Your mother abused you. She ought to be ashamed of herself. People that put religion over their own families are completely despicable. You are smart. Put your knowledge to work for you.
It's sad that some people think we actually choose who we like, they don't choose to be straight. We don't choose to be gay. We were born this way and I'm honestly so proud of you. Thank you so much for your story :) SO many people, like you said, will always be here for you. Me included. I love your videos and you seem like a awesome person.
My mom keeps hinting at it. "Is there something you want to tell me?" "You know I'll always love you no matter what, right?" She told me the other day that she doesn't care if I brought home a man from the moon because as long as I'm happy, she'll be happy...and I STILL can't get the words to come out of my mouth.
When you're ready and its the right time it will come out easily. One day hopefully in our life time I hope that its as easy as saying you're straight. Good Luck! :)
zack boos I actually have since come out to my sister! I'm just waiting for a decent time to tell my mom. Things have been a bit chaotic for the last few months, and when things calm down we'll tell her together. I feel so much better about telling her after telling my sister. I think it was just that first hurdle of admitting it to someone else for the first time. She was awesome. I swear she already knew and had a speech planned out for when I told her. haha... Any way I completely agree with you. I think a lot of it just has to do with the fact that girls understand how we could like penis, to put it bluntly. Just how I don't see the appeal to vagina or boobs, straight guys don't understand how or why we like guys. And I think guys are more accepting of lesbians because they do understand why they like women. In the words of Macklemore, "America the brave still fears what we don't know." It's just human nature to fear what we don't understand, unfortunately.
calvin, what a tough story to tell, so thank you for sharing. terry and i have been together for 33 years and coming out in the 80's wasn't easy, but the quality of person you are inside is what helps people understand things a little bit better and you have discovered that. whether you feel like it or not, you are a stellar role model and i wish you the best of good fortune, long life, and happiness. hugs, brooks
I just want to let you guys know I still read all the comments. :) There's a lot of them, but I read every one and thank every single one of you for your kind words. It makes me so happy inside from your words of encouragement. And to anyone out there who is in contemplation of coming out, I hope all goes well for you the day that you do. Much love.
Aww Calvin your video touched my heart, you are strong, you know the ones who love you the most may need more time grow. So it's nothing wrong with you, I know how you feel I came out to my dad and he wasn't supportive at all. But you are loved, so don't feel bad. :)
Came from a similar background. Graduated H.S. shortly before my 17th birthday and joined the Air Force when I turned 17. You will never get fundamentalists to accept you and you can forget that. Live your life the way that you are and remember that God, in his infinite wisdom, made you who you are and he did not make any mistakes. I am 76 now and had a 36 year relationship which only ended with his death of a heart attack when he was 59. You seem to be a bright, intelligent and handsome young man (from your video). Life is precious, live it to the fullest and if your relatives don't like it, tough! They are the ones missing out by not really knowing you.
Don D, though I had a better experience than Calvin, I also enlisted in the Air Force at 17 & graduated HS at 17. After Basic/Tech Training, I started f/t @ IL State University (since I was serving 6 yrs in Air Nat'l Guard + TDY active duty tours every summer semester: 1 in The Pentagon, 1 on Andrew's, 2 in Knoxville & a KC-135 air-refueling mission over Cuba to Grand Cayman for 4 days. Plus college tuition was free). I feel terrible 4 Calvin & others who have their ostrich head stuck in the ground & dont hear anything but their preachers biblical B.S. Hope u enjoyed USAF.
I just want to say it was a privilege to hear your story. Trust me in saying that your journey will resonate to anybody who is contemplating coming out. Even though the acceptance of family is important, nobody can take away your strength and courage if you don't get it. I can relate in that my father couldn't accept me. It has been a couple of decades and I am not sitting and waiting for that to happen. Life is way too short.
Your story is so inspirational but also so sad. Attitudes in the U.S. are much improved since I was young, but you remind us that not every teen today has an easy road to come out. All I could think while watching this is "Whatever doesn't kill us makes us stronger." I'm now a subscriber and wish I could be your friend.
Very moving indeed, I nearly shed a tear near the end. While I live the very open and diverse city of Liverpool in England, I'm still on the road to coming out to my friends. I've told my inner family but they're pretty neutral about it and have told me not to tell anyone, it's something that they choose not to talk about so I have to keep my thoughts to myself. Good luck for the future my friend and thanks for sharing this, you've helped a lot of people.
watching this video moved me in a way i can't really explain. i'm Bi and am fully out now, and i do consider myself relatively lucky because i had the support of close friends during my time of need. i am completely open about my sexuality at school and most people i've come across have been fine with it, those that mattered were fine with it. i do relate to you in the way that i grew up in a very religious household, my parents are quite narrow-minded people, unfortunately. me and my dad have never spoken a word about this topic to this day, and i honestly would prefer it that way. it was one of the most difficult things telling my mom, and although she definitely had a much better response in comparison to your mother, she didn't exactly take it well either. i honestly don't think she ever will... and it's hard thinking about that, things like this are hard to accept. which is why i admire you so much for still being able to love your mom even after all thats happened, because i know that i wouldn't be able to do the same... i know i've written so much but i'd be really grateful if you could post a response? thanks
I'm glad that most people you come across are fine with it. It's good to surround yourself with such support. My dad and I have never really spoken about the topic either. It's awkward grounds that'd lead to a talk that would just degrade me even more, so I never bring it up either. Just live life for what it is, keep a smile on your face, and when you find the one that you love and means the world to you, treasure them. Because they'll be yours and nothing your parents may say about having a same-sex spouse should lessen your love for your future spouse. Perhaps you'll be braver than me and introduce them to your family and they'll come around to the idea. I hope I can when the day comes. Much love. xoxo
***** Hey Calvin, I think you know that I'm one of if not your biggest fan(s) and only wish the best for you. You might consider penning a coming out letter to your dad. This would allow you to take all the time you need and cover all the bases you want. When complete you can give it to him when you're ready or never, but it's available if you need it. Go watch Grant's coming out letter to his mom on his youtube channel Iwantacceptance and see what you think. On an unrelated subject, I was a bad boy!! I decided you needed more exposure, so I hyped your 12 gay of Christmas vid on other channels where I'm subscribed. If you get crap from youtube or youtubers you can truthfully say you new nothing and found out after the fact it was the doing of one of you physco subs.
Really inspiring. You went through, what appears, a really difficult "coming out". It could inspire so many people that have a very strong Religious Family and are fearful of telling their family. You are an amazing guy, be strong and even if it was difficult and there are times where it isn't easy for you (with the family situation), just remember you have your friends and subscribers here to support you!
Thank you so much for posting this. As you said there are so many videos on youtube about guys coming out and having an easy-going experience. It was so enlightening and inspiring to hear you talk about your personal experience. I know it's quite possibly futile but I hope your family can one day see you for who you are and accept you to some degree cause you deserve at the very least that. You're one courageous dude :)
Your story is heartbreaking, I hope things are better with your family today. Acceptance was never an issue for me and I came out in the '70's. Much love and happiness. ❤️
I am sorry that your family has treated you so poorly. Your story is powerful and one that needs to be heard. You will marry the man of your dreams someday, and I hope your family comes to their senses and fully supports you both.
#HappyNationalComingOutDay Remember, only do so when you're ready and feel safe. You're brave and I hope the best for you. I'm happy this video has helped some of you out there. :) Much love, Calvin.
Just come across your video. I don't know how to word this but well done on telling your story because it has already, and will continue to, help so many people :)
Wow, it takes a lot to share this kind of story, Calvin. Thank you for your courage and advice. I can relate a lot since I'm in a similar situation but I hope things by now have improved with your family. Even if there's little progress, it's something. Thinking more about it,... more than normal, I think everyone of us is unique (with faults and virtues, nobody is perfect) so we should live our lives in the way that makes most sense to us, being true to ourselves and others. It's important though, like you say, to do it when it's safe.
Calvin, thanks for posting this video. Like you I'm not close to my family (not because of anything specific, it's just how it is). My friends are the number 1 most important thing in my life. Many people find that hard to believe but unfortunately all families aren't emotionally close.
I had those same fears, had a BF, but could not say, raised Christian and had family try to change me. It's comforting to know I'm not alone and someone had a similar journey as I've struggle with!
Omg I'm so sorry you had to deal with so much of other people's baggage in your coming out process. You handled that with such amazing strength! Much love to you!
hey calvin, you're a really brave dude, keep move on !! :D All people do not accept you as you are, they just don't deserve you and about your familly and church too Never forget that ''God is mercy and forgiveness! he loves all the children, you're a child of god'' Thks to share this moment of your life!! you're a sweet guy, full of love and compassion !! bye take care calvin!! PS: i'm sorry for the english, i'm french so not always easy to write with no errors!! :D
Wow, this just hit me hard. My family is the same way as yours and that's the reason I haven't come out. It's getting hard though, to feel trapped, to feel lonely. Here I am really late at night just trying to find some understanding so thank you. Your story truly gives me strength. It's so hard to even write this because I don't see an end to my problems but I know that one day I won't be able to hide anymore. I just hope my family is even a little more understanding.
You know what Calvin? I am very proud of you! I had a similar experience some time ago and my mom and i have a very good relationship even though we can not speak about my personal life! As for my father, we try to make baby steps for him to accept me. Stay strong, believe in yourself and enjoy giving and receiving love with the people you really want to! I send you all my love and support. G
I am so incredibly proud of you for being so unbelievably brave, being able to accept yourself the way you are even in the difficult situation that you have been in, and I am so sorry that your family and your mum in particular reacted the way she did. It is so courageous of you to make this video, and I absolutely admire you for believing in yourself, breaking away from your family, finding your own place, making your own path with your friends and the people that believe in you. You deserve to live life as the perfect and wonderful and unique person you are, without having to change yourself to please anyone else, and I dearly hope that you live and love happily, and have a loving prosperous life, and find love, and marry a man someday, despite your circumstances. The fact that you have had the strength to live through, film and upload this is truly so admirable of you and i honestly admire and love you so much for this. Thank you so much for sharing your story, as I know it has helped me, to know that you can do it, and I'm sure it will help many others also. I love you so much, and think you are incredible, and wonderful, and I hope you have an incredible life. Good luck with the rest of your journey
Calvin.... Great video. Thanks for sharing. Sorry your coming out didn't go so well. It broke my heart when you said the way your mom treated you. You seem like a great guy. Hope things are better in 2015. God dose love you. Don't let anyone tell you diffrently. Please keep staying positive. Lot more people accept you then don't. Stay positive my friend. God bless.
Calvin , you should be very proud of yourself ! the coming out process is not easy for the majority of us , yes , there are many great and envious stories we get to hear but we don't get to choose our families and how they react and treat us ? your opinion of who you are is more important than what anyone else thinks , including your parents . I hope you are in a better place with your parents ( although i'm guessing not by the sadness in your voice when you talk about them ?) Always remember to love yourself , when that happens it makes it easier for someone else to love you as well . Good luck in all you do . thanks for posting and your honesty .
Calvin, your story is so inspiring and I'm really glad you decided to share it. The world needs people like you, people who are strong enough to live through any bad experiences that may happen to them, who are brave enough to stand up for themselves and give others faith. I can only say I'm thankful to live in a world where people as amazing, beautiful and inspiring as you are exist. Much love xx
I also crushed on Jonathan Taylor Thomas (JTT) too back then as well and even met him my senior year! Enjoyed your story and know it's been awhile, but found it very similar to mine and wanted to reach out to you!
Hi saw you on camcameras channel and your coming out story is closer to my own than many others on youtube. Thanks for sharing. Not every family is supporting and caring unfortunately . Growing up in a Evangelical Christian home with a certain set of beliefs makes it hard to reconcile the things you are taught and how things are in real life. I'm glad that you were able to find yourself and a support system with friends.
I cannot even imagine how tough it was for you... I'm proud of you and of the fact that you still love your mum, I hope one day she realizes her mistake and what she's been missing out. I hove everything's going well :)
Hi Calvin. I just want to say that you are an incredible human being. I am so sorry that you had such a negative coming out experience but I'm a big believer that everything happens for a reason. This will, and probably has, made you a very strong person. You have given me and countless of other people inspiration to just accept who they are. Times are changing, and fast. I am privileged that I was able to see this at a time when I and so many other people need more people like you in the world. Stay strong Calvin. Love from England.
I love that take the time to tell us some of your personal experiences, we all have hard things that we go through. My coming out experience sounds very similar. When I came out, my parents are very religious, so they had a hard long talk to me about it. They wanted me to change who I was and. Your schooling through high school sounds so awful and I'm so sorry for that. I've never had a first boyfriend. And how your best friend first reacted is basically how my whole family is. I have people that call me names at work, but most of them were really accepting. Thank you for sharing your experience! It really helps others come out too.
thankyou for sharing this video Calvin, you are a very brave and honest young man! I have tears in my eyes for you.this can be a shitty world we live in but its such a better place with good men like you in it! I hope your family wake up and realise what they are missing by not embracing the whole you.i will subscribe now and follow your fun videos and wish you all the good things in life as after all you've had to endure you deserve it my friend!
A heart felt and brave video. I came out many years ago and had a, relatively (for the time) good experience. Your story explained to me why some find it so hard (but then, I have never lived in a small (religious) town). Anonymity in the city is easier, but doing it your way exposes some to something they wouldn't otherwise experience. Hopefully, after a few experiences, they may learn something! Stay strong! So pleased you could share this for those that follow us into a new and better life!
Literally crying right now. Thank you so much for doing this Calvin. I have struggled with this for years and it's hard because I recall myself as a Christian. I went to a church youth group for almost a year and I could tell I was being discriminated against. I feel like the preference might always be a struggle for me and that really, really scares me. But, seeing you being yourself and getting through it, gives me a little hope. Thank you for being yourself Calvin. You're such an inspiration.
Really sorry to hear about your experience :( I find it hard to understand how parents can do that to their own children. It's like hitting a puppy, and the little pup can't understand why it's being punished. Stay strong bro, it sounds like you're pretty robust and you will thrive no matter what
Very important story. You went through very very rough times and many can relate. It is of immense value. So sorry you had to go through all that and that, much of it (family) is still unresolved (in difference to other many video stories out there - hence it’s importance). You braved through courageously. Thank you for sharing.
Thanks for your video. I got outed when I was in California. I was very involved in a church growing up too. I came out to my family and feel I have been the past 2 years. I got locked out for 2 days and basically disowned because of their Mormon beliefs. The emotional abuse and lack of acceptance for my boyfriend has been really hard. Thanks for your video, it comforts me to know that you also had a rough time. I am not sure I want to visit for Christmas. I hurt so much inside. I feel that I may never be able to share my joy with them. Thanks for showing the world that it is Very Hard to come out and comes at Great Sacrifice. I love my boyfriend for supporting me. I hope there comes a time when our type of Love will be viewed as Love.
Be brave, sweetheart - there are those who throw names at us and they are the ones who need help and who are actually the ones who have been indoctrinated. Love yourself and keep growing as you've done. I came out in the 70s in South Australia and on national TV. There are some who haven't coped to this day - but they are the the ones who have not shared in all the joy and love and beauty that I found in the hearts of a great many more accepting and truly wonderful people. They are my true family and not those who, despite parenting me have lost the son they could have loved. Never fear - we all admire and love you. Thanks for your Video.
You are just so cute and sweet. I can't imagine what you went through, I'm so sorry. I just want to give you a hug. Sounds like things are much better for you now and hope only the best for you.
G'day Calvin, this is a great video. Do not remove it. I think it is important for others considering coming out to be able to see that although their family may not react positively to their sexuality they can/will still have a happy life surrounded by others who truly accept them for who they are. You are a very brave and inspiring guy.
I have watched tons of coming out vids, but yours is the first I identify with the most. Your family sounds exactly like mine. We go to an Apostolic church 4 or more times a week. I can't wait to be able to afford to get out on my own. Thanks for sharing your experience. It helps knowing others out there have been through what is in my near future.
Thank you Calvin for your authenticity in your story. I am 27 and your experience is eerily close to mine and the reason I don't feel comfortable being fully open and honest with my family. I've reconciled my faith and sexuality but my family is very religious and I'm scared of the possible rejection, the shame and guilt they'll force upon me and how different our relationships will be. I see it eat away at me and deteriorate my well-being not feeling like I can be fully open with everyone. Your story however helps me to realize I am not the only one with this experience and helps me to know when I am ready, whatever happens I'm not alone and I'll make it out in one piece no matter how bruised and battered.
Hey, Calvin! Thanks for sharing your story! I'm 18 and I was raised in a really conservative catholic household and that is good because taught me a lot of good things but also really bad because I, eventually, will have to leave my family because they just won't accept me for who I am! I'm really not ready to leave them and I don't know if I'll ever be! I'm so tired of not being able to be myself with people and always afraid of people finding out all my secrets (there's not a second in my day that I don't feel stressed...)! I really don't know what to do... Thanks for your videos! Bye! Peace!
this is a powerful story and i think your right most the stores we hear on here are all good but there are ones like yours that are not so good and i for one would like to say thank you for telling this you will help a lot of ppl . no matter what you are loved always remember that
from all the coming out videos ive watched this far this one is the nearest to how my story goes, i also grew up in a very Christian family i never had a boyfriend but also because my mom doesnt accept it really shes meh with it we dont talk about it. so i totally understand how you feel and this video brought back a few emotions thats heart touching.
Thank you for sharing your story. Similar story, except my dad was dead before I came out. My mom ran me out of the house in the same way. I lived in my car for a couple of weeks, until my BF and I found a place to live. Always be true to yourself, it hurts when the family turns against you, my mom finally came around and we became closer. Be strong!
Oh, you have had the worst experience, you're so strong despite it. People don't understand how difficult it is to go against everything you've ever been taught and everything you've ever known because you don't fit in with that ideology! I wish you all the best in the future, stick to your guns, you will make the world a better place I'm sure of it! :)
Calvin, first I just want to hug you and tell you that you are loved very much. My 16 year old is gay and I love him very much, he didn't come out to me I actually outed him, he has 4 brothers all older and they all love him just as much as before, he has a boyfriend who we have all accepted as part of our family as his family is similar to yours where they think he can be fixed. Calvin the one thing I would really like to say to you is that there is a lot more love and support for you than you realise, I have just come across your channel and know that you're a special person and beautiful young man and an inspiration to others, I don't care whether you gay or straight you are just a beautiful person who deserves the best in life like everyone else.
what a great mom! mine "accepted" me initially per se, but over the last 15 yrs, it declined...they retired Chgo to Arizona, joined a new Catholic church & none of the family ever ask who I'm dating or if I'm in a relationship or a anything related to gay events. Living in Ft Lauderdale is plenty reason for them to make such cross-country, conversational inquires! Hope your son is still with his bf!
I was just watching your video again, it's been a month since I watched it the first time. It's just so heart wrenching to hear your story about how your own family treats you. I don't know why supposed "Christians" are always the most judgemental of everyone. I know Jesus loves you and accepts you as you are and sees you as perfect and complete. That's the nature of God and forgiveness...salvation...ect. Don't ever change one bit. Your awesome and very inspirational to me and others. Your story gives me strength. Love is the key and that's what makes you strong and amazing. Even after being treated like you have been you still love your mom and family and that's just incredible. That's true Christianity and spirituality.!!!
OMG im on the same Noah boat it suucks!!! i have christlike parents that i love but i have created this wall that i cant open up to them without being mad(its gotten easier). they love me and i know it but they will NEVER except the fact that i like guys... i feel ur pain its hard but im much happier after i told them. we have those dark times but i can always see the light at the end of the tunnel. I still have a personal relationship with jesus its not as stong as I hope it could be but it'll get better. your trully AWESOME im a 22 yr old that lives in texas and i've got mad love for you man. stay BOLD
Hey Calvin, I'm really proud of you! And thanks for making this video, it really gave me a broader insight. I just wanted to say, I am Catholic but I do not believe that religion should interfere with our personal opinions and life style (as it should be accepting and flexible) - I hope one day, people will learn to accept the fact that we love who we love, no matter the gender because that shouldn't be an issue. Stay strong!
Hi Calvin, thanks for sharing your story! The few I've seen all had happy endings, like their family just accepted straightaway. I have been contemplating coming out recently as a Bisexual, because I have decided to get baptised and I didn't want to have to hide anything. However, I CANNOT imagine what reaction my family will have, especially my dad who never believed the idea of being born gay and I didn't want him to use bisexuality to be his "evidence" that it's a passing phase for me or something. God bless and stay strong! Big thanks for this vid, really
Hi Calvin! Your story really touched me, thank's for sharing, it's very encouraging! I still can't believe that there are still parts on the world where you can't be yourself! Just never give up! :) Lotta love from switzerland
Thank you for doing this video CALVIN. Your situation, and you openly telling it I am sure will help some. I would think many are going through what you did. Again, Thank you. Mark
This is one of the best coming out videos this to this day, after a year of it being up. It helped me a lot coming out to my friends and my high school!
This video really spoke to me and I was truly shocked by some of your experiences. I respect you for making the decisions that you have made with your family and everything, and I wish you the best.
Thanks for having the courage to be yourself and share your story - even though (or, especially since) it's not all rainbows and unicorns like a lot of the stories on RUclips. You are a great example for those of us who have had rough experiences with our relatives. Keep your heart open to your family, but don't make excuses for people who are mean-spirited and willfully ignorant. They lose out by not sharing in your life.
You made me cry here. Not fair! I thought my coming out in an evangelical family was tough. Your story made mine look like a tea party. The sad part for me is that this happened to you in the 21st century. I came out in 1982. I know things get better, but these sad stories continue. I created my life 3,000 miles away from my family. They're accepting and all, but it's been an emotional roller coaster. I wish you all good things. No one deserves the treatment you received. You're a very strong man.
Thank you Calvin for sharing this story. It's obvious coming out was a very hard time for you but also obvious your beautiful nature has buoyed you through. I'm sure this video has helped many others have strength during their hard times
I don't know if you still read comments anymore but you are such a genuinely brave and strong human being, even though you have been threw alot you are still brave enough to tell nearly 100,000 people your story which is honestly amazing. I hope that your family will come around one day and you will be able to have a healthy relationship with them but until then dont sweat it if they won't except it they are missing out in having you in their lives. Stay strong Calvin:)
I came out to my mother and that was the biggest mistake of my life. The friends I had told that I was gay all supported me but she called me horrible things 'till this very day. My mother is the only bully in my life right now which breaks my heart because I needed her support the most. I'm now living with this but I don't know what to do. I feel shitty everyday and it's killing me inside.
=( I'm so, so sorry. I will never understand a 'parent' who could do something like that. My dad wasn't happy about it but we just don't talk about it and we act normal. I'll have to confront him again eventually but anyway. It sucks, and your situation is even worse. Just make sure to lean on their friends for support. Hopefully she'll come around in time but unless she does, don't let her get to you. You may have to distance yourself from her if you can. Don't let it 'destroy you'.
Mimit, so sorry. Her job as mother is to love you no matter what though. You're still the same person she loved before, but now she has a more intimate awareness of who you are. Would she be willing to listen to how hard it was to come out and how much trust you had in her that has been betrayed somewhat. I hope it can get better. Even If she does not become more ok with it, it will still get better as you get older and more independent and know yourself better and build a supportive community of friends. Use online and real world groups. Maybe see if she would go with you to an LGBT-positive therapist (not a gay-hating/conversion therapy suggesting religious one? If so find one yourself.). Just some ideas... find out what exactly it is about you being gay that makes them unhappy. And if they can only come out with "the bible" then there are plenty of cases to make point that god loves everyone no matter what, and some anti-gay interpretations are down to modern religion and their choice about what to believe/follow - plenty of other crazy things in bible we don't do now. If worried about you having a family or being hurt by others cos of it then those can all be mitigated by friends and loved ones and her job to protect you while young enough. Surrogacy/adoption/... options if you even want a family when older.
I'm sorry that coming out has been so difficult for you, but it's very inspirational that way you have overcome and learned to be your self! you deserve love and happiness and I hope you've found it or it finds you soon! All the best to you
You add a complimentary view to those who had positive experiences..Bravo..you prepare some for the family difficulties that are a real potential when orientation is announced. May you prosper and be happy..you have endured! :) Jack
my heart goes out to you, i can relate to everything you just said. just be strong and know that even if our parents can't accept us, we can choose to accept them and their limitations.
I'm scared of coming out because I know that when I do, my parents and most of family will react the same way as yours. I'm sorry for you, but I'm also glad that you're doing good now! And you are actually the first one that I see that doesn't have a good coming out experience, and I thank you for sharing that story.
Thank you Calvin! Love is unconditional, so it is clear to me that your family doesn't love you, but they certainly have lost an opportunity in rejecting you. I can see that the names you were called are still hurting you; please look in the mirror and give yourself the love you have been denied. Your compassion for your family is really a good lesson for all of us, and, in the long run will win you respect and help you heal. A very good video from a brave person helping others to live better.
Hi Calvin, Nice job giving your story. I'm sure that it has helped many people and will help more as time goes on. Many people are caught up in situations like you were and feel hopeless. Not only do they not always fully understand why they are gay but then to have judgmental "friends/family" members turn on them is so disheartening. Adding the component of trying to follow the Lord add's to the pressure. Anywho... thank you for working through it, and even being able to understand those that should have shown love to you. That says a lot about your character. You call your video "mopey and blah," I thought it was very heartfelt. "Some" people watching will know firsthand what you went through and will draw strength from it. Thanks.
It is so amazing to me that this boy's story is not unlike the experience of young boys from the 60's and 70's...I thought we were more advanced than this in this day and age...he may as well have been born in 1950 with the experience he has had.
Calvin, I just happened on your vlog and I'm so glad that I did. Btw, just had to subscribe! Thank you for sharing your story. You are such an admirable young man who God loves very much and He is proud of you. Please know that your story is an inspiration to many and that your forgiveness and patience with your parents' attitude shows the kind of heart that you truly have. I hope that they will one day learn from you the true meaning of Christianity. I'm like, three times your age, but hearing your story brought back all of the similar experiences that I had in school. It's so disappointing that the bullying is still prevalent. But here you are on the other side of all of that. Bravo!! Though you have to keep moving forward with your own life, I know how sad it is to not be able to share your joys and your life with your family. It's been a while since you posted, but if you're still having trouble, and the problem seems to be with their misunderstanding of SO much of the Bible and our faith, please take the time to check out a couple of websites. One is "Would Jesus Discriminate?", which has a slew of sermons by their gay, partnered Reverend Jeff Miner. Additionally in the Episcopal church we had an openly gay, partnered bishop, Gene Robinson, who has some awesome presentations on RUclips. So check him out as well. I'm sure that you're also aware of the Gay Christian Network, which may be of some help in breaking through the barriers some of your family has. Anyway, sorry for the long novel, but I wanted to let you know how valuable and important you are to so many. Sending you love and prayers for a wonderful, happy and fulfilling life. You deserve it! God's peace.
What a story... your family is clearly missing out on someone full of light & kindness. Continue to cling to your friends - ie, the family you choose. :) Thank you for sharing your story... it will undoubtedly touch & help many others going through similar situations. All the best to you.
HI Calvin! :) It's my first time watching you and I usually don't do this but I just wanted to thank you for sharing your coming out story online. It takes a lot of courage to do so and I hope one day your family can truly love and accept you for who you are. I know it'll take time, but know that you've got our back! You just got yourself a new subscriber! Haha. Keep it up. :3
I feel your pain Calvin. My family is very similar to yours when it comes to the subject of being gay. Comedy moment, I came out to my parents over a pork sandwich when my mother started yelling at me for stupid stuff and the subject came up. I was thrown out of the house, called and told so many things it hurts just thinking about it. Finally they told me I could come home if I "Prayed the Gay away" and I accepted. It was the worst feeling in my life having to stand there and tell them that I would "Change my ways". To this day they still believe that I prayed the gay away. My biggest regret is going back into the closet and if I could do it all over I probably would. No parent should make their child feel or go through what some of us have. A parents is supposed to love their child unconditionally, not make terms and agreements. Anyways, thank you for sharing! Don't take this the wrong way when I say I find it a relief to find someone who went through some of the same things I did when coming out. Many blessings to you and any boyfriend you are with!
I was raised in a similar house hold, very involved in church as well, so i know how hard that can be. Well done man! I know you've helped so many people with this video! xx
Just a horror story, what a shame but what a character builder for yourself. This was hard to watch but very much necessary and informative. I'm 71 and it would have been impossible to come out in the 50,s all the strength to you and hope many more watch this. thanks it didn't sound easy for you.
I was really moved by your video and I feel so so sorry for your mom and your dad, because you seem such a great guy. It's too bad that they can see the person you are beyond your sexuality. I'm gay as well and I have a very supportive family and I cannot fully understand your pain, but I can feel the pain in your words. Well, I'm sending love from Brazil because you are who you are and they will understand onde day that they will have wasted a whole life hating one thing that means nothing. Have a great life, a great husband and be happy. Love. XX
Thanks for the video! Good on you, I admire your courage and am so sorry you have to go through the problems with your family. You don't deserve that. I hope everything works out and that you can be truly happy being who you are.
Calvin your video provokes so much anger towards your mother! She sounds horrible and seems her goal is just to make you have a miserable life. I am so sorry your coming out was hell. I hope you cut off people who want to destroy you even if it is your mother or family as holding on to this and the past will only make you a broken person who will evolve to be jaded etc. LET IT GO! Let people go who are not good for you. You are at the best days of anyone's life being young so just get on with life and be happy! I really hope you keep being positive.
Thank you for making this video Calvin! You're an amazing role model and an inspiration. I wish the best for you. Stay strong. You're special and amazing, and nobody can ever take that away from you.
The reaction of your family is atrocious, this is so sad. I don't understand how you managed to still talk to them, but they don't deserve this. At all. You're very, very brave, and I think you touch a lot of people by doing this. You're amazing ! Carry on, and thank you.
My heart goes out to you, just remember, love and respect is earned, if your family does not accept you, God will,He understands, after all, He Knows about pain and how to really love, I can see the hurt in your eyes, may real love be your victory over your family that obviously only want love in their christian community, and I am sure that there is more bad things around them as the love that lives in your heart.I am 53 years old, and listening to your story was as if I was telling my life's story,I've been through it, you will to.God Bless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This made me realize how lucky I am to have people and family who accept and love me for who I am. I'm sorry what happened to you and I hope and pray that your family may open their eyes and hearts and you may find happiness.
The damage religon does is appalling.
Your mother abused you. She ought to be ashamed of herself. People that put religion over their own families are completely despicable. You are smart. Put your knowledge to work for you.
+Bruce Wayne what are u laughing at ur parents are dead
Hey MoM Turn that Hollier than Now Cross UPSIDE DOWN AND RIDE IT God makes no mistakes Bible beater
It's so depressing, I just hate religious fanatism T.T
It's sad that some people think we actually choose who we like, they don't choose to be straight. We don't choose to be gay. We were born this way and I'm honestly so proud of you. Thank you so much for your story :)
SO many people, like you said, will always be here for you. Me included. I love your videos and you seem like a awesome person.
My mom keeps hinting at it. "Is there something you want to tell me?" "You know I'll always love you no matter what, right?" She told me the other day that she doesn't care if I brought home a man from the moon because as long as I'm happy, she'll be happy...and I STILL can't get the words to come out of my mouth.
When you're ready and its the right time it will come out easily. One day hopefully in our life time I hope that its as easy as saying you're straight. Good Luck! :)
***** Ethan C i think that its a lot easier to tell a friend first
(a girl) thats what i did. girls are usulay a lot more accepting
zack boos I actually have since come out to my sister! I'm just waiting for a decent time to tell my mom. Things have been a bit chaotic for the last few months, and when things calm down we'll tell her together. I feel so much better about telling her after telling my sister. I think it was just that first hurdle of admitting it to someone else for the first time. She was awesome. I swear she already knew and had a speech planned out for when I told her. haha... Any way I completely agree with you. I think a lot of it just has to do with the fact that girls understand how we could like penis, to put it bluntly. Just how I don't see the appeal to vagina or boobs, straight guys don't understand how or why we like guys. And I think guys are more accepting of lesbians because they do understand why they like women. In the words of Macklemore, "America the brave still fears what we don't know." It's just human nature to fear what we don't understand, unfortunately.
ya... its really hard to do it... i would have never done it if i hadn't seen this one youtuber a year ago... i think it was like exiledleopard1?
My mom does the same thing lol
calvin, what a tough story to tell, so thank you for sharing. terry and i have been together for 33 years and coming out in the 80's wasn't easy, but the quality of person you are inside is what helps people understand things a little bit better and you have discovered that. whether you feel like it or not, you are a stellar role model and i wish you the best of good fortune, long life, and happiness. hugs, brooks
I just want to let you guys know I still read all the comments. :) There's a lot of them, but I read every one and thank every single one of you for your kind words. It makes me so happy inside from your words of encouragement. And to anyone out there who is in contemplation of coming out, I hope all goes well for you the day that you do. Much love.
Hi, good video, I´m from Argentina, I`m twenty eight, I´m a bisexualy. my english is bad, do you speak español? well good luck
your so hot
Aww Calvin your video touched my heart, you are strong, you know the ones who love you the most may need more time grow. So it's nothing wrong with you, I know how you feel I came out to my dad and he wasn't supportive at all. But you are loved, so don't feel bad. :)
Tryst T Sorry you are such a troll
Tryst T What do you mean by "chill out"? That you are joking, or that chilling out can make a guy less gay? I don't get it!
Came from a similar background. Graduated H.S. shortly before my 17th birthday and joined the Air Force when I turned 17. You will never get fundamentalists to accept you and you can forget that. Live your life the way that you are and remember that God, in his infinite wisdom, made you who you are and he did not make any mistakes. I am 76 now and had a 36 year relationship which only ended with his death of a heart attack when he was 59. You seem to be a bright, intelligent and handsome young man (from your video). Life is precious, live it to the fullest and if your relatives don't like it, tough! They are the ones missing out by not really knowing you.
Don D, though I had a better experience than Calvin, I also enlisted in the Air Force at 17 & graduated HS at 17. After Basic/Tech Training, I started f/t @ IL State University (since I was serving 6 yrs in Air Nat'l Guard + TDY active duty tours every summer semester: 1 in The Pentagon, 1 on Andrew's, 2 in Knoxville & a KC-135 air-refueling mission over Cuba to Grand Cayman for 4 days. Plus college tuition was free). I feel terrible 4 Calvin & others who have their ostrich head stuck in the ground & dont hear anything but their preachers biblical B.S. Hope u enjoyed USAF.
Awww stay strong! You're amazing!
I just want to say it was a privilege to hear your story. Trust me in saying that your journey will resonate to anybody who is contemplating coming out. Even though the acceptance of family is important, nobody can take away your strength and courage if you don't get it. I can relate in that my father couldn't accept me. It has been a couple of decades and I am not sitting and waiting for that to happen. Life is way too short.
Your story is so inspirational but also so sad. Attitudes in the U.S. are much improved since I was young, but you remind us that not every teen today has an easy road to come out. All I could think while watching this is "Whatever doesn't kill us makes us stronger." I'm now a subscriber and wish I could be your friend.
Very moving indeed, I nearly shed a tear near the end. While I live the very open and diverse city of Liverpool in England, I'm still on the road to coming out to my friends. I've told my inner family but they're pretty neutral about it and have told me not to tell anyone, it's something that they choose not to talk about so I have to keep my thoughts to myself. Good luck for the future my friend and thanks for sharing this, you've helped a lot of people.
watching this video moved me in a way i can't really explain. i'm Bi and am fully out now, and i do consider myself relatively lucky because i had the support of close friends during my time of need. i am completely open about my sexuality at school and most people i've come across have been fine with it, those that mattered were fine with it. i do relate to you in the way that i grew up in a very religious household, my parents are quite narrow-minded people, unfortunately. me and my dad have never spoken a word about this topic to this day, and i honestly would prefer it that way. it was one of the most difficult things telling my mom, and although she definitely had a much better response in comparison to your mother, she didn't exactly take it well either. i honestly don't think she ever will... and it's hard thinking about that, things like this are hard to accept. which is why i admire you so much for still being able to love your mom even after all thats happened, because i know that i wouldn't be able to do the same...
i know i've written so much but i'd be really grateful if you could post a response?
thanks
I'm glad that most people you come across are fine with it. It's good to surround yourself with such support. My dad and I have never really spoken about the topic either. It's awkward grounds that'd lead to a talk that would just degrade me even more, so I never bring it up either. Just live life for what it is, keep a smile on your face, and when you find the one that you love and means the world to you, treasure them. Because they'll be yours and nothing your parents may say about having a same-sex spouse should lessen your love for your future spouse. Perhaps you'll be braver than me and introduce them to your family and they'll come around to the idea. I hope I can when the day comes. Much love. xoxo
***** Hey Calvin, I think you know that I'm one of if not your biggest fan(s) and only wish the best for you. You might consider penning a coming out letter to your dad. This would allow you to take all the time you need and cover all the bases you want. When complete you can give it to him when you're ready or never, but it's available if you need it. Go watch Grant's coming out letter to his mom on his youtube channel Iwantacceptance and see what you think. On an unrelated subject, I was a bad boy!! I decided you needed more exposure, so I hyped your 12 gay of Christmas vid on other channels where I'm subscribed. If you get crap from youtube or youtubers you can truthfully say you new nothing and found out after the fact it was the doing of one of you physco subs.
Really inspiring. You went through, what appears, a really difficult "coming out". It could inspire so many people that have a very strong Religious Family and are fearful of telling their family.
You are an amazing guy, be strong and even if it was difficult and there are times where it isn't easy for you (with the family situation), just remember you have your friends and subscribers here to support you!
Thank you so much for posting this. As you said there are so many videos on youtube about guys coming out and having an easy-going experience. It was so enlightening and inspiring to hear you talk about your personal experience. I know it's quite possibly futile but I hope your family can one day see you for who you are and accept you to some degree cause you deserve at the very least that. You're one courageous dude :)
Your story is heartbreaking, I hope things are better with your family today. Acceptance was never an issue for me and I came out in the '70's. Much love and happiness. ❤️
This made me cry, I'm so glad that you've come so far, especially with a family like the one you have. Stay strong Calvin
I am sorry that your family has treated you so poorly. Your story is powerful and one that needs to be heard. You will marry the man of your dreams someday, and I hope your family comes to their senses and fully supports you both.
#HappyNationalComingOutDay Remember, only do so when you're ready and feel safe. You're brave and I hope the best for you. I'm happy this video has helped some of you out there. :) Much love, Calvin.
Just come across your video. I don't know how to word this but well done on telling your story because it has already, and will continue to, help so many people :)
Wow, it takes a lot to share this kind of story, Calvin. Thank you for your courage and advice. I can relate a lot since I'm in a similar situation but I hope things by now have improved with your family. Even if there's little progress, it's something. Thinking more about it,... more than normal, I think everyone of us is unique (with faults and virtues, nobody is perfect) so we should live our lives in the way that makes most sense to us, being true to ourselves and others.
It's important though, like you say, to do it when it's safe.
Calvin, thanks for posting this video. Like you I'm not close to my family (not because of anything specific, it's just how it is). My friends are the number 1 most important thing in my life. Many people find that hard to believe but unfortunately all families aren't emotionally close.
I had those same fears, had a BF, but could not say, raised Christian and had family try to change me. It's comforting to know I'm not alone and someone had a similar journey as I've struggle with!
+Calvin Bremer Thanks for posting the video Calvin, it's a very good video, and you give very good advice ... Have a great day! :-)
Omg I'm so sorry you had to deal with so much of other people's baggage in your coming out process. You handled that with such amazing strength! Much love to you!
Calvin I am sorry you went through that with your mom. I pray you are doing much better now.
hey calvin, you're a really brave dude, keep move on !! :D All people do not accept you as you are, they just don't deserve you and about your familly and church too Never forget that ''God is mercy and forgiveness! he loves all the children, you're a child of god'' Thks to share this moment of your life!! you're a sweet guy, full of love and compassion !! bye take care calvin!!
PS: i'm sorry for the english, i'm french so not always easy to write with no errors!! :D
Your English is just fine.
Wow, this just hit me hard. My family is the same way as yours and that's the reason I haven't come out. It's getting hard though, to feel trapped, to feel lonely. Here I am really late at night just trying to find some understanding so thank you. Your story truly gives me strength. It's so hard to even write this because I don't see an end to my problems but I know that one day I won't be able to hide anymore. I just hope my family is even a little more understanding.
After five years from when you posted youyr comment, I really hope things have worked out for you.
You know what Calvin? I am very proud of you! I had a similar experience some time ago and my mom and i have a very good relationship even though we can not speak about my personal life! As for my father, we try to make baby steps for him to accept me. Stay strong, believe in yourself and enjoy giving and receiving love with the people you really want to! I send you all my love and support. G
I am so incredibly proud of you for being so unbelievably brave, being able to accept yourself the way you are even in the difficult situation that you have been in, and I am so sorry that your family and your mum in particular reacted the way she did. It is so courageous of you to make this video, and I absolutely admire you for believing in yourself, breaking away from your family, finding your own place, making your own path with your friends and the people that believe in you. You deserve to live life as the perfect and wonderful and unique person you are, without having to change yourself to please anyone else, and I dearly hope that you live and love happily, and have a loving prosperous life, and find love, and marry a man someday, despite your circumstances. The fact that you have had the strength to live through, film and upload this is truly so admirable of you and i honestly admire and love you so much for this. Thank you so much for sharing your story, as I know it has helped me, to know that you can do it, and I'm sure it will help many others also. I love you so much, and think you are incredible, and wonderful, and I hope you have an incredible life. Good luck with the rest of your journey
Calvin.... Great video. Thanks for sharing. Sorry your coming out didn't go so well. It broke my heart when you said the way your mom treated you. You seem like a great guy. Hope things are better in 2015. God dose love you. Don't let anyone tell you diffrently. Please keep staying positive. Lot more people accept you then don't. Stay positive my friend. God bless.
Calvin , you should be very proud of yourself ! the coming out process is not easy for the majority of us , yes , there are many great and envious stories we get to hear but we don't get to choose our families and how they react and treat us ? your opinion of who you are is more important than what anyone else thinks , including your parents . I hope you are in a better place with your parents ( although i'm guessing not by the sadness in your voice when you talk about them ?) Always remember to love yourself , when that happens it makes it easier for someone else to love you as well . Good luck in all you do . thanks for posting and your honesty .
LOVED this and its very inspirational!! It DOES get better!
Calvin, your story is so inspiring and I'm really glad you decided to share it. The world needs people like you, people who are strong enough to live through any bad experiences that may happen to them, who are brave enough to stand up for themselves and give others faith. I can only say I'm thankful to live in a world where people as amazing, beautiful and inspiring as you are exist.
Much love xx
I also crushed on Jonathan Taylor Thomas (JTT) too back then as well and even met him my senior year! Enjoyed your story and know it's been awhile, but found it very similar to mine and wanted to reach out to you!
Hi saw you on camcameras channel and your coming out story is closer to my own than many others on youtube. Thanks for sharing. Not every family is supporting and caring unfortunately . Growing up in a Evangelical Christian home with a certain set of beliefs makes it hard to reconcile the things you are taught and how things are in real life. I'm glad that you were able to find yourself and a support system with friends.
I cannot even imagine how tough it was for you... I'm proud of you and of the fact that you still love your mum, I hope one day she realizes her mistake and what she's been missing out. I hove everything's going well :)
Hi Calvin. I just want to say that you are an incredible human being. I am so sorry that you had such a negative coming out experience but I'm a big believer that everything happens for a reason. This will, and probably has, made you a very strong person. You have given me and countless of other people inspiration to just accept who they are. Times are changing, and fast. I am privileged that I was able to see this at a time when I and so many other people need more people like you in the world. Stay strong Calvin. Love from England.
I love that take the time to tell us some of your personal experiences, we all have hard things that we go through. My coming out experience sounds very similar. When I came out, my parents are very religious, so they had a hard long talk to me about it. They wanted me to change who I was and. Your schooling through high school sounds so awful and I'm so sorry for that. I've never had a first boyfriend. And how your best friend first reacted is basically how my whole family is. I have people that call me names at work, but most of them were really accepting. Thank you for sharing your experience! It really helps others come out too.
thankyou for sharing this video Calvin, you are a very brave and honest young man! I have tears in my eyes for you.this can be a shitty world we live in but its such a better place with good men like you in it! I hope your family wake up and realise what they are missing by not embracing the whole you.i will subscribe now and follow your fun videos and wish you all the good things in life as after all you've had to endure you deserve it my friend!
A heart felt and brave video. I came out many years ago and had a, relatively (for the time) good experience. Your story explained to me why some find it so hard (but then, I have never lived in a small (religious) town). Anonymity in the city is easier, but doing it your way exposes some to something they wouldn't otherwise experience. Hopefully, after a few experiences, they may learn something!
Stay strong! So pleased you could share this for those that follow us into a new and better life!
Literally crying right now. Thank you so much for doing this Calvin. I have struggled with this for years and it's hard because I recall myself as a Christian. I went to a church youth group for almost a year and I could tell I was being discriminated against. I feel like the preference might always be a struggle for me and that really, really scares me. But, seeing you being yourself and getting through it, gives me a little hope. Thank you for being yourself Calvin. You're such an inspiration.
Omg you are so cute! Stay strong!
Andy.
Really sorry to hear about your experience :( I find it hard to understand how parents can do that to their own children. It's like hitting a puppy, and the little pup can't understand why it's being punished. Stay strong bro, it sounds like you're pretty robust and you will thrive no matter what
It's very sad to see that this sort of stuff still happens. Glad you got through it!
Very important story. You went through very very rough times and many can relate. It is of immense value. So sorry you had to go through all that and that, much of it (family) is still unresolved (in difference to other many video stories out there - hence it’s importance). You braved through courageously. Thank you for sharing.
I know that you recorded this a long time ago, but thank you. Thanks for helping others. I hope your life today is going well. Sending a hug your way!
Thanks for your video. I got outed when I was in California. I was very involved in a church growing up too. I came out to my family and feel I have been the past 2 years. I got locked out for 2 days and basically disowned because of their Mormon beliefs. The emotional abuse and lack of acceptance for my boyfriend has been really hard. Thanks for your video, it comforts me to know that you also had a rough time. I am not sure I want to visit for Christmas. I hurt so much inside. I feel that I may never be able to share my joy with them. Thanks for showing the world that it is Very Hard to come out and comes at Great Sacrifice. I love my boyfriend for supporting me. I hope there comes a time when our type of Love will be viewed as Love.
Be brave, sweetheart - there are those who throw names at us and they are the ones who need help and who are actually the ones who have been indoctrinated. Love yourself and keep growing as you've done. I came out in the 70s in South Australia and on national TV. There are some who haven't coped to this day - but they are the the ones who have not shared in all the joy and love and beauty that I found in the hearts of a great many more accepting and truly wonderful people. They are my true family and not those who, despite parenting me have lost the son they could have loved. Never fear - we all admire and love you. Thanks for your Video.
You are just so cute and sweet. I can't imagine what you went through, I'm so sorry. I just want to give you a hug. Sounds like things are much better for you now and hope only the best for you.
G'day Calvin, this is a great video. Do not remove it. I think it is important for others considering coming out to be able to see that although their family may not react positively to their sexuality they can/will still have a happy life surrounded by others who truly accept them for who they are. You are a very brave and inspiring guy.
I have watched tons of coming out vids, but yours is the first I identify with the most. Your family sounds exactly like mine. We go to an Apostolic church 4 or more times a week. I can't wait to be able to afford to get out on my own. Thanks for sharing your experience. It helps knowing others out there have been through what is in my near future.
JS I hope you are free now to be who you truly are.
Thank you Calvin for your authenticity in your story. I am 27 and your experience is eerily close to mine and the reason I don't feel comfortable being fully open and honest with my family. I've reconciled my faith and sexuality but my family is very religious and I'm scared of the possible rejection, the shame and guilt they'll force upon me and how different our relationships will be. I see it eat away at me and deteriorate my well-being not feeling like I can be fully open with everyone. Your story however helps me to realize I am not the only one with this experience and helps me to know when I am ready, whatever happens I'm not alone and I'll make it out in one piece no matter how bruised and battered.
Hey, Calvin! Thanks for sharing your story! I'm 18 and I was raised in a really conservative catholic household and that is good because taught me a lot of good things but also really bad because I, eventually, will have to leave my family because they just won't accept me for who I am! I'm really not ready to leave them and I don't know if I'll ever be! I'm so tired of not being able to be myself with people and always afraid of people finding out all my secrets (there's not a second in my day that I don't feel stressed...)! I really don't know what to do... Thanks for your videos! Bye! Peace!
I so hope things are better for you now.
this is a powerful story and i think your right most the stores we hear on here are all good but there are ones like yours that are not so good and i for one would like to say thank you for telling this you will help a lot of ppl . no matter what you are loved always remember that
from all the coming out videos ive watched this far this one is the nearest to how my story goes, i also grew up in a very Christian family i never had a boyfriend but also because my mom doesnt accept it really shes meh with it we dont talk about it. so i totally understand how you feel and this video brought back a few emotions thats heart touching.
Thank you for sharing your story.
Similar story, except my dad was dead before I came out.
My mom ran me out of the house in the same way.
I lived in my car for a couple of weeks, until my BF and I found a place to live.
Always be true to yourself, it hurts when the family turns against you, my mom finally came around and we became closer. Be strong!
Oh, you have had the worst experience, you're so strong despite it. People don't understand how difficult it is to go against everything you've ever been taught and everything you've ever known because you don't fit in with that ideology! I wish you all the best in the future, stick to your guns, you will make the world a better place I'm sure of it! :)
I don't know if I could have went through all of the shit that you went through with your family. You have a great amount of strength
This is such a brilliant video. I hope one day I'll be comfortable enough to share my coming out story on my channel.
Haha, found this. Funny, I subscribed after seeing your coming out video...
This isn't spam. Why is this marked as spam...
***** haha! It's cool finding these old comments and seeing how I've grown :)
Calvin, first I just want to hug you and tell you that you are loved very much. My 16 year old is gay and I love him very much, he didn't come out to me I actually outed him, he has 4 brothers all older and they all love him just as much as before, he has a boyfriend who we have all accepted as part of our family as his family is similar to yours where they think he can be fixed. Calvin the one thing I would really like to say to you is that there is a lot more love and support for you than you realise, I have just come across your channel and know that you're a special person and beautiful young man and an inspiration to others, I don't care whether you gay or straight you are just a beautiful person who deserves the best in life like everyone else.
what a great mom! mine "accepted" me initially per se, but over the last 15 yrs, it declined...they retired Chgo to Arizona, joined a new Catholic church & none of the family ever ask who I'm dating or if I'm in a relationship or a anything related to gay events. Living in Ft Lauderdale is plenty reason for them to make such cross-country, conversational inquires! Hope your son is still with his bf!
I was just watching your video again, it's been a month since I watched it the first time. It's just so heart wrenching to hear your story about how your own family treats you. I don't know why supposed "Christians" are always the most judgemental of everyone. I know Jesus loves you and accepts you as you are and sees you as perfect and complete. That's the nature of God and forgiveness...salvation...ect. Don't ever change one bit. Your awesome and very inspirational to me and others. Your story gives me strength. Love is the key and that's what makes you strong and amazing. Even after being treated like you have been you still love your mom and family and that's just incredible. That's true Christianity and spirituality.!!!
OMG im on the same Noah boat it suucks!!! i have christlike parents that i love but i have created this wall that i cant open up to them without being mad(its gotten easier). they love me and i know it but they will NEVER except the fact that i like guys... i feel ur pain its hard but im much happier after i told them. we have those dark times but i can always see the light at the end of the tunnel. I still have a personal relationship with jesus its not as stong as I hope it could be but it'll get better. your trully AWESOME im a 22 yr old that lives in texas and i've got mad love for you man. stay BOLD
You will make a difference in someone's life. Stay strong and know that you are Loved.. Will💕
Hey Calvin, I'm really proud of you! And thanks for making this video, it really gave me a broader insight. I just wanted to say, I am Catholic but I do not believe that religion should interfere with our personal opinions and life style (as it should be accepting and flexible) - I hope one day, people will learn to accept the fact that we love who we love, no matter the gender because that shouldn't be an issue. Stay strong!
Hi Calvin, thanks for sharing your story! The few I've seen all had happy endings, like their family just accepted straightaway.
I have been contemplating coming out recently as a Bisexual, because I have decided to get baptised and I didn't want to have to hide anything. However, I CANNOT imagine what reaction my family will have, especially my dad who never believed the idea of being born gay and I didn't want him to use bisexuality to be his "evidence" that it's a passing phase for me or something.
God bless and stay strong! Big thanks for this vid, really
Hi Calvin! Your story really touched me, thank's for sharing, it's very encouraging! I still can't believe that there are still parts on the world where you can't be yourself!
Just never give up! :) Lotta love from switzerland
You make us all proud ! Sending lots of love your way !
You are such a great person and I respect you so much.
Thank you for doing this video CALVIN. Your situation, and you openly telling it I am sure will help some. I would think many are going through what you did. Again, Thank you. Mark
This is one of the best coming out videos this to this day, after a year of it being up. It helped me a lot coming out to my friends and my high school!
This video really spoke to me and I was truly shocked by some of your experiences. I respect you for making the decisions that you have made with your family and everything, and I wish you the best.
Thanks for having the courage to be yourself and share your story - even though (or, especially since) it's not all rainbows and unicorns like a lot of the stories on RUclips. You are a great example for those of us who have had rough experiences with our relatives. Keep your heart open to your family, but don't make excuses for people who are mean-spirited and willfully ignorant. They lose out by not sharing in your life.
You made me cry here. Not fair! I thought my coming out in an evangelical family was tough. Your story made mine look like a tea party. The sad part for me is that this happened to you in the 21st century. I came out in 1982. I know things get better, but these sad stories continue. I created my life 3,000 miles away from my family. They're accepting and all, but it's been an emotional roller coaster. I wish you all good things. No one deserves the treatment you received. You're a very strong man.
Wow. Thank you so much for sharing. Sorry to hear how bad it was. Glad to see you're on your own and holding together.
Thank you Calvin for sharing this story. It's obvious coming out was a very hard time for you but also obvious your beautiful nature has buoyed you through. I'm sure this video has helped many others have strength during their hard times
You are so strong. I admire you. Thank you so much for posting this. Don't give up, don't listen to them. They don't know anything! Thanks again.
I don't know if you still read comments anymore but you are such a genuinely brave and strong human being, even though you have been threw alot you are still brave enough to tell nearly 100,000 people your story which is honestly amazing. I hope that your family will come around one day and you will be able to have a healthy relationship with them but until then dont sweat it if they won't except it they are missing out in having you in their lives. Stay strong Calvin:)
I came out to my mother and that was the biggest mistake of my life. The friends I had told that I was gay all supported me but she called me horrible things 'till this very day. My mother is the only bully in my life right now which breaks my heart because I needed her support the most. I'm now living with this but I don't know what to do. I feel shitty everyday and it's killing me inside.
=( I'm so, so sorry. I will never understand a 'parent' who could do something like that. My dad wasn't happy about it but we just don't talk about it and we act normal. I'll have to confront him again eventually but anyway. It sucks, and your situation is even worse. Just make sure to lean on their friends for support. Hopefully she'll come around in time but unless she does, don't let her get to you. You may have to distance yourself from her if you can. Don't let it 'destroy you'.
I live with just my mom, and she hates it too. I know how much it hurts your heart... It hurts me too
Mimit, so sorry. Her job as mother is to love you no matter what though. You're still the same person she loved before, but now she has a more intimate awareness of who you are. Would she be willing to listen to how hard it was to come out and how much trust you had in her that has been betrayed somewhat. I hope it can get better. Even If she does not become more ok with it, it will still get better as you get older and more independent and know yourself better and build a supportive community of friends. Use online and real world groups. Maybe see if she would go with you to an LGBT-positive therapist (not a gay-hating/conversion therapy suggesting religious one? If so find one yourself.). Just some ideas... find out what exactly it is about you being gay that makes them unhappy. And if they can only come out with "the bible" then there are plenty of cases to make point that god loves everyone no matter what, and some anti-gay interpretations are down to modern religion and their choice about what to believe/follow - plenty of other crazy things in bible we don't do now. If worried about you having a family or being hurt by others cos of it then those can all be mitigated by friends and loved ones and her job to protect you while young enough. Surrogacy/adoption/... options if you even want a family when older.
This is a good video, Thanks for sharing your experience.
I'm sorry that coming out has been so difficult for you, but it's very inspirational that way you have overcome and learned to be your self! you deserve love and happiness and I hope you've found it or it finds you soon! All the best to you
You still are the same person who you were before coming out . Just know that you have a lot of support standing in your corner .
You add a complimentary view to those who had positive experiences..Bravo..you prepare some for the family difficulties that are a real potential when orientation is announced. May you prosper and be happy..you have endured! :) Jack
my heart goes out to you, i can relate to everything you just said. just be strong and know that even if our parents can't accept us, we can choose to accept them and their limitations.
I'm scared of coming out because I know that when I do, my parents and most of family will react the same way as yours. I'm sorry for you, but I'm also glad that you're doing good now! And you are actually the first one that I see that doesn't have a good coming out experience, and I thank you for sharing that story.
Thank you Calvin! Love is unconditional, so it is clear to me that your family doesn't love you, but they certainly have lost an opportunity in rejecting you. I can see that the names you were called are still hurting you; please look in the mirror and give yourself the love you have been denied. Your compassion for your family is really a good lesson for all of us, and, in the long run will win you respect and help you heal. A very good video from a brave person helping others to live better.
Hi Calvin,
Nice job giving your story. I'm sure that it has helped many people and will help more as time goes on. Many people are caught up in situations like you were and feel hopeless. Not only do they not always fully understand why they are gay but then to have judgmental "friends/family" members turn on them is so disheartening. Adding the component of trying to follow the Lord add's to the pressure.
Anywho... thank you for working through it, and even being able to understand those that should have shown love to you. That says a lot about your character.
You call your video "mopey and blah," I thought it was very heartfelt. "Some" people watching will know firsthand what you went through and will draw strength from it. Thanks.
It is so amazing to me that this boy's story is not unlike the experience of young boys from the 60's and 70's...I thought we were more advanced than this in this day and age...he may as well have been born in 1950 with the experience he has had.
Calvin, I just happened on your vlog and I'm so glad that I did. Btw, just had to subscribe! Thank you for sharing your story. You are such an admirable young man who God loves very much and He is proud of you. Please know that your story is an inspiration to many and that your forgiveness and patience with your parents' attitude shows the kind of heart that you truly have. I hope that they will one day learn from you the true meaning of Christianity. I'm like, three times your age, but hearing your story brought back all of the similar experiences that I had in school. It's so disappointing that the bullying is still prevalent. But here you are on the other side of all of that. Bravo!!
Though you have to keep moving forward with your own life, I know how sad it is to not be able to share your joys and your life with your family. It's been a while since you posted, but if you're still having trouble, and the problem seems to be with their misunderstanding of SO much of the Bible and our faith, please take the time to check out a couple of websites. One is "Would Jesus Discriminate?", which has a slew of sermons by their gay, partnered Reverend Jeff Miner. Additionally in the Episcopal church we had an openly gay, partnered bishop, Gene Robinson, who has some awesome presentations on RUclips. So check him out as well. I'm sure that you're also aware of the Gay Christian Network, which may be of some help in breaking through the barriers some of your family has.
Anyway, sorry for the long novel, but I wanted to let you know how valuable and important you are to so many. Sending you love and prayers for a wonderful, happy and fulfilling life. You deserve it! God's peace.
What a story... your family is clearly missing out on someone full of light & kindness. Continue to cling to your friends - ie, the family you choose. :) Thank you for sharing your story... it will undoubtedly touch & help many others going through similar situations. All the best to you.
HI Calvin! :) It's my first time watching you and I usually don't do this but I just wanted to thank you for sharing your coming out story online. It takes a lot of courage to do so and I hope one day your family can truly love and accept you for who you are. I know it'll take time, but know that you've got our back! You just got yourself a new subscriber! Haha. Keep it up. :3
I feel your pain Calvin. My family is very similar to yours when it comes to the subject of being gay. Comedy moment, I came out to my parents over a pork sandwich when my mother started yelling at me for stupid stuff and the subject came up. I was thrown out of the house, called and told so many things it hurts just thinking about it. Finally they told me I could come home if I "Prayed the Gay away" and I accepted. It was the worst feeling in my life having to stand there and tell them that I would "Change my ways". To this day they still believe that I prayed the gay away. My biggest regret is going back into the closet and if I could do it all over I probably would. No parent should make their child feel or go through what some of us have. A parents is supposed to love their child unconditionally, not make terms and agreements. Anyways, thank you for sharing! Don't take this the wrong way when I say I find it a relief to find someone who went through some of the same things I did when coming out. Many blessings to you and any boyfriend you are with!
I was raised in a similar house hold, very involved in church as well, so i know how hard that can be. Well done man! I know you've helped so many people with this video!
xx
Just a horror story, what a shame but what a character builder for yourself. This was hard to watch but very much necessary and informative. I'm 71 and it would have been impossible to come out in the 50,s all the strength to you and hope many more watch this. thanks it didn't sound easy for you.
I was really moved by your video and I feel so so sorry for your mom and your dad, because you seem such a great guy. It's too bad that they can see the person you are beyond your sexuality. I'm gay as well and I have a very supportive family and I cannot fully understand your pain, but I can feel the pain in your words. Well, I'm sending love from Brazil because you are who you are and they will understand onde day that they will have wasted a whole life hating one thing that means nothing. Have a great life, a great husband and be happy.
Love. XX
Thanks for sharing your story
Calvin. Thanks for sharing your coming out story. I appreciate you and hope the best for you. Bill
Thanks for the video! Good on you, I admire your courage and am so sorry you have to go through the problems with your family. You don't deserve that. I hope everything works out and that you can be truly happy being who you are.
Thanks for your honesty, Calvin...I can relate to your experience...I'm sure it will be very helpful for others going through the same things.
Calvin your video provokes so much anger towards your mother! She sounds horrible and seems her goal is just to make you have a miserable life. I am so sorry your coming out was hell. I hope you cut off people who want to destroy you even if it is your mother or family as holding on to this and the past will only make you a broken person who will evolve to be jaded etc. LET IT GO! Let people go who are not good for you. You are at the best days of anyone's life being young so just get on with life and be happy! I really hope you keep being positive.
Thank you for making this video Calvin! You're an amazing role model and an inspiration. I wish the best for you. Stay strong. You're special and amazing, and nobody can ever take that away from you.
The reaction of your family is atrocious, this is so sad. I don't understand how you managed to still talk to them, but they don't deserve this. At all.
You're very, very brave, and I think you touch a lot of people by doing this. You're amazing ! Carry on, and thank you.
My heart goes out to you, just remember, love and respect is earned, if your family does not accept you, God will,He understands, after all, He Knows about pain and how to really love, I can see the hurt in your eyes, may real love be your victory over your family that obviously only want love in their christian community, and I am sure that there is more bad things around them as the love that lives in your heart.I am 53 years old, and listening to your story was as if I was telling my life's story,I've been through it, you will to.God Bless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This made me realize how lucky I am to have people and family who accept and love me for who I am. I'm sorry what happened to you and I hope and pray that your family may open their eyes and hearts and you may find happiness.
Thank you so much for sharing this Calvin! This might give me the courage to come out myself.. Much love xo