This really spoke to me. I am usually very direct with most people and most of time did not care about feelings, now learning how to craft my messages more better considering their feelings and getting better results and less arguments.
I am glad the video was so useful to you. I am generally direct and I have found being diplomatic a very useful counterbalance ... hope it works as well for you. J
This really helped, I grew up in a generation of direct leadership now as my career advances in this new generation I have to have diplomatic answers and statements.
Packaging your message in a more persuasive and palatable form. I really like this statement. I have a strong conviction about being truthful. And my boss has been asking me to be more diplomatic in some of my communication to our clients to not create unnecessary alarm in them. I was wrestling with some of the suggested replies he had given me because if I were to say it that way, it feels like I am being dishonest. But, this perspective, that diplomacy is not about being dishonest but packaging in a way that is winning, is a very helpful paradigm shift. Thank you!
great video and brilliant speaking style, i appreciate the effort . do you have any suggestions on books to read to understand diplomacy and how to practice it ?
Glad you found the video useful and thanks for your compliments. "Never split the difference" by Chris Voss is really good - it is about negotiation but there is a lot in there which is very useful in being diplomatic.
I have a person who doesn't like me at work. And, when someone else says something they shouldn't, and I reply or join the convo after they started talking about things they shouldn't say... but I ended up replying to something in a way i didn't mean, they report that I was the person doing everything wrong.... when they were, so I basically ended up trying to be a part of a team conversation when several others were wrong for their conversation, and the minute I say anything they can try to make come off worse than theirs, they try to get me in trouble for the whole conversation.... idk how to fix that misinterpretation, or the personal biased they have to make everything my fault when it's not
Hi Renee - having a few people looking to make you look bad is a tough situation to be in. As hard as it might be, may I suggest you don't join in the conversation when they are discussing topics "they shouldn't say". This limits what they can use against you. When you are in these conversations, try to think about what you plan to say before saying it and ask yourself "How might this be used by them?". Easy to say and not so easy to do - do try as it will help. In addition to this, perhaps marketing yourself and the good things you are doing at work in as natural way as possible to your boss and others would help too. enhance.training/lm-lp/market-internally-booklet/
@@Enhancetraining I’m gonna be binge-watching this channel and real all your comment responses as they are brilliant and a total breakthrough for me. I’m blunt. It’s an obstacle now.
Hey Jess, here's one I recently stuggled with "I'd suggest making changes to your resume to better fit the role you are looking for", somehow I feel it still offended the person
Hi, If the person is sensitive, then it can be really useful to start with questions - "How closely do you think the skills and experience showing on your CV matches what the employer needs? Will there be other candidates that are showing a better match? What could you do to close this gap?" Using leading questions gets them thinking rather than reacting to your statement. You can always follow up with a statement afterwards.
@@Enhancetraining omg this is so brilliant 😮 I never would have thought of this 😢 I’m Russian and extremely straightforward which I’d like to fix asap.
Straightforward is fine with people that are used to it or happy with it. When you meet people that are not fine with it, having a few different approaches makes a big difference to them (and you).
My manager is extremely bossy when I provide him ideas he just tries to silences me. He says you have to do what I say. He thinks I’m good and tries to limit me to open up. He insults me during the team meeting. I have conveyed him multiple times before to be respectful, but he never changed. I’m really done with him and want to escalate because it’s effecting me mentally. Please advise how to handle this diplomatically.
@Johnwick19942 - from your description it sounds like your manager is intimidated by you or fearful of you. Have you tried to make your manager look good and refrain from showing they up? If you want to esclate, it would be worth you watching this video first ruclips.net/video/xnAHpRtFZfU/видео.html. And this one is on dealing with bullying (which seems to be exactly what your manager is doing from what your write). ruclips.net/video/k9CykoXmx9M/видео.html J
@careergeek17 - I am assuming that you are talking to your boss. I would go with something like: "I feel uncomfortable taking the meeting instead of you. I believe the other attendees are expecting and wanting you to attend. Don't you think this meeting is a good opportunity for you to ... (insert benefits or what you expect them to be doing an example might be "set direction for the next steps on xxx project"). J
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This really spoke to me. I am usually very direct with most people and most of time did not care about feelings, now learning how to craft my messages more better considering their feelings and getting better results and less arguments.
I am glad the video was so useful to you. I am generally direct and I have found being diplomatic a very useful counterbalance ... hope it works as well for you. J
This really helped, I grew up in a generation of direct leadership now as my career advances in this new generation I have to have diplomatic answers and statements.
@NickPatron I am glad you found this lesson useful. Being diplomatic has been extremely useful to me over my career.
Packaging your message in a more persuasive and palatable form. I really like this statement. I have a strong conviction about being truthful. And my boss has been asking me to be more diplomatic in some of my communication to our clients to not create unnecessary alarm in them. I was wrestling with some of the suggested replies he had given me because if I were to say it that way, it feels like I am being dishonest. But, this perspective, that diplomacy is not about being dishonest but packaging in a way that is winning, is a very helpful paradigm shift. Thank you!
Glad it was so useful for you. J
Exactly the same challenge I am facing! Well put
I love it 🥰
It can help me to improve my communication skills at work
Glad you found it so useful. J
Thanks for the great advice. As a straightforward individual, I will keep practicing those skills.
Glad you found the video useful. Keep practicing. Diplomacy is such a useful skill to be good at in the workplace. J
great video and brilliant speaking style, i appreciate the effort .
do you have any suggestions on books to read to understand diplomacy and how to practice it ?
Glad you found the video useful and thanks for your compliments. "Never split the difference" by Chris Voss is really good - it is about negotiation but there is a lot in there which is very useful in being diplomatic.
I have no idea how to even begin speaking in a tone of voice like yours… but I want to learn!
Just messaged you on LinkedIn. Thank you, Jess.
Thanks Anna for your message.
I have a person who doesn't like me at work. And, when someone else says something they shouldn't, and I reply or join the convo after they started talking about things they shouldn't say... but I ended up replying to something in a way i didn't mean, they report that I was the person doing everything wrong.... when they were, so I basically ended up trying to be a part of a team conversation when several others were wrong for their conversation, and the minute I say anything they can try to make come off worse than theirs, they try to get me in trouble for the whole conversation.... idk how to fix that misinterpretation, or the personal biased they have to make everything my fault when it's not
Hi Renee - having a few people looking to make you look bad is a tough situation to be in. As hard as it might be, may I suggest you don't join in the conversation when they are discussing topics "they shouldn't say". This limits what they can use against you. When you are in these conversations, try to think about what you plan to say before saying it and ask yourself "How might this be used by them?". Easy to say and not so easy to do - do try as it will help. In addition to this, perhaps marketing yourself and the good things you are doing at work in as natural way as possible to your boss and others would help too. enhance.training/lm-lp/market-internally-booklet/
@@Enhancetraining I’m gonna be binge-watching this channel and real all your comment responses as they are brilliant and a total breakthrough for me. I’m blunt. It’s an obstacle now.
Thanks for your comments. I hope the content continues to help you.
Hey Jess, here's one I recently stuggled with "I'd suggest making changes to your resume to better fit the role you are looking for", somehow I feel it still offended the person
Hi, If the person is sensitive, then it can be really useful to start with questions - "How closely do you think the skills and experience showing on your CV matches what the employer needs? Will there be other candidates that are showing a better match? What could you do to close this gap?" Using leading questions gets them thinking rather than reacting to your statement. You can always follow up with a statement afterwards.
@@Enhancetraining omg this is so brilliant 😮 I never would have thought of this 😢 I’m Russian and extremely straightforward which I’d like to fix asap.
Straightforward is fine with people that are used to it or happy with it. When you meet people that are not fine with it, having a few different approaches makes a big difference to them (and you).
My manager is extremely bossy when I provide him ideas he just tries to silences me. He says you have to do what I say. He thinks I’m good and tries to limit me to open up. He insults me during the team meeting. I have conveyed him multiple times before to be respectful, but he never changed. I’m really done with him and want to escalate because it’s effecting me mentally. Please advise how to handle this diplomatically.
@Johnwick19942 - from your description it sounds like your manager is intimidated by you or fearful of you. Have you tried to make your manager look good and refrain from showing they up? If you want to esclate, it would be worth you watching this video first ruclips.net/video/xnAHpRtFZfU/видео.html. And this one is on dealing with bullying (which seems to be exactly what your manager is doing from what your write). ruclips.net/video/k9CykoXmx9M/видео.html J
@@Enhancetraining thank you very much both the videos were very helpful.
You are very welcome.
How to say
“ I don’t want to take meetings on your behalf. As CTO this is our expectation that you will be managing your team directly “
@careergeek17 - I am assuming that you are talking to your boss. I would go with something like: "I feel uncomfortable taking the meeting instead of you. I believe the other attendees are expecting and wanting you to attend. Don't you think this meeting is a good opportunity for you to ... (insert benefits or what you expect them to be doing an example might be "set direction for the next steps on xxx project"). J
❤
Thank you.
טיפים מבריקים
You are welcome
Hi
Thanks for your comment