So sorry Andrew for the pain you’ve endured but it wasn’t in vain. You’ve helped countless people you’ll never meet but know your very much appreciated. Thank you 😊 Sending you a virtual hug 🤗
It's been just over two months since he abandoned me, destroyed my heart, slammed me to my very core. No one came to my rescue. No one understands what a covert narcissist does behind closed doors. I know my God sees all, he knows the truth and he will have to answer for his evil deeds one day soon and my healing will be to give my all to follow my faith and walk in love.
It changed me forever. I am a hermit now. I used to be a social, people pleaser. Now, I am discerning, and if energy is not reciprocal, I have no interest. Stay strong tribe!❣️
Thank you and the same to you that was very kind of you. Keep on surviving and don't forget our lord listens and knows our pain, give it all to him. 🙏🏻
Once trapped by a narcissist , they control your emotions , your time and all of your decisions . They make you their toy and tool to use whenever they want. We are not fools . We are people who have big hearts and faith in others and have no reason to distrust people we know . We would make lousy soldiers because we care more about others than ourselves .
I have to say there are soldiers with very big hearts. They sacrifice their lives for others. Empaths are soldiers in a war like no other, I think. Be brave. God speed.
There's a sense of relief once we fully let go of people who are possessed by dark energy. It can be difficult to reach that point, but it is essential for our well being to get there. Thank you for all the empowering work you provide us, Andrew, always appreciated.
@peterhensler7930, Yes. Or they put on a good show of charm or love, doing the love-bombing stage, stroking your ego. They move into sex fast to entice you that way too.
Tonight I went Christmas shopping with my daughters. We had such a blast laughing and being goofy. I forgot about the narcissist for most of the day…very little ruminating. It was such a relief to not think about him. I dreaded the ride home by myself fearing the slap-in-the-face return of the constant rumination. I concentrated on how grateful I am for my children and the fact that I could feel like myself again. Today was a good day. I pray everyday that he will fade from my mind. God help us all. It’s such a long road to recovery ❤
That is great that you got to be goofy and laugh. I found last summer that when I could laugh again, the ruminations disappeared. Best wishes on your healing path.
Look like we did the same thing today I had to get out the house to go take my new grandbaby to take Santa Claus picture at the mall today I been feeling down send Thursday my kids daddy actually calling me to tell me he finally seen my ex-husband and his new supply after I told if he every seen th please do not confirm he actually have a new supply I already know because the brother told me in May telling what was going on I'm tired of these flying monkey tell me he good and smiling I had been crying the last two days still traumize over this reminisce over him what we did together 17years in this man life just over there in April then went on my cruise came back and got discarded. I had to get out the house to feel better and I did I had a good time my daughter and her baby daddy and the baby. I trying ro forget him listening to these podcast help me alot that these people don't change but change partner. I pray you keep healing and get back to what we all was happy with life❤
Not one person came to my help. People have no clue what this is. You have to do it yourself through God. Thank brother you are a wealth of knowledge. You are helping people!
Most people do not understand unless they have been through it. Once you are out, your clarity returns and you see how destructive narcissists have been.
I went thru 10 years wa narc….. when I met him I was an innocent, when I finally left, I was a broken person. I am a survivor. Bruised and broken but I am alive~ 🎉
I was actually able to take a nap today, no Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde kicking or shaking me awake and berating me... aaand, the rain clouds rowed away, and the sky is blue and the sun is shining 😊 I am glad you made it too Andrew... because you have made a difference in my healing journey🫶✌️ 😊
Just now starting to feel better after 20 yr marriage to a covert narcissist,flying monkeys my daughter,my sister ,all his side of family .been solely alone for 3 Christmases now. Lonely life but oh my goodness I got a lot of clarity,can’t believe these people existed thanks for your channel
@marylytle7888 Yes absolutely Yes. When you look at the comments most everyone is very kind, supportive, polite … share the videos. This is how the word gets out there -
It is difficult when you call these people your family for many years and if one of them was someone you gave birth to. But it must be done if you want to regain your mental and/or physical health. It took me a long time to stop crying and embrace and love myself more than those who were putting me down and hurting me. Thanks, Andrew. You are a great help. Wishing you all the best.
I'm still in the crying phase, feeling like a deer stuck in headlights. I've been here before with leaving narcs in my life.. but this time it's my now ex covert narc mother.. This one is seriously affecting me 💔 I trusted her all my life. 47 years of illusion. 😢
@user-ro3rv4nw2n Beautifully said... it's painful, but the only way to heal your soul, and find peace🕊. I'm praying for all of you, struggling. But always remember, the Good Lord knows your true heart! He can help you... just ask 🤲, and open the door for him. God bless you all 🙏.
@@c.a.5808 you are absolutely right. I am on my path with God, the highest power. it guides me and gives me strength. I am grateful for everything, my life, my peace and my heart. I would not trade with anyone. God bless, sending my love to you.
He hit me and made me cry on my birthday a few months ago. That was the last straw, I broke up with him. It's been a painful journey but every day I am more and more grateful that he's gone. Andrew you have helped me learn about NPD, I had no idea when I met and fell in love with him. Instead of wallowing in self-pity, I now spend my time looking at each piece of me that made me an attractive supply to him. Reconciling the broken parts, the old wounds, has been tough but necessary. Thank you so much for these videos, they have been a lifesaver for me.
My heart goes out to you for what happened on your birthday. Every birthday, I went through grief & sorrow. They ruin everything that's special for US.
These dark relationships do change you. I no longer care one way or the other what happens to him, but I’m much more cynical and wary of people now and I don’t like being this way. In the long run that experience may protect me from future abuse, but I feel like he stole a piece of me I’ll never get back.
A covert narc former "friend" now is hoovering and trying to suck me back in. I've got a great tactic if we come across each other in the neighborhood or in town. As soon as he starts speaking, I lift my arm and stare at my watch while he's speaking for about 5 seconds. Then I say "Gotta Run!" and walk away while he's still speaking. Trust me, he deserves it. Other times I forego the watch action and just keep walking and wave "bye bye" while he tries to hoover. I'm at the point of having fun with it.
Thank you for describing when “no one is in your corner “. Wow! That hit home . Blows my mind but I’m stronger for it. Getting stronger everyday . Really appreciate how you give details of abuse /survivorship . I appreciate your work ….. Ann
Ann I know how you feel. It’s been a 18 months and I feel free even if I am not divorced to him. Here on this site you will get support and real caring from people you never met. Stay strong!!!
This is exactly where I find myself now - stuck in a narcisstic relationship with my husband and two kids who have all turned against me (thanks to my narcisstic husband). He brainwashed them over a period of years and now they play mean and wicked narcisstic games on me. They know I won't last long - they know I am an empath. It's all a sinister plan to get rid of me ... forever!
The ex wife turned our oldest daughter against me. Parent Alienation. The oldest daughter is just like her mother now, hateful and vindictive. I quietly walked away. There is peace and drama free atmosphere with me. Life goes on. I am tired of dealing with toxic creatures.
I realized today that he don’t matter at all anymore when I didn’t care to respond to his messages or even read it. I have peace and I can get a good nights rest.
I was actually thinking about this earlier today at work, how certain people really don't matter to me anymore. I can love them from afar, but not really like them much. The few I really trust and have been there and continue to be there, is all that's important. Small circle, happy life! Sending love, light and virtual hugs to you and all! ❤️✨️🤗
I don't understand how one can love but not like. I no longer love most of my toxic family and find it completely alien to imagine that I could love them, close up or afar.
@LyndaHill that's totally understandable. When I speak of love them, I'm speaking from a universal perspective of loving everyone, which is how I view humanity will evolve into. Until then, I can love everyone, but not necessarily like their actions or lack of integrity, thus boundaries must be set to keep them away from my energy. There were times in the past where I found myself spewing nasty things and feeling very low and angry toward toxic individuals. All that did was set me into a spiral of self destruction. And, yes it still rears its ugly head at times. That being said, I make a conscious choice each day whether to hold on to that low state of being, or move forward into the light.
@sherrywayne444 Thanks for your thoughtful reply. I'm definitely not wishing ill on anyone but don't have space in my heart for these people any more. And that includes my grown children. I can barely believe that I'm writing this, although it's been over four years since any communications with any of them. Toxic families are a real trip, even as I'm an extremely loyal person, to be treated the way they treated me means for me that they won't ever have a seat at my table. It really only took one malignant narc to blow the entire thing up. Anyways, thank you and best wishes.
I absolutely understand the dark night of the soul and wondered if you had also descended into that depth of suffering. It’s a place from which many don’t return, but if you persevere, it leads to profound understanding. Your awareness opens up after the death of your ego. I’m so glad you survived and transcended your suffering.
For the first time, and I'm 61, I am not attending family gatherings for the holidays. I skipped Thanksgiving, had a good time by myself, and I'm looking forward to being on my own for Yule as well. Thank you for the video, Andrew! ❤
Even though you are in the clear physically and emotionally from these "energy stealers/drainers" and can now say to yourself "Wow, they actually dont matter to me no more", be aware still and never fully forget those horrible experiences and confirm to yourself that the person who was responsible for all that heartache was trash, and you got rid of and took out that trash yesterday and nobody ever cares or looks back at yesterday's trash. Stay wise and strong healed ones and wish you forever peace.
you are so right Andrew, my Husband the Narcissist thought he “had me” so brain washed that he had full control of me and that he could mentally abuse and misuse me for my entire life. Although he has not lived in the same house (he’s in Assisted Living with Alzheimers) with me for 2 1/2 years, Andrew your videos provide so much information you have been able to open my eyes to some things the Narcissist (and his Flying Monkeys) did that I hadn’t realized what was done to me during this 54 yrs of marriage.
Almost 3 years post narc. No contact. I went thru dark night of the soul. Narc soooo doesn't mean anything to me. All the flying Monkees r out of heart mind, and soul. It will take a lot of work!!!!!
Wow three years with no contact. I’m proud of you. Dark night of the soul…. it hurts soooo bad. I know. I’m three months out. I have no contact. I’m just trying to be good to myself. And then I can be good for those around me. I hope your life is going the way you want.
What i hate the Most is my own behavior Not what they did or do. It is what i did and do that dont resonate with my deepest self. I cant and i wont say i dont Care about them but i have distance to them and will keep it that way.
One last thing... It is my turn to help other people recover and move on from narc relationships. 5 women have to come to me over the last year of my hard study of narcissim. And now it is my turn to HELP THEM. As so many others helped me survive this last year. This world is give and recieve .. We just have to learn to be decerning and act on it with clear boundaries. There are good people in this world! We must stay open to receive the blessings. That is the one thing i refused to let the demon narcs take from me. Real loving relationships.
Sometimes its been so long without the flying monkeys left in the wake of my total disregarded ex, that I ll say Im an only child. When people I see out ask about my siblings I have to think if I really have any . Its so much better this way.
This is time consuming but worthwhile and you are correct - forever changed. Boundaries are not wiggly anymore, it's stressful to be that way, at first. Then, the new you decides that feels good to have respect again. So take your time to get to know yourself again, and your opinion matters. Your voice matters. You can come a long way giving yourself the time, care and attention you freely gave away to the ungrateful. Never again ❤
This gentleman has been thoughtful enough to share some very important information in how to navigate in a world filled with narcissistic types. It can be stunning and at times overwhelming to discover just how many people are like this.Over my lifetime I have found that narcissists are fundamentality very weak people who need to control others and make them feel less than in order to maintain power or dominance. Over time these people can and will inflict severe emotional damage that, if left unchecked, can negatively impact one's life. Escaping free from this is like walking from darkness into sunshine.
After my mother died I obtained her medical records from her doctor. The doctor had written that my mother had gone to see him with depression, and one of the reasons she gave for her depression was that “her children were failures “. You reminded me of that when you said you don’t want to drive 6 hours at Christmas just to be criticised.
I am so sorry Andrew that no one checked if your ok. I know how you felt i was isolated too and it is so lonely and the narc kicks you at your worst moment. Your such kind person with a good pure heart ❤
Andrew is talking about real freedom!!!! Real freedom is we get to decide what we want in our lives. My soon to be ex of 27 years is a few blocks away ( he picked the place) and I have zero idea where he is and who he is with. I have no hatred towards him. You can’t hate the “ wall” , you can’t hate “ the rocks in your yard”. You can’t hate someone whom will never ever understand what he is and what he did. Hatred eats you up alive. The best way to channel your sadness, your sorrow, your pain, your anger and your loss of your dream is to be happy away from the source of misery that use to be in your life. I walked around all day thinking how happy I am to be alive and away from the Narcissist. God Bless you Andrew and God Bless this wonderful community of caring people who watch your channel.
@@lourdesecheverria6209 You are very wise. I now listen to only people I choose to listen and I hold back believing until I can verify. God Bless you also. Your name sounds like maybe I can say “ Obrigada”?? Have a great night.
I used to Hate. Through the years, it was clear, it was totally wasted thoughts and emotional energy ... ( honestly ) I read at least a half a dozen people I Hated, in the Obits. It was a stunner and the question was: ""Now, where do I put all this hatred I had for these creeps??" Oddly, I learned to hate no one. I just avoid people that rub me the wrong way like the Plague. And Andrew's wisdom and info helps me spot 'em quicker.
@@jhavajoe3792 Good idea. Hating requires energy. When you read something inspiring you feel good and when you read something bad that a person did, it upsets you leaving you feeling down. Holding on to hate affects nobody except the person who has those feelings. You don’t have to forgive- but you can let go.
"Emotional vampires" is quite accurate! I personally think NARCS are Sociopaths. I read an apt description of their mindset which really helped me: "When love is a tool to be used to trap and manipulate someone, sociopaths can love." Unlike this community of REAL love & support, the physical pain (draining) of being abused takes a toll on your psyche. Don't expect an apology or closure. There are none. YOU HAVE to break the cycle yourself. Much love to all of you ❤
Patience is the best prayer. I have been out for 6 years now & interesting is, that I still meet these kinda people trying to approach me & we do learn how to handle them in a better way protecting ourselves. The rabbit hole trip teaches us to become sensitive to the lying cheating darker people. We can develop. We stay the cuddly maybe naiv rabbit, but now we are the bunny with a gun. Do not mess with us anymore. Go away & enjoy your messy life on your own. A lonely road. They underestimate us big time. Ty
Mom, sis, bro, n dad, REFUSED to have an adult to adult relationship w me. At 32, I began to put up boundaries, stand up for myself- and literally EVERYTHING EXPLODED. They began actively attempting to ruin my life and even in several occasions placed me in mortal danger. Been no contact nearly 5 years. Biggest bully, dad, has died. I felt RELIEF. Thanks for your important work, Andrew ❤
My question is why did I fall so hard and take it? That is disturbing to me. Never again will someone treat me like this and me, take it. It’s more about me than her. I believed in something beautiful. She didn’t feel my idea of beautiful was the same. At least for a while I thought something was amazing. It was sooooo good. And now it’s soooo sad. I’m glad I had something that felt real for a little while. Maybe someday I’ll feel that again. If not, that’s okay too. At least I felt something amazing. And then I felt so awful and painful. It’s so confusing. I just want to give my best no matter what. I’m happy to learn and grow. My heart goes out to all of us who feel the deepest pain ever. Maybe great joy is ahead. At the very least, no more pain.
It is a massively positive thing when they do not matter to you any more. When you finally stop caring what they think or say. The path to healing was to go inwards and discover and understand everything we had been trough and find ways to heal our wounds . Thank you Andrew 😊 God bless you ❤❤❤
The focus must be on yourselves/ourselves and in our "broken" hearts. NO one checking on you/me/us is not a shock to anyone who has been in a narcissistic relationship. Ii is a fact. The narc does NOT CARE. Blessings! ❤❤
I look forward to seeing your videos as they are so helpful and giving me the clarity and knowledge to heal from 33 years of abuse. Thank you Andrew and I am so sorry that you were hurt too❤ Namaste
It's your universe, the narcissist is a reflection of your fear and insecurities, change your mind believe it , change the narcissist. Remember they are sick people, damaged by the world.
I’m looking forward to moving to a new city and meeting new folks. At 72 I’m still active in business and gym and who knows there may still be life in my life. Thank you Andrew for giving me a new perspective. I’ve been separated since 4 years and still healing
Of all the horrors of the relationship, one of the most degrading and soul destroying for me was the public defamation on social media. It was their favorite weapon of choice and the hardest injustice to deal with.
I can only guess how you knew about any Facebook posts. I hope you have gone through it and are done. It is always a good idea to tell friends and family that you do not want to hear anything that he is doing, who he is with, who he is doing what with where and when, or what he is saying about you. You can't control that and it is best to just not be informed about it at all.
I'm working towards healing from exposure to a narcissist son and daughter in law, i have cut all contact, because they make me physically ill. I will always love my son, but i don't like him, and i don't have to ether.
It’s 2:42 cst on 12/9/23. I have listened to all of your videos. They are all perfectly right on. Thank you very much! They have all helped me tremendously!
You mentioned the phenomenon of the narc bringing up past shame and throwing it in your face. I heard a therapist say that they only want to recognize the version of you that they had the most control over, despite how much time has passed or how much you’ve changed. It’s one reason why, for instance, a narc mom will bring up dumb $hit you did in your teen years. You might be 40 with two kids and a mortgage, but mom treats you like a ‘dumb’ 16 year old. Why? She can’t control the 40 year old you in the way she could with the 16 year old version. I dunno if that tidbit will help anyone else, but hearing that was 🤯 for me. And if you’re young, reading this? It WONT change. Take action now. I’m 53, she’s 81 and the dynamic is the same. We’re LC and she doesn’t want to hear about my job or life, but she’ll bring up me getting bullied in middle school like it was yesterday.
@@barrys7515 you’re welcome😎 Yeah, when I first heard this, I thought about it for probably 3 days straight. I kept thinking about how she’ ll talk to me like I’m a teenager and expect me to respond like one. She’ll bring up old embarrassing stories from years ago and try to push my buttons. When I heard this theory, it all made so much sense.
That makes so much sense that they only want to recognize the version that they could control. That explains why they are stuck in fifty or sixty years ago and childhood. Thanks.
Made my own analogy years ago, before understanding Narcissism. I likened parents raising you in their funky ( sometimes ignorant) ways when you were a sapling. Not being with a depth of understanding of their children being individuals, self-cultivating of their own minds and spirit, those parents continued to use their old, cheap, rusty, worn out gardening tools and will do so to the end. Humans are often creatures of habit. Some are unchangeable. The late musician Joseph Zawinul, who played with Miles Davis, quoted: "The Son sits on the shoulders of the Father ( in your case Mother) and sees farther."
All so true, and the people in my life that are still willing to listen to my struggles just don't understand why i don't just leave. No one can possibly understand the hell you need to go thru to escape a narcissist unless you have been through it.
Keep on listening to andrew, read everything that you can, start making a plan, start setting up boundaries, look up The Grey Rock method to help you get through it. You absolutely must break free, these people can actually make you emotionally ill and even physically ill. I understand how hard it is to do it, but I can also tell you that I did do it, and so did many others, and you can do it too.
The key word punishment is real in physical,mental and spiritual ways. Once we process such actions on our lives and learn it will NEVER change, it is then that the narcissts no longer matter. What matters is one's inner healing. Peace will enter and the world is now light full of hills to climb , glory found on summits. These golden moments alone are worth more than gold and bring peace , a healing balm ❤
You are so beautiful inside and out. Thank you for this message. Spent some time reflecting today with a woman who stepped into my life post discard and for how aligned the synchronization is of your messages to my own life is I can simply say it must be God at work. Loved this video too. They don’t matter. It’s all let go. And I have peace 😌 I pray this peace for all still in the pain and struggle. Andrew we weren’t alone with you here ❤️🙏
My last narc thought he was insulting me during my sleep, about 18 months after that it became glaringly obvious that my family were the first and most pressing problem, now I am free
Yeah your whole world implodes; it is like being in a deep dark hole that gradually (with a ton of emotional work, education, and effort) starts to get filled up. After months or years, one day you realize the hole has been filled and you are back on level ground where you can FINALLY walk away .. FOR GOOD!!! 😊
I really like you Andrew. I can tell you know what's up. I also had a horrible repulsive discard and my close family were cowards. My life was ruined and justice system weaponized against me. Its been a long hard road. I feel so much stronger but I don't know who is friend or foe. I still know I am being stalked. I have told so many so called professionals. The system is a joke. Just where I fell after the disgraceful discard.
Father was a Malignant Monster that created sibling rivalry to divide. Haven’t associated w/sibling in over two decades. Who divorced her husband and is no longer in any cont with her, Own child! A Mother that was a Covert, an a enabler. She betrayed, her children to procure her, Own safety! After the discovery of a Lifetime, of Family secrets? I terminated contact w/Father a decade+ ago! An waited 5yrs to exact revenge upon Mother. Who embraced another abusive addict Narc after divorcing the Malignant Narc. Which, as Fate would have? Victimized her yet, Again! These people were Never Family! I’ve created my Own & flourished. Beautiful wife & daughter, I was told I’d never have.
I have a narcissist son that put me through torture for years and years and when I was laying dying in the hospital and the minister called him he called back. He says I don't think I want to talk to her. Because I don't get along with my mother.
When I asked Father to lead me to someone who would help me understand Your video popped up. Didnt know about narcissist. Thanks for the knowledge. Finally the devorce is final. Nothing left but my mind is free. The wounds are healing. And despite all their attempts I am alive. I'm sure that one pisses them off. Especially after canceling my life insurance.
When I found out my wife was cheating with a single mother with two children, she called her, “some bitch,” and criticized me for having empathy for her. As upset as I was about the lying and cheating, what bothered me most was that she didn’t care about lying to this other person at all. My dad taught me that when you hear someone talking bad about someone behind their back, they are doing the same regarding you when you’re not around. I saw the total lack of empathy toward the two children she took out to dinner (with my $$$) and took on fishing trips as her victims. When we were packing to leave the state she had two mini fishing vests in her car and told me to throw them out. To me it was a tragedy. The fact I ever consider myself missing this person is intolerable. But it’s a sign of my love and compassion for others and not a weakness as she considered it to be.
What is every bit as freeing as well is that now I know I never mattered to them either. I understand that I have no obligation to them or their flying monkees. Onward with a much lighter sense of direction. 😊 My "spidey sense" is strong and protective too! Andrew and subs on this beautiful channel, God bless and keep you! ❤
The two siblings and their families don't matter anymore. I do still love them, but I leave them to their own lives and pitfalls. One would think that if I went through last year with my adult son who also went through the legal letters and rage fits, it would have been easier. In truth, we had a very rough year during 2022. It was far worse than losing my husband of 46 years in 2021, and almost losing my house and business to a 180,000 acre fire around my canyon, evacuating for six days, and then massive flooding. No, the two siblings tried to take us out starting with my Mom's death bed in 2022. A year ago, was truly terrible for both of us. The best thing was that we were good cheerleaders to each other, and we are thriving this December. We have grown so much. We've had isolated lives since April 1, 2021. We're both on the healing path. Never could have planned the crazy happenings.
Many men and women spend their whole lives getting over dysfunctional upbringings...ADHD can complicate relationships...My hope is that those who are hurting, will get the help they need, heal, and learn to love completely. Thanks.
I am so glad I found your channel this morning. I have been a people pleaser, always wanted everyone to like me. I have been used and through the years I have disconnected with many people as I have seen through them, sometimes feeling guilty about it. Your video shows me what I have done is healthy behavior. I will continue to be me, be empathetic, and be loving, but to those who deserve it. THANK YOU.
My family is a nest of snakes. My father was receiving sadistic pleasure by humiliating me and saying things like: are you loser? Are you a loser? He did it secretly and smiled seeing my pain. My mother was screaming at me and they both called me ugly. They played victims and were beating each other, I had to keep saving them. They are horrible people and the other relatives in my family. Sometimes the ones who are close to you are your biggest enemies, and Bible said that too. Thank you so much, Andrew.
I have average or mild empathy (not above average). I reserve it for those that deserve it, never for people that are among the dark triad or tedrad types.
The one thing I’ve heard nothing about , when your adult children are flying monkeys, some being diagnosed with narcissism, and your ex is a psychopath, narcissist and you see all the disorders of , and all the various things that accompany this cluster. Yes, you had to cut ties with your own adult children.
![Seungmin "그렇게, 천천히, 우리(As we are)" | [Stray Kids : SKZ-PLAYER]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/kAzmhLHePqU/mqdefault.jpg)
So sorry Andrew for the pain you’ve endured but it wasn’t in vain. You’ve helped countless people you’ll never meet but know your very much appreciated. Thank you 😊 Sending you a virtual hug 🤗
Thank you..🙏💜😌⛰️
1966
18
They always target the babies.
6
The moment I realized they don’t matter to me anymore is when I realized I am myself again and don’t need validation from anyone but myself.
I pray I can can get there
💯💯🙏
Amen
lovely
It's been just over two months since he abandoned me, destroyed my heart, slammed me to my very core. No one came to my rescue. No one understands what a covert narcissist does behind closed doors. I know my God sees all, he knows the truth and he will have to answer for his evil deeds one day soon and my healing will be to give my all to follow my faith and walk in love.
It changed me forever. I am a hermit now. I used to be a social, people pleaser. Now, I am discerning, and if energy is not reciprocal, I have no interest. Stay strong tribe!❣️
Ditto! 😊❤
@@a.zavala2355 Not an exciting existence but peaceful and safe.❣️
Same
Don't let these narcs keep us down! Get out there and socialize and have fun 🎉
I am attempting. Not as fulfilling as it used to be now that I am wiser,❣️
Dealing with other people is one of the hardest things to do in life.
To everyone that went through this hell, I wish all the love in the world. Please teach every one about narcisism.Peace!
Thank you and the same to you that was very kind of you. Keep on surviving and don't forget our lord listens and knows our pain, give it all to him. 🙏🏻
One of your best videos thank you 🙏🏻
I share with good people, always love on good folks 1st, narcs don't matter anymore!!😁
When you get to the point of they don't matter anymore you can heal and have peace
Exactly 💯💯💯💯💯💯
Once trapped by a narcissist , they control your emotions , your time and all of your decisions . They make you their toy and tool to use whenever they want.
We are not fools . We are people who have big hearts and faith in others and have no reason to distrust people we know .
We would make lousy soldiers because we care more about others than ourselves .
💯💯😌💪
Horrible indeed!
So we'll stated 👏👏👌
I have to say there are soldiers with very big hearts. They sacrifice their lives for others. Empaths are soldiers in a war like no other, I think. Be brave. God speed.
We care Too much
There's a sense of relief once we fully let go of people who are possessed by dark energy. It can be difficult to reach that point, but it is essential for our well being to get there. Thank you for all the empowering work you provide us, Andrew, always appreciated.
Welcome 💯🙏😌☀️
Well said!!!
True.. you either become devoured by the evil of people or remove yourself, heal, and become empowered
So generally Narcs are good looking people?
@peterhensler7930,
Yes. Or they put on a good show of charm or love, doing the love-bombing stage, stroking your ego. They move into sex fast to entice you that way too.
I don’t care about the Narcissist and I have Never been so happy in my life!!
You are such a die hard narcissist abuse defender! Thanks bro!!!
Welcome 😌🙏🙌
The narcissist slayer lol
He totally is!! 💯
a warrior ⭐
Tonight I went Christmas shopping with my daughters. We had such a blast laughing and being goofy. I forgot about the narcissist for most of the day…very little ruminating. It was such a relief to not think about him. I dreaded the ride home by myself fearing the slap-in-the-face return of the constant rumination. I concentrated on how grateful I am for my children and the fact that I could feel like myself again. Today was a good day. I pray everyday that he will fade from my mind. God help us all. It’s such a long road to recovery ❤
That is great that you got to be goofy and laugh. I found last summer that when I could laugh again, the ruminations disappeared. Best wishes on your healing path.
You will get there my friend. It is a long journey. But you will do it. Take everything to God in prayer. God bless
At some point there will be more good days than bad days.
Keep up with excellent self-care, as that is the key to healing. 💪🏻🌈🦄
Look like we did the same thing today I had to get out the house to go take my new grandbaby to take Santa Claus picture at the mall today I been feeling down send Thursday my kids daddy actually calling me to tell me he finally seen my ex-husband and his new supply after I told if he every seen th please do not confirm he actually have a new supply I already know because the brother told me in May telling what was going on I'm tired of these flying monkey tell me he good and smiling I had been crying the last two days still traumize over this reminisce over him what we did together 17years in this man life just over there in April then went on my cruise came back and got discarded. I had to get out the house to feel better and I did I had a good time my daughter and her baby daddy and the baby. I trying ro forget him listening to these podcast help me alot that these people don't change but change partner. I pray you keep healing and get back to what we all was happy with life❤
❤🙏
Can you believe these people are jealous of us? We wouldn't have ever thought!
💯💯💯
Not one person came to my help. People have no clue what this is. You have to do it yourself through God. Thank brother you are a wealth of knowledge. You are helping people!
🙏💯☀️
Most people do not understand unless they have been through it. Once you are out, your clarity returns and you see how destructive narcissists have been.
100 percent true
I went thru 10 years wa narc….. when I met him I was an innocent, when I finally left, I was a broken person. I am a survivor. Bruised and broken but I am alive~ 🎉
I am so happy for you. I wish you healing ❤❤❤
It is better to be alone than to be unsure
Great thought!
Absolutely!!
I was actually able to take a nap today, no Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde kicking or shaking me awake and berating me... aaand, the rain clouds rowed away, and the sky is blue and the sun is shining 😊 I am glad you made it too Andrew... because you have made a difference in my healing journey🫶✌️ 😊
☀️😊❤️
You have brought me to tears of happiness!!!
They will only have this abusive dualistic approach behaviour until they get you where they want you to be.
@georgea1706 Yeah, and in this particular case, he wanted me dead. God provided me with a way to escape...praise God 🙏
@@ERnarcfree 😊
Broken with no glue left,they do not love I loved but he never did
Just now starting to feel better after 20 yr marriage to a covert narcissist,flying monkeys my daughter,my sister ,all his side of family .been solely alone for 3 Christmases now. Lonely life but oh my goodness I got a lot of clarity,can’t believe these people existed thanks for your channel
Same here. I always rejoice when Christmas is over - it's a great relief. That and my birthday are the loneliest times.
Thats really powerful to read! Thanks for sharing.
@Martin-rh7mf God bless you, Martin!🌹
@Martin-rh7mf Good one, Martin. There's gifts there of a different sort. Hope you feel better soon.
@Martin-rh7mf A lot of people have been sick lately! I'm glad you are content and better than anticipated with the healing path!💪🏻
Andrew is saving lives every day!!! Help him by sharing these videos on your social networks!!!
@marylytle7888 Yes absolutely Yes. When you look at the comments most everyone is very kind, supportive, polite … share the videos. This is how the word gets out there -
It is difficult when you call these people your family for many years and if one of them was someone you gave birth to. But it must be done if you want to regain your mental and/or physical health. It took me a long time to stop crying and embrace and love myself more than those who were putting me down and hurting me. Thanks, Andrew. You are a great help. Wishing you all the best.
I'm still in the crying phase, feeling like a deer stuck in headlights.
I've been here before with leaving narcs in my life.. but this time it's my now ex covert narc mother..
This one is seriously affecting me 💔 I trusted her all my life. 47 years of illusion. 😢
@user-ro3rv4nw2n
Beautifully said... it's painful, but the only way to heal your soul, and find peace🕊.
I'm praying for all of you, struggling. But always remember, the Good Lord knows your true heart! He can help you... just ask 🤲, and open the door for him.
God bless you all 🙏.
@@c.a.5808 you are absolutely right. I am on my path with God, the highest power. it guides me and gives me strength. I am grateful for everything, my life, my peace and my heart. I would not trade with anyone. God bless, sending my love to you.
He hit me and made me cry on my birthday a few months ago. That was the last straw, I broke up with him. It's been a painful journey but every day I am more and more grateful that he's gone. Andrew you have helped me learn about NPD, I had no idea when I met and fell in love with him. Instead of wallowing in self-pity, I now spend my time looking at each piece of me that made me an attractive supply to him. Reconciling the broken parts, the old wounds, has been tough but necessary. Thank you so much for these videos, they have been a lifesaver for me.
My heart goes out to you for what happened on your birthday. Every birthday, I went through grief & sorrow. They ruin everything that's special for US.
🤗🙏
@@jesusitrustinyou6900 Thank you for the kind words and the same for you. I wish you, healing, hope and peace.
❤ I'm so glad you are now free. Take care of yourself. And never never never never never go back.🎉❤
These dark relationships do change you. I no longer care one way or the other what happens to him, but I’m much more cynical and wary of people now and I don’t like being this way. In the long run that experience may protect me from future abuse, but I feel like he stole a piece of me I’ll never get back.
💯💯😌
There really should be a mandatory course in high school to teach people about narcissism! How many tears could be spared?!
A covert narc former "friend" now is hoovering and trying to suck me back in. I've got a great tactic if we come across each other in the neighborhood or in town. As soon as he starts speaking, I lift my arm and stare at my watch while he's speaking for about 5 seconds. Then I say "Gotta Run!" and walk away while he's still speaking. Trust me, he deserves it. Other times I forego the watch action and just keep walking and wave "bye bye" while he tries to hoover. I'm at the point of having fun with it.
💯💯🙌
What a great feeling 🙏🏾 I hope anyone struggling get there.9months out
😌🙏🙌
Stay out my friend, l made the mistake to go back. What a mistake that has proven to be….😢
Thank you for describing when “no one is in your corner “. Wow! That hit home . Blows my mind but I’m stronger for it. Getting stronger everyday . Really appreciate how you give details of abuse /survivorship . I appreciate your work ….. Ann
Welcome 😌🙏🙌
I so sad that you had to go through that - I hope you are okay now.
Ann I know how you feel. It’s been a 18 months and I feel free even if I am not divorced to him.
Here on this site you will get support and real caring from people you never met. Stay strong!!!
I am so sorry you felt nobody was in your corner! The community here is in your corner!
When no one is in our corner, we towel ourselves up and come out to box stronger ❤👊🏽
This is exactly where I find myself now - stuck in a narcisstic relationship with my husband and two kids who have all turned against me (thanks to my narcisstic husband). He brainwashed them over a period of years and now they play mean and wicked narcisstic games on me. They know I won't last long - they know I am an empath. It's all a sinister plan to get rid of me ... forever!
The ex wife turned our oldest daughter against me. Parent Alienation. The oldest daughter is just like her mother now, hateful and vindictive. I quietly walked away. There is peace and drama free atmosphere with me. Life goes on. I am tired of dealing with toxic creatures.
It’s so easy to get trapped with these people. It’s total torture. So evil. I feel bad for anyone caught in the trap or born to it. 👊✊👊
😌😌🙏
I realized today that he don’t matter at all anymore when I didn’t care to respond to his messages or even read it. I have peace and I can get a good nights rest.
I was actually thinking about this earlier today at work, how certain people really don't matter to me anymore. I can love them from afar, but not really like them much. The few I really trust and have been there and continue to be there, is all that's important. Small circle, happy life! Sending love, light and virtual hugs to you and all! ❤️✨️🤗
💯💯😌🙏
Agreed. I love from afar and will pray as led but will not allow shame and other toxicity.
I don't understand how one can love but not like. I no longer love most of my toxic family and find it completely alien to imagine that I could love them, close up or afar.
@LyndaHill that's totally understandable. When I speak of love them, I'm speaking from a universal perspective of loving everyone, which is how I view humanity will evolve into. Until then, I can love everyone, but not necessarily like their actions or lack of integrity, thus boundaries must be set to keep them away from my energy. There were times in the past where I found myself spewing nasty things and feeling very low and angry toward toxic individuals. All that did was set me into a spiral of self destruction. And, yes it still rears its ugly head at times. That being said, I make a conscious choice each day whether to hold on to that low state of being, or move forward into the light.
@sherrywayne444 Thanks for your thoughtful reply. I'm definitely not wishing ill on anyone but don't have space in my heart for these people any more. And that includes my grown children. I can barely believe that I'm writing this, although it's been over four years since any communications with any of them. Toxic families are a real trip, even as I'm an extremely loyal person, to be treated the way they treated me means for me that they won't ever have a seat at my table. It really only took one malignant narc to blow the entire thing up. Anyways, thank you and best wishes.
I absolutely understand the dark night of the soul and wondered if you had also descended into that depth of suffering. It’s a place from which many don’t return, but if you persevere, it leads to profound understanding. Your awareness opens up after the death of your ego. I’m so glad you survived and transcended your suffering.
It’s worse than death
I call this the "Black Room."
The new birth for christians
My friend, one person's discard is another person's treasure find!
😌😌
For the first time, and I'm 61, I am not attending family gatherings for the holidays. I skipped Thanksgiving, had a good time by myself, and I'm looking forward to being on my own for Yule as well. Thank you for the video, Andrew! ❤
Good deal🎉. Me too. I’m spending time enjoying my life now and getting better everyday. I’m so grateful to “The Most High. 😊❤
@@Lillian-z7c 👍 and Mothers Day is fast approaching but the narc stepmom gets zero from this girl! 😁
Even though you are in the clear physically and emotionally from these "energy stealers/drainers" and can now say to yourself "Wow, they actually dont matter to me no more", be aware still and never fully forget those horrible experiences and confirm to yourself that the person who was responsible for all that heartache was trash, and you got rid of and took out that trash yesterday and nobody ever cares or looks back at yesterday's trash. Stay wise and strong healed ones and wish you forever peace.
😌😌🙏
I needed this today! ❤
I still love my 93 year old mom and sister. Just need help to be brutally honest with myself.
Keep my distance.
😌😌🙏
That's the great truth. Be proud of yourself 😊
You love them freely but love yourself the most ❤🌈
Big hug to you 🤗
@@rubyjet9513 thank you 🙏 so much!!!! Hugs 🤗 🥰🥰🥰🙏🙌🙌🙌🌻🌻🌻💕💕💕💕💕😘😘😘
@@rturney6376 🌹❤️
The opposite of love is not hate, it is indifference.
👍💯✔💪🙏
I’m sorry Andrew to hear how it went down. You are a Light for so many!!!
☀️❤️🙏
I get really mad thinking about how Andrew was treated!🤬
you are so right Andrew, my Husband the Narcissist thought he “had me” so brain washed that he had full control of me and that he could mentally abuse and misuse me for my entire life. Although he has not lived in the same house (he’s in Assisted Living with Alzheimers) with me for 2 1/2 years, Andrew your videos provide so much information you have been able to open my eyes to some things the Narcissist (and his Flying Monkeys) did that I hadn’t realized what was done to me during this 54 yrs of marriage.
Almost 3 years post narc. No contact. I went thru dark night of the soul. Narc soooo doesn't mean anything to me. All the flying Monkees r out of heart mind, and soul. It will take a lot of work!!!!!
Wow three years with no contact. I’m proud of you. Dark night of the soul…. it hurts soooo bad. I know. I’m three months out. I have no contact. I’m just trying to be good to myself. And then I can be good for those around me. I hope your life is going the way you want.
I realized he didn't matter anymore the day he ended the relationship. I had been looking for a safe way out and he provided it that day.
What i hate the Most is my own behavior Not what they did or do. It is what i did and do that dont resonate with my deepest self. I cant and i wont say i dont Care about them but i have distance to them and will keep it that way.
😌😌🙏
One last thing...
It is my turn to help other people recover and move on from narc relationships.
5 women have to come to me over the last year of my hard study of narcissim. And now it is my turn to HELP THEM.
As so many others helped me survive this last year.
This world is give and recieve ..
We just have to learn to be decerning and act on it with clear boundaries.
There are good people in this world!
We must stay open to receive the blessings.
That is the one thing i refused to let the demon narcs take from me.
Real loving relationships.
Sometimes its been so long without the flying monkeys left in the wake of my total disregarded ex, that I ll say Im an only child. When people I see out ask about my siblings I have to think if I really have any . Its so much better this way.
There is NO WAY, I or ANY of YOU should LOVE anyone that WOULD DO THESE THINGS to me, you... Narcs DO NOT DESERVE " ANY LOVE " from us, PERIOD
😌😌🙏
This is time consuming but worthwhile and you are correct - forever changed. Boundaries are not wiggly anymore, it's stressful to be that way, at first. Then, the new you decides that feels good to have respect again. So take your time to get to know yourself again, and your opinion matters. Your voice matters. You can come a long way giving yourself the time, care and attention you freely gave away to the ungrateful. Never again ❤
When I finally realized that none of us really mattered to her. My momster tried to destroy her entire family. She’s got no one left.
This gentleman has been thoughtful enough to share some very important information in how to navigate in a world filled with narcissistic types. It can be stunning and at times overwhelming to discover just how many people are like this.Over my lifetime I have found that narcissists are fundamentality very weak people who need to control others and make them feel less than in order to maintain power or dominance. Over time these people can and will inflict severe emotional damage that, if left unchecked, can negatively impact one's life. Escaping free from this is like walking from darkness into sunshine.
😌😌🙏
After my mother died I obtained her medical records from her doctor. The doctor had written that my mother had gone to see him with depression, and one of the reasons she gave for her depression was that “her children were failures “. You reminded me of that when you said you don’t want to drive 6 hours at Christmas just to be criticised.
Being discarded was your biggest blessing
I am so sorry Andrew that no one checked if your ok. I know how you felt i was isolated too and it is so lonely and the narc kicks you at your worst moment. Your such kind person with a good pure heart ❤
try turning off your phone for 1 week. see who comes looking for you 😢❤
Andrew is talking about real freedom!!!! Real freedom is we get to decide what we want in our lives.
My soon to be ex of 27 years is a few blocks away ( he picked the place) and I have zero idea where he is and who he is with. I have no hatred towards him. You can’t hate the “ wall” , you can’t hate “ the rocks in your yard”. You can’t hate someone whom will never ever understand what he is and what he did.
Hatred eats you up alive.
The best way to channel your sadness, your sorrow, your pain, your anger and your loss of your dream is to be happy away from the source of misery that use to be in your life.
I walked around all day thinking how happy I am to be alive and away from the Narcissist.
God Bless you Andrew and God Bless this wonderful community of caring people who watch your channel.
Real freedom is "LISTENING TO ALL, BELIEVING IN JUST ONE, AND FOLLOWING NO ONE" Blessings to you! ❤❤
@@lourdesecheverria6209 You are very wise. I now listen to only people I choose to listen and I hold back believing until I can verify.
God Bless you also. Your name sounds like maybe I can say “ Obrigada”??
Have a great night.
@@ERnarcfree ♥🙏
I used to Hate. Through the years, it was clear, it was totally wasted thoughts and emotional energy ... ( honestly ) I read at least a half a dozen people I Hated, in the Obits. It was a stunner and the question was: ""Now, where do I put all this hatred I had for these creeps??" Oddly, I learned to hate no one. I just avoid people that rub me the wrong way like the Plague. And Andrew's wisdom and info helps me spot 'em quicker.
@@jhavajoe3792 Good idea. Hating requires energy. When you read something inspiring you feel good and when you read something bad that a person did, it upsets you leaving you feeling down.
Holding on to hate affects nobody except the person who has those feelings. You don’t have to forgive- but you can let go.
Silence can say everything...a smile is the best slap in the face
😌😌
Nobody is knocking on my door.❣️
😢
@@emilywilson7308 not so bad...no abuse.❣️
"Emotional vampires" is quite accurate! I personally think NARCS are Sociopaths. I read an apt description of their mindset which really helped me:
"When love is a tool to be used to trap and manipulate someone, sociopaths can love." Unlike this community of REAL love & support, the physical pain (draining) of being abused takes a toll on your psyche. Don't expect an apology or closure. There are none. YOU HAVE to break the cycle yourself. Much love to all of you ❤
Patience is the best prayer. I have been out for 6 years now & interesting is, that I still meet these kinda people trying to approach me & we do learn how to handle them in a better way protecting ourselves. The rabbit hole trip teaches us to become sensitive to the lying cheating darker people. We can develop. We stay the cuddly maybe naiv rabbit, but now we are the bunny with a gun. Do not mess with us anymore. Go away & enjoy your messy life on your own. A lonely road. They underestimate us big time. Ty
Mom, sis, bro, n dad, REFUSED to have an adult to adult relationship w me. At 32, I began to put up boundaries, stand up for myself- and literally EVERYTHING EXPLODED. They began actively attempting to ruin my life and even in several occasions placed me in mortal danger. Been no contact nearly 5 years. Biggest bully, dad, has died. I felt RELIEF. Thanks for your important work, Andrew ❤
Welcome 🙏😌🙌
Same, I’m seeing a pattern with narcissistic tendencies towards Christians. We seem to be singled out and it mentions this many times in the Bible.
Now
Our mind is a garden
Our thoughts are the seeds,
We can grow flowers, or
We can grow weeds.
😉💯❤️
I love this poem! Did you write it?
My question is why did I fall so hard and take it? That is disturbing to me. Never again will someone treat me like this and me, take it. It’s more about me than her. I believed in something beautiful. She didn’t feel my idea of beautiful was the same. At least for a while I thought something was amazing. It was sooooo good. And now it’s soooo sad. I’m glad I had something that felt real for a little while. Maybe someday I’ll feel that again. If not, that’s okay too. At least I felt something amazing. And then I felt so awful and painful. It’s so confusing. I just want to give my best no matter what. I’m happy to learn and grow. My heart goes out to all of us who feel the deepest pain ever. Maybe great joy is ahead. At the very least, no more pain.
Thank you.
It is a massively positive thing when they do not matter to you any more. When you finally stop caring what they think or say. The path to healing was to go inwards and discover and understand everything we had been trough and find ways to heal our wounds . Thank you Andrew 😊 God bless you ❤❤❤
I don't understand how 5 months could go by and no one checked up on you to see if you were OK! 😢
I know… GØD it breaks my heart!!! 💔💔💔💔
@@jennifernewton4637
Me too!!!
The focus must be on yourselves/ourselves and in our "broken" hearts. NO one checking on you/me/us is not a shock to anyone who has been in a narcissistic relationship. Ii is a fact. The narc does NOT CARE. Blessings! ❤❤
It doesn't surprise me. It is very common for men to have very little to no support.
@@hydrostatic8048not surprising, but still, heartbreaking 😔💔
I look forward to seeing your videos as they are so helpful and giving me the clarity and knowledge to heal from 33 years of abuse. Thank you Andrew and I am so sorry that you were hurt too❤ Namaste
Namaste..😌🙏🙌
It's your universe, the narcissist is a reflection of your fear and insecurities, change your mind believe it , change the narcissist.
Remember they are sick people, damaged by the world.
I am back to my original self!!! Feels great..❤😂
That takes time but it's well worth it.
I’m looking forward to moving to a new city and meeting new folks. At 72 I’m still active in business and gym and who knows there may still be life in my life. Thank you Andrew for giving me a new perspective. I’ve been separated since 4 years and still healing
Welcome 💪☀️💯
Of all the horrors of the relationship, one of the most degrading and soul destroying for me was the public defamation on social media. It was their favorite weapon of choice and the hardest injustice to deal with.
Wow!😮
I can only guess how you knew about any Facebook posts. I hope you have gone through it and are done. It is always a good idea to tell friends and family that you do not want to hear anything that he is doing, who he is with, who he is doing what with where and when, or what he is saying about you. You can't control that and it is best to just not be informed about it at all.
I'm working towards healing from exposure to a narcissist son and daughter in law, i have cut all contact, because they make me physically ill. I will always love my son, but i don't like him, and i don't have to ether.
😌😌🙏
"La belle indifference" - is such a relief. Freedom!
💯💯😌
There is a great sense of freedom A relief that it's over They do not live rent free in your head anymore A new beginning
It’s 2:42 cst on 12/9/23. I have listened to all of your videos. They are all perfectly right on. Thank you very much! They have all helped me tremendously!
Welcome 🙌🙏❤️
You mentioned the phenomenon of the narc bringing up past shame and throwing it in your face. I heard a therapist say that they only want to recognize the version of you that they had the most control over, despite how much time has passed or how much you’ve changed. It’s one reason why, for instance, a narc mom will bring up dumb $hit you did in your teen years. You might be 40 with two kids and a mortgage, but mom treats you like a ‘dumb’ 16 year old. Why? She can’t control the 40 year old you in the way she could with the 16 year old version. I dunno if that tidbit will help anyone else, but hearing that was 🤯 for me. And if you’re young, reading this? It WONT change. Take action now. I’m 53, she’s 81 and the dynamic is the same. We’re LC and she doesn’t want to hear about my job or life, but she’ll bring up me getting bullied in middle school like it was yesterday.
@@barrys7515 you’re welcome😎 Yeah, when I first heard this, I thought about it for probably 3 days straight. I kept thinking about how she’ ll talk to me like I’m a teenager and expect me to respond like one. She’ll bring up old embarrassing stories from years ago and try to push my buttons. When I heard this theory, it all made so much sense.
That makes so much sense that they only want to recognize the version that they could control. That explains why they are stuck in fifty or sixty years ago and childhood. Thanks.
Made my own analogy years ago, before understanding Narcissism. I likened parents raising you in their funky ( sometimes ignorant) ways when you were a sapling. Not being with a depth of understanding of their children being individuals, self-cultivating of their own minds and spirit, those parents continued to use their old, cheap, rusty, worn out gardening tools and will do so to the end. Humans are often creatures of habit. Some are unchangeable.
The late musician Joseph Zawinul, who played with Miles Davis, quoted: "The Son sits on the
shoulders of the Father ( in your case Mother) and sees farther."
I am trying to get out of this relationship I hope after Christmas I will be free it won’t be easy but I no longer care. I just want to be free ❤
💯💯💪🙌
yes I'm finally done and as good as heald I believe it's been a eye opener but there narc abuse channels clarify everything
All so true, and the people in my life that are still willing to listen to my struggles just don't understand why i don't just leave. No one can possibly understand the hell you need to go thru to escape a narcissist unless you have been through it.
Keep on listening to andrew, read everything that you can, start making a plan, start setting up boundaries, look up The Grey Rock method to help you get through it. You absolutely must break free, these people can actually make you emotionally ill and even physically ill. I understand how hard it is to do it, but I can also tell you that I did do it, and so did many others, and you can do it too.
My life is so much better since I walked away 🙌
The key word punishment is real in physical,mental and spiritual ways. Once we process such actions on our lives and learn it will NEVER change, it is then that the narcissts no longer matter. What matters is one's inner healing. Peace will enter and the world is now light full of hills to climb , glory found on summits. These golden moments alone are worth more than gold and bring peace , a healing balm ❤
Thank You Andrew for helping me climb out of the pit I was thrown into. God bless you.
Snake pit!
So true, they are the broken ones. I was the scapegoat and I left all of them more than a decade ago. Now I see clearly that I am the healthy one.
You are so beautiful inside and out. Thank you for this message. Spent some time reflecting today with a woman who stepped into my life post discard and for how aligned the synchronization is of your messages to my own life is I can simply say it must be God at work. Loved this video too. They don’t matter. It’s all let go. And I have peace 😌
I pray this peace for all still in the pain and struggle. Andrew we weren’t alone with you here ❤️🙏
Thank you for sharing 🙏🙌❤️
So sweet!❤
My last narc thought he was insulting me during my sleep, about 18 months after that it became glaringly obvious that my family were the first and most pressing problem, now I am free
Of both
@@louisemorgan3237 this is wonderful to hear you are FREE- of both toxic situations. 🙏💪❤️
I’m at this point now where this narcissist does not matter to me
Yeah your whole world implodes; it is like being in a deep dark hole that gradually (with a ton of emotional work, education, and effort) starts to get filled up. After months or years, one day you realize the hole has been filled and you are back on level ground where you can FINALLY walk away .. FOR GOOD!!! 😊
I’m filling my hole with positive energy. Some day I hope it keeps me grounded to a full filled life.
@@kevinpeasetennisprofession4905
Good idea!🎉
I really like you Andrew. I can tell you know what's up. I also had a horrible repulsive discard and my close family were cowards. My life was ruined and justice system weaponized against me. Its been a long hard road. I feel so much stronger but I don't know who is friend or foe. I still know I am being stalked. I have told so many so called professionals. The system is a joke. Just where I fell after the disgraceful discard.
😌😌💯
When I saw him with his new supply and felt nothing I knew it was over. Not a blip on my screen. I hope she has a good therapist was my first thought.
So true I was just an ATM.
😌😌💯
I'm now getting to the point where she doesn't matter anymore, it takes time but eventually will happen !
😌😌🙏
Father was a Malignant Monster that created sibling rivalry to divide. Haven’t associated w/sibling in over two decades. Who divorced her husband and is no longer in any cont with her, Own child! A Mother that was a Covert, an a enabler. She betrayed, her children to procure her, Own safety! After the discovery of a Lifetime, of Family secrets? I terminated contact w/Father a decade+ ago! An waited 5yrs to exact revenge upon Mother. Who embraced another abusive addict Narc after divorcing the Malignant Narc. Which, as Fate would have? Victimized her yet, Again! These people were Never Family! I’ve created my Own & flourished. Beautiful wife & daughter, I was told I’d never have.
Thank you for this message.
My life has changed for the better. ❤
Welcome 😌🙏🙌
I have a narcissist son that put me through torture for years and years and when I was laying dying in the hospital and the minister called him he called back. He says I don't think I want to talk to her. Because I don't get along with my mother.
Thank you so much for your kindness.
When I asked Father to lead me to someone who would help me understand Your video popped up. Didnt know about narcissist. Thanks for the knowledge. Finally the devorce is final. Nothing left but my mind is free. The wounds are healing. And despite all their attempts I am alive. I'm sure that one pisses them off. Especially after canceling my life insurance.
When I found out my wife was cheating with a single mother with two children, she called her, “some bitch,” and criticized me for having empathy for her. As upset as I was about the lying and cheating, what bothered me most was that she didn’t care about lying to this other person at all. My dad taught me that when you hear someone talking bad about someone behind their back, they are doing the same regarding you when you’re not around. I saw the total lack of empathy toward the two children she took out to dinner (with my $$$) and took on fishing trips as her victims. When we were packing to leave the state she had two mini fishing vests in her car and told me to throw them out. To me it was a tragedy. The fact I ever consider myself missing this person is intolerable. But it’s a sign of my love and compassion for others and not a weakness as she considered it to be.
Seems like bisexuality/ homosexuality is a common thing for nacs: they don't have a core, they don't have a type, they pursue everyone and anyone 🤔
What is every bit as freeing as well is that now I know I never mattered to them either. I understand that I have no obligation to them or their flying monkees. Onward with a much lighter sense of direction. 😊
My "spidey sense" is strong and protective too!
Andrew and subs on this beautiful channel, God bless and keep you! ❤
☀️🙌💯
Thank you, JB!❤
A wonderful and liberating feeling! Thanks to my therapist and me working on myself. I am in a place I honestly didn’t know existed!!
Andrew you are an Angel Thankyou so much
The two siblings and their families don't matter anymore. I do still love them, but I leave them to their own lives and pitfalls. One would think that if I went through last year with my adult son who also went through the legal letters and rage fits, it would have been easier. In truth, we had a very rough year during 2022. It was far worse than losing my husband of 46 years in 2021, and almost losing my house and business to a 180,000 acre fire around my canyon, evacuating for six days, and then massive flooding. No, the two siblings tried to take us out starting with my Mom's death bed in 2022. A year ago, was truly terrible for both of us. The best thing was that we were good cheerleaders to each other, and we are thriving this December. We have grown so much. We've had isolated lives since April 1, 2021. We're both on the healing path. Never could have planned the crazy happenings.
Kathleen, so glad you are doing better!
🎉🌹🦄
@@emilywilson7308 Thank, Emily. So glad you are too.
Many men and women spend their whole lives getting over dysfunctional upbringings...ADHD can complicate relationships...My hope is that those who are hurting, will get the help they need, heal, and learn to love completely. Thanks.
💯💯🙏😌
I am so glad I found your channel this morning. I have been a people pleaser, always wanted everyone to like me. I have been used and through the years I have disconnected with many people as I have seen through them, sometimes feeling guilty about it. Your video shows me what I have done is healthy behavior. I will continue to be me, be empathetic, and be loving, but to those who deserve it. THANK YOU.
My family is a nest of snakes. My father was receiving sadistic pleasure by humiliating me and saying things like: are you loser? Are you a loser? He did it secretly and smiled seeing my pain. My mother was screaming at me and they both called me ugly. They played victims and were beating each other, I had to keep saving them. They are horrible people and the other relatives in my family. Sometimes the ones who are close to you are your biggest enemies, and Bible said that too. Thank you so much, Andrew.
Welcome 💯🙏😌
exactly. Thank you. Huge HUGZ!!
I have average or mild empathy (not above average). I reserve it for those that deserve it, never for people that are among the dark triad or tedrad types.
💯💯😌
The one thing I’ve heard nothing about , when your adult children are flying monkeys, some being diagnosed with narcissism, and your ex is a psychopath, narcissist and you see all the disorders of , and all the various things that accompany this cluster. Yes, you had to cut ties with your own adult children.
💯💯😌