Her body, her choice. She knew what was at risk if she got pregnant. She could've chosen not to, but she did not. She knew the risks and went ahead anyway.She had full bodily autonomy. This is not Jacksons fault.
I was scrolling down to comment this myself then I find your comments saying the exact same thing! When I was younger I used to side with Shelby, Then As I grew older I understood where Malynn was coming from. I would feel the same way about my daughters or neices in that situation if they were ever in that situation (God forbid). It's amazing how we mature and change our perspectives as we grow into adults.
Shelby wanted a baby no matter the cost. Shelby knew her body was fragile but she wanted to experience it. Her mother knew the cost which would be her daughter losing her life.
Shelby was just another pathetic woman trying to have a k1d to save a failure marriage. I have no sympathy for her at all. Her selfishness caused a lifetime of unnecessary suffering for her stupidity.
She knew what could happen I don't think any mother imagines it ever actually coming true and M'Lynn did accept it eventually she wanted Shelby to be happy and Shelby wanted to live life she didn'r want to be afraid of everything
@@aprilgosa5779 Sure, but being cautious and careful with your health is NOT ''being afraid of everything''. The Mother was right, having baby turned out to be too much for her body.
This was what happen to my sister. Diagnosed at age 2, diabetic. Her daughter was 10 years old when my sister (39 years old) passed. My niece found her. My mother was very upset with her pregnancy news.
I am so sorry. This movie must be really hard to watch for you and your family for that reason. I found my mom as well. She wasn't dead when I initially found her but when I did find her she was mimicking signs of a stroke and I had to call 911. After being rushed to the hospital it was confirmed that it was a brain hemorrhage and then I watched her go on life support. She did not survive. The plug was pulled 5 days later. It was so hard to watch. I have an understanding of how traumatizing it must have been for your niece. I wasn't young like your niece though. I was 22 at the time 😢.
As someone who has been strong and healthy my whole life (thank God) and who was pregnant, I can say that pregnancy takes a huge toll on you even if you're healthy. The resources required to make a new human are no joke. I can imagine what being pregnant would be for someone with serious health issues like Shelby. I wouldn't risk it, and my mom would be sooo scared 😢 but then again, one must also be respectful. Shelby wanted to be a mother, no matter what.
I'm with you on this. My sibling got married late and had her daughter at the age of forty-six. As a first-time pregnancy, her body was not used to the large hormone surge, and she had all the first-time pregnancy normalcies, such as daily vomiting, and nausea. This is normal I'm told. But the bigger shock for me, was that she delivered prematurely, due to the fact that at the beginning of the third trimester, her blood-pressure was spiraling, so they did an Emergency C-section, I think, during the beginning of the eighth month. My Niece was born very small, but thank goodness, healthy, and now a Beautiful seven-year-old. I'm grateful every single day.
My sister and I were just debating this. We never caught this moment as kids but now it’s a subtlety surprising moment. Is Jackson pressuring her to have this baby???
@@willybuns228 Don't think he was pressuring her but rather Shelby mistakenly believed that having a baby would fix some issues (that apparently were rising between them).
@@yevgeniyaleshchenko849 Yea you guys are probably right but hear me out! M’Lynn in the beginning says “Jackson’s family is a good ol’ southern family with good ol’ southern values, you either shoot it, stuff it, or marry it”. So we know Jackson comes from a traditional background. And maybe he was willing to “adopt 10 of em (children), we’ll buy em if we have to”. Then when he realized “ a judge wouldn’t give a baby to someone with (Shelby’s) medical record” and there was no success on the feelers for buying a child, the marriage strained. It sounds like for Jackson a child was a non negotiable. Finally, the fact that Shelby presents us with “I want a child of MY OWN” and then follows it up with a look of uncertainty and “……I think it would help things a lot.” kind of gives the impression that Jackson is demanding it despite her health risks. Also what do we really know about Jackson? He is a lawyer (an aggressive field). He is traditional. He is kinda pushy (“At first I thought he was a pest but then he kind of grew on me and now I love him” and “Say you’ll marry me”). Sorry for the essay but this really is a twist for a movie I have seen all throughout my childhood. I THOUGHT JACKSON WAS THE PERFECT HUSBAND.
@@lillyess385atrocious thing. Biological parents monetizing their creatures. Giving up for adoption is an act of love per se, you give up a child so they can have a better life. But gaining money from it? It is disgusting. What parents do that and then sleep at night?
How ironic. She had a wonderfull mother, a handsome husband, lovely friends, niciest father and brothers, but.... she felt she had nothing special in her life.
From her words, it would seem like that. But I believe that because she had such a wonderful family and especially a loving and supportive mom, she felt the need to give the same back to her own child and become that wonderful, loving mother. The sad part is she wasn't able to due to her serious health problems. Her mom knew best, even though she also wished her daughter could have a normal life.
This hits close to home for me. My cousin has severe type 1 diabetes, just like Shelby. And the doctors told her that having children would be super dangerous, and that the longer she waited, the worse it would be for her, but all her life she had wanted to be a mom. So she got pregnant at 15. And since we lived in a small, Southern, rural town, that was a scandals on its own, and her family was real ticked off at her for getting pregnant on purpose so young. But she ended up being okay in the end, unlike this story.
I'm glad she had her baby and recovered. But yikes! 15. Not sure I would say "all her life" about anyone at that age. Was she able to raise the kid successfully?
Honestly, I ain't even mad. Her doctor in so many words said the younger the better. 15 isn't ideal that's for sure! But if it worked out it worked out! I'm glad for her!
got pregnant at 15 but all her life she wanted to be a mom???? lolll she was probably confusing reality with dolls, yikes a child that young wanting to be a mother is something thats learnt from family.
It is so sad that a woman in this condition (with diabetes) will do anything to get pregnant, even if it costs her her life. Like when M'lynn loses it at the cemetery and asks "Will this baby ever know what she went through for him?" Good movie, with great acting, emotionally sad scenes.
and he does know because his uncle made sure he would know by writing this movie for him. Showing Jack Jr that his mother loved him so much that she risked her life for him to be here. ❤
@@aprilgosa5779 Did you even watch this film till the end? What ''mother's love'' if at that point the baby was still a fetus and when Shelby had been told not to have children but she ignored all warnings? She didn't get pregnant by accident, she planned for it knowing what the risk was. That's not ''mother's love'', that's being reckless. She didn't even get to spend much time with her son.
Everybody talks about how Jackson was selfish but so was Shelby. These were two young people who didn’t have a care in the world and weren’t used to not getting what they wanted. It’s the arrogance of youth. They never truly believed anything bad would happen to them.
Apparently, both Shelby and her husband WERE aware that there were risks, and the did try adoption and filled out all the paperwork. But as it appears, they were told they were not eligible as adoptive parents because of Shelby's condition. And for Shelby it seems very important to be considered normal in every way despite her condition, and that also includes having a baby of her own, and to some extent, her condition is worsened by stress - the diabetic attack in the beauty salon that she suffers before her wedding ceremony is brought on by the stress of having been told by the doctor that she should not attempt to have children. (She also seems to work a job which takes a great toll on stamina and strength - as far as the movie suggests, she works as an ICU nurse and she also has to work shifts.) It also does not seem that Shelby has not given the risks a thought at all - she mentions that diabetic women have children all the time with no trouble. As far as I know, the story is set in the 1980s and even considering the advances that diabetic treatment has made between then and now, this seems to be generally true. So perhaps the doctor's advice against Shelby having children is not due to her being diabetic at all, but due to the specific form that her diabetes takes (perhaps it is more severe and harder to control in her case than it is in others).
@@christianealshut1123 Thankgod for people like you, some of the comments have been over the top. Some people have forgotten that she yearned for her Own baby, and leave something off her behind. It gave her husband and her family something to focus on when she was gone and to share their grief and love. She wanted a normal married life as much as possible, she wasn’t selfish as some people have said, she was brave right to the end.
Remember that this movie was a play first. And it was based on the real life experience of the playwright’s sister. So if you are reading in criticism of Shelby’s husband, you’re probably right. “Shelby’s” real life brother and family probably do have complicated feelings about Jackson. They probably DO blame him to some degree for her death. I don’t think that’s unreasonable. Doesn’t necessarily mean there’s any truth to Shelby trying to “fix” her marriage with a baby. Remember, Jackson was the one who offered to “buy” a baby if they had to. SHELBY wanted the pregnancy.But young people are notorious for not anticipating consequences.
A woman I met at Highscholl had a rare blood disease that made her frail, with regular hospitalisations and many different medications. She and her partner bought a house, had fur babies and a stable life, despite everything. But she really wanted a child. Her partner went along with it because her happiness was above all else. Well, she died giving birth, never got to meet her daughter or hold her, because she fell into a coma before the emergency caesarean and never woke up. She left an orphan girl and her partner alone to raise her...
@@violettippet5246i don't know. If you're the daughter, you realize someone was so unselfish, they were willing to risk anything to give you a chance to live.
There’s a lot to unpack in this scene. M’Lynn is upset about two things. The obvious one is her daughter willingly putting her life at risk. What’s not obvious is her upset at Shelby for taking her for granted. M’Lynn’s “least of all Jackson” being inconvenienced was adding on to her earlier comment about him not having to carry the baby. She was also saying he wasn’t going to raise the baby when, not if, Shelby dies. But the 💡 for that didn’t happen for me until the “30 min if wonderful….” Shelby knew she wouldn’t be around to raise the baby, decided to have it anyway, and really was counting on her mom to raise it when she as gone. “Mama, I need your support.” Instead of “Mama I just want your blessing.”
A minor theme of this story seems to be the general, grudging acceptance of their menfolk's incompetence. The women do love their men of course, but still... Figuratively, the husbands are all just kinda luggage; they don't often do romance or acts of service, and slope around doing blokey shit while the long-sufferings wives take care of everything else. Took me many years to notice, but now I can't not see it. And you're right, when Shelby passes, that's the end of Jackson's role. Surely M'Lynn knew it all along.
@@pringlebatchI agree. It’s not saying they’re bad partners or bad men in general but that when it comes to the strength required to deal with these complicated situations, they are not adept at dealing with those. They are fine with taking on the traditionally “masculine” types of tasks or interests-like those involving guns (ie getting rid of the birds or Jackson and his hunting). But when it comes to things that bring vulnerability on them, the men come off as incompetent, as you mentioned. The women have to step in and be the brave face to deal with those situations. M’Lynn has to be courageous and bring up the topic of Shelby’s health to both Shelby and Jackson and the risks involved if Shelby gets pregnant. She was strong enough to be the “bad cop” while Drum got to be the one that celebrated his daughter’s pregnancy during the Christmas party because he didn’t bother to look deeper and think about the consequences that would come from it. Even M’Lynn mentions at the funeral that men are supposed to be seen as the strong ones, but Jackson, Drum, and the brothers needed to leave the room when they turned off the machines for Shelby. They couldn’t take it. She was the one who stayed with her till the end.
@@yevgeniyaleshchenko849I don’t think they were saying they’re bad men. They just were not equipped emotionally and psychologically to deal with situations that involved true vulnerability. But, it did show how Spud eventually got that strength to be vulnerable, which led him understanding the impact of losing your wife. He thought about being in Jackson’s situation and losing three person you chose to spend your life with. I like how they showed the most apathetic character pivoting to be a stronger partner to Truvy.
Such a great scene with real life dialogue and no phony reconciliations. Probably the scene that capped the Oscar nomination for Julia but Sally is soooo good and should have been nominated as well, check out here “I want to know why” scene at the graveyard.
The “Jackson character” (although based on a true story), is a selfish jerk, to put her health at risk, leading to her death. Yes, they could have adopted despite her medical condition, with the proper help, if necessary, but it sounds from the exchange between mother and daughter that HE wanted a baby of his own, and she did this to “save” a failing marriage, but it killed her. Makes me cry every time I watch it.
wow, did you even watch the movie? jackson was the one who insisting on adopting, 'we would buy 10 of them if we have to' was his words to shelby. but shelby is the one who wanted to get pregnant even if she knew the risk.
@@julijakeit You need to watch the mother daughter exchange. Shelby clearly very nervous about giving what should be great news in a normal scenario, says to her mother about the pregnancy, “ I think that it would help things a lot.” The mother knowingly says “I see.” The meaning is obvious. He is probably having an affair, but something negative is triggering that statement. Yes, I have seen the film about 100 times. I actually saw it when it premiered.
@@Duricas You are not analyzing, watching, nor listening to the exchange between the mother and daughter properly. The Shelby character, when announcing her pregnancy to her very upset mother who, unlike Jackson, understands how dangerous this pregnancy is for her, clearly says “ I think it would help things a lot.” The mother then looks at her knowingly and says “I see.” That statement is clear as crystal that she is trying to save this broken marriage because he is probably having an affair and there is a power imbalance in the relationship. in truth, he wants a baby of HIS own and she is afraid. She is essentially parroting his needs in trying to convince her mother that everything will be fine, yet is obviously extremely nervous to tell her mother what normally is great news. Why do suppose she is nervous? Think. To correct your flawed analysis, It does not take two to wear a condom, which he would have done if he truly cared about her health (not to mention her mother who lost a kidney as a result). Thank goodness that I do not have to resort to personal attacks when discussing a film critically. I can analyze. How unfortunate that you do not have that ability.
Shelby and Jackson were young sorta selfish. Having that beautiful baby boy, only for him to grow up, never to know his mother. And a new husband losing his young wife. It was a pretty selfish decision to make imo. No one on earth is entitled to every happiness, we have to take what we’re given. Some people aren’t even given a little happiness. No one listened to Sally Field’s character in this movie, and she was right.
Yeah but I understand Shelbys decision even if it did come at the cost of her life and she probably thought nothing would happen to her probably ignorance on her part but I guess she thought because she was pretty young in her early twenties having a baby even though being diabetic she would be find but it also sounded like she was deep in denial about her condition
Also, from what I read, the type of diabetes “Shelby” had was particularly bad, and she was not expected to have a full lifespan. This may have contributed to her determination to soak up every life experience possible even at the cost of ten years or so.
@@jenniferann7212back then, a type 1 diabetic had a very short lifespan even if they didn’t have kids. Shelby’s diabetes was very brittle. She knew she had very limited time on earth, wouldn’t be around for very long and would die pretty young. Even if she didn’t get pregnant and have a baby!
This scene was just gutwrenching to watch for so many reasons. The acting by both Julia and Sally was top drawer! As far as adopting at that particular time period it wouldn't have happened. I also think Shelby wanted her own child. I I didn't like Jackson but I think he deeply cared for Shelby.
actually if you listen to what she said, her and jackson were having issues already. poor shelby thinks having a baby for him will help fix their relationship. it is sad.
3:07 What does she mean by saying “having a child of my own…..I think it would help things a lot”. ? It is so chilling. Does she mean that she and Jackson are unhappy and they hope a baby will make their relationship better?
As a type 1 diabetic too,with complications,the thought of having a child made me feel my life was worthwhile.that the diabetes rules everything,but a baby would have brought joy.
In the play, it is heavily implied that Jackson is an uninvolved husband. No male characters are ever seen on stage, so we can only interpret them from how the women talk about them. Jackson comes from a family of conservative, blue-collar "rednecks", and he seems to be chauvinistic and old-fashioned when it comes to women and their roles as wives and mothers. When Shelby says "it would help things", in the play it implies that the marriage is rocky. However, Jackson is made to be much more likeable in the movie, and their marriage seems happy. I'm surprised that this line was left in from the play, as it doesn't match his portrayal in the film at all.
Okay, this scene in particular makes my heart break for Shelby, bc her Mom was pouring out her heart to her to get her think about what it would do to her health, an Shelby is just not letting it sink in, the scene where Shelby looks like she drove nails up the arm, you could tell after going along with having Jack Jr, you knew it wasn't long before something severe would happen, she would end up in a coma, then taken off of life support. I just got so mad at the ending bc Jackson is in pain an heartbreak while Jack Jr has no Mom an wouldn't see him grow up. This Movie is where I loved Julia's acting bc she was so great in this an Mystic Pizza, I was too young to remember Satisfaction, but after this Movie her career sky rocketed. It's a tearjerker all the way theough.
i know the feeling of doing something against your mothers wishes. Especially when she knows best...& you're trying to convince her how good the outcome will be. But moms (in most cases) know best. This movie is a guilty pleasure of mine. Phenomenal cast. (P.s. it took me forever to realize that was Daryl Hannah)
I can't agree with you about Mom's knowing what's best or father's either. Both my parents were big on pushing marriage and children. My mother was just a control freak and bully. I was in no way ready for it and lucky for me was I was independent of my parents in my early 20's they lost any control that they had because I wasn't dependent on them anymore.
@@karenmonson9893 Having 6 sisters, im glad my mom & dad didn't push children & marriage onto any of my siblings and I. Im sorry your mother was that type of lady. Im proud you got yourself out of that & you're living by your own accord.
@@karenmonson9893 Moms don't always know best, but in most cases they really do want their children to be happy. (As long as that doesn't mean losing their children--which is the case in the movie.) I don't know your parents' motivations but maybe they found marriage and children to be really fulfilling and genuinely thought you would, too (even if that was not the case.)
Not necessarily only that - it's a movie about the strength of the bonds between women, and about the hidden strength of (Southern) women in general. That's why it's also called Steel Magnolias - a magnolia is the epitome of daintiness, but all of these women have a strength (mettle, "steel") beyond what they are given credit for. If you watch the movie closely, you will realize that it generally prioritizes the bonds between the women over their bonds with the men, and that men are rather marginalized within the plot. In this sense, it is also interesting that Shelby expressly follows her husband's wish when wanting her baby to be a boy (which he also turns out to be). She aligns with her husband is wanting to continue the male line (of his family) rather than the female line of which she is also a part. This is also echoed by MLynn at the funeral when she realizes that the boy wholly belongs to his father now.
@@christianealshut1123 I do not see that at all I mean I read the real life husband wanted to remarry right after Susan died and raise the boy to think the new wife was his real mother but I don't see the movie character doing that Jackson loved Shelby I just don't want to think he would dishonor her like that specially if as some say she risked her life to give him a son of course Shelby wanted that baby just as much as he did and the whole boy thing thats not within anyone's power whether the baby is a boy or girl and I believe had it been a girl they would have loved her just the same at least in the movie
@@christianealshut1123 You got the message mostly right! Steel Magnolias was originally a stage play by the American writer Robert Harling, and sadly it was based on his experience with his sister's death. The play is a comedy-drama about the bond among a group of Southern women in northwest Louisiana. The title suggests the "female characters are as delicate as magnolias but as tough as steel". I didn’t know for years that this movie was based on a stage play, but that the source material was the playwright’s own story and experience with his sister’s life, her pregnancy and eventual death from a severe case of type 1 diabetes. Not all diabetics struggle with pregnancy and birth the way this woman did, but many of them are out there and it’s a choice where you gamble with the odds and hope it all turns out okay ❤ luckily, medicine these days offers better odds and chances of survival.
I know Shelby wanted the baby but I've always been confused by the line "I think it would help things a lot" and the look Shelby gives afterwards. Does it mean: 1) Jackson is pressuring Shelby into it 2) Shelby is dissatisfied with married life and needs the baby to give her life purpose 3) They're both dissatisfied with married life and the reality of a life without children has caught up with them. I know M'Lynn interprets it as 1. But I've never been entirely sure how to take it as Shelby was always fixated on having kids as part of her idealised married life but the look she gives afterwards looks fearful/ashamed. All interpretations are valid I guess but I'm keen for other's views on it.
Those reasons are reasons people have kids in real life. To fix their marriage, or please their spouse. And that's NOT the right reasons to have a child ... much worse yet, risk your life for one.
One of the best movies ever. Mothering is the greatest thing anyone will ever do. Whether it’s for your children or your mother. There is fear and joy and a whole lot in between.
A lot of comments appear to miss the subtext of this scene. It’s strongly implied that Shelby got pregnant to save her failing marriage. Plus, based on Jackson’s actions earlier in the movie - there’s a good chance that he put pressure on Shelby to have the baby. He said he was open to adoption, but it seems pretty clear that he’d much rather have a biological son. So, while Shelby is responsible for her own actions, Jackson was still a selfish jackass. He didn’t give her the love and support that she needed - and deserved.
I hate the line "... a lifetime of nothing special." as if having a biological child was the only thing that could make her happy and not being a parent was awful.
I couldn’t get pregnant and I felt the same way., like my life wasn’t going to be special without being a mother.. I had a career, a home a loving husband and supportive relatives but I wanted a baby more than anything and I couldn’t logic myself out of the feeling. After seeing a fertility specialist for years I finally decided adoption was the best decision for us. We adopted in 2003. We brought our son home from the hospital when he was one day old and I’m so incredibly thankful for him.
We all have a right to realize our dreams. Having a baby was hers. The theme of this film is indeed the choice of three minutes of wonderful versus a lifetime of nothing special. We all have our own idea of wonderful.
She simply wanted someone who would carry a piece of her in the world, "a little piece of immortality". She wanted to be alive for ever through her heirs. It's the whole point here, along with the courage and strength of all the women in this movie. Jackson isn't a bad character, he understood his wife's wish and helped her realize it. Beautiful, intense, fantastic movie with a great great cast.
I watched this with my mom when I was 10. I had and still have epilepsy and this movie was my first intro to seizure disorder in a movie. It was troubling to me, and I still think about it sometimes. Her wanting a child of her own despite the risks is something I can relate to now more than when I first watched it. Having a disability doesn't stop me from wanting normal things. And my mom is exactly like the mother in this movie.
Shelby does not have seizure disorder. She’s a type 1 diabetic, a brittle type 1 diabetic. What’s happening in the hair salon scene you’re referencing is her blood glucose levels dropped way too low and very quickly. Shes not having a seizure during that scene.
@@twinkletoes6290 I'm aware of the disability difference, but diabetics can also have seizures. Unless you also have a disorder, shut up and sit down. The exact medical event does not negate the effect it had on me at 10 and my mom who acts very much like the mother in the movie.
I can understand MLynns reaction .... She is scared of losing her child ...... But I can understand Shelbys side to .... she doesnt want to miss out on the experience and is willing to risk everything to have it
what good is it though, when all it results in is a child who now has to grow up without a mother ? she gets her short little time playing happy family and thinks thats worth risking her life, fine. but what about the childs life ?
@@zineguri8515 I feel ya. Hard decision.. that's when it's up to the father and the rest of the family to make sure the child knows how much his mother loved him .. that she was willing to give up her life so he could have his .... Beautiful and Heartbreaking at the same time ..... A Mother wouldn't be a real mother of she wasn't willing to die so her child could live
Susan/Shelby’s real-life husband remarried 5 months after her death. Based on what the playwright said in interviews, he didn’t remember Susan, or a time when his stepmother wasn’t “mama.” It was the reason he wrote this script…he feared his sister was being forgotten.
Its ironic how Shelby wanted a child so bad she couldn't see that she is her mothers child and put herself in her mother's shoes. Im sure if Shelby's baby was in the same position she would react the same.
It’s irresponsible to have a child knowing that you may die and the child may be left with only one parent to care for the child, or the child may be raised by nannies, or even a step mother….and Shelby’s mother may not even get to see her grandchild if Shelby’s husband remarries/relocates after Shelby’s death. Shelby’s mother is correct. This is a death sentence.
These same women here who are picturing themselves in a martyr “holier than Mother Mary herself” position by identifying with Shelby in this movie would not lift a finger to help a young, single struggling mother who was sacrificing food, life and limb for her child. As a matter of fact, they would talk badly about her behind her back and crucify her all over town. It’s foolish and arrogant to do what Shelby, and her husband, did in this movie. “It might help things.” This line suggests that Shelby may have been coerced into doing what she did by her husband. And of course, once you’re PG, you feel like you have to justify it to yourself and everyone else. Put money in your own bank first, or go bankrupt. Put your own mask on first in an airplane in trouble…otherwise, you cannot help anyone else. As her mother correctly pointed out, she could have adopted--there are many children throughout the world who need the love of a good family….or she could’ve gone the surrogate route. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with a woman just living a great life full of love, good friends, a loyal dog, a great profession, and travel….minus kids. Just madness here.
If we don’t get much into the insight of Shelby and Jackson’s relationship other than they had a fight and she wasn’t going to marry him that’s all that we get and then they worked it out. In the scene where he’s asking again will you marry me or say you’ll marry me and she says OK meet me at the church and saying, I think this will help things out a lot makes it seem there might be some issues in the marriage plus her mom asking her does Jackson ever listen to what the doctors and specialist when they give you advice about this and she doesn’t say anything. She wanted to have a baby despite the health risk
This is such a good scene. The line “I’d rather have 30 minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special” really sums up Shelby’s point of view. And honestly, ask yourself what would you want. A long life is a blessing but a life wondering what it could be torture. It’s about choice. M’Lynn could have been supportive of her daughter but instead couldn’t even congratulate her. Heartbreaking.
I think it was really selfish of Shelby to put her body at risk like that, knowing she might not be around to rear this child and hed never know his mother😢
She rather had 30 minutes of happiness than nothing. And now there is a child with no mother and a granny who needs to take up the mother role once again. I could never accept Shelby's decision in my childhood. I should rewatch this film again.
I never understood why they couldn't adopt. Never made any sense to me - it always sounded like Shelby confused why she couldn't get pregnant with why she couldn't adopt.
She wanted a child of her own! She wanted to experience that. I get it tbh, same reason women in their 40’s try so hard to have a baby or women with fertility issues do ivf. I feel like some people just won’t understand but I do.
This made me so mad. I was on dialysis when this came out so it was difficult to watch. Dumb, so dumb. I thought she was being stupid and selfish. Still do!
@veronicaa.1416 very true. Mother did everything she could but many times it's impossible to make other person understand logic or be reasonable. Mother had also talked to the groom about the brides health condition and had gotten his reassurance that he only cares about the bride 😢
When she said I think it would help things a lot, that sounds like the marriage is in trouble. A baby would just add to her serious health issues and it’s selfish of him to have wanted a biological child.
@@foxibotWhat I think she meant by that was it would take the negative vibes everyone had around her health off their minds and her own mind. The baby would be something else positive to focus on.
@@kinndah2519 I’m sure she did, but her mother was right to worry about her. She also supported her once she made the decision. It’s normal to worry about a sick child. Especially when her daughter had been so sick, it’s too risky. It like to killed me emotionally to be told that, but my sweet mother said “in this life you will have many mothers and you will be a mother to many” I have been a mother to many, even grown adult women and men, and I have had children who chose me to be their surrogate mother. I hope it helped them when they needed a mother figure. I miss some of them as if they were my own.
This was so sad b/c Shelby wanted to be a mother and she was wanting to have a baby but she had a serious medical condition and the mother was so afraid of losing her own daughter. Very good acting and makes me cry when I see this mother and daughter scene.
Shelby didn't have to die. In the movie, when she was at work in the nursery, there was a scene where she felt that something was wrong. She didn't tell anyone because she knew there was something wrong with the kidney.
I was so glad she had little Jackson but I stayed a little angry with her after that little rant to her mother about getting pregnant. She pushed the boundaries of her body until she died early and all the while HER mother was doing all she could to support her daughter but keep her alive and healthy! Her mother gave her life, cared for her, WORRIED for her, GAVE HER A KIDNEY, sat by her bed begging, stayed with her while she died WISHING she had “ BEEN KINDER TO HER SYSTEM!” When SALLY screamed WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY after the funeral, I was in tears 😭
The character of Jackson Latcherie play by Dylan McDermott he was in steel magnolias in 1989 he is a great actor with a great heart and also he was in the television shows like ally mcbeal and the practice it had a great experience in his career and he just one of a million
Shelby is very rude and selfish. She already had a lifetime of special . Her mother’s love was unconditional. I did not raise my daughter to talk like this . Shelby ‘s character was not one of her own survival of her living .
And unfair to the child, who might grow up broken, traumatized from the parent's death, and blame themselves for being the cause since it was pregnancy that killed her. Yes, it's her "right" ... but definitely questionably ethical.
This is me and my mom summed up … she’s spitting nails because she’s not calling the shots. Never tell your kids you just want them to be happy because if you feel anything other than happy then you are failing.
Yeah, aside from risking her life, she seems to be having the child to fix a failing marriage. Which is the WRONG reason to have a child, unfair to the child, and unlikely to even solve the problem.
diabetic mothers have a higher risk of suffering severe risks that can be fatal to the mother and the baby itself, thats why her mom was not happy about her pregnancy because the risk of death was higher back then
I find it selfish to have a kid just so they can watch you die before they turn 15.... why would you want to put someone through that in their childhood when you know what will happen. Really selfish.
That could be a chicken and egg situation.. did her mom do it because Shelby wasnt self aware enough or did Shelby never develop those skills because her mom always did it for her?
It’s a shame that Shelby couldn’t take care of her son but her mother was so angry and selfish about her grandson that after her daughter died she went to Jackson aunt house to get the baby She couldn’t see past her own grief to put aside her anger at the time
I remember seeing this movie when it came out (or, rented on video in the days when that was done)...it was a great movie; so many fine performances. Tho', it was a long time ago so I can't remember full context of things, hwr, I previously watched the hair salon scene which mentions abt Shelby's dr advising against having children, so have at least a little context here. As far as the comments re their marriage (Shelby's and Jackson's), again time has altered my memory so I can't remember if there were other "issues" at play (ie, hoping to improve their marriage by bringing a baby into the fold to recapture some of the "magic"), but I would suggest that she and her husband did discuss the matter at length. At Shelby's comments about wanting a child of her own, and thinking that "it would help things a lot" (around the 3 min mark), I believe the inference was how having a little soul around to carry on her memory when she did, eventually, pass would be - while somewhat painful (prob, esp for M'Lynn) - ultimately, comforting. Jack's very being would help ease the pain of her loss, and be a tangible presence for her loved ones to love and hug when they could no longer do so with her. And, ultimately, her memory would be carried thru his genes into future generations. So, sure, there may have been aspects of denial of how serious her condition was in relation to what toll pregnancy and motherhood might take on her, but overall I think she knew - profoundly - what she was doing. For a young woman who dreamed of having children and growing old with one's spouse by her side and future children and grandchildren, to be told that that dream wouldn't be "do-able" (or, certainly not advisable), would have been soul-crushing. Yes, they investigated adoption, but as she states, they likely wouldn't have been successful candidates due to her serious medical condition. And, she stated they also put out feelers re "buying a baby" (wince, but, not naive enough to realize it's not still done), but I truly believe she intended to have a baby of her own - not only to experience that joy for her own self (and, her husband), but also - so that a piece of her would have been left behind to ease the deep pain of her loss. She would have been keenly aware of how difficult it was going to be for her family and friends once she was gone; but, her future child would be her gift to them. And, yes, I'm aware of the argument about how selfish it would be for her son to grow-up without his mother (and, that part does trouble me), given she likely wouldn't survive that long, but for the sake of this movie, I will suggest two things: first, that she and her husband were supposed to be young so he could go on to find a suitable woman to re-marry and help raise Jack (the inference being that Jackson would pick someone who would also honour Shelby's memory), and, secondly, that with SUCH strong, supportive family and friends, they would never let Shelby's memory and influence be lost on little Jack, so he would, indeed, have a strong sense of who his mother was, despite her passing when he was so young. As a mother myself, while it was less than satisfying for Shelby, I can appreciate M'Lynn's reaction to Shelby's pregnancy news...in "mama's" mind, it signified a death sentence for her own "baby". And, understandably, that would have been difficult for M'Lynn to swallow. Again, I think Shelby understood how this fact would not have been overlooked by her mother, and why she seemed somewhat anxious about telling her mom; hwr, clearly she was hoping (in denial?) her mother would have been as excited as she was about the prospect of a baby in the family. That's my take on this scene ;-) Anyhow, a very poignant movie when I first watched it all those years ago, with my beloved momma. And, as I watch clips of it again, months after she, herself, passed away (after a 30-yr/3-bout long cancer journey)... 😭 As a single mom and an only child, we had a fiercely protective relationship, so I can relate to the intensity of this mother-daughter one, as well as how a life-threatening condition affects dynamics (tho', ours was in reverse).
I didn't pay enough attention to the "it would help the things a lot" line...i hate Jackson.He was a selfish ignorant.Probably things weren't so idyllic...and he was willing to make her risk her life.😢 Poor Shelby and her mama
Aw I def feel for her and I would 100% be on her side except for the fact that her fate became sealed and that meant her child would have to lose a mother at such an early age. And even tho the child was super young and most likely wouldn’t remember the traumatic experience, growing up without a parent is hard. Especially when it was avoidable by adopting but I get it.
She made a bad choice amd suffered for it by death Not realizing what it would do to her child and the rest of her family. She should not have gotten pregnant.
I thought about that too. The first baby born from gestational surrogacy was born in 1985, so maybe it could've been an option? It was still so new, though, that I would imagine the success rate was probably pretty low. And there probably weren't many places that did it.
Well, I think she knew she wouldn’t live a long life and this was a way to leave a piece of herself behind. But I still don’t think it was a good decision, but I understand it.
Did we watch the same movie? In my opinion this had nothing to do with Jackson. Shelby wanted a baby. I think she was unhappy and wanted it and that’s what she meant.
Shelby was a selfish pr1ck. She should've fixed her personal problems with therapy instead of having a k1d to help her feel less miserable. I can't stand selfish parents
I always thought Shelby 's character could've fostered instead of having a baby. Some adoption agencies won't deny you to adopt if you have health issues, depending what those health issues are. As for Shelby's diabetes I don't see how or why an adoption agency would deny her adoption. There are people who are diabetic that have adopted babies or children.
All the comments on how Jackson wanted a baby of his own like I’m sure yes but really it was shelby who wanted the baby more! I know we never know what the fight they had she spoke on in the beauty shop and why she didn’t wanna get married at first but I think that’s what it was about is him saying it was okay they couldn’t adopt and what not and her saying she didn’t wanna marry him because he deserves a baby of his own or something like that just an assumption of course! But I don’t think Jackson pushed her to do this I think Shelby just really wanted a baby of her own Jackson definitely should’ve made sure to not get her pregnant though since it’s life threatening… don’t think he did too much to prevent it but I think they’re both culpable
Sickness is a maybe; death is a certainty, but her pregnancy accelerated it. The chances were grave and her husband knew that fact. Her mother cared about that fact; Jackson obviously was apathetic. That's narcissistic and resulted in her death and her mother losing a kidney. He gained a quickie new wife and carefree life free of illness. Shelby lost her life and son and only gained a coffin. Tragic.
@@LaFloridaHemingway I do remember that part how he remarried so quickly and the baby’s uncle wrote steel magnolias so that “ Shelby “ would be remembered and the baby would know what she went through to have him
I don't think it's ever really said. I think the real point was that they were having problems, and either Shelby decided having a baby would fix things, or Jackson implied that not having kids was the issue.
This line has bothered me for 15 years😂 I have come to the conclusion that Shelby knew her health was so bad and her body would eventually give out regardless. By her having a baby, it would be somewhat "easier" on the family. I also think this line can be interpreted in so many ways but I'm choosing to believe my version 😅
Their faces after that line... Shelby looks down in shame. And M'lynn's almost disgusted expression, eventually saying "I see." tells you everything you need to know. It's already an unspoken truth between them. Jackson sucks.
Whatever she is baking, does it really require all those eggs in the box? P.S. Shelby saying a baby would help a lot. That’s not a great reason to have a baby.
Some people are selfish in a marriage they want one thing while the other wants another and don’t care how the other person feels about it especially when it comes to children whether it’s having none or wanting more even though they talked about it before they got married
I just don't understand women like Shelby, who can't be happy without a baby. A baby isn't going to make you happy. Nothing external will "make" you happy because you're unhappiness is internal and that's what needs to be fixed, and just having a baby doesn't fix anything. Including a failing marriage, which was the inference in this scene.
I assume I’m missing something, maybe I need to research, but wouldn’t she have lived if she had some emergency food/sugar on her at all times? Idk, watching the death scene, I wonder if she had something right there in her pocket or a fanny pack or something, would she have had the mental capacity to quickly eat something and then make it to the phone? I know this is based on a real person so I’m sure there’s something I don’t know, but it feels like such an obvious solution for someone trying to live independently with diabetes so they at least have a small chance of saving themselves.
0:59 you know it’s a rough situation when the response to a pregnancy announcement is “I realize that”. It’s like her daughter got AIDS, I wonder if there diabetics still in this position today.
My dears, I encourage you to watch Shelby's Diabetic Attack in a Hair Salon, HERE: ruclips.net/video/M6PJ7uuCUj8/видео.html
Her body, her choice. She knew what was at risk if she got pregnant. She could've chosen not to, but she did not. She knew the risks and went ahead anyway.She had full bodily autonomy. This is not Jacksons fault.
It’s not a “diabetic attack”, it’s a hypoglycemic episode.
They are not called diabetic attacks.
Thank you❤
Shelby was thinking of her baby. Her mom couldn't be happy because she was thinking of her baby, too.
Well said
I was scrolling down to comment this myself then I find your comments saying the exact same thing! When I was younger I used to side with Shelby, Then As I grew older I understood where Malynn was coming from. I would feel the same way about my daughters or neices in that situation if they were ever in that situation (God forbid). It's amazing how we mature and change our perspectives as we grow into adults.
I don't think Shelby was really thinking about her baby, more just the normal life she desperately wanted
My lynn did come around
My lynn did come around
Julia Robert’s hair was serving
Shelby wanted a baby no matter the cost. Shelby knew her body was fragile but she wanted to experience it. Her mother knew the cost which would be her daughter losing her life.
Shelby was just another pathetic woman trying to have a k1d to save a failure marriage. I have no sympathy for her at all. Her selfishness caused a lifetime of unnecessary suffering for her stupidity.
Really felt for the mother, she knew what was going to happen, even then, so sad
She knew what could happen I don't think any mother imagines it ever actually coming true and M'Lynn did accept it eventually she wanted Shelby to be happy and Shelby wanted to live life she didn'r want to be afraid of everything
Her daughter was sick. You can never know what a strugling mother imagines in her most anxious moments...
@@Girl95szia Well, that's exactly what the OP was saying...
@@aprilgosa5779 Sure, but being cautious and careful with your health is NOT ''being afraid of everything''. The Mother was right, having baby turned out to be too much for her body.
This was what happen to my sister. Diagnosed at age 2, diabetic. Her daughter was 10 years old when my sister (39 years old) passed. My niece found her. My mother was very upset with her pregnancy news.
I am so very sorry to hear that
This is so sad. Iam sorry for your loss
I am so sorry. This movie must be really hard to watch for you and your family for that reason. I found my mom as well. She wasn't dead when I initially found her but when I did find her she was mimicking signs of a stroke and I had to call 911. After being rushed to the hospital it was confirmed that it was a brain hemorrhage and then I watched her go on life support. She did not survive. The plug was pulled 5 days later. It was so hard to watch. I have an understanding of how traumatizing it must have been for your niece. I wasn't young like your niece though. I was 22 at the time 😢.
@@jessicacampbell4142 I’m so very sorry Jessica. I can’t imagine how painful that was
@@samanthasmith4038 Thank you 😢
As someone who has been strong and healthy my whole life (thank God) and who was pregnant, I can say that pregnancy takes a huge toll on you even if you're healthy. The resources required to make a new human are no joke. I can imagine what being pregnant would be for someone with serious health issues like Shelby. I wouldn't risk it, and my mom would be sooo scared 😢 but then again, one must also be respectful. Shelby wanted to be a mother, no matter what.
I'm with you on this. My sibling got married late and had her daughter at the age of forty-six. As a first-time pregnancy, her body was not used to the large hormone surge, and she had all the first-time pregnancy normalcies, such as daily vomiting, and nausea. This is normal I'm told. But the bigger shock for me, was that she delivered prematurely, due to the fact that at the beginning of the third trimester, her blood-pressure was spiraling, so they did an Emergency C-section, I think, during the beginning of the eighth month. My Niece was born very small, but thank goodness, healthy, and now a Beautiful seven-year-old. I'm grateful every single day.
"I think it would help a lot" is the heartbreaking line.
I never understood that as a child. Now as an adult, it makes me so sad that her marriage was in trouble so soon. Poor Shelby.
My sister and I were just debating this. We never caught this moment as kids but now it’s a subtlety surprising moment. Is Jackson pressuring her to have this baby???
@@willybuns228i took it to mean that their marriage is in trouble, and sometimes people have babies thinking it will save the marriage.
@@willybuns228 Don't think he was pressuring her but rather Shelby mistakenly believed that having a baby would fix some issues (that apparently were rising between them).
@@yevgeniyaleshchenko849 Yea you guys are probably right but hear me out! M’Lynn in the beginning says “Jackson’s family is a good ol’ southern family with good ol’ southern values, you either shoot it, stuff it, or marry it”. So we know Jackson comes from a traditional background. And maybe he was willing to “adopt 10 of em (children), we’ll buy em if we have to”. Then when he realized “ a judge wouldn’t give a baby to someone with (Shelby’s) medical record” and there was no success on the feelers for buying a child, the marriage strained. It sounds like for Jackson a child was a non negotiable. Finally, the fact that Shelby presents us with “I want a child of MY OWN” and then follows it up with a look of uncertainty and “……I think it would help things a lot.” kind of gives the impression that Jackson is demanding it despite her health risks. Also what do we really know about Jackson? He is a lawyer (an aggressive field). He is traditional. He is kinda pushy (“At first I thought he was a pest but then he kind of grew on me and now I love him” and “Say you’ll marry me”). Sorry for the essay but this really is a twist for a movie I have seen all throughout my childhood. I THOUGHT JACKSON WAS THE PERFECT HUSBAND.
Also with his money a private adoption would have been no problem.
What exactly does a "private adoption" mean? What's the alternative?
@@harringt100 The adoption is between the biological parent and the adoptive parent directly without an adoption agency or a judge.
@@lillyess385atrocious thing. Biological parents monetizing their creatures. Giving up for adoption is an act of love per se, you give up a child so they can have a better life. But gaining money from it? It is disgusting. What parents do that and then sleep at night?
Shelb
@@lillyess385yep. It's handled by attorneys.
I'll go ahead and say it. Shelby was absolutely wrong and selfish for risking her life. She left a kid without a mother who'll never remember her.
I know why her mom was upset
Such a memorable scene. Julia Roberts was here to stay, and Sally Field can do anything. The whole cast was incredible in this. I could go on!❤
As a type 1 myself- I love this mom’s love.
How ironic. She had a wonderfull mother, a handsome husband, lovely friends, niciest father and brothers, but.... she felt she had nothing special in her life.
I don't think she thought that she had nothing special, but she just wanted to have it all, and didn't realize that nobody gets everything. 😢
From the dialog, I don't things between her and her husband were that good. She gives a hint.
From her words, it would seem like that. But I believe that because she had such a wonderful family and especially a loving and supportive mom, she felt the need to give the same back to her own child and become that wonderful, loving mother. The sad part is she wasn't able to due to her serious health problems. Her mom knew best, even though she also wished her daughter could have a normal life.
@@Spice99857 Some people do..
@@jeanjennings5712yeah me either, when she said I think it would help things.
This hits close to home for me. My cousin has severe type 1 diabetes, just like Shelby. And the doctors told her that having children would be super dangerous, and that the longer she waited, the worse it would be for her, but all her life she had wanted to be a mom. So she got pregnant at 15. And since we lived in a small, Southern, rural town, that was a scandals on its own, and her family was real ticked off at her for getting pregnant on purpose so young. But she ended up being okay in the end, unlike this story.
I'm glad she had her baby and recovered. But yikes! 15. Not sure I would say "all her life" about anyone at that age. Was she able to raise the kid successfully?
Honestly, I ain't even mad. Her doctor in so many words said the younger the better. 15 isn't ideal that's for sure! But if it worked out it worked out! I'm glad for her!
There's A TV Show On MTV Called 16 And Pregnant And There Are 2 Moms On The Show That Are Diabetics.
got pregnant at 15 but all her life she wanted to be a mom???? lolll she was probably confusing reality with dolls, yikes a child that young wanting to be a mother is something thats learnt from family.
At 15 your body is not ready for a baby that is why there are laws against having sex at that age ffs children are not meant to have children
It is so sad that a woman in this condition (with diabetes) will do anything to get pregnant, even if it costs her her life. Like when M'lynn loses it at the cemetery and asks "Will this baby ever know what she went through for him?" Good movie, with great acting, emotionally sad scenes.
thats not sad that is a mother's love Shelby wanted him a lot of babies do not get that
and he does know because his uncle made sure he would know by writing this movie for him. Showing Jack Jr that his mother loved him so much that she risked her life for him to be here. ❤
@@aprilgosa5779 Did you even watch this film till the end? What ''mother's love'' if at that point the baby was still a fetus and when Shelby had been told not to have children but she ignored all warnings? She didn't get pregnant by accident, she planned for it knowing what the risk was. That's not ''mother's love'', that's being reckless. She didn't even get to spend much time with her son.
@@seachelb7245 Correction, his uncle first wrote a play which was then adapted on screen.
@yevgeniyaleshchenko849 she provided forever generations in her bloodline. Selfless.
Everybody talks about how Jackson was selfish but so was Shelby. These were two young people who didn’t have a care in the world and weren’t used to not getting what they wanted. It’s the arrogance of youth. They never truly believed anything bad would happen to them.
Shelby was in denial, big time
Apparently, both Shelby and her husband WERE aware that there were risks, and the did try adoption and filled out all the paperwork. But as it appears, they were told they were not eligible as adoptive parents because of Shelby's condition. And for Shelby it seems very important to be considered normal in every way despite her condition, and that also includes having a baby of her own, and to some extent, her condition is worsened by stress - the diabetic attack in the beauty salon that she suffers before her wedding ceremony is brought on by the stress of having been told by the doctor that she should not attempt to have children. (She also seems to work a job which takes a great toll on stamina and strength - as far as the movie suggests, she works as an ICU nurse and she also has to work shifts.)
It also does not seem that Shelby has not given the risks a thought at all - she mentions that diabetic women have children all the time with no trouble. As far as I know, the story is set in the 1980s and even considering the advances that diabetic treatment has made between then and now, this seems to be generally true. So perhaps the doctor's advice against Shelby having children is not due to her being diabetic at all, but due to the specific form that her diabetes takes (perhaps it is more severe and harder to control in her case than it is in others).
Well that’s a bit harsh. Not called for.
@@christianealshut1123 Thankgod for people like you, some of the comments have been over the top. Some people have forgotten that she yearned for her Own baby, and leave something off her behind. It gave her husband and her family something to focus on when she was gone and to share their grief and love. She wanted a normal married life as much as possible, she wasn’t selfish as some people have said, she was brave right to the end.
@ThEhObBiT1959 Yes but that left her child motherless.
Remember that this movie was a play first. And it was based on the real life experience of the playwright’s sister. So if you are reading in criticism of Shelby’s husband, you’re probably right. “Shelby’s” real life brother and family probably do have complicated feelings about Jackson. They probably DO blame him to some degree for her death. I don’t think that’s unreasonable. Doesn’t necessarily mean there’s any truth to Shelby trying to “fix” her marriage with a baby. Remember, Jackson was the one who offered to “buy” a baby if they had to. SHELBY wanted the pregnancy.But young people are notorious for not anticipating consequences.
It seems to me when all is said and done Shelby is the one who made the ultimate decision not Jackson
They left that out of the movie. Maybe the hints really were enough
A woman I met at Highscholl had a rare blood disease that made her frail, with regular hospitalisations and many different medications. She and her partner bought a house, had fur babies and a stable life, despite everything. But she really wanted a child. Her partner went along with it because her happiness was above all else. Well, she died giving birth, never got to meet her daughter or hold her, because she fell into a coma before the emergency caesarean and never woke up. She left an orphan girl and her partner alone to raise her...
It's pretty selfish in a way.
@@violettippet5246i don't know. If you're the daughter, you realize someone was so unselfish, they were willing to risk anything to give you a chance to live.
@@hees0009 Yeah leaving me without a mother and the guilt of having killed her. My goodness, adopt a kid if you want one so badly.
There’s a lot to unpack in this scene. M’Lynn is upset about two things. The obvious one is her daughter willingly putting her life at risk. What’s not obvious is her upset at Shelby for taking her for granted. M’Lynn’s “least of all Jackson” being inconvenienced was adding on to her earlier comment about him not having to carry the baby. She was also saying he wasn’t going to raise the baby when, not if, Shelby dies. But the 💡 for that didn’t happen for me until the “30 min if wonderful….” Shelby knew she wouldn’t be around to raise the baby, decided to have it anyway, and really was counting on her mom to raise it when she as gone. “Mama, I need your support.” Instead of “Mama I just want your blessing.”
A minor theme of this story seems to be the general, grudging acceptance of their menfolk's incompetence. The women do love their men of course, but still... Figuratively, the husbands are all just kinda luggage; they don't often do romance or acts of service, and slope around doing blokey shit while the long-sufferings wives take care of everything else. Took me many years to notice, but now I can't not see it.
And you're right, when Shelby passes, that's the end of Jackson's role. Surely M'Lynn knew it all along.
@@pringlebatch Not all the men, Shelby's father was a good husband and father, I think so was Dolly's character's husband.
@@pringlebatchI agree. It’s not saying they’re bad partners or bad men in general but that when it comes to the strength required to deal with these complicated situations, they are not adept at dealing with those. They are fine with taking on the traditionally “masculine” types of tasks or interests-like those involving guns (ie getting rid of the birds or Jackson and his hunting). But when it comes to things that bring vulnerability on them, the men come off as incompetent, as you mentioned. The women have to step in and be the brave face to deal with those situations. M’Lynn has to be courageous and bring up the topic of Shelby’s health to both Shelby and Jackson and the risks involved if Shelby gets pregnant. She was strong enough to be the “bad cop” while Drum got to be the one that celebrated his daughter’s pregnancy during the Christmas party because he didn’t bother to look deeper and think about the consequences that would come from it. Even M’Lynn mentions at the funeral that men are supposed to be seen as the strong ones, but Jackson, Drum, and the brothers needed to leave the room when they turned off the machines for Shelby. They couldn’t take it. She was the one who stayed with her till the end.
That was the theme-they were all strong Southern women who were there to deal with the tough things that men couldn’t handle-the Steel Magnolias.
@@yevgeniyaleshchenko849I don’t think they were saying they’re bad men. They just were not equipped emotionally and psychologically to deal with situations that involved true vulnerability.
But, it did show how Spud eventually got that strength to be vulnerable, which led him understanding the impact of losing your wife. He thought about being in Jackson’s situation and losing three person you chose to spend your life with. I like how they showed the most apathetic character pivoting to be a stronger partner to Truvy.
The one movie that made me cry. Loved every actress in this!
Sad that they thought having a baby was the answer to fix their marriage. Never is.
Sally Field is magnificent
Such a great scene with real life dialogue and no phony reconciliations. Probably the scene that capped the Oscar nomination for Julia but Sally is soooo good and should have been nominated as well, check out here “I want to know why” scene at the graveyard.
This really was bad news health wise for Shelby. Fantastic cast and movie.
The “Jackson character” (although based on a true story), is a selfish jerk, to put her health at risk, leading to her death. Yes, they could have adopted despite her medical condition, with the proper help, if necessary, but it sounds from the exchange between mother and daughter that HE wanted a baby of his own, and she did this to “save” a failing marriage, but it killed her. Makes me cry every time I watch it.
wow, did you even watch the movie? jackson was the one who insisting on adopting, 'we would buy 10 of them if we have to' was his words to shelby. but shelby is the one who wanted to get pregnant even if she knew the risk.
You do realize that it takes 2, right? It should work both ways. They are both to blame going by your logic, such as that "logic" is.
@@julijakeit You need to watch the mother daughter exchange. Shelby clearly very nervous about giving what should be great news in a normal scenario, says to her mother about the pregnancy, “ I think that it would help things a lot.” The mother knowingly says “I see.” The meaning is obvious. He is probably having an affair, but something negative is triggering that statement. Yes, I have seen the film about 100 times. I actually saw it when it premiered.
@@Duricas You are not analyzing, watching, nor listening to the exchange between the mother and daughter properly. The Shelby character, when announcing her pregnancy to her very upset mother who, unlike Jackson, understands how dangerous this pregnancy is for her, clearly says “ I think it would help things a lot.” The mother then looks at her knowingly and says “I see.” That statement is clear as crystal that she is trying to save this broken marriage because he is probably having an affair and there is a power imbalance in the relationship. in truth, he wants a baby of HIS own and she is afraid. She is essentially parroting his needs in trying to convince her mother that everything will be fine, yet is obviously extremely nervous to tell her mother what normally is great news. Why do suppose she is nervous? Think. To correct your flawed analysis, It does not take two to wear a condom, which he would have done if he truly cared about her health (not to mention her mother who lost a kidney as a result). Thank goodness that I do not have to resort to personal attacks when discussing a film critically. I can analyze. How unfortunate that you do not have that ability.
@@nanny287 I bet you are the type of person who blames everything on the man, right?
Shelby and Jackson were young sorta selfish. Having that beautiful baby boy, only for him to grow up, never to know his mother. And a new husband losing his young wife. It was a pretty selfish decision to make imo. No one on earth is entitled to every happiness, we have to take what we’re given. Some people aren’t even given a little happiness. No one listened to Sally Field’s character in this movie, and she was right.
Yeah but I understand Shelbys decision even if it did come at the cost of her life and she probably thought nothing would happen to her probably ignorance on her part but I guess she thought because she was pretty young in her early twenties having a baby even though being diabetic she would be find but it also sounded like she was deep in denial about her condition
Also, from what I read, the type of diabetes “Shelby” had was particularly bad, and she was not expected to have a full lifespan. This may have contributed to her determination to soak up every life experience possible even at the cost of ten years or so.
@@jenniferann7212back then, a type 1 diabetic had a very short lifespan even if they didn’t have kids. Shelby’s diabetes was very brittle. She knew she had very limited time on earth, wouldn’t be around for very long and would die pretty young. Even if she didn’t get pregnant and have a baby!
This scene was just gutwrenching to watch for so many reasons. The acting by both Julia and Sally was top drawer! As far as adopting at that particular time period it wouldn't have happened. I also think Shelby wanted her own child. I I didn't like Jackson but I think he deeply cared for Shelby.
It’s very indicative of push and pull between daughter and mother.
actually if you listen to what she said, her and jackson were having issues already. poor shelby thinks having a baby for him will help fix their relationship. it is sad.
Even the way Sally Field cracked those eggs was keeping everything in character in this scene. Flawless instincts.
@@BB-xe2dh It's one way to see it. But I initially thought she really wanted a child of her own.
@@vivianpowell1732 Good observation!🙂🧐🤘
3:07 What does she mean by saying “having a child of my own…..I think it would help things a lot”. ? It is so chilling. Does she mean that she and Jackson are unhappy and they hope a baby will make their relationship better?
I’ve always wondered that too! Kinda cryptic.
As a type 1 diabetic too,with complications,the thought of having a child made me feel my life was worthwhile.that the diabetes rules everything,but a baby would have brought joy.
@@victoriadunnett4745 Interesting. Thank you for sharing your perspective!
In the play, it is heavily implied that Jackson is an uninvolved husband. No male characters are ever seen on stage, so we can only interpret them from how the women talk about them. Jackson comes from a family of conservative, blue-collar "rednecks", and he seems to be chauvinistic and old-fashioned when it comes to women and their roles as wives and mothers.
When Shelby says "it would help things", in the play it implies that the marriage is rocky. However, Jackson is made to be much more likeable in the movie, and their marriage seems happy. I'm surprised that this line was left in from the play, as it doesn't match his portrayal in the film at all.
@@dardend4155 Thank you. I find Jackson still pretty unlikeable in the film! It is pretty upsetting that she would say this.
Okay, this scene in particular makes my heart break for Shelby, bc her Mom was pouring out her heart to her to get her think about what it would do to her health, an Shelby is just not letting it sink in, the scene where Shelby looks like she drove nails up the arm, you could tell after going along with having Jack Jr, you knew it wasn't long before something severe would happen, she would end up in a coma, then taken off of life support. I just got so mad at the ending bc Jackson is in pain an heartbreak while Jack Jr has no Mom an wouldn't see him grow up. This Movie is where I loved Julia's acting bc she was so great in this an Mystic Pizza, I was too young to remember Satisfaction, but after this Movie her career sky rocketed. It's a tearjerker all the way theough.
i know the feeling of doing something against your mothers wishes. Especially when she knows best...& you're trying to convince her how good the outcome will be. But moms (in most cases) know best. This movie is a guilty pleasure of mine. Phenomenal cast. (P.s. it took me forever to realize that was Daryl Hannah)
I can't agree with you about Mom's knowing what's best or father's either. Both my parents were big on pushing marriage and children. My mother was just a control freak and bully. I was in no way ready for it and lucky for me was I was independent of my parents in my early 20's they lost any control that they had because I wasn't dependent on them anymore.
@@karenmonson9893 Having 6 sisters, im glad my mom & dad didn't push children & marriage onto any of my siblings and I. Im sorry your mother was that type of lady. Im proud you got yourself out of that & you're living by your own accord.
@@blehlee6745 Thank-you!🙂🤘
@@karenmonson9893she’s delusional
@@karenmonson9893 Moms don't always know best, but in most cases they really do want their children to be happy. (As long as that doesn't mean losing their children--which is the case in the movie.) I don't know your parents' motivations but maybe they found marriage and children to be really fulfilling and genuinely thought you would, too (even if that was not the case.)
People were hurt, people were disappointed and people were inconvenienced
This whole movie is one "listen to your mother' message
Not necessarily only that - it's a movie about the strength of the bonds between women, and about the hidden strength of (Southern) women in general. That's why it's also called Steel Magnolias - a magnolia is the epitome of daintiness, but all of these women have a strength (mettle, "steel") beyond what they are given credit for.
If you watch the movie closely, you will realize that it generally prioritizes the bonds between the women over their bonds with the men, and that men are rather marginalized within the plot. In this sense, it is also interesting that Shelby expressly follows her husband's wish when wanting her baby to be a boy (which he also turns out to be). She aligns with her husband is wanting to continue the male line (of his family) rather than the female line of which she is also a part. This is also echoed by MLynn at the funeral when she realizes that the boy wholly belongs to his father now.
@@christianealshut1123 I do not see that at all I mean I read the real life husband wanted to remarry right after Susan died and raise the boy to think the new wife was his real mother but I don't see the movie character doing that Jackson loved Shelby I just don't want to think he would dishonor her like that specially if as some say she risked her life to give him a son of course Shelby wanted that baby just as much as he did and the whole boy thing thats not within anyone's power whether the baby is a boy or girl and I believe had it been a girl they would have loved her just the same at least in the movie
No This Whole Movie is about not being afraid Shelby was not afraid of dying
@@christianealshut1123
You got the message mostly right!
Steel Magnolias was originally a stage play by the American writer Robert Harling, and sadly it was based on his experience with his sister's death. The play is a comedy-drama about the bond among a group of Southern women in northwest Louisiana. The title suggests the "female characters are as delicate as magnolias but as tough as steel".
I didn’t know for years that this movie was based on a stage play, but that the source material was the playwright’s own story and experience with his sister’s life, her pregnancy and eventual death from a severe case of type 1 diabetes.
Not all diabetics struggle with pregnancy and birth the way this woman did, but many of them are out there and it’s a choice where you gamble with the odds and hope it all turns out okay ❤ luckily, medicine these days offers better odds and chances of survival.
I know Shelby wanted the baby but I've always been confused by the line "I think it would help things a lot" and the look Shelby gives afterwards. Does it mean:
1) Jackson is pressuring Shelby into it
2) Shelby is dissatisfied with married life and needs the baby to give her life purpose
3) They're both dissatisfied with married life and the reality of a life without children has caught up with them.
I know M'Lynn interprets it as 1. But I've never been entirely sure how to take it as Shelby was always fixated on having kids as part of her idealised married life but the look she gives afterwards looks fearful/ashamed. All interpretations are valid I guess but I'm keen for other's views on it.
Probably all three.
Those reasons are reasons people have kids in real life. To fix their marriage, or please their spouse. And that's NOT the right reasons to have a child ... much worse yet, risk your life for one.
The marriage was likely in trouble, and Shelby thought that a baby would help fix it. Big mistake. Huge.
@@ht6743 I see what you did there! 😀
@@ht6743 LOL I caught that reference.
One of the best movies ever.
Mothering is the greatest thing anyone will ever do. Whether it’s for your children or your mother.
There is fear and joy and a whole lot in between.
A lot of comments appear to miss the subtext of this scene. It’s strongly implied that Shelby got pregnant to save her failing marriage.
Plus, based on Jackson’s actions earlier in the movie - there’s a good chance that he put pressure on Shelby to have the baby. He said he was open to adoption, but it seems pretty clear that he’d much rather have a biological son.
So, while Shelby is responsible for her own actions, Jackson was still a selfish jackass. He didn’t give her the love and support that she needed - and deserved.
I hate the line "... a lifetime of nothing special." as if having a biological child was the only thing that could make her happy and not being a parent was awful.
I couldn’t get pregnant and I felt the same way., like my life wasn’t going to be special without being a mother.. I had a career, a home a loving husband and supportive relatives but I wanted a baby more than anything and I couldn’t logic myself out of the feeling. After seeing a fertility specialist for years I finally decided adoption was the best decision for us. We adopted in 2003. We brought our son home from the hospital when he was one day old and I’m so incredibly thankful for him.
The point was the reward was worth the risk at least in her mind .
We all have a right to realize our dreams. Having a baby was hers. The theme of this film is indeed the choice of three minutes of wonderful versus a lifetime of nothing special. We all have our own idea of wonderful.
Well, that's her. That's what SHE thought was special and SHE wanted to make her happy. Nothing wrong with it. We're all different.
It was for her.
They don't make good wholesome movies like this any more
What's wholesome about it?
@@ticketyblue3080 whats not wholesome about it ?
Yes they do, don’t be ignorant.
@@Eliza_Stew ya you wish
What's wholesome about it she dies at the end? 😢😢😢😢
One of my favorite movies and hits close to home. I have a lovely family and I’m not willing to risk my life and my lifetime illness to have children.
She simply wanted someone who would carry a piece of her in the world, "a little piece of immortality". She wanted to be alive for ever through her heirs. It's the whole point here, along with the courage and strength of all the women in this movie. Jackson isn't a bad character, he understood his wife's wish and helped her realize it. Beautiful, intense, fantastic movie with a great great cast.
What an amazing scene from two great actors. Well done!!!
I watched this with my mom when I was 10. I had and still have epilepsy and this movie was my first intro to seizure disorder in a movie. It was troubling to me, and I still think about it sometimes. Her wanting a child of her own despite the risks is something I can relate to now more than when I first watched it. Having a disability doesn't stop me from wanting normal things. And my mom is exactly like the mother in this movie.
Shelby does not have seizure disorder. She’s a type 1 diabetic, a brittle type 1 diabetic. What’s happening in the hair salon scene you’re referencing is her blood glucose levels dropped way too low and very quickly. Shes not having a seizure during that scene.
@@twinkletoes6290 I'm aware of the disability difference, but diabetics can also have seizures. Unless you also have a disorder, shut up and sit down. The exact medical event does not negate the effect it had on me at 10 and my mom who acts very much like the mother in the movie.
I can understand MLynns reaction .... She is scared of losing her child ...... But I can understand Shelbys side to .... she doesnt want to miss out on the experience and is willing to risk everything to have it
what good is it though, when all it results in is a child who now has to grow up without a mother ? she gets her short little time playing happy family and thinks thats worth risking her life, fine. but what about the childs life ?
@@zineguri8515 I feel ya. Hard decision.. that's when it's up to the father and the rest of the family to make sure the child knows how much his mother loved him .. that she was willing to give up her life so he could have his .... Beautiful and Heartbreaking at the same time ..... A Mother wouldn't be a real mother of she wasn't willing to die so her child could live
And she lost her life over it. She's absolutely selfish for it.
Susan/Shelby’s real-life husband remarried 5 months after her death. Based on what the playwright said in interviews, he didn’t remember Susan, or a time when his stepmother wasn’t “mama.” It was the reason he wrote this script…he feared his sister was being forgotten.
Its ironic how Shelby wanted a child so bad she couldn't see that she is her mothers child and put herself in her mother's shoes. Im sure if Shelby's baby was in the same position she would react the same.
“Would it be too much to ask for a little excitement 😠” girl if you don’t sit your ass down-
"excitement" is the wrong reason to have a child alone. Especially when your life is at risk.
It’s irresponsible to have a child knowing that you may die and the child may be left with only one parent to care for the child, or the child may be raised by nannies, or even a step mother….and Shelby’s mother may not even get to see her grandchild if Shelby’s husband remarries/relocates after Shelby’s death. Shelby’s mother is correct. This is a death sentence.
It’s not irresponsible to give someone life and risk your own for someone you love. I feel like a lot of people don’t get it and it’s sad to me.
@@BrandyTexas214this. Sacrificing is love
@@katlyndobransky2419 she sacrificed her life for her son
At least some people talk a lot of sense. Didn’t think this story would cause so much controversy.
These same women here who are picturing themselves in a martyr “holier than Mother Mary herself” position by identifying with Shelby in this movie would not lift a finger to help a young, single struggling mother who was sacrificing food, life and limb for her child. As a matter of fact, they would talk badly about her behind her back and crucify her all over town. It’s foolish and arrogant to do what Shelby, and her husband, did in this movie. “It might help things.” This line suggests that Shelby may have been coerced into doing what she did by her husband. And of course, once you’re PG, you feel like you have to justify it to yourself and everyone else. Put money in your own bank first, or go bankrupt. Put your own mask on first in an airplane in trouble…otherwise, you cannot help anyone else. As her mother correctly pointed out, she could have adopted--there are many children throughout the world who need the love of a good family….or she could’ve gone the surrogate route. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with a woman just living a great life full of love, good friends, a loyal dog, a great profession, and travel….minus kids. Just madness here.
If we don’t get much into the insight of Shelby and Jackson’s relationship other than they had a fight and she wasn’t going to marry him that’s all that we get and then they worked it out. In the scene where he’s asking again will you marry me or say you’ll marry me and she says OK meet me at the church and saying, I think this will help things out a lot makes it seem there might be some issues in the marriage plus her mom asking her does Jackson ever listen to what the doctors and specialist when they give you advice about this and she doesn’t say anything. She wanted to have a baby despite the health risk
This is such a good scene. The line “I’d rather have 30 minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special” really sums up Shelby’s point of view. And honestly, ask yourself what would you want. A long life is a blessing but a life wondering what it could be torture. It’s about choice. M’Lynn could have been supportive of her daughter but instead couldn’t even congratulate her. Heartbreaking.
I think it was really selfish of Shelby to put her body at risk like that, knowing she might not be around to rear this child and hed never know his mother😢
She rather had 30 minutes of happiness than nothing. And now there is a child with no mother and a granny who needs to take up the mother role once again. I could never accept Shelby's decision in my childhood. I should rewatch this film again.
I never understood why they couldn't adopt. Never made any sense to me - it always sounded like Shelby confused why she couldn't get pregnant with why she couldn't adopt.
She wanted a child of her own! She wanted to experience that. I get it tbh, same reason women in their 40’s try so hard to have a baby or women with fertility issues do ivf. I feel like some people just won’t understand but I do.
Julia roberts was so beautiful here
she is
“Please… please”
That part gets me 😢😢 she wanted a baby more than anything. Risking it all… her poor mama.
This made me so mad. I was on dialysis when this came out so it was difficult to watch. Dumb, so dumb. I thought she was being stupid and selfish. Still do!
@veronicaa.1416 very true. Mother did everything she could but many times it's impossible to make other person understand logic or be reasonable. Mother had also talked to the groom about the brides health condition and had gotten his reassurance that he only cares about the bride 😢
Omgosh....I'm reduced to tears with this scene all on its own😢❤
When she said I think it would help things a lot, that sounds like the marriage is in trouble. A baby would just add to her serious health issues and it’s selfish of him to have wanted a biological child.
@@foxibotWhat I think she meant by that was it would take the negative vibes everyone had around her health off their minds and her own mind. The baby would be something else positive to focus on.
@@kinndah2519 I’m sure she did, but her mother was right to worry about her. She also supported her once she made the decision. It’s normal to worry about a sick child. Especially when her daughter had been so sick, it’s too risky. It like to killed me emotionally to be told that, but my sweet mother said “in this life you will have many mothers and you will be a mother to many” I have been a mother to many, even grown adult women and men, and I have had children who chose me to be their surrogate mother. I hope it helped them when they needed a mother figure. I miss some of them as if they were my own.
This was so sad b/c Shelby wanted to be a mother and she was wanting to have a baby but she had a serious medical condition and the mother was so afraid of losing her own daughter. Very good acting and makes me cry when I see this mother and daughter scene.
Shelby didn't have to die. In the movie, when she was at work in the nursery, there was a scene where she felt that something was wrong. She didn't tell anyone because she knew there was something wrong with the kidney.
Who knows though if they could have done anything? Outcome could have still been the same
Here I am … at 10am crying watching this video … Steel Magnolias is gonna be in Movie Theaters again next week… and I’m Not missing that for the world
I was so glad she had little Jackson but I stayed a little angry with her after that little rant to her mother about getting pregnant.
She pushed the boundaries of her body until she died early and all the while HER mother was doing all she could to support her daughter but keep her alive and healthy! Her mother gave her life, cared for her, WORRIED for her, GAVE HER A KIDNEY, sat by her bed begging, stayed with her while she died WISHING she had “ BEEN KINDER TO HER SYSTEM!”
When SALLY screamed WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYY after the funeral, I was in tears 😭
Young people feel immortal. It’s always someone else, never them.
The character of Jackson Latcherie play by Dylan McDermott he was in steel magnolias in 1989 he is a great actor with a great heart and also he was in the television shows like ally mcbeal and the practice it had a great experience in his career and he just one of a million
Shelby is very rude and selfish. She already had a lifetime of special . Her mother’s love was unconditional. I did not raise my daughter to talk like this . Shelby ‘s character was not one of her own survival of her living .
She has a right to become a mom but it's only unfair to everyone who loved her and has to take care of her child. :/
And unfair to the child, who might grow up broken, traumatized from the parent's death, and blame themselves for being the cause since it was pregnancy that killed her. Yes, it's her "right" ... but definitely questionably ethical.
LOVE that kitchen!!!!!!❤
Why did Shelby say she thought having the baby would help a lot. Help with what?
Her failing marriage. Shortly after she died, her husband had a quickie marriage. Al Shelby got was a coffin. Tragic.
This is me and my mom summed up … she’s spitting nails because she’s not calling the shots. Never tell your kids you just want them to be happy because if you feel anything other than happy then you are failing.
I think it would help things alot speaks volumes
Yeah, aside from risking her life, she seems to be having the child to fix a failing marriage. Which is the WRONG reason to have a child, unfair to the child, and unlikely to even solve the problem.
diabetic mothers have a higher risk of suffering severe risks that can be fatal to the mother and the baby itself, thats why her mom was not happy about her pregnancy because the risk of death was higher back then
I find it selfish to have a kid just so they can watch you die before they turn 15.... why would you want to put someone through that in their childhood when you know what will happen. Really selfish.
Shelby did a poor job of being alert to low blood sugars and taking care of it. She relied too much on her doting mother.
That could be a chicken and egg situation.. did her mom do it because Shelby wasnt self aware enough or did Shelby never develop those skills because her mom always did it for her?
And yet she wants to undergo a life-risking pregnancy and take care of a child.
It’s a shame that Shelby couldn’t take care of her son but her mother was so angry and selfish about her grandson that after her daughter died she went to Jackson aunt house to get the baby
She couldn’t see past her own grief to put aside her anger at the time
6:05 that line hits me hard since I can't have kids of my own. I'm not a diabetic, I just can't produce.
I remember seeing this movie when it came out (or, rented on video in the days when that was done)...it was a great movie; so many fine performances.
Tho', it was a long time ago so I can't remember full context of things, hwr, I previously watched the hair salon scene which mentions abt Shelby's dr advising against having children, so have at least a little context here.
As far as the comments re their marriage (Shelby's and Jackson's), again time has altered my memory so I can't remember if there were other "issues" at play (ie, hoping to improve their marriage by bringing a baby into the fold to recapture some of the "magic"), but I would suggest that she and her husband did discuss the matter at length. At Shelby's comments about wanting a child of her own, and thinking that "it would help things a lot" (around the 3 min mark), I believe the inference was how having a little soul around to carry on her memory when she did, eventually, pass would be - while somewhat painful (prob, esp for M'Lynn) - ultimately, comforting. Jack's very being would help ease the pain of her loss, and be a tangible presence for her loved ones to love and hug when they could no longer do so with her. And, ultimately, her memory would be carried thru his genes into future generations.
So, sure, there may have been aspects of denial of how serious her condition was in relation to what toll pregnancy and motherhood might take on her, but overall I think she knew - profoundly - what she was doing. For a young woman who dreamed of having children and growing old with one's spouse by her side and future children and grandchildren, to be told that that dream wouldn't be "do-able" (or, certainly not advisable), would have been soul-crushing. Yes, they investigated adoption, but as she states, they likely wouldn't have been successful candidates due to her serious medical condition. And, she stated they also put out feelers re "buying a baby" (wince, but, not naive enough to realize it's not still done), but I truly believe she intended to have a baby of her own - not only to experience that joy for her own self (and, her husband), but also - so that a piece of her would have been left behind to ease the deep pain of her loss. She would have been keenly aware of how difficult it was going to be for her family and friends once she was gone; but, her future child would be her gift to them.
And, yes, I'm aware of the argument about how selfish it would be for her son to grow-up without his mother (and, that part does trouble me), given she likely wouldn't survive that long, but for the sake of this movie, I will suggest two things: first, that she and her husband were supposed to be young so he could go on to find a suitable woman to re-marry and help raise Jack (the inference being that Jackson would pick someone who would also honour Shelby's memory), and, secondly, that with SUCH strong, supportive family and friends, they would never let Shelby's memory and influence be lost on little Jack, so he would, indeed, have a strong sense of who his mother was, despite her passing when he was so young.
As a mother myself, while it was less than satisfying for Shelby, I can appreciate M'Lynn's reaction to Shelby's pregnancy news...in "mama's" mind, it signified a death sentence for her own "baby". And, understandably, that would have been difficult for M'Lynn to swallow. Again, I think Shelby understood how this fact would not have been overlooked by her mother, and why she seemed somewhat anxious about telling her mom; hwr, clearly she was hoping (in denial?) her mother would have been as excited as she was about the prospect of a baby in the family.
That's my take on this scene ;-)
Anyhow, a very poignant movie when I first watched it all those years ago, with my beloved momma. And, as I watch clips of it again, months after she, herself, passed away (after a 30-yr/3-bout long cancer journey)... 😭 As a single mom and an only child, we had a fiercely protective relationship, so I can relate to the intensity of this mother-daughter one, as well as how a life-threatening condition affects dynamics (tho', ours was in reverse).
I didn't pay enough attention to the "it would help the things a lot" line...i hate Jackson.He was a selfish ignorant.Probably things weren't so idyllic...and he was willing to make her risk her life.😢 Poor Shelby and her mama
Y’all I’ve stayed in the house and the kitchen hasn’t changed❤ my fav movie ever! I live a couple hours away, love visiting
Aw I def feel for her and I would 100% be on her side except for the fact that her fate became sealed and that meant her child would have to lose a mother at such an early age. And even tho the child was super young and most likely wouldn’t remember the traumatic experience, growing up without a parent is hard. Especially when it was avoidable by adopting but I get it.
I love Sally Field. Great role. Poor mama
She made a bad choice amd suffered for it by death
Not realizing what it would do to her child and the rest of her family. She should not have gotten pregnant.
Shelby definitely had tunnel vision about having a baby.
If this was today she could’ve had a surrogate possibly. It’s so sad
I thought about that too. The first baby born from gestational surrogacy was born in 1985, so maybe it could've been an option? It was still so new, though, that I would imagine the success rate was probably pretty low. And there probably weren't many places that did it.
Well, I think she knew she wouldn’t live a long life and this was a way to leave a piece of herself behind. But I still don’t think it was a good decision, but I understand it.
Did we watch the same movie? In my opinion this had nothing to do with Jackson. Shelby wanted a baby. I think she was unhappy and wanted it and that’s what she meant.
Shelby was a selfish pr1ck. She should've fixed her personal problems with therapy instead of having a k1d to help her feel less miserable. I can't stand selfish parents
@@carsonsmith8607the play was different
Yes, she wanted a child but it definitely sounds like she is saying the marriage is in trouble and the baby would save the marriage.
I always thought Shelby 's character could've fostered instead of having a baby. Some adoption agencies won't deny you to adopt if you have health issues, depending what those health issues are. As for Shelby's diabetes I don't see how or why an adoption agency would deny her adoption. There are people who are diabetic that have adopted babies or children.
In one scene, a star was born. and rightfully so. But, Sally Field didn't get enough praise for her performance.
All the comments on how Jackson wanted a baby of his own like I’m sure yes but really it was shelby who wanted the baby more! I know we never know what the fight they had she spoke on in the beauty shop and why she didn’t wanna get married at first but I think that’s what it was about is him saying it was okay they couldn’t adopt and what not and her saying she didn’t wanna marry him because he deserves a baby of his own or something like that just an assumption of course! But I don’t think Jackson pushed her to do this I think Shelby just really wanted a baby of her own
Jackson definitely should’ve made sure to not get her pregnant though since it’s life threatening… don’t think he did too much to prevent it but I think they’re both culpable
In vitro was available! I thought about it even back when I first saw this movie!
Apologies to everyone else but I am with Shelby and Jackson sometimes you can’t let sickness stop you
Sickness is a maybe; death is a certainty, but her pregnancy accelerated it. The chances were grave and her husband knew that fact. Her mother cared about that fact; Jackson obviously was apathetic. That's narcissistic and resulted in her death and her mother losing a kidney. He gained a quickie new wife and carefree life free of illness. Shelby lost her life and son and only gained a coffin. Tragic.
@@LaFloridaHemingway I do remember that part how he remarried so quickly and the baby’s uncle wrote steel magnolias so that “ Shelby “ would be remembered and the baby would know what she went through to have him
Help things a lot??? Was Jackson cheating on Shelby?
I don't think it's ever really said. I think the real point was that they were having problems, and either Shelby decided having a baby would fix things, or Jackson implied that not having kids was the issue.
This line has bothered me for 15 years😂 I have come to the conclusion that Shelby knew her health was so bad and her body would eventually give out regardless. By her having a baby, it would be somewhat "easier" on the family. I also think this line can be interpreted in so many ways but I'm choosing to believe my version 😅
I always thought that maybe a judge would let them adopt once they saw she was capable of being a mom.
Their faces after that line... Shelby looks down in shame. And M'lynn's almost disgusted expression, eventually saying "I see." tells you everything you need to know. It's already an unspoken truth between them. Jackson sucks.
Or does he just a child no matter what? If he was cheating then I think he’s more of a piece of crap than I already thought he was.
Julia Roberts is an amazing actress!! My favorite❤
My cousin was type 1 diabetic with a pump and had 2 children back in the 1970s. So it can work out okay. She is 80 years old now
Respect. If this were real life, it would take everything to respond the way Shelby does.
Foolish.
She dies when her baby was only 1.5 years old.
She got to enjoy her baby for a year and a half.
But youth is wasted on the young as they say
Watching this as a kid I thought the moms reaction was awful, but being a mother now I understand why. 💔
Whatever she is baking, does it really require all those eggs in the box?
P.S. Shelby saying a baby would help a lot. That’s not a great reason to have a baby.
As a woman, before I had kids, my biggest fear was dying without having reproduced.
So I understand this very well.
Some people are selfish in a marriage they want one thing while the other wants another and don’t care how the other person feels about it especially when it comes to children whether it’s having none or wanting more even though they talked about it before they got married
I just don't understand women like Shelby, who can't be happy without a baby. A baby isn't going to make you happy. Nothing external will "make" you happy because you're unhappiness is internal and that's what needs to be fixed, and just having a baby doesn't fix anything. Including a failing marriage, which was the inference in this scene.
I assume I’m missing something, maybe I need to research, but wouldn’t she have lived if she had some emergency food/sugar on her at all times? Idk, watching the death scene, I wonder if she had something right there in her pocket or a fanny pack or something, would she have had the mental capacity to quickly eat something and then make it to the phone? I know this is based on a real person so I’m sure there’s something I don’t know, but it feels like such an obvious solution for someone trying to live independently with diabetes so they at least have a small chance of saving themselves.
Sally Fields face destroys me. 😢😢😢😢😢
0:59 you know it’s a rough situation when the response to a pregnancy announcement is “I realize that”. It’s like her daughter got AIDS, I wonder if there diabetics still in this position today.
I really really love this movie a whole whole lot
I always wondered if that was true about them not being able to adopt. 🤔