxic masculinity is a myth, back in the day it was just called masculinity. I'm not going to cry over BS just to fulfill an arbitrary quota.

  • @adeldarko9560
    @adeldarko9560 3 месяца назад +2

    33 and haven't been in a commited relationship for like 8 years now. I feel more focused and the only thing i think about is work. Love is really not a necessity but more like a bonus.

  • @justvibin1087
    @justvibin1087 3 года назад +185

    I can't find a single girl in my city who isn't addicted to her phone and is obsessed with herself. rip

    • @Amctothemoon
      @Amctothemoon 3 года назад +13

      Must be my home town

    • @davidbenning10
      @davidbenning10 3 года назад +43

      @Just Vibin Same. They might be drop dead gorgeous, but it means nothing when all they care is about themselves.

    • @playboss7684
      @playboss7684 3 года назад +13

      not just your city... my city in my country too... really rip...

    • @Mario-gm2ks
      @Mario-gm2ks 3 года назад +12

      If all the women are the problematic, then maybe you’re the problem

    • @Amctothemoon
      @Amctothemoon 3 года назад

      @@Mario-gm2ks tut tut

  • @MeZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZ
    @MeZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZzZ 3 года назад +48

    I'm a 30 y/o man. I've never dated, just a bunch of flings. I will continue to live like this the rest of my life. No dating, no marriage, no kids. At this stage I have too much to lose. Aint nobody making me sell my house or take half of my 401ks, crypto or any of my other assets. I'm good.

    • @recyclespinning9839
      @recyclespinning9839 3 года назад +2

      So what happens if you get someone pregnant ? Abortion? ? Good luck bud.

    • @LethalByChoice
      @LethalByChoice 3 года назад +9

      @@recyclespinning9839 Nice assumption bud. He probably is being careful or he got a vasectomy.

    • @CreativeCreaturefx
      @CreativeCreaturefx 3 года назад +2

      Smart man. Same here...but I'm 27

    • @GenerationX1984
      @GenerationX1984 3 года назад +1

      Never dated? Really? I'm 36 and haven't been on a date in years but I still dated.

    • @SlayerOfTheDamned
      @SlayerOfTheDamned 3 года назад +6

      That sounds like a sad life man. That money can’t comfort you as well as a son’s/daughter’s hug can

  • @ducdu4136
    @ducdu4136 3 года назад +76

    70 to 80 percent the women leave the men. My last 2 long relationships was ended by women. I still love women and take accountability for my life choices. I choose to stay single and continue to be the best version myself.

    • @katieb5052
      @katieb5052 3 года назад +5

      I disagree with this. I'm a woman & it is always men who have left me, even though I've been a good partner (noone is perfect). And I have lots of great female friends who have also been dumped by their last couple of partners.

    • @ducdu4136
      @ducdu4136 3 года назад +3

      @@katieb5052 I’m sorry to hear that n I Know it sucks. you can look up the data on divorce and it will tells you 70 plus percent are file by women.

    • @katieb5052
      @katieb5052 3 года назад +12

      I haven't seen the data but just because it shows women are the ones who initiate divorce proceedings doesn't mean they ended the relationships. It's often not the one who ended things who initiate it, they're simply the one who took that step & that could be for many reasons.

    • @andremalone4418
      @andremalone4418 3 года назад

      @@katieb5052 do u think its best for male and female to live separate.

    • @katieb5052
      @katieb5052 3 года назад

      @@andremalone4418 Whether couples live together or separate is down to what works for the couple. For me, I want a partner I can live & build a home with.

  • @rita5634
    @rita5634 2 года назад +7

    This video has totally changed my perspective! I have always blamed men for all that goes bad because, right from the start of my life, I unfortunately had a lot of negative experiences with men close to me (a lot of chauvinism and also submissive women, with supposedly good intentions or religious beliefs, letting this happen). Sadly, I brought this hate with me to my current relationship, which has caused a lot of conflict initially due to my lack of trust (because he is a male, he has to be doing something wrong) and high standards (a way to protect myself). However, with time I have come to realize he is a wonderful guy through his actions and it still amazes me until this day. It is so shocking how being surrounded by toxic people shapes so wrongly your perspective about the world, and also how much evilness can be excused by religious beliefs. Great video!

  • @__ManMilk
    @__ManMilk 3 года назад +78

    As a 14 year old guy who stumbled across this and thought it to be interesting, I must say that I’m genuinely scared. What’s the world gonna be like 20 years from now when I’m in my mid 30s? What’s it gonna be like in a few years when I turn 18? What’s gonna be left of the world that I’ve sorta grown up expecting to be there and what will be there instead? Is the world good for another few centuries or will it shit itself because of politics and social media and other stuff? I don’t know. That’s what scares me. The possibility of the vastly ddifferent reality to what I’ve grown up to expect being a young adult and adult would be like.

    • @xdandychiggins
      @xdandychiggins 3 года назад +33

      judging by how you articulate your thoughts, you’ll be just fine man.

    • @noa-ix9pe
      @noa-ix9pe 3 года назад +11

      Everything is always gonna turn out different than expected - regarding the world : I think us young people can really decide for ourselves what we want it to be like in the future. Sure we can control how the world is gonna be like, but we can decide what we want OUR OWN world to be like. Simply put - negative ppl will always live in a negative world while ppl with a positive attitude can still be happy despite some bs happening bc they can feel all the good stuff outshining the bad stuff. Both live in the same world, and yet it's two different worlds. We are the ones to decide bc it's OUR LIFE.

    • @jimfitzgerald2289
      @jimfitzgerald2289 3 года назад +4

      Can't be optimists. Dating is gonna be a thing of the past in the future and everybody will even forget what the hell were relationships and marriage about.

    • @jimfitzgerald2289
      @jimfitzgerald2289 3 года назад

      @RODRIGUEZ SANCHEZ *TEENAGE BOY

    • @mikeheaton8424
      @mikeheaton8424 2 года назад +15

      I’m 57 yrs , I feel for you ! In 1978 I was 14 . Your generation are living in a much harder time , than I was ! Stay away from drugs and alcohol , take education serious !

  • @omnivale1803
    @omnivale1803 3 года назад +43

    relationsips are strange these days, i dont find myself attracted to most people because i see these flaws in myself and them. in time i hope to become a better person and find someone whos on the same path as me

  • @huwinner2428
    @huwinner2428 3 года назад +43

    This video is such a haven of sanity in the insane culture of social media right now. Everybody hates each other, yet desperately want each other.
    You’re right, relationships are so important, and we need to learn how we can take care of each other because we’re connected as human beings
    Good luck to everybody. Love yourself and you’ll find someone who loves you

  • @LowkeyStoned
    @LowkeyStoned 2 года назад +4

    Since I was much younger I've had this same idea set in my head. I don't strive for relationships, If a relationship comes along and feels right I'll genuinely give it my best every day and if it fails I'll move on to the next or to nothing because you're life should revolve around making yourself better and growing

  • @TheDarkAdventure
    @TheDarkAdventure 3 года назад +48

    I'm 25 and yet to have a girlfriend. I honestly just don't see the purpose.

    • @Mdmd-h9y7u
      @Mdmd-h9y7u 3 года назад +3

      I've been in only one relationship from age 25-28. I'm 31 now

  • @manwithaplan135
    @manwithaplan135 3 года назад +118

    I had my 5 year relationship end because she said she felt "too Dependent"...but she told me she wanted someone to help support her if needed and a Man that could take care of her if needed. She's been struggling in her career since covid and I tried to help with anything she needed Rent, food and just being there emotionally... but I was also in a bind just before that and I was having medical problems and family problems which led to a nervous breakdown... I thought she would understand since she had gone through the same twice. But I was pushed aside and blocked by her whole family, and the worst thing is I found out they talked about my problems and laughed about it.

    • @2103038335
      @2103038335 3 года назад +43

      That's what happens when you simp for someone that only values you for your resources. sorry dude

    • @lordzooq8987
      @lordzooq8987 2 года назад +5

      @@2103038335 so true.

    • @basthe90sman97
      @basthe90sman97 2 года назад +8

      Her family is toxic. You may want to find someone else with a supportive family.

    • @ВладДок-д8щ
      @ВладДок-д8щ 2 года назад +3

      Good ol' classic. Only her problems are valid

    • @fairoadiary
      @fairoadiary 2 года назад +1

      i’m sorry that happened being used sucks
      :( i hope you find someone better!

  • @realitycheck4746
    @realitycheck4746 3 года назад +263

    It's not just men or women that are trash, it's everyone. I formed a relationship with my wallet and I'm never looking back.

    • @BryWMac
      @BryWMac 3 года назад +8

      I'm in the same place but it's annoying how all incentive points towards just focusing on a job

    • @DavidRodriguez-tr7qw
      @DavidRodriguez-tr7qw 3 года назад +19

      @@BryWMac im focusing on financial independence. I don't want to work a job for someone. That gives me more incentive.

    • @deviousj5868
      @deviousj5868 3 года назад +2

      Breakup with it and get a Ridgewallet bro. They're soo good to you.

    • @losbeonit8865
      @losbeonit8865 3 года назад +6

      “I formed a relationship with my wallet” I felt that

    • @lord_khufu
      @lord_khufu 3 года назад +1

      I’m very passionate with my electronics and i feel like nothing can replace them

  • @Ribyum
    @Ribyum 2 года назад +4

    Living through a miserable relationship that was one-sided and getting nothing of what I wanted out of it is the catalyst that made me realize that only I can bring true satisfaction and happiness to myself. No one else can. It always comes back to the buddhism teachings. Happiness is only ever to be found within oneself, not externally.

  • @emmanuelmathurin6195
    @emmanuelmathurin6195 3 года назад +33

    Cole is just dropping bangers on bangers lately

  • @painuchiha2694
    @painuchiha2694 3 года назад +22

    Hating each others won’t fix anything
    I can’t imagine men or women going in relationships while also keeping hatred towards the opposite gender
    It’s extremely narrow minded to judge all men or women based on personal experience

  • @TaysonPlaysGuitar
    @TaysonPlaysGuitar 3 года назад +41

    Dating seems to have lost the partnership aspect and seems to have become a battle of control and manipulation. For every good relationship I've seen there's about 3 or 4 bad ones. The current divorce rates seem to prove that that is pretty accurate.

    • @jamesgavin6171
      @jamesgavin6171 2 года назад

      Right relationships are controlling and manipulative that end with heartbreak, jealousy and dishonesty. There is never equality, take the term "Who wears the pants in the relationship". Nobody should wear the pants it should be an equal partnership. That's why I prefer to ditch the whole Boyfriend/ Girlfriend thing and just live free without chains soul bonding with other Women giving them the same freedom to see other guys and treating them like an actual human being rather than a sex object I can brag about to my friends at the bar.

  • @lordshenfan6625
    @lordshenfan6625 2 года назад +13

    I'm 29 and have been single for years. Honestly if you happy with being single then that's all that matters. It's your life at the end of the day and honestly being single has its good points to such as saving money, less stress when relationships don't go well, being able to spend more time with friends, and having more time for your hobbies. I'm happy with being on my own and having my own quite time to. It's far less stressful and more relaxing. People may see me as selfish but honestly even in relationships people are selfish. We all are to some degree.

    • @angryyoungman66
      @angryyoungman66 2 года назад +1

      I'm not happy with being single I'm comfortable and satified , I'm still learning to be happy alone.

    • @lordshenfan6625
      @lordshenfan6625 2 года назад

      @@angryyoungman66 you wil find your way. Trust me find hobbies and you'll be fine. That's how it was with me.

    • @angryyoungman66
      @angryyoungman66 2 года назад

      @@lordshenfan6625
      It's too late now my friend.

  • @lucianwong420
    @lucianwong420 3 года назад +22

    I usually get stupid looks when i say that i am single, people think it’s weird being single or something.

    • @morelife7625
      @morelife7625 3 года назад +7

      Lol 🤣🤣🤣😆🤣.
      I feel you fam. I fully understand what's it like to get stupid looks from family and friends when I say I'm single. They think relationships are special, that's why Its best stay away from them. In today's society, telling someone that you have being single for years is looked down upon. Just keep your head up fam, your doing great

  • @wesker1739
    @wesker1739 3 года назад +27

    That’s why I want nothing to do with relationships. I’m not looking for some petty attachments. Not my desire

  • @harshthechampful
    @harshthechampful 2 года назад +27

    Me being a introvert and having very few people in my life find it extremely difficult to find anyone. Social media compounds this by enhancing our expectations to the point where I don’t like anyone and don’t feel anyone will be compatible with me.

  • @tomw.1507
    @tomw.1507 3 года назад +19

    Wow! Well said! I'm happily married, but I found this via recommendations. And I really hope this keeps on getting recommended because wow, everything you said is so true. Indeed we have to fix ourselves and grow through hardships. I know so many people I have to share this to. I and my husband were lucky because through our individual experiences we knew exactly what we wanted and luckily that was each other. It's never too late! I got married at 29. Plus I like to say no one has their shit together until they're at minimum 25, and that only if they had a really tough life lol.

  • @MamaSwole
    @MamaSwole 3 года назад +102

    Such a goodass vid Cole. Thanks for promoting the message that we need to work together rather than blame/hate one another.

  • @saifliker1
    @saifliker1 3 года назад +91

    Haha bro I'm 26 and never dated a girl in my life, and what's funny as well is that I am still technically a virgin.

    • @nikisaaa3719
      @nikisaaa3719 3 года назад +37

      That is nothing to be ashamed of✌🏼

    • @lon3lyRacer
      @lon3lyRacer 3 года назад +20

      Technically?

    • @miguelblanco810
      @miguelblanco810 3 года назад +39

      There’s nothing wrong being a virgin at any age

    • @thevanman4498
      @thevanman4498 3 года назад +4

      Don’ t sweat I kept mine until 31.

    • @editor7354
      @editor7354 3 года назад +11

      Don’t lose ur virginity g

  • @princessjasmin4218
    @princessjasmin4218 2 года назад +5

    24 and never been in a relationship. Dating is too hard nowadays and I'm ready to give up. Have been heartbroken on countless occasions and I still have not found someone that is right for me. I'm not looking for perfection or the one/soulmate because I don't think that exists. People today have too high expectations and have the perfect person they've made up in their head...when that person does not exist. People say to "stop looking for love" when that makes absolutely no sense, how will you ever find anyone with that logic? Staying single sounds like the better option rather than having your time wasted.

  • @hoskins10
    @hoskins10 3 года назад +36

    Nice one Cole! I'm 28 and my only serious girlfriend broke up with me 4 months ago, after 3 years of relationship. A lot of thoughts went trough my mind, you speak about in that video.
    The breakup broke me inside and I'm still not completely over it, but I learned a lot of things the time after that.
    You summed that up pretty good in that video!

    • @DailyThingsInLife
      @DailyThingsInLife 3 года назад +1

      Don't you have other girls want to date you? Why not give them a chance?

    • @aegisreflector1239
      @aegisreflector1239 3 года назад +1

      Females have endless walking simps armies at their finger tips. They have a smart phone, they dont really have a nees or use to stay in a long term relationship

    • @woknwerk3293
      @woknwerk3293 3 года назад +1

      That’s gonna take some time , don’t be so hard on yourself. You are handsome man

    • @hoskins10
      @hoskins10 3 года назад

      @@woknwerk3293 Thanks man. that's true. time will heal all wounds!

    • @hoskins10
      @hoskins10 3 года назад

      @@DailyThingsInLife Actually I have not. I am now more open for other girls/dates, but I always had a hard time to get a date.

  • @shahidjamal407
    @shahidjamal407 3 года назад +290

    i feel as if hook up culture plays a big role too in these “modern” day relationships

    • @nothumanff5900
      @nothumanff5900 3 года назад +51

      Feminist brought hookup culture not men

    • @pdc4930
      @pdc4930 3 года назад +3

      Honestly i think Hook up culture is a myth. Very relationship starts with the believe that it will last forever, but increasingly it's short and people justify it by saying it was a Hookup.

    • @shahidjamal407
      @shahidjamal407 3 года назад +28

      @@pdc4930 brodie i don’t know who’s been in a relationship and then call it a hookup after the break up. it ain’t a myth. go to a club, bar or a party and you will see it for yourself

    • @AkashKumar-hf8rp
      @AkashKumar-hf8rp 3 года назад +2

      @UCQ4QXo2Roh6w6NE7pCrO4LA fuck these western culture

    • @selenamayfield5165
      @selenamayfield5165 3 года назад +3

      @@nothumanff5900 no they dudnt..stop blaming stuff on others

  • @jeppy4021
    @jeppy4021 3 года назад +55

    Its my parents fault... from my childhood my parents locked me up in my house and never made me interact with the outside world because "The world outside is full of sin"... yeah I grew up in a conservative Christian family in India.. but because of that now I cant even talk with anyone properly, more so with girls... since I wasn't able to interact with any girls or women from my childhood except my mom... now they suddenly leave my hand, leaving me with zero social skills and then blame me for " being stupid when I was a child" and I feel hopeless, not just with relationships but with life itself

    • @zarathustratv9114
      @zarathustratv9114 3 года назад +4

      Just talk to tons of people now. It will be terrible but slowly you will start to understand how to do it

    • @aaroncalapre5980
      @aaroncalapre5980 3 года назад +6

      That's fucking horrible man
      That type of experience can deeply affect your psyche and therefore a lot of things in life other than relationships. Your parents also seem to criticise you and your circumstances even though they were the cause of it.
      I'm not very proficient at talking with people either but what I do recommend is to take baby steps when learning social skills.
      Judging by this comment and its context, you seem to be fine with interacting with people online which is a good starting point.
      Try to find some people online in a community you have an interest in like a stars wars fan finding friends in a star wars community. After that, you can interact with them online like you did with this comment and maybe voice chat. Then you can video chat or face time or something once you are comfortable with these people. Then (if they are near you and not in another country or state lol), arrange meet up in person once comfortable and you are sure they are good people to hang out with.
      I know you made this comment two months ago but I hope this helps in one way or another.

    • @hypnoticlizard9693
      @hypnoticlizard9693 2 года назад +5

      Im in the same boat, but you can do it. Just talk to more people and work on yourself. Dont be too attached to outcomes and you wont be nervous.

    • @Bamawagoner
      @Bamawagoner 2 года назад

      I was a pretty sheltered christian kid locked out of a lot of stuff by my parents. Though not as severe as yours, I made friends through people I met at the gym (been working out for half a decade) and on a race car team I did in college.
      Take opportunities to socialize with people. Find out what you have in common and take an interest in what they’re like. A big part is being brave and making plans to do things with people even if you’re worried they’ll reject it. I usually make plans to go to a bar with new friends, and with my girlfriend I invited her to do stuff before we started dating.

    • @joegramlich
      @joegramlich 2 года назад +1

      First of all, yes it is partially your parents fault. But what are you going to do about it? You have seen the problem, don’t fucking blame it all on them and not take any action whatsoever. You do have responsibility for your life choices

  • @lindseym.1871
    @lindseym.1871 2 года назад +1

    We love a self aware king. I just found your channel as I’m going through a breakup myself. I was surprised to hear how similar your breakup story was compared to mine, but it honestly gives me hope that things will get better and I will come out of this situation with a new perspective on life. Keep up the good work.

  • @100pmistry
    @100pmistry 3 года назад +22

    You summarize both the extreme parts of mgtow and feminism very well! I was definitely one of those people who spiraled into tons of red pill content. It can become very toxic in those videos.
    Thanks for highlighting this on your channel, it needs to be addressed.

    • @ladydontekno
      @ladydontekno 3 года назад +2

      He didn’t summarize feminism at all, most people online get it completely wrong. Feminism is not an “equality” movement, it’s a liberation movement. It’s about not centering men in your life as a woman. That doesn’t mean disrespecting men either, so a statement like “men are trash” is not feminist because it’s centering men.

    • @adelb7897
      @adelb7897 2 года назад

      @@ladydontekno then tbh feminism has no meaning anymore since everyone defines it differently and puts themselves under the umbrella for different reasons. I think rn feminism is a joke (so are the extreme mens movements like incel threads). Feminism is outdated, mens movements don't really help much. We need something more unifying and inclusive, unlike feminism where the word itself is divisive since it has 'fem' in it.
      The current way things are just aren't working, and i guess we haven't figured out the new order... I wouldn't know either, all I know is that we definitely do need a new order to replace the old ones.

  • @paigemya
    @paigemya 3 года назад +41

    Today is my 25th birthday and I was having a bit of a quarter life crisis myself and found this video. Really helped me today. Thank you.

  • @NiteXD
    @NiteXD 3 года назад +4

    Hey man I just found your channel and I’m 23 years old and was in a 3 year relationship where it was the first time I ever deeply cared about anyone in my life and she just ended it a couple days ago. A lot of really bad things have happened in the past few months as well and this break up it absolutely ruined me. After balling my eyes out for a couple days straight, I started watching a couple of your videos and man are they already helping me so much. I know it’ll take some time to fully recover but I’m trying to start straight away. Keep up the great content and helping other kings and queens pick their crowns back up.

  • @dustinweist3160
    @dustinweist3160 2 года назад +10

    Life relies on luck a lot more than most people like to admit. Especially when it comes to dating and relationships. It's all about finding the right person? Ever notice that it's always the people that are happy in a relationship that say that? They already lucked out. You don't know that you ever will find the right person. Luck. A lot in life boils down to luck. I'm 26 and I have been searching for an optimal relationship. I've approached about a half dozen people in the past decade and always got turned down. I don't even have the opportunity to get my heart broken because I can even get put in a relationship even if I try. Now those people didn't like me that way which is perfectly fine. People are entitled to preference. Not playing the victim to that. But it's still luck to find someone you like that likes you back. There seems to be that there needs to be so many things that need to fall in place between 2 different individuals that makes it more difficult than most people realize. And the people who don't realize are usually in a relationship that they are happy with and lucked out.