The Guv looks at what hell sounds like in different parts of the world. ------------ Follow the Al on Twitter at / almurray Become a fan on Facebook at / thepublandlord
Jokes also go completely over German's heads too. Many years ago I had a German girlfriend and one day she came home from work and asked me to explain a joke she'd heard at work in the morning. She'd spent all day pondering this joke as she didn't understand why everyone else thought it was funny. I asked her to repeat the joke to me. "Blonde women call hair dye artificial intelligence", she said. She then followed up with, "But zee hair dye ist poison. If zhey drink it zhey will become ill??!!". I told her that blonde women dye their hair brunette so that people don't realise that they're dumb blondes. She finally understood the joke then. (She was a brunette).
Old joke. Heaven is: an English butler a French cook a German mechanic an Italian lover Hell is: an English cook a French butler a German lover an Italian mechanic
@@Ivanfpcs If you really want to deconstruct it - Gordon Ramsay is your chef, female French butler, and have you SEEN the stuff that comes out of Germany? This may not be hell, but you're probably going to it living in this house of debauchery.
My favourite thing about this piece is that he labels the French as "filthy, sensuous, and lascivious people" but his description of Hell in the Dutch accent came across much more true what the French were supposed to be. For €40! Bless you, Guv.
@@diazinth Thats exactly it, i think. Coming from him, they sound like a joke. From other non-PC comedians they can sometimes sound like a jab at PC disguised as a joke.
@@19Prometheus89 As someone who loves non pc humour. You need to ACTUALLY tell a joke. Just saying something edgy or making fun of woke sure works as shock humour. But you still need a joke.
@@dillydraws I don't even remember what this was about, so won't comment much. But due to Al Murray being a caricature some of his jokes are funny where they normally wouldn't be because of their absurd nature (especially when you consider the comedian playing Al is left wing) Plus, humour is subjective. It would seem i found this funny at the time. Three years have passed, I might not find this funny at all anymore. On your points, we agree.
.A very funny,smart,intelligent,educational comedian is Al Murray🙏..never seen a bad show ever...He is The Master,He Is The Pub Landlord Al Murray..🙏...Always loving your work Al👌😂🙏😂
Heaven and Hell as defined in Europe: European Heaven is: All the policemen are British; all the chefs are French; all the Engineers are German; all the administrators are Swiss and all the lovers are Italian. European Hell is: All the chefs are English; all the Engineers are French; all the lovers are Swiss; all the police are German and all the Administrators are Italian.
If anyone pushes in at the bar and you say "er excuse me" they dont care ... but try "Oi! Pal! Queue up!" in a Scottish accent and they shit 'emselves!
I went there in 1981, and went to the railway station 'goods yard', handed them my passport, and got a stamp put in; 'HELL GODS EXPEDITION' . Great stuff!
A french desciption of hell would have three versions,either as a film noir directed by François Truffaut or sung by Serge Gainsbourg or a fashion show designed by Jean Paul Gaultier
@@richardschiffman7657 yeah huckleberry finn said the same. I learned that when I was 10. Heaven is no place for me, cos all my mates are definitely in hell
The American accent sounds like it's trying to sell me flex tape
@@Funkiam we'll never know
@@Funkiam don't know why he wouldn't it even works underwater!
That's a LOTTA DAMAGE!
What is flex tape ?
RED fuck off
Australians just describe Hell as a bonza place to escape the summer heat
...and I'll wager Hell's fires are no match for ours at the moment either 😢
Even the devil's thinking "keep that shit away from me!"
Too fuck'n right mate...
I live in Saudi Arabia in the summer we have 67C
@@thatfatguyinmcdonaldseatin6389 That's messed up mate 😳
I think the German joke went right over peoples heads
But ve vere just following orders
Ostrum well it’s not the first time a joke involving Germans went over someone’s head
Lol "instructions"
Jokes also go completely over German's heads too.
Many years ago I had a German girlfriend and one day she came home from work and asked me to explain a joke she'd heard at work in the morning. She'd spent all day pondering this joke as she didn't understand why everyone else thought it was funny. I asked her to repeat the joke to me.
"Blonde women call hair dye artificial intelligence", she said. She then followed up with, "But zee hair dye ist poison. If zhey drink it zhey will become ill??!!".
I told her that blonde women dye their hair brunette so that people don't realise that they're dumb blondes.
She finally understood the joke then. (She was a brunette).
@@CZ350tuner Are there blonde jokes in Germany? It's definitely a part of US and British jokes.
Contrary to the Scottish, if you describe hell in a Welsh accent it sounds like an advertisement for a really bizarre spa experience
As part Irish, I can determine that this is true.
Oh theres lovely boyo hell is it lovely, hymns and arias, have a good sing song init, don't forget to have a whip around for the devils, etc. etc.
Hell to a Welshman is England.
@@MartynTaylor50 what you too?
@@MartynTaylor50 Oddly true
Old joke. Heaven is:
an English butler
a French cook
a German mechanic
an Italian lover
Hell is:
an English cook
a French butler
a German lover
an Italian mechanic
Italian mechanic? Have you ever heard of Ferrari?
@@Ivanfpcs Spoiler alert... it's a joke, and an old one at that.
I'm half German and half Italian. Must make me a pretty chaotic lover.
@@Ivanfpcs If you really want to deconstruct it - Gordon Ramsay is your chef, female French butler, and have you SEEN the stuff that comes out of Germany?
This may not be hell, but you're probably going to it living in this house of debauchery.
@@MC_Mega-Jessup Gordon ramsay is scottish, not english
In all fairness anything sounds scary in a Scottish accent
Oh, aye, English bastards!
Because the Scots are hard bastards.
@Allington Marakan I'm from Glasgow had to laugh at this as I can picture it in my head.
FOR SCOTLAND YE BASTARDS
Dave Seekers ha not me
I was trying to picture him describing hell in an Indian accent, but it just sound like Deepak Chopra trying to sell me some expired essential oils.
in an indian accent it sounds like a scammer trying to sell a fake holiday
Living in India is hell
@@bigboyrambo2009 May I ask why?
Hell is a place where the beer kegs have holes in them, and the women don’t!!!
Or everyone has too many holes but they're all too big and loose and dry~
@@rewrose2838 you sound like you're getting off to this, lol
@@Simon-xi7lb lol so true !! i felt that this is the worst comment one can make but then again like u said i could be wrong
@@rewrose2838 ah, lad, keep it to your hentai doujinshis
At least your woman won't nag you when you get home pissed.
Dutch accent.... First time I hear a foreigner do a perfect accent of my people. Respect!
It genuinely hurts to listen to
Cool story bro
Sounds like Bas Rutten's night out.
You can probably find this on offer in Amsterdam red light district.
@@SirFooplesTheThird So does their language. 🤷♂️😂
3:30 The American accent sounds like he is trying to sell me cleaning supplies.
As thick as his Britt accent is, I’m surprised how well he impersonation of those accents were
His London Brit accent is also an impersonation....
@@Horriblebastad preferably purple.
I think he puts the thick accent on
Listen to his actual voice, he's a well spoken man with a clever mind.
@@andrewhutchinson4228 went to Oxford
Any horror story told by the Scots sounds even more terrifying. Then again, even if it’s not a horror story it sounds terrifying.
You should check out Fraser's story of the the old empty barn in Dad's Army...
facebook.com/DadsArmyFanPage/videos/832515173517190/
@@No1sonuk Jesus man.
Have you seen peter capaldi? Everything he says is intense.
An English place of hell, Murrayfield.
Love how he uses the derogatory Jock and all the Scots are like yeah me I'm a jock.
Because Jock isn’t derogatory, Jock means ascot in the same way “Yank” means american, or Coward means Danish
My favourite Scottish league player was Jock Strapp. Good at supporting the front
To most Scots being called a jock is a badge of honour.
@Yelaa Bob everything about being Scottish is pure awesomeness pal.
@@howardchambers9679 even when there's NOTHING there to support?😂
An Australian describing hell just sounds like a normal day
Depending on season, summer is a killer
That's one of the most amazing american accents I've heard out an english comedian
As an American, I've never heard any American sound like that.
@Martin Shkreli The Southern accent comes from the British, the Welsh moved there
mustang sally Now you've given me another reason to like the South over the North.
Not imo.
Only because English comedians do such bad American accents 😂 I’m English so not hating
My favourite thing about this piece is that he labels the French as "filthy, sensuous, and lascivious people" but his description of Hell in the Dutch accent came across much more true what the French were supposed to be.
For €40!
Bless you, Guv.
I found it rather unconvincing until it was about making money, fair enough.
I’m Dutch, yeah €40 will do, tax not yet included of course! 🇳🇱😂😂😂
In a perfect world this man would be paid a HANDSOME salary for being the greatest Social Studies & History teacher on the planet.
I wish I could have learnt Al’s version of History at school. My life would have turned out so much better.
The not too dissimilar Northern Irish/Ulster accent would probably be #2 scariest when describing something to be afraid of.
What part of Jersey are you from?
@@arsehole8 North Jersey - Paterson. Been in California for a while though.
When I need cheering up, I watch this. The Guv is just brilliant! It's November 2020 and it still works.
"A Thousand FOOking generation!" Lmaoo, priceless
They'll pool oot your kidneys
I’ve watch only three of his videos and I can already say with confidence: This is the most British man who has and will ever exist.
*Poole oot yer kidneys !*
ONE. BY. ONE
A thoosand fuckng generations
I never tire of this tale. Brilliant Al Murray.
I haven't howled at standup like this in forever. This man is now my favorite
Long live Al Murray! Bollocks to "PC" comedy! THIS is REAL comedy.
Unlike most of the internet/non-PC crowd, he's intelligent enough to make non-PC jokes tasteful enough to enjoy.
@@diazinth Thats exactly it, i think. Coming from him, they sound like a joke. From other non-PC comedians they can sometimes sound like a jab at PC disguised as a joke.
@@19Prometheus89 As someone who loves non pc humour. You need to ACTUALLY tell a joke. Just saying something edgy or making fun of woke sure works as shock humour. But you still need a joke.
@@dillydraws I don't even remember what this was about, so won't comment much. But due to Al Murray being a caricature some of his jokes are funny where they normally wouldn't be because of their absurd nature (especially when you consider the comedian playing Al is left wing) Plus, humour is subjective. It would seem i found this funny at the time. Three years have passed, I might not find this funny at all anymore. On your points, we agree.
Aussies: f--k me should we move to hell? It's so much colder!
Scottish Hell just sounds like the average day of a Pict after ambushing a Roman baggage train
The ‘Gail’ blowing... 😂😂😂
Such genuine comedy.👍👍👍
I dont get it.
I think the French version of hell is like a real estate pitch😂😂😂
Damn his Dutch accent is pretty good.
Eh it was okay, half of it was done well
Heesh Dutsh akshent ish pretty gewd *
@Jan van Speyk its cos we confuse yous for the Germans
@@Ludwig1625 Actually i've lived in ''the nederlands'' for almost 20 years now and that's exactly how Dutch people tend to speak English.
@Jan van Speyk Literally nobody apart from Dutch people get what you are saying dude.
I think I now have a kink for hell
The Scot finishing with ...’ and canna have 50 p for a cuppa tea guv’...😂😂😂😂😂
That's hell of a idea lol
Stop
That's a*
@@BeanMachine360 don't pick me up on punctuation or grammar you plum because if you want to comment make a decent one idiot
@@steveholmes5207 make a decent one, idiot. **
An* idea
.A very funny,smart,intelligent,educational comedian is Al Murray🙏..never seen a bad show ever...He is The Master,He Is The Pub Landlord Al Murray..🙏...Always loving your work Al👌😂🙏😂
Thank you for the uploads We need a good poke During these times Cheers from Canada AKA 1812 firestarters
As an aussie
I say
Hells a free BBQ
Who doesnt like that huh?
Im a Texan. Free BBQ is fuckin awesome
Yeh but its people meat
@Semih Sahin fuck yeah! If only it happened 😂
Someone with gastritis
Love that Al can take the piss out of the Scotts yet still get their respect.👍👍👍
Can't believe I've JUST discovered this guy.. godamn hilarious.
My mam would be livid at this LOL
She'd probably call him a demon who makes evil jokes. XD
In my play-through we just call it Oblivion.
Every time I watch these, my reaction is " he's such a naughty boy" and then I go on to watch another of his international exposés of other 'cultures'
Just couldn't get any better. Accents nailed!
i am Malaysian and i cannot help laughing so hard
I didn't know what this video meant before going into this, but I am glad I clicked.
"Hell" is a headache eternal
You could sing a lullaby in Scottish Accent and it would sound like death threats of eternal damnation
Removing kidneys & eyeballs... then you can't drink beer or watch the football, truly a Scottish nightmare!
As a Scot, I approve 😂
Being locked in a cabin with my ex is my idea of Hell.
You can always just have sex to take your mind off her.
Wouldn't worry ...she's with me at the moment
@@nvstewart 🤣👍😎
Weird way to call your left hand that
in the Scottish accent, it sounds like a normal night out in glasgow
A thoosand fucking generations
😂😂😂 This guy is brilliant! Glad I stumbled over this
Legend! One of the best I've seen
Anyone else died of laughter at the Scottish one
"We were totally lied to by the album covers" - Bill and Ted
the scottish version of hell just sounds like every international restaurant known to America
He always likes to say "now, the point is" 😂😂
Now, the point is
3:30 Keep your hands and feet inside the ride at all times
Comic Genius. Can't get enough.
That was a bloody good laugh. Thank goodness for Al.
Heaven and Hell as defined in Europe:
European Heaven is: All the policemen are British; all the chefs are French; all the Engineers are German; all the administrators are Swiss and all the lovers are Italian.
European Hell is: All the chefs are English; all the Engineers are French; all the lovers are Swiss; all the police are German and all the Administrators are Italian.
British hell is listening to the Birmingham accent for an hour straight
'Hey love what's your name'
'Lee'
'Beautiful British name'
And an amazing new method for endoscopy!
Funny as Hell. 😂
No pun intended...maybe.
@Jacob Zondag Me too. 🔥👹🔥
If anyone pushes in at the bar and you say "er excuse me" they dont care ...
but try "Oi! Pal! Queue up!" in a Scottish accent and they shit 'emselves!
This makes me realize Scottish televangelists would be the most fucking terrifying thing on the planet.
... while you are on LSD.
this man will have a stroke on stage going like this hahaha
Is that Lost voice Guy at 3:50 in the red t shirt?
Woah that’s one hell of a comedian
Scottish name. Plays in a Glaswegian band. Genius. Saw him in Edinburgh. Nails us, every, single, time!
Are these shows current or are they recordings from a previous life-time? er, I mean, from 10 years ago? (not that it's any issue)
From an older DVD, not sure when.
The last line was the funniest! :))
Most underated comedian ever..
The Scot reminds me of an Appalachian brimstone and fire preacher 😂😂😂
Why does Al Murray's American accent just sound like sonic? lol
al murray a comic genius .. just worried my kids think pub landlord is me lool
The Yes Minister description of Europe fits the bill perfectly.
A famous man once said: "Hell that is the other people!"
Cuppa tea had me crying with laughter
2:04 and this is how we beat the Blitz and why the SAS is so bloody awesome.
3:25 lmao im American and he’s so right about that I’m drunk asf this is funny lol
Hell in an Irish accent " Ah shite, the new neighbours just came round and they're a bunch of complete twats"
Al describing hell in 2020 is like comparing a kids roalercoaster vs a big boys roalercoaster
I love this guy.
In Russian it would sound like they are intimidating you and then offering you a choice to get out of the whole thing for a friendly contribution.
Bloody right mate!
As a Dutchman, I agree on the Dutch part. And obligatory riffing on the Germans, too.
Going to hell better than I understand going to heaven, going to heaven you have to watch is to have a music on a loop
You should do more jokes on the Dutch. We have a lot of history and rivalry with the English
Genius
Hell is asking directions in Wales, knowing they speak English as they smile at you and make the sounds of a turkey being choked.
Hell is a town i Norway.
The road to hell is going to be a long way from its original drastically ensconced buildesffd.
I went there in 1981, and went to the railway station 'goods yard', handed them my passport, and got a stamp put in; 'HELL GODS EXPEDITION' . Great stuff!
@@The007Weasel
Simply brilliant. 👍🏾
The British army go there to learn to ski
It is always freezing over
From Australia where is this place you speak of? Wanna go somewhere different for the holidays..
FUCKING QUALITY, COMEDY GOLD!!!!
I am a Scot and this is so true brilliant!
its always scary when a englishman can nail a dutch accent
Great American accent Al, epic.
A french desciption of hell would have three versions,either as a film noir directed by François Truffaut or sung by Serge Gainsbourg or a fashion show designed by Jean Paul Gaultier
Hell has nothing but sin around every corner, lap dancers, rock music, drink and drugs.
Heaven has harps and...🤔
I think you got heaven and hell mixed up, as your description of hell would be heaven to me, sign me up for an eternity of that :)
@@will4may175 yeah, see you in hell mate 😁🍻
@@lovelybitofbugle219 "In heaven, all the interesting people are missing" Friedrich Nietzsche
@@richardschiffman7657 yeah huckleberry finn said the same. I learned that when I was 10. Heaven is no place for me, cos all my mates are definitely in hell
Heaven for climate. He’ll for company. Oscar Wilde