I'm New To Orthodoxy But My Husband Isn't Interested... Advice?

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  • Опубликовано: 21 дек 2024

Комментарии • 44

  • @ajmartinez1470
    @ajmartinez1470 День назад +40

    I'm new to Orthodoxy. My wife is a muslim but she wants to go to church with me too. Prayers are very much appreciated.

    • @iplyrunescape305
      @iplyrunescape305 День назад +1

      Prayers for you brother. I have faith she will convert as Im sure a Muslim woman alone is near unheard of in Islam. If she will stay with you, she will convert eventually. Prayers 🙏

    • @wispfire2545
      @wispfire2545 14 часов назад

      Prayers.

  • @l.-._.-._.-._.-._.-.l
    @l.-._.-._.-._.-._.-.l День назад +16

    My girlfriend asked what I wanted for Christmas and I told her I want us to go to an orthodox service. I have been reading books about orthodoxy, after being an atheist for a long time and found a restored faith in Jesus. I'm tired of feeling spirituality empty inside and am ready to begin shedding my vices that are keeping me down. I hope that we both feel the Holy Spirit.

  • @hetiseennacht
    @hetiseennacht День назад +25

    My sons (in their 20s) and myself converted to Orthodoxy. My wife initially was vehemently opposed. She said that she would not attend our chrismations. But now, after a few years, has become more accepting (for example, helping us to follow the fasting calendar even though she does not). My recommendation is for you to pray for your husband and keep your marriage intact. What better way for us to witness our faith?

  • @misschris325
    @misschris325 День назад +22

    My husband is currently raging at me- including his opinion that I'm spending too much time away from home, at my local monastery. He will not come to service and can be disparaging about this path. I try not to despair but he can be awfully cruel. I will keep praying for him but don't think I can do this much longer. God willing, his heart will soften and open up. Hurt people hurt.

    • @Taran532
      @Taran532 День назад +9

      It took awhile but my husband finally accepted me going to Liturgy on Sunday morning but if I try to take it any further he starts threatening me with divorce. I’d love to attend the nighttime catechumen classes and spend more time being involved with the church but he says that’s taking it too far. So I’m sorta stuck in place.

    • @rebekahs9701
      @rebekahs9701 День назад +7

      Don't call him cruel. Try not to even think it. Your judgement is dangerous. Read St Paisios "Family Life". And "Our thoughts determined our lives" by Elder Thaddeus of Vitovnica. Both are free audio books here on RUclips. Prayers sister.

    • @Panagiotis-ez8xc
      @Panagiotis-ez8xc День назад +6

      You don't need permission from your husband to be with God. "Raging" and "awfully cruel" are strong words. Even if they are subjective, your feeling of exhaustion and sadness is not and should not be suppressed.
      It's time to reconsider your priorities. Make it clear to your husband that if he forces you to choose between God and him, you will choose God. No matter how "trivial" his remarks will be the next time. He has no business controlling, manipulating and guilt-tripping you.

    • @kingdomkid7225
      @kingdomkid7225 День назад +6

      PLEASE speak to your priest sister. This is very serious. He can tell you how to tread and be your guide through Christ

    • @rebekahs9701
      @rebekahs9701 День назад +3

      Also, for what it's worth it took me about 3 years of being Orthodox before I realized what a self-righteous hurtful person I was to all the people I looked down on for being morally or religiously less than me. We are naturally exceedingly blind to our own cruelty. In the first glowing zeal of conversion, it's easy to feel like other people have no cause to be upset at us for our beautiful faith, and to do great harm to others -- emotional and spiritual. We think there's no way we did anything to deserve their anger, and it's just their evilness at our piety that makes them upset. But actually sometimes there's a lot that we haven't even realized about ourselves.... we can be really awful to other people without even realizing it. A few years of Orthodoxy will take this away, priests in confession are very very good for showing us our own sins, so I strongly urge you not to burn your bridges now before you might not yet be able to fully see yourself. If you are new to Orthodoxy, it might take a few years before you start to really see yourself clearly. Then other people's behavior makes more sense, even if it is wrong. We can drive people from the truth with our own sins, and some of the biggest ones are pride and self-righteousness.

  • @Confessingjesuschrist
    @Confessingjesuschrist День назад +12

    I'm in a similar situation with my wife, but I think my wife is watching closely and looking to see if this is a phase, or if it is truly what I say it is to me.
    She told me she doesn't want to commit to conversion because she doesn't want to fake it, which I understand.
    She is still in agreement with the idea of baptizing our daughter, so I do have hope she will join fully with me and our family.

    • @rebekahs9701
      @rebekahs9701 День назад

      I hesitated for the same reason when me and my (now) husband were dating. We were both Protestant at the time, and I was worried that he was just going through a phase, and as much as I didn't want to convert at the time, I really didn't want to convert and then de-convert later. Give her a few years and she will see that it's real and she'll most probably join you.

    • @guitarbyniko
      @guitarbyniko 12 часов назад

      I’m now a catechuman and Christ saved me from myself. In Christ I’m free but when turning away it’s pride. My soon to be wife is lutheran but not really devout Christian, she believes there’s God and in Jesus but doesn’t take intrest to read the Gospels etc. So not that kind of belief to get to in relationship with Jesus Christ. And I’ve been horrible because my stubborness to trying to teach/apology/preach etc… I’ve been trying to take control and not Christ do His work. And I thank my fiancee that she said many times enough, and my passion for Christ and His Church it just love so obviously I speak about it but It’s not good for her. I need to ve quiet about Gospels and Saints. And just do prayers and thank God that she does want sometimes to come Church with me. And she does let me to take our little boy(1year old) to divine liturgy❤ God sees my dumb brain and my personality, And He does guide when I’m obedient to Him☦️❤

  • @Razamaniac
    @Razamaniac 22 часа назад +4

    As Saint Paisios the Athonite said, when the words don't reach the ears, ''zip it and let the knees do the talking''

  • @kenmorford7316
    @kenmorford7316 День назад +2

    Thanks!

  • @gregory98766
    @gregory98766 14 часов назад

    Thank you Father.

  • @JoeyMontego
    @JoeyMontego День назад +4

    Every widely accepted Orthodox prayer book I have been exposed to includes Psalm 50 from the Holy Scriptures that states "I shall teach tansgressors Thy ways, and the ungodly shall turn back unto thee." From reading the lives of the saints and from my own lived experience, without teaching, it it most difficult for the ungodly to turn the truth. I'm most thankful to those who have brought me out of error through their teaching, repentance, humility, truth, and love.

    • @Buck-n5n
      @Buck-n5n День назад

      This would seem to contradict what Father Peter just said about not becoming a teacher, but as I think about it, I read Psalm 50 daily, how can I read aloud the Psalm as my own prayer, "I shall teach transgressors Thy ways", and resolve in in my mind to not become a teacher? It would seem the Patristic Saintly example was to teach us, is it not then for us to follow the example and also teach? Maybe Father Peter can qualify those statements. In my own personal experience, specially in the beginning, it was me teaching that brought my family members into orthodoxy. They were already extremely devout with very developed daily prayer lives, daily scripture readings, repentance, loving the poor and needy, really living transformed lives. It was out of ignorance that they did not know about Orthodoxy as that is not the Christianity they were presented with. It was knowledge of orthodoxy that then lead to the direct experience of it.

  • @johnnyd2383
    @johnnyd2383 22 часа назад +1

    Lead you husband by your example... with kindness, humility, obedience and meekness.

  • @rachelarmstrong807
    @rachelarmstrong807 День назад +4

    These Saints might be helpful for inspiration and intercession: St. Nona, St. Juliana of Lazarevo, and St. Xenia of St. Petersburg.

  • @vrhovnipredstojnik7650
    @vrhovnipredstojnik7650 17 часов назад

    Thank you, Father!

  • @LoftOfTheUniverse
    @LoftOfTheUniverse 16 часов назад +2

    My spouse is very emotional and opposed to going to Orthodoxy because she sees it as an option as a Christian and that protestantism is more accurate.
    It's been very difficult, especially because our finaces are very tight + health issues. We've been fighting on and off about Orthodoxy... Trying to be patient and not fall into arguments.

    • @LadyMaria
      @LadyMaria 51 минуту назад

      But how is Protestantism more accurate when it's subjective?

  • @thecriticalnous
    @thecriticalnous День назад +3

    Prayer changes people and situations.

  • @jbpeltier
    @jbpeltier День назад +1

    I'm becoming Orthodox, and my wife is unfortunately entirely obstinate about it. And I have, also unfortunately, become a bit of a bully, a preacher, _and_ a teacher during disagreements in recent months. Say a prayer for me. Lord have mercy.

  • @Panagiotis-ez8xc
    @Panagiotis-ez8xc День назад +4

    My first rule for finding a suitable partner: she must be an Orthodox Christian. Not just respect or tolerate this faith, but be an active believer. I don't see how a marriage can happen inside God's own home, with an orthodox priest, when the wife doesn't even acknowledge the sacrament, the divine presence and intervention. God cannot be fooled. I, on my part, do not accept civil, islamic, jewish etc. marriages. So I don't even bother to start a relationship with such a woman. I respect her, I can work with her and be productive, I might enjoy her company, but it stops there.

    • @rebekahs9701
      @rebekahs9701 День назад +2

      Absolutely right that one shouldn't deliberately start a marriage with someone who is not orthodox. That being said, continuing one that has already taken place is the right thing to do. And marriages outside the church are still marriages, you can find that taught clearly in the Orthodox Church. Be careful about dismissing non-orthodox marriages as nothing, because then the devil might use that to tempt people to justify adultery ("she wasn't *really* married at the time...").

    • @BaikalTii
      @BaikalTii День назад

      that's not even the discussion here. try to keep up. the problem is when an already married person wants to convert.
      God blesses all marriages; the wife of our youth is the wife of our youth. we are not free to seek another. Fr speaks wisdom in this video.

  • @user-qg1oq8it7c
    @user-qg1oq8it7c 17 часов назад

    "Be still, and know that I am God"

  • @FoundSheep-AN
    @FoundSheep-AN День назад +5

    Usually it’s normal in Slavic Orthodox Countries that women go to church and men don’t, usually. Culturally it seems like it’s the woman of the family who prays for everyone etc
    So it’s normal even if he won’t ever go to church or be orthodox , the woman can pray for him and never push him too much
    Since she is married her first duty is to keep the family together, she is not a nun
    If she is new to orthodoxy maybe the husband will follow her in the future, she has to be patient cause she is new herself

    • @LadyMaria
      @LadyMaria 47 минут назад

      In Orthodoxy, men are expected to go to church like women do. Culture doesn't matter, it's just laziness.

  • @rachelarmstrong807
    @rachelarmstrong807 День назад +1

    I saw you also had this question once: what do you do if BOTH of you are Orthodox but one person doesn't really want to attend services, or fast, or basically practice the faith? Would the answer be the same?

  • @orthodox.saints.teachers
    @orthodox.saints.teachers 20 часов назад

    💜💚🧡💚💙💜🤎

  • @mariebo7491
    @mariebo7491 День назад +1

    Ok…..so what if he never converts?…Is she to remain a catechumen and never participate in the sacraments?? Wouldn’t she be disobeying God??

    • @johnnyd2383
      @johnnyd2383 22 часа назад +1

      At 4:00 that question has been answered.

    • @mariebo7491
      @mariebo7491 12 часов назад

      @@johnnyd2383no, it wasn’t. Don’t rush and wait, in the meantime grow closer to Jesus does not answer the question. Just don’t rush and wait….until when? What if her husband never converts? Is she never to get baptized and partake of the Eucharist while she waits for something that may never happen? How long is too long? Is she not disobeying God by not getting baptized into the church and taking the Eucharist? This is important to me because I’m in the same situation. My husband is a staunch reformed Baptist with zero interest in Orthodoxy. I’ve been living like an Orthodox for about a year. I want to be baptized.

  • @Buck-n5n
    @Buck-n5n День назад

    I guess my confusion stems from constantly hearing we should follow the Saints, we should follow the scriptures and they teach us to teach, but when it comes to teaching I generally hear don't teach. Not just from Father Peter but also from other priests. To teach or not to teach? Follow the Saints except when it comes to teaching? I ask this not out of a desire to debate or argue but this seems rather contradictory? I'm sure it's my human weakness that causes the confusion. Maybe there's more percise language that can be used? Isn't teaching by example, teaching by loving, teaching by repenting, teaching by humility, still under the umbrella of teaching? But becoming a teacher is not good? I need help understanding this.

  • @iamchristian5735
    @iamchristian5735 День назад

    Leave your Husband and Follow Jesus Trust in God live with the Lord
    If your husband doesn't like Orthodoxy which means the "True Path"
    Let him continue to seek the Lord and may God bless him and guide him to the right Path.
    In Marriage both the men and the woman has to have One Faith ✝️

    • @rebekahs9701
      @rebekahs9701 День назад +1

      Dude, are you even Orthodox or are you one of those Protestant groups it's always pushing divorce with every one who isn't in there very specific sect of forty people...

    • @LadyMaria
      @LadyMaria 49 минут назад

      That is horrible advice.