I lost my daughter not seeing her 14 years. I was psychologically abused by my ex until I collapsed mentally. It almost led me to suicide.Lost everything....even went homeless. I took me years to recover...but I still have mental scars from this. Using a child as a weapon to destroy a parent is the worst.
+BinoDist terrible isn't it. how can a someone live with causing such sadness to another person. its a wound that never heals. I was recently given some photos of my daughter, she is now a young woman. I have missed her entire childhood,
This was painful to watch. I was ambushed regularly for 16 years. And, I never knew when the police would be waiting for me on some new false allegation of violence, stalking, threats, sex abuse of my own child, etc......
It is a vicious spiteful form of abuse. A narcissistic parent has so much hate and anger towards the other parent that they decide they are the only fit one to raise their children. It mostly occurs during family separations and custody battles. Once loving, kind respectful children
This is terrible, I’m a woman and my ex is keeping me from my children. I was going to go get my children. But hearing your story I’m going to let the courts handle everything. I don’t want to add more trauma to my children. But I fear they think I don’t want them. It’s been a month. They was supposed to return after summer but my ex is not releasing them to me. I just filled paperwork.
OMG Ryan, you have me in tears listening to your story because it is hitting home with what my husband has been going through as a father for the last 4 years of being alienated from his son. It is like you are describing the exact same details as if it a script these mothers are taught. My husband & I are listening together and want to thank you sooooooo much for telling your story. This is what I tell my husband all the time that one day his son's mother won't have control anymore and his son will seek him out and to never lose hope. I am so sorry you had to go through this and excited for you at the same time for your rekindled relationship with your father! God bless you!
Hi Tracy. I am the stepmom in the parental alienation story too. I've watched the mother drive a wedge between my husband and stepson for 9 years. Sometimes I want to do more to try to stop it. Other times I realize the more I get involved, the more aggressive the mother gets. She's always had to be in control. Our boy "decided on his own that he doesn't want to visit his father for the weekend anymore" when he was 15 and during the pandemic when he was home with his mother all the time. He just graduated high school and things are getting a little better now that he turned 18. he still lives with his mother and doesn't stay overnight with us ever since 15, but now we can go out and celebrate things like birthdays and Father's Day together.
@@kristenwishart453 so good to hear that things are getting better for your husband and you!! Love hearing the positive stories! Unfortunately, for us, my husbands son graduated high school 2 years ago and got further apart from his Dad. He changed his middle name (was his Dad's first name ) and his last name. That hit my husband hard. For some odd reason, he texts his Dad every so often to say how college is going & even wished him Happy Father's Day...which he used to forget to do before! Not sure if guilt may be setting in...who knows. My husband doesn't answer back.
Yes my heart goes out to all of you! I am still fighting for my son & daughter and dealing with “Parental Alienation” for almost two years now. God with us! ❤️🤘✝️
Thank you for the story it brought tears to my eyes,iam going through kinda the same thing except my son is on the autism spectrum its so difficult , thanks so much for this channel
These people should either be in jail for child abuse or tested for mental illness and then be restricted to supervised access. I am glad you were able to reunite with your dad.
On December 17, 2010 was the date I was ambushed. It was such a set-up and the first time that my ex told me that our daughter didn't like me. A statement so far fetched and un-real that I just looked over at our daughter and she slightly shook her head and looked down at the floor. My ex then jumped in and said, "well, those weren't her exact words..." and I knew that they weren't anything close. Our daughter and I had an incredible relationship. But that was then. The sad thing is that now my ex has succeeded (she has "won") and brainwashed our daughter to hate not only me but her step-mother and sisters. Our daughter is trapped, isolated, and being emotionally and psychologically abused. Joe Barrow, Alienated dad Founder www.April25.org and www.Parentalalienationvideos.com
Joe, I can't tell you how much I relate to your story. I'm so sorry this happened to you. TRAPPED is a excellent word to use. The controlling parent holds all the cards, making it very difficult for the child to speak up. In my case it wasn't until I started to get out in the "real world" and had other influences that light bulbs started turning on and realizing that things didn't add up as I had been brainwashed into believing. How old is your daughter now?
April2.5, don't lose hope as Ryan states. You are not alone and these children will become adults and finally have a say in their lives and not be "trapped" anymore and you will have your daughter back. My husband's case is all went to crap when the mother remarried and step daddy now became daddy so my husband had to be pushed out somehow. Now he calls my husband Mike and doesn't want to see him because he has a new daddy.
Tracy Foraker Still holding on to hope because we had such an amazing relationship. It was as perfect as you could imagine, she was my best friend. A part of her still loves me, but there is no way she can not show it.
I was ambushed 2 weeks ago... Lost my son to it. He doesn't want to be with me, and now his mother won't let me speak to him (and I have 50/50 custody). I have to unscrew this situation now. Thank you for sharing this. Powerful, and courageous.
Thank you soooooo much for making these videos. You tell of your experiences so clearly and understandably. It almost makes me sick to my stomach hearing them because I have been on the receiving end of this kind of abuse for so many years, but I am thrilled that the word is finally getting out and the public is being educated as to this insidious abuse, Way too many of us parents and grandparents have had to endure this for too many years. I've been the targeted parent and grand parent of parental alienation for 40 years. I'm glad my ex-husband was only able to alienate 1 of our three sons, but after he died, my oldest son then took over where his dad left off and tried to turn my other sons and grandchildren against me along with anyone else he can get to listen to him. My life has been so painful because of it. Parental alienation has attacked what is most precious to me, my family. And yet the perpetrators look so innocent and are so convincing in the lies they tell. I have a daughter-in-law who has told my son lies about me, as well, and I can no longer be alone with any of his children. What are the odds that I would have 3 people in my family who have all done the same thing to me? My ex-husband, my son and my daughter-in-law. Sometimes it's just too much. But, there is hope now that people are talking about the subject. Maybe the public's eyes will finally be opened and those of us who have suffered for so many years can get our families back together. I look forward to the day when one of my alienated grand children approaches me and says, "Grandma, I do not believe the lies I was told about you. I know you're not the kind of person they told me you were." I live for that day. Please keep making videos. Maybe one of these days one of my grandchildren will hear you and know they were lied to.
Thank you for sharing your story. I pray for your success. Eighteen years later... both my daughters and I have suffered anxiety/depression, self image distortions, & low-self esteem. Drug use and suicide attempts. My youngest daughter just died in May from a drug overdose and I read her journals... She felt horrible about herself and the more I pushed for the truth to be acknowledged, the more pain it was adding on her. The guilt... The shame... I was so busy fighting for my motherhood and it was causing them more harm. My other daughter resents me for trying to get the truth out. I do believe the guilt would eat her too, so I don't bring it up anymore. Our relationship is strained as she still blames me for how her life has turned out. All I can say to any parent feeling that alienation where they once had a good relationship with their children... find help immediately, even contact the school counselor. It doesn't take long for a line to be crossed that is very hard to come back from. It took years for me to put the pieces together because no one told me what he was going around saying and it never occured to me that he might do something like that. I've been broken for years and now that Joni is dead, my life is forever altered. I exist until my death, and I welcome that. With my luck, I'll outlive my other daughter and my ex.
My new wife found this on the weekend. Thanks for sharing this and what you're doing. I've been divorced for eight years, my ex wife and her family are 'the regime' who poison my daughter against me constantly, is constantly going against the court ordered separation agreement, constantly trying to remove my access, has lied to the courts and child services people trying to build a case against me in that I'm a bad, irresponsible parent. My 11 year old daughter is confused and while I know she loves me and her mum, she is rather withdrawn and often emotionless, even at the loss of a family pet I'm sure she loved. She also has made dragging me into court her new hobby in the way of bleeding me dry financially through the court system. Hell, I just spent $18,000 over 18 months in legal fees to clear up a lie she told to the courts which resulted in my daughter being taken away from me and a restraining order. I was successful in getting my access back but the authorities said I should get more vacation access per year and the evil one has now gone against the court order, scheduled her vacation time over my court ordered access time and I'm told I can't make up my court ordered access time... by her lawyer. Back to court we go. :( I'm curious Ryan... if you were 11 or 12 years old and in your situation... and your dad showed you your videos; would you see yourself in this situation or would you have been so brainwashed by the regime that you'd think that stuff happens to others, but not you. I'm struggling with trying to keep my daughter out of this as much as I can, but at what point do I start to work to open her eyes as to what's going on? She knows her mother hates me and she's told me her mother wants her to hate me as much as she does. But she loves me clearly, and is very fond of my new wife. Any advice?
Very similar story here, I'm a Frenchman in Spain, trying to cope with the regime, all Spaniards. For the very first visit, my 10 yo daughter had already been poisoned immensely without my being capable of doing anything. They set me a very vicious ambush, my ex wasn't even there, my daughter didn't want to come and was screeching, her aunt crying, and that had a woman call the police. I got a restraining order until there is a lawsuit, many months have gone by already and I can't contact in any way. I really wonder how badly my daughter is poisoned, and it's so sad because I have no way to try to show her the truth, that I love her more than anyone. I will do anything I can to save her from the abuse she's suffering.
You can't tell someone they're brainwashed. Their life is easier when you're not in it due to the evil ex. I am going through this too and due to coercion by the alienating parent their reality is not the same as yours. They know when you're in their life it brings anguish. We can only hope that as they grow they'll see their parent for what they really are and realize you are the one who loves them.
Thank you Ryan for speaking out about this. These experiences must have been heart wrenching to endure. Eventhough my ex was a bit more covert about the alienation my daughter was brainwashed non the less. Now it has been 4 years with no contact, no invite to her wedding and probably no contact with any future grandchildren. Keep speaking up, maybe one day my estranged daughter will see this and a light bulb will go off. I have brought up PAS to her but she denies and says her father didn't brainwash her, I beg to differ. We divorced when she was just a baby so she has had a lifetime of conditioning that I am less than and that is how she treats me. I will be watching all of your new and exciting ventures you have in store.
Ryan your talk about Dad being Ambushed hit home with me. My Ambush was worse as they did an Ex-partee order against the father, Dad. That is were everyone was in the Courtroom except Dad, all the Court orders were signed against Dad. Dad could not see any one of his children for 7 years as Court orders. Years later to much water went under the bridge with no contact for 15 years. The Grapevine says they all have mental issues and Depressed all the time. Cannot get a job or keep one and still living with the Controlling parent in their 30's. My oldest son just made contact after 15 years and he is mad violent, angry, upset, depressed, swearing and I had to ask him what his problem was as Dad thought about walking away from all his issues. Every time he had a question for me the son was so far out of the truth. When I started to fill him in he thought I was lying and told him I'll show the papers to him. The son said it was funny how all 5 of them had Dad removed with no home or place to live as he and his friends had a good laugh at Dad's expense. My son shows no empathy, feelings and if all of the other children are like that son. What parent wants more drama in their lives years later. I cried for years over my children as though they are all died.
I as an alienated mother of 13 years applaud you, your story is so truthful, honest and heartfelt. I look forward to hearing more of your truth and about the father son relationship you have now. I had sadness when watching, as I could so relate you Ryan to my daughter Kiley who just turned 25, I have a very strong feeling if you and she were to ever meet you would be a powerhouse duo for parental alienation awareness. I by the end of your video, had changed from sadness to hope, which I haven't had much of as of late. I heard the power and amazing strength you have as a young man who went through this horrible situation. I have to say, hearing you talk about the future you have ahead of you with your dad made my heart sing
Wow, thank you for this message. Thank you for sharing your story as a mom, it also highlights the fact that parental alienation goes both ways. Either parent can alienate. Selfishness, control, and egocentrism is so toxic. How is your relationship with Kiley at this point? I can't wait to share more updates now that people like you want to hear more!
I'm going through the greatest pain of my life. My daughters mom has been trying to destroy my relationship with my daughter. It's videos like this that help leverage strength and understanding. Thank you 👍❤️🙏
I worry about my kids being screwed up from all the crazy nonsense they are going through. But you give me hope that they can survive all the redderick and become healthy well adjusted people.
I am a mother and have been alienated from my three precious children for almost 4 years. I never could imagine this happening. I just discovered your videos through a narcissist support group. Thank you for bringing hope of one day being reunited with my children. I have felt hopeless.
You've given me hope. Thank You so much. I'm a father going through this with 4 now adult children. It's been heart breaking countless night's of crying like a baby. But after watching this and countless others I'm finally starting to understand WHY now I know and have always believed that I just didn't know what to call it until I stumbled across some vids like your's you can't imagine the sense of relief I feel knowing other people are going through this. Again Thank You !
I'm going through this right now. My middle child has been turned but my other two are remaining loyal. Loyalty has its price as they are yelled at and told how ashamed their mother is. My daughter has planned running away. I thought I had got through to my son but she abused him, locked him in his room, didn't let him pat the dog and threw his iPad in the bin. Next he was with me he was acting up again and elbowed me in the face. I smacked him for it. He was taken to the police. I spent 5 full days in court mostly waiting. Never said a word or saw the evidence against me. I was pressured to take an undertaking without admissions (no plea, no trial) because ultimately this needs to play out in a proper family court. Regardless, I got given a 22 week men's violence program that I must undertake or face jail. I've looked it up. It is a Duluth Model program which means it's all about male privilege, power and entitlement in a patriarchal society where men are oppressors and women victims.
Thank You, Ryan!!! You are a very wise, brave person. I have hope that my daughter will think like you and eventually realize that I'm not who she was trained to think I am.
Thank You Ryan for giving we rejected parents a "Front Row Seat" as an example as to what we rejects endure. Bless you for being intuitive and emotionally capable to see beyond the staged scenario of the intended purpose to unfairly paint your dad as the "bad parent". My son had the front row when my ex pushed me against his house and I fell on the driveway. He then called 911 to "protect his children from my abuse". My son eventually was admitted to a Psych ward on suicide watch twice for being told what he saw did not happen. The police believed his cunning father and I was ordered off the property. Thank You Again.
I am an Alienated Mum, current,y reuniting with my 15 yr old son. My role as Parent is gone but we are building a new relationship... Thank you vey much for what you are doing to help stop this.
Thanks for sharing your story. My daughter is 5 years old. Her mother takes great pride in hurting my relationship with my daughter. For 2 years I have been trying to get my child back home. Her mother moved her 2700 miles away and could care less about my child's development. She only cares about how she can manipulate people into viewing her as a model person. Those that have been around her long enough start to see the mask drop.People contact me stating that they will testify to help me get my daughter because the mother sleeps around and does what a narcissist does. The problem is the way the courts handle this situation for fathers is extremely one sided and unfair. It is easily provable what she has done but the courts could care less about fairness. They assume she is sane because she is allowed to call in and they can't see the manipulation in person. I hope you are ok now and thanks again for sharing your story.
I'm loosing my little baby girl to this right now. As a 22 year old dad i don't know how to handle it. It all caving in so fast and i cant seem to get my facts together faster than they can make the DCF report and throw away my rights. I'm terrified and i thought i was alone... until now thank you :,( Much love from CT. A fatherless state.
I lost two sons and a daughter due to the same thing, but just to see that you saw what happened and recognized what your dad went through, makes me so happy, as if it was me that was in your dads shoes, thank you so much for what you are doing. I have a son 34 years old, a son 19, and a daughter 18, and they think I'm the dirt of the earth, and I made it a point to never speak bad about their mother. again, thank you, August
What an incredibly powerful story. You are so articulate, your thoughts and feelings so well spoken that I had goosebumps watching this. I particularly liked how you explained how you felt as a child witnessing the drama and seeing/hearing your mother and her relatives tell lies. It's so important to remember that in the end, there is a CHILD who has to deal with all this and try to make sense of it. My fiance has an 8-year-old son who is not alienated yet, but not for the lack of trying on his mother's part. She would fall in the "mild to moderate" alienator category at this time, but she is a narcissist/sociopath so there's no telling what will happen in the future. Ages 8 to 13 are supposedly the prime years for alienation. Meanwhile, my fiance is trying to maintain a good relationship with his son with the minimal time that he has (every other weekend and Wednesday nights). Well done and bravo, Ryan. Thank you for speaking out! --Lynne R.
Alienators LOVE to create a big scene, especially in front of the kids. I cannot tell you how many times this very scenario happened to me during exchanges. My husband filmed them and we started needing police to do a civil stand by. When cops were there he’d be on his BEST behavior, and flip the script.
Thomas. You are giving me the first and only small glimmer of hope that I've found in over 10 years of trauma from watching, helplessly as this abuse is destroying my 2 children. It is about to be made permanent in 2 weeks with the official removal of my "unenforceable" 50% custody that she has refused for years without consequence. Our judge has been extremely and openly bias in support of their mom from the very beginning of our divorce, despite her being openly unfaithful to our marriage. She even demanded, and was granted the right to remarry her new lover immediately after divorce, instead of the 1 year separation required by law! It's a small town and she has family friends in the police and court house... So I've no path back to my children that I can see. I can only hope and pray they will see in time what has happened and make a path back to me as adults, as you did. It seems to be rare in these cases though... Could you please describe how exactly you came to discover the truth and what, if anything, your father might have done to help bring it to your attention in a way that you could have seen at 13-17 years old? Thanks so much for your work in this subject!!
thanks RT for using the correct term 'ambush'. Thats the way i described my alienation when i went to pick up my twin 8 year old daughters (8 months ago, now their 9) from their mother my ex. people dont understand it was pre-meditated. I am so sorry you went thru this as a child. Thank you for talking about it.
Wow, thank you so much for telling your story! My son’s ex and boyfriend rented a house. When it was my son’s time for visitation, she texted him that they had now moved to her new ‘permanent’ address to live with her mother. Well that didn’t make sense. But a lot didn’t make sense that she did. Her boyfriend told my son he could pick his son up at his ex’s mother’s house. I went with him. It was a 425 mile drive to get there. My son took two steps into the yard and her boyfriend bellows out, ‘You’re Trespassing’! My son stopped, not really understanding what was going on. Her boyfriend paced back and forth on the front porch with his phone, apparently trying to get a signal. His face was very red. He looked furious and we had no idea why. That was 1.5 years ago. I don’t know what my grandson saw or thinks. He was almost 4. After about 5 mins of watching him pace in and out, we left to go to the police station, but flagged down an officer on the way there. He and his partner said they were sorry, but it was a civil matter and they couldn’t do anything, for the 3rd time. Apparently, the boyfriend was furious because the police were for some reason supposed to already be there to arrest my son for something that was supposed to happen? I don’t know. But I now believe his ex said they lived there so they would have witnesses to whatever was supposed to occur, but thankfully didn’t. I did hear the policeman talking to the county attorney on the phone who said, ‘I did see a paper yesterday, but I didn’t see it anywhere today’. My son was up to date on child support, so it wasn’t that. It took me quite a while to realize it was all a setup. My son figured out quickly he had been set up, but he had never said that to me until recently. The small town there, the lawyer, judge, and boyfriend were all friends. It was hopeless to get any justice. My son is going at this a different way now, and we are praying and hoping he will prevail in a different court. She has moved 9x in 4 years, now over 1,000 miles away, from Texas to Michigan without anyone’s permission? Kidnapping, to erase my son, who faithfully always picked up his son? I don’t know. But I appreciate your story so much, because I have been wondering how people could be so cruel as to set up a person who had done nothing wrong. We will see our little guy one day very soon, I believe. These people are too cruel and deceitful to be raising a child, in my opinion. Thank you again!
Thank you. I feel vindicated, and hopeful. 5yrs 9mo NO CONTACT with my two beautiful daughters. We reunited a week ago. We are both scared to death. This is so sad. No child deserves this. No human deserves this. ☹️
The message at the end, your mission, thank God for you Ryan. I know this old but I am a 56 YO targeted parent and everything you talked about happening with your dad is happening to me now and yes it is about control. She even has the regime. I could tell you so much about my sons's mother is controlling, narcissistic, manipulative, possibly borderline personality disorder. I have been dealing with severe results and tactics of alienation for 6 years and have been researching PA all this time trying to get someone to listen to what is going on and it's as if no one even knows about it. She has now filed a PFA order that is based on lies and she filed it because my son said he wanted to live with us. Me and his little sister and his stepmom miss him so much and I am having a hard time now communicating with him bc he is suffering PAS. He's been totally brainwashed at this point now and the whole family has taken part in that as will as professionals who have been mislead and disregard any sign that there is PA going on. If anyone who is familiar with PA got involved and evaluated what is happening to me now they would see it so clearly and could perhaps testify before the court as an expert and shed light on it so the Judge could look for signs in my son when he brings him into court in March of 21. It is so awful a feeling to be held just short of seeing him face to face to try and repair the damage right now when it is important and could be done so he could recover at age 15, but moreover to be a 56 YO father who has been stripped of all ability to parent and do something as a recognized parental authority to help facilitate that end and help my son, oh I just can;t tell how powerless and helpless and defeated I feel right now. The depression and the trauma of that PFA order and the court dragging things out with continuances that have now extended it to 18 mos without ever addressing he allegations she made, that I can defend against with hard evidence to prove she lied btw, is wearing on me so bad right now that I am tired and weak and not able to sleep right. I'm not able to function and be as present for my 12 YO daughter as I used to be right now. I'm dozing off in the middle of the day and not getting REM sleep till much later in the evening. My mind is consumed with this ordeal and has been ever since she had me served in a parking lot with my wife and daughter there as we handed him off back to her and her mother at a dance school that day. She literally set me up to be served there. My son was only trying to establish some independence as a 13 yo boy who wanted to do something different and he was sick of the drama with his mother that continued to be such a struggle for him. I could have filed and abuse order against her before she did it tome and I would have been justified but that wasn't something I thought about or even wanted to start up because I always felt we should be able to resolve things as a family, but boy how I underestimated her and now I feel so ashamed for not being more aggressive as his dad. My case is so clear, I don;t see how anyone wouldn't see it, I don't see how the court can;t be aware of PA and how it is being done to me and his little sister now. All I wanted was to share parenting in his life and for he and his sister to know and love each other. His mother is a classic alienator. I just wish I had someone who knew and could listen to my story so maybe I could get some confirmation, not just for me but also in helping me to know how I might address it all and be able to repair this damage to my boy before it leaves him scarred as a young adult. I;m not interested in revenge, though I do want the family court judge to end it with some reprimand and perhaps making me whole again, but mostly I really just want to help my son, Just want to help him and fix things for his and his sister's relationship.
Thank you...my son has lost his 2 daughters to a wicked mom. He has not seen his daughters for one year...and he is an amazing dad and person...I cry with him. Please keep up the good work.
My son is now 17+, it's been 2+ year's since I've seen him - I'm 54. This takes years to reconcile, and the chances that I'll see him again is near impossible. All the best , God Bless but reconciliation is year's most of us don't have.
Hello Ryan, thank you for being real and being transparent. I have been separated and heading for divorce. I have witnessed and continue to encounter these evil atracks. My kids are 16 and 14 years old. This wicked behavior brings confusion to a child. Ryan, when I decided to follow Christ, is when the attacks and lies increased even more. I am still holding on to my faith, and while doing so, I will continue to do my best to show them unconditional love. I would like to join you on this journey to fight against parent alienation anyway I can. For any parent who is struggling with this wicked behavior, I want to encourage you, to anchor yourself in Christ He has given me strength in the most difficult times. I am learning not to focus on the negativity in what I hear or see, but to believe and focus on the finish product, which is healing and restoration for the alienated children. If anyone wants to contact me for any reason even for prayer please do so.
Wow!! when I hear this it brings back so many memories, of which I'm not even sure my kids remember. They were 8 and 10. I had a court order to go pick them up for Easter. A few days before the kids were forced to call me and tell me not to come, they had other plans. Daddy had planned a trip to the farm and invited friends so they didn't want to go with me. Well, I showed up anyway and in my case, the Father and Step-mother ordered the kids out in the street to scream at me, why did I come, we don't want to go with you, etc.etc. Mind you, my children happen to be in Argentina (international case) and I had to travel 14,000 miles to see them. I called the police, they came and told me I could "force" the children to go with me. My kids were crying and so traumatized I decided to walk away and not "force" them to go with me. I told them mommy would be waiting if they decided they wanted to see me. This is ONLY ONE of MANY for 12 years. The pain I feel for my kids that they have had to go through this is almost more than I can bare at times. Ryan, your videos will help SO MANY children realize first, what they've been put through and second they are NOT ALONE. Thank YOU...
Ryan, I'm so grateful for your openness, it gives me hope. My former husband, parents are siblings have told huge convincing lies about me, so much so that I haven't seen my grown kids and grandkids that I babysat for 10 years, in 5 years. I was inspired to go and I was sitting quietly at my Father's funeral. My sister created such a commotion called the police to have them physically remove me.
Sharing this video is so incredibly important Ryan. It has helped me when I am at a real low point with my alienated daughter and my battle to see her.
I feel so bad that you had to go through this. And the fact that my daughter has had to live through this for 14y makes me sick. And the fact that the judges and lawyers in family court make things worst for the child and the targeted parent leaves me without words. I haven’t seen or heard from my daughter in over 5y.
Should I start making videos about my story? You are a total inspiration for me and i don't know why but you remind me of my son Sheamus and I hope that one day he and my other 3 children speak out about everything with as much passion as you do. I am so sick of everything. My mother and I both know it never changes, it is beating a dead horse, it never gets better. The alienating parties and the court system care nothing for these kids. Much like it was for you in your story, it is always either the battle royale, or it is complete and total alienation, and by that I mean months and years and total silence. I have paid close to 15 to 20 thousand dollars in debts to lawyer fees et cetera fighting to see my kids and regain control and custody and nothing ever ever changes. Ever.
God be with us all going through this terribly painful injustice. Injustice to the child and injustice to the targeted parent. Vengeance is mine says the lord.
OMG The strict pick up time happened to me so many times. She even took him as a toddler and hid him at her mothers when I was 5 minutes late due to traffic once.
I can barely type so bern with me. This is happening to my right now. My ex wife is a borderline/narcissist and she has turn my kids against me. First my daughter at 6 months after the separated and now my son 14 months after separating. I’ve studied this front and back . I started a long time ago because I was going insane from her emotional abuse and I just started googling issues. I’m so terrified right now . I can’t see my kids. She’s blocked me in their phones and I can’t do anything about it right now because of Coronavirus. But I can see it. I’m right at the edge of losing the next 10 or 20 30 years. I can’t take it She’s gets away with everything . Her mom and dad team up just like u said and they all go after me and warp my kids minds and I got no on help. I need help desperately. They are the real deal Everything you read or hear about. There is no boundaries with them. They will just flat out lie about anything. I just need someone who knows this and can prove it to a judge. Most people don’t know. They believe it all. They don’t know or see the splitting in my children. The lack of empathy. The sense of entitlement. The way they speak is not recognizable for kids their age. They couldn’t possibly have the perspective at 13 ,14 years old. Even their text messages, cover the name and it’s identical to the stuff she says. Yet they always get away with it. She’s 40 , we got 3 kids, one is autistic, and she leaves at midnight and comes home at 7 am completely drunk and lucky to even be alive , when my kids are waking up and have no one to take care of them especially the youngest. He’s just 10 and has a lot of struggles Yet her parents , cousin who facilitates the partying , even my kids now all defend it. Or actually even ignore it. No one ever says ‘ hey you left your kids alone all night to get plastered and do god knows what and render yourself incapable of caring even for yourself’. And the topic and argument? I was there at 7 am because I knew from a friend who drove by on his way to work that her car was gone. So I’m a stalker. That’s all that’s discussed . And it’s like that with everything and it’ always flies. No one ever steps in and says anything but me. So I’m Crazy. I just need help. I’ve even tried mailing Dr Craig Childress. For no better reason than this is such a clear cut case of alienating by a pathological parent and her supporters, all in its absolute most evil and covert way. It probably would be good to study honestly. I’m pretty sure I have ptsd from all this crap and it’s all I can do to just not break down in tears every 5 minutes. I just want someone to help. Some one that understands It’s so crazy people just think I’m making it up. Those who’ve dealt with this know i way I mean. I’m in Texas outside of Dallas. I will find a way to pay. Please . I’m on RUclips begging for help to a world of strangers. These are my kids. They are good kids. Absolutely wonderful hearts and she’s destroying them. They already have scars that will never heal. She’s gonna turn them into just like her family. I feel like I can’t save them. I hAve so much proof but it’s like no one even cares. I’m just , I don’t even know how to describe it. I need a miracle from god to save my children
three years later after fighting International Parental Child Abduction and Parental Alienation, i finally have access to m,y son, and am using this video and your other content on your website to try to get through to the mother and educate her, and myself to work together to avoid this. The mother still needs to renounce her need to include the child in her resentment, but i think if i can get her to watch your content more, then we can safely say, that your content is serving its purpose. Bless you Ryan, i was a child of parental alienation and international divorce between two countries, as is my son.. and your content is an essential part of my repair project. With me, it starts with giving from my side, and waiting for the generosity to work its magic on the other parent.. but till now, nothing is being given back. I just asked her to watch this video of yours, but said she should absorb al your content, because this video shows anger at the mother's misdeeds, but later, whenj we watch all your videos, and read your website, we can see you progress to work towards an unbiased non hateful addressing of the issue, a deconstruction of it, and work for all parties, both the parent left behind, and the alienating parent, to develop a fair and compassionate solution, that leads all involved back towards a happy life, and healthy loving relationship with both parents
Dealt with similar ambushes from my ex husband and his new wife. Was traumatic for me and my children. He has recently managed to alienate me from my youngest and this gives me hope we will reunite. My oldest sees the truth and had cut his father out 2 years ago at age 15 but he tells anyone who will listen that I’m the reason his son won’t have contact. It breaks my heart daily and breaks my heart that my son had to make that choice. The family court system is so uneducated on psychological abuse.
Thank you, Ryan. What a sad story, and what an awesome outcome for you and your dad. I pray for something similar for myself and my children. The alienation poison is like a blowtorch to my soul.
I have been alienated from my daughter for more than 16 years. Before the alienation happened, I learned a number of tricks used by my ex and her new husband to destroy my once great relationship with my daughter. Among them were things like connecting a fax machine to the phone line, when I was supposed to call her, throwing away a scooter I brought her, because it was "dangerous", giving me wrong times of important events that my daughter participated in, bashing me in front of her or letting her "overhear" bad opinions about me, not letting me bring her a bread she liked, which was not available, where she lived, cancelling my visits, because I "did not call" (my calls were not answered...) and many more... At the time, I think, I did not really know the actual purpose of those actions or wrongly believed that the relationship between my daughter and me was so strong that it could not be destroyed. As for most alienated parents, the rejection came suddenly and without a warning, underscoring my naïve beliefs. The extent of the campaign against me conducted by my ex and her new husband is best illustrated by an event that happened a while after my parental role was limited exclusively to paying child support. My daughter suddenly called me. She was crying and asked me why I wanted to destroy her life... I think, the majority of parents commenting on this video have similar experiences. I also believe that people watching videos on parental alienation are rejected and alienated parents. All of us know how the alienation hurts and most of us, if not all, know how it destroys children. Most of us tried different ways to reverse the alienation and failed, even though many of our attempts were already based on an extensive knowledge of the phenomenon. I think it is extremely important, when the child victims of parental alienation speak up. Their voice, if heard by others who went through a similar ordeal, may help them realize what they have been deprived of, reach out to their alienated parents and heal.
Thanks for this videos. I had a situation that was similar. I was the parent being Alienated. They did so many tactics but they played games and forced my daughter to call her step parent mom. Because her other children were confused. To this day my daughter still calls her mom. I found this out from my young child's mouth. This is just one thing they did. It breaks my heart my daughter is 25 and completely brainwashed and I tried to wake her up a bit. It didn't work. But I hope the things I said she thinks about. They have had her since she was 9 but they were doing tactics as early as maybe 2. So I hope your videos can help parents and the children to wake up. All they need is just a little seed of doubt. All of this narcissism is running through my family and my daughter's family. I'm the only woke individual in both families. I hope that my daughter being so smart and the scapegoat that she wakes up soon. I figured everything out last year at age 48. If I had known what was going on fully I would have Fought harder. But I wasn't strong enough and had zero help. I left her dad when she was like 11/2. I should have ran far away then. I made the mistakes in trusting her father. Its a long story. I'm writing everything done so if I pass my roommate can give my daughter all the information. I just hate she is still under their control. She is in her 2nd toxic narcissistic relationship. And I believe she is seeing it. But is stuck. I have pretty much been blocked from her life with no contact for a year in August so next month will be a year. Hardest year ever. But I have learned a lot in this year to better help myself and to help her. I have reached out with no response. The last time I saw her the time was sabotaged by them and her boyfriend. All I asked was to have her spend a night at a concert with me just me and her. They made her believe that I was unfair to not let them have her for part of the concert. And well I let her do what she wanted. And she brought her boyfriend over to where we were. And well I never got time with her really alone. I tried to hold back tears at the Evanescence concert. The songs hit very close to home. And her utter disrespect was hard to deal with. But I didn't reach. But I did the hard things. I sent her books I hope she read. One was Inherited trauma and the other was about parental alienation. I was probably a big joke. But I don't care if she doesn't want to talk to me because of it. The seed needed planted at 25. She has to wake up. I hope she is because I'm so tired of being away from my daughter. The Alienation caused me to gain a 150 pounds and I lost about 80 of it and I've gained it back. So now I'm working on me just me. So she can have a healthy happy mom to come back to hopefully. But the sadness never goes away. The shame never goes away that I let them do this to her. I just appreciate so much your courage making these videos. So proud of you and the awareness you are spreading. I really have wanted to make videos for people too. I'm not there yet but I do plan to do this too. But from the moms view of what happened. I'm just waiting for my child to wake up. Thanks for your kindness and help with all your videos. I'm so sorry you had to go through this as a child an a udult. No one should have to feel the way you did.
I won't even begin. People have no idea how the court system, the police, the lawyers and the hate manifests. Descriptions would seem unreal. The nightmares, the subsequent ptsd, the realization of what humanity is, is debilitating, depressing, and the will to even live in this world is hard to come by after experiencing the loss of my children, 9 years ago. Sick.
I think what you are doing with these videos is amazing. I have witnessed and been a victim of this in many ways at many different times in my life and the pain that this creates for the child, for a lifetime, is nothing to taken lightly. People need to be made aware of the devastation that this creates in the childs life and future and present relationships. Thank you for being conscientious enough to see the reality of all sides of the story and brave enough to put it out there.
God bless you for sharing your story. My Narcissistic ex and her Narcissistic family are actively brainwashing my innocent children. I'm trying to save them from the same pain you have endured. I'm glad you have the wisdom to break through the manipulation.
Jesus, I'm dealing with this right now with my 16yo daughter. It's killing me, because I see it happening more and more and I'm stuck for how to deal with it. When she's at home; I do the best that I can to keep things as normal as possible. But in my heart, I feel like I'm dying inside almost to the point of hopelessness. I am so sorry for all of the parents who've been place in this position. I used to be the praying kind; but when god didn't intervene I lost faith. Just know that I'm thinking of all of you and hoping that things work out for the best sooner, than later. Hugs from Colorado.
ColoradoLady72 God is all over this.God will bring it together x have hope,stay sane first,then keep your own life going because when they come back into your life,you have grown and will be an incredible role model to your child,even if they are ‘grown’ ,be strong momma.dont talk or criticise the other parent.be positive around that child,on the phone or in letters.keep the line of communication open.always xxxx make it clear you have no anger or resentment.just be loving.and positive.however hard!!!! Write beautiful loving letters.keep them updated about your life.make it seem happy and nice.xxx it might take time,but one day they will respond xxx and walk right back into your life xxx I am the same,but I keep going because I will be a grandparent one day,and those grand babies will need me!!!! They aren’t taking that from me!!! And Hun....the more you fight the alienator(s),the MORE they LIKE it.cut contact with them and just txt your daughter everyday,or once a week,no recriminations,no hurt,no anger.just be there.even if no response.if it gets too much have a break but then go back to messaging whenever you want,or feel the urge,xxxx always txt or send cards or letters for Christmas and birthdays xxx don’t give any ammo to the alienators in being ‘angry’ or the ‘bad’ parent.just do what you know to be right without feeding into their games.stay pleasant,stay detatched xxx look into coda or alanon.it helps to get support in dealing with spiritually sick people.
I just discovered you! I’m so sorry you had to go through this. My son has been alienated from me since 2019. He’s almost 18 now. Thank you for being so honest and open about what you went through.
Dear Ryan, this is the far best description of what is happening to my kids and me since almost seven years. I can't change it ... went to court, did everything right ... everything bad was thrown against me without any evidence. I see my kids in you, they are 15/13/11 ... I hope they are strong enough to survive the killing of half of their identity ... please keep posting videos ! All my love to you !
Thank you. shine that flashlight bright. I have 3 kids and divorced a NARC 6 yrs ago. I got sole custody but was always flexible with time and as a result he stomped on it but if kids wanted to i continued to. well now, my youngest was encouraged to run away thinking it was his idea because life with me was hell and his father hsa twisted every thing to make me look like bad parent and my son does not want to see me. i have thought of giving up as he does not seem to care but i know he does deep down. we had an awesome relationship. when he went to dads told him to have fun and when with me focused on building our relationship. i know i have to show up and not give up. i love my son too much to let our relationship be destroyed
I wish I could upvote this video a million times. This sounds EXACTLY like I am going through with my extremely narcissistic ex wife and our only kid who is now an adult and hasn’t spoken to me in over five years.
THANK YOU RYAN! You are saving my relationship between my daughters and I. I will not give up on us and I am stronger now after watching this episode. So Thank YOU! I'm grateful for RUclips to gather similar channels and help me find more support. You are my earth angel, and I'm so sorry that you had to experienced that at 8. You've given me so much hope
While not nearly as dramatic, I am going through something very very similar with my 3 kids. I am the one that had the affair, but for nearly 5 years, I have been vilified by my ex and her "regime", with numerous posts about me on facebook by my ex, in addition to constantly evading contact via phone, letters, e-mail, skype, etc... I am fought at every turn to arrange visits. Literally dozens of reports with CPS after months of no contact, not being informed about major medical emergencies, not being informed when they moved out of state for months at a time, ... I ache for my children, and am preparing myself to help them deal with their resentment that they will undoubtedly hold against their mother and her family. I salute you, friend. Keep up the fight.
Thank you for speaking out from the child's perspective. My husband is in your dad's position and his son had told him he no longer wants to see him. I explained to my husband that that is exactly how a child would feel, they just want it to stop. My husband hurts everyday and this video has helped him more than you will ever know! How is your relationship with mom now? God Bless you!
My husband and I feel your pain Beth. I prayer daily for these parents who are kept from the other parent. It saddens and sickens me that it's even allowed to continue.
Very similar to what happened to me! My wife, her family and friends did all they could to totally destroy me and my reputation. This is a very insightful video . . .
I’m your Dad in this situation. And I’m crying. I love my son so dang much and she’s hurting me so much in this divorce. My son was so mad at me at the exchange today (he is 3). He had the most angry face and said, “Daddy, why did you sell the house!” He doesn’t even understand the concept of the word sell! You should have seen how angry his face was. The truth is I loved our house, my spouse, and especially my son… our family. She was physically abusing him, threatened suicide, and threatened my life. Then filed for divorce. It’s been devastating to me and my son. Now, she’s saying to him things like, “show me your muscles!” When I’m in a wheelchair. I’ve spent $50,000 in court trying to keep my son safe. I would go into debt (which is one of my big no no-s in life for myself) to keep my son safe. He’ll never get to see this portion of my love for him. We were both the victims of her and now she’s turning him against me. “Daddy took the TV away” “Daddy sold the house.” “Daddy is the bad guy.” I can’t tell you the helplessness I feel. I’m not even trying to get you guys on my side. It’s just this emptiness I feel the minute my son leaves me. I love him so much. Your Dad loves you. I don’t know how to combat this and I may not live long enough for him to get married where your friend says “you look just like your dad.” I’ve got disabilities and so he might hate to look like me by the time he’s your age. I don’t know what to do. He is my everything. I may not live long enough to show him how much I love him. Sorry to unload on you, I don’t feel good at the moment and feel empty and am not trying to make you feel sorry for me. I just want you to know your dad loves you. I may not be able to explain it to my son so maybe I can help your Dad with your relationship. I just want the best for you. The best for my son.
My Son was twenty when I lost him, it took my ex less than a month to 'brainwash' him, I knew she was doing it at the time because like with your dad, my ex blatantly projected her deeds onto me. Recently I tried my own hand at deliberate 'manipulation'. It was all too easy to bear bait him on FB, but the result is that I 'manipulated him into organising a counselor of his choosing to "resolve the dispute" (the one I deliberately created and refused to apologize for), my only condition was that he choose a degree qualified psychologist. The first few sessions have dashed my hopes for a quick recovery, his emotional walls are more like a fortress. The word "identify" hits the nail on the head, if the discussion starts heading that direction he becomes agitated and aggressive, other than that he behaves normally. One good sign is that he is having extreme difficulty expressing what it is that upsets him Thanks for making the videos (takes a lot of balls to do something like that), they have given me some good tips, the light bulb metaphor is a good one, I've warned my son to try to avoid treating his mum like he has treated me if/when "the penny drops" I know nothing about your mum but I do know my ex has hated half of herself for all her life, and the half she hated really was a violent insectious alcoholic who "reigned"over his family like a cult leader. Not long after he died she went off the rails for 5yrs on a mix of alcohol and zoloft, but we get along ok now, she has genuinely tried to help for the past 5yrs but her baggage gets in the way, she turns into her father when threatened, she frequently feels threatened by non-obvious triggers, to the extent that she sometimes passes out from the panic attack. Having said that, she has been fully aware of her disorder for almost 20yrs now, for the entire time she has a clear choice in front of her, she can stop hiding her illness and feeding it red wine, anytime she chooses.
I'm a Father that was done just like your Dad was done. My children now are your age and now my children/ sons will be living in my new house. They have told me this same story all most word for word as you have. so it was worth all that I went through/hell at each visitation. But I never missed seeing them
I just listened to more and found you you were 25 years old. I am so sorry you have gone through this. We are still in the middle of it all. She is 15 and its been 4 1/2 years away from us. Her situation is just as horrible and she is believing it.
Dude there's no other person who could explain this than someone who has been through it. You have no idea what your testimony is doing for fathers who are going through this. It's amazing how you are able to recall this and you understand exactly what has happened to you , you saw everything for yourself. I tell my child's mother this all the time, I tell her, don't worry the kids will see you for who you are.
Would love to see some videos from your dad hearing how he was able to cope with everything he went through and stay connected with you despite all of the interference. This is where I’m at and I’m going on five years
Thanks for speaking out about parental alienation. This most definitely could fit more than parental alienation this also fits the domestic violence against men and how nothing is being done. Men do face domestic violence more than women but it is considered harmless against them because they are stronger. Parental alienation is very destructive and I've seen my niece go through behind the sidelines i helped should light of her dad. Parental alienation Needs to stop. Thank you again for finding the motivation to share and make a difference.
I cannot thank you enough. To have the perspective of a concerned child has so much potential to change people's minds - as alienating parents always hide behind the so called "well-being" of the child. I get routinely rejected by my 14 and 17 year old kids when I want to go in for something with them. Their mother always blames puberty (adolescence) for that, but we have a long story of alienation already behind us. So although I am not insisting on undertaking something with them when they themselves claim to "have no time" - I am still quite unsure about this and wheather I should insist anyways. On top of that I know that their mother is trying to tell them I would be kind of "addictive" to them as my kids and me myself would not be too self-dependend. Again: How can you do it right, without looking indifferent at the same time.I really cannot tell wheather they want to really see me or just think they have to pretend. Sorry for the long text... Thank you sooo much for your perspektive. Wish there would be similar sites in german !!! Keep it up, eventually you are very important for lots of people ! Michael, Ingolstadt, Germany
A very powerful video; thank you very much for sharing your story. Very courageous. I am a targeted parent who has lost contact with my daughter so I know your dad's feelings. I am so glad you have reconnected, a true blessing.
This is me and my sons and my husband and his son having it on both sides is so difficult, I only hope that we can continue to have a loving relationship with them, I’m so sorry for your experience it just breaks my heart, staying calm is the only choose we have as the victim parents but at least we know what we are dealing with, can I add thank god for video recording all drop off and pick ups, I feel that it helps protect these children at least to keep a record
You are amazing. Thanks so much for sharing and being so honestly RAW with your feelings and the truth behind this terrible issue. A very very dear friend of my is suffering from this and I am so happy she has someone like you to truly put a Human Presence and help to guide her as she incessendly tries to regain a relationship with her Children.. I know this must be somewhat painful for you but it is so appreciated by so many.. THANK YOU!!! Good luck to everyone dealing with these issues.!
Great video mate !! My wife left for another man over 15 months ago. I got on with my life and focussed on the kids seeing them 12 nights per month for the last 12 months !! 9 weeks ago the weekend I was due to pick my kids up for Father's Day the mother called the cops and made insane allegations and I haven't so much as spoken to my babies for 9 weeks !! I have been struggling to cope and I'm terrified that my kids won't be as strong willed as you and will forget me. My sons birthday has come and gone and they wouldn't even let me speak to him !!! Sick. My little girl is 7 and my son is sick. I love them so much and the mother knows this is killing me !!! I can never understand why she is doing this when she left me !!! Thanks again for giving me hope that the kids will see the truth in the end !! Paul.
Thank you for speaking up! Your video is so very sorely needed. I am an alienated father. I pray that someday, somehow, my own children stumble upon your video, and their eyes may be opened.
I haven't seen my son since he was 8, he hates me as his mother successfully removed me from his life. No hope for me now as a dad, but hope his life turns out ok.
I lost my daughter not seeing her 14 years. I was psychologically abused by my ex until I collapsed mentally. It almost led me to suicide.Lost everything....even went homeless.
I took me years to recover...but I still have mental scars from this.
Using a child as a weapon to destroy a parent is the worst.
Child alienation needs to be punished by 7 years hard labor.
its been 10 years of this for me now as a father, i had given up hope of my daughter ever knowing me until i saw this, thank you, i have hope again.
hope for me too. I hope to help others with Ryans mission.
+BinoDist terrible isn't it. how can a someone live with causing such sadness to another person. its a wound that never heals. I was recently given some photos of my daughter, she is now a young woman. I have missed her entire childhood,
Hope is a double edged sword.
Im so sorry. I understand this too.
Well I do not !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This was painful to watch. I was ambushed regularly for 16 years. And, I never knew when the police would be waiting for me on some new false allegation of violence, stalking, threats, sex abuse of my own child, etc......
Thank you for this video Ryan. My wife did the same thing to me. Family Court is the most corrupt organization I have come across.
"Family Court is the most corrupt organization I have come across." Chapeau!!
YUP! the whole so called family court system is corrupted, has nothing to do with children and everything to do with money and making lawyers rich!
And unaccountable
Absolutely
Absolutely agree, and the law guardians, CPS.
It is a vicious spiteful form of abuse. A narcissistic parent has so much hate and anger towards the other parent that they decide they are the only fit one to raise their children. It mostly occurs during family separations and custody battles. Once loving, kind respectful children
Listening to this gives me chills. This is absolutely sick.
Thank you for speaking up. Your voice will help in the war against parental alienation
Absolutely
This is terrible, I’m a woman and my ex is keeping me from my children. I was going to go get my children. But hearing your story I’m going to let the courts handle everything. I don’t want to add more trauma to my children. But I fear they think I don’t want them. It’s been a month. They was supposed to return after summer but my ex is not releasing them to me. I just filled paperwork.
OMG Ryan, you have me in tears listening to your story because it is hitting home with what my husband has been going through as a father for the last 4 years of being alienated from his son. It is like you are describing the exact same details as if it a script these mothers are taught. My husband & I are listening together and want to thank you sooooooo much for telling your story. This is what I tell my husband all the time that one day his son's mother won't have control anymore and his son will seek him out and to never lose hope. I am so sorry you had to go through this and excited for you at the same time for your rekindled relationship with your father! God bless you!
Hi Tracy. I am the stepmom in the parental alienation story too. I've watched the mother drive a wedge between my husband and stepson for 9 years. Sometimes I want to do more to try to stop it. Other times I realize the more I get involved, the more aggressive the mother gets. She's always had to be in control. Our boy "decided on his own that he doesn't want to visit his father for the weekend anymore" when he was 15 and during the pandemic when he was home with his mother all the time. He just graduated high school and things are getting a little better now that he turned 18. he still lives with his mother and doesn't stay overnight with us ever since 15, but now we can go out and celebrate things like birthdays and Father's Day together.
@@kristenwishart453 so good to hear that things are getting better for your husband and you!! Love hearing the positive stories!
Unfortunately, for us, my husbands son graduated high school 2 years ago and got further apart from his Dad.
He changed his middle name (was his Dad's first name ) and his last name. That hit my husband hard.
For some odd reason, he texts his Dad every so often to say how college is going & even wished him Happy Father's Day...which he used to forget to do before! Not sure if guilt may be setting in...who knows. My husband doesn't answer back.
Stop making it a gendered issue. It's both mothers and fathers being alienated.
Yes my heart goes out to all of you! I am still fighting for my son & daughter and dealing with “Parental Alienation” for almost two years now. God with us! ❤️🤘✝️
I absolutely agree. I am so glad you shared your story. People just don't realize how very serious this is. It should be criminal. It is child abuse.
Thank you for the story it brought tears to my eyes,iam going through kinda the same thing except my son is on the autism spectrum its so difficult , thanks so much for this channel
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR VIDEO! i am going through this right now. my son is 16 years old and my heart is broken.
I KNOW EXACTLY HOW YOU FEEL MY DAUGHTER IS 18 NOW AND I HAD TO SERVE A YEARS PROBABTION HERE IN CANADA UNDER FALSE CHILD ABUSE CHARGES, ITS UNREAL!🥶🇨🇦
Stay hard brother 💔❤️🩹💪
These people should either be in jail for child abuse or tested for mental illness and then be restricted to supervised access.
I am glad you were able to reunite with your dad.
On December 17, 2010 was the date I was ambushed. It was such a set-up and the first time that my ex told me that our daughter didn't like me. A statement so far fetched and un-real that I just looked over at our daughter and she slightly shook her head and looked down at the floor. My ex then jumped in and said, "well, those weren't her exact words..." and I knew that they weren't anything close. Our daughter and I had an incredible relationship.
But that was then.
The sad thing is that now my ex has succeeded (she has "won") and brainwashed our daughter to hate not only me but her step-mother and sisters. Our daughter is trapped, isolated, and being emotionally and psychologically abused.
Joe Barrow,
Alienated dad
Founder www.April25.org
and www.Parentalalienationvideos.com
Joe, I can't tell you how much I relate to your story. I'm so sorry this happened to you. TRAPPED is a excellent word to use. The controlling parent holds all the cards, making it very difficult for the child to speak up. In my case it wasn't until I started to get out in the "real world" and had other influences that light bulbs started turning on and realizing that things didn't add up as I had been brainwashed into believing. How old is your daughter now?
April2.5, don't lose hope as Ryan states. You are not alone and these children will become adults and finally have a say in their lives and not be "trapped" anymore and you will have your daughter back. My husband's case is all went to crap when the mother remarried and step daddy now became daddy so my husband had to be pushed out somehow. Now he calls my husband Mike and doesn't want to see him because he has a new daddy.
RyanThomasSpeaks My daughter just turned 16.
Tracy Foraker Still holding on to hope because we had such an amazing relationship. It was as perfect as you could imagine, she was my best friend. A part of her still loves me, but there is no way she can not show it.
April25.org: A Case for Parental Alienation I hate to hear this for you and so many other real dads!
I was ambushed 2 weeks ago... Lost my son to it. He doesn't want to be with me, and now his mother won't let me speak to him (and I have 50/50 custody). I have to unscrew this situation now. Thank you for sharing this. Powerful, and courageous.
So what happened?
Thank you soooooo much for making these videos. You tell of your experiences so clearly and understandably. It almost makes me sick to my stomach hearing them because I have been on the receiving end of this kind of abuse for so many years, but I am thrilled that the word is finally getting out and the public is being educated as to this insidious abuse, Way too many of us parents and grandparents have had to endure this for too many years. I've been the targeted parent and grand parent of parental alienation for 40 years. I'm glad my ex-husband was only able to alienate 1 of our three sons, but after he died, my oldest son then took over where his dad left off and tried to turn my other sons and grandchildren against me along with anyone else he can get to listen to him. My life has been so painful because of it. Parental alienation has attacked what is most precious to me, my family. And yet the perpetrators look so innocent and are so convincing in the lies they tell. I have a daughter-in-law who has told my son lies about me, as well, and I can no longer be alone with any of his children. What are the odds that I would have 3 people in my family who have all done the same thing to me? My ex-husband, my son and my daughter-in-law. Sometimes it's just too much. But, there is hope now that people are talking about the subject. Maybe the public's eyes will finally be opened and those of us who have suffered for so many years can get our families back together. I look forward to the day when one of my alienated grand children approaches me and says, "Grandma, I do not believe the lies I was told about you. I know you're not the kind of person they told me you were." I live for that day. Please keep making videos. Maybe one of these days one of my grandchildren will hear you and know they were lied to.
I was the dad it also happened to. 20 years later, I could not ask for a better relationship with my two daughters and 3 grandkids.
So whats your story and how did it change?
How did you get them back ? Help.
Please tell your story ...
Please tell your story
Thank you for sharing your story. I pray for your success. Eighteen years later... both my daughters and I have suffered anxiety/depression, self image distortions, & low-self esteem. Drug use and suicide attempts. My youngest daughter just died in May from a drug overdose and I read her journals... She felt horrible about herself and the more I pushed for the truth to be acknowledged, the more pain it was adding on her. The guilt... The shame... I was so busy fighting for my motherhood and it was causing them more harm. My other daughter resents me for trying to get the truth out. I do believe the guilt would eat her too, so I don't bring it up anymore. Our relationship is strained as she still blames me for how her life has turned out. All I can say to any parent feeling that alienation where they once had a good relationship with their children... find help immediately, even contact the school counselor. It doesn't take long for a line to be crossed that is very hard to come back from. It took years for me to put the pieces together because no one told me what he was going around saying and it never occured to me that he might do something like that. I've been broken for years and now that Joni is dead, my life is forever altered. I exist until my death, and I welcome that. With my luck, I'll outlive my other daughter and my ex.
My new wife found this on the weekend. Thanks for sharing this and what you're doing. I've been divorced for eight years, my ex wife and her family are 'the regime' who poison my daughter against me constantly, is constantly going against the court ordered separation agreement, constantly trying to remove my access, has lied to the courts and child services people trying to build a case against me in that I'm a bad, irresponsible parent. My 11 year old daughter is confused and while I know she loves me and her mum, she is rather withdrawn and often emotionless, even at the loss of a family pet I'm sure she loved. She also has made dragging me into court her new hobby in the way of bleeding me dry financially through the court system. Hell, I just spent $18,000 over 18 months in legal fees to clear up a lie she told to the courts which resulted in my daughter being taken away from me and a restraining order. I was successful in getting my access back but the authorities said I should get more vacation access per year and the evil one has now gone against the court order, scheduled her vacation time over my court ordered access time and I'm told I can't make up my court ordered access time... by her lawyer. Back to court we go. :(
I'm curious Ryan... if you were 11 or 12 years old and in your situation... and your dad showed you your videos; would you see yourself in this situation or would you have been so brainwashed by the regime that you'd think that stuff happens to others, but not you. I'm struggling with trying to keep my daughter out of this as much as I can, but at what point do I start to work to open her eyes as to what's going on? She knows her mother hates me and she's told me her mother wants her to hate me as much as she does. But she loves me clearly, and is very fond of my new wife. Any advice?
I really wished he would’ve answered your question :/ same boat here
Very similar story here, I'm a Frenchman in Spain, trying to cope with the regime, all Spaniards. For the very first visit, my 10 yo daughter had already been poisoned immensely without my being capable of doing anything. They set me a very vicious ambush, my ex wasn't even there, my daughter didn't want to come and was screeching, her aunt crying, and that had a woman call the police. I got a restraining order until there is a lawsuit, many months have gone by already and I can't contact in any way. I really wonder how badly my daughter is poisoned, and it's so sad because I have no way to try to show her the truth, that I love her more than anyone. I will do anything I can to save her from the abuse she's suffering.
You can't tell someone they're brainwashed. Their life is easier when you're not in it due to the evil ex. I am going through this too and due to coercion by the alienating parent their reality is not the same as yours. They know when you're in their life it brings anguish. We can only hope that as they grow they'll see their parent for what they really are and realize you are the one who loves them.
Thank you Ryan for speaking out about this. These experiences must have been heart wrenching to endure. Eventhough my ex was a bit more covert about the alienation my daughter was brainwashed non the less. Now it has been 4 years with no contact, no invite to her wedding and probably no contact with any future grandchildren. Keep speaking up, maybe one day my estranged daughter will see this and a light bulb will go off. I have brought up PAS to her but she denies and says her father didn't brainwash her, I beg to differ. We divorced when she was just a baby so she has had a lifetime of conditioning that I am less than and that is how she treats me. I will be watching all of your new and exciting ventures you have in store.
Ryan your talk about Dad being Ambushed hit home with me. My Ambush was worse as they did an Ex-partee order against the father, Dad. That is were everyone was in the Courtroom except Dad, all the Court orders were signed against Dad. Dad could not see any one of his children for 7 years as Court orders. Years later to much water went under the bridge with no contact for 15 years. The Grapevine says they all have mental issues and Depressed all the time. Cannot get a job or keep one and still living with the Controlling parent in their 30's. My oldest son just made contact after 15 years and he is mad violent, angry, upset, depressed, swearing and I had to ask him what his problem was as Dad thought about walking away from all his issues. Every time he had a question for me the son was so far out of the truth. When I started to fill him in he thought I was lying and told him I'll show the papers to him. The son said it was funny how all 5 of them had Dad removed with no home or place to live as he and his friends had a good laugh at Dad's expense. My son shows no empathy, feelings and if all of the other children are like that son. What parent wants more drama in their lives years later. I cried for years over my children as though they are all died.
I as an alienated mother of 13 years applaud you, your story is so truthful, honest and heartfelt. I look forward to hearing more of your truth and about the father son relationship you have now. I had sadness when watching, as I could so relate you Ryan to my daughter Kiley who just turned 25, I have a very strong feeling if you and she were to ever meet you would be a powerhouse duo for parental alienation awareness. I by the end of your video, had changed from sadness to hope, which I haven't had much of as of late. I heard the power and amazing strength you have as a young man who went through this horrible situation. I have to say, hearing you talk about the future you have ahead of you with your dad made my heart sing
Wow, thank you for this message. Thank you for sharing your story as a mom, it also highlights the fact that parental alienation goes both ways. Either parent can alienate. Selfishness, control, and egocentrism is so toxic. How is your relationship with Kiley at this point? I can't wait to share more updates now that people like you want to hear more!
I'm going through the greatest pain of my life. My daughters mom has been trying to destroy my relationship with my daughter. It's videos like this that help leverage strength and understanding. Thank you 👍❤️🙏
I worry about my kids being screwed up from all the crazy nonsense they are going through. But you give me hope that they can survive all the redderick and become healthy well adjusted people.
I am a mother and have been alienated from my three precious children for almost 4 years. I never could imagine this happening. I just discovered your videos through a narcissist support group. Thank you for bringing hope of one day being reunited with my children. I have felt hopeless.
You've given me hope. Thank You so much. I'm a father going through this with 4 now adult children. It's been heart breaking countless night's of crying like a baby. But after watching this and countless others I'm finally starting to understand WHY now I know and have always believed that I just didn't know what to call it until I stumbled across some vids like your's you can't imagine the sense of relief I feel knowing other people are going through this. Again Thank You !
+RyanThomasSpeaks I was in tears by the end of your talk. This happens to so many, and goes unnoticed. Thank you for bringing awareness.
I'm going through this right now. My middle child has been turned but my other two are remaining loyal. Loyalty has its price as they are yelled at and told how ashamed their mother is. My daughter has planned running away. I thought I had got through to my son but she abused him, locked him in his room, didn't let him pat the dog and threw his iPad in the bin. Next he was with me he was acting up again and elbowed me in the face. I smacked him for it. He was taken to the police. I spent 5 full days in court mostly waiting. Never said a word or saw the evidence against me. I was pressured to take an undertaking without admissions (no plea, no trial) because ultimately this needs to play out in a proper family court. Regardless, I got given a 22 week men's violence program that I must undertake or face jail. I've looked it up. It is a Duluth Model program which means it's all about male privilege, power and entitlement in a patriarchal society where men are oppressors and women victims.
Thank You, Ryan!!! You are a very wise, brave person. I have hope that my daughter will think like you and eventually realize that I'm not who she was trained to think I am.
Thank You Ryan for giving we rejected parents a "Front Row Seat" as an example as to what we rejects endure. Bless you for being intuitive and emotionally capable to see beyond the staged scenario of the intended purpose to unfairly paint your dad as the "bad parent". My son had the front row when my ex pushed me against his house and I fell on the driveway. He then called 911 to "protect his children from my abuse". My son eventually was admitted to a Psych ward on suicide watch twice for being told what he saw did not happen. The police believed his cunning father and I was ordered off the property. Thank You Again.
I am an Alienated Mum, current,y reuniting with my 15 yr old son. My role as Parent is gone but we are building a new relationship... Thank you vey much for what you are doing to help stop this.
Thanks for sharing your story. My daughter is 5 years old. Her mother takes great pride in hurting my relationship with my daughter. For 2 years I have been trying to get my child back home. Her mother moved her 2700 miles away and could care less about my child's development. She only cares about how she can manipulate people into viewing her as a model person. Those that have been around her long enough start to see the mask drop.People contact me stating that they will testify to help me get my daughter because the mother sleeps around and does what a narcissist does. The problem is the way the courts handle this situation for fathers is extremely one sided and unfair. It is easily provable what she has done but the courts could care less about fairness. They assume she is sane because she is allowed to call in and they can't see the manipulation in person. I hope you are ok now and thanks again for sharing your story.
I'm loosing my little baby girl to this right now. As a 22 year old dad i don't know how to handle it. It all caving in so fast and i cant seem to get my facts together faster than they can make the DCF report and throw away my rights. I'm terrified and i thought i was alone... until now thank you :,( Much love from CT. A fatherless state.
you are NOT alone...and i wont go down silently!
I lost two sons and a daughter due to the same thing, but just to see that you saw what happened and recognized what your dad went through, makes me so happy, as if it was me that was in your dads shoes, thank you so much for what you are doing. I have a son 34 years old, a son 19, and a daughter 18, and they think I'm the dirt of the earth, and I made it a point to never speak bad about their mother. again, thank you, August
Man, I can relate to this. My poor kids have had to witness this type of incident too many times too. Those women are absolutely broken and evil.
What an incredibly powerful story. You are so articulate, your thoughts and feelings so well spoken that I had goosebumps watching this. I particularly liked how you explained how you felt as a child witnessing the drama and seeing/hearing your mother and her relatives tell lies. It's so important to remember that in the end, there is a CHILD who has to deal with all this and try to make sense of it.
My fiance has an 8-year-old son who is not alienated yet, but not for the lack of trying on his mother's part. She would fall in the "mild to moderate" alienator category at this time, but she is a narcissist/sociopath so there's no telling what will happen in the future. Ages 8 to 13 are supposedly the prime years for alienation. Meanwhile, my fiance is trying to maintain a good relationship with his son with the minimal time that he has (every other weekend and Wednesday nights).
Well done and bravo, Ryan. Thank you for speaking out!
--Lynne R.
Alienators LOVE to create a big scene, especially in front of the kids. I cannot tell you how many times this very scenario happened to me during exchanges. My husband filmed them and we started needing police to do a civil stand by. When cops were there he’d be on his BEST behavior, and flip the script.
Thomas. You are giving me the first and only small glimmer of hope that I've found in over 10 years of trauma from watching, helplessly as this abuse is destroying my 2 children. It is about to be made permanent in 2 weeks with the official removal of my "unenforceable" 50% custody that she has refused for years without consequence. Our judge has been extremely and openly bias in support of their mom from the very beginning of our divorce, despite her being openly unfaithful to our marriage. She even demanded, and was granted the right to remarry her new lover immediately after divorce, instead of the 1 year separation required by law! It's a small town and she has family friends in the police and court house... So I've no path back to my children that I can see. I can only hope and pray they will see in time what has happened and make a path back to me as adults, as you did. It seems to be rare in these cases though... Could you please describe how exactly you came to discover the truth and what, if anything, your father might have done to help bring it to your attention in a way that you could have seen at 13-17 years old? Thanks so much for your work in this subject!!
You're my hero.
I am still waiting for my sons.
thanks RT for using the correct term 'ambush'. Thats the way i described my alienation when i went to pick up my twin 8 year old daughters (8 months ago, now their 9) from their mother my ex. people dont understand it was pre-meditated. I am so sorry you went thru this as a child. Thank you for talking about it.
Wow, thank you so much for telling your story! My son’s ex and boyfriend rented a house. When it was my son’s time for visitation, she texted him that they had now moved to her new ‘permanent’ address to live with her mother. Well that didn’t make sense. But a lot didn’t make sense that she did. Her boyfriend told my son he could pick his son up at his ex’s mother’s house. I went with him. It was a 425 mile drive to get there.
My son took two steps into the yard and her boyfriend bellows out, ‘You’re Trespassing’! My son stopped, not really understanding what was going on. Her boyfriend paced back and forth on the front porch with his phone, apparently trying to get a signal. His face was very red. He looked furious and we had no idea why. That was 1.5 years ago. I don’t know what my grandson saw or thinks. He was almost 4. After about 5 mins of watching him pace in and out, we left to go to the police station, but flagged down an officer on the way there. He and his partner said they were sorry, but it was a civil matter and they couldn’t do anything, for the 3rd time. Apparently, the boyfriend was furious because the police were for some reason supposed to already be there to arrest my son for something that was supposed to happen? I don’t know. But I now believe his ex said they lived there so they would have witnesses to whatever was supposed to occur, but thankfully didn’t. I did hear the policeman talking to the county attorney on the phone who said, ‘I did see a paper yesterday, but I didn’t see it anywhere today’. My son was up to date on child support, so it wasn’t that. It took me quite a while to realize it was all a setup. My son figured out quickly he had been set up, but he had never said that to me until recently.
The small town there, the lawyer, judge, and boyfriend were all friends. It was hopeless to get any justice. My son is going at this a different way now, and we are praying and hoping he will prevail in a different court. She has moved 9x in 4 years, now over 1,000 miles away, from Texas to Michigan without anyone’s permission? Kidnapping, to erase my son, who faithfully always picked up his son? I don’t know.
But I appreciate your story so much, because I have been wondering how people could be so cruel as to set up a person who had done nothing wrong. We will see our little guy one day very soon, I believe. These people are too cruel and deceitful to be raising a child, in my opinion.
Thank you again!
Thank you. I feel vindicated, and hopeful. 5yrs 9mo NO CONTACT with my two beautiful daughters. We reunited a week ago. We are both scared to death. This is so sad. No child deserves this. No human deserves this. ☹️
The message at the end, your mission, thank God for you Ryan. I know this old but I am a 56 YO targeted parent and everything you talked about happening with your dad is happening to me now and yes it is about control. She even has the regime. I could tell you so much about my sons's mother is controlling, narcissistic, manipulative, possibly borderline personality disorder. I have been dealing with severe results and tactics of alienation for 6 years and have been researching PA all this time trying to get someone to listen to what is going on and it's as if no one even knows about it. She has now filed a PFA order that is based on lies and she filed it because my son said he wanted to live with us. Me and his little sister and his stepmom miss him so much and I am having a hard time now communicating with him bc he is suffering PAS. He's been totally brainwashed at this point now and the whole family has taken part in that as will as professionals who have been mislead and disregard any sign that there is PA going on. If anyone who is familiar with PA got involved and evaluated what is happening to me now they would see it so clearly and could perhaps testify before the court as an expert and shed light on it so the Judge could look for signs in my son when he brings him into court in March of 21. It is so awful a feeling to be held just short of seeing him face to face to try and repair the damage right now when it is important and could be done so he could recover at age 15, but moreover to be a 56 YO father who has been stripped of all ability to parent and do something as a recognized parental authority to help facilitate that end and help my son, oh I just can;t tell how powerless and helpless and defeated I feel right now. The depression and the trauma of that PFA order and the court dragging things out with continuances that have now extended it to 18 mos without ever addressing he allegations she made, that I can defend against with hard evidence to prove she lied btw, is wearing on me so bad right now that I am tired and weak and not able to sleep right. I'm not able to function and be as present for my 12 YO daughter as I used to be right now. I'm dozing off in the middle of the day and not getting REM sleep till much later in the evening. My mind is consumed with this ordeal and has been ever since she had me served in a parking lot with my wife and daughter there as we handed him off back to her and her mother at a dance school that day. She literally set me up to be served there. My son was only trying to establish some independence as a 13 yo boy who wanted to do something different and he was sick of the drama with his mother that continued to be such a struggle for him. I could have filed and abuse order against her before she did it tome and I would have been justified but that wasn't something I thought about or even wanted to start up because I always felt we should be able to resolve things as a family, but boy how I underestimated her and now I feel so ashamed for not being more aggressive as his dad. My case is so clear, I don;t see how anyone wouldn't see it, I don't see how the court can;t be aware of PA and how it is being done to me and his little sister now. All I wanted was to share parenting in his life and for he and his sister to know and love each other. His mother is a classic alienator. I just wish I had someone who knew and could listen to my story so maybe I could get some confirmation, not just for me but also in helping me to know how I might address it all and be able to repair this damage to my boy before it leaves him scarred as a young adult. I;m not interested in revenge, though I do want the family court judge to end it with some reprimand and perhaps making me whole again, but mostly I really just want to help my son, Just want to help him and fix things for his and his sister's relationship.
OH my gosh. This makes me sick! This happened to me! I am so sorry you went through that.
Thank you...my son has lost his 2 daughters to a wicked mom. He has not seen his daughters for one year...and he is an amazing dad and person...I cry with him. Please keep up the good work.
My son is now 17+, it's been 2+ year's since I've seen him - I'm 54. This takes years to reconcile, and the chances that I'll see him again is near impossible. All the best , God Bless but reconciliation is year's most of us don't have.
Glad to see that kids can come through this and see how manipulated they were. So abusive.
Hello Ryan, thank you for being real and being transparent. I have been separated and heading for divorce. I have witnessed and continue to encounter these evil atracks. My kids are 16 and 14 years old. This wicked behavior brings confusion to a child. Ryan, when I decided to follow Christ, is when the attacks and lies increased even more. I am still holding on to my faith, and while doing so, I will continue to do my best to show them unconditional love. I would like to join you on this journey to fight against parent alienation anyway I can. For any parent who is struggling with this wicked behavior, I want to encourage you, to anchor yourself in Christ He has given me strength in the most difficult times. I am learning not to focus on the negativity in what I hear or see, but to believe and focus on the finish product, which is healing and restoration for the alienated children. If anyone wants to contact me for any reason even for prayer please do so.
Wow!! when I hear this it brings back so many memories, of which I'm not even sure my kids remember. They were 8 and 10. I had a court order to go pick them up for Easter. A few days before the kids were forced to call me and tell me not to come, they had other plans. Daddy had planned a trip to the farm and invited friends so they didn't want to go with me. Well, I showed up anyway and in my case, the Father and Step-mother ordered the kids out in the street to scream at me, why did I come, we don't want to go with you, etc.etc. Mind you, my children happen to be in Argentina (international case) and I had to travel 14,000 miles to see them. I called the police, they came and told me I could "force" the children to go with me. My kids were crying and so traumatized I decided to walk away and not "force" them to go with me. I told them mommy would be waiting if they decided they wanted to see me. This is ONLY ONE of MANY for 12 years. The pain I feel for my kids that they have had to go through this is almost more than I can bare at times. Ryan, your videos will help SO MANY children realize first, what they've been put through and second they are NOT ALONE. Thank YOU...
Ryan, I'm so grateful for your openness, it gives me hope. My former husband, parents are siblings have told huge convincing lies about me, so much so that I haven't seen my grown kids and grandkids that I babysat for 10 years, in 5 years. I was inspired to go and I was sitting quietly at my Father's funeral. My sister created such a commotion called the police to have them physically remove me.
Sharing this video is so incredibly important Ryan. It has helped me when I am at a real low point with my alienated daughter and my battle to see her.
I feel so bad that you had to go through this. And the fact that my daughter has had to live through this for 14y makes me sick. And the fact that the judges and lawyers in family court make things worst for the child and the targeted parent leaves me without words. I haven’t seen or heard from my daughter in over 5y.
This is so angering !! Can't believe how manipulative people can be
Should I start making videos about my story? You are a total inspiration for me and i don't know why but you remind me of my son Sheamus and I hope that one day he and my other 3 children speak out about everything with as much passion as you do. I am so sick of everything. My mother and I both know it never changes, it is beating a dead horse, it never gets better. The alienating parties and the court system care nothing for these kids. Much like it was for you in your story, it is always either the battle royale, or it is complete and total alienation, and by that I mean months and years and total silence. I have paid close to 15 to 20 thousand dollars in debts to lawyer fees et cetera fighting to see my kids and regain control and custody and nothing ever ever changes. Ever.
God be with us all going through this terribly painful injustice. Injustice to the child and injustice to the targeted parent. Vengeance is mine says the lord.
OMG The strict pick up time happened to me so many times. She even took him as a toddler and hid him at her mothers when I was 5 minutes late due to traffic once.
I can barely type so bern with me. This is happening to my right now. My ex wife is a borderline/narcissist and she has turn my kids against me. First my daughter at 6 months after the separated and now my son 14 months after separating. I’ve studied this front and back . I started a long time ago because I was going insane from her emotional abuse and I just started googling issues. I’m so terrified right now . I can’t see my kids. She’s blocked me in their phones and I can’t do anything about it right now because of Coronavirus. But I can see it. I’m right at the edge of losing the next 10 or 20 30 years. I can’t take it She’s gets away with everything . Her mom and dad team up just like u said and they all go after me and warp my kids minds and I got no on help. I need help desperately. They are the real deal Everything you read or hear about. There is no boundaries with them. They will just flat out lie about anything. I just need someone who knows this and can prove it to a judge. Most people don’t know. They believe it all. They don’t know or see the splitting in my children. The lack of empathy. The sense of entitlement. The way they speak is not recognizable for kids their age. They couldn’t possibly have the perspective at 13 ,14 years old. Even their text messages, cover the name and it’s identical to the stuff she says. Yet they always get away with it. She’s 40 , we got 3 kids, one is autistic, and she leaves at midnight and comes home at 7 am completely drunk and lucky to even be alive , when my kids are waking up and have no one to take care of them especially the youngest. He’s just 10 and has a lot of struggles Yet her parents , cousin who facilitates the partying , even my kids now all defend it. Or actually even ignore it. No one ever says ‘ hey you left your kids alone all night to get plastered and do god knows what and render yourself incapable of caring even for yourself’. And the topic and argument? I was there at 7 am because I knew from a friend who drove by on his way to work that her car was gone. So I’m a stalker. That’s all that’s discussed . And it’s like that with everything and it’ always flies. No one ever steps in and says anything but me. So I’m
Crazy. I just need help. I’ve even tried mailing Dr Craig Childress. For no better reason than this is such a clear cut case of alienating by a pathological parent and her supporters, all in its absolute most evil and covert way. It probably would be good to study honestly. I’m pretty sure I have ptsd from all this crap and it’s all I can do to just not break down in tears every 5 minutes. I just want someone to help. Some one that understands
It’s so crazy people just think I’m making it up. Those who’ve dealt with this know i way I mean. I’m in Texas outside of Dallas. I will find a way to pay. Please . I’m on RUclips begging for help to a world of strangers. These are my kids. They are good kids. Absolutely wonderful hearts and she’s destroying them. They already have scars that will never heal. She’s gonna turn them into just like her family. I feel like I can’t save them. I hAve so much proof but it’s like no one even cares. I’m just , I don’t even know how to describe it. I need a miracle from god to save my children
three years later after fighting International Parental Child Abduction and Parental Alienation, i finally have access to m,y son, and am using this video and your other content on your website to try to get through to the mother and educate her, and myself to work together to avoid this. The mother still needs to renounce her need to include the child in her resentment, but i think if i can get her to watch your content more, then we can safely say, that your content is serving its purpose. Bless you Ryan, i was a child of parental alienation and international divorce between two countries, as is my son.. and your content is an essential part of my repair project. With me, it starts with giving from my side, and waiting for the generosity to work its magic on the other parent.. but till now, nothing is being given back. I just asked her to watch this video of yours, but said she should absorb al your content, because this video shows anger at the mother's misdeeds, but later, whenj we watch all your videos, and read your website, we can see you progress to work towards an unbiased non hateful addressing of the issue, a deconstruction of it, and work for all parties, both the parent left behind, and the alienating parent, to develop a fair and compassionate solution, that leads all involved back towards a happy life, and healthy loving relationship with both parents
It hurts just to listen to this!!! My son's life the last 10 years. He's still fighting for his kids.
Dude I am so glad you talked about this!
Thousands probably millions of men go through this!
Dealt with similar ambushes from my ex husband and his new wife. Was traumatic for me and my children. He has recently managed to alienate me from my youngest and this gives me hope we will reunite. My oldest sees the truth and had cut his father out 2 years ago at age 15 but he tells anyone who will listen that I’m the reason his son won’t have contact. It breaks my heart daily and
breaks my heart that my son had to make that choice. The family court system is so uneducated on psychological abuse.
Thank you, Ryan. What a sad story, and what an awesome outcome for you and your dad. I pray for something similar for myself and my children. The alienation poison is like a blowtorch to my soul.
I have been alienated from my daughter for more than 16 years. Before the alienation happened, I learned a number of tricks used by my ex and her new husband to destroy my once great relationship with my daughter. Among them were things like connecting a fax machine to the phone line, when I was supposed to call her, throwing away a scooter I brought her, because it was "dangerous", giving me wrong times of important events that my daughter participated in, bashing me in front of her or letting her "overhear" bad opinions about me, not letting me bring her a bread she liked, which was not available, where she lived, cancelling my visits, because I "did not call" (my calls were not answered...) and many more... At the time, I think, I did not really know the actual purpose of those actions or wrongly believed that the relationship between my daughter and me was so strong that it could not be destroyed. As for most alienated parents, the rejection came suddenly and without a warning, underscoring my naïve beliefs. The extent of the campaign against me conducted by my ex and her new husband is best illustrated by an event that happened a while after my parental role was limited exclusively to paying child support. My daughter suddenly called me. She was crying and asked me why I wanted to destroy her life... I think, the majority of parents commenting on this video have similar experiences. I also believe that people watching videos on parental alienation are rejected and alienated parents. All of us know how the alienation hurts and most of us, if not all, know how it destroys children. Most of us tried different ways to reverse the alienation and failed, even though many of our attempts were already based on an extensive knowledge of the phenomenon. I think it is extremely important, when the child victims of parental alienation speak up. Their voice, if heard by others who went through a similar ordeal, may help them realize what they have been deprived of, reach out to their alienated parents and heal.
Thanks for this videos. I had a situation that was similar. I was the parent being Alienated. They did so many tactics but they played games and forced my daughter to call her step parent mom. Because her other children were confused. To this day my daughter still calls her mom. I found this out from my young child's mouth. This is just one thing they did. It breaks my heart my daughter is 25 and completely brainwashed and I tried to wake her up a bit. It didn't work. But I hope the things I said she thinks about. They have had her since she was 9 but they were doing tactics as early as maybe 2. So I hope your videos can help parents and the children to wake up. All they need is just a little seed of doubt. All of this narcissism is running through my family and my daughter's family. I'm the only woke individual in both families. I hope that my daughter being so smart and the scapegoat that she wakes up soon. I figured everything out last year at age 48. If I had known what was going on fully I would have Fought harder. But I wasn't strong enough and had zero help. I left her dad when she was like 11/2. I should have ran far away then. I made the mistakes in trusting her father. Its a long story. I'm writing everything done so if I pass my roommate can give my daughter all the information. I just hate she is still under their control. She is in her 2nd toxic narcissistic relationship. And I believe she is seeing it. But is stuck. I have pretty much been blocked from her life with no contact for a year in August so next month will be a year. Hardest year ever. But I have learned a lot in this year to better help myself and to help her. I have reached out with no response. The last time I saw her the time was sabotaged by them and her boyfriend. All I asked was to have her spend a night at a concert with me just me and her. They made her believe that I was unfair to not let them have her for part of the concert. And well I let her do what she wanted. And she brought her boyfriend over to where we were. And well I never got time with her really alone. I tried to hold back tears at the Evanescence concert. The songs hit very close to home. And her utter disrespect was hard to deal with. But I didn't reach. But I did the hard things. I sent her books I hope she read. One was Inherited trauma and the other was about parental alienation. I was probably a big joke. But I don't care if she doesn't want to talk to me because of it. The seed needed planted at 25. She has to wake up. I hope she is because I'm so tired of being away from my daughter. The Alienation caused me to gain a 150 pounds and I lost about 80 of it and I've gained it back. So now I'm working on me just me. So she can have a healthy happy mom to come back to hopefully. But the sadness never goes away. The shame never goes away that I let them do this to her. I just appreciate so much your courage making these videos. So proud of you and the awareness you are spreading. I really have wanted to make videos for people too. I'm not there yet but I do plan to do this too. But from the moms view of what happened. I'm just waiting for my child to wake up. Thanks for your kindness and help with all your videos. I'm so sorry you had to go through this as a child an a udult. No one should have to feel the way you did.
I won't even begin. People have no idea how the court system, the police, the lawyers and the hate manifests. Descriptions would seem unreal. The nightmares, the subsequent ptsd, the realization of what humanity is, is debilitating, depressing, and the will to even live in this world is hard to come by after experiencing the loss of my children, 9 years ago. Sick.
This is CLASSIC PARENTAL ALIENATION! I feel sick as I have witnessed similar when my son's fiancé went to pick up my granddaughter!
I think what you are doing with these videos is amazing. I have witnessed and been a victim of this in many ways at many different times in my life and the pain that this creates for the child, for a lifetime, is nothing to taken lightly. People need to be made aware of the devastation that this creates in the childs life and future and present relationships. Thank you for being conscientious enough to see the reality of all sides of the story and brave enough to put it out there.
God bless you for sharing your story. My Narcissistic ex and her Narcissistic family are actively brainwashing my innocent children. I'm trying to save them from the same pain you have endured. I'm glad you have the wisdom to break through the manipulation.
Thank you Ryan. My grandkids are going through this. Their father is alienating me. They lost their mom.
Jesus, I'm dealing with this right now with my 16yo daughter. It's killing me, because I see it happening more and more and I'm stuck for how to deal with it. When she's at home; I do the best that I can to keep things as normal as possible. But in my heart, I feel like I'm dying inside almost to the point of hopelessness. I am so sorry for all of the parents who've been place in this position. I used to be the praying kind; but when god didn't intervene I lost faith. Just know that I'm thinking of all of you and hoping that things work out for the best sooner, than later. Hugs from Colorado.
ColoradoLady72 God is all over this.God will bring it together x have hope,stay sane first,then keep your own life going because when they come back into your life,you have grown and will be an incredible role model to your child,even if they are ‘grown’ ,be strong momma.dont talk or criticise the other parent.be positive around that child,on the phone or in letters.keep the line of communication open.always xxxx make it clear you have no anger or resentment.just be loving.and positive.however hard!!!! Write beautiful loving letters.keep them updated about your life.make it seem happy and nice.xxx it might take time,but one day they will respond xxx and walk right back into your life xxx I am the same,but I keep going because I will be a grandparent one day,and those grand babies will need me!!!! They aren’t taking that from me!!! And Hun....the more you fight the alienator(s),the MORE they LIKE it.cut contact with them and just txt your daughter everyday,or once a week,no recriminations,no hurt,no anger.just be there.even if no response.if it gets too much have a break but then go back to messaging whenever you want,or feel the urge,xxxx always txt or send cards or letters for Christmas and birthdays xxx don’t give any ammo to the alienators in being ‘angry’ or the ‘bad’ parent.just do what you know to be right without feeding into their games.stay pleasant,stay detatched xxx look into coda or alanon.it helps to get support in dealing with spiritually sick people.
God will always help those who are with Him
I just discovered you! I’m so sorry you had to go through this. My son has been alienated from me since 2019. He’s almost 18 now. Thank you for being so honest and open about what you went through.
Dear Ryan,
this is the far best description of what is happening to my kids and me since almost seven years.
I can't change it ... went to court, did everything right ... everything bad was thrown against me without any evidence. I see my kids in you, they are 15/13/11 ... I hope they are strong enough to survive the killing of half of their identity ... please keep posting videos ! All my love to you !
Thank you. shine that flashlight bright. I have 3 kids and divorced a NARC 6 yrs ago. I got sole custody but was always flexible with time and as a result he stomped on it but if kids wanted to i continued to. well now, my youngest was encouraged to run away thinking it was his idea because life with me was hell and his father hsa twisted every thing to make me look like bad parent and my son does not want to see me. i have thought of giving up as he does not seem to care but i know he does deep down. we had an awesome relationship. when he went to dads told him to have fun and when with me focused on building our relationship. i know i have to show up and not give up. i love my son too much to let our relationship be destroyed
These videos are very interesting and helpful. Thank you for making them.
I wish I could upvote this video a million times. This sounds EXACTLY like I am going through with my extremely narcissistic ex wife and our only kid who is now an adult and hasn’t spoken to me in over five years.
THANK YOU RYAN! You are saving my relationship between my daughters and I. I will not give up on us and I am stronger now after watching this episode. So Thank YOU! I'm grateful for RUclips to gather similar channels and help me find more support. You are my earth angel, and I'm so sorry that you had to experienced that at 8. You've given me so much hope
While not nearly as dramatic, I am going through something very very similar with my 3 kids. I am the one that had the affair, but for nearly 5 years, I have been vilified by my ex and her "regime", with numerous posts about me on facebook by my ex, in addition to constantly evading contact via phone, letters, e-mail, skype, etc... I am fought at every turn to arrange visits. Literally dozens of reports with CPS after months of no contact, not being informed about major medical emergencies, not being informed when they moved out of state for months at a time, ... I ache for my children, and am preparing myself to help them deal with their resentment that they will undoubtedly hold against their mother and her family. I salute you, friend. Keep up the fight.
Thank you for speaking out from the child's perspective. My husband is in your dad's position and his son had told him he no longer wants to see him. I explained to my husband that that is exactly how a child would feel, they just want it to stop. My husband hurts everyday and this video has helped him more than you will ever know! How is your relationship with mom now? God Bless you!
My husband and I feel your pain Beth. I prayer daily for these parents who are kept from the other parent. It saddens and sickens me that it's even allowed to continue.
Tracy Foraker
Thank you for your kind words. I am thankful for Ryan coming forth and speaking on this. His insight is a gift!
Very similar to what happened to me!
My wife, her family and friends did all they could to totally destroy me and my reputation. This is a very insightful video . . .
I’m your Dad in this situation. And I’m crying. I love my son so dang much and she’s hurting me so much in this divorce. My son was so mad at me at the exchange today (he is 3). He had the most angry face and said, “Daddy, why did you sell the house!” He doesn’t even understand the concept of the word sell! You should have seen how angry his face was. The truth is I loved our house, my spouse, and especially my son… our family. She was physically abusing him, threatened suicide, and threatened my life. Then filed for divorce. It’s been devastating to me and my son. Now, she’s saying to him things like, “show me your muscles!” When I’m in a wheelchair. I’ve spent $50,000 in court trying to keep my son safe. I would go into debt (which is one of my big no no-s in life for myself) to keep my son safe. He’ll never get to see this portion of my love for him. We were both the victims of her and now she’s turning him against me. “Daddy took the TV away” “Daddy sold the house.” “Daddy is the bad guy.” I can’t tell you the helplessness I feel. I’m not even trying to get you guys on my side. It’s just this emptiness I feel the minute my son leaves me. I love him so much. Your Dad loves you. I don’t know how to combat this and I may not live long enough for him to get married where your friend says “you look just like your dad.” I’ve got disabilities and so he might hate to look like me by the time he’s your age. I don’t know what to do. He is my everything. I may not live long enough to show him how much I love him. Sorry to unload on you, I don’t feel good at the moment and feel empty and am not trying to make you feel sorry for me. I just want you to know your dad loves you. I may not be able to explain it to my son so maybe I can help your Dad with your relationship. I just want the best for you. The best for my son.
My Son was twenty when I lost him, it took my ex less than a month to 'brainwash' him, I knew she was doing it at the time because like with your dad, my ex blatantly projected her deeds onto me. Recently I tried my own hand at deliberate 'manipulation'. It was all too easy to bear bait him on FB, but the result is that I 'manipulated him into organising a counselor of his choosing to "resolve the dispute" (the one I deliberately created and refused to apologize for), my only condition was that he choose a degree qualified psychologist. The first few sessions have dashed my hopes for a quick recovery, his emotional walls are more like a fortress. The word "identify" hits the nail on the head, if the discussion starts heading that direction he becomes agitated and aggressive, other than that he behaves normally. One good sign is that he is having extreme difficulty expressing what it is that upsets him
Thanks for making the videos (takes a lot of balls to do something like that), they have given me some good tips, the light bulb metaphor is a good one, I've warned my son to try to avoid treating his mum like he has treated me if/when "the penny drops" I know nothing about your mum but I do know my ex has hated half of herself for all her life, and the half she hated really was a violent insectious alcoholic who "reigned"over his family like a cult leader. Not long after he died she went off the rails for 5yrs on a mix of alcohol and zoloft, but we get along ok now, she has genuinely tried to help for the past 5yrs but her baggage gets in the way, she turns into her father when threatened, she frequently feels threatened by non-obvious triggers, to the extent that she sometimes passes out from the panic attack. Having said that, she has been fully aware of her disorder for almost 20yrs now, for the entire time she has a clear choice in front of her, she can stop hiding her illness and feeding it red wine, anytime she chooses.
Thank you for doing what you do, I was raised by an alienating mother too, and now my daughter is too. Thank you, God bless you.
I'm a Father that was done just like your Dad was done. My children now are your age and now my children/ sons will be living in my new house. They have told me this same story all most word for word as you have. so it was worth all that I went through/hell at each visitation. But I never missed seeing them
I'm typing about 7 minutes in and still watching and astonished beyond!
I just listened to more and found you you were 25 years old. I am so sorry you have gone through this. We are still in the middle of it all. She is 15 and its been 4 1/2 years away from us. Her situation is just as horrible and she is believing it.
Dude there's no other person who could explain this than someone who has been through it.
You have no idea what your testimony is doing for fathers who are going through this.
It's amazing how you are able to recall this and you understand exactly what has happened to you , you saw everything for yourself.
I tell my child's mother this all the time, I tell her, don't worry the kids will see you for who you are.
Would love to see some videos from your dad hearing how he was able to cope with everything he went through and stay connected with you despite all of the interference. This is where I’m at and I’m going on five years
Wow this is so precious too listen! My 5 year old son is being alienated now for 3 years. Such a painful time. Thanks for giving me hope!
This is so true. Well done Ryan. I wait for the day my daughters see this. 💔
Thanks for speaking out about parental alienation. This most definitely could fit more than parental alienation this also fits the domestic violence against men and how nothing is being done. Men do face domestic violence more than women but it is considered harmless against them because they are stronger.
Parental alienation is very destructive and I've seen my niece go through behind the sidelines i helped should light of her dad. Parental alienation Needs to stop.
Thank you again for finding the motivation to share and make a difference.
I cannot thank you enough. To have the perspective of a concerned child has so much potential to change people's minds - as alienating parents always hide behind the so called "well-being" of the child. I get routinely rejected by my 14 and 17 year old kids when I want to go in for something with them. Their mother always blames puberty (adolescence) for that, but we have a long story of alienation already behind us. So although I am not insisting on undertaking something with them when they themselves claim to "have no time" - I am still quite unsure about this and wheather I should insist anyways. On top of that I know that their mother is trying to tell them I would be kind of "addictive" to them as my kids and me myself would not be too self-dependend. Again: How can you do it right, without looking indifferent at the same time.I really cannot tell wheather they want to really see me or just think they have to pretend.
Sorry for the long text...
Thank you sooo much for your perspektive. Wish there would be similar sites in german !!! Keep it up, eventually you are very important for lots of people !
Michael, Ingolstadt, Germany
You are a hero for speaking out. I hope one day soon I can be apart of my children's life aswell, so I can be the dad they need me to be.
A very powerful video; thank you very much for sharing your story. Very courageous. I am a targeted parent who has lost contact with my daughter so I know your dad's feelings. I am so glad you have reconnected, a true blessing.
This is me and my sons and my husband and his son having it on both sides is so difficult, I only hope that we can continue to have a loving relationship with them, I’m
so sorry for your experience it just breaks my heart, staying calm is the only choose we have as the victim parents but at least we know what we are dealing with, can I add thank god for video recording all drop off and pick ups, I feel that it helps protect these children at least to keep a record
You are amazing. Thanks so much for sharing and being so honestly RAW with your feelings and the truth behind this terrible issue. A very very dear friend of my is suffering from this and I am so happy she has someone like you to truly put a Human Presence and help to guide her as she incessendly tries to regain a relationship with her Children.. I know this must be somewhat painful for you but it is so appreciated by so many.. THANK YOU!!! Good luck to everyone dealing with these issues.!
Great video mate !! My wife left for another man over 15 months ago. I got on with my life and focussed on the kids seeing them 12 nights per month for the last 12 months !! 9 weeks ago the weekend I was due to pick my kids up for Father's Day the mother called the cops and made insane allegations and I haven't so much as spoken to my babies for 9 weeks !! I have been struggling to cope and I'm terrified that my kids won't be as strong willed as you and will forget me. My sons birthday has come and gone and they wouldn't even let me speak to him !!! Sick. My little girl is 7 and my son is sick. I love them so much and the mother knows this is killing me !!! I can never understand why she is doing this when she left me !!! Thanks again for giving me hope that the kids will see the truth in the end !! Paul.
Great hearing this. I feel so bad for all kids that have to go through this and the other parent. Thank you
Thank you for speaking up! Your video is so very sorely needed. I am an alienated father. I pray that someday, somehow, my own children stumble upon your video, and their eyes may be opened.
I haven't seen my son since he was 8, he hates me as his mother successfully removed me from his life. No hope for me now as a dad, but hope his life turns out ok.
Matthew Clifford, there is always hope. This alienation is all to real for me too. Don’t ever give up on the child.
Matthew Clifford, there is always hope. This alienation is all to real for me too. Don’t ever give up on the child.