As I said in the video, I think it's sad that we often view introversion as inferior to extraversion. You don't need to change your whole personality! Most people are both anyway, it's context-dependent. However, in a world that's just one big human network, people skills help 😌 I hope this video helps someone like it would've helped me!! and check out the 36 Qs to fall in love!
I really like learning about MBTI and cognitive functions, because it's enabled me to pinpoint my weaknesses and talk to similar-minded people about how to overcome them. It's also so cool how it allows you to see how everyone perceives the world differently. I feel like you'd really like learning about the different types, too! Haha I'm wayyy too obsessed with it, though.
Jacket Potato same here, I can’t help but try and analyse everyone I know to see which type they are .. I’m and INFP, what about you (Actually I’m gonna take a guess and say you are INFJ 😂)
Everyone has this mindset that introverts are always shy and quiet but it just depends on who you are with and sometimes it takes time to be comfortable around that person.
Recap: 1) stop over thinking. (just breath in and breath out and go for it, start that conversation) 2) listen 3) Questions (small talk vs meaningful) 4) talk to strangers (get out of ur comfort zone) 5)energy (listening, upligting people, smile)
One thing i’ll never understand is how i’m supposed to transition from small talk to an actual meaningful conversation. Like I love deep talks but how do i go from oh hi how’s your day to what’s your biggest fear?
gradually get deeper and deeper by giving slightly more personal info about the topic you are alreafdy talking about. (quote from a post) 'As you relate stories, ideas and experiences to one another, back and forth, you slowly make each of them more personal and vulnerable as you go along. - A first conversational chunk may be about your job and what you like to do. - A person responds with a story about their previous job and how much they didn’t like it. - You go a bit deeper by talking about how much you hate being stuck doing things you don’t like to do, that you have a bit of a rebellious streak in you. - They respond in how their brother is the same way. - You ask them how their relationship with their brother is, if they get along. - They answer and explain that yeah, for the most part they do, but it’s kind of complicated. - You tell them a brief history of your relationship with your siblings and how much it’s grown and changed over the years.' Another example is starting by talking about a football game, someone mentions how good it felt for the team to win as they have a lot of memories watching it w their dad, another says they never had that with anyone and werent close with their dad. They start talking about difficult relationships with family members (deep). You could go even further by saying your parents never got over you dropping out of school, sparking a conversation about pressure or what you really want in life and that you admire the other person for taking a risk to do what they love. Sorry for the long message :)
@@luca77681 hey i just read your comment and i wanted to tell you that you shouldn't be sorry for your long text. I actually really enjoyed reading it and it gave me a lot of insights how to shift smalltalk to a meaningfull conversation. Thank you! Also i appreciate the time you took to answer the person because it shows that you genuinly wanted to help them :)
something interesting I heard: focus on feelings not facts. For example, instead of asking what someone did on holiday, ask what they enjoyed the most, or found interesting, or if it was how they expected, or what they liked/ didnt like about the country etc. Ask about their emotions/ reflections not their actions
In my early teens I used to overthink social interactions so much! Especially with older teens/young adults. I think what really helped is when I realised that no-one thinks about you as much as you think about you. Everyone else is probably thinking about how they appear/come across too! No-one's got the time or energy to be dissecting everything you do, and I realised it was sort of self-absorbed of me to assume they did (but of course natural, no judgement). Plus, do you dissect what others do? No, so it's safe to say they're not dissecting what you do either. When I realised that, I stopped caring so much.
Being introvert doesn't mean being shy or no liking to talk with people, just mean that this interaction let introvert people really tired afterwards. Extrovert people can be shy and awkward but after talking to people, even if it's not the best conversation, let extrovert people extremely energetic. That's the difference.
@@infoana7871Okay, and? So what if embarrassed people are embarrassing. Are we going to call call them out for it and make them feel guilty for their situation? Embarrassment is bound to happen we aren’t all perfect human beings and will make a mistake once in a while.
@@yoonari9840 Pretty funny how you got that from my comment haha, especially with the context that it's a reply to the comment above. Anyway, thanks, I had forgotten about this youtuber, gonna see where she's at now
is it just me but when in public or schl im the shyest i can be especially when having to speak out, but with family and friends im super confident and crazy like super super crazy lol
This used to be me. But when I realised that everyone else is the same as you with similar life experience and knowledge, and the fact that when I leave school most of these people I will never see again, I stopped caring so much about what others think. Just be kind, be understanding and be yourself. It takes time, but with practice and the right mindset you can learn to enjoy putting yourself out there. A few sayings that have helped me are: “Act confident and no one will question you” and asking myself “what’s the worst that could happen? (Realistically - usually it’s slightly embarrassing yourself or not getting the desired answer you were hoping for. All of which are temporary and don’t change anything in the long run).
So true about asking workers how their day is - I used to work as a cashier and every time someone asked a simple “how’s your day?” was such a nice change to the usual transactional script! It did make my day sometimes! ☺️
You’re completely right. It had never occurred to me that no one is naturally confident. I decided to like ‘fake it until I made it’, but it did work. I realised no one knew what was going on in my head, if I decided to ‘pretend’ to be confident, I really just was and it felt more natural over time
Theres a book I read recently, "how to be yourself" by Ellen hendriksen. She covers all of the thing mentioned in this video, and a lot more. It focuses more on social anxiety, but it also helps for people who are just generally shy. It was SO good, it really does arm you with a bunch of tools to push against shyness. I'd absolutely recommend reading it.
I’m such a big overthinker but I really try and stop myself and notice when I’m overthinking and I’ve found it helps so much, I ALWAYS think afterwards ‘why was I worried about that’ and instead of thinking after I now think ‘why am I even worried about this’
It happens to me sometimes, kind of randomly as well which doesn't make things better lol but what I usually do is just keep on going as if nothing happened, as Jade said you create the awkwardness so if you act like everything's alright then people will act like that too ! And if someone comments on it (i don't like it when that happens lol), i'd say humour is the greatest defense of all times ;-)
That used to happen to me for so many years. It was horrible tbh, I felt so anxious and just overall really shitty about myself. Over time I gained confidence and I learned to ignore it although it's easier said than done. It's been about a year now since I stopped blushing/flushing, so I can promise you it does get better. I know this is something I definitely needed to hear when I was going through it, but it will end!!
Same. I’m definitely confident when talking to others and can be funny if I say so myself, but generally I prefer spending time by myself. I love learning about random stuff more than talking to others. However, I get super happy talking to super intelligent people about super philosophical ideas. So maybe I just haven’t met the right people
I'm so introvert...i struggle a lot interacting with people. But actually when i find someone who can listen to me and not force me...nobody can stop me from talking😂😂 Btw a small youtuber here
practice. I also have social anxiety and the only way to get rid of it is to do the opposite of what your brain is telling you. If your brain tells you to run away from the situation, just face it.
I am diagnosed with social anxiety disorder but have gotten a lot better in social situations just with practice. Social anxiety definitely makes it harder, but not impossible. Medications and therapy really do work when you have the right ones. Getting in the mindset that you physically can’t execute conversations just because you have social anxiety is just making the case worse. As with many mental illnesses, you have to want to get better before you actually can.
I'm also diagnosed with social anxiety and I can't stress enough how helpfull therapy is. If it's too expencive to seek out a therapist there's really good workbooks out there that can act in the same way therapy does, with the addition being you doing the work alone. A year ago I suffered badly from this disorder, to a point where I barely left my appartment and felt like life was unbearable. Now I can socialise just like anyone else, feeling confident and safe in my own skin, feeling good in new situations and with new people... It takes hard work to get there but if I could do it so can you, and everyone else reading this
@@nowayjose6333 hello!! i was wondering what were some of the symptoms/what made you figure out you may have social anxiety before your diagnosis if you wouldnt mind saying? (im currently struggling quite a bit with my mental health and wondering if i perhaps have social anxiety.)
I’ve got a problem though - whenever i’m in a social situation i can never think of what to say next like i just have no ideas. E.g. if i did start asking the cashier “hows your day going” and they replied with something like “not very well” then i wouldn’t really know what to say and i feel like i would make it awkward and just make them feel worse. I would probably make it look like i thought i was superior to them but actually i just can’t make myself seem genuine 😔 or maybe that’s all in my head?? (this video was so helpful btw xxx)
I completely get what you’re saying! I find that in situations like this, saying what you think should be said (or the first thing that comes to mind) is the best answer you can give, even if it feels unnatural. Like if someone says “My day’s been horrible” then the answer I think that person would want to hear is something like “Oh gosh, I’m really sorry to hear that! I hope it gets better!” Even though I wouldn’t normally say things like this it does work and can brighten someone’s day! It does take practice as well but after a while it just becomes second nature 😉
I completely relate to that! But I am trying my best and force me a little to just say what I think, maybe it won't come out exactly how I want to at first but with time it will get better, and I think it just makes you realize you're too much into your own head and that people outside don't scrutinize everything you say (as you do instead) ❤️ Let's keep trying, what do we have to loose? Hope you're having a wonderful day ✨
Extroversion is definitely more appreciated in society than introversion. I live in Greece and when I tell certain people (like my mom) that I enjoy doing things on my own, like go for long walks by myself, or I don't want to leave my house every day, it blows their little mind off, like it's something unnatural and I am weird, and for 18 years of my life I actually believed that there was something wrong with me. So I became a psychology student to figure out what's wrong with me, and realised that I'm just really cool. Social skills are obviously crucial, and I've trained very hard to acquire them, but if I spend 24/7 with people for a period of time like when traveling, my fomo on the forefront and trying to make the most out of it (which kinda makes people think I'm the most extroverted person on earth), I legit need to sleep for like 2 whole days to recover. Then at times, when I spend too long inside my comfort zone in my house without really interacting with people, I genuinely feel I'm forgetting how to function and it makes me really anxious for the next time I am around people, and need a lot of time to mentally prepare to meet people again. I think I'm thriving when I'm consistently interacting with people, but having enough time for my self to recharge, instead of doing it "in bulks". And yeah if I'm spending one on one time with anyone, 36 questions to fall in love are always there to make up for any lack of communication skills.
I usually don't write comments, but it's sooo relatable! I thought that I am the only one like this, who has love and let's say "hate" relationship with people :D I like being alone, but after some time without interacting I start to feel so miserable and sad.. And it's even harder when you don't have friends ;(
I love this comment, it’s really relatable to me. I have always felt more introverted and calmer by myself. My friends would always want to go out after a long stressful school week to “finally relax” I never understood that. Whenever I have a long day all I can think about it having alone time. My parents would always make me feel bad for it, they always make seem like people who are introverted are hermits, but just because our brains act different doesn’t mean we should try to change them.
Yes, I'm exactly the same! I feel tired for days after spending too much time with people without recharging, but also, when I isolate myself for too long, I forget how to interact with others.
you didn't make the distinction between 'thinking ahead' and 'overthinking'. The definition of overthinking is thinking over something more than you should. Planning ahead is what you just described. When you think ahead about what you are going to say is perfectly fine and if it will leave you with no awkward silence, then all the better!
Adding onto small-talk with strangers: compliments!! If you like their jacket, say it. If their nails have a pretty design, smile andtell them you like it! It's only 2-3 sentences, and it'll make your day brighter, as well as theirs! :))
i act like an introvert around my friends that I don’t know very well, but when I’m with my close friends, i act like an extrovert. i wish that I could always act like that because I feel like I’d be able to make so many more friends that way
i really hate when people think that being an introvert = being socially awkward and unable to go out and have some fun. you can be really talkative and social but still be an introvert. being an introvert just means that when you’re around a lot of people for too long, your energy drains and you have to take a break to “recharge”. that’s literally it.
I used to be so confident and loud and all that but one day, I was giving a speech and loads of people started teasing about how I was speaking and how I was moving my hands and ever since then I've been so scared to speak and shy. So all I'm gonna say I know it might seem funny or might not seem like a lot but please, don't tease and laugh at people like that because it can do a lot more damage to someone than you think.
It’s funny how Jade felt insecure about being a “nerd” in school but at the same time watching her videos at that time made me feel more comfortable in my own skin at school and helped me own being a nerd💖💖
I'm currently working at McDonald's and I love it when people as me how my day is! It happens so rarely, a woman asked me one day and she genuinely cared and I'd had a crap day that day and it made me feel so much better
Book recommendation 📚 "Sorry I'm late, I didn't want to come" About an introvert who extroverts (is that a verb) for a year as a social experiment. This book is being passed around my friends group and everyone loves it ❤️
One thing that helped me was imagining I was an interviewer. So asking questions and letting other people talk while also steering the conversation if need be. Watch talk shows and see how the hosts carry the conversation, it helps so much.
I feel so greatful because I find you on social media. In all these toxic things on this platform you making me so inspired about life and motivated about things I wanna achieve. Thank you so much for being you and make me wanna be me
that last bit about the zoom calls, is EXACTLY how I feel... I had a pretty tough last term of school and I thought that's what was making me kind of nervous/ less social and extroverted- that's what made me click on the video in the first place! now I realize that, like Jade, I just really prefer being around people in a physical atmosphere.. THANKS JADE
I have to remind myself so often that I actually can do whatever I want (within legal and ethical limits of course) and it always blows my mind. I moved out from home last year and sometimes I just forget that I am allowed to live by my one rules. Sometimes it's the small things like having chocolate for lunch or just walking through the rain. It's quite amazing the amount of freedom that is just waiting for me.
I’m starting a new job tomorrow and I’ve been feeling super nervous, so this has really helped me. I’m going to try to focus on feeling less anxious about what people think of me. Thanks!
Just to get this off my chest. My parents are disappointed that I'm really shy and have social anxiety. They yell at me that I need to talk more especially to adults better. They have my older sister that graduate a year ago that "doing" so well with money talking with adults. My older brother is not doing really in school but is getting along with talking a bit outside my home. And theirs me, want to just talk on the internet enjoy myself but hate peoples, can't talk too much without coughing or looking at something. I get compared to my siblings and my classmates peers that it's brings down my motivation more. Also what I experience when I was young in school. 1st grade I was harassed and judge by my teacher, 2nd grade everyone bullied me and judge me of my weight and my hair. 4th grade my brothers teacher judge me on how to speak louder and stop being a wimp. 8th grade I was rejected and the guy I like people may have told his friends that they judge me. And here I am onto 11th grade after this summer break. I'm scared of adults not giving me time to slow speak out and just yell at me. All the adults loves yelling when I live and this village does have their own language and people are even more disappointed I can't speak and understand my "language" My parents are ashamed that I don't want to live where I live current and want to move to Texas Everyone know everyone in my hometown but as of someone that watches anime, does digital drawing, and hates my home's culture. I'm just cursed now. All this lead to depression of course and my mom only know but she doesn't care anything. Last year December, was when she find out I have depression. She yelled at me to never go to a doctor for help but now I was giving pills for this and she first started to care about me more. But she stopped and started the yelling again. This is my life but I don't want it to be it anymore. I want to be gone Thanks for coming to my TedTalk..(a little joke aside)
@E v e a bit better now, the yelling is still around and more argument happens. But I haven't felt really sad lately. Sometimes I have a hard time talking that if someone yells at me, I tried not to argue back without tearing up.
im 13 and in grade 8 , this april ill be goin to grade 9 like this whole year i have just wasted by being awkward like i rlly rlly rlly want to just socialise but like at the moment i just dont know what to say or ask like i watched a few of these type of vids but like i rlly just dont know at the moment this video brought a lil bit tears in my eyes , it just didnt fall off i hope this vid will help me in the live moment
This video is very helpful. I really needed it now as a quiet individual my whole life I will be starting uni this September and am such a awkward person to speak to. This year I'm challenging myself to speak and gain friends ( which I don't have now just because I push away people due to my introversion) Thanks for your videos they have been so empowering and helpful through lockdown. 🖤💛
i love how you took the time to reflect on how society values introversion less compared to extraversion. i'd probably consider myself to be an "extraverted introvert" in that at heart i do need my alone time to recharge and i do value it a lot, however i also love to be around people and be social which is something i've developed and worked on a lot more in the last few years
since I started asking baristas about their upbringing I no longer need to take diazepam. thanks jade, this was the best ad for uni accomodation i have ever seen
On the last point you made about asking your friends how they are FEELING: my friends and I have regular ‘check ups’ on our group chat. Every once in a while, one of us will ask “how have you been this week? Everyone feeling okay? Anyone need to chat?” It makes us all feel so valid and comfortable with each-other. Sometimes I will say oh actually I’ve had a rough week and then we will cheer each-other up and be stupid. Having healthy friendships especially now has helped so much.
so trueee!! i still think I am mainly an introvert but when I hang out with the right people I am totally extroverted and I love making new friends and making people laugh. The key is to hype yourself up and see your attributes instead of your flaws. I used to think so low of myself and I now I want to punch the past "me" for thinking that way, lol. side note: SHE'S GORGEOUS.
This week, I came back to school and I've started asking this one question that actually people seem surprised to hear but that I think is pretty basic: what do you do for fun? I have forced myself to ask and talk about the experience with others as well and, let me say, the doors this has opened to getting to know people has been shocking. It's not just "what's your name" "where are you from" or "what's your major", it's about the things they do just for themselves, even when no one is watching. I highly recommend.
thank you so much for this video - I’ve felt exactly like this since lockdown, like my awkwardness and uncomfortable vibes has come back, like I’ve regressed. but I just keep reminding myself that if I adapted to social isolation in only a couple of weeks, I will soon adapt back to social life! we haven’t forgotten how to be comfortable around people, it’ll become natural quicker than we think. plus, a lotttt of people are in the same situation and will understand✨✨
One tip I have that I have been trying to work on is to try to talk to everyone like u would talk to ur family or whoever ur most comfortable with. I am very comfortable with my family so I try to talk to other people as if I am just talking to my family. Idk if this makes sense but hopefully it’s helpful to some :)))
I'm going to a new sixth form in September, without anyone that I know. The introvert in me is terrified and anxious, but equally I'm so excited to try and make new friends
I started at a sixth form where I knew no one last year, honestly on the first day just try to be friendly! There’ll be other people in the same position as you.
I've struggled a lot with being better at talking with people and more social so here is another tip - give yourself some grace. If you have an awkward conversation with someone don't carry that around with you. It's ok. Life is just experiences. Try again.
I just want to vent a little bit... I was naturally what you would call an "awkward" person. I used to overthink every single bloody thing I'd say, do and were, I never knew how body language worked, I was fidgety, I played with my hair/fingers and had trouble looking people in the eye. Over the years, I started to pay less attention and just be in the moment, you know, to go with the flow. I started risking more, talking more about my feelings and thoughts, and generally feeling myself. Depressive episodes come and go, but once you learn that nobody is perfect, you start appriciating imperfections way more. To anyone who is in a need of help, you are not alone, you need and deserve love, you deserve a good life and don't ever let anybody convince you otherwise.
I am an introvert, and it’s horrible. My best friend is an extroverted person and we often go like to camps or something like that in the summer, and she always gets along with people immediately. While I am to scared to even say hello, she makes friends and they like her and I don’t even like going there because it’s the same thing every time. I’m trying to get over that and start talking to people, and making friends, because it’s just such a difference if you are an introvert or an extrovert.
everytime i watch your video i feel like im talking to a disney princess who is teaching me the most beautiful things in life and how to be happy for real🪄💕
these were great tips! as someone who used to be painfully shy, but now i LOVE talking with people (the right people lol), my tip would be to center every conversation around something that interests both YOU and THEM. Jade touches on this in getting “deeper” in conversation, but to add on, you must be interested in the topic as well because if not, it will show. both you and the other person will not be engaged. when you continue to have conversations that fascinate you, and the connections that can come out of them, i think it makes interacting with people genuinely fun and being social is something you actually want to do!
I’ve been watching your videos for over 2 years after I found out about you while revising for my GCSEs. I remember binge watching your videos that have motivated me to try out the pomodoro technique, waking up at 5am (which before I found absolutely INSANE), and just try out different ways to prepare for my exams... I have now finished school and want to say a big THANK YOU for making such meaningful videos that can truly help people no matter what the topic is. And this video? It is the best one yet, keep it up Jade! xxx🌻
Pretend people are like characters in a movie, or a book you love, think how many layers they have to their character ! If you think you’re weird, I can trust you that everyone is way more weird and interesting just like you😂 turn the perspective and focus on them, it helps when you feel unconfident and in your head x
so I really needed this... i try to be confident then the social anxiety wins. thank you for sharing this and starting a conversation about this. to anyone reading this, I believe in you ♥️🥺✨
thank you for another wonderful video Jade! after five months of isolation and awkward interactions over zoom, i've had a bit of a social setback. this was very reassuring and came at the perfect time! hope everyone who sees this is having a good day!
I don't know how you do it but every single video is so on point. No matter how down or unmotivated I feel, you always manage to make me feel better. I am so grateful for your existence :)
@@ingibjorg395 it's going well thank you! I haven't really met a lot of new people because it's all been online, but going to a new place has helped bring out my confidence! ☺️
@@ingibjorg395 no I was just making everything seem worse than it was 😂 I'm training to be a paramedic so will definitely need to build up my confidence! But off to a good start 🙌
I really agree with what you say. One thing that annoyed me the most is that people always have prejudices about you. When I was in high school, I was the girl who always got the high grades and studied hard. In many peoples mind, it was not possible that the serious study girl also likes to go to a party or could have a social life. So they just don't ask or something and I would be disappointed and feel lonely. I know I'm not the most outgoing person, but when I know people really good and feel comfortable, I can be the most present and enthusiastic people in the room. So indeed there's not only introvert and extravert, but a lot of it is between those. Now with uni, I started during covid, so still don't know that many people and live at home by my parents, so again not really 'part of a group' or going to parties. Also there really is a drinking culture at uni, which just isn't my thing, but a lot of students don't understand that you can like a party without drinking tons of beer. What I want to say is that your videos inspire me for quite a few years now :) I really want to thank you for that, and it makes me happy how many likeminded people there are out there. I'm trying to go out of my comfortzone more often and I really want to start travelling too. I'm now going to study in Norwau for 5 months next semester and I'm so excited!! Also going to do a Lingoda course to improve and practice my English a bit beforehand :) So really thank you Jade and keep up the good work💕
There is a podcast musical about the 36 questions. It's called: 36 questions :) And Jonathan Groff is in it!!! So if you're curious, you can listen it at Spotify or you can just search for 36 questions the musical podcast.
I’ve always been shy and lacked confidence but in the last couple years I’ve become anxious which has manifested itself through nausea and being quite emotional about having to go out and socialise
Strange but relatable to the whole talking to strangers thing. I love when tourists ask me for help or advice. I find it like rewarding that the are taking local interest in where i live
this whole video reminds me of that one tiktok which say something along the lines of: "it's not a coincidence that people who were bullied in secondary school THRIVE at university... IT'S NOT A COINCIDENCE"
You know I always thought I was shy and insecure as a child and growing up (I'm not anymore), But I watched a couple of old videos and realized I acted the same way as I do now until I was 11-15 years old. Those where my dark age ( now 17). it's crazy to think that I was myself as a child and lost who I am in my early teen days.
I find this video so so helpful, compared to other “how to be more social”-videos this one has been… more practical? I feel hyped. And one tip I find so useful for meaningful conversations is to just share something you are vulnerable about, very often the person you are talking to cam relate and you can share and reflect together!
this was exactly a year ago but i saw the video for the first time today and it came at the perfect time. yesterday i cried myself to sleep because i called my best friend after talking to no one for a long time and i realized i was just so awkard and I felt so bad!! In a few days I'm going to a youth camp with a lot of strangers. I'm so scared, but I'll challenge myself and do my best. thank you jade
As I said in the video, I think it's sad that we often view introversion as inferior to extraversion. You don't need to change your whole personality! Most people are both anyway, it's context-dependent. However, in a world that's just one big human network, people skills help 😌 I hope this video helps someone like it would've helped me!! and check out the 36 Qs to fall in love!
Hi Jade!🤗
Could you make a reaction video from the channel Merciful Servant, they have amaizing stories about many topics!🤗
I've always wondered what your MBTI type is - I feel like it could be ENFJ, but I could be wrong.
I really like learning about MBTI and cognitive functions, because it's enabled me to pinpoint my weaknesses and talk to similar-minded people about how to overcome them. It's also so cool how it allows you to see how everyone perceives the world differently. I feel like you'd really like learning about the different types, too!
Haha I'm wayyy too obsessed with it, though.
Jacket Potato same here, I can’t help but try and analyse everyone I know to see which type they are .. I’m and INFP, what about you
(Actually I’m gonna take a guess and say you are INFJ 😂)
Koko Flop Aha I'm also an INFP, but good guess! :)
Everyone has this mindset that introverts are always shy and quiet but it just depends on who you are with and sometimes it takes time to be comfortable around that person.
Yup, people conflate Introversion with social ineptitude, and extroversion with sociability/aptitude.
Charlotte Cooper that’s so true. I always say that the people who are the quietest have the most to say
this is so true!
Yup people have so much misconceptions about introverts
yes! introversion isn't just being shy and quiet. im an introvert, but when im around my friends and the right people, i become more of an ambivert??
“Care about what other people think and you will always be their prisoner.”
― Lao Tzu
this is so cool, tks
that's beautiful
wow
That's so deep, definitely gonna use this
Yes
Recap:
1) stop over thinking. (just breath in and breath out and go for it, start that conversation)
2) listen
3) Questions (small talk vs meaningful)
4) talk to strangers (get out of ur comfort zone)
5)energy (listening, upligting people, smile)
Thanks
I'm too lazy to finish this video😂
Thank you for this
@@filmscançons i feel you 🥺
Thank you so much 😁
One thing i’ll never understand is how i’m supposed to transition from small talk to an actual meaningful conversation. Like I love deep talks but how do i go from oh hi how’s your day to what’s your biggest fear?
gradually get deeper and deeper by giving slightly more personal info about the topic you are alreafdy talking about. (quote from a post)
'As you relate stories, ideas and experiences to one another, back and forth, you slowly make each of them more personal and vulnerable as you go along.
- A first conversational chunk may be about your job and what you like to do.
- A person responds with a story about their previous job and how much they didn’t like it.
- You go a bit deeper by talking about how much you hate being stuck doing things you don’t like to do, that you have a bit of a rebellious streak in you.
- They respond in how their brother is the same way.
- You ask them how their relationship with their brother is, if they get along.
- They answer and explain that yeah, for the most part they do, but it’s kind of complicated.
- You tell them a brief history of your relationship with your siblings and how much it’s grown and changed over the years.'
Another example is starting by talking about a football game, someone mentions how good it felt for the team to win as they have a lot of memories watching it w their dad, another says they never had that with anyone and werent close with their dad. They start talking about difficult relationships with family members (deep). You could go even further by saying your parents never got over you dropping out of school, sparking a conversation about pressure or what you really want in life and that you admire the other person for taking a risk to do what they love. Sorry for the long message :)
@@luca77681 hey i just read your comment and i wanted to tell you that you shouldn't be sorry for your long text. I actually really enjoyed reading it and it gave me a lot of insights how to shift smalltalk to a meaningfull conversation. Thank you! Also i appreciate the time you took to answer the person because it shows that you genuinly wanted to help them :)
Laura R. No worries! I’ve struggled with this for years and only recently overcome it, so I wanted to share what I learnt :)
@@luca77681 thank you!💕 definetely gonna try this🥺 i've been struggling to have small talks and i've screenshoted this🤣😭👍🏻
Millie Owen-Jones WOW
something interesting I heard: focus on feelings not facts. For example, instead of asking what someone did on holiday, ask what they enjoyed the most, or found interesting, or if it was how they expected, or what they liked/ didnt like about the country etc. Ask about their emotions/ reflections not their actions
That’s a very good tip! Thank you for that... I haven’t actually thought to do this before, I’ll start trying this out
Millie Owen-Jones Great 👍
Millie Owen-Jones this is actually really helpful thank you!!
thanks for the tips!
I do this naturally
In my early teens I used to overthink social interactions so much! Especially with older teens/young adults. I think what really helped is when I realised that no-one thinks about you as much as you think about you. Everyone else is probably thinking about how they appear/come across too! No-one's got the time or energy to be dissecting everything you do, and I realised it was sort of self-absorbed of me to assume they did (but of course natural, no judgement). Plus, do you dissect what others do? No, so it's safe to say they're not dissecting what you do either. When I realised that, I stopped caring so much.
@@Impulsive_fool thanks☺️
Im an early teen..i like what you said...thank you
@@MilkyWay-vr7ku you're welcome☺️
@@Impulsive_foollol, i thought i m the only one who takes screenshots
Being introvert doesn't mean being shy or no liking to talk with people, just mean that this interaction let introvert people really tired afterwards. Extrovert people can be shy and awkward but after talking to people, even if it's not the best conversation, let extrovert people extremely energetic. That's the difference.
Yep. I feel like jade still doesn’t understand this distinction
While that's true, I feel like introverts are more shy than extroverts and extroverts are more outgoing than introverts
I agree with your point to an extent but shyness and introversion can be synchronous and it's more common for introverts to be shyer than extroverts.
@@adamlindeman523 just learnt a new word thx
Extroverts feel energetic after talking to people? Am i an extrovert??
I've always told myself and my friends that "it's only awkward, if u make it awkward". So I'm so happy to see that u think the same!!
A C C U R A T E
A friend of mine once told me "embarassed people are embarassing". I truly love how she casually said this and how true it is.
@@infoana7871Okay, and? So what if embarrassed people are embarrassing. Are we going to call call them out for it and make them feel guilty for their situation? Embarrassment is bound to happen we aren’t all perfect human beings and will make a mistake once in a while.
@@yoonari9840 Pretty funny how you got that from my comment haha, especially with the context that it's a reply to the comment above.
Anyway, thanks, I had forgotten about this youtuber, gonna see where she's at now
Confidence and being more comfortable around people is a very important skill, and this was a really nice & inspiring video Jade!
I never really thought of it as a skill, more a talent but wow. I soo want to do it
is it just me but when in public or schl im the shyest i can be especially when having to speak out, but with family and friends im super confident and crazy like super super crazy lol
Nope, it's just practice.
all quiet people are like that
Haha me2, but im trying to be more social at school after the summer
Me too!
This used to be me. But when I realised that everyone else is the same as you with similar life experience and knowledge, and the fact that when I leave school most of these people I will never see again, I stopped caring so much about what others think. Just be kind, be understanding and be yourself. It takes time, but with practice and the right mindset you can learn to enjoy putting yourself out there. A few sayings that have helped me are: “Act confident and no one will question you” and asking myself “what’s the worst that could happen? (Realistically - usually it’s slightly embarrassing yourself or not getting the desired answer you were hoping for. All of which are temporary and don’t change anything in the long run).
So true about asking workers how their day is - I used to work as a cashier and every time someone asked a simple “how’s your day?” was such a nice change to the usual transactional script! It did make my day sometimes! ☺️
This makes me so happy to know! it's always the little things which make a difference :)
What if you have like 2items xD ummm
Was it someone you saw often or just a stranger shopping?
You’re completely right. It had never occurred to me that no one is naturally confident. I decided to like ‘fake it until I made it’, but it did work. I realised no one knew what was going on in my head, if I decided to ‘pretend’ to be confident, I really just was and it felt more natural over time
Yeah.... The ' Fake it till u make it ' really works... It feels more natural after sometime.
Lol so how exactly do we do if tho x
Theres a book I read recently, "how to be yourself" by Ellen hendriksen. She covers all of the thing mentioned in this video, and a lot more. It focuses more on social anxiety, but it also helps for people who are just generally shy. It was SO good, it really does arm you with a bunch of tools to push against shyness. I'd absolutely recommend reading it.
I read that too, and it completely changed my social skills. I felt so much more confident and extroverted after reading it. Honestly 10/10
@@kailey3396 I'm glad you agree!
After reading your comments I think I'm actually gonna buy it
@@lise7158 I dont do it justice, it's better than I could probably ever explain! I hope you like it!!
Lise i hope you enjoy it😁
I’m such a big overthinker but I really try and stop myself and notice when I’m overthinking and I’ve found it helps so much, I ALWAYS think afterwards ‘why was I worried about that’ and instead of thinking after I now think ‘why am I even worried about this’
Does anyone else go bright red in the face when someone talks to them? I need more confidence! 😭❤️
It happens to me sometimes, kind of randomly as well which doesn't make things better lol but what I usually do is just keep on going as if nothing happened, as Jade said you create the awkwardness so if you act like everything's alright then people will act like that too ! And if someone comments on it (i don't like it when that happens lol), i'd say humour is the greatest defense of all times ;-)
That used to happen to me for so many years. It was horrible tbh, I felt so anxious and just overall really shitty about myself. Over time I gained confidence and I learned to ignore it although it's easier said than done. It's been about a year now since I stopped blushing/flushing, so I can promise you it does get better. I know this is something I definitely needed to hear when I was going through it, but it will end!!
Yep yep and yep 😂 but over time I’ve found speaking to random people often and confidence in myself has helped.
All. The. Time. It is probably what has worsened my anxiety about social situations and the nausea I get
Yep that's me.
I am an introvert. I come off as extrovert when talking to people, because I like basically adapted for survival
Same. I’m definitely confident when talking to others and can be funny if I say so myself, but generally I prefer spending time by myself. I love learning about random stuff more than talking to others. However, I get super happy talking to super intelligent people about super philosophical ideas. So maybe I just haven’t met the right people
@@NegativeAccelerate Same here! Good to know I'm not alone haha
I'm so introvert...i struggle a lot interacting with people. But actually when i find someone who can listen to me and not force me...nobody can stop me from talking😂😂
Btw a small youtuber here
True and very relatable
Same omg
SAME GIRL SAME
I wish... But even people I'm super comfortable around... I have no idea what to talk about with them.
@@amelialalllalala3914 yeah i can relate and sometimes I know its discouraging but we gotta learn for start doing it
ok but when u have social anxiety you know all these things in theory, yet u just physically can't execute them
right
practice. I also have social anxiety and the only way to get rid of it is to do the opposite of what your brain is telling you. If your brain tells you to run away from the situation, just face it.
I am diagnosed with social anxiety disorder but have gotten a lot better in social situations just with practice. Social anxiety definitely makes it harder, but not impossible. Medications and therapy really do work when you have the right ones. Getting in the mindset that you physically can’t execute conversations just because you have social anxiety is just making the case worse. As with many mental illnesses, you have to want to get better before you actually can.
I'm also diagnosed with social anxiety and I can't stress enough how helpfull therapy is. If it's too expencive to seek out a therapist there's really good workbooks out there that can act in the same way therapy does, with the addition being you doing the work alone. A year ago I suffered badly from this disorder, to a point where I barely left my appartment and felt like life was unbearable. Now I can socialise just like anyone else, feeling confident and safe in my own skin, feeling good in new situations and with new people... It takes hard work to get there but if I could do it so can you, and everyone else reading this
@@nowayjose6333 hello!! i was wondering what were some of the symptoms/what made you figure out you may have social anxiety before your diagnosis if you wouldnt mind saying?
(im currently struggling quite a bit with my mental health and wondering if i perhaps have social anxiety.)
That „not knowing what to do with my hands“ is too accurate
O gosh, I feel you! It's gonna be so weird to be surrounded by people again in September. Social contact, what is that???? REAL humans??? 😬
haha lol just came across this comment again, I genuinely thought it was all gonna last till september 🤡😭
"Better to trust the man who is frequently in error than the one who is never in doubt."
--Eric Sevareid
I’ve got a problem though - whenever i’m in a social situation i can never think of what to say next like i just have no ideas. E.g. if i did start asking the cashier “hows your day going” and they replied with something like “not very well” then i wouldn’t really know what to say and i feel like i would make it awkward and just make them feel worse. I would probably make it look like i thought i was superior to them but actually i just can’t make myself seem genuine 😔 or maybe that’s all in my head?? (this video was so helpful btw xxx)
I completely get what you’re saying! I find that in situations like this, saying what you think should be said (or the first thing that comes to mind) is the best answer you can give, even if it feels unnatural. Like if someone says “My day’s been horrible” then the answer I think that person would want to hear is something like “Oh gosh, I’m really sorry to hear that! I hope it gets better!” Even though I wouldn’t normally say things like this it does work and can brighten someone’s day!
It does take practice as well but after a while it just becomes second nature 😉
I completely relate to that! But I am trying my best and force me a little to just say what I think, maybe it won't come out exactly how I want to at first but with time it will get better, and I think it just makes you realize you're too much into your own head and that people outside don't scrutinize everything you say (as you do instead) ❤️
Let's keep trying, what do we have to loose?
Hope you're having a wonderful day ✨
Extroversion is definitely more appreciated in society than introversion. I live in Greece and when I tell certain people (like my mom) that I enjoy doing things on my own, like go for long walks by myself, or I don't want to leave my house every day, it blows their little mind off, like it's something unnatural and I am weird, and for 18 years of my life I actually believed that there was something wrong with me. So I became a psychology student to figure out what's wrong with me, and realised that I'm just really cool.
Social skills are obviously crucial, and I've trained very hard to acquire them, but if I spend 24/7 with people for a period of time like when traveling, my fomo on the forefront and trying to make the most out of it (which kinda makes people think I'm the most extroverted person on earth), I legit need to sleep for like 2 whole days to recover. Then at times, when I spend too long inside my comfort zone in my house without really interacting with people, I genuinely feel I'm forgetting how to function and it makes me really anxious for the next time I am around people, and need a lot of time to mentally prepare to meet people again.
I think I'm thriving when I'm consistently interacting with people, but having enough time for my self to recharge, instead of doing it "in bulks".
And yeah if I'm spending one on one time with anyone, 36 questions to fall in love are always there to make up for any lack of communication skills.
I usually don't write comments, but it's sooo relatable! I thought that I am the only one like this, who has love and let's say "hate" relationship with people :D I like being alone, but after some time without interacting I start to feel so miserable and sad.. And it's even harder when you don't have friends ;(
I love this comment, it’s really relatable to me. I have always felt more introverted and calmer by myself. My friends would always want to go out after a long stressful school week to “finally relax” I never understood that. Whenever I have a long day all I can think about it having alone time. My parents would always make me feel bad for it, they always make seem like people who are introverted are hermits, but just because our brains act different doesn’t mean we should try to change them.
Yes, I'm exactly the same! I feel tired for days after spending too much time with people without recharging, but also, when I isolate myself for too long, I forget how to interact with others.
@@olanuvola yes, you need a good balance
Geia sou my Greek fellow! I agree with everything you mentioned, and I miss Greece so much! :|
you didn't make the distinction between 'thinking ahead' and 'overthinking'. The definition of overthinking is thinking over something more than you should. Planning ahead is what you just described. When you think ahead about what you are going to say is perfectly fine and if it will leave you with no awkward silence, then all the better!
Adding onto small-talk with strangers: compliments!! If you like their jacket, say it. If their nails have a pretty design, smile andtell them you like it! It's only 2-3 sentences, and it'll make your day brighter, as well as theirs! :))
They say quiet people have the loudest minds...
but I put my ear to my quiet friend's head and couldn't hear anything
Total bruh moment
I just laughed out loud😂
dude.....why
i act like an introvert around my friends that I don’t know very well, but when I’m with my close friends, i act like an extrovert. i wish that I could always act like that because I feel like I’d be able to make so many more friends that way
i really hate when people think that being an introvert = being socially awkward and unable to go out and have some fun. you can be really talkative and social but still be an introvert. being an introvert just means that when you’re around a lot of people for too long, your energy drains and you have to take a break to “recharge”. that’s literally it.
I used to be so confident and loud and all that but one day, I was giving a speech and loads of people started teasing about how I was speaking and how I was moving my hands and ever since then I've been so scared to speak and shy. So all I'm gonna say I know it might seem funny or might not seem like a lot but please, don't tease and laugh at people like that because it can do a lot more damage to someone than you think.
this!!!! i relate to this so much. after a while with all the teasing that I was receiving it seriously does affect you and drains you out.
I can‘t imagine you not being confident
It’s funny how Jade felt insecure about being a “nerd” in school but at the same time watching her videos at that time made me feel more comfortable in my own skin at school and helped me own being a nerd💖💖
Who else is loving how Jade has been uploading so much recently?! What a Queen 👸🏼✨
I'm currently working at McDonald's and I love it when people as me how my day is! It happens so rarely, a woman asked me one day and she genuinely cared and I'd had a crap day that day and it made me feel so much better
Book recommendation 📚 "Sorry I'm late, I didn't want to come"
About an introvert who extroverts (is that a verb) for a year as a social experiment.
This book is being passed around my friends group and everyone loves it ❤️
Oh that books sounds interesting! I’m gonna check it out
I’m an ambivert but my low confidence makes the shyness and introverted side jump out lmao if I’m having a good day I’ll talk to anyone
First point starts at 4:04
Jade seems like someone who would make the BEST bff ever, her personality is just magnetic and her outlook on life is so heartwarming
One thing that helped me was imagining I was an interviewer. So asking questions and letting other people talk while also steering the conversation if need be. Watch talk shows and see how the hosts carry the conversation, it helps so much.
I actually did answer the questions just to get to know myself better and it was really nice
I literally said once in my friend group that I was cool, and for the rest of the time I’ve been the cool friend. You are what you tell people you r
I feel so greatful because I find you on social media. In all these toxic things on this platform you making me so inspired about life and motivated about things I wanna achieve. Thank you so much for being you and make me wanna be me
Timestamps:
3:58 Stop overthinking
4:58 Listen
6:02 Questions (small talk vs meaningful)
8:45 Talk to strangers
10:31 Energy
that last bit about the zoom calls, is EXACTLY how I feel... I had a pretty tough last term of school and I thought that's what was making me kind of nervous/ less social and extroverted- that's what made me click on the video in the first place! now I realize that, like Jade, I just really prefer being around people in a physical atmosphere.. THANKS JADE
I am grateful for being alive and having the chance to do wathever I want in life, at any moment.
I have to remind myself so often that I actually can do whatever I want (within legal and ethical limits of course) and it always blows my mind.
I moved out from home last year and sometimes I just forget that I am allowed to live by my one rules.
Sometimes it's the small things like having chocolate for lunch or just walking through the rain.
It's quite amazing the amount of freedom that is just waiting for me.
@Aryan Azeem 😂😂 not on a regular basis, no
might have been a bad example... 😅
I’m starting a new job tomorrow and I’ve been feeling super nervous, so this has really helped me. I’m going to try to focus on feeling less anxious about what people think of me. Thanks!
Just to get this off my chest.
My parents are disappointed that I'm really shy and have social anxiety. They yell at me that I need to talk more especially to adults better. They have my older sister that graduate a year ago that "doing" so well with money talking with adults. My older brother is not doing really in school but is getting along with talking a bit outside my home. And theirs me, want to just talk on the internet enjoy myself but hate peoples, can't talk too much without coughing or looking at something. I get compared to my siblings and my classmates peers that it's brings down my motivation more.
Also what I experience when I was young in school. 1st grade I was harassed and judge by my teacher, 2nd grade everyone bullied me and judge me of my weight and my hair. 4th grade my brothers teacher judge me on how to speak louder and stop being a wimp. 8th grade I was rejected and the guy I like people may have told his friends that they judge me. And here I am onto 11th grade after this summer break. I'm scared of adults not giving me time to slow speak out and just yell at me. All the adults loves yelling when I live and this village does have their own language and people are even more disappointed I can't speak and understand my "language"
My parents are ashamed that I don't want to live where I live current and want to move to Texas
Everyone know everyone in my hometown but as of someone that watches anime, does digital drawing, and hates my home's culture. I'm just cursed now.
All this lead to depression of course and my mom only know but she doesn't care anything. Last year December, was when she find out I have depression. She yelled at me to never go to a doctor for help but now I was giving pills for this and she first started to care about me more. But she stopped and started the yelling again.
This is my life but I don't want it to be it anymore. I want to be gone
Thanks for coming to my TedTalk..(a little joke aside)
@E v e a bit better now, the yelling is still around and more argument happens. But I haven't felt really sad lately. Sometimes I have a hard time talking that if someone yells at me, I tried not to argue back without tearing up.
this uploading schedule is insane Jade props to you for editing and filming that much so that you can bless us with good vibes on the daily
i’m literally crying because this made me feel so understood. thank you so much🥺🦋
I'm going to sixth form in september with no friends except one. I'm sooo sooo nervous, thank you for this video!!
same here!
You’ll be fine! Just be yourself xx you’ll will automatically make friends with people in your classes x
JADE YOU'RE THRIVING!! I feel like you're uploading new videos every day! And they're content is soo good but don't forget to take a break tho!
im 13 and in grade 8 , this april ill be goin to grade 9
like this whole year i have just wasted by being awkward like i rlly rlly rlly want to just socialise but like at the moment i just dont know what to say or ask
like i watched a few of these type of vids but like i rlly just dont know at the moment
this video brought a lil bit tears in my eyes , it just didnt fall off
i hope this vid will help me in the live moment
This video is very helpful. I really needed it now as a quiet individual my whole life I will be starting uni this September and am such a awkward person to speak to. This year I'm challenging myself to speak and gain friends ( which I don't have now just because I push away people due to my introversion)
Thanks for your videos they have been so empowering and helpful through lockdown. 🖤💛
“i love people now” that definitely made me wanted to watch the video even tho i was tired at 2am!!
Thank youu
i love how you took the time to reflect on how society values introversion less compared to extraversion. i'd probably consider myself to be an "extraverted introvert" in that at heart i do need my alone time to recharge and i do value it a lot, however i also love to be around people and be social which is something i've developed and worked on a lot more in the last few years
I think it's called being a "ambivert"
Jade coming THROUGH with the life advice we all need rn 😩❤️
Big love from a v small youtuber 💕
since I started asking baristas about their upbringing I no longer need to take diazepam. thanks jade, this was the best ad for uni accomodation i have ever seen
On the last point you made about asking your friends how they are FEELING: my friends and I have regular ‘check ups’ on our group chat. Every once in a while, one of us will ask “how have you been this week? Everyone feeling okay? Anyone need to chat?” It makes us all feel so valid and comfortable with each-other. Sometimes I will say oh actually I’ve had a rough week and then we will cheer each-other up and be stupid. Having healthy friendships especially now has helped so much.
Working in retail, it is so lovely when people ask you how your day is!!
Jade *talking about being an introvert and extrovert* me: *ambiverted confusion*
V relatable
Truueee
so trueee!! i still think I am mainly an introvert but when I hang out with the right people I am totally extroverted and I love making new friends and making people laugh. The key is to hype yourself up and see your attributes instead of your flaws. I used to think so low of myself and I now I want to punch the past "me" for thinking that way, lol. side note: SHE'S GORGEOUS.
You've become my mentor, thank you so much for the peace your words give me :)
This week, I came back to school and I've started asking this one question that actually people seem surprised to hear but that I think is pretty basic: what do you do for fun? I have forced myself to ask and talk about the experience with others as well and, let me say, the doors this has opened to getting to know people has been shocking. It's not just "what's your name" "where are you from" or "what's your major", it's about the things they do just for themselves, even when no one is watching. I highly recommend.
Just Martine wow i should try dat out
thank you so much for this video - I’ve felt exactly like this since lockdown, like my awkwardness and uncomfortable vibes has come back, like I’ve regressed. but I just keep reminding myself that if I adapted to social isolation in only a couple of weeks, I will soon adapt back to social life! we haven’t forgotten how to be comfortable around people, it’ll become natural quicker than we think. plus, a lotttt of people are in the same situation and will understand✨✨
One tip I have that I have been trying to work on is to try to talk to everyone like u would talk to ur family or whoever ur most comfortable with. I am very comfortable with my family so I try to talk to other people as if I am just talking to my family. Idk if this makes sense but hopefully it’s helpful to some :)))
I'm going to a new sixth form in September, without anyone that I know. The introvert in me is terrified and anxious, but equally I'm so excited to try and make new friends
good luck!
You’ve got this!! ♥️
good luck! i started sixth form last year and my best advice would be talk to people and be kind to everyone :)
I started at a sixth form where I knew no one last year, honestly on the first day just try to be friendly! There’ll be other people in the same position as you.
I’m in the exact same boat! I’m so excited to meet new friends but I just have no idea what will happen
This video encapsulates my teenage years before uni
I've struggled a lot with being better at talking with people and more social so here is another tip - give yourself some grace. If you have an awkward conversation with someone don't carry that around with you. It's ok. Life is just experiences. Try again.
I just want to vent a little bit... I was naturally what you would call an "awkward" person. I used to overthink every single bloody thing I'd say, do and were, I never knew how body language worked, I was fidgety, I played with my hair/fingers and had trouble looking people in the eye. Over the years, I started to pay less attention and just be in the moment, you know, to go with the flow. I started risking more, talking more about my feelings and thoughts, and generally feeling myself. Depressive episodes come and go, but once you learn that nobody is perfect, you start appriciating imperfections way more. To anyone who is in a need of help, you are not alone, you need and deserve love, you deserve a good life and don't ever let anybody convince you otherwise.
@Aryan Azeem croatian :)
Being self confident requires a lot of practice and the all way to be best at is to put yourself continually out there❤🙌.
I don't see any reason why we have to change ourselves to fit into society
Be yourself and don't apologize ☺️😏
I highly recommend *_Quiet_* by Susan Cain; amazing book on introversion
Thanks!
I am an introvert, and it’s horrible.
My best friend is an extroverted person and we often go like to camps or something like that in the summer, and she always gets along with people immediately. While I am to scared to even say hello, she makes friends and they like her and I don’t even like going there because it’s the same thing every time. I’m trying to get over that and start talking to people, and making friends, because it’s just such a difference if you are an introvert or an extrovert.
Hey 🙋 You stole my comment
it is so important to not care what other's view you as
everytime i watch your video i feel like im talking to a disney princess who is teaching me the most beautiful things in life and how to be happy for real🪄💕
these were great tips! as someone who used to be painfully shy, but now i LOVE talking with people (the right people lol), my tip would be to center every conversation around something that interests both YOU and THEM.
Jade touches on this in getting “deeper” in conversation, but to add on, you must be interested in the topic as well because if not, it will show. both you and the other person will not be engaged.
when you continue to have conversations that fascinate you, and the connections that can come out of them, i think it makes interacting with people genuinely fun and being social is something you actually want to do!
I’ve been watching your videos for over 2 years after I found out about you while revising for my GCSEs. I remember binge watching your videos that have motivated me to try out the pomodoro technique, waking up at 5am (which before I found absolutely INSANE), and just try out different ways to prepare for my exams... I have now finished school and want to say a big THANK YOU for making such meaningful videos that can truly help people no matter what the topic is. And this video? It is the best one yet, keep it up Jade! xxx🌻
Now I feel motivated to socialise but we're social distancing😐
Pretend people are like characters in a movie, or a book you love, think how many layers they have to their character ! If you think you’re weird, I can trust you that everyone is way more weird and interesting just like you😂 turn the perspective and focus on them, it helps when you feel unconfident and in your head x
what have we done to deserve these 2 videos in 2 days!! xx
Completely unrelated to the video, but your hair is *GLORIOUS* 🙌 ♥
this is?? exactly what i needed?? thanks jade
so I really needed this... i try to be confident then the social anxiety wins. thank you for sharing this and starting a conversation about this. to anyone reading this, I believe in you ♥️🥺✨
thank you for another wonderful video Jade! after five months of isolation and awkward interactions over zoom, i've had a bit of a social setback. this was very reassuring and came at the perfect time! hope everyone who sees this is having a good day!
You always look so effortlessly put together
I don't know how you do it but every single video is so on point. No matter how down or unmotivated I feel, you always manage to make me feel better. I am so grateful for your existence :)
I'm so shy I can't even have eye contact with people and I'm starting uni next month 😂😅
Aww....tats ok
Even I am shy but we have to accept tat we are shy and hopefully try to open up slowly🥺👍
hey! how is it going now?
@@ingibjorg395 it's going well thank you! I haven't really met a lot of new people because it's all been online, but going to a new place has helped bring out my confidence! ☺️
@@kayleigh.b7714 That's amazing! I'm so glad. So it wasn't as scary as you thought it would be?
@@ingibjorg395 no I was just making everything seem worse than it was 😂 I'm training to be a paramedic so will definitely need to build up my confidence! But off to a good start 🙌
I really agree with what you say. One thing that annoyed me the most is that people always have prejudices about you. When I was in high school, I was the girl who always got the high grades and studied hard. In many peoples mind, it was not possible that the serious study girl also likes to go to a party or could have a social life. So they just don't ask or something and I would be disappointed and feel lonely. I know I'm not the most outgoing person, but when I know people really good and feel comfortable, I can be the most present and enthusiastic people in the room. So indeed there's not only introvert and extravert, but a lot of it is between those. Now with uni, I started during covid, so still don't know that many people and live at home by my parents, so again not really 'part of a group' or going to parties. Also there really is a drinking culture at uni, which just isn't my thing, but a lot of students don't understand that you can like a party without drinking tons of beer. What I want to say is that your videos inspire me for quite a few years now :) I really want to thank you for that, and it makes me happy how many likeminded people there are out there. I'm trying to go out of my comfortzone more often and I really want to start travelling too. I'm now going to study in Norwau for 5 months next semester and I'm so excited!! Also going to do a Lingoda course to improve and practice my English a bit beforehand :) So really thank you Jade and keep up the good work💕
There is a podcast musical about the 36 questions. It's called: 36 questions :) And Jonathan Groff is in it!!! So if you're curious, you can listen it at Spotify or you can just search for 36 questions the musical podcast.
Is jade posting like 6 times a day, i swear she seems to always have a new video for me. I'm not complaining!
I’ve always been shy and lacked confidence but in the last couple years I’ve become anxious which has manifested itself through nausea and being quite emotional about having to go out and socialise
Strange but relatable to the whole talking to strangers thing. I love when tourists ask me for help or advice. I find it like rewarding that the are taking local interest in where i live
this whole video reminds me of that one tiktok which say something along the lines of: "it's not a coincidence that people who were bullied in secondary school THRIVE at university... IT'S NOT A COINCIDENCE"
You know I always thought I was shy and insecure as a child and growing up (I'm not anymore), But I watched a couple of old videos and realized I acted the same way as I do now until I was 11-15 years old. Those where my dark age ( now 17). it's crazy to think that I was myself as a child and lost who I am in my early teen days.
I find this video so so helpful, compared to other “how to be more social”-videos this one has been… more practical? I feel hyped. And one tip I find so useful for meaningful conversations is to just share something you are vulnerable about, very often the person you are talking to cam relate and you can share and reflect together!
I've worked in a store for 6 years, no one ever asked me how I was! You are such a sweet and kind soul! ❤️
I haven't finished it yet but I'm so thankful for having you in this world!! I always have so much energy after I watch your videos, thank you❤️
your new uploads just make me happyy
this was exactly a year ago but i saw the video for the first time today and it came at the perfect time. yesterday i cried myself to sleep because i called my best friend after talking to no one for a long time and i realized i was just so awkard and I felt so bad!! In a few days I'm going to a youth camp with a lot of strangers. I'm so scared, but I'll challenge myself and do my best. thank you jade
....two jade videos in two days? BLESSED