Dream SMP: The Red Festival

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  • Опубликовано: 2 фев 2025

Комментарии • 30 тыс.

  • @Technoblade
    @Technoblade  4 года назад +114503

    it stays in the pit

  • @cowardlynoodle8107
    @cowardlynoodle8107 4 года назад +2946

    "The only universal language is violence"
    "Might've just committed tax fraud"
    "Oh, and the murders"
    "Those rockets cost $10,000"
    "All the cool kids talk about state secrets"
    "You have to understand, I was under mild peer pressure"
    "The firework weapons test was a HUGE success"
    "I'll continue stockpiling weapons"

    • @lazicepie7800
      @lazicepie7800 4 года назад +98

      Deserves to go in the museum of
      -‘Technoblade quotes’-
      Edit: ‘Sun Tzu Quotes’

    • @Monker83
      @Monker83 4 года назад +22

      @@lazicepie7800 you mean sun tzu quotes?

    • @c.y.922
      @c.y.922 4 года назад +7

      Good quotes

    • @AintNoJohn
      @AintNoJohn 4 года назад +9

      -Sun Tzu, The Art of War

    • @cloakdagger4711
      @cloakdagger4711 4 года назад +26

      This sounds like Technoblade stole some government technology improve it. Then spent it murdering people then realized the fireworks costed way too much and committed tax fraud due to that.

  • @hermioneclearwater2765
    @hermioneclearwater2765 4 года назад +3260

    "Any critical, national weaknesses we want to talk about?"
    *Dead silence*
    "For fun?"

    • @jepiene
      @jepiene 4 года назад +92

      Whoo state secrets

    • @sindly8729
      @sindly8729 4 года назад +33

      Whoo,party

    • @kousei9661
      @kousei9661 4 года назад +30

      FIREWORKS WHOO

    • @Wobbmin
      @Wobbmin 4 года назад +52

      "Be extremely subtle, even to the point of formlessness." - Sun Tzu, The Art of War

    • @hayhay4357
      @hayhay4357 4 года назад +5

      I wanna like but it's at 666 so oh well

  • @fidget0227
    @fidget0227 4 года назад +3208

    Schlatt: “Everybody cheer Democracy!”
    Techno, an anti-democracy anarchist: “...woo”

    • @aaronshan51
      @aaronshan51 4 года назад +63

      By definition anarchists are usually pro-democracy (there are variants that are against democracy but they have different names, etc...)

    • @abc6568
      @abc6568 4 года назад +55

      @@aaronshan51 I thought pure anarchists are against any form of government

    • @ItsNullAndVoid
      @ItsNullAndVoid 4 года назад +24

      @wsufhe gisuhs Democracy itself is a system of government. If it wasn't, by definition, there wouldn't be any established rules a.k.a social order, so democracy couldn't exist or at least wouldn't work. Anarchism proposes very little government power, not no government at all.

    • @aa01blue38
      @aa01blue38 4 года назад +12

      He's the 2b2t kind of anarchist, except PG

    • @abc6568
      @abc6568 4 года назад +2

      @wsufhe gisuhs true, too bad democracy often isnt quite that simple

  • @DrGears
    @DrGears Год назад +1065

    Techno: "I was peer pressured"
    Tommy: *upset at Techno for killing Tubbo*
    Tubbo: *fully understanding of Techno's reasoning*
    Wilbur: *wanting violence and blood for content*

    • @HannahGlover-nj5sz
      @HannahGlover-nj5sz Год назад +4

      He got excellent content.

    • @yuncpr
      @yuncpr 9 месяцев назад +4

      ​@@HannahGlover-nj5sz definitely 💀

    • @loah_1
      @loah_1 9 месяцев назад +9

      @@yuncpr aged like milk

    • @Realname-k1p
      @Realname-k1p 6 месяцев назад +1

      @@loah_1 y bro because of drama

  • @MrCaretucker
    @MrCaretucker 4 года назад +4047

    Everyone’s going to remember this as “Techno’s festival of colors.”

    • @lukiia9854
      @lukiia9854 4 года назад +38

      Sounds so much better, that’s what I’m calling the festival now, that’s what’s going down in the history books

    • @elil7945
      @elil7945 4 года назад +25

      The violence was certainly colorful

    • @ohitsrusher842
      @ohitsrusher842 4 года назад +22

      Most of the colors were very red

    • @mangoes.
      @mangoes. 4 года назад +3

      That sounds like a lovely colorful and peaceful name.. it’s perfect.. ish

    • @clam6254
      @clam6254 4 года назад +8

      i prefer the red festival, sounds more vicious

  • @Wifies
    @Wifies 4 года назад +36935

    You know you've messed up when the person you're drowning begins to drink water

    • @N8Toons
      @N8Toons 4 года назад +436

      You’re everywhere

    • @sahilpojee
      @sahilpojee 4 года назад +178

      wifies i love your videos

    • @Silver-lu1dt
      @Silver-lu1dt 4 года назад +110

      You like every minecraft youtuber I like

    • @mr.clockwork
      @mr.clockwork 4 года назад +53

      Anarchy Anarchy Anarchy

    • @444.jasminne
      @444.jasminne 4 года назад +47

      @@N8Toons
      you’re* sorry i had to

  • @Sans-rt8os
    @Sans-rt8os Год назад +501

    i love how it goes from " nothing good happens to traitors" to " good things dont happen to heroes"

  • @Mistyf1
    @Mistyf1 4 года назад +851

    “Who is that technologyblade guy who keeps quoting me.”
    -Sun Tzu

    • @die8208
      @die8208 4 года назад +12

      Says a lot about our society 😔✊🏽

    • @silliebilliespider
      @silliebilliespider 4 года назад +15

      technoblade -> technologysword -> inventionscimitar

  • @secretlyditto7716
    @secretlyditto7716 4 года назад +3772

    Schlatt: “Everyone say Democracy!!”
    Techno: “Woo. Ahh. Yeah...”

    • @PS-vr1uv
      @PS-vr1uv 4 года назад +30

      @@gusphobicc no, he heard *blood for the blood god*

    • @salvadororellana571
      @salvadororellana571 4 года назад +5

      Can you please tell me the first dream smp vid by technoblade cuz this is definitely not the first 1

    • @secretlyditto7716
      @secretlyditto7716 4 года назад +9

      @@salvadororellana571 i do not know, but he does have a ton of playlists! He also has a playlist of all the livestreams he’s done on the SMP and they are extensive! So there’s content! :)

    • @salvadororellana571
      @salvadororellana571 4 года назад +2

      @@secretlyditto7716 thanks

    • @imlostandneedanswers1310
      @imlostandneedanswers1310 4 года назад +1

      @@PS-vr1uv 😓😓😓

  • @TazariaGaming
    @TazariaGaming 4 года назад +1145

    When Techno is in a high stress situation he reverts to his primal instinct, which is to stab everything

    • @cranknlesdesires
      @cranknlesdesires 4 года назад +30

      The red haze descends upon his eyes and people die

    • @zuniitsu
      @zuniitsu 4 года назад +4

      That's too true

    • @nishasnyder
      @nishasnyder 4 года назад +11

      When in stress, murder is the only option

    • @_hippo1234
      @_hippo1234 4 года назад +1

      Yeeeeee violence

    • @k_jrin28
      @k_jrin28 4 года назад +1

      he gonna start stabbing shit

  • @simply_deity
    @simply_deity Год назад +206

    That rocket launcher is so unbelievably OP. Even Techno was genuinely shocked when he saw how many people he just insta-killed. Gotta love it xD

  • @thatguy5143
    @thatguy5143 4 года назад +2433

    Techno: "there were 20 dudes there they would've jumped me"
    Also Techno: *kills everyone*

    • @strategicalcelery9206
      @strategicalcelery9206 4 года назад +27

      WITH ONLY HIS BOW

    • @grace30728
      @grace30728 4 года назад +7

      How does he commit that tho?? I am so confused

    • @Alteewzx
      @Alteewzx 4 года назад +8

      @@grace30728 firework

    • @clashdash5654
      @clashdash5654 4 года назад +10

      @@grace30728 he shot the fireworks from his crossbow which deals redicoulous damage and splash

    • @simeonabreha7050
      @simeonabreha7050 4 года назад +1

      @@strategicalcelery9206 crossbow

  • @goob6095
    @goob6095 4 года назад +2578

    jschlatt: ”Take him out Techno”
    Techno: “To dinner?”

  • @legendarylily8871
    @legendarylily8871 4 года назад +4326

    techno: "there were like 20 dudes there that would've jumped me tommy"
    also techno: *turns around and massacres the entire crowd without breaking a sweat*

    • @StarryxNight5
      @StarryxNight5 4 года назад +170

      Well, to be fair, he caught them by surprise.

    • @perom551
      @perom551 4 года назад +271

      @@StarryxNight5 Also, he probably didn't know how strong the crossbow really was. You can notice he only improvises the mass murder part after noticing the damage that thing did when it accidentally hit Schlatt and Quackity

    • @coolboyfunnel9999
      @coolboyfunnel9999 4 года назад +8

      8

    • @evil-doer6211
      @evil-doer6211 4 года назад +15

      @@Vindextra bro don’t remind me of the channel 😭😭

    • @mishlimon98
      @mishlimon98 4 года назад +18

      the element of surprise and shock
      if he just killed the president with an axe the shock wouldn't be as much like he killed tubbo and the president with rocket

  • @daryncollins7640
    @daryncollins7640 2 года назад +289

    "i had to take a break from drowning to drink a glass of water" this is the reason why we loved you as a content creator rest in peace

  • @gravity9921
    @gravity9921 4 года назад +2083

    Somehow technoblade is calm, patient, sarcastic, and a bully all at once.

    • @ddybo123
      @ddybo123 4 года назад +14

      youre not wrong

    • @radit6288
      @radit6288 4 года назад +7

      because he have adhd

    • @australium7374
      @australium7374 4 года назад +3

      Because he was tasked with espionage

    • @i2t290
      @i2t290 3 года назад

      lol

    • @randomperson1844
      @randomperson1844 3 года назад +3

      It could be that... he is a sadist

  • @MitoraNameisTaken
    @MitoraNameisTaken 4 года назад +1639

    Techno’s existence itself is a flex. He obliterated everyone as colorful as possible.

    • @StarryxNight5
      @StarryxNight5 4 года назад +22

      He made sure to get the manburg colours for the rockets so he could flex on them. It was expensive but worth it.

    • @SecretPsithurism
      @SecretPsithurism 4 года назад

      where can i watch dream smp

    • @Hoponthedresserrr
      @Hoponthedresserrr 4 года назад

      *I can agree.*

    • @adventurepie4150
      @adventurepie4150 4 года назад +7

      @@SecretPsithurism Unfortunately, to be updated on Dream SMP, you gotta get yourself update through the streams of everyone in Dream SMP (on Twitch). Some of them stream everyday and probs better to be updated through the YT summary channels. But if there’s only one streamer that will give you full context of what’s happening, its Tommyinnit. :)

    • @InZaynReality
      @InZaynReality 4 года назад +1

      @@SecretPsithurism you can look on the playlists for the streams

  • @captainkill5983
    @captainkill5983 Год назад +276

    18:31 “there were like 20 dudes they would have shot me where I stood” Techno: *shoots 20 dudes with firework crossbow*

    • @JoshBeck-z5m
      @JoshBeck-z5m 7 месяцев назад +3

      He had the jump, had it been the other way around it might not have gone well

  • @mzulm
    @mzulm 4 года назад +3073

    i love how techno says very random things
    "yeah violence!"
    "WOOO STATE SECRETS"

    • @jasherr3740
      @jasherr3740 4 года назад +5

      Ikr lol

    • @mikehunt3060
      @mikehunt3060 4 года назад +4

      *I...
      Start your sentence with an uppercase letter next time.

    • @LemonAide2024
      @LemonAide2024 4 года назад +34

      @@mikehunt3060 you must be fun at parties

    • @eldritchgod4308
      @eldritchgod4308 4 года назад +14

      @@LemonAide2024 The Guy's got the Grammar-nazi insignia as his pfp, let the man-child be.

    • @perfectionist.
      @perfectionist. 4 года назад +3

      @@mikehunt3060 i am, Sorry Mr.

  • @airconditioningunit9777
    @airconditioningunit9777 4 года назад +2173

    “The thing about this world is that the only universal language, is violence”
    -hot elbow man

  • @beholdnonsense5100
    @beholdnonsense5100 4 года назад +381

    Gotta love how Techno only needs a second to realize the power his rocket launcher has to immediately go mad with bloodlust

  • @soulknight5330
    @soulknight5330 Год назад +143

    I love how well Schlatt plays the vilain role, I feel like Techno and Schlatt compliment the vibe so well even when they’re not directly interacting with each other. It’s such a joy to watch.

  • @artificialidiot1654
    @artificialidiot1654 4 года назад +4062

    Techno: *kills the whole manberg population*
    Quakity: Everyone go after tommyinnit right now!

  • @abienahl345
    @abienahl345 4 года назад +2910

    “I have a small attention span” also farmed potatoes for like 11 hours straight recently

    • @tufflamb
      @tufflamb 4 года назад +90

      But he was watching anime while farming so all is fair

    • @realbignoob1886
      @realbignoob1886 4 года назад +16

      @@tufflamb he was?

    • @tufflamb
      @tufflamb 4 года назад +33

      @@realbignoob1886 yes

    • @realbignoob1886
      @realbignoob1886 4 года назад +16

      @@tufflamb I thought he had a lot of patience

    • @tufflamb
      @tufflamb 4 года назад +85

      @@realbignoob1886 thats like the last thing he would have. he has adhd

  • @-Pakman-
    @-Pakman- 4 года назад +778

    Techboblade: “I had to take a break from drowning to drink a glass of water”
    Fundy: *MAD CONFUSED NOISES*

    • @tigo9328
      @tigo9328 4 года назад

      Be Honest who else is a FAN 😇😇😇😇😇😇😇😇😇
      “ɪ’ᴍ sᴜʙʙɪɴ𝙶 ᴛᴏ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏⓄɴᴇ ᴡʜᴏ sᴜʙ𝘴​ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴇ”👀😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊

    • @gamerhatch9072
      @gamerhatch9072 4 года назад +3

      tigo .__. Stop it bot

    • @bagel4620
      @bagel4620 4 года назад +2

      tigo .__. I’m not a fan
      I’m a lamp

    • @lukefrank8047
      @lukefrank8047 17 дней назад

      remember...

  • @sockswithsamdals
    @sockswithsamdals 2 года назад +740

    hearing nihachu go "he's still so young" while he drowns hurts a lot now

  • @Wowsette
    @Wowsette 4 года назад +9587

    jschlatt: “Take him out.”
    technoblade: “take him out to dinner?”

    • @backspas6485
      @backspas6485 4 года назад +35

      69th like

    • @stuff5757
      @stuff5757 4 года назад +273

      Both options are illegal, since Tubbo is a minor

    • @waffle3879
      @waffle3879 4 года назад +74

      What a romantic gentleman 😏

    • @deceasedbeing9540
      @deceasedbeing9540 4 года назад +7

      lol

    • @dannyn6036
      @dannyn6036 4 года назад +184

      @@stuff5757 what’s wrong with taking a minor out for dinner? My chill uncle’s friend take me and my brothers out for food all the time

  • @jiehe3630
    @jiehe3630 4 года назад +3082

    He’s started another SMP series to distract squid kid while he farms 1billion potatoes

    • @TopHatsGuy
      @TopHatsGuy 4 года назад +167

      Potato war 4? The grand finale

    • @CreamyCow
      @CreamyCow 4 года назад +128

      @@TopHatsGuy and then grand finale rematch

    • @cdragon7583
      @cdragon7583 4 года назад +47

      @@CreamyCow there is not actual grand finale.... it goes on forever

    • @pedropereira6888
      @pedropereira6888 4 года назад +66

      I mean his island is still private and squid kid's island is private too again after being public when the war ended. And aparently Techno still farms potatos by hand so he might be silently going for a 1 billion of a certain resource

    • @Error-zg4po
      @Error-zg4po 4 года назад +34

      I really hope Techno is NOT doing a potato war part 4 for his mental sake and tbh I really want a variety in content

  • @thatteen2173
    @thatteen2173 4 года назад +5557

    “Democratically elected leadership? NOT ON MY WATCH!”
    “Sir this is a taco bell”

  • @ynedd
    @ynedd 2 года назад +53

    16:25
    Techno: "Wilbur, you wanted to blow up Manberg."
    Wilbur: "Oh yeah, yeah, it's all in the past man, IT'S ALL IN THE FUTURE"
    The bastard hinted at it! He friggin hinted at it! We all just ignored it!!!

  • @codyjake6284
    @codyjake6284 4 года назад +641

    I Like how techno when he’s explain that he can only fly in the rain, it sounds like a crappy superpower

    • @casuals.3.19
      @casuals.3.19 4 года назад +57

      If he had these powers irl they would be useless because he lives in California

    • @directioner4859
      @directioner4859 4 года назад +7

      @@casuals.3.19 yep

    • @Apollowram
      @Apollowram 4 года назад +14

      Sorta like catch the rainbow from steel ball run

    • @sgosstheboss
      @sgosstheboss 4 года назад +3

      Cody Jake yea I would hate to have that power cause rain is my least favorite weather and I live in an area where it seems every time it rains, it's either really cold out or it's summer.

    • @eascide
      @eascide 4 года назад

      @@Apollowram yeah thats why i was thinkin of

  • @joshuahilde1890
    @joshuahilde1890 4 года назад +558

    "any critical, national weaknesses you wanna talk about, for fun!" - Technoblade the undercover spy
    "uhhhhhhh, what?" - dictator jschlatt
    "woohoo state secrets"
    this was my favorite part.

  • @MusicLover96954
    @MusicLover96954 4 года назад +2927

    Technoblade’s actual personality is his own character lmao and it fits perfectly

    • @Hit_by_a_Parked_Car
      @Hit_by_a_Parked_Car 4 года назад +19

      self insert

    • @Professor_Brie
      @Professor_Brie 4 года назад +79

      They’re not pretending to be characters they’re not on the SMP, they’re only exaggerating and making things more dramatic in a very extended bit, in a way, so it would make sense that they’d act like themselves, since there isn’t actually a specific character they’re trying to play other than a more entertaining version of themselves. So pretty much, everyone’s “character” is themselves. 👍

    • @RaelagDidEverythingRight
      @RaelagDidEverythingRight 4 года назад +5

      They are pretending they are themselves

    • @okayum
      @okayum 4 года назад +17

      @@Professor_Brie THIS. This is exactly why every single person using the excuse of "personas" to do whatever they want in art or fanfiction is complete bullcrap and I'm tired of it. That excuse was, is, and always will be invalid.

    • @okayum
      @okayum 4 года назад

      EDIT: misunderstood

  • @wittesteve6969
    @wittesteve6969 2 года назад +28

    *goverment members talk about litterally anything*
    Technoblade: 'State secrets wooo'

  • @westonpaschane8995
    @westonpaschane8995 4 года назад +897

    Techno: actually uploads
    His fans: I’ve seen this on so many channels a couple weeks ago but I’ll still watch it.

    • @impossible9690
      @impossible9690 4 года назад +9

      😂😂 tru

    • @pzb1017
      @pzb1017 4 года назад +45

      I saw this first in Techno’s stream.

    • @kartauf_l8844
      @kartauf_l8844 4 года назад +32

      @@impossible9690 But here it has been edited by an english major

    • @nrangaswamy5618
      @nrangaswamy5618 4 года назад

      Yes

    • @aidenlee6877
      @aidenlee6877 4 года назад

      Most relatable comment lmfao

  • @plun1331
    @plun1331 4 года назад +1672

    techno: assasinates half the nation
    shlatt: GET TOMMYINNIT

    • @blazeyude9999
      @blazeyude9999 4 года назад +68

      The whole nation, actually

    • @Meme-pg5tw
      @Meme-pg5tw 4 года назад +36

      That was quackity

    • @blurp9054
      @blurp9054 4 года назад +7

      I mean shlatt have a condition

    • @aj-ug9hh
      @aj-ug9hh 4 года назад +41

      can't really blame him though. techno has trident and techno is techno

    • @2weaky_702
      @2weaky_702 4 года назад +31

      Thats because technoblade never dies.

  • @strangedogthatisslightlyan7860
    @strangedogthatisslightlyan7860 4 года назад +525

    "When drowning, drink a glass of water."
    - Sun Tzu, The Art of War

  • @thelastprime4978
    @thelastprime4978 2 года назад +113

    Oh my god this video legit has probably one of the best intros on RUclips
    If Techno knew how to do anything it was how to make one hell of an entrance
    Rest In Peace Blood god no one could ever do it like you

    • @mehmeddoruk3
      @mehmeddoruk3 Год назад

      can you not ruin the mood and remind everyone that hes dead

    • @hiii345
      @hiii345 Год назад

      @@mehmeddoruk3boy shut up it’s called respecting a legend and you are on every single comment that says rip nobody is in mood right now everyone here is sad

    • @cierrahubers
      @cierrahubers 8 месяцев назад +1

      @@mehmeddoruk3bruh not saying it doesnt mean that he’s not dead

  • @theoryofawesome_
    @theoryofawesome_ 4 года назад +1436

    I like how he edited out missing the first trident shot

  • @yataimii9514
    @yataimii9514 4 года назад +621

    You can hear the happiness in techno's voice when he killed a massive amount of people with his crossbow promoting his channel

  • @AceOfHearts95
    @AceOfHearts95 4 года назад +1779

    "He murdered you in front of a crowd"
    He also murdered the crowd

  • @Dark-Blue-Diamond
    @Dark-Blue-Diamond 8 месяцев назад +206

    I’m rewatching all of his videos ❤️

  • @thecow5397
    @thecow5397 4 года назад +1144

    Techno: "There was like 20 guys!"
    Also Techno: *Kills entire server in less than 20 seconds.*

    • @agintofchoas7014
      @agintofchoas7014 4 года назад +18

      The people he kills arent wearing any armor, the ones who had on armor ran up to the podium or ran away

    • @tryingtoreachyouaboutyourc6161
      @tryingtoreachyouaboutyourc6161 4 года назад +1

      That's a death per second ratio of 1!

    • @agintofchoas7014
      @agintofchoas7014 4 года назад +15

      @@tryingtoreachyouaboutyourc6161 *me bout to pull ip the footage, count the actual amount and reply the actual ratio*
      0.4 kills a second or 4 kills every ten seconds

    • @Murknium
      @Murknium 4 года назад

      hold up, that is a very specific calculation

    • @epic5688
      @epic5688 4 года назад +3

      @@agintofchoas7014 u wasted your time calculating that....
      Pog THATS POG I LIKE IT

  • @Maaaaiii.
    @Maaaaiii. 4 года назад +585

    What this video has shown me:
    - People can drink water while drowning
    - Peer pressure can kill
    - fireworks + crossbow = most OP weapon
    - violence is the universal language

    • @NoNo-jy8jm
      @NoNo-jy8jm 4 года назад +1

      Yes

    • @Rhyton
      @Rhyton 4 года назад +3

      The firework + crossbow shock me ngl

    • @finjaquetemumnomeaqui4838
      @finjaquetemumnomeaqui4838 4 года назад +3

      Fireworks + Crossbow is good against crowds because of the AOE damage.

    • @ratman-f1b
      @ratman-f1b 4 года назад +1

      i didn't even know you could do that

    • @Vardel.
      @Vardel. 4 года назад +1

      @@ratman-f1b its a mod

  • @honkytone608
    @honkytone608 4 года назад +4846

    Techno's parents: So, son, what's it like playing Minecraft with other RUclipsrs?
    Techno: Oh, it's nothing too weird. Today, I just infiltrated a public execution and turned it into a terrorist attack. It's all in good fun.

    • @parvathypattanath4249
      @parvathypattanath4249 4 года назад +51

      lol

    • @sirbilliamiii8229
      @sirbilliamiii8229 4 года назад +80

      It do be like that tho

    • @imaginee6236
      @imaginee6236 4 года назад +129

      Tommy’s parents: soo mR THomAtHy what’s like playing with other minecraft youtubers?
      Tommy: *W a r*

    • @angadgrewal9324
      @angadgrewal9324 4 года назад +41

      it would be a even more of a deadly terrorist attack if wilbur ignited the tnt to blow up the whole place

    • @edgewastaken2432
      @edgewastaken2432 4 года назад +30

      I do that on a daily basis but what's minecraft?

  • @PlasmaBoi
    @PlasmaBoi 2 года назад +355

    Man techno's humor will never get old... but Man do I miss him

  • @faithfulwarden
    @faithfulwarden 4 года назад +1922

    Everyone: is role-playing
    Technoblade: I may have just commited tax fraud recently

    • @gunter6377
      @gunter6377 4 года назад +47

      Manberg may have taxes. We don't know

    • @user-yw3ic8qc1h
      @user-yw3ic8qc1h 4 года назад +65

      Technoblade :
      power : 10
      defence : 10
      charisma : 7
      dedication : 10
      intelligence : 10
      role play : 2

    • @rossadinho7349
      @rossadinho7349 3 года назад +5

      @@gunter6377 they do, because Schlatt raised Niki’s taxes when Tommy asked for a visa for Ninja’s visit

    • @HiroForgetsStuff
      @HiroForgetsStuff 3 года назад

      Yep this makes sense than humanity

    • @karalyna2004
      @karalyna2004 3 года назад +2

      Technofraud

  • @tracks6984
    @tracks6984 4 года назад +906

    Techno: [ goes through the entire history of the server in three seconds ]
    People who haven’t watched the streams: 𝙤𝙝 𝙤𝙠𝙖𝙮

    • @PersonManManManMan
      @PersonManManManMan 4 года назад +11

      also Tommy and others have made multiple videos every 4 or so days

    • @AliG_
      @AliG_ 4 года назад

      Lol

    • @bonk2987
      @bonk2987 4 года назад

      Oh okay

    • @nov4ni
      @nov4ni 4 года назад +5

      I’ve don’t have twitch and so I get everything from animations-

    • @xradar8349
      @xradar8349 4 года назад

      where can i watch the streams?

  • @plaguechan732
    @plaguechan732 4 года назад +707

    "woo! Antly..
    Any critical national weaknesses we wanna talk about? For fun?"
    *Smooth as sandpaper*

    • @plaguechan732
      @plaguechan732 4 года назад +27

      AND HIS SWORD IS NAMED ORPHAN ABLITERATOR IM DEAD

  • @AsifKhan-ie6tm
    @AsifKhan-ie6tm 2 года назад +17

    I TOLD YOU TECHNO NEVER DIES TRY YOUR HARDEST FUNDY BUT YOU NEED TO TRAIN ANOTHER 500 YEARS

  • @h.p.wallnut9912
    @h.p.wallnut9912 4 года назад +915

    Schlatt: “Techno, kill Tubbo”
    Techno: “Genocide it is then!”

    • @jamebeckhusen9030
      @jamebeckhusen9030 4 года назад +29

      “Its mass murder then”

    • @jaxonfreeze7882
      @jaxonfreeze7882 4 года назад +10

      @@fabrir8512 *read the comment above you before replying

    • @sprtanboy8069
      @sprtanboy8069 4 года назад +9

      @@fabrir8512 look like we have a bruh moment

    • @Dappersworth
      @Dappersworth 4 года назад +4

      Genocide:
      "The systematic and widespread extermination or attempted extermination of a national, racial, religious, or ethnic group."

    • @Akira-cd2qs
      @Akira-cd2qs 4 года назад +3

      I mean, if you have already kill someone then why don't kill everyone

  • @samueljuhasz7218
    @samueljuhasz7218 4 года назад +434

    Everyone: "OMG Tubbo died nooo ;-;"
    Techno: "Lmao look at that killstreak"

    • @stuun-two-re3571
      @stuun-two-re3571 4 года назад

      POSITIVE KD!!

    • @ThunderhunterFTW
      @ThunderhunterFTW 4 года назад

      I imagine Technoblades killstreak is much longer than one man could realistically count... never dying and all.

    • @hussienhaydersaleh7634
      @hussienhaydersaleh7634 4 года назад

      LAUGH MY ASS OUT LMAO LOL

    • @mayra9090
      @mayra9090 4 года назад

      8 player killstreak

    • @mineland8220
      @mineland8220 4 года назад

      Some *p h a t* killstreak right there

  • @xav6487
    @xav6487 4 года назад +4287

    “I had to take a break from drowning to drink a glass of water.”
    -Technoblade, 2020.

  • @kenneth-Alli
    @kenneth-Alli 20 дней назад +8

    Everytime i feel bad, either for another drama of the smp, or because i simply feel bad, i come here. i like to forget everything and act as if i was still in 2021, when everything was ok, where everyone was happy, and when i could just sit down and watch technoblade stream

  • @giliaquek5339
    @giliaquek5339 4 года назад +2522

    jschlatt: “democracy on three. one, two, three!!”
    everyone else: “democracy!!!”
    techno: “ooooolalalahdjdbdyeahhhh”

  • @shet7574
    @shet7574 4 года назад +3107

    It’s kinda funny that techno literally assassinated the president of the enemy country and his own team is “mad” at him

    • @FlufferPuffle
      @FlufferPuffle 4 года назад +128

      All because of one friendly fire casualty

    • @zedincognitoboi1435
      @zedincognitoboi1435 4 года назад +91

      Ikr he killed a powerful enemy leader and another member of the enemy side but just because he killed tubbo Tommy’s mad at him

    • @kese6757
      @kese6757 4 года назад +13

      It makes no sense Techno is right they used him all he needed was one person he could trust and it would’ve worked out in his favor

    • @PosiDoesMore
      @PosiDoesMore 4 года назад +43

      I hate to be that guy, but Techno was intending on just killing Tubbo, because of peer pressure. He killed Schlatt and Quackity completely by accident, then decided "screw it" and blew up the whole crowd in the meantime. So technically, although Techno did kill the enemy, he wasn't even trying to. His intended target was an ally. Also it was really just Tommy who got mad because Tubbo is like a brother to him. He got over it pretty fast too.

    • @gradyamick4126
      @gradyamick4126 4 года назад +5

      Its roleplay. Also I think Wilbur writes the scripts.

  • @seungjaelee6100
    @seungjaelee6100 4 года назад +610

    "if you want to know the enemy. . .
    ask for state secrets"
    -Sun Tzu, Art of War

  • @doodleee3
    @doodleee3 2 года назад +25

    no one:
    techno while drowning:im kinda thirsty im gonna drink a glass of water

  • @rdlihnnugneaj7711
    @rdlihnnugneaj7711 4 года назад +669

    Tommy: TECHNO YOU--
    Techno: P I T.

    • @qaurito8081
      @qaurito8081 4 года назад +13

      Anything Tommy says should just be responded with, "PIT"

    • @Pearlbytezz
      @Pearlbytezz 4 года назад

      Yes

    • @duceysanem
      @duceysanem 4 года назад

      @@qaurito8081 I think you mean *it stays in the pit*

  • @shakazar1815
    @shakazar1815 4 года назад +5702

    Are we going to ignore the fact techno just filmed himself beating a fox to death while on drugs?

    • @droopsmoop
      @droopsmoop 4 года назад +495

      So you were worried about that and not him committing a literal massacre

    • @shakazar1815
      @shakazar1815 4 года назад +194

      @@droopsmoopshhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

    • @deadprank947
      @deadprank947 4 года назад +26

      @@kittycat-sc7je shut up

    • @Yo-en8fc
      @Yo-en8fc 4 года назад +40

      Eh. Sounds normal

    • @duceysanem
      @duceysanem 4 года назад +18

      @@Yo-en8fc yeah idk what there talking about

  • @josewrldd
    @josewrldd 4 года назад +472

    jschlatt: "can we get a democracy on 3!"
    Techno in the most monotone voice:
    "woooooo, raahhhh."

  • @Anordinaryweirdie
    @Anordinaryweirdie Год назад +31

    Techno: hold on I left the stove on at home.
    Fundy: NOOOOOOO

  • @kingbingus9825
    @kingbingus9825 4 года назад +3138

    tommy: WHATS WRONG WITH YOU
    technoblade: "I have a bad attention span, I'm bad at conversations, dont really deal with social conversations well, I might have just committed tax fraud,"
    tommy: YOU KILLED TUBBO
    technoblade: oh yeah. I forgot about the murders

  • @chunky8684
    @chunky8684 4 года назад +1324

    Techno: uploads the festival
    Everyone: hey I've seen this one!
    Techno: what do you mean you've seen it its brand new

    • @Megiddo501
      @Megiddo501 4 года назад +6

      lmao

    • @theuniversedeer5096
      @theuniversedeer5096 4 года назад +12

      Wdym? This is litteraly brand new :v

    • @KushagraPratap
      @KushagraPratap 4 года назад

      @@theuniversedeer5096 I watched it way earlier on fundy's channel

    • @emmawoudul4917
      @emmawoudul4917 4 года назад

      @@theuniversedeer5096 it's also on Tommy's channel

    • @ilhandaanish2381
      @ilhandaanish2381 4 года назад +11

      Technically there’s the vods that you can watch

  • @apacheattackhelicopter5823
    @apacheattackhelicopter5823 4 года назад +1933

    “Tommy the thing is, your using words... But the thing about this world, Tommy. Is the only universal language is violence. And we’ve had that conversation, we’ve spoken that language, in the pit. It’s over Tommy. On to a new day, a new plot. To destroy Manburg. [cue evil laughter]”

    • @anai.7889
      @anai.7889 4 года назад +4

      What stream is that in?

    • @tomsektul31
      @tomsektul31 4 года назад +27

      @@anai.7889 The Festival

    • @anai.7889
      @anai.7889 4 года назад +2

      @@tomsektul31 i just got to that part lol sorry

    • @SagemaGrindset1894
      @SagemaGrindset1894 4 года назад +56

      And to think that techno stated that he's not the roleplaying type of guy and he just put out such an iconic speech lmao

    • @techyesgun7991
      @techyesgun7991 4 года назад +13

      It stays in the pit

  • @barsukascool
    @barsukascool Месяц назад +4

    5:11 “any critical national weaknesses that we wanna talk about for fun? Woo state secrets! Confidential info!”😂

    • @codexstudios
      @codexstudios Месяц назад +1

      Still solid gold content, to this day. What a legend, man

  • @s4en
    @s4en 4 года назад +628

    “Techno it’s been 15 years your subscribers need you techno” - Sun Tzu, The Art of War

    • @ratio6677
      @ratio6677 4 года назад +5

      Never has a truer statement ever been uttered...

    • @ampere7220
      @ampere7220 4 года назад +2

      i smell like wet metal

    • @speciality6264
      @speciality6264 4 года назад +2

      OH MY GOD SO INSPIRING 😮😮😮😮

    • @brahm739
      @brahm739 4 года назад

      *27

  • @ghazihatk340
    @ghazihatk340 4 года назад +315

    Techno: "THERE WAS 20 PEOPLE WHO WOULD'VE JUMPED ME"
    Also Techno: *Kills most of them by Crossbow fireworks*

  • @meep3491
    @meep3491 4 года назад +1237

    Techno is like the guy that stumbled across a stage and just played along not knowing the script.

    • @rowanthistle4128
      @rowanthistle4128 4 года назад +83

      That’s an actual style! It’s called “thank god you’re here”, I practiced it in drama class for a while!

    • @totmgsrockxd9900
      @totmgsrockxd9900 4 года назад +26

      And then he twists the plot to make it a thousand times better.

    • @nevergonnaupload
      @nevergonnaupload 4 года назад +3

      That is honestly what me and a group of my friends do at lunchtimes

    • @nikoaugustine5415
      @nikoaugustine5415 4 года назад +4

      And then he makes it so much better

    • @mini9235
      @mini9235 4 года назад +2

      im like half certain thats exactly whats happening

  • @multiverseofmadness593
    @multiverseofmadness593 Год назад +8

    technoblade:i will go even when im not invited
    also him:why am i here?

  • @andrejjovic3267
    @andrejjovic3267 4 года назад +482

    Technoblade:*post a video about festival*
    His fans:Wait I've seen that one before.
    Technoblade:What do you mean, it's brand new.

    • @knarli8408
      @knarli8408 4 года назад +23

      And we will still watch it 20 times

    • @animeyoyoqueen
      @animeyoyoqueen 4 года назад +4

      @@knarli8408TRUEEEE

    • @oasis613
      @oasis613 4 года назад +5

      His fans: We've re-watched your streams 1,000 times in waiting for your next upload.

    • @clara4738
      @clara4738 4 года назад +1

      it's just because it's technoblade, his videos has nicotine in it

  • @masonjar5012
    @masonjar5012 4 года назад +1284

    Tommy: "YOU KILLED TUBBO!"
    Me: "To be fair, he killed the president and every citizen of Manberg as well."

  • @dropnight4171
    @dropnight4171 4 года назад +384

    techno: *casually kills everyone in the nation*
    tubbo: "versus an entire 'nation of people who are much more powerful than you'"

  • @noodlesxd1795
    @noodlesxd1795 Год назад +15

    I love how he added humour into serious law, yall are just a big minecraft friendgroup

  • @kimConrad4643
    @kimConrad4643 4 года назад +2095

    “The only universal language is violence, and we had that conversation”
    Holy shit lmao

    • @strawberrycow6614
      @strawberrycow6614 4 года назад +10

      Timestamp?

    • @jared5803
      @jared5803 4 года назад +19

      @@strawberrycow6614 19:55 a few seconds after that time stamp

    • @floydy8359
      @floydy8359 4 года назад +4

      Violence? My favourite music genre.

    • @goofyb1362
      @goofyb1362 4 года назад +4

      My friends used all my iron my gold my wood and my stone to make 6 large chests of hoes what should I do to them? Should I stop being their friends?

    • @jacobygames
      @jacobygames 4 года назад +3

      @@goofyb1362 get insane loot in secret and demolish them

  • @lcgdabmaster6797
    @lcgdabmaster6797 4 года назад +1447

    “Hey, If Ur Gonna Die, Why Not Kill Everyone Else First?”
    -Sun Tzu, The Art Of War

    • @stuun-two-re3571
      @stuun-two-re3571 4 года назад +24

      Sun Tzu, The Art Of Terrorism

    • @lcgdabmaster6797
      @lcgdabmaster6797 4 года назад +17

      @@stuun-two-re3571 Sunsama Tzu Laden

    • @ascendingmofo2943
      @ascendingmofo2943 4 года назад +8

      @@lcgdabmaster6797 I like those words

    • @lusca999
      @lusca999 4 года назад +6

      @@lcgdabmaster6797 Sun Tzu, Art of BOOM

    • @hokachi6401
      @hokachi6401 4 года назад

      @@lcgdabmaster6797 I like those words too

  • @Chokolat_raisins
    @Chokolat_raisins 4 года назад +1568

    Techno: Kills everyone with colorful rockets, including the president
    Tommy: I'm gonna pretend I didn't see that

    • @bfx2515
      @bfx2515 4 года назад +10

      Tommy is blind

    • @Eontrix
      @Eontrix 4 года назад +9

      He also killed tubbo, if he were just going to kill everyone anyways then why kill tubbo? Tommy’s not being dumb

    • @naturegame8624
      @naturegame8624 4 года назад +25

      He only cared that Tubbo was shot. Tubbo is his best friend and the only one he knows isn't on anyone else's side.

    • @copyshark2093
      @copyshark2093 4 года назад +1

      Attacks techno blindly for making the right choice

    • @gremlinfifty2308
      @gremlinfifty2308 4 года назад +5

      BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD

  • @ArchPlaysGamessz
    @ArchPlaysGamessz Год назад +10

    R.I.P Technoblade 1999-2022 You will be missed and will never be forgotten in our hearts
    o7

  • @addict3
    @addict3 4 года назад +1291

    "In the midst of chaos, there is also opportunity."
    -Sun Tzu, The art of war

    • @meenahh
      @meenahh 4 года назад +19

      actual sun tzu quote

    • @keany4388
      @keany4388 4 года назад +10

      Quickness is the essence of the war.
      Sun Tzu

    • @universalpotato9503
      @universalpotato9503 4 года назад +7

      This means a lot more after seeing the latest stream

    • @olivia-nr1tz
      @olivia-nr1tz 4 года назад +2

      @@universalpotato9503 that was insane

    • @universalpotato9503
      @universalpotato9503 4 года назад +9

      @@olivia-nr1tz yeah love how techno after is just chill with them but if he heard the word government he just pulls out tnt omg he said early in the stream he could be a sleeper agent activated by a word that word is government

  • @ranitsarkar2684
    @ranitsarkar2684 4 года назад +544

    When techno killed jschlatt while trying to kill tubbo -
    *plot.exe has stopped working*

    • @eui33k28
      @eui33k28 4 года назад +6

      Plot armor wasn't strong enough

    • @pirs9383
      @pirs9383 4 года назад

      I was thinking that

  • @batcrit
    @batcrit 4 года назад +3748

    Technoblade: You can’t take blame for killing everyone at the festival if there’s no one alive to blame you

  • @YN4TYT
    @YN4TYT 2 года назад +128

    TECHNOBLADE NEVER DIES!
    R.I.P technoblade/Alex 1999-2022

    • @luke_0055
      @luke_0055 2 года назад +2

      Bro I wished he didn’t die this man’s content was so good
      rest in peace Technoblade it wasn’t your time 😢

    • @mehmeddoruk3
      @mehmeddoruk3 Год назад

      can you not ruin the mood and remind everyone that hes dead

    • @_SunTzu
      @_SunTzu 11 месяцев назад

      2022? god damn

    • @cierrahubers
      @cierrahubers 8 месяцев назад +1

      @@mehmeddoruk3bro r u srsly just gonna comment this under every single comment that said this

  • @user-jx8jk8ct1c
    @user-jx8jk8ct1c 4 года назад +1021

    Techno: *kills Tubbo*
    Tommy: What's wrong with you?
    Techno: A lot of things really. I have a bad attention span, bad at conversation, don't really deal with social conversations well, might have just commited tax fraud recently..
    oh and the murders

  • @snoape5522
    @snoape5522 4 года назад +355

    Jschlatt: “Now that we got Tubbo in a tub-box.”
    That is probably the best thing that was said.

    • @ginger333
      @ginger333 4 года назад +4

      He said that as a reference to when Tommy calls tubbo tubbox as a nickname

    • @xkryde
      @xkryde 4 года назад

      *Lol*

    • @Matuterocks
      @Matuterocks 4 года назад

      He was probably looking for an opportunity to use that line.

  • @shelbyteague7928
    @shelbyteague7928 4 года назад +532

    “This is a reconnaissance mission”
    **casually assassinates, an ally, the president, the vice president, and just about every citizen of the nation**

  • @superdino4863
    @superdino4863 2 месяца назад +5

    8:31 the death message after fundy was jumping around is so funny to me😭😭

  • @Emerald29
    @Emerald29 4 года назад +680

    "If a furry tries to drown you with your respiration 3 helmet. Drink water to assert dominance"
    *-Sun Tzu*
    *The Art Of War*

  • @soupyloup3963
    @soupyloup3963 4 года назад +206

    "Imagine being some famous general and writer that guided hundreds of people both in battle and in life. Then thousands of years later, get quoted by a bunch of people playing minecraft."
    -Sun Tzu, Art of War

  • @cark_irl
    @cark_irl 4 года назад +12018

    "it stays in the pit"
    -Sun Tzu, The Art of War

  • @RnadomStuff
    @RnadomStuff 2 года назад +66

    13:49 I love the genuine laugh after he sees how many people he killed I miss techno 😢

  • @justafranz
    @justafranz 4 года назад +409

    everyone: oh my god this is terrible techno just massacred the audience and our leaders
    techno: i cant wait for that clout i just plugged myself in 20 different channels

  • @ivanturgenev8452
    @ivanturgenev8452 4 года назад +742

    Techno: literally kills everyone
    Quackity: GET TOMMY

    • @irvinglagunas5649
      @irvinglagunas5649 4 года назад +11

      The few that remained wanted to survive

    • @Wobbmin
      @Wobbmin 4 года назад +7

      They knew they couldn't get Techno even if they all charged at once. They went for the next best thing.

  • @rustyshade2971
    @rustyshade2971 4 года назад +305

    I love how when asked what's wrong with him he just starts listing everything

  • @lotgiga8
    @lotgiga8 Год назад +14

    I miss you... but now im not crying that much anymore :).
    Have good time in heven techno

  • @TheFlamingSword_
    @TheFlamingSword_ 4 года назад +3122

    I love how everyone else is seriously roleplaying while Techno is just being himself

  • @Ethan-uq2ew
    @Ethan-uq2ew 4 года назад +373

    "there were like 20 guys that jumped me"
    techno, you just killed everyone in 3 shots with a *gun*

    • @qaurito8081
      @qaurito8081 4 года назад +2

      well, you got him there

    • @pivondriy4965
      @pivondriy4965 4 года назад +1

      It's not just a gun, it's a "SUBSCRIBE TO TECHNOBLADE"
      People should know history of de Blade

    • @luizfernandes9459
      @luizfernandes9459 4 года назад +2

      He also killed 3 people in two shots
      ...Techno's a scary man

  • @Benpeli
    @Benpeli 4 года назад +437

    Fundy: Let’s go techno
    Techno: pulls out sharp 19 fist

    • @qaurito8081
      @qaurito8081 4 года назад +9

      _totally didn't take drugs guys I promise_

    • @c.y.922
      @c.y.922 4 года назад

      More like knockback VI

  • @yangzunyaoabnerbukittimahp5033
    @yangzunyaoabnerbukittimahp5033 2 года назад +26

    technoblades voice always will resound in my brain even though he passed away. rest in peace techno

  • @erics.451
    @erics.451 4 года назад +632

    "When all hope is lost, Techno will upload."
    -Sun Tzu, The Art of War