Man I hear you Rubz - I sometimes miss that naive part of myself that was destroyed through all of this. However I do like being more self aware and observant about what is *really* going on around me. I hear you about being able to "love that deeply again". I have hope that we can but to be honest the sting is still there. Even with Debby there are parts of me that I "close-hold" because of the betrayal from the ex. When someone takes 20 years of your dark secrets and uses them to destroy you for their own personal gain it is tough to *ever* open yourself up to that. I think we can love deeply again but it just won't be so naive and innocent as it was before...
Rubz, I *absolutely believe it is possible to get out of that!!!* I am an example of what you are talking about. I didnt' lose my "job" but I did finally lose my leadership position. I'm still in massive amount of debt (although now a lot of it is because of the channel). I felt my life was destroyed (retirement gone, pension gone, ability to save {still} gone). I also went through a phase that I couldn't meet anyone and dating was nonexistent. Just remember YOU ARE NOT a waste of oxygen. Dude you owe it to yourself to work on YOU and get your life back. It is a tough journey - it is NOT easy - but it is doable and the outcome on the other side is life transformational. Rubz, there were times I wasn't sure I'd made it another day. The possibility of hope was lost. But look at me now, I can't even believe the life I have today. Rubz, with how you're struggling I'd encourage you to get a good therapist, maybe one that is skilled in EMDR and couple that with those hypnosis files I mentioned - you can find them at www.dadsurvivingdivorce.com/hypnosis - man you owe it to yourself to try EVERYTHING (positive) that you can to get your life back. These parasites steal our joy, peace, self esteem - but *they don't get to keep it forever*.
@Lord Rubz - Red Pill Rampage Hang on in there!!....I does take time but I promise you ...You will recover!...Complex PTSD..."From Surviving to Thriving"...Pete Walker...Is an excellent book....I think you can read it from Utube....Good Luck!
Sometimes I think being "in the dark" is helpful Andrew. Honestly I'm grateful that I haven't had the various guys shoved in my face over the last 7 years. Technically I haven't met any of them... Well I might have met one when I picked my daughter up for prom a couple of weekends ago. A "cop" friend was there so see my daughter off. Technically the guy is married and has kids of his own so I don't know if they ever "dated" - but it was odd to finally meet someone the kids have mentioned on and off for the last four years. But yeah, I'm find with the dark!
It's not moving on when they never face & confront the issues that caused the previous relationship to break up. They just carry more problems into the next relationship.
@@DSD IT'S an illusion that does not last either. Someone somewhere eventually catches on to their fairytale. By that time they have already destroyed a previous relationship and countless family only to wake up to more destruction upon their new relationship. It's a personal whirlpool of hell they create for themselves too.
That is so very true. I know it is sad for the current and future victims but it does show that they are just trapped in this nasty cycle of their own making. These others can hopefully heal but they can not...
A very important point to remind yourself is that the “connection” you have with your ex is NOT love!! Love can not exist in the presence of abuse. It’s a trauma bond. That’s it! If it is really bothering you because your abusive ex is with someone else it’s time to take a look in the mirror and work on yourself. Counseling helped me a lot.
Narcissists need supply, they will always move on (sometimes before the discard), and when you wake up, you realize just how fortunate you are. Sadly if you are in my place, you also understand just how dangerous this becomes for your kids.
I hear you Lords - it is a "fortunate" turn of events to be away from them - but there always is collateral damage and often time that is our children...
Yes our sweet innocent kids. It's hard to see them suffer. They will see the truth. Try to remember to give them a safe place to land when they are with you ♡
General video topic idea. “Getting Robbed”. That is the best way I can describe coming out from one of these toxic relationships. The feeling of being robbed. Robbed of time, robbed of finances, robbed of your home, robbed of your kids. The list of robberies goes on and on. How to deal with these emotions and realities of being robbed. I think being robbed is a great analogy and perhaps the strategies to move on from this robbery will help many people.
Hmm - that's a good idea for a video Matthew - on top of being robbed we were also violated in a profound way. Unfortunately - most of the time - we also get forced to "support" the "robber" with threat of jail time... Thanks for the suggestion!
They are so good with the threats and use of fear as intimidation - honestly it is NOT worth the risk of confronting them because of the aftermath they can cause.
Wow, the timing of your video is spot on. My ex-husband messaged me a few days ago and told me he was going to introduce our daughter to his significant other (notification was done per our parenting plan). It’s been a few years already since separation/divorce and I thought I was completely healed but it literally made me have a PTSD moment where I felt the panic and anxiety I used to feel when we were together. Luckily I realized what was going on and just breathed through it and it passed. Crazy how they can still trigger you years later. Thanks for the video!
Hi Reda welcome to the channel! Isn't it amazing how that crap can come rolling back. I'm wondering how I'll ultimately respond when she announces her new SO or brings them to an event. I'm glad you were able to catch yourself and get back on track. I suppose it's good that he informed you instead of just hearing about it from the kids.
We would all be so so extremely very lost without your counsel. Thank you for giving all of us a compass to navigate this from North, South, East to West, that’s how massive this topic truly is.
Oh thank you so very much for those kind words Giacomo I really appreciate it! I'm trying to do my part to give back and help as those handle of people did for me when I was in my darkest days.
5 yrs . without her put downs, she knows shes damaged ,new supply got her pregnant, i have 2 children who i miss, but i am getting things done in peace, without her constant bi polar narssisistic personality. im here for my kids , if they ever want stability, i live alone and theres no way im living with a woman again,
Duane I can't thank you enough.... You have the specialist skills to be a counselor of narcissistic abuse and you have helped me and countless others.... THANK YOU AGAIN!
Thank you for saying that Simon! In all honesty though it is because I can share my story and that makes me more relatable. A therapist is bound by ethics and their licenses requirements to NOT do what I'm doing. So I think I fit a specialize niche that can really help people. My hope is that some folks will have good therapists that can leverage off what I'm doing to have those conversations to help their clients - I've heard that some have - which is wonderful to hear. I really do appreciate your support Simon! Share this if you know anyone else who needs to hear this message maybe we can save another lost soul!
Thank you again Duane for your understanding. The few people I've spoken to about the narcissistic abuse you, I and others have suffered have never even heard of such a thing and are simply unable to help. You DO fill a niche service in this respect and once I'm able to financially I'll send you something on Patreon or similar as a thank you. I'm going through property settlement at the moment and after a 12 year relationship my ex narc has hired an expensive lawyer and wishes to give me ZERO of our family home, contents and of course custody. Sound familiar LOL. I have a long memory and will not forget you and all you've done to help me! Stay safe and Narc Free brother...
Isn't it amazing how they have to guilt, remorse, ethics when it comes to this. They want *EVERYTHING* they can grab on to and will force the issue. It is amazing how a person can be so greedy, self absorbed and guilt or sense of fairness or fair play. It is so tough for people to understand who haven't been through it. Honestly even some who have been through are so jaded by it that their advice is "suck it up, I did". Simon I'm just grateful that I have a skill set and voice that I can give to this that is HELPFUL for others. When i was looking for divorce survival all I found were men/fathers filled with so much hate and bitterness (rightful so) but I knew it was unhelpful and doesn't do anything to help someone get their lives and joy back. So I'm not sure how long I'll be able to do this but I will definitely continue for as long as I can!
You could commercialize your experiences Duane and offer one on one counseling sessions to victims online. The 'Little Shaman Healing' does this successfully concerning Narc Abuse victims (taken off RUclips for God knows what reason, but can be found on FaceBook) with counselling sessions and as a way to successfully commercialize this try taking a look at 'Entrepreneurs in Cars' (RUclips) as a template for a successful second income stream. Just an idea.... Stay safe!
Good idea Simon! I have been considering doing coaching/mentoring (not counseling) but its just a time problem. The day-job gets in the way of a lot of that. I'm spread pretty thin as it is now so I'm not comfortable with including that right now. Although I have been considering opening up some limited time slots - I just haven't pressed the button on it yet. I do like what Entrepreneurs in Cars has done and damn he sure has grown - I found him around 30k subs. I don't know what the deal with Little Shaman and RUclips - that was really odd - did they kick her back off when she created another channel?
That's the key Bianchi - it really comes down to that simple truth. The difficult part is that the kids aren't really going to come out and tell you that - BUT - if you watch closely you'll see it!
I wrote a list of all the toxic qualities she brought into my life, all the ways she hurt me over and over even after I healthily/maturely expressed my boundaries, and what I realized is I’m so focused on “why wasn’t I good enough? Why didn’t she choose me?” And the real question is “why do I want someone that isn’t good for me? That can’t make me happy and isn’t healthy for me?” Getting over this person is about raising YOUR self worth, asking if people can bring you consistently healthy dynamics that meet your emotional, mental and physical needs. It doesn’t matter if they have moved on because your happiness and worth isn’t tied to them even if you’re still convinced of that lie. For now, enjoy being single, enjoy developing yourself and acknowledging the core wounds that brought you into this dynamic in the first place. They hurt you likely because they have no ownership of their healing, so do the opposite and own up to yours, that’s self love.
Oh my goodness! Life is so peaceful when my ex is seeing someone! I can always tell when they broke up because I get random motions in the mail. I feel bad for his current girlfriend but I’m also hoping for a marriage!
I needed to hear it again! Really thank you! Two weeks after separation he found a new woman and met her with family and relatives. He rejected me and our daughter. He told everyone that is so happy and totally changed. Told stopped drinking, gamebaling, smoking etc. I was broken. Asking myself if I'm the reason, it's my fault maybe.I'm struggling with this blame till now.Felt not good enough for him. After 17 years I ment nothing, rubbish. After 6 months his new big love threw him out for a while and after that I blocked him and his family, I didn't need this crazyness anymore.It was one year and half ago but there is still pain and horrible moments for me. It's one year no contact I don't want to know what's happening with him. He just disappeared and my choice was to do the same, I had to save my mind. Two months ago he was walking around my flat and asked my neighbers for me but they lied him I don't live here. I feel sorry for him and angry to him at the same time although I know nothing for him. It's enough for me but so hard. You give me a strengh! Thank you so much!
Radina is it so tough and it is really difficult to get them out of our minds. I remember going through that where I just couldn't get away from the pain. That is where the absolute thinking and blackhole thinking were born from. But ultimately I think it was the hypnosis that *really* helped to break that hold. Heck there are still even times where I will catch myself wondering "why" and "what if" but at least now I can stop that thinking and get myself back on track. It really does just take time to heal from all of this - hopefully you are working through that pain though so that it just isn't buried. I made the mistake (because I didn't know better) of just burying those emotions and pain and then a year later they came back and it was really difficult to get through. So you will heal from this - it sounds like you are doing pretty good (in the overall healing process) and are on track!
OMG it really is Demetria - it is so difficult to spend ANY time with a narc and then have them "flip that switch". I was working with a person earlier today who is seriously struggling with a short term 8-month relationship - and their pain is so similar to what we've all experienced. They really do burrow into our minds and it is such a journey to get them OUT.
@@demigaines5644 I know you probably want understand this now but the reality is this person did you a favor. They are where they need to be and who they need to be with. Once you get over this person and move on without caring or thinking about what this person is doing, that's when everything changes they will try to come back in your life believe me but please be strong and don't allow them to.
Still coming to terms with it. 10 year relationship, divorced, immediately attempted to reconcile for 6 months afterwards, positive signs the whole time, only for her to abruptly cut me off and move on. Afterwards, instant and complete 180 towards me, cold, not willing to entertain any conversation about us and the past, instant 0 contact. Certain she’s moved on, and wont say anything about it. The change was night and day from one day to the next. Painful to feel that the person you knew is no more, yet they’re still alive. Its that weird cognitive dissonance that tortures me daily.
I'll need this video on a loop constantly for possibly the next few weeks to get me through a rough patch I've been going into with my own thoughts. Exactly what I needed to hear about this subject. Thanks again Duane! Keep fighting the good fight!
My ex is actively on dating apps etc, our son talks openly about it after his visits. A tiny part of me hurts but I have to remind myself who this person really is, 95% of me is relieved he’s finally moving on and focusing on someone else though I feel bad for whoever takes on this nightmare, the most of me hopes the new person is kind to our son and not crazy. Thanks for the heads up on the stability. Thanks for the honesty part on the end. It’s a tough thing to go through.
Oh I hear you on that one Baneful Things - I'm actually a bit relieved that she hasn't been "openly" dating except for the last couple of years. I'm not thrilled about her current boyfriend - seems to be a bit of a loser - but I'm glad the kids have been spared a laundry list of people come through the doors. But whomever it might one-day-be I just hope they are good to the kids...
WOW.. WOW!! Just yesterday i was watching the Easter church service on line where my son and his wife attend. My ex is not a member there but she was there yesterday morning. I saw her for the first time with her new Bo. Nothing like the type of man she would get with. Had that biker look, bald, heavy set with tatted arms. Nothing against this guy but it not they type of person she is attracted to. Its a very small church and they were sitting right in front of the camera. Seeing this man holding my newborn grandson and kissing him on his head just killed me Watching the two of them interact like our 28 year marriage was nothing kills me. Your videos open my eyes to more and more new things that i never saw before because i was not looking at it from the outside in. Now I am. I guess i needed to see this to help me move on. Thanks again :)
Hi Eddie, man that had to be rough to watch especially if you didn't expect it. Most of the time we can prepare - or avoid - situations like that. One thing to remember they don't really have a "type" they have supply. I think we get ourselves into trouble when we equate the way they "acted" with us as their true personality. They are chameleon and adjust to fit whomever they are with. It's really hard to watch that as well because it just messes with our brains. I suppose you're right - in some ways it may be helpful to have seen that - hopefully it doesn't linger with you for a while. The first time I had something like that - but not quite in your face as your experience - it effected me for a weeks... Hang in there Eddie!
@@DSD Yea i was hung up on the type of person My Ex Narc was involved in too,she was the complete opposite of me,,until i realised that he has no filters ,,,he did not care what her morals or boundaries were,,,she is just a supply of attention to him,,i don't feel sorry for the GF she interfered with my marriage and he walked away from it,,,she knew that he was married and had a very ill wife and a son ( small town) ,, Wow she now has a boogie prize LOL !!! and I got my life back !!! when i see them together which is very rarely ,,I still get a bit annoyed ,,cause they are so fake ! both of them,, He finally got what he wanted which is a hollow life !!! Thank you Duane for your great videos ,,you help us all realise ,,we can get thru this and hopefully Learn,Love,and laugh about it in the end !!!!
Cathy you hit on a really important fact - they ARE fake and it IS difficult to see that. That REALLY used to bother me before because it just stung to see the lie in front of my face. With time we all learn that they can have their fake life and we'll just sit over here and get our GENUINE lives BACK!!!
The worst of all this is the effect it has on the children. Nothing worse than your children innocently telling you that Dad has a new friend that is a girl and finding a picture of them together. This info didn't come as a shock to me, it just makes me shake my head. Not sure if there is a respectful way to introduce your ex's new partner, especially when they are both going through a divorce.
Eddie A. We are all unfortunately going through this disgusting CRAP! I still I'am shocked on how fast they can move on... It is so unnatural. It is just Evil really..
Perfectly timed. I've known about the new supply since just after she discarded me, but haven't let her know I know. I've been able to process all of it over time. She just informed me that she introduced the kids to him while on a cruise, and also mentioned he's moving away so the kids won't see him much. Seems like a good reason to not introduce him, but I guess I'm too logical. She also says she can help our daughter with her anger issues and we can stop taking her to therapy. Seems like more family changes (chaos) in her life is a good reason to stay in therapy to me. But what do I know, right? (sarcasm)
Wow - I was really expecting that story to go differently like - she introduced him and was either getting married OR moving in. Oh F'THAT on her "helping" seriously? I don't remember Spider, do you have any say on the therapy or is it entirely up to her?
@@DSD We're still in the process of the divorce and I've been the one pushing for kids therapy (even though we agreed in writing already) and using logic, guilt, shame, and a bit of playing dumb to encourage it. We're planning to move all of us across the country after the divorce to get the kids into a specific school district where we moved from about two years ago. I wish the divorce was final ASAP, but she keeps dragging her feet and blaming me for all the expenses/annoyance of the divorce. She doesn't like to be held accountable, surprise surprise.
Thanks Duane. I don't want him back, only care about my child. She's been in therapy for 5 years due to her dad's BS, abuse, and lies. Nobody remembers why. I was smeared before it started. The ex has had GFs longer than we'd been separated. My daughter told me that her, the roommate, and gramna have been praying they separate. She's either also a narc or will be destroyed as I was. They changed churches, supposed Christians, which we've always been. I took her to church on Easter stressed I'd run into them. You know my history. I think they missed the 10 commandments...Adultery, etc...lol. She's not always kind to my daughter, sometimes outright cruel...sad. Hope you had a nice Easter my friend ♡
Thank you for all you do. You give me & others clarity & hope navigating ourselves out of these traumatic narcissistic relationships. No one else understands, unless they've been through it. You understand, you are a godsend 🙏💖
Thank you so much for your support Patsy I really appreciate it! It is so difficult for us and for others who support us that just don't understand, as you said, unless they've been through it. I'm just grateful I can make something positive out of all of this!
I had a very jealous fiancé and I spent a long time praying for him to find another woman, otherwise he wouldn't let me go. It worked, thanks God! You can see in the news the amount of women daily killed by their jealous men.
Alot of women play and string men along long after the breakup because thats how 90 percent of women are options and backup plans its just female nature i knew a guy who was seperated with his wife however they was still seeing each other and hooking up well one day the guy decides to go on lunch break to see his wife little did he know another man was there husband flipped out and banged on the door the new guy had a gun on him and shot the husband dead at the door stories like that and knowing female nature is why i dont even try anymore you can either keep burning your hand on the stove until it burns you and the whole house down or you can accept reality and stop touching the hot stove
My ex fiancee whom I proposed to in April broke up with me 1.5 months after accepting my proposal. I became super cold and mean. I was acting needy and etc for weeks until giving to the break up. We were together for 2 years and we had toxic moments but I was very good to her. Our biggest issue was me suspecting her infidelity. She denied all the accusations. I was in NC for 11 days when I had a strange feeling to drive past her apartment. Mind you I wasn't doing that before at all. I rode by and I saw her and some guy walking out her apt and he was taking out the garbage. Like wtf , I was the one doing that. She really moved on fast. This was the closure I needed although it tore my guts out. I had to text her and tell her what I saw and how grateful I was to see it after being gas lighted for so long. That b*tch really had this dude over there playing house after we were engaged. The old me would have acted a fool but I took it on the chin and left.
The one who discarded me after 10 years just couldn’t admit it was because I was no longer useful and that there was, of course, a new supply. Anyway, that was the dealbreaker, the denial is in itself a pathological lie. They know when you know as well but it’s still difficult to let them go mentally. I’ve watch many of your videos on this Duane and highly recommend them as they’ve helped me tremendously. Thank you. X x
I'm glad they've helped A - I think the reason they do is because I've been there... I've struggled to let her go, just like you talked about and most people go through. This is such a difficult experience and I think being able to really relate to someone REALLY HELPS. Anyway I'm grateful to be able to offer something that can help and to have been able to turn this difficult situation into something positive that is transforming lives - okay maybe I'm being a bit over the top - but that is my goal at least!
After a 15yr relationship 3 kids and a home together .she pushed me out a yr ago and now says she been in seeing someone since Oct. 3 months .. a lie she blending the new fam .around my kids constantly and in my home . In order to get joint custody I had to agree to volunteer a order for 6 months so she can move in peace still keeping it all a secret . I had to put pieces together. Can't loose my cool in order not to break order and loose joint custody .. evil vendective woman
There are ‘no free lunches’, meaning: (life will catch up) - if they are frolicking around projecting ‘wonderful’. Seriously, that’s nice (unphased). You know how they work and what it all means. Most do not! It is much easier (for survivors) to take this indifferent mindset, re: them moving on with another, once out and healed - it will happen (not over-night, but it will happen!)
Spot on Carol and I can tell you from my personal experience when I didn't know what I was dealing with - and wasn't yet a "survivor" it was tearing me up inside. Once you see through the facade and understand what is driving them it is MUCH easier. Sure there are times where I am sad about how this has all played out BUT I am so grateful to be away from that environment. I really believe it would have killed me had I not escaped...
DSD you are so truthful Duane - that’s why people benefit! In the beginning it is gut wrenching pain (b/c you’ve given your heart & soul, and endured). I am so glad you are out - such an inspiration for those who are not quite there yet. The most difficult time is in the beginning yes! Emotions are fresh. I know I would have died or lived in poverty had I not acted when I did - sounds dramatic to some, but a tragic certainty. Those who have lived to tell (or share) know. Again, so glad you are out - I believe every word!!!
You hit on another important point - when we *try* to explain this to others they think we are over dramatic and embellishing our stories and situations. That ultimately makes things worse. But yes, anyone who has *really* been through this can absolutely understand and relate. We are all so much stronger than we ever thought - some aren't or they just fall through the cracks and are lost. My/our goal is to catch those before them become lost!
Great video!!! It’s like you were talking about me. My ex was dating a new guy within a few months of ending a 20 year marriage. She would make a big deal about how great her new guy was. How he is all the things I’m not. It hurt bad but in the end it was the best thing. My divorce process although not smooth went ok. I ended up with 60/40 custody. My kids were told they would have to just deal with her “new”life. Although I feel badly for what my kids were dealing with I was the stable parent and have gotten much closer with them. She was to busy with her new guy to put up a big fight. She was more interested in discarding me and her “old” life. I think new supply can work to your advantage as long as you are getting proper help to keep your head.
I hear you on that CWB and although painful it can really help. I'm assuming you mean you have the 60% time? That is *outstanding* if that's what you meant. I know its hard on everyone but at least the kids know who is stable and loving and who has lost their mind.
DSD yes I get 60%. I work a job that works a 24 hour shift. Her new guy has a more traditional 50/50 custody of his child. She wanted to mimic his but that would means a few of my days I wouldn’t be home at all. I argued the fairness of this and wanted a schedule that took into account my work schedule. In the end I was granted every Thursday to make up for the lost time and she could take them if she wanted on my work days. (I’m still amazed that a court approved this) It’s been almost 2 years and I think she has taken the kids twice on days I was at work. So I get 8 days and she gets 6 days. I really feel bad for my kids. They are older and can manage being on there own but it’s not ideal. I like you struggled with the reality of everything. I just couldn’t believe the stuff she was doing. I honestly thought I was losing my mind. Thank god I had a good therapist. Somehow I held it all together.
Yeah it's tough but honestly the kids probably enjoy the chaos free time at your place even if you are at work. I think for the most part if both parties agree the judge will just hack off on it. The only time they generally question is if one person is really giving away the farm so to speak but a schedule is just a schedule. Man I hear you about losing your mind - I really thought I was going crazy and yeah it just wasn't a fun time...
My ex wife is seeing someone new. This is like her 6th relationship. The boys seem to like him. I only remain neutral and polite and wish them the best. I know when my ex is trying to make me jealous but i remain cool about it. I am also happily remarried so it doesn''t matter to me.
I am struggling with this issue everyday (over three months now). In my heart, I wish she would just get the help she needs and work on herself. Instead, she is seeing someone new to manipulate. I should be happy it's not me.
Folks, don’t feel bad that your disordered ex has moved on. My disordered ex found a young girlfriend and I got my get-out-of-jail card. Unfortunately for me, my ex got dumped by his young girlfriend, and my ex started to hoover me and stalk me. It was scary as hell. So now I pray to God that my disordered ex finds a new supply soon.
Ugh well the hoovering and stalking part don't sound good but having them focus on their new "young" supply is nice. I hope its not too bad - are you worried about it?
DSD I’m not as worried now as I was 3 months ago. One wintry night when a storm door was swinging in the Chicago wind, I was so afraid that my disordered ex was outside my home that I called the cops. Fortunately the officers found an unlatched storm door. So that was the level of fear that I had at one point. I still feel vulnerable and exposed. I don’t feel safe anymore. I mourn the loss of freedom from fear.
I really liked your video buddy. Good empathy and way of relating and taking your time relating. That’s really important to people because a lot of other coaches just rush past the part where we re grieving and what we are going through.
Pain is odd, I think about how I feel a lot, I’ve grown since we broke up, but I’m still attached and heart broken and it’s been 6 months, I truly care about what is best for them but I struggle with anger
I know how u feel trust me. Its been a year and I’m totally over the breakup and everything but the thoughts of betrayal and not being good enough creep back in and haunts me and i get angry that someone actually did that to me…but i snap out of it easily.
@@mrclapz1488 mines a little different. It's been 2 years since I've talked to her. But because we worked together.. we broke up like 3 years ago but it is also the betrayal and trust that's gets me because she never told why she treated me the way she did when I asked her.. but I still have her on Facebook and she recently put a picture of her new guy.
OMG she was WELCOME to him. I feel sorry for her. When you see them for what they really are, you won't miss them. You'll get down on your knees and thank the lord that they are gone.
Good advice, I have struggled because he left by text after 20 yrs without even saying he was unhappy. He then hooked up with a work colleague while I was looking after sick kids/parents. I was attached but obviously he wasn’t. Therapy is hard to get in the UK.
My ex. met someone a month ago. They are already talking about getting married. We have two sons. The younger one primarily lives with his Dad. We share him. He will not tell us her name. He is so delusional. Good thing I talk with a Social Worker, and have my faith in Jesus.
After my second ex started seeing someone new over and over again while at the same time he was making sure to introduce her to me again right away the pain I felt at first while he was constant ordering me to stay away from our children was my worry about them. Like when my youngest was crying non-stop in his crib all day long for the first few weeks at his dad's house except when his dad was gone when people babysitting him were letting me talk to him on the telephone. That youngest child of mine who is a son does not remember that ordeal too anymore and that is normal. When his dad was not introducing me to his latest common law lover or his latest dalliance with a married woman being made in charge of his and his close in age sister's care instead of me his biological mother people would tell me what they found out went on with that which I didn't care to know too. Those 2 children of ours and another one born to his 3rd wife who left him next suffered a lot due to his neglect and his emotional abuse too. I cannot undo the past for my children. All I can do now is to make up my mind to feel grateful in advance if he manages to leave a large inheritance behind for them. Without wondering who is going ot outlive whom.
Ugh I filed divorce and it's in-house seperation....its tearing me up. Now I'm stuck in the house indefinitely because of the virus. It kills me...I honestly don't know if I will make it. This is beyond devastating. His chronic partying is curtailed (hookers, booze and concerts...$1500-$2,000 a month on his lifestyle.), temporarily...it was beyond triggering. I feel like I'm being punished (in his mind I am)....I cant live like this much longer. He lies, cheats and steals. It's a lonely existence, where I'm forced into the role of mother....hello, madonna-whore. I believe he found my "replacement"...so I get to witness this front and center. Since I filed, hes doubling down on the abuse, while being dismissive. I enjoy your videos. More men need to come foward about abuse. You seem genuine...the others are narcs trying to cash-in...
I lost all feelings for my ex when I found her who she really was and the things she did, but I do struggle when she's seemingly so happy taking our kid (we have shared custody) with the man she cheated on me with and later she cheated on him with me (long story). I know I can't really do anything but accept the situation, I just hope my ex doesn't create drama that affects our kid.
Sorry man. Hoping is good, but planning might be better. I've just lowered my expectations and take the craziness as it comes. If I find myself emotionally invested in her craziness, I recognize it's time to lower my expectations further.
@@spider3772 Thank you for your words, yeah my lawyer contacted the mother of my kid and basically informed her about the legal consequences if she tries to force our kid to do anything she (5 year old) doesn't want, lying to me about her / lying to her about me and other behavior that could impact her emotional stability and development. My ex turned out to be a malignant sociopath and NPD, a pathological liar capable of juggling several "personas" (realities) and relationships at the same time, crazy stuff.
That's good David - I wish I could have arrived at that point but it took me *years* to get to that point. Its going to be tough for your kids, just make sure you keep your "house" stable and loving for them and minimize the drama and chaos. That is a huge help and as long as the kids have one stable house/parent it can save them from this nightmare...
@@DSD Thanks a lot from Spain where I watch all your videos and read every comment. I developed the best version of myself in every way I could just to be there for my kid at all times, it was a blessing that figuring out the narcissist opened my eyes that I needed a change and that change was for the best. However, I do not like at all that the narcissist is taking my kid with this man because with the things that happened still lingering (she cheated on him with me after she discarded me and this man knows about it, but for whatever reason he's always forgiving her) I fear the drama and chaos that no doubt she will create at some point, my kid is my whole life and I can only accept that some things I cannot control, time will tell.
Spain!!! I love Spain and lived there from 1990 until 1993. I was near Morón de la Frontera and Sevilla! I can't speak Spanish any more (and I wasn't that great while I was there) but the people were WONDERFUL, the countrysides were beautiful, and I LOVED the food and tapas. I was fortunate to be in a small place with a minimum amount of Americans so the locals were VERY hospitable... I have to admit it was annoying when we'd go to "tourist spots" like Torremolinos the Americans there could be pretty obnoxious. Keep in mind David that narcissistic personalties have a unique ability to create a strong bond (typically a trauma bond) with their targets so it is not uncommon for them to be able to ensnare a previous ex. If they weren't able to heal and come to terms with who they are then yes this can happen. It is so difficult to not be able to stop this from happening to your children but again the best you can do is be there for them and make sure you are stable and loving for them. I know that doesn't "fix" the immediate problem but you have to pivot your focus or you'll drive yourself crazy.
Good I'm glad there seeing someone else let them be a anther person headache. The truth is I never want my ex in my life and now I'm still healing when it boils down to it. That really show me that she never was supposed to be part of my life.
I'm glad it is helpful! Hang in there Michael! It takes time to heal from this and unfortunately there is no way to rush it - no matter how much we'd like too...
Never saw any pic of my ex-fiancee with the other guy, however I saw her relationship status. I'm trying my best to not check her profile, sometimes it's hard, I know, but it's not gonna bring any benefit to us.
Well typically they have new supply lined up before they ever leave (or get caught)... I imagine he's with that person now unless if he's moved on from that one as well...
DSD he's still there and shes everything is wonderful shes a criminal like him better her than me. the bmw is totalled he put insurance on the bmw longer enough to total it.
We dated for 1.5 years. We broke up in late June come to find out in July she hooked up with others.. such a blow. Idk what to do anymore I’m so low right now.
when i left my ex our relationship was really unhealthy there was no scene in keeping my head down and if i moved my head up or if she feels that my eyes looked at an object then there was something for her to fright with me on who i was looking at so when i packed up my stuff and left i didn't care about if she found a new victim all i know if she found someone new it wont last for long her longest relationship after me was only one year and the next one didn't even last 6 months but when i found someone new she started to refuse my daughter to me cause my new girlfriend was way more attractive then her
I hear you on that Tim - sometimes just getting the heck away is a huge victory in itself! I hope with her new supplies, even if short lived, she keeps her focus OFF of you!
Our wedding was supposed to be at the 15th of January, cancelled two weeks before. Then he got married at 12 of February. Like if he got her out of the wardrobe!! She was there when i was blind.. How could this happen
@@critabeneta4598 thank u so much ❤ I'm so heartbroken and I don't know.what to do or weather if i can take him back (If he returns) or not.. The person i loved is dead and replaced with an evil. I still love the old one.
You are not alone friend for 5 years now it s going on and she know hiw to open my wound back. She go as far as texting me how she is happy how since she find the love of her life....o stable human being would never say that to their ex if they had the most basic empathy. Well Duane help me over and over...years after years..cuz it s all the same thing with the new supply...they cgange every 3 month and no it will never work with any of them ...most of the time we are empath peoples who got caught in their net of lie for too long..but do t worry friend you are at the right place for help Duane is an amazing guy. Hold on tight we are with you brother xxx
Thank you for sharing that Wolf and I hope the new folks read your comments but that truth can really help set you free. It still isn't easy BUT it isn't forever! Wolf I really appreciate your support and I'm grateful that I've been of help to you!
Tomorrow, I m going to change my telephone number. I called the Police because of this person. I m going to change my bank account etc. etc. I m tired.
absolute illusion, she wanted to "marry" me, i was her "soulmate", she would be with me "forever" she wants a "baby" with me... after a 4 year relationship, 2 weeks after NC she puts a new profile pic with new dude and blocks me lol
yeah tbh. I’m with you on that bro. With my ex for 4 years. Told me all the same things. Now she’s with some guy 20 years older. My heart is smashed. My soul is dead. I pray every night not to wake up the following day. I still loved her and I hate myself for it.
@@liliad.7448 honestly am still not over her and have had nobody since her. i'm in much better physical condition now though, but still depressed about how she threw our 5 years in the trash.
@@yeahtbh.161 That's awsome am so happy for you ...be stronger 💪 smarter, better that's what I am focusing on too it been a month and 2 weeks and I already lost so much weight due to my workouts ...when I read your comment I realized how am not the only one that goes through this type of hell but am trying to remain positive every single day is my first heartbreak and its the hardest thing I have ever endured ..so thanks for posting your story
Me and this girl were on and off "talking" for 3 months, we were always on and off because she didnt want to be in a relationshio yet because she was still trying to get over her ex. After 3 months of me trying to date her, i gave up and quit talking to her for 3 weeks, now shes talking to somebody else. Wth
That's exactly what's happening now. I don't know if she's talking to someone else but it just feels wrong. I don't know if you feel used, I get that feeling a lot.
Would you like to make your ex lover enter into a state of panic and confusion that will have her crazily thinking about being with you, without having to use "dirty techniques" or "cunning lies"? I'd personally 𝗀𝗈𝗈𝗀𝗅 Treitan Mellory's approach. You can certainly take it as far as you desire, so long as you wish.
I just cannot understand one thing about my ex-wife👭💔: she left me after she stole a large amount of our savings💲. BUT why she left if i was offering her money even after this had happen? She left and sometimes was stalking me but in a way that not persistent. And she could be getting more financial resources from me all this time. Why she chose to not go on with using me? The only explanation i can find that she is sick in her head. I cannot come up with any other explanation. Usually narc leaves a victim ONLY if victim has no resources left. This is not a case here🤔
i know a great powerful man that can help you get back your ex or crush forever without stress and delay, He also helped me too immediately. he have solution to all kind of problems.
Like after 6th period he got out first from his class so I was behind him and he looked behind me outside and he stopped and gave me a handshake and we walked together and we talked and I was like so happy until he told me :(
What if she introduces the kids before I've met him? We verbally agreed we would meet that person before we introduced them to kids? It sux Also agreed, in 1.5 yrs this is her 3rd boyfriend...but I guess it's more serious now that she put it out on Facebook and Instagram!
My ex narc was married when I was caught up in his game then he used his wife n her close friend as his flying monkeys n got me out of the picture. Now he's putting pics of his wife's friend.. He's seeing her now I guess n she's his wife's best friend. What's going on? Someone please help me understand this
Hi Julia - well the problem with people like this is that they live and thrive in chaos. They also have ZERO boundaries and NOTHING is off limits. So sleeping with his wife's best friend is fine for someone like that. This is why they leave a path of destruction and heartache in their wake.
My ex dumped me.. N 3 days later went with someone new.. N now not even 6 months later I came to know tht they already live together 👀👀👀🤯 n she look ladikos n not even close to his ex wife or me... Old, blond, ladikos
Any tips for making sure my daughter (5years old) keeps loving me despite the hate campaign by the ex wife and ex mother in law? I live in a different country since divorcing but would very very much have her visit me once she is old enough to travel
Is the second week of cooperating,We’re meeting at the police department to pick up and drop off the kids,I think I got it easy she filed for divorce she’s paying for the attorney and she moved out and got an apartment.
Can you do a vlog how to handle. With his new girlfriend that is more go attractive than me. I feel insecure. Bcoz she is pretty. Sexy and rich and have a nice work. Don’t know how to handle. Feeling insecure
That is VERY true kookiecanuck - I was just commenting to another how they leave a path of destruction and pain in their wake - it is just unfortunately their "nature" to not nurture!
Have you struggled when the ex has "moved on" and is in a new relationship? How did you deal with it or are you still struggling with this?
Man I hear you Rubz - I sometimes miss that naive part of myself that was destroyed through all of this. However I do like being more self aware and observant about what is *really* going on around me. I hear you about being able to "love that deeply again". I have hope that we can but to be honest the sting is still there. Even with Debby there are parts of me that I "close-hold" because of the betrayal from the ex. When someone takes 20 years of your dark secrets and uses them to destroy you for their own personal gain it is tough to *ever* open yourself up to that. I think we can love deeply again but it just won't be so naive and innocent as it was before...
Rubz, I *absolutely believe it is possible to get out of that!!!* I am an example of what you are talking about. I didnt' lose my "job" but I did finally lose my leadership position. I'm still in massive amount of debt (although now a lot of it is because of the channel). I felt my life was destroyed (retirement gone, pension gone, ability to save {still} gone). I also went through a phase that I couldn't meet anyone and dating was nonexistent. Just remember YOU ARE NOT a waste of oxygen. Dude you owe it to yourself to work on YOU and get your life back. It is a tough journey - it is NOT easy - but it is doable and the outcome on the other side is life transformational. Rubz, there were times I wasn't sure I'd made it another day. The possibility of hope was lost. But look at me now, I can't even believe the life I have today. Rubz, with how you're struggling I'd encourage you to get a good therapist, maybe one that is skilled in EMDR and couple that with those hypnosis files I mentioned - you can find them at www.dadsurvivingdivorce.com/hypnosis - man you owe it to yourself to try EVERYTHING (positive) that you can to get your life back. These parasites steal our joy, peace, self esteem - but *they don't get to keep it forever*.
I haven’t dealt with this yet...yet. That I know of but the ex keeps me in the dark purposely anyhow
@Lord Rubz - Red Pill Rampage Hang on in there!!....I does take time but I promise you ...You will recover!...Complex PTSD..."From Surviving to Thriving"...Pete Walker...Is an excellent book....I think you can read it from Utube....Good Luck!
Sometimes I think being "in the dark" is helpful Andrew. Honestly I'm grateful that I haven't had the various guys shoved in my face over the last 7 years. Technically I haven't met any of them... Well I might have met one when I picked my daughter up for prom a couple of weekends ago. A "cop" friend was there so see my daughter off. Technically the guy is married and has kids of his own so I don't know if they ever "dated" - but it was odd to finally meet someone the kids have mentioned on and off for the last four years. But yeah, I'm find with the dark!
It's not moving on when they never face & confront the issues that caused the previous relationship to break up. They just carry more problems into the next relationship.
Oh god that sure is the truth DeeDee! Even if it appears good it's just their illusion and facade...
@@DSD IT'S an illusion that does not last either. Someone somewhere eventually catches on to their fairytale. By that time they have already destroyed a previous relationship and countless family only to wake up to more destruction upon their new relationship. It's a personal whirlpool of hell they create for themselves too.
That is so very true. I know it is sad for the current and future victims but it does show that they are just trapped in this nasty cycle of their own making. These others can hopefully heal but they can not...
Or they are really just perfect for another person, it happens
@Saphyr S. i moved on and it’s been great, now I’m happier than ever
A very important point to remind yourself is that the “connection” you have with your ex is NOT love!! Love can not exist in the presence of abuse. It’s a trauma bond. That’s it! If it is really bothering you because your abusive ex is with someone else it’s time to take a look in the mirror and work on yourself.
Counseling helped me a lot.
That is so true Jonathan!!! We really have to do the difficult work on our selves to ultimately heal from this!
WOW!! A trauma bond!!! That’s deep!!
Narcissists need supply, they will always move on (sometimes before the discard), and when you wake up, you realize just how fortunate you are. Sadly if you are in my place, you also understand just how dangerous this becomes for your kids.
I hear you Lords - it is a "fortunate" turn of events to be away from them - but there always is collateral damage and often time that is our children...
Lords of HVAC/R -- I am in your place.
Yes our sweet innocent kids. It's hard to see them suffer. They will see the truth. Try to remember to give them a safe place to land when they are with you ♡
@@tinamchenry64 💯💯💚🖤
Thank you for the video. It’s just hard when you’re being left hurt and lonely and realise that the narc is moving on happily with the new supply
Yeah I guess my ex boyfriend is moving on with the Girl he told me he would never date. Thanks for that
Or look like what he never date … that’s the kicker
General video topic idea. “Getting Robbed”. That is the best way I can describe coming out from one of these toxic relationships. The feeling of being robbed. Robbed of time, robbed of finances, robbed of your home, robbed of your kids. The list of robberies goes on and on. How to deal with these emotions and realities of being robbed. I think being robbed is a great analogy and perhaps the strategies to move on from this robbery will help many people.
Hmm - that's a good idea for a video Matthew - on top of being robbed we were also violated in a profound way. Unfortunately - most of the time - we also get forced to "support" the "robber" with threat of jail time... Thanks for the suggestion!
yeah that kept me up a few night...
They are so good with the threats and use of fear as intimidation - honestly it is NOT worth the risk of confronting them because of the aftermath they can cause.
Wow, the timing of your video is spot on. My ex-husband messaged me a few days ago and told me he was going to introduce our daughter to his significant other (notification was done per our parenting plan). It’s been a few years already since separation/divorce and I thought I was completely healed but it literally made me have a PTSD moment where I felt the panic and anxiety I used to feel when we were together. Luckily I realized what was going on and just breathed through it and it passed. Crazy how they can still trigger you years later. Thanks for the video!
Hi Reda welcome to the channel! Isn't it amazing how that crap can come rolling back. I'm wondering how I'll ultimately respond when she announces her new SO or brings them to an event. I'm glad you were able to catch yourself and get back on track. I suppose it's good that he informed you instead of just hearing about it from the kids.
How old is your daughter? And are you cool with your daughter meeting his significant other??
We would all be so so extremely very lost without your counsel. Thank you for giving all of us a compass to navigate this from North, South, East to West, that’s how massive this topic truly is.
Oh thank you so very much for those kind words Giacomo I really appreciate it! I'm trying to do my part to give back and help as those handle of people did for me when I was in my darkest days.
5 yrs . without her put downs, she knows shes damaged ,new supply got her pregnant, i have 2 children who i miss, but i am getting things done in peace, without her constant bi polar narssisistic personality. im here for my kids , if they ever want stability, i live alone and theres no way im living with a woman again,
Duane I can't thank you enough.... You have the specialist skills to be a counselor of narcissistic abuse and you have helped me and countless others.... THANK YOU AGAIN!
Thank you for saying that Simon! In all honesty though it is because I can share my story and that makes me more relatable. A therapist is bound by ethics and their licenses requirements to NOT do what I'm doing. So I think I fit a specialize niche that can really help people. My hope is that some folks will have good therapists that can leverage off what I'm doing to have those conversations to help their clients - I've heard that some have - which is wonderful to hear. I really do appreciate your support Simon! Share this if you know anyone else who needs to hear this message maybe we can save another lost soul!
Thank you again Duane for your understanding. The few people I've spoken to about the narcissistic abuse you, I and others have suffered have never even heard of such a thing and are simply unable to help. You DO fill a niche service in this respect and once I'm able to financially I'll send you something on Patreon or similar as a thank you. I'm going through property settlement at the moment and after a 12 year relationship my ex narc has hired an expensive lawyer and wishes to give me ZERO of our family home, contents and of course custody. Sound familiar LOL. I have a long memory and will not forget you and all you've done to help me! Stay safe and Narc Free brother...
Isn't it amazing how they have to guilt, remorse, ethics when it comes to this. They want *EVERYTHING* they can grab on to and will force the issue. It is amazing how a person can be so greedy, self absorbed and guilt or sense of fairness or fair play. It is so tough for people to understand who haven't been through it. Honestly even some who have been through are so jaded by it that their advice is "suck it up, I did". Simon I'm just grateful that I have a skill set and voice that I can give to this that is HELPFUL for others. When i was looking for divorce survival all I found were men/fathers filled with so much hate and bitterness (rightful so) but I knew it was unhelpful and doesn't do anything to help someone get their lives and joy back. So I'm not sure how long I'll be able to do this but I will definitely continue for as long as I can!
You could commercialize your experiences Duane and offer one on one counseling sessions to victims online. The 'Little Shaman Healing' does this successfully concerning Narc Abuse victims (taken off RUclips for God knows what reason, but can be found on FaceBook) with counselling sessions and as a way to successfully commercialize this try taking a look at 'Entrepreneurs in Cars' (RUclips) as a template for a successful second income stream. Just an idea.... Stay safe!
Good idea Simon! I have been considering doing coaching/mentoring (not counseling) but its just a time problem. The day-job gets in the way of a lot of that. I'm spread pretty thin as it is now so I'm not comfortable with including that right now. Although I have been considering opening up some limited time slots - I just haven't pressed the button on it yet. I do like what Entrepreneurs in Cars has done and damn he sure has grown - I found him around 30k subs. I don't know what the deal with Little Shaman and RUclips - that was really odd - did they kick her back off when she created another channel?
4:08 is so true. "The narcissistic ex is going to continually add chaos into the [children's lives] and you can counter that by providing stability."
That's the key Bianchi - it really comes down to that simple truth. The difficult part is that the kids aren't really going to come out and tell you that - BUT - if you watch closely you'll see it!
Spot on
I wrote a list of all the toxic qualities she brought into my life, all the ways she hurt me over and over even after I healthily/maturely expressed my boundaries, and what I realized is I’m so focused on “why wasn’t I good enough? Why didn’t she choose me?” And the real question is “why do I want someone that isn’t good for me? That can’t make me happy and isn’t healthy for me?” Getting over this person is about raising YOUR self worth, asking if people can bring you consistently healthy dynamics that meet your emotional, mental and physical needs. It doesn’t matter if they have moved on because your happiness and worth isn’t tied to them even if you’re still convinced of that lie. For now, enjoy being single, enjoy developing yourself and acknowledging the core wounds that brought you into this dynamic in the first place. They hurt you likely because they have no ownership of their healing, so do the opposite and own up to yours, that’s self love.
Thank you.
Oh my goodness! Life is so peaceful when my ex is seeing someone! I can always tell when they broke up because I get random motions in the mail. I feel bad for his current girlfriend but I’m also hoping for a marriage!
LOL I hear you on that one Promised Land!!! I think it would have hurt in the first couple of years but now it would be a relief!
I needed to hear it again! Really thank you! Two weeks after separation he found a new woman and met her with family and relatives. He rejected me and our daughter. He told everyone that is so happy and totally changed. Told stopped drinking, gamebaling, smoking etc. I was broken. Asking myself if I'm the reason, it's my fault maybe.I'm struggling with this blame till now.Felt not good enough for him. After 17 years I ment nothing, rubbish. After 6 months his new big love threw him out for a while and after that I blocked him and his family, I didn't need this crazyness anymore.It was one year and half ago but there is still pain and horrible moments for me. It's one year no contact I don't want to know what's happening with him. He just disappeared and my choice was to do the same, I had to save my mind. Two months ago he was walking around my flat and asked my neighbers for me but they lied him I don't live here. I feel sorry for him and angry to him at the same time although I know nothing for him. It's enough for me but so hard. You give me a strengh! Thank you so much!
Radina is it so tough and it is really difficult to get them out of our minds. I remember going through that where I just couldn't get away from the pain. That is where the absolute thinking and blackhole thinking were born from. But ultimately I think it was the hypnosis that *really* helped to break that hold. Heck there are still even times where I will catch myself wondering "why" and "what if" but at least now I can stop that thinking and get myself back on track. It really does just take time to heal from all of this - hopefully you are working through that pain though so that it just isn't buried. I made the mistake (because I didn't know better) of just burying those emotions and pain and then a year later they came back and it was really difficult to get through. So you will heal from this - it sounds like you are doing pretty good (in the overall healing process) and are on track!
@@DSD I have long way ahead but can see differences between now and year ago. It takes me hope for getting better. Thanks for shating your experiance!
Thank U For Sharing
What Is So Very Hurtful
Is Being DisCarded
And The Narcissists Has Absolutely Nothing To Do With Me
As If I Never Existed.
OMG it really is Demetria - it is so difficult to spend ANY time with a narc and then have them "flip that switch". I was working with a person earlier today who is seriously struggling with a short term 8-month relationship - and their pain is so similar to what we've all experienced. They really do burrow into our minds and it is such a journey to get them OUT.
DSD It
Really Is It Is So
Very Hurtful.
Moving On Is A Struggle
@@demigaines5644 I know you probably want understand this now but the reality is this person did you a favor. They are where they need to be and who they need to be with. Once you get over this person and move on without caring or thinking about what this person is doing, that's when everything changes they will try to come back in your life believe me but please be strong and don't allow them to.
My Personal
Thank You So
Very Much 🙏😢
Still coming to terms with it. 10 year relationship, divorced, immediately attempted to reconcile for 6 months afterwards, positive signs the whole time, only for her to abruptly cut me off and move on.
Afterwards, instant and complete 180 towards me, cold, not willing to entertain any conversation about us and the past, instant 0 contact. Certain she’s moved on, and wont say anything about it. The change was night and day from one day to the next.
Painful to feel that the person you knew is no more, yet they’re still alive. Its that weird cognitive dissonance that tortures me daily.
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
Message him for help 🙏
I'll need this video on a loop constantly for possibly the next few weeks to get me through a rough patch I've been going into with my own thoughts. Exactly what I needed to hear about this subject. Thanks again Duane! Keep fighting the good fight!
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
Message him for help 🙏
My ex is actively on dating apps etc, our son talks openly about it after his visits. A tiny part of me hurts but I have to remind myself who this person really is, 95% of me is relieved he’s finally moving on and focusing on someone else though I feel bad for whoever takes on this nightmare, the most of me hopes the new person is kind to our son and not crazy. Thanks for the heads up on the stability. Thanks for the honesty part on the end. It’s a tough thing to go through.
Oh I hear you on that one Baneful Things - I'm actually a bit relieved that she hasn't been "openly" dating except for the last couple of years. I'm not thrilled about her current boyfriend - seems to be a bit of a loser - but I'm glad the kids have been spared a laundry list of people come through the doors. But whomever it might one-day-be I just hope they are good to the kids...
WOW.. WOW!! Just yesterday i was watching the Easter church service on line where my son and his wife attend. My ex is not a member there but she was there yesterday morning. I saw her for the first time with her new Bo. Nothing like the type of man she would get with. Had that biker look, bald, heavy set with tatted arms. Nothing against this guy but it not they type of person she is attracted to. Its a very small church and they were sitting right in front of the camera. Seeing this man holding my newborn grandson and kissing him on his head just killed me Watching the two of them interact like our 28 year marriage was nothing kills me. Your videos open my eyes to more and more new things that i never saw before because i was not looking at it from the outside in. Now I am. I guess i needed to see this to help me move on. Thanks again :)
Hi Eddie, man that had to be rough to watch especially if you didn't expect it. Most of the time we can prepare - or avoid - situations like that. One thing to remember they don't really have a "type" they have supply. I think we get ourselves into trouble when we equate the way they "acted" with us as their true personality. They are chameleon and adjust to fit whomever they are with. It's really hard to watch that as well because it just messes with our brains. I suppose you're right - in some ways it may be helpful to have seen that - hopefully it doesn't linger with you for a while. The first time I had something like that - but not quite in your face as your experience - it effected me for a weeks... Hang in there Eddie!
@@DSD Yea i was hung up on the type of person My Ex Narc was involved in too,she was the complete opposite of me,,until i realised that he has no filters ,,,he did not care what her morals or boundaries were,,,she is just a supply of attention to him,,i don't feel sorry for the GF she interfered with my marriage and he walked away from it,,,she knew that he was married and had a very ill wife and a son ( small town) ,, Wow she now has a boogie prize LOL !!! and I got my life back !!! when i see them together which is very rarely ,,I still get a bit annoyed ,,cause they are so fake ! both of them,, He finally got what he wanted which is a hollow life !!!
Thank you Duane for your great videos ,,you help us all realise ,,we can get thru this and hopefully Learn,Love,and laugh about it in the end !!!!
Cathy you hit on a really important fact - they ARE fake and it IS difficult to see that. That REALLY used to bother me before because it just stung to see the lie in front of my face. With time we all learn that they can have their fake life and we'll just sit over here and get our GENUINE lives BACK!!!
The worst of all this is the effect it has on the children. Nothing worse than your children innocently telling you that Dad has a new friend that is a girl and finding a picture of them together. This info didn't come as a shock to me, it just makes me shake my head. Not sure if there is a respectful way to introduce your ex's new partner, especially when they are both going through a divorce.
Eddie A. We are all unfortunately going through this disgusting CRAP!
I still I'am shocked on how fast they can move on... It is so unnatural. It is just Evil really..
Perfectly timed. I've known about the new supply since just after she discarded me, but haven't let her know I know. I've been able to process all of it over time. She just informed me that she introduced the kids to him while on a cruise, and also mentioned he's moving away so the kids won't see him much. Seems like a good reason to not introduce him, but I guess I'm too logical. She also says she can help our daughter with her anger issues and we can stop taking her to therapy. Seems like more family changes (chaos) in her life is a good reason to stay in therapy to me. But what do I know, right? (sarcasm)
Wow - I was really expecting that story to go differently like - she introduced him and was either getting married OR moving in. Oh F'THAT on her "helping" seriously? I don't remember Spider, do you have any say on the therapy or is it entirely up to her?
@@DSD We're still in the process of the divorce and I've been the one pushing for kids therapy (even though we agreed in writing already) and using logic, guilt, shame, and a bit of playing dumb to encourage it. We're planning to move all of us across the country after the divorce to get the kids into a specific school district where we moved from about two years ago. I wish the divorce was final ASAP, but she keeps dragging her feet and blaming me for all the expenses/annoyance of the divorce. She doesn't like to be held accountable, surprise surprise.
Thanks Duane. I don't want him back, only care about my child. She's been in therapy for 5 years due to her dad's BS, abuse, and lies. Nobody remembers why. I was smeared before it started. The ex has had GFs longer than we'd been separated. My daughter told me that her, the roommate, and gramna have been praying they separate. She's either also a narc or will be destroyed as I was. They changed churches, supposed Christians, which we've always been. I took her to church on Easter stressed I'd run into them. You know my history. I think they missed the 10 commandments...Adultery, etc...lol. She's not always kind to my daughter, sometimes outright cruel...sad. Hope you had a nice Easter my friend ♡
Thank you for all you do. You give me & others clarity & hope navigating ourselves out of these traumatic narcissistic relationships. No one else understands, unless they've been through it. You understand, you are a godsend 🙏💖
Thank you so much for your support Patsy I really appreciate it! It is so difficult for us and for others who support us that just don't understand, as you said, unless they've been through it. I'm just grateful I can make something positive out of all of this!
I had a very jealous fiancé and I spent a long time praying for him to find another woman, otherwise he wouldn't let me go. It worked, thanks God! You can see in the news the amount of women daily killed by their jealous men.
That had to be scary Maura and glad he finally "let go".
Wow Sam - I haven't heard that story before - *never give up*!
Alot of women play and string men along long after the breakup because thats how 90 percent of women are options and backup plans its just female nature i knew a guy who was seperated with his wife however they was still seeing each other and hooking up well one day the guy decides to go on lunch break to see his wife little did he know another man was there husband flipped out and banged on the door the new guy had a gun on him and shot the husband dead at the door stories like that and knowing female nature is why i dont even try anymore you can either keep burning your hand on the stove until it burns you and the whole house down or you can accept reality and stop touching the hot stove
My ex fiancee whom I proposed to in April broke up with me 1.5 months after accepting my proposal. I became super cold and mean. I was acting needy and etc for weeks until giving to the break up. We were together for 2 years and we had toxic moments but I was very good to her. Our biggest issue was me suspecting her infidelity. She denied all the accusations. I was in NC for 11 days when I had a strange feeling to drive past her apartment. Mind you I wasn't doing that before at all. I rode by and I saw her and some guy walking out her apt and he was taking out the garbage. Like wtf , I was the one doing that. She really moved on fast. This was the closure I needed although it tore my guts out. I had to text her and tell her what I saw and how grateful I was to see it after being gas lighted for so long. That b*tch really had this dude over there playing house after we were engaged. The old me would have acted a fool but I took it on the chin and left.
I can feel your pain in your message. I pray you are healing and whole. God has someone just for you.
You will get a real wife. I will pray for your healing!
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation..
Message him for help 🙏..
The one who discarded me after 10 years just couldn’t admit it was because I was no longer useful and that there was, of course, a new supply. Anyway, that was the dealbreaker, the denial is in itself a pathological lie. They know when you know as well but it’s still difficult to let them go mentally. I’ve watch many of your videos on this Duane and highly recommend them as they’ve helped me tremendously. Thank you. X x
I'm glad they've helped A - I think the reason they do is because I've been there... I've struggled to let her go, just like you talked about and most people go through. This is such a difficult experience and I think being able to really relate to someone REALLY HELPS. Anyway I'm grateful to be able to offer something that can help and to have been able to turn this difficult situation into something positive that is transforming lives - okay maybe I'm being a bit over the top - but that is my goal at least!
After a 15yr relationship 3 kids and a home together .she pushed me out a yr ago and now says she been in seeing someone since Oct. 3 months .. a lie she blending the new fam .around my kids constantly and in my home . In order to get joint custody I had to agree to volunteer a order for 6 months so she can move in peace still keeping it all a secret . I had to put pieces together. Can't loose my cool in order not to break order and loose joint custody .. evil vendective woman
Yes it is extremely difficult and painful to work true this and detach your self from them
And yes I can see how fake it was our relationship
There are ‘no free lunches’, meaning: (life will catch up) - if they are frolicking around projecting ‘wonderful’.
Seriously, that’s nice (unphased).
You know how they work and what it all means.
Most do not!
It is much easier (for survivors) to take this indifferent mindset, re: them moving on with another, once out and healed - it will happen (not over-night, but it will happen!)
Spot on Carol and I can tell you from my personal experience when I didn't know what I was dealing with - and wasn't yet a "survivor" it was tearing me up inside. Once you see through the facade and understand what is driving them it is MUCH easier. Sure there are times where I am sad about how this has all played out BUT I am so grateful to be away from that environment. I really believe it would have killed me had I not escaped...
DSD you are so truthful Duane - that’s why people benefit! In the beginning it is gut wrenching pain (b/c you’ve given your heart & soul, and endured). I am so glad you are out - such an inspiration for those who are not quite there yet.
The most difficult time is in the beginning yes! Emotions are fresh.
I know I would have died or lived in poverty had I not acted when I did - sounds dramatic to some, but a tragic certainty. Those who have lived to tell (or share) know.
Again, so glad you are out - I believe every word!!!
You hit on another important point - when we *try* to explain this to others they think we are over dramatic and embellishing our stories and situations. That ultimately makes things worse. But yes, anyone who has *really* been through this can absolutely understand and relate. We are all so much stronger than we ever thought - some aren't or they just fall through the cracks and are lost. My/our goal is to catch those before them become lost!
This guy is amazing.
Thanks Jason, I’m grateful if I was able to help!
Jason Cooke indeed
Great video!!! It’s like you were talking about me. My ex was dating a new guy within a few months of ending a 20 year marriage. She would make a big deal about how great her new guy was. How he is all the things I’m not. It hurt bad but in the end it was the best thing. My divorce process although not smooth went ok. I ended up with 60/40 custody. My kids were told they would have to just deal with her “new”life. Although I feel badly for what my kids were dealing with I was the stable parent and have gotten much closer with them. She was to busy with her new guy to put up a big fight. She was more interested in discarding me and her “old” life.
I think new supply can work to your advantage as long as you are getting proper help to keep your head.
I hear you on that CWB and although painful it can really help. I'm assuming you mean you have the 60% time? That is *outstanding* if that's what you meant. I know its hard on everyone but at least the kids know who is stable and loving and who has lost their mind.
DSD yes I get 60%. I work a job that works a 24 hour shift. Her new guy has a more traditional 50/50 custody of his child. She wanted to mimic his but that would means a few of my days I wouldn’t be home at all. I argued the fairness of this and wanted a schedule that took into account my work schedule. In the end I was granted every Thursday to make up for the lost time and she could take them if she wanted on my work days. (I’m still amazed that a court approved this) It’s been almost 2 years and I think she has taken the kids twice on days I was at work. So I get 8 days and she gets 6 days. I really feel bad for my kids. They are older and can manage being on there own but it’s not ideal.
I like you struggled with the reality of everything. I just couldn’t believe the stuff she was doing. I honestly thought I was losing my mind. Thank god I had a good therapist. Somehow I held it all together.
Yeah it's tough but honestly the kids probably enjoy the chaos free time at your place even if you are at work. I think for the most part if both parties agree the judge will just hack off on it. The only time they generally question is if one person is really giving away the farm so to speak but a schedule is just a schedule. Man I hear you about losing your mind - I really thought I was going crazy and yeah it just wasn't a fun time...
My ex wife is seeing someone new. This is like her 6th relationship. The boys seem to like him. I only remain neutral and polite and wish them the best. I know when my ex is trying to make me jealous but i remain cool about it. I am also happily remarried so it doesn''t matter to me.
I am struggling with this issue everyday (over three months now). In my heart, I wish she would just get the help she needs and work on herself. Instead, she is seeing someone new to manipulate. I should be happy it's not me.
Mine sent me a note. I burned that shitty note and haven't spoken to her since. Two years now
Good for you!
Folks, don’t feel bad that your disordered ex has moved on. My disordered ex found a young girlfriend and I got my get-out-of-jail card. Unfortunately for me, my ex got dumped by his young girlfriend, and my ex started to hoover me and stalk me. It was scary as hell. So now I pray to God that my disordered ex finds a new supply soon.
Ugh well the hoovering and stalking part don't sound good but having them focus on their new "young" supply is nice. I hope its not too bad - are you worried about it?
DSD I’m not as worried now as I was 3 months ago. One wintry night when a storm door was swinging in the Chicago wind, I was so afraid that my disordered ex was outside my home that I called the cops. Fortunately the officers found an unlatched storm door. So that was the level of fear that I had at one point. I still feel vulnerable and exposed. I don’t feel safe anymore. I mourn the loss of freedom from fear.
I really liked your video buddy. Good empathy and way of relating and taking your time relating. That’s really important to people because a lot of other coaches just rush past the part where we re grieving and what we are going through.
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation..
Message him for help 🙏..
Pain is odd, I think about how I feel a lot, I’ve grown since we broke up, but I’m still attached and heart broken and it’s been 6 months, I truly care about what is best for them but I struggle with anger
I know how u feel trust me. Its been a year and I’m totally over the breakup and everything but the thoughts of betrayal and not being good enough creep back in and haunts me and i get angry that someone actually did that to me…but i snap out of it easily.
@@mrclapz1488 mines a little different. It's been 2 years since I've talked to her. But because we worked together.. we broke up like 3 years ago but it is also the betrayal and trust that's gets me because she never told why she treated me the way she did when I asked her.. but I still have her on Facebook and she recently put a picture of her new guy.
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
Message him for help 🙏
OMG she was WELCOME to him. I feel sorry for her. When you see them for what they really are, you won't miss them. You'll get down on your knees and thank the lord that they are gone.
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
Message him for help 🙏
It was a “NIGHTMARE” I was discarded in the dead of freezing Canadian winter I was petrified and a new woman replaced me immediately!🥶🇨🇦
I am so sorry, how are u now? Are u freezing ?
Good advice, I have struggled because he left by text after 20 yrs without even saying he was unhappy. He then hooked up with a work colleague while I was looking after sick kids/parents. I was attached but obviously he wasn’t. Therapy is hard to get in the UK.
My ex. met someone a month ago. They are already talking about getting married.
We have two sons. The younger one primarily lives with his Dad.
We share him. He will not tell us her name. He is so delusional.
Good thing I talk with a Social Worker, and have my faith in Jesus.
His new relationship Is likely not going to last. Its going too fast & will soon crash. Im praying for you
After my second ex started seeing someone new over and over again while at the same time he was making sure to introduce her to me again right away the pain I felt at first while he was constant ordering me to stay away from our children was my worry about them. Like when my youngest was crying non-stop in his crib all day long for the first few weeks at his dad's house except when his dad was gone when people babysitting him were letting me talk to him on the telephone. That youngest child of mine who is a son does not remember that ordeal too anymore and that is normal. When his dad was not introducing me to his latest common law lover or his latest dalliance with a married woman being made in charge of his and his close in age sister's care instead of me his biological mother people would tell me what they found out went on with that which I didn't care to know too. Those 2 children of ours and another one born to his 3rd wife who left him next suffered a lot due to his neglect and his emotional abuse too. I cannot undo the past for my children. All I can do now is to make up my mind to feel grateful in advance if he manages to leave a large inheritance behind for them. Without wondering who is going ot outlive whom.
Thanks mate, Love your videos. And right now they are really helping me.
Thank you Alesis for the support! I'm glad these are helping you - I hope you're starting to see and believe there is light at the end of the tunnel!
ZERO control. Zero.
Ugh I filed divorce and it's in-house seperation....its tearing me up. Now I'm stuck in the house indefinitely because of the virus. It kills me...I honestly don't know if I will make it. This is beyond devastating. His chronic partying is curtailed (hookers, booze and concerts...$1500-$2,000 a month on his lifestyle.), temporarily...it was beyond triggering. I feel like I'm being punished (in his mind I am)....I cant live like this much longer. He lies, cheats and steals. It's a lonely existence, where I'm forced into the role of mother....hello, madonna-whore. I believe he found my "replacement"...so I get to witness this front and center. Since I filed, hes doubling down on the abuse, while being dismissive. I enjoy your videos. More men need to come foward about abuse. You seem genuine...the others are narcs trying to cash-in...
I lost all feelings for my ex when I found her who she really was and the things she did, but I do struggle when she's seemingly so happy taking our kid (we have shared custody) with the man she cheated on me with and later she cheated on him with me (long story). I know I can't really do anything but accept the situation, I just hope my ex doesn't create drama that affects our kid.
Sorry man. Hoping is good, but planning might be better. I've just lowered my expectations and take the craziness as it comes. If I find myself emotionally invested in her craziness, I recognize it's time to lower my expectations further.
@@spider3772 Thank you for your words, yeah my lawyer contacted the mother of my kid and basically informed her about the legal consequences if she tries to force our kid to do anything she (5 year old) doesn't want, lying to me about her / lying to her about me and other behavior that could impact her emotional stability and development. My ex turned out to be a malignant sociopath and NPD, a pathological liar capable of juggling several "personas" (realities) and relationships at the same time, crazy stuff.
That's good David - I wish I could have arrived at that point but it took me *years* to get to that point. Its going to be tough for your kids, just make sure you keep your "house" stable and loving for them and minimize the drama and chaos. That is a huge help and as long as the kids have one stable house/parent it can save them from this nightmare...
@@DSD Thanks a lot from Spain where I watch all your videos and read every comment. I developed the best version of myself in every way I could just to be there for my kid at all times, it was a blessing that figuring out the narcissist opened my eyes that I needed a change and that change was for the best. However, I do not like at all that the narcissist is taking my kid with this man because with the things that happened still lingering (she cheated on him with me after she discarded me and this man knows about it, but for whatever reason he's always forgiving her) I fear the drama and chaos that no doubt she will create at some point, my kid is my whole life and I can only accept that some things I cannot control, time will tell.
Spain!!! I love Spain and lived there from 1990 until 1993. I was near Morón de la Frontera and Sevilla! I can't speak Spanish any more (and I wasn't that great while I was there) but the people were WONDERFUL, the countrysides were beautiful, and I LOVED the food and tapas. I was fortunate to be in a small place with a minimum amount of Americans so the locals were VERY hospitable... I have to admit it was annoying when we'd go to "tourist spots" like Torremolinos the Americans there could be pretty obnoxious.
Keep in mind David that narcissistic personalties have a unique ability to create a strong bond (typically a trauma bond) with their targets so it is not uncommon for them to be able to ensnare a previous ex. If they weren't able to heal and come to terms with who they are then yes this can happen. It is so difficult to not be able to stop this from happening to your children but again the best you can do is be there for them and make sure you are stable and loving for them. I know that doesn't "fix" the immediate problem but you have to pivot your focus or you'll drive yourself crazy.
Be very wary of therapy as a lot of therapists have little or no clue on cluster B disorders esp NPD etc..
Good I'm glad there seeing someone else let them be a anther person headache. The truth is I never want my ex in my life and now I'm still healing when it boils down to it. That really show me that she never was supposed to be part of my life.
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
Message him for help 🙏
Duane, thank you for helping me understand.
Resource that helped\helping me: DSD
Each day is a day closer to being healed from all of this Run!
@@DSD yes
👍🏻
Terrific video. Great advice!
Thanks so much Donna and I'm glad it was helpful - but sad you are going through this.
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation..
Message him for help 🙏..
I appreciate this video so much! Thanks man!
I'm glad it is helpful! Hang in there Michael! It takes time to heal from this and unfortunately there is no way to rush it - no matter how much we'd like too...
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
Message him for help 🙏
My ex has a new partner after 1month of our break up and she hides it from me. 😞 they already 3months now and looks very happy on social media.
Never saw any pic of my ex-fiancee with the other guy, however I saw her relationship status. I'm trying my best to not check her profile, sometimes it's hard, I know, but it's not gonna bring any benefit to us.
my ex was on the phone with other
person before he ever left me thats one of the reason I kicked him out
Well typically they have new supply lined up before they ever leave (or get caught)... I imagine he's with that person now unless if he's moved on from that one as well...
DSD he's still there and shes everything is wonderful shes a criminal like him better her than me. the bmw is totalled he put insurance on the bmw longer enough to total it.
Well sorry about the car but yeah better her than you Sy!
@@DSD cars are replaceable i have a car I haven't paid any payments since I've had the car I'm driving a free car as and he doesn't have one
Well there you go!
We dated for 1.5 years. We broke up in late June come to find out in July she hooked up with others.. such a blow. Idk what to do anymore I’m so low right now.
when i left my ex our relationship was really unhealthy there was no scene in keeping my head down and if i moved my head up or if she feels that my eyes looked at an object then there was something for her to fright with me on who i was looking at so when i packed up my stuff and left i didn't care about if she found a new victim all i know if she found someone new it wont last for long her longest relationship after me was only one year and the next one didn't even last 6 months but when i found someone new she started to refuse my daughter to me cause my new girlfriend was way more attractive then her
I hear you on that Tim - sometimes just getting the heck away is a huge victory in itself! I hope with her new supplies, even if short lived, she keeps her focus OFF of you!
Tim your daughter is beautiful and blessings to you and your family.
It’s horrible and the Canadian system is “USELESS” they cannot judge, are you kidding me? A married man
Our wedding was supposed to be at the 15th of January, cancelled two weeks before. Then he got married at 12 of February. Like if he got her out of the wardrobe!! She was there when i was blind.. How could this happen
Hello dear, true love never die don't give up anything in life all hope is not lost...
I know a great powerful man that can help you get your ex or crush back forever without stress and delay,he have solution t all problem.
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@@critabeneta4598 thank u so much ❤ I'm so heartbroken and I don't know.what to do or weather if i can take him back (If he returns) or not.. The person i loved is dead and replaced with an evil. I still love the old one.
Thank you for the valuable advice.
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation..
Message him for help 🙏..
You are not alone friend for 5 years now it s going on and she know hiw to open my wound back.
She go as far as texting me how she is happy how since she find the love of her life....o stable human being would never say that to their ex if they had the most basic empathy.
Well Duane help me over and over...years after years..cuz it s all the same thing with the new supply...they cgange every 3 month and no it will never work with any of them ...most of the time we are empath peoples who got caught in their net of lie for too long..but do t worry friend you are at the right place for help Duane is an amazing guy.
Hold on tight we are with you brother xxx
Thank you for sharing that Wolf and I hope the new folks read your comments but that truth can really help set you free. It still isn't easy BUT it isn't forever! Wolf I really appreciate your support and I'm grateful that I've been of help to you!
Tomorrow, I m going to change my telephone number. I called the Police because of this person. I m going to change my bank account etc. etc. I m tired.
Story of my current life!
Nice one.. thanks for enlightenment..
Absolutely Anna and thank you for the comment and your support!
Thank you for saying it's normal.
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
Message him for help 🙏
absolute illusion, she wanted to "marry" me, i was her "soulmate", she would be with me "forever" she wants a "baby" with me...
after a 4 year relationship, 2 weeks after NC she puts a new profile pic with new dude and blocks me lol
yeah tbh. Wooooooooow!!!!!!!
yeah tbh. I’m with you on that bro. With my ex for 4 years. Told me all the same things. Now she’s with some guy 20 years older. My heart is smashed. My soul is dead. I pray every night not to wake up the following day. I still loved her and I hate myself for it.
Same thing happened to me but we were together for a one year ..hope your doing better
@@liliad.7448 honestly am still not over her and have had nobody since her. i'm in much better physical condition now though, but still depressed about how she threw our 5 years in the trash.
@@yeahtbh.161 That's awsome am so happy for you ...be stronger 💪 smarter, better that's what I am focusing on too it been a month and 2 weeks and I already lost so much weight due to my workouts ...when I read your comment I realized how am not the only one that goes through this type of hell but am trying to remain positive every single day is my first heartbreak and its the hardest thing I have ever endured ..so thanks for posting your story
Me and this girl were on and off "talking" for 3 months, we were always on and off because she didnt want to be in a relationshio yet because she was still trying to get over her ex. After 3 months of me trying to date her, i gave up and quit talking to her for 3 weeks, now shes talking to somebody else. Wth
That's exactly what's happening now. I don't know if she's talking to someone else but it just feels wrong.
I don't know if you feel used, I get that feeling a lot.
Getting your ex back/ crush /so /spouse / third party/ shouldn't be a problem I got my love back with the help of Mr osekhametalor
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Would you like to make your ex lover enter into a state of panic and confusion that will have her crazily thinking about being with you, without having to use "dirty techniques" or "cunning lies"? I'd personally 𝗀𝗈𝗈𝗀𝗅 Treitan Mellory's approach. You can certainly take it as far as you desire, so long as you wish.
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
Message him for help 🙏
I just cannot understand one thing about my ex-wife👭💔: she left me after she stole a large amount of our savings💲. BUT why she left if i was offering her money even after this had happen? She left and sometimes was stalking me but in a way that not persistent. And she could be getting more financial resources from me all this time. Why she chose to not go on with using me? The only explanation i can find that she is sick in her head. I cannot come up with any other explanation. Usually narc leaves a victim ONLY if victim has no resources left. This is not a case here🤔
Getting your ex back/ crush /so /spouse / third party/ shouldn't be a problem I got my love back with the help of Mr osekhametalor
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Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation..
Message him for help 🙏
That makes no sense to me Dwayne when there are children in the home?
My situation is that my ex has a new boyfriend of 4 months, but has been orbiting my Snapchat and Instagram stories everyday for 7 months, now.
Hello friend, true love never die don't give up anything in life all hope is not lost forever.
i know a great powerful man that can help you get back your ex or crush forever without stress and delay, He also helped me too immediately. he have solution to all kind of problems.
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Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation..
I don’t have control now and I sure didn’t during the relationship when he cheated on me 😂😭
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
Message him for help 🙏
Like after 6th period he got out first from his class so I was behind him and he looked behind me outside and he stopped and gave me a handshake and we walked together and we talked and I was like so happy until he told me :(
I'm in pain now and I'm trying to figure out what the hell happened to me now unhappily ever after
I absolutely will have no pain when my x moves on I need him to move on he was a cheater!!!
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
Message him for help 🙏
How do I protect my teens this is crazy!🥶🇨🇦
Despite social media these people dont chsnge. They will follow the sane cannot maintsin relationships of any kind ..
What if she introduces the kids before I've met him? We verbally agreed we would meet that person before we introduced them to kids? It sux
Also agreed, in 1.5 yrs this is her 3rd boyfriend...but I guess it's more serious now that she put it out on Facebook and Instagram!
My ex narc was married when I was caught up in his game then he used his wife n her close friend as his flying monkeys n got me out of the picture. Now he's putting pics of his wife's friend.. He's seeing her now I guess n she's his wife's best friend. What's going on? Someone please help me understand this
Hi Julia - well the problem with people like this is that they live and thrive in chaos. They also have ZERO boundaries and NOTHING is off limits. So sleeping with his wife's best friend is fine for someone like that. This is why they leave a path of destruction and heartache in their wake.
@@DSD ty for replying God bless
Sounds like a lot of dysfunction!! Do not get caught up in the triangulation. It's just not worth it and will only make you feel worse.
She’s someone else’s problem now..
I hear you on that one. It’s just too bad it takes people a while to realize that is the truth!
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
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My ex dumped me.. N 3 days later went with someone new.. N now not even 6 months later I came to know tht they already live together 👀👀👀🤯 n she look ladikos n not even close to his ex wife or me... Old, blond, ladikos
Calida 89 I know of a man who helped me get my ex back
Calida 89 within twenty four hours
Any tips for making sure my daughter (5years old) keeps loving me despite the hate campaign by the ex wife and ex mother in law? I live in a different country since divorcing but would very very much have her visit me once she is old enough to travel
Hello dear, true love never die don't give up anything in life all hope is not lost...
I know a great powerful man that can help you get your ex or crush back forever without stress and delay,he have solution t all problem.
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@@critabeneta4598 who daid anything about wanting that psycho back? You and your ads are disgusting
Thank you for you’re video. 13 year marriage two kids it hurts.
Yeah it really does Joe - it really screws with your mind how things change. How far into this are you and do you get to see your kids?
Is the second week of cooperating,We’re meeting at the police department to pick up and drop off the kids,I think I got it easy she filed for divorce she’s paying for the attorney and she moved out and got an apartment.
They are all cheaters😪. Let them go💔
Getting your ex back/ crush /so /spouse / third party/ shouldn't be a problem I got my love back with the help of Mr osekhametalor
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Thank you
Hang in there HalfRedNation.
Can you do a vlog how to handle. With his new girlfriend that is more go attractive than me. I feel insecure. Bcoz she is pretty. Sexy and rich and have a nice work. Don’t know how to handle. Feeling insecure
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation
Message him for help 🙏
So am I
Do you mean you're seeing someone else Stella?
Kind of.
Good for you - hope it is going well - just take everything slow! 😀
Hypnosis link?
Sure, www.dadsurvivingdivorce.com/resources
10:43 Thank you x
pity da fool..narcissist love to share pain..witch exists..now and future for all..pain
That is VERY true kookiecanuck - I was just commenting to another how they leave a path of destruction and pain in their wake - it is just unfortunately their "nature" to not nurture!
OBTW - good to see you in the comments again!
thanks buddy downtrodden..the games never end @@DSD
onething narcs create for us is a fulltime job of exposing and shoveling bullshit
ruclips.net/video/ww-f4glTOdw/видео.html
Sure feels that way Kookiecanuck and I know your situation is much more complicated than mine...
Story of my life ahahaa
Getting your ex back/ crush /so /spouse / third party/ shouldn't be a problem I got my love back with the help of Mr osekhametalor
Whxapp him now for help
+=1=(=3=2=3=)=9=1=6=9=1=6=9
Hey friend I got my relationship fixed back with the help of a man who brought my partner back in 48 hours after many years of separation..
Message him for help 🙏..