What English people SAY vs What English people MEAN! | Passive Aggressive Business English!

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  • Опубликовано: 24 дек 2024

Комментарии • 1,8 тыс.

  • @EnglishwithLucy
    @EnglishwithLucy  2 года назад +265

    British people like to avoid saying what we really mean at work and in emails! What we SAY vs what we really mean in business English! ⭐ The Business English Course Offer: bit.ly/BusinessCourseOffer
    📝 *GET THE FREE LESSON PDF* _here_ 👉🏼 bit.ly/BizMeaningPDF
    📊 *FIND OUT YOUR ENGLISH LEVEL!* _Take my level test here_ 👉🏼 bit.ly/EnglishLevelTest12
    👩🏼‍🏫 *JOIN MY ONLINE ENGLISH COURSES:* englishwithlucy.teachable.com/courses - _We have launched our B1 and B2 Complete English Programmes!_

    • @theheros4863
      @theheros4863 2 года назад +1

      Thank s

    • @reshmaselvaraj
      @reshmaselvaraj 2 года назад +12

      Every formal email I'm going to receive hereafter will only remind me of this video.😂

    • @MuhammadAli-uv3gs
      @MuhammadAli-uv3gs 2 года назад +5

      My lovely teacher 🤲🤲

    • @cogitated
      @cogitated 2 года назад +9

      It’s not just Brits! I’m an Aussie and use these phrases at work when I’m frustrated!

    • @mehyiddinemeslem3842
      @mehyiddinemeslem3842 2 года назад +1

      Aïd Moubarak 🐑🐏🐑🐏🐑🐏🐑🐏 عيد أضحى مبارك

  • @AUSCHWETTE
    @AUSCHWETTE Месяц назад +48

    I have been in business in English speaking worlds for decades and found that regards, sincerely, yours truly....... mean nothing more than ' the end of conversation '.

  • @hooligan9794
    @hooligan9794 Месяц назад +144

    Regards is perfectly fine and is not remotely negative.
    In large organisations you deal with tons of people you hardly or even don't at all know. Regards is completely fine.

    • @maritaberndt6200
      @maritaberndt6200 Месяц назад +8

      😂 you think?

    • @hooligan9794
      @hooligan9794 Месяц назад

      @@maritaberndt6200 I do. I have used it many times and received it hundreds of times. Standard business sign-off

    • @Ken_oh545
      @Ken_oh545 Месяц назад

      hooligan is spot on​@@maritaberndt6200

    • @garybutler8316
      @garybutler8316 Месяц назад

      @@maritaberndt6200 It is definitely fine

    • @endlessstudent3512
      @endlessstudent3512 Месяц назад +16

      Even if I do not know persons, I still would use "best regards". Just regards I would consider impolite.

  • @lerolerolerolerolero256
    @lerolerolerolerolero256 2 года назад +862

    Also the words "Gentle reminder"... It has such a passive aggressive tone to it. It's like when you're clearly frustrated when someone hasn't completed the task but don't want to show it.

    • @EnglishwithLucy
      @EnglishwithLucy  2 года назад +120

      Totally agree 😂

    • @zhazhalove
      @zhazhalove 2 года назад +8

      That is very not a gentle term. I always using it. I thought, it is nice and soft to remind my team

    • @allthingsmireille
      @allthingsmireille 2 года назад +12

      Hahaha, you’re quite right! This is one of the phrases I use the most when needing info asap.

    • @JustMrFox
      @JustMrFox 2 года назад +19

      Totally disagree.
      What would sound not passive aggressive? “Hey, do that stuff I told you yesterday about”?

    • @jimarcher5255
      @jimarcher5255 2 года назад +38

      In the US, “If you have the time”, means “I need this now”.

  • @gwendolineknox784
    @gwendolineknox784 25 дней назад +13

    Just found you Lucy. Love it!
    I am British aged 77, went to an all girls Grammar School with a BRILLIANT English teacher. Her lessons stayed with me forever.
    When I worked in a Chartered Accountant's office as an audio typist, the boss was very old school, 'office speak' had not arrived and our written and spoken English had to be 'top notch'.
    Nowadays if someone starts 'office speak' on the phone to me, I stop them and say "Can you say that again in English please, and by the way, my name is Mrs Knox not Gwendoline. I'm not your friend.
    No prisoners here. My family despair of me 🤭(but they all speak nicely😂 )

  • @StephanLuik1
    @StephanLuik1 Месяц назад +80

    When I was young, I wrote a piece of software and showed a demo to an English client. His response was: "That's lovely. Now, what we would like to have..."
    As I am Dutch, I rather like to deal with people that just say what they mean.

    • @hen-rey
      @hen-rey Месяц назад

      Than come to Germany
      Unbrauchbarer Müll!
      Unusable trash!

    • @ninatankardina8644
      @ninatankardina8644 24 дня назад +5

      Well what if it was lovely indeed, just not what they've wanted😂

    • @Taichientaoyin
      @Taichientaoyin 23 дня назад +3

      Of that Dutch directness is tough but I believe I should be thankful for it. The British keep all to themselves till they explode.

    • @szymonbaranowski8184
      @szymonbaranowski8184 23 дня назад

      isn't Holland equally elitist as England?

    • @yana1852
      @yana1852 20 дней назад

      ​@@szymonbaranowski8184no it isn't

  • @teawithtams6596
    @teawithtams6596 2 года назад +672

    When I was working in London, I learned that when my colleagues say "fair enough", they really mean "you're wrong, but I don't want to argue with you anymore".

    • @hens0w
      @hens0w 2 года назад +54

      To be fair "fair enough" has some element of I bow to your judgement (or at least this won't cause me problems).
      Where as if I really strongly disagree: "OK. fine,"

    • @teawithtams6596
      @teawithtams6596 2 года назад +45

      @@hens0w fair enough :D

    • @andreagriffiths3512
      @andreagriffiths3512 2 года назад +24

      Fair enough in Australia is more of a conversation ender. Sometimes gives you an opinion you don’t like/value/believe - you reply with ‘fair enough’ means you can’t even be bothered discussing it. It doesn’t even mean the other person is wrong and it’s one I use a fair bit….oooops

    • @bromptondevice7685
      @bromptondevice7685 2 года назад +18

      @@andreagriffiths3512 It's also used when some one queries another's decision without knowing the full story.
      Eg "Why's the storeroom locked?"
      "Accounts keep coming up and taking all our staples because their stores clerk is a useless ****** who doesn't order enough."
      "Ah, fair enough. Can I borrow the key?"
      "Sure".

    • @rvrmn2682
      @rvrmn2682 2 года назад +6

      Well, I guess this explains why I always subconsciously interpreted this as, "I'm too intellectually lazy, smug, and self-satisfied to examine the issue any further."

  • @ΑΛΕΞΑΝΔΡΟΣΑΛΕΞ-ο7η
    @ΑΛΕΞΑΝΔΡΟΣΑΛΕΞ-ο7η 2 года назад +76

    I remember that wonderful quote Hercule Poirot said , while he was talking to Linnet Doyle (Emily Blunt) , which was this : " I listen to what you say , but I hear what you mean " .

    • @anapantovic6859
      @anapantovic6859 9 месяцев назад +3

      😂😂

    • @catherine4385
      @catherine4385 Месяц назад +2

      Oh! I like it, I like it and am going to adopt it! 😊

  • @ACGreyhound04
    @ACGreyhound04 2 года назад +75

    I think the phrase “with all due respect” is typically used prior to disagreeing with someone who outranks you. It carries the connotation of “I disagree, but will do it your way because you’re the boss.”

    • @drunvert
      @drunvert 2 года назад +1

      Basically, verbatim

    • @alexstoyanov6108
      @alexstoyanov6108 Месяц назад +3

      Since I have an override authority in my position, I use it when I`m going to do it my way despite the boss.

    • @Taladar2003
      @Taladar2003 Месяц назад +5

      With all due respect basically means "I think absolutely no respect is due in this case but I am going to phrase it so we both have plausible deniability on that statement".

    • @martinchorich1621
      @martinchorich1621 Месяц назад +4

      With all due respect, which is to say no respect at all…

    • @Ken_oh545
      @Ken_oh545 Месяц назад +2

      A classic example of this phrase : with all due respect, that is hands down the stupidest idea I have heard in about 15 years.

  • @docbrown2045
    @docbrown2045 2 года назад +874

    My manager once had British vs. American experience. After some bad meeting he and the other guy were making a coffee and talking about it, he said "That was a very interesting conversation", and the guy replied "I'm American, you can just say how it is. And it was shit".

    • @honeyyy8
      @honeyyy8 2 года назад +47

      Hahahaha, that was funny! Thank you for sharing!

    • @dvvna
      @dvvna 2 года назад +30

      Same statement, different delivery

    • @altamasparsanov9181
      @altamasparsanov9181 2 года назад +6

      Hahaha

    • @irodaburkhan
      @irodaburkhan 2 года назад +9

      Can't stop laughing xD

    • @anndeecosita3586
      @anndeecosita3586 2 года назад +31

      @@axemansjazz6670 I think with whether Americans tend to be direct, it depends on what part of the country.

  • @_DeadlyNightshade_
    @_DeadlyNightshade_ 2 года назад +38

    As a non-native English speaker who likes the language and have lived in the UK, I believe certain sentences can be understood as sarcasm in certain situations as opposed to being strictly malicious or hateful. For those who don't know, the British sense of humour is basically sarcasm most of the time.
    Thank you Lucy,
    KIND Regards 😁

    • @JOHNTHEWHISK
      @JOHNTHEWHISK Месяц назад +1

      I have laid into some people in response to their passive aggressive responses. No good company resorts to those type of emails. Only sh*t companies who don't know what they're doing.

    • @paolamura3497
      @paolamura3497 Месяц назад +3

      Yes..sarcasm. but it's so amusing most of the time.

    • @RoyStuartwarpdrive
      @RoyStuartwarpdrive 12 часов назад

      "Quiet desperation is the English way" (Genesis, Selling England by the pound)

  • @stevensprung-wo3pk
    @stevensprung-wo3pk Месяц назад +13

    In a business context, "let's play it by ear" means to approach a situation without a fixed plan, adapting and responding to circumstances as they arise rather than following a strict agenda or roadmap. It involves being flexible, reading the room, and adjusting the strategy based on real-time developments, feedback, or the specific dynamics of the moment.
    For instance:
    In a meeting: It might mean skipping parts of a planned agenda if the conversation takes an unexpected but valuable direction.
    In negotiations: It can mean being open to pivoting based on the other party’s responses rather than sticking rigidly to a prepared script or strategy.
    In project management: Playing it by ear could involve making adjustments as new information surfaces, rather than adhering strictly to a timeline or process.
    This approach allows for responsiveness and can be especially useful when dealing with uncertain, fast-changing, or complex scenarios. However, it also requires good judgment, quick thinking, and an ability to stay calm and focused without a rigid framework to rely on.

    • @stefan_sth
      @stefan_sth Месяц назад

      That's the disadvantage of not communicating clearly: two different explanations 😮
      Language is complicated. Every language ;)

    • @stevensprung-wo3pk
      @stevensprung-wo3pk Месяц назад

      @@stefan_sth I disagree, language is neutral, like a tool, if you only know the hammer, every challenge is a nail.

  • @michaelc.1710
    @michaelc.1710 2 года назад +69

    Native speaker here (English person learning Portuguese so not sure why this came up in my feed but sounded interesting ). The problem with some of these is that they’re also used sincerely eg “that’s an interesting perspective” or “we’ll take that into consideration”. In person you’ll hopefully tell the difference in tone and body language but good luck sensing that from an email, even we can’t always.

    • @wintersnowowen2254
      @wintersnowowen2254 Год назад +11

      For this the English tend to use really and actually a lot. So instead of “that’s an interesting perspective” which might be seen as being PA, they will say “that’s a really interesting perspective,actually”.

    • @modo2213
      @modo2213 Месяц назад +4

      I hope no one takes this video seriously

    • @DianaT-ph6iz
      @DianaT-ph6iz Месяц назад +3

      yes. if intonation conveys sarcasm or not - it all depends on intonation and context.

    • @HxTurtle
      @HxTurtle Месяц назад +1

      true! in Canada (as far as I got it), "let's circle back to this later" is more of an acknowledgement of being overworked and/or overwhelmed right now or not yet having done the necessary research on this topic in order to engage in a meaningful conversation.
      it usually means that there's real intent to get back to it at some other point.

  • @lucyhardman2267
    @lucyhardman2267 2 года назад +5

    I once met a woman who spoke exclusively in corporate jargon. I didn't have a clue what she was talking about half the time but it was fascinating to watch. I honestly don't know how she could remember it all.

  • @margaretgreenwood4243
    @margaretgreenwood4243 2 года назад +35

    When I was a secretary back in the 1960s, my boss, a highly educated man, would dictate letters to me which I took down in Shorthand. His language was sometimes very passive aggressive couched in the terms you describe. I could hardly write for laughing at the clever poisoned darts aimed at the recipients

    • @ComplainingIsRecreation
      @ComplainingIsRecreation Месяц назад +3

      Wow he must have made quite the impression for you to be so clearly in love with him some 60 years later lol.

  • @stanleymccleave9684
    @stanleymccleave9684 2 года назад +111

    Although I am a native English speaker (American version) I find Lucy so utterly charming that I've been watching several lessons. I like the clean style of the videos, all well presented. Lucy speaks so beautifully that it is a joy to listen to her subtle humor that is at times self-deprecating and always with a light touch. Lucy is gorgeous as well, always put-together in an elegant but friendly manner. I wish her continued success and my warmest regards.

    • @dmitriylee8925
      @dmitriylee8925 2 года назад +5

      Absolutely agree, I also admire Lucy, she is constantly making so lovely english lessons for us, with joy and pleasure. With her we all definitely should start speaking english. I´m currently waiting news from her farm and wish her all the best.

    • @C.I366
      @C.I366 Месяц назад +1

      Utterly indeed

    • @C.I366
      @C.I366 Месяц назад +3

      Someone is hers faithfully..

    • @bobtahoma
      @bobtahoma Месяц назад +3

      Respectfully, I am not sure you can consider yourself a native English speaker as an American. You would do well to watch a few of her videos to learn how to speak English properly. I am sure you will find it quite colourful. Regards.

    • @JuanGonzalez-hv6vs
      @JuanGonzalez-hv6vs Месяц назад +1

      This man is in love.

  • @ashton1952
    @ashton1952 2 года назад +224

    As a native speaker of English I don't see anything wrong with using 'regards', it's a polite and simple way to end an email. All depends on the intention of the speaker; some people have to use tactics in order to feel superior and that entirely reflects on their insecurities and whatever other personal issues.

    • @adedow1333
      @adedow1333 2 года назад +11

      I use this one as a passé i-dont-have-strong-feelings-about-you kind of sign-off

    • @LilyAmongThorns
      @LilyAmongThorns 2 года назад +4

      I think it might depend on the kind of relationship one has with the sender. If you have a deep connection with them (mother-in-law, or longtime friend, or even a coworker that you’ve always had a very good relationship with for example) it might be sending that passive aggressive message of “you’ve just become very insignificant in my life”.

    • @jonchambers131
      @jonchambers131 2 года назад +12

      @Ashton - the standard phrase is 'kind regards' so if you just say 'regards' it means you're making a concious decision to not be kind!

    • @ashton1952
      @ashton1952 2 года назад +5

      @@jonchambers131 Yes, maybe we shouldn't leave room for doubt 😉

    • @micheledix2616
      @micheledix2616 2 года назад +31

      As an English speaking person ( first langauge) and when I write 'regards or cheers' I really mean regards or cheers and not any other under meaning. Maybe it is because I am on the older side and my education was decades ago

  • @Haarhzh
    @Haarhzh 2 года назад +20

    The “I’ll take that into consideration” reminds me of a sketch in the British TV-series “Yes, Minister”, where a distinction is made between “take into consideration” and “take into active consideration”. Lovely!

    • @TheCimbrianBull
      @TheCimbrianBull 2 года назад +5

      Presumably uttered by Sir Humphrey Appleby!

  • @Ben-Hollingbery
    @Ben-Hollingbery 2 года назад +12

    Native english speaker here, I use these all the time at work and you have to qualify them. For example "That's an interesting perspective, we'll circle back to that in a little while" means "I like that idea, let's put it to one side for now so we can focus on the main task(s) first.

    • @AlexKarasev
      @AlexKarasev Месяц назад +1

      That's quite good. Let's put that at the top of our "B" list
      =
      It's a bit disappointing. Let's never speak of it ever again :)

  • @АлёнаЕгорова-ъ4х
    @АлёнаЕгорова-ъ4х 2 года назад +13

    thanks now I know I have to translate from my native into English and further from English into English! So lovely

  • @joebloggs2473
    @joebloggs2473 2 года назад +60

    Thank goodness I worked in a Dutch environment. Straight talking saves time which saves money and is more efficient. Going round the garden is so English.

    • @oliverv305
      @oliverv305 Месяц назад +8

      I'm british and it annoys me. Just say it as it is and get to the point ffs.

    • @MoD_Master_Of_Disaster_
      @MoD_Master_Of_Disaster_ Месяц назад +1

      Grin, that’s what we’re know for, or accused of, depending on who you ask.
      I’m from Amsterdam.

    • @sneezyfido
      @sneezyfido Месяц назад +2

      It depends on where you work.
      I've been the only guy in my dpt and surrounded by 80% female dpts for some years.
      The few men were constantly walking on eggshells because anything could get the whole coven on our necks. It could even happen when a colleague was frustrated about drama with another woman (always multiple threads going on) but couldn't speak up there due to hierarchy. So she'd lash out at whoever she could target - usually one of the men.
      HR (100% female) were involved but their stance was basically that the men should be more understanding and supportive. Reports were never filed in any of the women's dossiers (unless it was someone that HR had drama with).
      Imagine doing an internal audit and having to report a significant issue.
      Or explaining the downsides of any proposed plan.

    • @brockside1575
      @brockside1575 Месяц назад +5

      Well, I’m from the North and hardly lasted five minutes of this bullshit. I worked in an office environment for many years, in fact as the top person. We never had any of this rubbish, we just said, yes I agree or nope, I don’t agree. I guess she can make money out of this, for Christ’s sake.

    • @tomodomo1000
      @tomodomo1000 Месяц назад +1

      It's great, but my company is strange. They never plan ahead; they just build something and try to adjust (apparently, it is cheaper). They waste a lot of time in meetings (because management must do something). They love to make new rules for the smallest and most meaningless things, printing on paper everywhere.

  • @siangmingalexlau8220
    @siangmingalexlau8220 2 года назад +37

    Business English can sometimes sound like passive-aggressive contrived politeness.

  • @jakemarcus9999
    @jakemarcus9999 Год назад +20

    In Finland we say what we mean and that's it.

    • @andreasgoetz5598
      @andreasgoetz5598 Месяц назад +5

      should be same everywhere 😊

    • @RoyStuartwarpdrive
      @RoyStuartwarpdrive 12 часов назад

      "In Finland we say what we mean and that's it".... that's so mean!

  • @BBKing1977
    @BBKing1977 2 года назад +9

    "I'm just looping [insert name here] in on this."
    I'm not sure if this one is used much in the UK, but I see it in Canada a lot.
    This one depends on context. Sometimes this is genuine as you just want to include an additional person, but sometimes it's a passive aggressive way of saying "this has nothing to do with me, and I don't know why you sent it to me at all, but here's the person you should've contacted in the first place".

  • @johnjekyllson28
    @johnjekyllson28 2 года назад +7

    The way you say “It seems there has been a misunderstanding” gave me chills.

  • @snich63
    @snich63 2 года назад +11

    I think the “Regards” warning is specific to British English. “Regards” is is the standard email closing in New Zealand.
    One that missed this list is “Kindly” e.g. Kindly fill in this form and return it. Using “kindly” instead of “please” telegraphs some subtle snark. I’ve advised numerous non-native English speakers not to use “kindly” as an alternative.

    • @thetrashmaster1352
      @thetrashmaster1352 2 года назад +4

      Same in Australia as well, "Regards" is probably the most common way to sign off even with customers.

    • @phineaspepper3530
      @phineaspepper3530 2 года назад +2

      Same in the U.S. Ending with just "Regards" or "Best" is common and doesn't carry bad connotations.

    • @amandajane8227
      @amandajane8227 2 года назад +1

      @@thetrashmaster1352 If I am happy with the service I am getting I use warm regards or kind regards. If I am pissed off I just use regards. I guess the other ozzies I communicate with may be missing this.

  • @zekaay
    @zekaay Месяц назад +6

    So true, oh how I hate that environment. I am a non-native speaker, but did my first degree in English Lit. and later on went on to work with native speakers in office environments and quickly understood what people really mean by certain expressions. My god, I am so glad I am out that environment, don't think I can watch the video till the end it's very triggering.

  • @userwsyz
    @userwsyz 2 года назад +72

    I have never thought there is a difference between kind regards and regards. In the US, I think people just use regards at the end of emails as a habit or formality rather than meaning anything.

    • @3006Ave
      @3006Ave 2 года назад +13

      I use regards at work all of the time.

    • @rw80
      @rw80 2 года назад +3

      It’s really an English thing. Not British, but English.

    • @RickDistance
      @RickDistance 2 года назад +3

      I think "regards" is just short for common use.

    • @anndeecosita3586
      @anndeecosita3586 2 года назад +7

      I’m American and at least in my circles we use regards in more conversation than written. “Give my regards to your grandmother” means like tell your grandmother I said hello. I would write sincerely or best wishes on a letter or email rather than regards.

    • @1Thunderfire
      @1Thunderfire 2 года назад +20

      I have literally never heard of it being aggressive in any way in the UK. I sign off all my work emails with regards. It's polite enough without going over the top.
      P.S Only arrived here with curiosity about the thumbnail.

  • @MadokaKima
    @MadokaKima 2 года назад +6

    Thank you! As a foreigner in the UK working in a business environment, this is very helpful.
    One of the ones I hate the most is "I'm happy for you to do smth". I so wish they said directly "please do this", instead of making it sound like they're generosity delegating the task to me, when in truth they really don't want to do it!

    • @KNOWLEDGEIsPOWER-t1y
      @KNOWLEDGEIsPOWER-t1y 2 месяца назад +2

      Yes! British people will also say, "Would you like to do (a task)" when they actually mean you have to do it.

  • @oh2sail
    @oh2sail 2 года назад +5

    This American lived for a year in Cambridge 30 years ago. I remember thinking, several times every day (!!) that someone was insulting me in a passive aggressive way, but I’m one that always likes to think the best of people. I finally became good friends with a native, and when I brought it up to her I was rather shocked when she told me, “oh, yes. Everyone IS insulting you every day.”

  • @fozzytheflyingmuppet
    @fozzytheflyingmuppet 2 года назад +53

    Loved your video! This is probably the most difficult for us Dutch people. We're known to just say what we mean and not beat around the bush.

    • @enjoystraveling
      @enjoystraveling Месяц назад +7

      The same with the Germans, where I lived for about 10 years. At least you don’t have to guess what is the underlined meaning.

    • @enjoystraveling
      @enjoystraveling Месяц назад +1

      I meant to write underlying meeting

    • @sommer1982official
      @sommer1982official Месяц назад +2

      Same here, I’m German 😉

    • @LettersFromAFriend
      @LettersFromAFriend Месяц назад +2

      ​@@enjoystravelingAs a German, I can say that "interesting idea" means "you must be crazy" unless the sentence is continued.

    • @gwendolineknox784
      @gwendolineknox784 25 дней назад

      I once had a Dutch person ask me "How do you get to tell a person politely that you don't want to be bothered with them any more?"
      My answer "Ignore them. They will get the message without you having to say anything"

  • @druscanam
    @druscanam 2 года назад +267

    Hahaha this is gold 🤣 😂
    Somewhat related, I had a friend that got blown off on a date. She appoligised and explained through a text message, that she couldn't meet their prior arrangement because she was tried and needed to have an early nights sleep.
    He replied with "Rest in peace". 🤣🤣🤣

    • @nowshinsstudio6273
      @nowshinsstudio6273 2 года назад +10

      😂😂😂

    • @pedroarthurbarbosa
      @pedroarthurbarbosa 2 года назад +3

      Is Rest well aggressive? I use it so much 😴 🛌 haha

    • @druscanam
      @druscanam 2 года назад +33

      @@pedroarthurbarbosa
      No, it's because Rest In Peace in English is typically an expression used when someone has died, is often said at a funeral and sometimes engraved on someone's tombstone. It's is also often abrivated as R.I.P.
      So saying to someone "rest in peace" may seem like caring sentiment for someone who needs a good sleep however it's also inadvertently implying they should never wake up, in other words, die. So, basically it's telling them to drop dead without actually saying so. Furthermore because its literal meaning is quite endearing, one cannot be accused of being obnoxious when saying such a horrendous thing.

    • @francescaminart6308
      @francescaminart6308 2 года назад +3

      @@druscanam In 🇪🇸 D.E.P Descanse en paz (in latin R.I.P.)

    • @GeorgeCross-i7c
      @GeorgeCross-i7c 2 года назад +1

      I'd probably answer RIP if person plans a date with me and a bit too late announces they aren't coming.

  • @PatGilliland
    @PatGilliland 2 года назад +42

    I'm a Canadian with British parents so I speak both dialects. I dare not share this video with my work colleagues - they'll find out what I'm _really_ saying.

    • @floatingsara
      @floatingsara Месяц назад +2

      @patGillland I work with Canadian colleagues and sometimes I wonder if they do the same thing. So you say no, apparently 😅

  • @matthewfusaro2590
    @matthewfusaro2590 2 года назад +22

    You just reaffirmed why I hate the corporate world. I frequently use "regards" at the end of my email but never gave much thought to what it could mean to the other person. I'll have to reconsider using "regards" in the future.

    • @anapantovic6859
      @anapantovic6859 9 месяцев назад +9

      Not a native, and to me this feels like the most appropriate ending to a letter sent to a business correspondent. A bit sterile, but neutral. "Warmest" sounds waaay too insencere... 🤔

    • @jerry2357
      @jerry2357 Месяц назад +1

      I always use "best wishes".

    • @O2life
      @O2life Месяц назад +6

      Regards is neutral in the US. More like, "I don't like ending emails, but this is the end of this email."

  • @td3807
    @td3807 2 года назад +4

    I had a British co-worker. She is emotionally intelligent but very passive aggressive. The phrases in this video remind me of her.

  • @kevins2684
    @kevins2684 2 года назад +2

    I’m a native English speaker now retired from business and I’ve almost always used just ‘Regards,’ to sign emails followed by my first name. I have taken the view that ‘warmest regards’ might be assuming a presumption of friendship or intimacy with the recipient which does not exist. Even ‘kind regards’ sounds to me like I’m addressing a subordinate or inferior colleague/acquaintance. There seems to be an obsession these days with a need to be ‘kind’ or ‘warm & fuzzy’. This has led to terrible social awkwardness and misunderstanding.

  • @calciumchannel
    @calciumchannel 2 года назад +7

    This video is so needed. I wish I knew all this stuff before I came to Britain. It is not only in corpos people talk like this, in every day life it is also common.

  • @vasili9756
    @vasili9756 2 года назад +4

    SO much need it, as I am not a native speaker, and I was always wondering what they really mean, hovering over the earth with a big question mark over my head!!!! Thank you!!!!!!

  • @nafslee
    @nafslee 2 года назад +4

    I use Kind Regards when its a person I haven't emailed before or not familiar with and Regards regularly for everyone else because it sounds less formal. I don't use it for a passive aggressive undertone.

  • @tessat338
    @tessat338 2 года назад +6

    It's interesting to see how British business-speak influences American business-speak and vice-versa. "Stick a pin in it" means literally to post something on a message board by fastening a piece of paper on it with a pin. As we all know, messages on a board quickly go out of date and get covered up by other messages. This polite, formal, passive-aggressive way of speaking is because we all have to keep working together day in and day out and we can't blow up relationships without serious fall-out. This style of speaking gives everyone reasonable acknowledgement and allows people to feel that they have been heard, if possibly not fully understood. It allows people to disagree and to still continue on with the job.

  • @twocents-Thomas-Zadro
    @twocents-Thomas-Zadro Месяц назад +3

    The funny thing is that Brits also use this kind of language when dealing with people outside their island, just to learn the hard way that it does not work. Tell a German, "That's interesting," and he will keep on speaking, excited about your positive feedback :-). I had several British line managers, and I can tell you that they learned very quickly that they had to say what they wanted or meant, as otherwise, nothing went the way they intended.

  • @davidmarkwort9711
    @davidmarkwort9711 Месяц назад +3

    We learned that in our English lessons in London, how to be polite and be facetious at the same time, we also learnt how Shakespeare used the language to insult. Always smile until you turn around, then show the disgusted face. Was useful at work.

  • @Ghost_Os
    @Ghost_Os 2 года назад +38

    I'm a native speaker. I must say, I actually use number 5 (interesting perspective) in both ways; both the passive aggressive version given here (which I honestly try to make very clear in a teasing sort of way that I think what was just said is absurd or patently insane) as well as the very direct, exactly-as-worded usage: I genuinely find the perspective interesting or intriguing.
    Number 15 (and the video thumbnail); yes to 'warm(est) regards', yes to 'kind regards', but I actually use 'regards' in the same way as 'kind regards'; as a generically friendly expression. Occasionally, I will escalate a 'regards' to a 'kindest' or 'warmest' regards.

  • @socialexperiment8045
    @socialexperiment8045 2 года назад +20

    “Tonality” also plays a huge part when mentioning these sentences!

    • @AlbertNonime
      @AlbertNonime 2 года назад +5

      Tonality in an e-mail... thats an interesting idea to be considered.

  • @clivepygott3883
    @clivepygott3883 2 года назад +14

    You missed one of my favourites (that I have been know to use myself) "I hear what you say" - which means 'I've heard what you said, but I thoroughly intend to ignore it from now on'

    • @lemsip207
      @lemsip207 Месяц назад +1

      I overhear what you say.

    • @tamaramarkovic1092
      @tamaramarkovic1092 18 дней назад

      It pairs well with "I'll keep that in mind", meaning "I've forgotten it already".

  • @whatevergoesforme5129
    @whatevergoesforme5129 2 года назад +8

    I think all cultures tend to avoid being too direct so polite language was created to avoid hurting the feelings of others too much. Of course, many can be tactless, but those who want to be seen as civil/polite needs to be careful with their wording. But even if the Brits use this kind of polite language as shown in this video, the true meaning is still clear, especially when you hear the word "but." In my Asian world, our language can too indirect that foreigners can't really catch the true meaning of our words . We don't use polite phrases to soften the blow. We use paragraphs at times to avoid being too blunt LOL.

  • @penelopetoniaccini8783
    @penelopetoniaccini8783 2 года назад +15

    I learnt 95% of this by working in the bank in Dublin, I learnt fast and thought it was brilliant language, however I wish I'd known the real meaning behind each phrase as you explain it in this video, so as to use each even better. I can't remember the amount of times I used 'as per my previous email' and 'for your future reference'.
    In the banks where I worked people seemed to be particularly thick!!!

    • @grahammcfadyenhill9555
      @grahammcfadyenhill9555 2 года назад

      Well, after all, you were working in Dublin. I can assure you that there is no shortage of the "particularly thick" in Ireland. See, that's how it's done.

  • @MrsDesiremore
    @MrsDesiremore 2 года назад +61

    Let's stick a pin in this for now - can also mean: let's preserve our energy and deal with this challenging thing later. It works well when trying to diffuse a conflict. I think it's a great practice when you need to prioritise an urgent matter over a corrective action which can wait

    • @ryanb9873
      @ryanb9873 2 года назад

      LOL no. Do you also think the tooth fairy is real?

    • @thrillereighties8241
      @thrillereighties8241 2 года назад +2

      I find "let's stick a pin in this for now" very arrogant. It is a patronizing way someone will tell others they have seniority and authority and he or she is killing an argument or idea right there and then. It is typically used by people who like the sound of their own voice and have an overinflated opinion of themselves. It is a nice way to say you don't matter, just shut up already.

  • @whitewave09
    @whitewave09 2 года назад +19

    All super common in Canada and I see non-native English speakers getting trapped by this all the time. Thank you for this.

    • @va3ngc
      @va3ngc 2 года назад +2

      The only one I haven't seen here in Canada is "stick a pin in it". Also I think people here also always universally use "Regards" to end an email. The rest seem to informal.

  • @EnglishwithAntara
    @EnglishwithAntara 2 года назад +9

    Also the phrase 'Thanks in advance.' It pretty much means that you’re expecting them to do whatever you’re asking, and they pretty much have to do it.

    • @EtherealSunset
      @EtherealSunset Месяц назад +3

      Sometimes, but not always. I sometimes use it if I know the person reading it will have to do something, but I don't know if I'll ever get the opportunity to thank them later as if I email a second time, it may be a different person and I want to make sure they're thanked for helping me.

  • @ACGreyhound04
    @ACGreyhound04 2 года назад +4

    My cousin, who is an American living and working in London, recently told me that if a British colleague says that your work is “fine”, what they really mean is that it’s terrible, and probably should be re-done.

  • @lukass1700
    @lukass1700 2 года назад +46

    Passive aggression is a sign of possessing a subordinate role within a hierarchy (child-parents or at the work). The earlier you realize the better, so you can step out.

    • @liarunaway
      @liarunaway 2 года назад +16

      Right!? I watched the video and felt so triggered and I just stopped watching. I don’t want to become like this nor do I want surround myself to people like this.

    • @ashton1952
      @ashton1952 2 года назад +5

      Lukas S absolutely agree; when people have to resort to this instead of just having the courage to be direct

    • @raapyna8544
      @raapyna8544 2 года назад +4

      The worst thing is, when I'm being direct and people assume I'm being passive-aggressive, because other people would only say such things sarcastically. I'm trying to be genuine and kind and people assume I hate them. 😅 I don't know if this is a problem with the society, or if I'm using my tone of voice wrong or something about my face

    • @ashton1952
      @ashton1952 2 года назад

      @@raapyna8544 just smile more 😅 could be a tone situation; your tone being perfectly normal for you but it sounds snarkyish to someone from another culture/language background, especially if it's a call/messages and they can't see your face

  • @marcuswilson007
    @marcuswilson007 2 года назад +5

    Watching this confirms my life choice to run my own business. I kindly say exactly what I mean and people take me as I am or just don't do business with me.

  • @YourNickIsTaken
    @YourNickIsTaken 2 года назад +20

    Very British Problems :
    Removing the "kind" from "kind regards" to let the recipient know you're absolutely bloody livid. 1:45 PM · Apr 10, 2015

  • @DarthIckus
    @DarthIckus 2 года назад +4

    I like the use of saying "take care" to customers and workmates, particularly on the phone. It's as good as saying "f*ck off!"

    • @leaannpedigo8944
      @leaannpedigo8944 6 месяцев назад +1

      Somethings clearly going on in your head. I don’t think that people should ever be pushed Somethings clearly going on in your head. I don’t think that people should ever be pushed to this point. But it does happen more today than ever in history. Especially these young people out
      Their pretty much have no boundaries I see a lot of this same thing with raising their kids people tell their kids everything by the time they’re 12 they start acting out all the stuff they have learned from home then parents
      friends then certain family members that act or think the same way.

  • @jimistorm
    @jimistorm 2 года назад +62

    I occasionally use these phrases although I do not intend being passive aggressive. I am curious how a native speaker perceives these phrases if he knows that the sender is not a native English speaker?

    • @kosmas7713
      @kosmas7713 2 года назад +5

      I'm also curious about that

    • @azhivago2296
      @azhivago2296 2 года назад +26

      Ignore her - I'm British and her analysis is utterly cynical and glass-half-empty.

    • @hyunjinsfadedamericanostai3431
      @hyunjinsfadedamericanostai3431 2 года назад +13

      @@azhivago2296 Ikr but she's already mentioned in the comment section that this video is slightly exaggerated for entertainment purpose. She isn't that serious.

    • @KBinturong
      @KBinturong 2 года назад +16

      It’s the context that matters. In her examples it’s easy to spot that the person is playing on words. In other context it’s not that harsh and used to ease what we have to say.

    • @w.rhiannonm.4347
      @w.rhiannonm.4347 2 года назад

      @@azhivago2296 It's funny!

  • @Andreschannel_SA
    @Andreschannel_SA Месяц назад +2

    I listened to every one of these fourteen passive aggressive phrases, and can't believe you went through them all without a single expletive in your explanations. Good job. Thank you.

  • @Indy_at_the_beach
    @Indy_at_the_beach 2 года назад +8

    "Circle back", "reach out" "actionable" and other words and phrases popularized in business schools push my button. Straightforward speech is more authentic and can still be used in a manner that does not insult or attack the listener.

    • @resourcedragon
      @resourcedragon 2 года назад +1

      And "take carriage of" and "hit the ground running". Yes, those phrases rub me up the wrong way too.

    • @l0remipsum991
      @l0remipsum991 Год назад

      Corporate people love their smarmy BS and often they feel 'smart' about it. You'll get punished however if you're being too honest.

  • @grahammcfadyenhill9555
    @grahammcfadyenhill9555 2 года назад +47

    When I end a note or letter with "Regards", what I really mean is "Get Stuffed". In this case I am in total agreement with Lucy. For example, my genteel Irish mother used terms like "striking" or "breathtaking" to describe some women. What she really meant was "uglier than a mud fence" or "she has been struck in the face by an entire load of lumber". She was a very kind woman.

    • @gregvanpaassen
      @gregvanpaassen 2 года назад +8

      My mother used to use "charming" ironically: "what a charming man". But said with an unironic inflection, so you had to pay attention.

    • @antikrabe8646
      @antikrabe8646 2 года назад +2

      What about "best regards"? Is it like "kind regards" or something?

    • @bsteven885
      @bsteven885 2 года назад

      I sometimes use the word "incredible" to hide my disgust or other negative feelings about someone or something.

  • @mikoajswiety8149
    @mikoajswiety8149 2 года назад +18

    I use some of these phrases REALLY MEANING what I say (Eg. "It seems there's been a misunderstanding". I did not know that you can understand it in any other way. And now you tell me that I was rude because my English interlocutor understood something that I have not say). I wonder if you could provide us with phrases which we can use instead those, so that our interlocutor understands that there really has been a misunderstanding (sorry for my English, it is very poor).

    • @deeskaggs4087
      @deeskaggs4087 2 года назад +3

      just say “I don’t get it.”

    • @guntramblohm4179
      @guntramblohm4179 2 года назад +4

      Poor language skills give you some leeway, or at least plausible deniability.

    • @DieezahArts
      @DieezahArts 2 года назад

      If I say " It seems there's been a misunderstanding..." in most contexts it means "How could you be that dumb?" or "You already have the relevant information, how come you're not tak8ng it into account?" and it works for social media comments in professional groups as well as for PMs who still insist on sending me Canadian French translation projects right after being reminded they have my info on file and that this is not one of my working language variants...

  • @revenge425
    @revenge425 2 года назад +10

    passive aggressiviness just fly out of my head... I am so dense that people need to tell me directly if I have done something wrong 😅

    • @lemsip207
      @lemsip207 Месяц назад

      Then, when you use these phrases but you actually mean what you say people take it the wrong way. So if you genuinely want to discuss something later and say so, the other person is surprised when you do.

  • @ColinHarvey78
    @ColinHarvey78 2 года назад +27

    Love it. I always regard “warmest regards” with suspicion - it either means the writer is A Bit Odd or a snake, maybe both.
    Watch also for the punctuation when signing off an email. A full stop after someone’s name (especially if they don’t normally) is a sign of extreme displeasure. E.g.
    Regards
    Colin.
    Means “I am so f**king angry with you it’s lucky we’re not in the same room”. 😂😇

    • @xXJ4FARGAMERXx
      @xXJ4FARGAMERXx 2 года назад +8

      Wtf just a simple typo or autocorrect can lead to this much hate??

    • @Boogeymanjw
      @Boogeymanjw 2 года назад +1

      @@xXJ4FARGAMERXx yea thats scuffed...

    • @JOHNTHEWHISK
      @JOHNTHEWHISK Месяц назад +3

      I love the American "thanks for reaching out" which is a fairly recent invention. What it really means is "thanks for being a f*cking nuisance"

    • @O2life
      @O2life Месяц назад +2

      As an American, I'd take a neutral American "regards" over a saccharine "warmest regards" any day! "Warmest regards" reads like a threat.

  • @TheHgk1
    @TheHgk1 Месяц назад +1

    Thank you very much Lucy. I've never worked in the UK - in fact, I've never even been to the UK. And your video was the best motivation for me not to change anything in the future.

  • @craidiefin
    @craidiefin 2 года назад +6

    "With all due respect, of which there is none"
    Is how I've understood that one.

    • @C.I366
      @C.I366 Месяц назад

      With all due respect...I don't like what you did, but don't want to offend you.

  • @KarlXiao18
    @KarlXiao18 2 года назад +2

    I tend to avoid using "regards" to end my e-mail, because I somehow suspect that this word has a meaning of "bugger off". Now this video just confirms my suspicion. This also explains why the few times I used this word in my e-mails, they always not went well.

  • @mowuvz3672
    @mowuvz3672 Месяц назад +4

    With so many immigrants now working UK, British people rather change their communication style so that it is clear, concise and unambiguous. Otherwise they will one day discover rest of the world saying British people don't understand English 😀

  • @TripsandFeasts1
    @TripsandFeasts1 6 дней назад +2

    I remember my girlfriend telling a colleague that she’d just lost her grandmother. At the end of the conversation, the colleague said “I hope you find your grandmother soon!!!”

  • @ashikihsan1946
    @ashikihsan1946 2 года назад +3

    Lucy, I love these clarification words of you in Business English. That is good for me to learn to deal with anyone in business or in daily life. Learning English from you is precious for me Lucy

  • @phil4986
    @phil4986 2 года назад +1

    This video was alot of fun.
    Clearly ,at one time or another,you have had to use all of these phrases.
    Your expression betraying your memory of how those few people genuinely deserved it ,was priceless.

  • @unbelievable1983
    @unbelievable1983 2 года назад +2

    This is the foundation of diplomacy.

  • @Diskutierholz
    @Diskutierholz 2 года назад +2

    Thanks for the video, it was very interesting! After working for 7 years for an international company I just can say... you're completely right, Lucy! But what I experienced is that even the german colleagues use a lot of these phrases in their conversations or meetings, of course in german language but the same words in meaning. Funny about this is that it didn't matter if you were a colleague from the management or just one of our regular employees.

  • @joyc9844
    @joyc9844 2 года назад +9

    I really appreciate the timeframes you put on your videos it makes it easy to navigate

  • @robread-jones3698
    @robread-jones3698 2 года назад +1

    I've used 'Regards' for many years without knowing this. Armed with this newly acquired knowledge, in future, I shall ensure I continue to use 'Regards'.

  • @videosaleatoriosdorb7050
    @videosaleatoriosdorb7050 2 года назад +47

    "Jargon: specialized language, employed with the purpose to *exclude* other people".
    The words that I was looking for!
    Thank you A LOT, Lucy!

  • @messinalyle4030
    @messinalyle4030 2 года назад +8

    I would anticipate that it could potentially confuse a person who was learning English as a second language to imply that this video would be helpful for anyone who "wants to move to an English-speaking country." Because not all of the expressions you mentioned necessarily have those meanings in all English speaking countries. It might be more accurate to say that these phrases have these meanings in the UK, and particularly in the corporate world.
    And obviously, whether or not some of these phrases should be interpreted as having such a passive-agressive meaning should depend on other context clues, such as what you know of the personality and the current emotional state of the person using them.

    • @DieezahArts
      @DieezahArts 2 года назад

      And in my experience, the way they're being used to hide (barely) feelings that aren't deemed socially acceptable may vary from one British city to the next and even from one type of corporate space to the next.

  • @Patrick462
    @Patrick462 2 года назад +8

    I though I was the master of the backhand compliment and passive aggressive communication, but Lucy you take it to the next level.
    I will say by the second half of my career I started just saying my "true thoughts" without the sugar coating, beating around the bush passive aggression.

  • @orchiddo1
    @orchiddo1 2 года назад +2

    That's implications. And this lesson guides us to understand these ones easily and correctly. It's wonderful.

  • @azhersamin3387
    @azhersamin3387 2 года назад +144

    In the next video, you should discuss the alternatives about those phrases. It'll be helpful for the learners who want to learn English. By the way, I appreciate your work.

    • @jessygt4414
      @jessygt4414 2 года назад +1

      Thanks for setting up the schedule.

    • @hydrolito
      @hydrolito 2 года назад

      Americans say two weeks vacation or two weeks off they don't say two weeks holiday unless it is a holiday period such as over Christmas and New Year's, when school is out is called Christmas vacation.

  • @johnjkiwi7818
    @johnjkiwi7818 Месяц назад +1

    Hi Lucy.
    Another common business phrase is:
    "Your objection or input is noted". meaning it will be completely ignored
    and no further action will be taken.

  • @Stoy-boy
    @Stoy-boy 2 года назад +3

    I absolutely love this. 😂 I giggled and nodded throughout. So relatable to anyone who has ever worked in an office. I am so guilty of typing "Regards" when I want to actually get off my desk and go strangle the person I'm emailing. 🤣

  • @dariakatarzyna2836
    @dariakatarzyna2836 Месяц назад

    I just remembered that only a few days ago, I ended an email with a single ‘regards’ and I think I did it intuitively because I was really angry with the addressee. I would like to point out that I am not an English speaker by birth, but I hope I sometimes feel a British vibe. Thank you for your video! I am your fan.

  • @like90
    @like90 2 года назад +8

    I do use “thanks for the input” and I literally mean that I’m thankful for their input and I plan on doing something about their concern.

    • @lemsip207
      @lemsip207 Месяц назад +1

      If I thought something was a ridiculous suggestion, I would rather say "I don't think so" rather than something like "Let's stick a pin in that." It's direct without being rude.

  • @emilybowne6043
    @emilybowne6043 2 года назад +2

    Omg, I've used some of those phrases in the past! My main one was: I'll put this under consideration. What I actually meant was never going to happen. Thanks for the video.
    Warmest regards 😸

  • @alessandropoleschi9642
    @alessandropoleschi9642 2 года назад +4

    This video is so accurate and truthful. With this said, I bloody hate passive aggressive language/attitude. I think it’s self- insulting. You’re not being polite; you just prove you don’t have the guts to speak your mind openly.

    • @lemsip207
      @lemsip207 Месяц назад +1

      Yes, you can be polite and straight at the same time. There is no need to resort to passive-aggressiveness.

  • @christianeaster2776
    @christianeaster2776 2 года назад +2

    I've actually used a lot these phrases when I was working as a problem solver for my last job. Especially, when the other person was being rather dense.

  • @alstaneva
    @alstaneva 2 года назад +8

    Thanks for this video. Had a lot of fun and laugh watching.
    Also the phrase ‘I appreciate your opinion’. I’m loving it and it’s nice to have a polite way of telling people you don’t really give a… care about their opinions 😂

  • @Mr_Fu_Manchu
    @Mr_Fu_Manchu 27 дней назад

    I am not an expert in British English but the meaning of so-called Brit business slang is crystal clear to me.

  • @beautifulcrazy
    @beautifulcrazy 2 года назад +3

    That's what I love about the English Language. We can be so passive aggressive, so standoffish, in such an aristocratic way, that the next person is not sure where we stand. It's always great to use to keep people at bay, especially at the office!

    • @Isleofskye
      @Isleofskye 2 года назад +1

      Yes and if they take offence then we play innocent and say "we didn't mean it that way!"....WE DID:)

  • @elmirakromskaya6853
    @elmirakromskaya6853 2 года назад +1

    Holy crap! Doing my nail care and listening to English with Lucy in order to optimise my time = focused on my plates and not following the caption. Catching that dramatised: 'It's important to avoid eating other people', getting instant dreads and shudder, subsequently fought off by the followed 's people sandwiches'. Epic! It can be spine-tingling... 😆

  • @cogitated
    @cogitated 2 года назад +6

    I tend to drop from “warm regards” to “sincerely” when I no longer feel those warm regards to the person I’m emailing.

    • @peterpain6625
      @peterpain6625 2 года назад +1

      Oh, getting out the dagger i see ;)

    • @cogitated
      @cogitated 2 года назад

      @@peterpain6625 and when I’m typing it - I always say it out loud through gritted teeth too!!!!

    • @peterpain6625
      @peterpain6625 2 года назад +2

      @@cogitated Had a colleague like that once. We had to donate for a "less loud" keyboard for him ;)

    • @cogitated
      @cogitated 2 года назад +1

      @@peterpain6625 thank goodness I work from home and no one can hear me!!!

    • @peterpain6625
      @peterpain6625 2 года назад +2

      @@cogitated That poor keyboard ;)

  • @funeupizzerino5413
    @funeupizzerino5413 Месяц назад +1

    Omg. I just recognise that germans really really communicate different.
    I repectfully disagree with most of your statements. This means for me: i fully respect you and your opinion, but my opinion is different. Thank you for this eye opener.

  • @yellowcatmonkey
    @yellowcatmonkey Год назад +1

    i was hesitant to watch the lesson at first but i loved how non-toxic it turned out to be 😸💖good thing toxicity is quickly remedied by kindness 🌻poor souls that stuck in an endless sarcasm cycle really need a break.. it's such a noxious habit that sucks the life out of its host 🙈thank you lucy for the useful vocab and a funny approach 💖😸

  • @like-dracula-but-nice
    @like-dracula-but-nice 2 года назад +2

    Not necessarily business language but passive aggressive and quite common in the office setting. The biggest cultural shock for me was people saying "God bless" when they basically mean "go f yourself"

  • @oleksandrfesenko5975
    @oleksandrfesenko5975 Месяц назад

    Thank you for the video! Turns out I am passive aggressive in my emails ending with ‘Regards’. Had no clue and nobody, even my friends, pointed that out to me. Changing my signature right now! Cheers!

  • @steviebarrett
    @steviebarrett 2 года назад +7

    This video is too funny because it's absolutely spot on! I have heard and said pretty much all of these during my working life.

  • @CJFCarlsson
    @CJFCarlsson 2 года назад

    I for one appreciate the attempts to keep any conversation polite.

  • @patienceowusuwiredu375
    @patienceowusuwiredu375 2 года назад +98

    The “regards” bit got me laughing. I do that a lot without knowledge of it's passivity😂 Thanks, Lucy. I enjoyed this lesson too.

    • @billdavies6463
      @billdavies6463 2 года назад +23

      And so do I, and many other people. It only causes offence if you believe those that claim it is aggressive, which it is not.

    • @daless3526
      @daless3526 2 года назад +13

      @@billdavies6463 I use it all the time in emails. Hope nobody is thinking I am telling them off.

    • @kme3894
      @kme3894 2 года назад +2

      what about kind regards, is that bad?

    • @mothwaltz4163
      @mothwaltz4163 2 года назад +2

      @@kme3894 Lucy mentioned that "kind regards" means "You're ok. We're good".

    • @Geedz806
      @Geedz806 2 года назад +4

      I tend to use them ironically - the angrier I am the warmer my regards

  • @tangerhouse8683
    @tangerhouse8683 2 года назад +1

    Here in my non-native English country... if the speaker says something and means entirely opposite like in many examples quoted here.. we consider that person as (1) toxic or (2) don't know what he/she wants or (3) don't have the guts to speak his/her mind.

  • @andrewjones575
    @andrewjones575 2 года назад +19

    If a woman says to a man "you're a nice guy", that means she finds him boring & unattractive. A woman saying "you're a nice guy" is almost always followed by a rejection. "You're a nice guy, but you're not my type", "You're a nice guy but I'm not into nice guys", "You're a nice guy & you'll find someone some day". It's never "You're a nice guy, let's jump straight into bed together".

    • @Alastair_
      @Alastair_ 2 года назад +4

      "You're a nice guy, why can't I find any nice guys like you!?"
      *Me standing there wondering wtf is going on

    • @TheCimbrianBull
      @TheCimbrianBull 2 года назад

      @@Alastair_ in that case she's not worth your time!

    • @Deja-woowoo
      @Deja-woowoo 22 дня назад

      She needs to be careful about her words so she doesn't get murdered. But let's blame women cool?

  • @evaag
    @evaag 2 года назад +2

    OMG!!!! 😱 Do you know how many times I ended my emails with 'Regards' to my Irish manager.... Now I understand many of her emails answers. ...