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the fear of being seen is stopping you from living.

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  • Опубликовано: 31 янв 2024
  • the fear of being seen is stopping you from living. these thoughts were inspired by watching ‪@Gina.B‬ video, "Your FEAR OF BEING SEEN is holding you back | Overcome SELF SABOTAGE and CHANGE YOUR LIFE!" You can watch that here: • Your FEAR OF BEING SEE... . The fear of being seen is something a lot of us struggle with and it gets in the way of us fully living and living honestly.
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Комментарии • 97

  • @dusklvr
    @dusklvr 6 месяцев назад +23

    I'm afraid to be seen and harassed. I have alopecia and a bad skin rash on my head and people are cruel

    • @ariellejhines
      @ariellejhines 5 месяцев назад +8

      you are still beautiful🫶🏾

    • @AleciaRenece
      @AleciaRenece  4 месяца назад +12

      People definitely can be cruel. I am so sorry you experienced this. 🫂🌺🌻✨💛 Your fear is valid and I'm sending you so much love.

  • @MsBlackIntrovert
    @MsBlackIntrovert 6 месяцев назад +6

    It’s weird. My fear of being seen kept me from even clicking on this video for a bit because I knew it would spark some cognitive dissonance. It’s inspiring to hear others testimonies but when it hits I have to move toward change or I feel a level of discomfort I’m not used to. But they do say discomfort facilitates growth 😭

  • @shayacampbell4330
    @shayacampbell4330 6 месяцев назад +25

    It's crazy how I was meditating about this very thing while out for a walk today! I'm working hard to come to terms with my fear of vulnerability. While I often don't show it to others, I'm a highly sensitive person, so vulnerability seems too risky for me. People have used my insecurities and fears against me in the past, and this has taught me to hide a lot of who I am from others for the sake of "safety." I'm now growing to learn how to recognize people I can actually trust to handle my heart with care, and most of all, trust in my Creator to bring the right people into my life.

    • @Tommie710
      @Tommie710 5 месяцев назад +3

      I understand, I'm in the same place. 🫂🤎

  • @fracklov
    @fracklov 6 месяцев назад +20

    So good. .. “Pleasing was my survival tactic “
    As an almost 50 year old woman I can say you are speaking my exact language.
    A question.. one conclusion I came to was I was afraid of being attacked because I Know I had the capacity to fight back hard and that part of myself scared me . It is the fear of rejection and neglect but also the fear of being forced to be an assertive person in the moment. Right in the moment.

  • @zd1306
    @zd1306 6 месяцев назад +7

    I come from a family of 9 and I don’t feel seen! I’ve been ridiculed and it’s painful
    I will forever love myself and stay with God ✨

  • @tianipowell4254
    @tianipowell4254 3 месяца назад +5

    I spent my whole life going out of my way to be invisible. It felt so right and yet so wrong at the same time. Now I don’t know any other way to be, and feel a lot of shame and embarrassment when I am seen, though that’s exactly what I want.

  • @iismyalias
    @iismyalias 6 месяцев назад +18

    Alecia I was just thinking about this! The thing about being seen is primal. It almost looks like Maslows hierarchy of needs.
    Experiments done on babies showed they acted more fussy and distressed when the parents pretended to ignore them or not respond or interact in a positive way.
    In a way, others recognition of us, acknowledges our existence. We are spirits, not ghosts.
    I also think social constructs like racism and sexism (the -isms) contribute greatly to the fear of being seen bc it’s a negative consequence of being seen (in a certain way).
    Then there’s the stuff about beauty and attractiveness oh Lord that’s a BIG one that makes a lot of us want to hide. And as you said, internalizing the ideas.
    It all goes back the “not good enough” belief that’s rampant in human society. Thank you 🙏 for this video sis. Finger on the pulse!

    • @KayleneRomero-oz7yz
      @KayleneRomero-oz7yz 6 месяцев назад +6

      Also the subtle fear of "outshining the master" plays a role with interpersonal relationships amongst other women in your social group. Being afraid to look too pretty etc... Being pretty and "too confident" triggers other women's insecurities. I've often felt I had to downplay my confidence to make other women feel secure. Which led to me developing real insecurities and self-consciousness. Women want each other to not feel TOO confident. It an unspoken message communicated very loudly in many ways.

    • @iismyalias
      @iismyalias 6 месяцев назад +1

      @@KayleneRomero-oz7yz Yes!

  • @meerthemaker
    @meerthemaker 6 месяцев назад +19

    Alecia, who you are, what you say, and how you show up in the world is an absolute gift. Thank you for being you!

  • @nikoa.6474
    @nikoa.6474 6 месяцев назад +73

    I feel like being unworthy comes from certain beliefs in Christianity where it seems you have to earn worthiness.

    • @peachesandpoets
      @peachesandpoets 6 месяцев назад +18

      Born with sin. What a wild belief system.

    • @brigitteleafbarnes1441
      @brigitteleafbarnes1441 6 месяцев назад +1

      Rabbi Tovia Singer discusses this issue at length -- as a main tenet of (Paul's) Christianity -- that we need a Saviour
      vs in Tanakt (Torah) no need -- Sin is just "missing the mark" forgiveable and relationship with Hashem G-d is direct.

    • @citygurl0105
      @citygurl0105 6 месяцев назад +11

      There is no condemnation in Jesus Christ ... Whoever was teaching you that you had to prove yourself worthy, was incorrect. Just take the time to study and I pray you receive revelation of that. Relationship and not religion is the best practice. Have a good one ❤

    • @ancestorsleaves
      @ancestorsleaves 6 месяцев назад +12

      This is so true. It's like we have to go back into our subconscious to remove that conditioning

    • @bellanoire2271
      @bellanoire2271 6 месяцев назад +8

      “Relationship and not religion is the best practice!” I LOVE this! Not only because it’s 100% true but because my life completely changed for the better when Christ revealed to me how's these false teachings have led me and SO many others astray!

  • @lalat5899
    @lalat5899 6 месяцев назад +5

    This title, girl you ain’t lying 🫣

  • @alexiss8654
    @alexiss8654 6 месяцев назад +8

    I am struggling with this very issue right now. The timing is pure synchronicity.❤

  • @DiannaT
    @DiannaT 6 месяцев назад +12

    Alecia, you are living your truth out loud girl! Let's live our truth, whatever that may be🎉

  • @pamelapride2199
    @pamelapride2199 6 месяцев назад +10

    You are spot on as usual. In particular I really empathized with what you said about words hurting you. People say that words don’t hurt, but they can and oftentimes do. The Bible says that the power of life and death is in the tongue. Translation: what we say out of our mouths has the power to inflict pain in a major way! Alecia, keep being you and doing what you do inspiring others

  • @dynamicdivinereadings6520
    @dynamicdivinereadings6520 6 месяцев назад +6

    Don't stop posting ❤ u are helping a lot of people come back to themselves ❤😊

  • @ewadsworth
    @ewadsworth 6 месяцев назад +8

    Spot on again! This is my main underlying issue. Being seen in history and past has been unsafe. Working on it. Thank you for talking on it 🙏🏽

  • @MightyIntellectual
    @MightyIntellectual 20 дней назад +1

    Matthew 5 says YOU are the light of the world. YOU are the salt of the earth. Jesus even says A CITY SET ON A HILL CAN NOT BE HIDDEN. He also says that we should let our lights shine so that others can see our good works and glorify him!
    He gave us the confirmation we needed to come out of hiding. It is TIME family :)

  • @angexchoo1249
    @angexchoo1249 6 месяцев назад +4

    You are speaking to my soul bless you starseed ♥️

  • @Macchiato2398
    @Macchiato2398 6 месяцев назад +2

    I needed to hear this. For so long, in my experience, being seen was dangerous. Now that I'm safe, I'm fighting against the tendency to continue hiding, but to be seen so I can help others like me and be part of community. Thanks for this! Your words helped me so much you don't even know (your words are always helpful)! 🦋

  • @raeahthewriter8082
    @raeahthewriter8082 6 месяцев назад +4

    Alecia, I needed this. That little tangent you went on at the beginning about vetting and it not being my fault that I didn't see the red flags. I know that wasn't the point you meant to make in this video, but I'm choosing to believe God sent you on that tangent specifically for me. Thank you.

  • @Pjazz1
    @Pjazz1 6 месяцев назад +4

    Alecia this whole video got in my business 🤦🏾‍♀️

  • @Tanishaa231
    @Tanishaa231 6 месяцев назад +3

    This is so deep . Saving this video to come back to as a self love reminder .

  • @cassie9147
    @cassie9147 6 месяцев назад +5

    You hit the nail on the head with this one! Just came to this conclusion recently ❤

  • @Jess-yp9fo
    @Jess-yp9fo 13 дней назад

    I was raised by NARCS and basically abused my whole life so my fear of being seen is 100% understandable however im TiEEDD i relate to this vid 100% as well.

  • @iandiriri
    @iandiriri 6 месяцев назад +4

    Everything you say always speaks to me deeply. Thank you for being you. 💛

  • @Myazanae
    @Myazanae 6 месяцев назад +13

    So good! It’s time to show up, the world needs the real us not the one we curated to be accepted! Im done performing, I am enough and so are you! 🫶🏾

    • @girlygirl1890
      @girlygirl1890 6 месяцев назад

      @Myazanae You said "I'm done performing, I am enough" Wow. Powerful words that can benefit all.

  • @kaybelletv3659
    @kaybelletv3659 6 месяцев назад +4

    Thanks for speaking life into us. What you’re saying is so important & it resonates with me. I’m excited & scared at the same time. But I just gotta do it! No more wasting time by playing it small.

  • @amoraslucha
    @amoraslucha 6 месяцев назад +5

    your channel and everything you share and put out has been incredibly helpful and inspiring. thank you so so much for all you do and the thought you put into this - i can clearly tell it's you being you too which is even more beautiful. thank you!

  • @JSimoneSongs
    @JSimoneSongs 6 месяцев назад +5

    Shalom❤

  • @yvetteboonecreates
    @yvetteboonecreates 6 месяцев назад +3

    Dropping gems as always. I got some literal tea for this one, cause I know better. Love the message Sis...and congrats.

  • @gloriousmettle4014
    @gloriousmettle4014 6 месяцев назад +1

    You went straight to the heart of this. That prompt, to get to the root of why we fear being seen is such a good one for us to explore. Thank you so so much for being you🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

  • @DearYoungerSelf111
    @DearYoungerSelf111 2 месяца назад

    I love this video topic - we are talking effective life skills here and I am for it! For me, facing my shadow side, the things that I feel yuck about - like shame-guilt-dispappointment-judgement - I have to face the voice inside my mind - When we face it - it may or may not be as bad as we think - No one knows about the voice inside your mind but you (this is a good thing) - Perfectionism can a play a role in being afraid to be seen - What is failure? What is success? What is excellence? What is mediocrity? To me I am most afriad of being mediocore - God dont make mediocrity (have you looked at outerspace and nature here on Earth) - We are here to live and be and express and learn and expand - This is our freedom that we must grant each other and ourselves.

  • @tiara2crown
    @tiara2crown 6 месяцев назад +4

    My problem is I wanna be seen but lowkey catch an attitude when someone staring super hard 😬😂

    • @kjmcdaniels1812
      @kjmcdaniels1812 6 месяцев назад +1

      Everybody's acknowledgement isn't for you, especially if they're rudely staring! I catch a case when they are 👀 too 🤣

    • @fazziland3932
      @fazziland3932 2 месяца назад

      😂

  • @wildflower8028
    @wildflower8028 3 месяца назад

    Thank you so much for this video. I am afraid to be seen as well, but on the flip side, want to be seen in the same breath. My fears of rejection and not feeling as if I’m enough hold me back. I appreciate you for speaking life into us! Have a great day Alecia!

  • @Sunniyy
    @Sunniyy 6 месяцев назад +1

    Keep being you Alecia. The people need you. Since coming across your channel you always give me a different level of insight where I walk away refreshed, encouraged, and a little more gentle with myself.

  • @delenthiairby9156
    @delenthiairby9156 Месяц назад

    You are speaking truths I had trouble finding in myself. Now i know what to work on.Thank you!!!!❤

  • @reazyNcrackers
    @reazyNcrackers 5 дней назад

    What an intellectual video wow. Thank you so much. New subscriber. This video has my name all over it and it feels nice to know my feelings are valid. Being a dancer and writer at heart I’m struggling with this now and it’s hard to switch from off to on. But God basically says it’s rude to have these gifts and blessings and not pour back into the universe and to take up spaces and that’s so powerful. So now I feel guilty lol. I’ve done the work over the years now the numbness and narrative is old and uncomfortable so. Thank you for the mental break down 💐

  • @MightyIntellectual
    @MightyIntellectual 20 дней назад

    That part about being my own enslaver. Im sick and tied of being sick and tied! OKAY...

  • @daviscd6837
    @daviscd6837 2 месяца назад

    Thank you soon much for sharing this, your thoughts on your journey. I id with a lot of what you say and have been shown things about myself. I find it HARD to be a Black woman in this country. I feel less alone.

  • @Withlove_nijah
    @Withlove_nijah 2 месяца назад +1

    Omg this video is so on point. I relate to this so much right now. Thanks for making this video 🌱 😊

  • @Taylor_Made_
    @Taylor_Made_ 6 месяцев назад +2

    Thank you for this! It was definitely a message! ❤

  • @The.divinemuse
    @The.divinemuse 6 месяцев назад +1

    Alecia I really appreciate your words and content. Your videos are always right on time with what I’m usually thinking about. You put the thoughts I’m thinking into words.

  • @50PlusSelfcareJourney
    @50PlusSelfcareJourney 6 месяцев назад +1

    Yes. Say it and keep saying it. ❤

  • @janicedavis2902
    @janicedavis2902 6 месяцев назад +1

    I've been listening to these video talks for awhile. First time commenting. Had a very challenging day on these matters discussed. Right on time. Really appreciated this insight. Keep up the good work. So inspiring 😊❤

  • @theartistoracle
    @theartistoracle 2 месяца назад +1

    I loved this keep it going girl

  • @jessiemae147
    @jessiemae147 3 месяца назад

    I love all of your content Alecia. Thank you for facing your fear of being seen, it gives me the encouragement to do it too!

  • @emiliesan2184
    @emiliesan2184 2 месяца назад +1

    thank you sooooo much for sharing 🙏🌹

  • @ancestorsleaves
    @ancestorsleaves 6 месяцев назад

    This is such a relevant topic, living in a judgemental society. I know I just want peace, and although I struggle with this at times, ultimately I feel its best to just be myself and express what needs to get out. Keeping it inside and playing small eats you from the inside and effects your mental health.

  • @patriciajamison3816
    @patriciajamison3816 6 месяцев назад

    Girl you were preaching to me and did you not echo my life❤❤❤. Thank you for my transparency and release.🌹🌹🌹

  • @mazieelizabeth5138
    @mazieelizabeth5138 Месяц назад

    are you in my brain ??? beautiful video. just found your chanel 🦋

  • @thenotoriouscam1
    @thenotoriouscam1 2 месяца назад

    Thank you

  • @PianoManJ
    @PianoManJ Месяц назад

    I appreciate your videos a lot ❤

  • @Sammy200655294
    @Sammy200655294 6 месяцев назад

    this is just what I needed, like the answer I asked for! This feels like part of a BIG series of answers I finally got. Maybe because I chose to finally listen. And to want to change. Thank you so much for this, it means more than you might think! all the love to you, bless you ❤✨

  • @Tommie710
    @Tommie710 5 месяцев назад

    20:24 - 24:00 🫶🏾👏🏾👍🏾👌🏾i replayed this. Yes!

  • @beyondplutopodcast
    @beyondplutopodcast 6 месяцев назад

    your videos really ground me, thank you for your service Alecia you are such a light in my life 🤧

  • @kylewambot2664
    @kylewambot2664 6 месяцев назад

    23:10❤"tolerance"

  • @ProsperityWithAngela
    @ProsperityWithAngela 6 месяцев назад

    Every Word. Thank you.

  • @randomchik012
    @randomchik012 6 месяцев назад

    Thank you so much, I needed to hear this today 😊💕

  • @princessbagley
    @princessbagley 6 месяцев назад

    I see myself and you..❤

  • @empress2020
    @empress2020 6 месяцев назад

    ❤❤❤Thank you, I needed to hear this today..

  • @modalsoul6511
    @modalsoul6511 4 месяца назад +3

    Not sure if this matters but I’m a 49 ( going on 50) single male, no children , never had a girlfriend nor the prospect of one, I don’t like being seen either especially being 6ft6 which is aweful as far as I’m concerned.
    Now I can walk through a crowded mall as long as I’m wearing my scrubs (hospital work ) but if I was dressed up I start panicking and people seem to really stare at me when I’m dressed nice but when I’m in my scrubs I feel like I am normal and I can breathe.

    • @AlwayysBeKind
      @AlwayysBeKind 3 месяца назад +3

      Hey friend. I don’t know you, but I just wanted to encourage you. God give you that height for a reason. I know what it’s like, I’m a 5’9 woman and people make fun of my height and body size, but you on the other hand. It’s a blessing that you are tall. My dad is 6’5 and a half. Be proud of your height and I’m sure you draw in attention when you’re dressed up because you’re good looking. Embrace your height with confidence. It’s your super power. Have a Good Day. ☺️

    • @modalsoul6511
      @modalsoul6511 3 месяца назад +1

      @@AlwayysBeKind I appreciate that but it’s hard , and the fact that I’m not really that physically attractive just makes it even harder.

    • @AlwayysBeKind
      @AlwayysBeKind 3 месяца назад +3

      @@modalsoul6511 You want to know something. I was drawn to your comment, because I was like Wow! That sounds like me. I’m forty, single woman and no children. I’ve been in a couple of relationships, but single for a while now. I feel the exact same way as you. I feel like I’m hiding a lot of the time, but we have to be strong, brave and face our fears. Think about it. If those people stare at you…..So what. They don’t know you or nothing about you. Just grin, nod your head and keep pushing. I know it’s hard to do, but we can do this. Anytime you need encouragement, just come back to this comment and we’ll encourage each other. ☺️

    • @modalsoul6511
      @modalsoul6511 3 месяца назад +1

      @@AlwayysBeKindwill do my friend.

    • @AlwayysBeKind
      @AlwayysBeKind 3 месяца назад +1

      @@modalsoul6511 ☺️

  • @jhssmith2004
    @jhssmith2004 6 месяцев назад

    yes.

  • @RespectfulCicada
    @RespectfulCicada 6 месяцев назад

    Thanks for this 💓💓

  • @Xxbliss
    @Xxbliss 3 месяца назад

    This! Too deep

  • @JasenomadeTV
    @JasenomadeTV 6 месяцев назад

    Thank you❤

  • @tyronebunyon7254
    @tyronebunyon7254 6 месяцев назад

    VERY GOOD VIDEO.

  • @a_nonyemous
    @a_nonyemous 6 месяцев назад

    Yeah, I'm afraid to record videos in the house bc I don't want my family to hear me and judge what I'm saying😖

  • @delenthiairby9156
    @delenthiairby9156 Месяц назад

    ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

  • @ntaolenglebitsa5829
    @ntaolenglebitsa5829 5 месяцев назад

    I want to start a business but I am so scared

  • @YY-wu5yk
    @YY-wu5yk 6 месяцев назад

    ❤❤❤ 🙏🏾

  • @linaxx575
    @linaxx575 24 дня назад

    you are so sweet 🤍🤍

  • @Oscarnodwannabe
    @Oscarnodwannabe 6 месяцев назад

    ❤❤❤

  • @opinionsarelikeassholes1986
    @opinionsarelikeassholes1986 6 месяцев назад +1

    👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 Thank you, I really needed this message. Amazing!

  • @newdiffrentbetter
    @newdiffrentbetter 6 месяцев назад

    The fear of rejection is definitely there! But also it's the comfort of the known of not being seen (pity party/victim) and fear of what being seen will be/feel like ... fear of the unknown of being seen and what does or doesn't happen with that...and the rejection.
    😮‍💨🥴🫤

  • @teatime.beauty
    @teatime.beauty 6 месяцев назад

    Oh wow RIGHT ON TIME ❤❤❤

  • @danox2851
    @danox2851 6 месяцев назад

    ❤❤❤

  • @Char_the_bell
    @Char_the_bell 6 месяцев назад

    ❤❤❤