Oblivion NPC Dialogue

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  • Опубликовано: 8 сен 2024
  • do ya like hot fudge sundaes?????

Комментарии • 393

  • @Korgano
    @Korgano 3 года назад +765

    “Thinner slices are more tender. You can always come back for more.” “Okay.” Persuasion 100

    • @johnsala1619
      @johnsala1619 3 года назад +20

      Same price for the buffet, just get less food... allriiight

    • @Korgano
      @Korgano 3 года назад +24

      Quest Updated: Preserve the Beef.

    • @bkvike
      @bkvike 3 года назад +2

      how does that work exactly?

    • @offensivejerk
      @offensivejerk 3 года назад +2

      Epic

    • @scdevon
      @scdevon 2 года назад +9

      "At Country Buffet, we don't limit ham, but we do limit ham waste"........
      (by making the customer get up and walk over and wait in line for small portions over and over).

  • @Dweller415
    @Dweller415 3 года назад +571

    Every time the country buffet shows up on my recommended videos, I feel as if I’m sliding deeper and deeper into a cult. 😳

    • @danylo-antonii1607
      @danylo-antonii1607 3 года назад +68

      You can always come back for more

    • @Erix7810
      @Erix7810 3 года назад +5

      Lolol

    • @mgmegt5920
      @mgmegt5920 3 года назад +23

      Have you tried the lasagna?

    • @whynottalklikeapirat
      @whynottalklikeapirat 2 года назад +18

      Because you are. Have you decided on what you'd like for dessert yet?

    • @senorpimps4678
      @senorpimps4678 2 года назад +2

      Dudes creepy talking to my daughter like that

  • @curranjohnson7489
    @curranjohnson7489 Год назад +74

    Legend has it that lady is still waiting for that slice of ham to this day

  • @josepvinals5621
    @josepvinals5621 3 года назад +152

    That lady is enjoying being teased with the slice of meat, intense scene.

  • @Abandoned_Brane
    @Abandoned_Brane 3 года назад +186

    When he pulls the meat away, it hurts my soul

    • @mawenzheng8374
      @mawenzheng8374 3 года назад +9

      That’s what she said

    • @StumpfsCurse
      @StumpfsCurse 3 года назад +3

      You'll get nothing and like it! ☹

    • @percival8193
      @percival8193 Год назад +2

      but you can always come back for more

  • @Mike-pj1kv
    @Mike-pj1kv 3 года назад +99

    I told myself "now don't you cry". But that part with the ham really got to me.

  • @techstyle123
    @techstyle123 3 года назад +226

    This runs better than cyberpunk

    • @ahabduennschitz7670
      @ahabduennschitz7670 3 года назад +19

      a crippled 80 year old who lost his leggs in vietnam runs better than cyberpunk

    • @NemesisOgreKing
      @NemesisOgreKing Год назад

      @@ahabduennschitz7670 you fucking killed me. 🤣🤣🤣

  • @Cx10110100
    @Cx10110100 3 года назад +109

    This has better plot than most of the movies and tv series they churn out today

  • @rieshamilton8502
    @rieshamilton8502 3 года назад +68

    What grade are you in school?
    Awkward laughing
    Have you decided what dessert you want?
    Awkward silent laughing
    Do you like hot fudge sundaes?
    Awkward silence

  • @crashdavis721
    @crashdavis721 3 года назад +116

    Can you help me load this couch into my van?

  • @Serpicoprime
    @Serpicoprime 2 года назад +5

    Would you care for some Ham or Beef. Ham please "cuts the beef"

  • @toadelevator
    @toadelevator 3 года назад +76

    I saw this training film months ago. Just yesterday I started looking at all the Oblivion NPC memes. And now two of my favorite things have been combined? Alchemy level 100.

  • @DevoutSkeptic
    @DevoutSkeptic 3 года назад +23

    He's even weaing chainmail 0:53

    • @ZeranZeran
      @ZeranZeran 3 месяца назад

      lmao I never noticed that

  • @ScotchBeard78
    @ScotchBeard78 3 года назад +55

    This made me laugh way harder than it had any right to.

  • @JackieAprileJr
    @JackieAprileJr 3 года назад +35

    We need a "Where are they now" episode on this guy

    • @CptCool-xt8ht
      @CptCool-xt8ht 3 года назад +1

      Outstanding idea.

    • @johnsala1619
      @johnsala1619 3 года назад +4

      Google Old Country Buffet guy, he actually got it on YT, of course now many spinoffs

    • @JackieAprileJr
      @JackieAprileJr 3 года назад +11

      @@johnsala1619 allriight

    • @johnsala1619
      @johnsala1619 3 года назад +1

      @@JackieAprileJr Mmmhmm

    • @Grgaforniateezy
      @Grgaforniateezy Год назад +2

      I only replied to your comment outta respect for your fawtha

  • @franksmythe6969
    @franksmythe6969 3 года назад +11

    The tenderness has absolutely zero to do with the thickness of the cut after it's already cooked. That line is just designed to save product knowing full well that 90% of people probably won't come back up.

    • @scdevon
      @scdevon 2 года назад +4

      Thinner slices are better for our bottom line.....errrr.....I mean they're more tender.

    • @shawnsimmons4718
      @shawnsimmons4718 4 месяца назад

      The “give me that” guy is the 10%

    • @lionelhutz5137
      @lionelhutz5137 2 месяца назад

      Those were hamster sized servings tho

  • @Rottenberg666
    @Rottenberg666 3 года назад +21

    They can always come back for more, but usually they don't because they feel awkward about it. Profit.

    • @bryangooden4298
      @bryangooden4298 Год назад +2

      That's exactly why they have a carver at all. If they were to put out a tray with all the good stuff people would take it and not fill up on the the cheap shit like mashed potatoes.

    • @lionelhutz5137
      @lionelhutz5137 2 месяца назад

      Carver: "That's your second helping, are you really still hungry?"

  • @danny-li6io
    @danny-li6io 3 года назад +7

    1/2 inch cut lady.....”it doesn’t really matter how thick you cut it, it’s all going in a ziploc bag in my purse”.

    • @scdevon
      @scdevon 2 года назад +3

      "You can always get up, walk across the restaurant, wait in line and get another tiny bit more".

    • @Man0fMeans
      @Man0fMeans 4 месяца назад

      lmfao

  • @DeerOcelot
    @DeerOcelot 3 года назад +31

    Everytime i hear him say "Alright" it makes me wants to be his friend. He probably have speech at maximum.

  • @kd4pba
    @kd4pba 3 года назад +64

    You can't really "always" come back for more. You do know that right?

    • @royythaboi7163
      @royythaboi7163 3 года назад +1

      Huh? What do ya mean?

    • @johnsala1619
      @johnsala1619 3 года назад +4

      @@royythaboi7163 Like after the store closes through the fire exit, or a week later and say "I paid for the all you can eat buffet last Thursday, so top me up", or in most places nowadays since most OCB locations are out of business and the lad in the video has long moved on with his life. Ahhh, nothing lasts forever.

    • @hippojuice23
      @hippojuice23 3 года назад +2

      @@johnsala1619 I think you're awesome!

  • @justinrodriguez3430
    @justinrodriguez3430 2 года назад +4

    That old ladys plate was looking mad weak

  • @nitroboy4342
    @nitroboy4342 Год назад +4

    I watched it once when I was feeling down, and it somehow made me feel alright?
    The music, the poor acting and voice lines get so emotional when filled with the serenity of this guy's voice

  • @Komotau4691
    @Komotau4691 4 года назад +30

    Now this is real. Full of lags :D

  • @greenonions7492
    @greenonions7492 3 года назад +4

    This video has been showing up on my recommendations a little bit over a year, it feels like. Finally someone made it into npc video😻😻😻😻😻👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

  • @catjuice8420
    @catjuice8420 3 года назад +18

    GIMME THAT!

  • @jamesbeyou8279
    @jamesbeyou8279 3 года назад +9

    He gave it his all!!! Whilst dying inside legend

  • @Reaper-3000
    @Reaper-3000 3 года назад +7

    I'm sorry to differ with you sir, but you are the caretaker. You've always been the caretaker. I should know sir. I've always been here.

  • @MrMattSax
    @MrMattSax Год назад +4

    I’m shocked at how emotionally invested I am in her getting that ham…

  • @shawnraj7816
    @shawnraj7816 2 года назад +2

    He should have pulled the ham away from the little girl who wasnt responding

  • @kingriddick6989
    @kingriddick6989 Год назад +2

    This is Owen Wilson in his most Oscar worthy performance

  • @RedSiegfried
    @RedSiegfried 3 года назад +5

    As a kid, I always hated it when adults initiated forced small talk with me. I wished they'd just shut up. As a matter of fact, I still do.

  • @mattjorgdbb
    @mattjorgdbb 3 года назад +6

    Why is the internet so magical

  • @carlosguerrero1956
    @carlosguerrero1956 Год назад +3

    The fact that this guy can slice a piece of ham horizontally, perfectly even makes me tingle. My horizontal cuts start out even but end with one end much thicker than the other. Subway employees always get confused and uncomfortable with my envious glances

  • @vincevega0
    @vincevega0 13 дней назад +1

    “Did you watch the game last night?”
    “I couldn’t. I was undergoing chemo.”
    “Alright.”

  • @zachariahswartz5970
    @zachariahswartz5970 Год назад +4

    When he keeps taunting that lady at the end by putting the meat on her plate and then taking it back.. I just lose it😂

    • @hotsauce69247
      @hotsauce69247 Год назад

      Like those damn Turkish ice cream guys 😭

  • @musclesforsupes
    @musclesforsupes Год назад +1

    I remember a commercial going “Old Country Buffet…you better be hungry.”

  • @spockspock
    @spockspock 3 года назад +5

    I sometimes dream of greasy, meat bit laden chain mail gloves touching my body and awake screaming, screaming, screaming....

    • @twentytwo138
      @twentytwo138 2 года назад

      Grasy meaty Bin Laden touching your body with chain mail gloves
      Sounds like my type of porn.

  • @atlas_of_prescottia
    @atlas_of_prescottia 3 года назад +5

    The child is cut content, and thusly has no dialogue.

  • @mikebrophy
    @mikebrophy Год назад +5

    We need a version where he's serving Chigurh from "No Country for Old Men." "Want some ham, Friendo?"

    • @djackmanson
      @djackmanson Год назад +1

      "Ham? Or beef? Guess"

    • @mmodnao
      @mmodnao Год назад +1

      “Found enough to eat today?”
      “You married into it?”

  • @murrayp4
    @murrayp4 3 года назад +6

    This is borderline experimental.

  • @bradlawson4315
    @bradlawson4315 3 года назад +2

    Dude looks like Mathew Mcconoughey at his first job.

  • @heyokawalker197
    @heyokawalker197 3 года назад +4

    Someone stole her sweet roll LOL

  • @jscordoba3
    @jscordoba3 3 года назад +4

    I don't know how I got here, but this is killing me 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @lensleader
    @lensleader Год назад +3

    This man is on the verge of tears…

  • @TanyaKatherine
    @TanyaKatherine 10 месяцев назад +1

    This warms my soul and gives me something to live for.

  • @notmikepatton1951
    @notmikepatton1951 Год назад +1

    This must be shown to future generations…they too will like hot fudge Sunday’s

  • @deebo1314
    @deebo1314 2 года назад +1

    If you listen carefully you can hear his shackles

  • @danieltravanti7003
    @danieltravanti7003 3 года назад +1

    Someone stole my sweet roll. All right.

  • @Chino780
    @Chino780 3 года назад +3

    This poor guy. LOL.

  • @davidkosa
    @davidkosa 3 года назад +1

    "Would you like another slice, Clarice?"

  • @jeroldeddins1209
    @jeroldeddins1209 4 месяца назад

    "Can you help me find my band-aid?"
    "It was holding my fingertip on"

  • @WhetuRichmond07
    @WhetuRichmond07 3 года назад +5

    This is more intense than some of the horror movies these days...

  • @goldleaf889
    @goldleaf889 3 года назад +3

    When I need to laugh I come here 😁😆😅😂🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @SimirJohnson
    @SimirJohnson 3 года назад +1

    Skipped the video and went right to the comments

  • @John_Locke_108
    @John_Locke_108 Год назад

    It's been weeks of these spoofs in my recommends and I'm loving life. The oblivion soundtrack adds so much to this tale.

  • @lozovac
    @lozovac 2 месяца назад

    How can this video generate so much joy and laughter

  • @pwise8280
    @pwise8280 3 года назад +7

    😂😂😂 this man is legendary

  • @tonyp7528
    @tonyp7528 3 года назад +2

    Why do I feel like I'm in a Skyrim loading screen with this music!!

    • @LSVertigo974
      @LSVertigo974 3 года назад +2

      It's a song from an other Elder Scrolls game : Oblivion. The song is called Harvet Dawn

  • @JonnyCrackers
    @JonnyCrackers Год назад +1

    Memes aside, this would actually be one of the most awkward jobs ever.

  • @mattc2639
    @mattc2639 3 года назад +7

    genuinely laughed at "Ham please" beef

  • @alexawermuth1219
    @alexawermuth1219 2 года назад +1

    Omg I can't even fucken BREATHE

  • @IambiguousSegment
    @IambiguousSegment 4 года назад +11

    Quite stingy portions tbh

    • @jesuguru2394
      @jesuguru2394 3 года назад +13

      But thinner slices are more tender. You can always come back up for more!

    • @PS2Damon
      @PS2Damon 3 года назад

      @@jesuguru2394 (in 2020) UM EXCUSE ME? LET ME SPEAK TO YOUR MANAGER RIGHT NOW

  • @johnbrooks4965
    @johnbrooks4965 3 года назад +1

    He giveth and he taketh away.

  • @alodell3388
    @alodell3388 4 года назад +8

    now this is delicious

  • @tonysoprano7193
    @tonysoprano7193 Год назад

    He asks her like 3 questions and she never answers one! Lol..just smiles

  • @FuToo
    @FuToo Год назад

    I love the music in the background. Lmfao 😂

  • @Jonathan-mt9up
    @Jonathan-mt9up Год назад

    I don’t care how friendly or polite the carver is, once his knife touches the customer’s plate all I can think of is germs spreading.

  • @beaupeterson188
    @beaupeterson188 Год назад

    Don’t be stingy, Mark. We all know you cut them thinner not to preserve tenderness, but to save on cost.

  • @pipechat9206
    @pipechat9206 3 года назад +1

    Is this the focking Skyrim music????!!! 😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣 internet you win

  • @HarryHikepants
    @HarryHikepants 3 месяца назад

    Can't help but feel that this is the blot on Spielbergs landscape.

  • @woopteedeewoopteedye
    @woopteedeewoopteedye Год назад

    The little girl has jello cubes, cucumber slices and watermelon in her plate, he adds in a slice of beef....

  • @Realbreather
    @Realbreather Год назад

    Can't get enough of Country Buffet vids

  • @zakeemax
    @zakeemax 3 года назад +2

    Just when I thought Greg and Mr. Perfect were bizarre.

  • @blazedoom3617
    @blazedoom3617 Год назад

    I was wondering how Bethesda did it. This NPC is probably a DLC one to teach you the 200 level speech, finally.

  • @jamesholcombe435
    @jamesholcombe435 3 года назад +1

    Him and that girl had a moment

  • @jaylove7125
    @jaylove7125 2 года назад +2

    I'm not sure to rather laugh or cry at this..it was so sad at the end when she was denied ham..and the music..🤣😢

  • @rugbyslug
    @rugbyslug 3 года назад +2

    Here's some ham ... whup, whup -- NOPE! Takeaway!

  • @lordlemond1350
    @lordlemond1350 Год назад

    I do have some spare pork roast in my van. That’s it, further back. Almost there…
    -door closes-

  • @TheHiddenNarrative
    @TheHiddenNarrative 2 года назад +3

    This was pure art.

  • @xAJAxY
    @xAJAxY Год назад +1

    The Chick at 0:45 would definitely be vegan today.

    • @musclesforsupes
      @musclesforsupes Год назад +2

      I’d like a half inch slice of that celery please.

  • @zache1605
    @zache1605 Год назад

    That was the longest carving of meat I've ever witnessed

  • @justinrodriguez3430
    @justinrodriguez3430 2 года назад +1

    He giveth and he taketh

  • @joseluisbustosayllon9099
    @joseluisbustosayllon9099 Год назад

    And fact the food looks hideous makes it even better 🤣🤣

  • @chgonutz
    @chgonutz 2 месяца назад +2

    Gimme that!

  • @MagnarTheSwole
    @MagnarTheSwole Год назад +4

    The disappointment on their faces seeing those paper thin bologna slices 🤣

  • @jbain4750
    @jbain4750 3 года назад +18

    That beef looks dreadful

    • @alcoholya
      @alcoholya 3 года назад +1

      I bet you like half inch slices too.

    • @moonjimunji7916
      @moonjimunji7916 3 года назад

      how would you know? you can barely see it

  • @mountainbearoutdoors
    @mountainbearoutdoors 9 месяцев назад

    little girl avoiding eye contact at all costs, perception 100%

  • @awesomemom533
    @awesomemom533 Год назад

    The little girl breaks character every time

  • @PassengersMusic777
    @PassengersMusic777 Год назад

    I have a feeling I am watching something we were never meant to witness

  • @adanos3013
    @adanos3013 3 года назад +1

    That child is buggy.

  • @Liquid_Alchemy
    @Liquid_Alchemy 3 года назад

    The music on these fucking KILLS ME!

  • @hiker64
    @hiker64 3 года назад

    Song: Harvest Dawn by Jeremy Soule from Oblivion game soundtrack, Elder Scrolls IV in case anyone was wondering.

  • @Choptron27
    @Choptron27 3 года назад +1

    Man thinner slices aren’t more tender.... there’s just less to chew giving the illusion it’s more tender... thinner slices are just to save money, it’s “thin to win” is what they always say.... but even worse they are so thin they get cold by the time you get to your table and actually go dry, always insist on quarter or half inch thick...

    • @WoodyXP
      @WoodyXP 3 года назад

      Illusion 100

  • @bryangooden4298
    @bryangooden4298 Год назад

    Look, the company makes me slice this meat so thin you can read a paper through it.

  • @Senedras
    @Senedras 3 года назад

    Poor girl is still stood there expecting another slice of meat knowing she'd starve to death with that one serving..😢.Thinner slices are more tender.

  • @5r3t5n0m
    @5r3t5n0m 11 месяцев назад

    Seven phrases and bottomless pit of content possibilities

  • @brbrdeng9122
    @brbrdeng9122 Год назад

    It was the grand opening of a family owned buffet with a great turnout when the occupants immediately sniff a sudden, overpowering scent of roast beef, ham, lasagna, hot fudge sundaes and a subtle after-scent of sanitizer. The scent is too much. All go insane in the building, chanting about hot weather, recent sport events and elementary school grades. The owner is bewildered as he feels the air turning more and more awkward by the second. Turning to the main entrance, the door slowly melts into nothingness. And then it comes. Blank eyes staring but not seeing. Head covered in a spotless white toque, with the coat to match. Apron dark blue, clashing with the subtle crimson ascot around it's neck. But the most striking features it had was the sparkling glove of mail in it's left and the large blade in the right. The owner horrified but still with his wits stands firm, and demands for the apparition to disperse. Then, after what seemed like eons, the Cursed Carver spoke in a strained tone that thinner slices are more tender. With that, it dissipates and the buffet returns to normal with the staff and customers, oblivious to what just occurred. Except for the owner, who retained everything. He sits down on his desk, traumatized, and hastily writes a memo to the staff to immediately start training for carving techniques as well as getting newer equipment for sharpening. Satisfied, he power downs his computer, the reflection of the black screen suddenly shows the Cursed Carver looking over his shoulder. The owner turns in a fright, but sees nothing. Looking back to the screen, words written in melted chocolate read "All right".

  • @allouttabubblegum1984
    @allouttabubblegum1984 Год назад

    I hope when this guy's friends has barbecues they Don't force him to be at the cutting station.

  • @darthsynchronic
    @darthsynchronic 3 года назад +1

    The Buffet Chef is Chris Christie

  • @jakeh7119
    @jakeh7119 3 года назад +5

    Is it still hot out there?