What to Do When You Are Overwhelmed
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- Опубликовано: 26 июл 2024
- When I’m overwhelmed and need to be really productive, I actually do something rather foolish. (Yes! I’m admitting it publicly on the internet!) I wonder if you do it too?!?
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Timestamps:
00:00 Introduction
02:00 Distractions
03:15 Why Do I Do This?
04:44 Frustration
05:50 Good Problem to Have
06:17 Gratitude List
06:44 Don’t Try to Multi-Task
07:58 Brain Dump 
Хобби
Thank you for this Laura ❤️ This is literally me almost daily. Right now, in this season, I'm a 1 year Breast Cancer Survivor. Paper is my Nemesis, it's the culmination of my unmade decisions, I struggle to make decisions! It's also tasks that need to done & lengthy lists of projects left undone while I was going through treatment. I often start the day with great enthusiasm & end up feeling overwhelmed & give up. Then the guilt sets in. I agree with you that gratitude can truly turned things around. God as blessed me with life, a home & family to care for. My husband's Love Language is Acts of Service, I would like to love him in that way by keeping things visually pleasing & tidied up! I appreciate how you choose positive words to describe situations & choices. I look forward to hearing about a better way to do a Brain Dump. Bless you, Laura! You're a great encouragement ❤️
I give myself migraine headaches because of this anxiety, and I call it ADHD!! I end up cooking something or preparing meals for other days and accomplish nothing!! My husband lives with lists, journals, notes and I've never learned from him because I had to be an organized child for my school teacher mother and when I got married 62 years ago, I chose to live without anything organized and here I am at 82 years of age, still floundering and you are helping!! Thank you so much.
This is me! Like everyday lately! My family is from the south too. Unless I make a list on Sunday for the week, I seem to get so little done. I also cry at everything and it drives me crazy. My one complaint about being in my 40's all the crying.
It gets better, hang in there. I remember crying about the craziest things. And if I wasn't crying I was mad as a hornet. You kinda wonder if your going nuts at times. But... it all gets better eventually. You might check with your medical professional to see if you can take any of the supplements that help to regulate hormones. Some really help. Take care.
Sounds like perimenopause
I so, so, so needed this today! You have described me to a T! It happened today, completely overwhelmed with work stuff, I broke down crying, zoned out and just gave up. Thank you 😊
Same, girl! I started purging and reorganizing my pantry/food storage. Halfway through I got bored and instead washed my windows and cleaned the blinds, which I hate doing but it was not doing the pantry. LOL I usually just "piddle around" so I'm glad I was at least productive... but I still had to finish the pantry so it only prolonged the inevitable. I love your ideas to spin the perspective! ♥
This sounds so familiar!! I do the same type thing.
I've learned the difference between stress and overload recently. When I am feeling stress I know I need to get the load down to just a few things and then prioritize them; maybe even asking for help. When in overload I know this is the state when I need to get my brain to a place of "nothing to think about." It's when I need to sit and think about nothing or something simply the colors in nature, my heartbeat...total quiet. Within 10-15 minutes the overload settles into proper perspective and I can get back to my priority list of 1-3 tasks. "By the inch it's a cinch.By the yard it feels hard." Thanks so much for your insight and upbeat disposition Laura.
Thank you for being honest, down to earth, and most of all, helpful.
Oh Laura, yes, I relate! When I know I’m going to have uninterrupted productivity time, (which is incredibly rare) I get so excited and make such amazing plans for what I’ll accomplish when the time comes. Obviously, I just know that I’ll have motivation, focus and energy - I can feel it in my bones! My list gets insanely long! 😂 Then when THAT time comes, I can’t be bothered with the list, I am just so darn excited that I do whatever I feel like! Then later, the guilt. 😣
Yes! I do this!
You described everything I do when I’m overwhelmed like in this season in my life. I’m glad I’m not alone. Thank you for this video!
You are so welcome!
Yes I can get completely overwhelmed at times
Gretchen Rubin, author of "Outer Order, Inner Calm", calls it 'procrasti-clearing' and I definitely do this too. This is when you avoid doing something by cleaning, organizing, tidying your desk, etc. I do often feel I need a clean and orderly space to think clearly, so it's a good excuse, but the reality is that I'm avoiding doing the task. I like your suggestions! Seth Godin says to look at it as "Get to vs. Have to", which is along the lines of what you are saying--recognizing that we are lucky enough to choose to do these things vs having to do them. David Allen, author of "Getting Things Done" also advises doing a brain dump and getting everything out of your head and down on paper. What I've started doing is trying to make a little progress each day, so if I don't feel up to completing an entire complicated task, maybe I do complete an easier task or just part of the complicated task (I like your suggestion of setting the timer for 30 minutes). For mental tasks, I actually do work better in the afternoon after I have done some cleaning/chores and gotten through all of my email and basic "life admin" stuff. For cleaning, I often need to get the ball rolling early in the day and then the momentum keeps me going. If I try to start mid-day after doing other things, I'm often too tired or interested in doing other things at that point--so Saturday mornings usually work best for that.
I definitely struggle with this 😩 So glad i'm not alone.
Yes, I get this phenomenon. I fear failure and will avoid beginning work on something that I fear I can’t do well, especially if it will be evaluated by others. I get ashamed in advance.
I think a brain dump could help reduce racing thoughts and clarify things. But mostly I have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Love this, it made me think of the following scripture - Prov 15:23 A man hath joy by the answer of his mouth, and a word spoken in due season - how good it is! Your word is a very due season word, can hardly wait to hear more. Thank you for sharing.
Yes, piddling is the absolutely correct term. And, yes, we all do it. Kinda like when you are going to have company for dinner and you decide to reorganize the linen closet! Like there’s an inspection coming…. Afterward, I feel foolish and annoyed, because my response seems so childish. BUT - sometimes I just need the breathing space to recharge. I like your gratitude idea and then prioritize what truly needs to be done. Thank you….🙏🏻💖
I definitely struggle with this!! This is excellent Laura. Looking forward to the next video!!
This came at the perfect time !! You read my mail to the Lord today 🤣 I love how you turned it to a gratitude thought.
Ps. My Mom said “piddling around” all the time. I haven’t even thought of that term until you said it. My Mom is PNW so I don’t know where it came from but since she is gone …this made me laugh and have a great memory about Mom just in time for Morhers Day!!!!
🤗
Laura, thank you for pointing out this issue. I have been going through this for years. I love counted cross stitching, sewing, vintage items, antiques and paper. My sewing room is so cluttered it's unbelievable. I can't get to the sewing machine at the moment with everything that is on top of it so there lies stacks of things to sew, mend, complete, you name it. I have just found your site and look forward to learning new tricks.
Omg! Its like you're looking inside my brain! I'm 48. But was just diagnosed with ADHD last year. Working with a therapist and taking Vyvance has been so helpful! But girl! I can relate!!
Thank you! This is where I am right now
Yes to all of this!! Everything you said resonated with me---thank you!! I love the videos in the car in pickup line---a great use of your time and so relatable for all of us Moms!! I find that if I make a time-list with tasks broken down into reasonable time frames, I tend to focus better these days. I also write down getting ready, so I can mark it off. (Sometimes this is a task I dread TBH...lol!!)
Love the time- list!
Wow! I can relate to the non productive time wasting . If I would just get the list made and prioritize and get busy , I would get so much more done and not feel guilty. I’ll work on the gratitude attitude to see if that helps. Thanks for your thoughts on this.
Me too!😂 Your 30 minute timer suggestion plays into a saying I use for a project I've had a hard time starting, and that is "Well begun is half done". And once the time is up, sometimes I keep at it, but I've given myself permission to stop too. Thanks for the brain dump suggestions in the follow-on video, I keep a small notebook and pen with a light at the tip so I can write down things that get into my brain during the night. Really helps with getting back to sleep!
Yeah, that's definitely something that I constantly struggle with. My "guilty pleasure" during those moments is watching RUclips videos (i.e. this video lol). Another thing that I struggle with is not necessarily not wanting to pick just one item on my to-do list at a time but that I really don't know what I should be prioritizing, as a clean house is very important to me and helps me concentrate but I'm also trying to start my own business (I'm in EBA Foundation with Ruth Soukup. She mentions you, in the course, as one of her very successful students 😊). So I never know what to prioritize. As the house is a mess, but every time I do cleaning then I take away time that I could be focusing on my business and vice versa when I focus on my business I feel guilty that I'm not cleaning. I love my fiancee to death, however, he really doesn't help me out with cleaning and even when I ask him to do simple cleaning tasks while I'm at my part-time job he either "forgets" (even when I write it down 🙄) or he just keeps saying "I'll get to it, I'll get to it." And he never "makes" his kids do any cleaning (they are 8 and 11), as he just keeps saying "well they won't do it correctly so I just eventually do it." So then that adds to my frustration as well. Sorry this comment turned into more so venting at the end lol 🤦♀️
Yes, this is helpful. Steps to reframe me refocus! I love it! Piddling around is real!
It sure is!
I have been piddlein’ around for the past 6 months.. eegads. I have so much I want to do, and need to do, and I do- a whole bunch of nothing!! I am grateful for so much yet I do nothing.
Laura, I'm originally from East TN & now live 2 hrs north of you, so I know all about piddling. I have found that if I give myself 1 or 2 projects a day I can accomplish thier. If I write an entire list I get overwhelmed & won't do any of it. Great video.
Boy do you have me pegged. Thank you. This gives me some inspiration to refocus myself.
You can do it!
Oh yes been there recently.
Had a day worked out in my head . Nothing went the way it was supposed to go . Got frustrated with the entire day .
This came at the perfect time. I am so overwhelmed right now. My husband recently passed away, suddenly, and dealing with everything is astronomical. I am suffering with severe arthritis in one hip which limits my mobility. Many times, instead of facing even the laundry, I will sit down and watch you tube or read to escape the situation at hand. My friends have offered to help but I am embarrassed. You have helped today. Thank you.
My heart goes out to you, Jill. Please accept friends' offers of help and be gentle with yourself. There are very few things (nothing?) you must do all by yourself in this difficult time. Let someone walk beside you. 🫂🤗
@@lsfrizor9314 Thank you very much for your kind words. God Bless.
I’m so sorry for your loss. This is very understandable with grief. I’ve been recently going through the same thing processing the loss of my grandfather (my father figure) for the last year and a half. I also didn’t want to accept help when it was offered due to embarrassment. I’ve always been the “strong” one. Trust me, there is no shame in accepting the help. My mom offered to help me because she saw my struggle on the outside looking in without even seeing my home or fully having a conversation about my mental health yet. I declined at first, but then I accepted and I’m glad I did. Things are hard. Life is hard. Grief is hard. We aren’t meant to carry things alone or process things alone. Your friends seem very kind. Definitely rethink letting them help you. Please remember you aren’t alone ❤️❤️❤️ praying for your healing and comfort during this difficult time and always ❤️❤️
@@niikkii_ Thank you so much for the kind words and understanding. I am getting closer accepting help but have not actually done it yet. God Bless you Nikki. Sending hugs and love and prayers to you also in your struggles.
Hi Laura - yes I relate very much to this. I like your tips about reframing, etc. very much and look forward to next week's video. Two things I struggle with in relation to this is choosing one thing when several things seem to have the same priority level. And, probably related to that, putting the brakes on and working steadily through something rather than rushing through it to get to the next thing and tick it off my list - often leading to me doing the initial task poorly or having to go back and do it again!
I can definitely relate to me, especially about checking on Facebook.
I live alone & Facebook etc is often the only way I interact with other people.
I’m in the UK & every morning I watch the This Morning programme. I know I could be doing other things but often don’t.
I’m looking forward to the next video.
Laura,
Thank you so much for the many insights in this video! I had several “Aha!!” moments as I listened. I never really thought about WHY I do exactly what you described. I’d also forgotten the notion of doing 30 minute microbursts, so thank you for that reminder!
I can’t wait to hear next week’s video!!
You are so welcome!
This is me for 5 or 6 years on my home. I have adhd. Depression. Anxiety and I sm a Christian... I have meds and the do w work mostly. All the time.. no.. It us so discouraging. I HATE IT AND GET SO MADE AT MYSELF... I HAVE TO
LITTERALLY CRY OUT TO God for help. Thank you. I NEEDED THIS. BUT MY CELL I use for help and Christian songs and also to get away from the depression. It has to stop
Hahaha soooo true! I do struggle with making decisions including what is the most important thing I should be doing right now.
Yes, yes, yes! You have hit the nail on the head for me. I am my own worst enemy (as my mom used to say about herself. How's THAT for positive self talk? 😂😂😂 -- not a thing in the 1960's for a child of the Great Depression, I guess!) I think you have something there, with your thought about not wanting to make a choice about just one project. Also -- for me -- I realize that there's a fear of failure involved. If I totally invest myself and give it my all, what if it doesn't work out the way I hope it does? If i just half do it, or procrastinate til I am forced to do tbe best I can in a limited amount of time, that gives me an " out" for it not being up to initial expectations/my vision.
Oh yes I think we all do this especially when we as mums are on our own and the house is empty as it’s a rare occasion.
I love that phrase as piddling around, we in Australia some say fart assing around lol
I completely understand. I do it a lot lately and the sad thing is my child is grown and moved out of the house with her own family. I have all kinds of ideas for my house but when I get up in the morning I find all kinds of ways to procrastinate. I like a clean house but I absolutely hate cleaning especially dishes.
I hear you!
yes I relate. Mostly is boredom, don't feel like doing it, I got laundry basket to fold, it's 4 days. deep clean an area of home don't want to do it, is hard for me, to deep clean I have to take everything out first and is not cluttered!!! it gets messy. don't like it. I say if is decluttered don't need to be a clean freak. Don't like to do it. so I give myself these goals that are not done, no boxes checked off.
Thank you! It's nice to know I'm not alone! 😊 I like what you said about the things you need to do are really because of the blessings you have. Great perspective!
Yes! Thank you!
Oh so right!! Multi-task does NOTHING. For me. I get nothing done. Timers are out friend!
You hit the nail on the head. Never met you but it sure sounded like you know me all too well. Lisa Hale also hit that nail in her comment. WOW!! Thought I was alone with this issue. Wow, Holly De Jong...I totally understand as I also am a Breast Cancer Survivor but I found out after done going through treatment that either the cancer itself or the act of going through treatment or the "cocktails" that I was given, have left my mind boggled to get things done. (I have ended up with ADD and that's part of why I get overwhelmed and don't finish projects.)
You ARE NOT ALONE!!!!
Thanks!
You just took me from feeling like I am a scatterbrain and should just accept that I’ll never have organization and peace in my life to believing i just might be able to successfully get done what needs to be done! 😃
I really appreciate your honesty, it certainly helped me to feel I wasn’t alone. Thank you 😊
In the spirit of honesty, I am pretty sure my productivity level won’t be improving much until this Johnny Depp trial is over 🙄 am I the only one out there that’s obsessed ???!! Lol
Haha!!! You definitely aren't alone in this journey of feeling overwhelmed when it comes to organizing. You can do it!
So excited about watching! For real, your timing is unCANNY!
Hope you enjoyed it!
I'm so overwhelmed 😭🤣I need to basically need to demo & redecorate my tiny space into a home & music studio .. It's less then 400sqft (pray for me) 😆
I don't know where to start.. Pull everything out & redo the walls, & add trim & paint .. Then add cabinets & furniture? But, in the meantime we need furniture to live with right now & a way to organize what's already here .. Which sounds easy enough but, then I have to buy things to do that with 😭 Overwhelmed but, I'm also blessed to even be able to do this .. I'm excited 😀❤️ Ty for the video ❤️ Where do I start lol? 😆
It’s a very common thing. I do the same thing
Oh my gosh. That's so me! 🙋♀️🤦♀️
yes I do this too, sigh. I think often I do it because I just don't want to do the thing i have to get done. And you know what? it still needs to get done and the effort I put into avoiding it and feeling stressed is often far greater than the effort it would take to JUST DO IT. I'm working on this.
So very true!
Great video. Oh yes! I absolutely do this too
Great explanation. Thank you
VERY helpful!!! Thank you!!! This is me... practically every day. Thank you for the tips, Laura!
You are so welcome!
yes I do this some, always helpful tips from you.
Oh. my gosh. This is so me- 100%. It actually helps to take ADHD medication, it helps over the motivation hump. I definitely struggle to get the big things done, because I don't want to forget about the little things.
You ‘hit the mail on the head’ as my Dad would have said ( coastal N.C. ) You described how I act all to often. I drive myself crazy. I am looking forward to the lesson on ‘brain dumping’. Peggy
Laura, I can so relate to what you are describing. It happens (no, I let it happen) almost every day for me. I like your suggestion for how to think about it and I'll give it a try. Thank you.
Love that - I "let" it happen. You can do it!
I've done this for the last 8 years no joke PS thanks for the video look forward to the next one well I always look forward to your videos‼️
Glad you enjoyed it!
I will do both, zoning out or doing a different task/project that is easier than what I should be doing. 🙄
Wow. This is me.
this is exactly why im watching this video! 🙈 ... well at least its just thr right video i'm watching!😁
Listen to you while I have to write bills 🤣
I am watching this right now and not doing any of the things on my list. :)
😂😂😂all the time!
I am very interested in learning more about successful Brain Dumps
Projective procrastination
This is sounds like ADHD. For me it's very common.