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It is great that you broach this topic; I wish the entire video had been about it. As someone who has been on this planet for several decades, it scares me when I see young women putting their entire financial well-being in the hands of men or romanticizing the "men are providers" narrative. When these relationships end, how on earth do you get back on your feet?
@@scentedcloroxbleach194 I think when my parents told me and my brothers about the “6months”; I think that they were saying that within 6 months, you should be above water or close to to your goal. In 3 months, I will be moving to California, already having a job, but since the cost of living is so EXPENSIVE, I will be living with my brother until I can save enough to move in my own place. My goal is to be in my own place within 1 year, That’s my goal😆
When I got married. We decided to get a joint account. Little did he know I had my personal account that my mom said alway save for a rainy day. Thank God I listen. Because I need it when that thunderstorm came. That was 15 years ago.
I was blessed enough to be able to move back with my parents when my relationship ended. Luckily I had just enough money to break my lease and move, but it’s been 1.5 years and I’m still trying to build back to where I was.
Great advice; I couldn't agree more! I made sure I had all my ducks in order & was financially set prior to meeting my ex. It feels good to say that after we split, he left (I told him he had to go & he had nowhere to go but back to his mom's) but my daughter & I remained in the house & we're ok. I can't imagine how stressed I would've been had I not made more sure I was ok first. I mean obviously u hope for the best but u have to prepare for the worst bc u just never know!
Yup I agree. I cannot say and stress this enough ladies have your own. It is OK to make sure you’re OK. Have your own please ladies please. I’m so happy with the career that I have if I stop working for a year, I can always return back to my field.
Yes to all of it!! I’m still very young, no kids no man and I’ve always told myself that I would like to break my family’s generational curse based on this topic. I want to make sure I’m good before I tie the knot with anyone. Your advice is always so real🫶🏾
I am a cup girl all the way. After my postpartum bleeding 5 yrs ago, I just could not go back to pads. I did a bit of digging back then and made the switch. It was a life changing experience for me. I now have a much better period experience and now welcome it with open arms. Not a single cent on pads in the past 5 yrs and I have no intention to in the future.
Great video on a topic that isn't normally shared. I broke up with my daughter's father last year after 7years. We moved to separate apartments but then I lost my job. I have been unemployed and doing contract work over the last year. Thankfully I have family to take us in. I truly understand that sometimes things go differently after a break up. I'm glad you and your son are doing well. ❤
Well said and that is the truth you nail it down well and that is the real truth if you didn't have your home before you all get together you will have to split everything down in the middle i am very proud of you keep up the good work and you give very good advice ❤❤👍👍👍
Always have your own no matter what and don't do joint Bank accounts. Don't do anything that will be hard to get out of if the relationship ends. Proud of you girl!!!
I knew all of this...have watched you guys before when you was pregnant with Amari and when you moved back into the house...the people that stayed there did not take care of your place...you guys redid a lot of spaces....I agree with all of your statements...have something for yourself ahead of time or make out a plan if all fails/the relationship that is....continue doing great thangs, gurrrrl....best wishes and many blessings....❤😊
Love the video, idk this might come off as unsolicited information but you should watch the show you are what you eat and I’m not saying salmon is bad for you I’m just saying how it’s sourced can affect your body. I could be completely wrong but the salmon you have looks farm raised from the amount of fat that is one it (the white stuff on top). If you watch the show Netflix it shows and tells you the affects of how our food is sourced. You may not care but I just wanted to let you know just in case you do. As black women I just want us all to be more knowledgeable about what we put in our body since it affects us a lot.
@@scribe712 yeah I barely eat any fish I’m only way to plant based the more I learn and educate myself the more my diet changes. They are using our foods to kill us
I thought you bought while you and him were dating. I remember you being pregnant when you started renovating. I remember you two dating while you lived with your parents.
Not buying my first home before i got married was my biggest mistake. I am still married but when i wanted to buy a second house for a source of income it was too late the house get to expensive. I had my saving before i met him i could of get a condo or a townhouse . Now if something happens we will be sharing half with him that the law here in canada .
I may try your salmon recipe. I'm not a real tomatoey sauce type person now, but it looked interesting. How does it taste? And I agree, women should be able to take care of themselves, no doubt about it.
Hey Shanique, thanks for sharing/ updating us. It’s always a smart me to have your own and be able to hold your own in a relationship. It’s doesn’t mean your looking for that relationship to fail But things happen in life and at the end of the day a person needs to be able to function in the aftermath of it all.
I just literally made a very similar video . I’m an OG follower so I already knew this was your house . But I’m glad you and your son are stable . God bless I’m going through a divorce. Breakups / Divorces sucks but it gets better .
Hey Shanique, I think you should def consider putting Amari back in swim class. I say this as a 30+ year old woman who finally learned to swim THIS year. I paid for one-on-one classes (just me and the instructor); group classes are not for me. So see if you can get a one-on-one for him or at least a small group class. Practice is key. I had my classes in the morning, and on an afternoon after work, I'd go to the beach to practice. I think taekwondo etc. is good but if I were in your shoes, I'd do swimming. It's a safety/life skill and it can also be fun (as you become fearless of water or in my case, less fearful).
I highly agree regarding swimming lessons. My son - who is 17 years old now - started swim lessons as a toddler in preschool, and we never stopped: making sure he had lessons during summer camps, etc. It has been incredibly useful & fun. This summer, he’ll work as a lifeguard and can make as much as $26/hour (lifeguards are in high demand both in New Orleans & in California - we split time between those two places). My kid is athletic like Shanique’s son, so he played lots of sports (soccer, basketball, baseball); however,swimming is a *life* skill.
He 100% can do gymnastics! Men are of various heights and there are tall women gymnastics too! Some are female gymnasts are naturally short, but the intense training and muscle building at a young age can impact height as well
Hey girl, i been wanting to share this with u for yeaarrrrsss but i thought i'd sound like a weirdo. But i guess idc now😂 anyways i had a dream and u were in it holding a baby (ytbers dont ever show up in my dreams i swear😂) anyways not long after that u were pregnant. Not only that but my oldest son is also named Amari. He's 17 now. So yea just getting that off my chest😅
I thought you & D bought the house lol but I agree with your points. These days as a woman you definitely have to have some stuff in your name, no normal person goes into a relationship thinking yes we’re going to break up but you never know. I don’t want to do 50/50 with a man but trust me I’ll have my own (he may not know that tho) 😂 cause men be wilding.
Yes. I would recommend a first-time owner to take out a loan to purchase your home. Just make sure you have money in the bank to do your down payment and whatever else costs that will occur. Plus, extra money for life's little bumps along the way. IF that's possible. Oh! Make sure your credit is good for the best possible outcome.
@@ShaniqueBuntyn it’s been 2 years now. It feels so confortable. (Except when I put on weight and it was too tight. ) However I don’t have a super heavy flow. So maybe that changes for those who do. I always buy the ones that have the protection all the way up the back.
Thanks for sharing your information will really help someone that’s going threw something and your salmon 🍣 looks really good and I no it’s going to be tasty 😋🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎.
I told my daughter to save and have some "crazy" money. She said, "What's that?" I said if a man acts crazy, you can say DEUCES✌️and not look back.
My mom told me, your left hand has no knowledge of what is in your right. Have your own
@@reid3363 I love it. Smart mom. We try to prepare our daughters. Some of these men don't know how to treat a good woman.
It is great that you broach this topic; I wish the entire video had been about it. As someone who has been on this planet for several decades, it scares me when I see young women putting their entire financial well-being in the hands of men or romanticizing the "men are providers" narrative. When these relationships end, how on earth do you get back on your feet?
This!
Learned this the hard way, but God is always good and helped me put the pieces back together. Definitely learned from it though.
I agree 100%! Us ladies NEED to have something for ourselves, no matter what.
Agreed. We need to be partners in relationships and also be financially stable ourselves
Men can still be the providers while woman have their own. Women should still have an education, develop skills, and/or have a side hustle.
My parents always said “expect the unexpected “ and “always have money saved for at least 6 months”
This is how I learned to save up, but at this point with how expensive things are….is 6 months even enough anymore 😢
@@scentedcloroxbleach194 I think when my parents told me and my brothers about the “6months”; I think that they were saying that within 6 months, you should be above water or close to to your goal. In 3 months, I will be moving to California, already having a job, but since the cost of living is so EXPENSIVE, I will be living with my brother until I can save enough to move in my own place. My goal is to be in my own place within 1 year, That’s my goal😆
I remember when you purchased your home, I thought good girl getting it on her own!!!!! ❤
When I got married. We decided to get a joint account. Little did he know I had my personal account that my mom said alway save for a rainy day. Thank God I listen. Because I need it when that thunderstorm came. That was 15 years ago.
Yep remember when you was looking and purchased your home. Smart woman!!
Yes! Thank you!
I was blessed enough to be able to move back with my parents when my relationship ended. Luckily I had just enough money to break my lease and move, but it’s been 1.5 years and I’m still trying to build back to where I was.
Great advice; I couldn't agree more! I made sure I had all my ducks in order & was financially set prior to meeting my ex. It feels good to say that after we split, he left (I told him he had to go & he had nowhere to go but back to his mom's) but my daughter & I remained in the house & we're ok. I can't imagine how stressed I would've been had I not made more sure I was ok first. I mean obviously u hope for the best but u have to prepare for the worst bc u just never know!
Thanks for sharing!! I agree with you. You just never know. I don’t care how great things are. THINGS HAPPEN
No matter what, better safe then sorry.
Yup I agree. I cannot say and stress this enough ladies have your own. It is OK to make sure you’re OK. Have your own please ladies please. I’m so happy with the career that I have if I stop working for a year, I can always return back to my field.
Yes to all of it!! I’m still very young, no kids no man and I’ve always told myself that I would like to break my family’s generational curse based on this topic. I want to make sure I’m good before I tie the knot with anyone. Your advice is always so real🫶🏾
Love that!
I am a cup girl all the way. After my postpartum bleeding 5 yrs ago, I just could not go back to pads. I did a bit of digging back then and made the switch. It was a life changing experience for me. I now have a much better period experience and now welcome it with open arms. Not a single cent on pads in the past 5 yrs and I have no intention to in the future.
I remember when you were going though the purchase. I was so happy and proud of you. It was definitely a smart move.
Great video on a topic that isn't normally shared. I broke up with my daughter's father last year after 7years. We moved to separate apartments but then I lost my job. I have been unemployed and doing contract work over the last year. Thankfully I have family to take us in. I truly understand that sometimes things go differently after a break up. I'm glad you and your son are doing well. ❤
Well said and that is the truth you nail it down well and that is the real truth if you didn't have your home before you all get together you will have to split everything down in the middle i am very proud of you keep up the good work and you give very good advice ❤❤👍👍👍
Not necessarily…..
Thank you🙏🏽for sharing your situation with us...
*ALL LOVE & APPRECIATIONS*
😍
Thank you for watching!
@@ShaniqueBuntyn You're very welcome😊
Always have your own no matter what and don't do joint Bank accounts. Don't do anything that will be hard to get out of if the relationship ends. Proud of you girl!!!
I knew all of this...have watched you guys before when you was pregnant with Amari and when you moved back into the house...the people that stayed there did not take care of your place...you guys redid a lot of spaces....I agree with all of your statements...have something for yourself ahead of time or make out a plan if all fails/the relationship that is....continue doing great thangs, gurrrrl....best wishes and many blessings....❤😊
Love the video, idk this might come off as unsolicited information but you should watch the show you are what you eat and I’m not saying salmon is bad for you I’m just saying how it’s sourced can affect your body. I could be completely wrong but the salmon you have looks farm raised from the amount of fat that is one it (the white stuff on top). If you watch the show Netflix it shows and tells you the affects of how our food is sourced. You may not care but I just wanted to let you know just in case you do. As black women I just want us all to be more knowledgeable about what we put in our body since it affects us a lot.
I only eat wild caught salmon. Read about the issues with farm raised fish.
@@scribe712 yeah I barely eat any fish I’m only way to plant based the more I learn and educate myself the more my diet changes. They are using our foods to kill us
thanks for sharing this!
Oh I remember when you bought your house. I was winning what this question was about.
I believe in having your own stuff, woman or man.
I love these tyoe of videos. Youre looking beautiful as always
Thank you!
And glad you’re enjoying them
God bless the child who has his own... Both my Mom and Dad told us this growing up as kids.
I thought you bought while you and him were dating. I remember you being pregnant when you started renovating. I remember you two dating while you lived with your parents.
It was purchased before I met him. I had tenants for about year and then the house was renovated.
@@ShaniqueBuntynWow, you go girl. 👏🏽
@@ShaniqueBuntyn Sorry about the break up, but so proud that you are an independent woman...All the best😊
Not buying my first home before i got married was my biggest mistake. I am still married but when i wanted to buy a second house for a source of income it was too late the house get to expensive. I had my saving before i met him i could of get a condo or a townhouse . Now if something happens we will be sharing half with him that the law here in canada .
I'm trying to figure out my plan B, being that I quit my job to raise my kids.
You are one of my favorite RUclipsrs. ❤❤❤❤❤
Wow, thank you!
I may try your salmon recipe. I'm not a real tomatoey sauce type person now, but it looked interesting. How does it taste? And I agree, women should be able to take care of themselves, no doubt about it.
It's so good!
Mmmmm salmon! I am patiently waiting for that top notch bell pepper salmon recipe again 🤤. It is no longer on the food playlist!!🐟
Hey Shanique, thanks for sharing/ updating us. It’s always a smart me to have your own and be able to hold your own in a relationship. It’s doesn’t mean your looking for that relationship to fail But things happen in life and at the end of the day a person needs to be able to function in the aftermath of it all.
I remember the video of you showing your very first home (current home) such a boss move
thank you
I just literally made a very similar video . I’m an OG follower so I already knew this was your house . But I’m glad you and your son are stable . God bless I’m going through a divorce. Breakups / Divorces sucks but it gets better .
I remember her buying the house and fixing it up so i was surprised to see the title 😂
When we post a vlog on the same day 👯♀️ twin where have you been?
I just went over there and subscribed.
Hey Shanique, I think you should def consider putting Amari back in swim class. I say this as a 30+ year old woman who finally learned to swim THIS year.
I paid for one-on-one classes (just me and the instructor); group classes are not for me. So see if you can get a one-on-one for him or at least a small group class.
Practice is key. I had my classes in the morning, and on an afternoon after work, I'd go to the beach to practice.
I think taekwondo etc. is good but if I were in your shoes, I'd do swimming. It's a safety/life skill and it can also be fun (as you become fearless of water or in my case, less fearful).
I definitely will. He would like it a lot more now.
I highly agree regarding swimming lessons. My son - who is 17 years old now - started swim lessons as a toddler in preschool, and we never stopped: making sure he had lessons during summer camps, etc. It has been incredibly useful & fun. This summer, he’ll work as a lifeguard and can make as much as $26/hour (lifeguards are in high demand both in New Orleans & in California - we split time between those two places). My kid is athletic like Shanique’s son, so he played lots of sports (soccer, basketball, baseball); however,swimming is a *life* skill.
He 100% can do gymnastics! Men are of various heights and there are tall women gymnastics too! Some are female gymnasts are naturally short, but the intense training and muscle building at a young age can impact height as well
This is good to know!
God loves you he is working everything out in your favor❤
Yes! Thank you!
@@ShaniqueBuntyn You're welcome. Jesus loves you!
I do the ziplock food prep hack too. It definitely comes in handy.
Lovely recipe! 🤌🏾 full cooking vid next time?
Coming soon!
Well hello beautiful I’m glad your doing good love the recipe good advice today always wa
Watch out for yourself
Thank you so much
Baseball would also be a good sport to try. See if he enjoys little league.
👄Great advice👍🌻🌺🦋
Glad you think so!
Did you guys have to court for custody?
What temp are you baking your salmon? An hour is long for fish that cooks relatively quickly?!
I bake at 350. I personally Like my salmon almost well done. I bake anywhere between 40-60 mins depending on how big or thick it is.
Hey girl, i been wanting to share this with u for yeaarrrrsss but i thought i'd sound like a weirdo. But i guess idc now😂 anyways i had a dream and u were in it holding a baby (ytbers dont ever show up in my dreams i swear😂) anyways not long after that u were pregnant. Not only that but my oldest son is also named Amari. He's 17 now. So yea just getting that off my chest😅
lol wow thanks for sharing that!
I thought you & D bought the house lol but I agree with your points. These days as a woman you definitely have to have some stuff in your name, no normal person goes into a relationship thinking yes we’re going to break up but you never know. I don’t want to do 50/50 with a man but trust me I’ll have my own (he may not know that tho) 😂 cause men be wilding.
Hello love 😊
Hello 😊
Would you recommend as a first time owner to take a loan out to purchase my home ?
Yes. I would recommend a first-time owner to take out a loan to purchase your home. Just make sure you have money in the bank to do your down payment and whatever else costs that will occur. Plus, extra money for life's little bumps along the way. IF that's possible. Oh! Make sure your credit is good for the best possible outcome.
✊🏿
You guys were living common law I’m assuming. Did you have to pay him any monies?
I’m a underwear girl. I love it.
I forgot about that one! How long have you been doing it?
@@ShaniqueBuntyn it’s been 2 years now. It feels so confortable. (Except when I put on weight and it was too tight. )
However I don’t have a super heavy flow. So maybe that changes for those who do.
I always buy the ones that have the protection all the way up the back.
did you go to Harvard?
BTW I wasnt looking for a roommate but I am now if you need a place (ha)
lol I did not
@@ShaniqueBuntyn ok good, I went to Cornell we're rivals with Harvard so I thought I might have to cancel my youtube crush
Hey friend i am new to your channel
Thanks for coming
Thanks for sharing your information will really help someone that’s going threw something and your salmon 🍣 looks really good and I no it’s going to be tasty 😋🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎🤎.
You are so welcome