Yesss. Me too. And then my mum gets mad at me. Saying “you look happy. You act happy, so why would you do this!?” And when I try and explain it, she’s like “that’s not true and so stupid”
I really recognize this, for me it became a addiction and it was just a part of my daily routine. Something as normal as brushing your teeth so I didn’t have to feel sad or even a bit bad to do it. Pretty recovered now but I keep fighting and I know I can get there
I feel like this sometimes when something good happens or I'm happy or something I feel weird like I'm supposed to feel sad I cant be happy, the one thing those goes through my head is "are u really depressed depressed people dont act or feel this way, your not actually depressed your just over exaggerating, ur faking
ToxicFurs Trust me boo, this happens and ik it’s strange but in no way are u faking it. I promise. I have been through stuff like this and am suffering from the same things u are. You aren’t alone. Sometimes we are happy and the thing abt depression is it’s continuous episodes or long time of emptiness or sadness sorta. But in between doesn’t mean u can’t be happy. It happens and just try to make the most out of it while u can and don’t over think. Just live your happy moment. 😊
its 3 am for me but this is the earliest ive ever been to a vid! i totally relate to this, i often self harm when im not down because im addicted, not necessarily because of my mood.
Thanks for explaining this to me I always thought I was a faker but then I’d always get caught on the question why would I do this to my self if I was a faker.
I always hated myself and have the Feeling that I am a bad Person and dont Deserve to be happy. So everytime i feel Joy or happyness or just not feel as bad as i do normally i start to feel the need to punish myself for it because i dont Deserve to be happy and this often leads to selfharm. So yea happyness is sometimes one of the hardest feelings to deal with
i feel the same... sometimes i do mistakes but its okay to do mistakes, than the stupid voice in my head says go punish yourself your loser, you are such on bad person you deserve it. And sometimes i am happy and think i dont deserve it like you sayed. Its cool to read this comments then i don't feel alone anymore, a long time ago i feel like a freak...
I know that this is a video posted a long time ago, but I just realized that it wasn't just me. I hate when I'm happy because I feel like I'm faking. This was comforting to say the least. This video was recommended at the perfect time and I'm so glad for it
This is so helpful. I do sometimes when I’m feeling normal. And latter I’m like “ I didn’t feel mad or sad am I just faking this am I being over dramatic” I don’t know but now this makes me feel better and like I’m not the only one
same... my fake friends know it and say that I am just seeking attention... and the know that my best friend is Chinese so they bully me by bullying my friend... they are one of the biggest reasons I started
I am glad that someone talks about this topic!! And I find the disclaimer also really important for those who did not experience something like this, no one should feel like a „bad“ selfharmer, every kind of selfharm is valid enough to seek help!
When I'm not sad/deppressed and I self harm its usually because I feel like I don't deserve to be happy so I punish myself by cutting my thighs and shoulder, but the addiction part is also a very big thing that adds to it.
Also what do mental health hospitals or facilities help with self harm? And how do you deal with all of that like trying to hide the fact you were there, and should you feel embarrassed as things like that?
I've been watching all of your videos lately. Life has gotten really bad and i know its wrong to self harm but for some reason i do it anyways. Thanks for helping me to understand this more, good to know theres someone who cares about the tough times we have ❤
Omg.. I felt I was the only one feeling these emotions, and it really feeds into the hopelessness feeling I have. I’ve never heard anyone talk about this. Thank you so much 💛 I find it so incredibly hard doing positive things for myself, because I just know I have to hurt myself afterwards so make up for it. For some reason it felt good hearing someone say they feel the same way, so maybe it is the illness and not just “me”.
same, we are not alone... But the media dont talk about this so often. Thats the problem. Shes realy good and a such sweetheart. I dont feel alone anymore ore like a freak. When i was 16 yars old i was in a class with 2 students there hade the same selfharm problem. I was like i feel sorry for them and know i have the same problems. I hope in the future the people talking more about mentall ilnesses so that people like us dont feel alone & ashamed anymore.
I LOVE how you're able to address everything and talk so openly about stuff I was feeling very very ashamed of. Self-harm is so taboo.. It's only ever presented as a symptom of something, and never goes into the details, bc it's too 'sordid' or smthg... l am currently struggling with this at this moment, doing it when I supposedly feel fine. This video speaks a lot, it made me cry When I first found out your chanel, I didn't think I would resonnate so much with your content. I knew I self-harmed, but I didn't realise how a big deal and a part of my life it was. For real, I have been following a lot mental health content but I think yours has been the most helpful so far. Like; i am not alone anymore!!! So thank you thank you thank you thank you for your work ❤❤
Thank you for making this video. I have always struggled with this topic and I always thought it was bizarre and that I was alone. It made me feel like a pathetic mess, so thank you for bringing light on this issue. Also, your voice is lovely! Everything you said articulated what I've been so confused by, so well.
my self harm is mostly a visual thing, its weird, since i was 12 turning 13 when my mental health went to complete and utter hell i’ve been in love with dark shit. i loved ahs and suicide and self harm docs, recently i started watching drug addiction docs as well. and googling “self harm gifs” and i have a self harm tumblr where i just reblog corny shit from 2013. so self harm is just something that i find.... aesthetically pleasing?? if that makes sense but it is an emotional thing too and i like the stinging feeling. i use it to punish myself sometimes, when i get super angry or super depressed and suicidal i’ll do it. sometimes im too depressed to even do it because i feel so weak lmao. idk to me its a dirty little dark secret and i like that feeling.
i only self harm when i am happy. i mean i only do things that i know will have a positive effect on my mood; like drugs, listening to certain music, or self harm when i am already in a good mood. Otherwise that might lead to addiction, and i really dont want that.
hm. ok now that i think about it, it depends on the method. There are certain self harm things i only do when i am sad, and some i only do when i am happy. Interesting.
Nah for me like my mood changes and if something bad happened that day/ I was upset before I will still want to sh even when I feel ok just coz. Also I used to plan it when I am upset to do it on a certain day/ at a certain time or whatever ( say I was upset at school and planned to do it at home) and by then I'd be feeling ok but I just did it anyways because I planned it and I didn't want to back out coz I felt like I just needed to. Idk I hope this makes sense and that I'm not the only one.
This is so frustrating, like I feel completely fine and then there’s just that urge.
Yesss. Me too. And then my mum gets mad at me. Saying “you look happy. You act happy, so why would you do this!?” And when I try and explain it, she’s like “that’s not true and so stupid”
I completely understand
@@noellll3903 i understand that my mum is like that then makes excuses to act like im perfect
it’s just straight up addicting
I really recognize this, for me it became a addiction and it was just a part of my daily routine. Something as normal as brushing your teeth so I didn’t have to feel sad or even a bit bad to do it. Pretty recovered now but I keep fighting and I know I can get there
I feel like this sometimes when something good happens or I'm happy or something I feel weird like I'm supposed to feel sad I cant be happy, the one thing those goes through my head is "are u really depressed depressed people dont act or feel this way, your not actually depressed your just over exaggerating, ur faking
ToxicFurs Trust me boo, this happens and ik it’s strange but in no way are u faking it. I promise. I have been through stuff like this and am suffering from the same things u are. You aren’t alone. Sometimes we are happy and the thing abt depression is it’s continuous episodes or long time of emptiness or sadness sorta. But in between doesn’t mean u can’t be happy. It happens and just try to make the most out of it while u can and don’t over think. Just live your happy moment. 😊
That exact same thing happens to me
Me too except for me its anxiety and depression
Thank you sm everyone for saying all this. I feel much less alone in my mentally ill weirdness
me too
its 3 am for me but this is the earliest ive ever been to a vid! i totally relate to this, i often self harm when im not down because im addicted, not necessarily because of my mood.
Thanks for explaining this to me I always thought I was a faker but then I’d always get caught on the question why would I do this to my self if I was a faker.
I always hated myself and have the Feeling that I am a bad Person and dont Deserve to be happy. So everytime i feel Joy or happyness or just not feel as bad as i do normally i start to feel the need to punish myself for it because i dont Deserve to be happy and this often leads to selfharm. So yea happyness is sometimes one of the hardest feelings to deal with
i feel the same... sometimes i do mistakes but its okay to do mistakes, than the stupid voice in my head says go punish yourself your loser, you are such on bad person you deserve it. And sometimes i am happy and think i dont deserve it like you sayed. Its cool to read this comments then i don't feel alone anymore, a long time ago i feel like a freak...
I know that this is a video posted a long time ago, but I just realized that it wasn't just me. I hate when I'm happy because I feel like I'm faking. This was comforting to say the least. This video was recommended at the perfect time and I'm so glad for it
Oop- forgot to bring my serotonin to this vid.
@Emma Rector
same. PROZAC CHECK 👌
i love sushi same. Lamictal check-
Emma Rector lol i used to take Lamictal!
I love sushi twinzies
This is so helpful. I do sometimes when I’m feeling normal. And latter I’m like “ I didn’t feel mad or sad am I just faking this am I being over dramatic” I don’t know but now this makes me feel better and like I’m not the only one
same... my fake friends know it and say that I am just seeking attention... and the know that my best friend is Chinese so they bully me by bullying my friend... they are one of the biggest reasons I started
I am glad that someone talks about this topic!! And I find the disclaimer also really important for those who did not experience something like this, no one should feel like a „bad“ selfharmer, every kind of selfharm is valid enough to seek help!
When I'm not sad/deppressed and I self harm its usually because I feel like I don't deserve to be happy so I punish myself by cutting my thighs and shoulder, but the addiction part is also a very big thing that adds to it.
Whenever im happy, i feel like i dont deserve it, so i look at self harm gifs to trigger myself into cutting :
I started watching your videos as a way to avoid self harm, so thank you for that, it has really helped
Great video Malika, really good topic that isn't often spoken about. I can definitely relate to this
Also what do mental health hospitals or facilities help with self harm? And how do you deal with all of that like trying to hide the fact you were there, and should you feel embarrassed as things like that?
I've been watching all of your videos lately. Life has gotten really bad and i know its wrong to self harm but for some reason i do it anyways. Thanks for helping me to understand this more, good to know theres someone who cares about the tough times we have ❤
Omg.. I felt I was the only one feeling these emotions, and it really feeds into the hopelessness feeling I have. I’ve never heard anyone talk about this. Thank you so much 💛 I find it so incredibly hard doing positive things for myself, because I just know I have to hurt myself afterwards so make up for it. For some reason it felt good hearing someone say they feel the same way, so maybe it is the illness and not just “me”.
same, we are not alone... But the media dont talk about this so often. Thats the problem. Shes realy good and a such sweetheart. I dont feel alone anymore ore like a freak. When i was 16 yars old i was in a class with 2 students there hade the same selfharm problem. I was like i feel sorry for them and know i have the same problems. I hope in the future the people talking more about mentall ilnesses so that people like us dont feel alone & ashamed anymore.
i do it sometimes when im bored and ik that's really bad but it just happens yk
This Video is so helpful, thanks a lot.
I LOVE how you're able to address everything and talk so openly about stuff I was feeling very very ashamed of. Self-harm is so taboo.. It's only ever presented as a symptom of something, and never goes into the details, bc it's too 'sordid' or smthg...
l am currently struggling with this at this moment, doing it when I supposedly feel fine. This video speaks a lot, it made me cry
When I first found out your chanel, I didn't think I would resonnate so much with your content. I knew I self-harmed, but I didn't realise how a big deal and a part of my life it was. For real, I have been following a lot mental health content but I think yours has been the most helpful so far. Like; i am not alone anymore!!! So thank you thank you thank you thank you for your work ❤❤
Thank you for making this video. I have always struggled with this topic and I always thought it was bizarre and that I was alone. It made me feel like a pathetic mess, so thank you for bringing light on this issue. Also, your voice is lovely! Everything you said articulated what I've been so confused by, so well.
Oooh thats sooooo true I feel so average but I still self harm
Ah I once felt so overwhelmed by the love I felt for my girlfriend that I relapsed after four months clean.
omg. thankyou so much for this video.
m surely one one os those people. u validated my feelings. thanksss alot
my self harm is mostly a visual thing, its weird, since i was 12 turning 13 when my mental health went to complete and utter hell i’ve been in love with dark shit. i loved ahs and suicide and self harm docs, recently i started watching drug addiction docs as well. and googling “self harm gifs” and i have a self harm tumblr where i just reblog corny shit from 2013. so self harm is just something that i find.... aesthetically pleasing?? if that makes sense but it is an emotional thing too and i like the stinging feeling. i use it to punish myself sometimes, when i get super angry or super depressed and suicidal i’ll do it. sometimes im too depressed to even do it because i feel so weak lmao. idk to me its a dirty little dark secret and i like that feeling.
i realised my sh was an addiction when i couldn't help yearning for the feeling of it
i only self harm when i am happy. i mean i only do things that i know will have a positive effect on my mood; like drugs, listening to certain music, or self harm when i am already in a good mood. Otherwise that might lead to addiction, and i really dont want that.
hm. ok now that i think about it, it depends on the method. There are certain self harm things i only do when i am sad, and some i only do when i am happy. Interesting.
I know this is not the topic but I wanted to tell you that you are beautiful :)
Oh damn I thought I was the only one
I relate to this
I love your vids
If you haven't already could u maybe do a video on trigger warnings? Tysm
I’ve had this....
Nah for me like my mood changes and if something bad happened that day/ I was upset before I will still want to sh even when I feel ok just coz. Also I used to plan it when I am upset to do it on a certain day/ at a certain time or whatever ( say I was upset at school and planned to do it at home) and by then I'd be feeling ok but I just did it anyways because I planned it and I didn't want to back out coz I felt like I just needed to. Idk I hope this makes sense and that I'm not the only one.
Reason 3 😞
I was 2 months free...shoot.
I was 666th like
Oh look I won a game of fortnite, I'm so happy I'ma cut.😂
Did that happen to you?
Thank you 💜 🙏 for all you share, Malika. ❤ Appreciate you. xx