I’m a Korean woman who spent part of my childhood in Shanghai and is planning to move to Canada this year with my same-sex partner. It was great to hear your history of experiencing both cultures and embracing both. Seems like it won’t be easy for a typical Asian-minded person like myself to adapt to Canada, but I feel encouraged hearing your words. After all, it’s quite fascinating to get to see the world in different perspectives. Thanks for a great video.
33 year old Canadian-born Chinese here, with teochew mother and hakka father dialect parentage, with both parents born in Malaysia. Really appreciate your vid as a fellow CBC who has always been on the pursuit of "finding" or becoming oneself. Love the psychology takes, Chinese people could really learn a lot from western psychology as much as western "intellectuals" could learn a lot of philosophy from Chinese Taoism, Chinese qigong, and Tai Chi. Honestly, it's up to people like to bridge bother worlds and fight against the prejudice, you know? Great job on the vid and looking forward to your future vids about these topics! Peace, love and hope
Relatable. I am a 80s kid who moved to Sweden with my parents when I was 6. Ignored my Chinese culture of most of my life to fit in until the 2010s and then relapsed hard and trying to consume as much Chinese culture I can nowadays. Still don’t fit in neither in Sweden nor in China. Swedes will never accept me as a Swede even though I have a Swedish passport, I’ve grown up in Sweden and speaks Swedish like it’s my native language. I think different from them and I can’t escape that I don’t look like them. I still get that “where are you really from” and “you speak Swedish very well for a foreigner”. And many Swedes don’t understand why I just don’t ditch my Chinese culture, because “China bad” narrative, and embrace Swedish culture. In their eyes it’s so much better, top 10 in the world in fact according to human freedom index. Oh boy you won’t hear the end of that! And they’re so salty about falling out off top 5. And the same other way around. Chinese won’t see me at Chinese because I’ve spent so much time overseas. There’s so much I don’t understand about Chinese culture so I can’t be a real Chinese, I only look the part. I have accepted that I’m a weirdo in this world. Most people will probably not relate and can’t understand my cultural background. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Good stuff… I’ll subscribe.
I've struggled with that myself, being born in Ukraine and then living in Canada and trying to adjust to this new society and culture. It's a definite journey for anyone immigrating to a new place: trying to fit in and distance from own cultural past, only to realize at the end there's no point in running away from it and there is no shame in embracing it.
Hello! I'm a subscriber on your other channel, had seen 3 videos there, and watched another one tonight, the one on rejection. Well done, and very emotionally intelligent. Then I happened to notice you had this other channel and watched this video here. Again, nicely done, and thanks for sharing your story, thoughts, and lovely pictures of growing up. Es verdad lo que dices del frame-switching, it's true what you say about the frame-switching, and also, I can even sometimes feel 답답해 or another emotion and not know how to say it in English or Spanish. As for the identity denial... It's always been interesting running into foreigners growing up here in Seattle, as my parents were both immigrants from Latin America, and it was so easy for them to be like "oh hi, where are you from, I'm from x and my husband/wife is from y", and they could easily connect over being immigrants. I'm fluent in Spanish so I can still easily do that when I run into Latinos. But I also lived in Korea for 10 years, so I can pretty well spot a Korean, and sometimes approach them, and want to connect with them, but with more hesitation, because if they're American they can tend to be more sensitive about it, similar to the "where are you from?" question your portrayed. And sometimes I, as a child of immigrants, also want to ask a 1st/2nd/3rd generation immigrant that I run into this question too, but out of a place in my heart of genuine curiosity and admiration. I love sharing my family background, and find it fascinating to hear stories of migration, food, culture, etc.. The world is a beautiful place in so many ways, and so I'm lucky to have visited my parents' countries and many more. But I'm also generally introverted, and out of respect for so many people not liking the question, I tend to let it pass. If only there weren't so many people asking this question out of rudeness or disparagingly, it would be easier for me to ask this question out of love. A little anecdote, if I may. Just 3 nights ago I was sitting outside the 2nd Starbucks here in Seattle (yes the 2nd one is slightly well-known here too), and a Korean family walked by. The dad was like "ah, Starbucks, shall we go to 스벅?" (seu-beok, a shortened version of the Korean spelling of Starbucks). And the mom was like "no no, it's 별다방" (byeol-dabang, meaning "star - old style coffeehouse", a cute nickname for Starbucks). And I piped up and said "yes, it's 별다방!" The mom, was like, yeah, right, 별다방, right? And I answered "yes!" as if I were one of my Korean students answering his teacher. And we all chuckled at each other. Connections can start simply and be beautiful out of a place of knowledge and love. Oh, and as for Shanghai, I did visit for the World's Fair in 2010. Though I didn't see much of the rest of the city, unfortunately. Hope I have a chance someday. Ended up making friends from both Pingdingshan and Taiwan. Already seems like a simpler time... No "S-U-B-S-C-R-I-B-E!"? ^^ Thanks again ~
I relate to everything you have said. This is such a beautiful video! I’ve always had to code switch between being Asian and being American and it’s always super tiring. Everyone sees me and expects that I think and act Asian, but I think and act fully American since I was born in the US. I try to be myself, but everyone around me doesn’t see or except that and that makes it very difficult. Even my own family doesn’t understand.
Great video Cynzy been awhile hope you are doing wonderful. Even though I am a westerner I definitely related to some of things you mentioned in your story. Miss the twitch streams but it is more importantly to see you alive and well. Good luck with school!!
Thank you for the video @cynzy! My girlfriend (Hong Kong) is moving to Australia soon and I'm definitely going to show her this video as I'm sure she will probably go through similar stuff, having lived in Asia her whole life .. I can't speak for everyone of course, but I can feel that seeing this kind of video would be inspiring to someone in some way who has been through or is going through a similar situation. Thank you for sharing your story.
i feel that if i went to china or any other country i would be doing the same things, trying to assimilate and reject my western culture to "fit in". I have not experienced immigrating elsewhere or not remaining in the country where i was born. I have heard similar things from other immigrant students in college who may have moved here when they were a teenager and a girl from Harbin, China who always "just wanted to be viewed as a canadian" and didnt like that she even had an accent in english. Only thing i would say is to just try to appreciate who she was and not worry so much about it and if anything, being able to live in 2 different countries and know other culture/language is an advantage over me.
So, I really want to say don't fall into false dichotomy setting when it comes to psychological definitions. Though you can define general trends like holistic or analytic thinking into antagonistic existence, the reality is most people think in both ways when considering an object or an event. It is just that some people tend to consider the nuance more in one way vs another way depending on the situation. For example, when talking about table decor, most people would think about creating a comfortable environment for dining, while others consider more about artistic design because they simply have different priorities in their context (i.e., the antagonistic behavior is not mutually exclusive in most cases). Thus some people can prioritize both aspects, and find an artistic table with comfortable dinning abilities without sacrificing either. And when you read psychology studies you should note that if sample size is large enough with enough stratified definition, you can always find some sort of statistical significance for theory crafting-sake. As human, our goal is always to know more about ourselves in order to better us as well as the community we are in. Please don't fall into the trap of stopping at explaining personal behavior. We do things for reasons that often at the time, we can not explain, but will always try to justify later so that we can just feel better about a good/bad decision. When a person falls into that way of thinking, rather than learning about ones-self, it is more akin to calming certain conscience in a lazy manner. We want to know why we think in a certain pattern, because we want to change that pattern if it is not suited for a situation or in different contexts. Just because a person is introverted, doesn't mean he/she can not develop superb social skills and have a good time during public events for long duration. And just because a person is born in China, US, Canada, or any other nations, doesn't mean it will strict that person from developing a multi-faceted way of thinking in order to solve complex issues. I personally would recommend talking to your father about how he decided to go to Canada, because during that era, getting a college education is rare let alone a western education, so I assume he is more well-versed in "being human". And I believe, he will tell you that he just made decisions that he felt right at the time. And most importantly, culture and nationality is not something of that much practical importance in living your own life. To put it simply, just because you are born in China, doesn't mean you need to only eat chinese cuisine, or that must behave in a certain manner. Even if you were in a collective society, why can't you learn to pause a bit and ask yourself if the surrounding opinion matters? That is the whole point of this reply, we thrive to not be a doll of the environment even if we know some strings are attached already. 虽然不知道这到底是做内容还是真的有内心的挣扎，但真有挣扎的话，可以静下心来想想行为是环境造就的必然，还是个人意识主导的选择？如果是前者，那也就没教育改命一说。如果是后者，那么关键不在差异，关键是如何熟练操纵两边提供的方式或方法去解决问题，而不是挣扎于两个办法潜在的冲突。举个栗子，在跟人合作的时候，可以多用集体利益的角度去缓解个人方面的利益冲突，而对付与利益上直接有竞争关系的对手的时候，就可以更多考虑个人利益的得失。每个文化潜在的意识思维方式，当你意识到以后就只是工具，别纠结哪组工具算是“正统”。不同问题可以很多不同的解法甚至组合解法。 不过话又说回来，你家老头子和妈貌似是很有故事的人，啥时候单开一个讲点故事哈。
Although there are problems with education method in China, the anti-intellectual education system in America is not that good either. Elite groups will always study hard, play hard, but the mediocre always buy into those seeming cool /anti-intellectual method
I’m a Korean woman who spent part of my childhood in Shanghai and is planning to move to Canada this year with my same-sex partner. It was great to hear your history of experiencing both cultures and embracing both. Seems like it won’t be easy for a typical Asian-minded person like myself to adapt to Canada, but I feel encouraged hearing your words. After all, it’s quite fascinating to get to see the world in different perspectives. Thanks for a great video.
33 year old Canadian-born Chinese here, with teochew mother and hakka father dialect parentage, with both parents born in Malaysia. Really appreciate your vid as a fellow CBC who has always been on the pursuit of "finding" or becoming oneself. Love the psychology takes, Chinese people could really learn a lot from western psychology as much as western "intellectuals" could learn a lot of philosophy from Chinese Taoism, Chinese qigong, and Tai Chi. Honestly, it's up to people like to bridge bother worlds and fight against the prejudice, you know? Great job on the vid and looking forward to your future vids about these topics!
Peace, love and hope
Relatable. I am a 80s kid who moved to Sweden with my parents when I was 6. Ignored my Chinese culture of most of my life to fit in until the 2010s and then relapsed hard and trying to consume as much Chinese culture I can nowadays.
Still don’t fit in neither in Sweden nor in China. Swedes will never accept me as a Swede even though I have a Swedish passport, I’ve grown up in Sweden and speaks Swedish like it’s my native language. I think different from them and I can’t escape that I don’t look like them. I still get that “where are you really from” and “you speak Swedish very well for a foreigner”. And many Swedes don’t understand why I just don’t ditch my Chinese culture, because “China bad” narrative, and embrace Swedish culture. In their eyes it’s so much better, top 10 in the world in fact according to human freedom index. Oh boy you won’t hear the end of that! And they’re so salty about falling out off top 5.
And the same other way around. Chinese won’t see me at Chinese because I’ve spent so much time overseas. There’s so much I don’t understand about Chinese culture so I can’t be a real Chinese, I only look the part.
I have accepted that I’m a weirdo in this world. Most people will probably not relate and can’t understand my cultural background. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Good stuff… I’ll subscribe.
I've struggled with that myself, being born in Ukraine and then living in Canada and trying to adjust to this new society and culture. It's a definite journey for anyone immigrating to a new place: trying to fit in and distance from own cultural past, only to realize at the end there's no point in running away from it and there is no shame in embracing it.
Hello! I'm a subscriber on your other channel, had seen 3 videos there, and watched another one tonight, the one on rejection. Well done, and very emotionally intelligent. Then I happened to notice you had this other channel and watched this video here. Again, nicely done, and thanks for sharing your story, thoughts, and lovely pictures of growing up.
Es verdad lo que dices del frame-switching, it's true what you say about the frame-switching, and also, I can even sometimes feel 답답해 or another emotion and not know how to say it in English or Spanish.
As for the identity denial... It's always been interesting running into foreigners growing up here in Seattle, as my parents were both immigrants from Latin America, and it was so easy for them to be like "oh hi, where are you from, I'm from x and my husband/wife is from y", and they could easily connect over being immigrants. I'm fluent in Spanish so I can still easily do that when I run into Latinos. But I also lived in Korea for 10 years, so I can pretty well spot a Korean, and sometimes approach them, and want to connect with them, but with more hesitation, because if they're American they can tend to be more sensitive about it, similar to the "where are you from?" question your portrayed. And sometimes I, as a child of immigrants, also want to ask a 1st/2nd/3rd generation immigrant that I run into this question too, but out of a place in my heart of genuine curiosity and admiration. I love sharing my family background, and find it fascinating to hear stories of migration, food, culture, etc.. The world is a beautiful place in so many ways, and so I'm lucky to have visited my parents' countries and many more. But I'm also generally introverted, and out of respect for so many people not liking the question, I tend to let it pass. If only there weren't so many people asking this question out of rudeness or disparagingly, it would be easier for me to ask this question out of love.
A little anecdote, if I may. Just 3 nights ago I was sitting outside the 2nd Starbucks here in Seattle (yes the 2nd one is slightly well-known here too), and a Korean family walked by. The dad was like "ah, Starbucks, shall we go to 스벅?" (seu-beok, a shortened version of the Korean spelling of Starbucks). And the mom was like "no no, it's 별다방" (byeol-dabang, meaning "star - old style coffeehouse", a cute nickname for Starbucks). And I piped up and said "yes, it's 별다방!" The mom, was like, yeah, right, 별다방, right? And I answered "yes!" as if I were one of my Korean students answering his teacher. And we all chuckled at each other. Connections can start simply and be beautiful out of a place of knowledge and love.
Oh, and as for Shanghai, I did visit for the World's Fair in 2010. Though I didn't see much of the rest of the city, unfortunately. Hope I have a chance someday. Ended up making friends from both Pingdingshan and Taiwan. Already seems like a simpler time...
No "S-U-B-S-C-R-I-B-E!"? ^^ Thanks again ~
Wow so informative!! Thank you so much for educating us while also sharing your life perspective on this!!
I relate to everything you have said. This is such a beautiful video! I’ve always had to code switch between being Asian and being American and it’s always super tiring. Everyone sees me and expects that I think and act Asian, but I think and act fully American since I was born in the US. I try to be myself, but everyone around me doesn’t see or except that and that makes it very difficult. Even my own family doesn’t understand.
Great video Cynzy been awhile hope you are doing wonderful. Even though I am a westerner I definitely related to some of things you mentioned in your story. Miss the twitch streams but it is more importantly to see you alive and well. Good luck with school!!
Thank you for the video @cynzy! My girlfriend (Hong Kong) is moving to Australia soon and I'm definitely going to show her this video as I'm sure she will probably go through similar stuff, having lived in Asia her whole life .. I can't speak for everyone of course, but I can feel that seeing this kind of video would be inspiring to someone in some way who has been through or is going through a similar situation. Thank you for sharing your story.
WHO IS THIS QUEEN she is such an inspiration 🥺
Thank you for sharing. Nice clip.
i feel that if i went to china or any other country i would be doing the same things, trying to assimilate and reject my western culture to "fit in". I have not experienced immigrating elsewhere or not remaining in the country where i was born. I have heard similar things from other immigrant students in college who may have moved here when they were a teenager and a girl from Harbin, China who always "just wanted to be viewed as a canadian" and didnt like that she even had an accent in english. Only thing i would say is to just try to appreciate who she was and not worry so much about it and if anything, being able to live in 2 different countries and know other culture/language is an advantage over me.
00:07
el color de la iluminación
(■ᴥ■.)👍
So, I really want to say don't fall into false dichotomy setting when it comes to psychological definitions. Though you can define general trends like holistic or analytic thinking into antagonistic existence, the reality is most people think in both ways when considering an object or an event. It is just that some people tend to consider the nuance more in one way vs another way depending on the situation. For example, when talking about table decor, most people would think about creating a comfortable environment for dining, while others consider more about artistic design because they simply have different priorities in their context (i.e., the antagonistic behavior is not mutually exclusive in most cases). Thus some people can prioritize both aspects, and find an artistic table with comfortable dinning abilities without sacrificing either. And when you read psychology studies you should note that if sample size is large enough with enough stratified definition, you can always find some sort of statistical significance for theory crafting-sake. As human, our goal is always to know more about ourselves in order to better us as well as the community we are in. Please don't fall into the trap of stopping at explaining personal behavior. We do things for reasons that often at the time, we can not explain, but will always try to justify later so that we can just feel better about a good/bad decision. When a person falls into that way of thinking, rather than learning about ones-self, it is more akin to calming certain conscience in a lazy manner. We want to know why we think in a certain pattern, because we want to change that pattern if it is not suited for a situation or in different contexts. Just because a person is introverted, doesn't mean he/she can not develop superb social skills and have a good time during public events for long duration. And just because a person is born in China, US, Canada, or any other nations, doesn't mean it will strict that person from developing a multi-faceted way of thinking in order to solve complex issues. I personally would recommend talking to your father about how he decided to go to Canada, because during that era, getting a college education is rare let alone a western education, so I assume he is more well-versed in "being human". And I believe, he will tell you that he just made decisions that he felt right at the time. And most importantly, culture and nationality is not something of that much practical importance in living your own life. To put it simply, just because you are born in China, doesn't mean you need to only eat chinese cuisine, or that must behave in a certain manner. Even if you were in a collective society, why can't you learn to pause a bit and ask yourself if the surrounding opinion matters? That is the whole point of this reply, we thrive to not be a doll of the environment even if we know some strings are attached already. 虽然不知道这到底是做内容还是真的有内心的挣扎，但真有挣扎的话，可以静下心来想想行为是环境造就的必然，还是个人意识主导的选择？如果是前者，那也就没教育改命一说。如果是后者，那么关键不在差异，关键是如何熟练操纵两边提供的方式或方法去解决问题，而不是挣扎于两个办法潜在的冲突。举个栗子，在跟人合作的时候，可以多用集体利益的角度去缓解个人方面的利益冲突，而对付与利益上直接有竞争关系的对手的时候，就可以更多考虑个人利益的得失。每个文化潜在的意识思维方式，当你意识到以后就只是工具，别纠结哪组工具算是“正统”。不同问题可以很多不同的解法甚至组合解法。 不过话又说回来，你家老头子和妈貌似是很有故事的人，啥时候单开一个讲点故事哈。
Although there are problems with education method in China, the anti-intellectual education system in America is not that good either. Elite groups will always study hard, play hard, but the mediocre always buy into those seeming cool /anti-intellectual method
Damn bro me too
Hello, how are you
I’m live in China if you use wechat or what’s app
So you identified with want
✔️ 𝕡𝐫ｏ𝕄ｏ𝔰𝓶